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Please read carefully!

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Writing Exam Information on Planning your Essay

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Writing Exam Information on Planning your Essay

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This page is for you to post ideas in group and individual work.

You can add a post and also comment on other people's post.

Remember to be respectful. All bad language will be deleted, alongside any inappropriate images.

Your teacher will show you how to post; just ask.

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Bye

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hi

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I’m rayna, i enjoy playing badminton

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Hello ,

I’m Areesha Kamran. I love cars and I love watching cricket.

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Hi,

My name is Scarlett.

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Hi I’m Hasan

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Hello,I’m Yicong and I come from China. Emm… That’s all.

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I come from China，I enjoy playing basketball and cooking

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I’m Hamm, nice to meet you!

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Hey everyone

I'm from India, but I've lived and studied in Dubai, UAE all my life.

I'm a huge tennis, foodie and love dancing, especially bollywood and ballet. Fun fact: I've been trained in ballet since the age of 3!

My favourite past time is to binge shows and movies.

As for English, I've studied it till A levels, and while it was the subject I looked forward to most, A level English almost broke me!

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I’m Elaine，here is my cat

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I’m from China, Suzhou, a very beautiful city which is close to Shanghai. However, my hometown is Xuzhou which is famous for BBQ. I’d appreciate it if you could come and visit my city.🥷

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I come from China, I am living in Brotherton House. My favorite K-pop team is Stray Kids ,if you want watch some concerts , I can with you together.

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Hi，my name is Siling CHEN，you can call me Celine. I am from China，I like taking photos～ It’s pleasure to meet you all.

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My nane is Betty. I am come from China. Last year I study in Bristol international foundation program. I hope I can through International Year 1.

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Areesha- what we will read at university

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Areesha- what we will read at university

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textbooks, case studies, books, e- books,specilist databases eg: google scholar,news websites ,theses, dissertation, Dictionary ( electronic and physical), business blogs, the Financial Times

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We'll be reading textbooks, articles, case studies, other scholars' works, news and magazines at University

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As an undergraduate student, I will be reading at the library of university, and reading more different types essays.

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Reading Textbooks and Academic Articles, Research Journals, news and some essays, reports, and literary works.

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we might go to the library to collect some document to support our essay, find some case studies in the book like macro-economics.

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Textbooks

Academic journal articles

Research papers

Case studies

Lecture notes and slides

Online academic resources

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As an undergraduate student, I think we will be reading:

• Textbooks related to our major

• Academic journal articles

• Research papers

• Case studies

• Chapters from core texts

• Lecture notes and slides

• Online academic resources

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Please watch and make notes on any useful/ important points (bring to class next week-quick quiz).

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How to Read a Journal Article in 10 Minutes or Less

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2. Highlighter worksheet (with examples)

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Business and Marketing reading types of reading:

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Business and Marketing reading types of reading:

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1. Financial Times

2. Harvard Business Review

3. Core texts (foundational theory e.g. consumer behaviour psychology texts)

4. Company reports

5. Company blogs (including marketing blurbs)

6. Business journals (Emerald insight/ Mintel/ Google Scholar/ JSTOR databases)

7. Our World in Data- visual/ graphic data with links to credible sources

8. Statistica

9. Government websites

10. Social Media posts

11. Case Studies

Students will likely work with a variety of materials, from traditional academic sources to contemporary digital content.

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Here is a list of useful questions to help when evaluating sources. If you didn't watch the video it is on your ppt Week 3, session 2.

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Eva Sources checklist CRAAP ADD TO PADLETS

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1. yes

2. yes

3. yes

4. yes

5. yes

6. yes

7. no

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1. Yes, it was published 2022

2. Yes, it is related to physicians and them being replaced by AI

3. Unkown

4. No

5. the source is supported by collected data but no citations

6. Yes the source dicusses both sides of the argument

7. No

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1.yes, it published on 2022 Feb 8th

2.yes

3.yes

4.not sure

5.yes

6.yes

7.yes

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1, yes

2, yes

3, yes

4, no

5, no

6.yes

7, yes

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Please make sure you know what your role is and you download and complete the right worksheet on Padlet (above). You will discuss your ideas next Friday in the last class of Week 5.

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This is your next article for the 2nd ARC in Week 5.

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Please make sure you complete and upload your annotated/ highlighted PDF by Friday 7th November. Upload on Study Smart- assessments-scroll down to folder. Add your name and class name to the file.

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Please work through this PPT over Progression Review Week. You can play the game with your friends on paper. Also, upload the short writing task on Padlet with your name. Thanks and have a lovely rest over PRW. See you in Week 7.

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This is a useful worksheet for your AES/ Study & Research writing.

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Please download and complete this form AFTER you have completed your ARC 2 discussion.

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You might find this helpful in understanding how the writing exam is marked.

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EX 3 Writing Exam Mark Sheet_STUDENT VERSION 2023 (1)

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In week 8, session 3 we will be doing a final ARC reading circle.

Please check your groups above and choose your roles (groups of 4 can have x2 connectors or x2 highlighters).

Download the text and then find worksheet on the Padlet (above) and complete your role carefully.

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Please download and complete your worksheet for session 3 (Friday, week 8). This is important practice for your seminar A summative, so do this carefully.

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ARC3 - The global environmental injustice of fast fashion

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Please download and make notes for BOTH questions.

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Student B: I see your point, you mean the supply chain and the place should be more transparent but it will belong the private of the company, some companies unwillingness publicity their data.

Student C: I agree with student B, the workers will faced low wages and excessive working hours.

Student A: Yes, so we not only need to consider the profit of companies but also focus on the equity of workers.

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A: well, as a consumer, I care most about the supply chain and where the clothes were made. you know in terms of exploitation of workers.

B: I see your point, you mean the employees could be exploited in the plant when they are manufacturing the clothes, but honestly speaking as the consumer I care more about prices .

c： I agree with the point you have made. consumers will really buy clothes that are cheaper to benefit themselves and they do not dive deep into the conditions of the workers.

a: yes, so we not only need to consider the exploitation of workers but also the price of the clothes and honestly speaking the quality too.

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A: well, as a consumer, I care most about the supply chain and where the clothes were made. you know in terms of exploitation of workers.

B: I see your point, you mean the employees could be exploited in the plant when they are manufacturing the clothes, but honestly speaking as the consumer I care more about prices .

c： I agree with the point you have made. consumers will really buy clothes that are cheaper to benefit themselves and they do not dive deep into the conditions of the workers.

a: yes, so we not only need to consider the exploitation of workers but also the price of the clothes and honestly speaking the quality too.

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Student A: Well, as a consumer, I care most about the supply chain and where the clothes were made. You know in terms of exploitation of workers.

Student B: I see your point, you mean the working conditions and pay of the workers in the factories, but for me, the greatest concern is the environmental impact unsustainable sourcing has and how that will affect us in the long run.

Student C: I agree with you on that. Personally, I think one of the most visible problems is the sheer amount of waste the fashion industry generates. Fast fashion models mean clothes are disposed frequently, piling up in landfills and polluting the planet.

Student A: Yes, so we not only need to consider the societal impact affected by unsustainable fashion, but also the environmental damage this is leaving for future generations.

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Student B：I see your point, you mean the supply chain and where the materials come from is really important, but for me, the quality of the fabric is where I am looking for, specially, eco-friendly materials are much better for the environment.

Student C: I agree with both points of you two, the materials do make a huge affect of the environment and the supply chain can give more support for the local clothing companies, however we should also can choose to buy second-hand clothes from vintage shops.

Student A: Yes, so we not only need to consider with where we buy the clothes from, but also some people may think the clothes from vintage shops are dirty, so they not tend to go.

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24-25 Mock Exam D Writing Question Paper

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Look at the highlighted parts. Can you spot the errors?

*Remember to check the sources to see if the student has paraphrased the source ideas correctly.

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Sample writing exam answer on retirement highlighted errors Group A

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Look at the highlighted parts. Can you spot the errors?

*Remember to check the sources to see if the student has paraphrased the source ideas correctly.

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Sample writing exam answer on retirement highlighted errors Group B

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Money cannot guarantee long-term happiness once basic needs are met. Futrelle (2014) argues that after essentials such as food, housing, and security are satisfied, additional income does not have a major  increase in happiness. Instead, experiences and strong social relationships are more important than material possessions. Happiness is closely linked to family and friends rather than wealth with studies showing that individuals who have five or more close friends are more likely to describe themselves as “very happy.” In addition, Pence (2014) highlights that factors other than money such as the environment people live in and their stress levels, play a major role in determining happiness. Happiness is also relative, as individuals often compare their income with others. Research shows that people would prefer to earn less if their colleagues earned less, rather than earn more while their co-workers earned more (Pence,2014). This demonstrates that happiness depends more on social comparison, relationships, and well-being than on money itself.

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Can money buy happiness?

Paragraph 1 -

To some extent, it may be true that money can buy happiness.There is some evidence to show that for example; Knapton argues that people who spent money on convenience purchases such as dishwashers appeared to have 23% better life satisfaction. Moreover knapton mentions the 6000 adults in western countries to be happier just by paying for services like cleaning.However, the argument clearly lacks weight because it does not consider middle eastern countries which makes this evidence biased.Furthermore, in regards to the second point peoples experiences have been generalised by knapton.Not everyone has a stressful experience cleaning manually, for some it can be therapeutic too. However, there is stronger evidence to show that money does not buy happiness.

Conclusion-

Overall, there is strong evidence to show that money does not buy happiness. It found that there are factors besides just money that impacts happiness for instance; the environment, people's stresses as well as relationships with each other. If we continue to emulate billionaires like Elon musk, happiness will be completely dependent on monetary factors.

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One significant argument is that money can save people time and reduce pressure. According to Knapton (2017), he suggests that people can buy purchases by money, like a dishwasher, reducing working time on housework and stress of cleaning dishes after meals, which is a great way to improve satisfaction level. This indicates that happy is not being so rich but buying something we need to help us in daily life and make our life more relaxed. As a result, individuals can spend their time on hobbies and relaxing.

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Hasan-Writing Pratise (Body 2, Conclusion)

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Hasan-Writing Pratise (Body 2, Conclusion)

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On the other hand, there is strong evidence shows that money cannot directly buy happiness. To start with according to the Penec (2014), Money is not the main factor which affects happiness, as the environment and stress levels. Money is extremely important to live in a qualified life with meeting the basic needs. However, there is no more after you have the basic quality of your life. Most important factors which affect the happiness are personal experiences and nonmaterialistic elements (Futrelle,2014). Moreover, cheerfulness does not improve by earning more income instead it makes you demand more (Penec, 2014).

In conclusion, there is no direct relation between wealth and happiness, there are more important points which affects joyfulness like intangible factors like health or family and friends.

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Now days, people become more and more rich. Some people argue that money can buy everything include happiness. However, there is strong evidence to show that money does not buy happiness.

Some people concern about money can buy happiness. Money can employee others outsourcing chores people don’t like bring people feel happier. Knapton（2017）showed that about 6000 adults in UK, Denmark, Canada and Netherlands paying fees for a cleaner to tidy their house. In addition, money also can bring convenance for people’s life. Knapton（2017）said that

In terms of the money not buy happiness,  there is some evidence to show, happiness is measured against other people-happiness rely on feeling better off than others, not only earning more. researchers demonstrate people will choose to earn less if their colleagues got less, rather than earning more if co-workers earned more. (Pence, 2014) This illustrates that people are concerned about their feelings, they do not want to get a high pressure on their workplace. According to Futrelle (2014), when people get their basic need in their daily life, money can not make them to be more happier. Their experience and mental needs are more vital than physical needs. These demonstrate that people are more concerned about their mental world, which making them to be happy and focus on their passions. Also as noted by Futrelle(2014), the key role of people’s origin of happiness is their family and friends. A recent research demonstrated that people have more friends such as 5 or more, are seems like “very happy”. As a result, family, friends , less pressure level and the feelings can make people to be happy rather than just money.

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can money buy happiness?

paragraph 1-

To some extent, it may be true that money can buy happiness.There is some evidence to show that for example; Knapton argues that people who spent money on convenience purchases such as dishwashers appeared to have 23% better life satisfaction. Moreover knapton mentions the 6000 adults in western countries to be happier just by paying for services like cleaning.However, the argument clearly lacks weight because it does not consider middle eastern countries which makes this evidence biased.Furthermore, in regards to the second point peoples experiences have been generalised by knapton.Not everyone has a stressful experience cleaning manually, for some it can be therapeutic too. However, there is stronger evidence to show that money does not buy happiness.

conclusion -

Overall, there is strong evidence to show that money does not buy happiness. It found that there are factors besides just money that impacts happiness for instance; the environment, people's stresses as well as relationships with each other. If we continue to emulate billionaires like Elon musk, happiness will be completely dependent on monetary factors.

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Introduction, body 1, part of body 2,

In recent years, the topic of whether happiness influenced by money has sparked considerable debate.This essay will argue that happiness is not only affected by money, but also affected by compare and being satisfied, such as close friends , and stress from environment.

One key factor of happiness is undeniably that money. There is some evidence to show that shopping will support people get more happiness, for example, Knapton( 2017) states that money can help people get access to higher level of happiness, which is based on the observations that included 6000 adults in some west countries, such as US, Denmark, Canada and Netherlands.

While it is true that money can buy happiness has some merit, it fails to consider the more significant factors, such as relax working environment, kind family members and friends. By the research from Penec(2014), researcher argue that happiness is strongly influenced ny people, take, for example, people would feel happiness when they get low skill level colleagues. (didn’t finish)

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In modern society, money plays a central role in almost every aspect of human life. From the basic needs, such as transport, education, housing, foods and others. Based on the situation, the question of whether money can buy happiness has been widely debated. Some people thinks that wealthy can leads to a happier life, and others disagree this argument, who thinks other factors than money affect happiness. This essay will argue that money can buy part of happiness, but it is not the foundational factors of happiness.

On the one hand, being rich cannot directly increase the happiness levels. According to the survey, in the past 50 years, the wealth of western nations had a significant increase in, but it has not successfully increase happiness levels of people (Pence, 2014). This report means that money can not directly buy happiness for people. Apart from that, the demand and circumstances of people will increase with the improvement of the income levels, and happiness levels cannot increase like income levels (Pence, 2014)

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Bady paragraph 2: secondly, happiness is measured against other people. Penec’s 2014 surveys show that employees prefer a lower absolute salary if it keeps them ahead of colleagues; earning 50,000 dollars while peers earn 60,000 feels worse than earning 40,000 when peers earn 35,000. Because satisfaction is calibrated to relative rather than absolute income, extra money buys contentment chiefly when it preserves or improves one’s rank within the reference group.

Conclusion: in short, the research shows that cash improves well-being only when it secures either relative advantage or liberated time. Policy and personal budgets should therefore prioritize time-saving services and experiential spending over status competition; beyond these strategic uses, additional income yields rapidly diminishing happiness returns.

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Introduction and Body paragraphy1 Allen

Now days more and more people are not satisfied with their life and most of them feel unhappy because they think money can buy happiness but they don’t have. However, money can not directly buy happiness. The real happiness belongs to the contented people instead of the rich. This essay will argue that whether money can buy happiness.

On one hand, money can do contribute to happiness. There is some evidence to show that money does help to make people feel happy. Knapton (2017) claims that using money to get some free time does contribute to greater happiness. People can outsource the chores they don’t like can make them feel happier because it’s time saving so that they can have more times to do what they do like to do. Moreover, using money also means that it can help you avoid something may make you feel disappointed or unhappy. For example, Knapton (2017) states that people who are willing to pay for timesaving goods like dishwasher are more satisfied with their life. And not only the rich can gain happiness from it but also the people from all levels of income can feel happy through using money to buy free time.

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For many people ,money is one of the important things in our life.These people believes that money can solve almost problem in our life .However, other people believe that money does not means happiness. This essay will argues that money can’t buy happiness.

Some people believe that money does buy happiness.There is an argument that money might be  possible service to people.For example, Knapton (2017) claims that money help people to solve the unhappiness issue.when people meet some problems, money could bring some happiness moment. Moreover, Knapton (2017) suggests that money may be bring more free time to people in some sometimes.people could cost some money to workers.Thus ,it would seem that money might buy happiness.

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On the other hand, there are certain things money can buy which do lead to increased happiness. According to Knapton (2017), a study of 6000 adults from the US, Denmark, Canada, and the Netherlands indicated that hiring a cleaner or outsourcing unpleasant tasks contributes to increased happiness. That being said, this study can be considered weak evidence as it was conducted in just 4 countries which is not representative of the whole world, hence the data from it is not fully accurate or credible.

There is more evidence to suggest money cannot buy happiness, so coming back to that. Elements beyond financial resources influence happiness, including your living environment and stress levels (Penec, 2014). Where you live, the kind of work you do, convenience and ease are just some of the factors that affect happiness. For example, if you’re working in a job you don’t like or in a high stakes environment with a lot of pressure and getting paid quite well, you would not be happy as what you spend most of your time doing doesn’t bring you any satisfaction. This further reaffirms Penec’s point of other factors influencing happiness.

Additionally, Futrelle (2014) states family and friends are the key to happiness. The people you surround yourself with and their energy plays a big part in your mood. Everyone needs someone to share experiences with, try new things, laugh and cry with. In fact a recent study indicated that individuals with five or more close friends are more prone to call themselves as very happy (Futrelle, 2014).

In conclusion, while wealth can provide temporary relief, it is not a guaranteed path to long-term fulfillment. Research shows there is no direct correlation of happiness levels rising as people get richer. To achieve happiness, one should look past financial wealth after and focus on the essential components of human life: meaningful connections, family bonds, and a clear sense of purpose.

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Whether money can buy happiness remains debated. Some people think money will improve well-being by reducing stress and providing freedom, in the place, happiness also depends on relationships and purpose. Money only brings the limitation of happiness.

It may be true to some extent that money can purchase happiness. Knapton (2017) claims that money helps people to save time. For example, people spend money buy a dishwasher and 23% people think it brings high quality life style for them in daily life. They have more time to solve other things and avoid negative experience.

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SIBMMA3  Seminar B schedule -Student version

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Link to video Behaviour Change and Climate 

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Link to video Behaviour Change and Climate 

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Behaviour Change: From the Individual to the System | iMooX.at

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How to write a topic sentence for body paragraphs:

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How to write a topic sentence for body paragraphs:

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1.Do not include citations in topic sentences (keep it as your words).

2.Avoid using personal language like I think/ in my opinion.

3.A good topic sentence contains three parts:

The essay topic: moving to a cashless society.

A stance or a side: Argument for moving to a cashless society…

A controlling idea or focus for that paragraph: in terms of customer

convenience and speed and better financial inclusion.

Arguments for moving to a cashless society exist in terms of customer of customer convenience and speed and better financial inclusion.

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As an academic writer, you are expected to be critical of the sources that you use. This essentially means questioning what you read and not necessarily agreeing with it just because the information has been published. Being critical can also mean looking for reasons why we should not just accept something as being correct or true. This can require you to identify problems with a writer's arguments or methods, or perhaps to refer to other people's criticisms of these. Constructive criticism goes beyond this by suggesting ways in which a piece of research or writing could be improved.
... being against is not enough. We also need to develop habits of constructive thinking.
Edward de Bono

Highlighting inadequacies of previous studies

Previous studies of X have not dealt with ...
Researchers have not treated X in much detail.
Such expositions are unsatisfactory because they ...
Most studies in the field of X have only focused on ...
Such approaches, however, have failed to address ...
Previous published studies are limited to local surveys.
Half of the studies evaluated failed to specify whether ...
The research to date has tended to focus on X rather than
published studies on the effect of X are not consistent.
Smith's analysis does not take account of ..., nor does she examine ...

The existing accounts fail to resolve the contradiction between X and Y.
Most studies of X have only been carried out in a small number of areas.
However, much of the research up to now has been descriptive in nature ...
The generalisability of much published research on this issue is problematic.
Research on the subject has been mostly restricted to limited comparisons of ...
However, few writers have been able to draw on any systematic research into ...
Short-term studies such as these do not necessarily show subtle changes over time ...
Although extensive research has been carried out on X, no single study exists which ...
However, these results were based upon data from over 30 years ago and it is unclear if ...
The experimental data are rather controversial, and there is no general agreement about ...

Identifying a weakness in a single study or paper

(However,)

Smith fails to fully define what ...
Jones fails to acknowledge the significance of ...
the author overlooks the fact that X contributes to Y.
what Smith fails to do is to draw a distinction between ...
the paper would appear to be over-ambitious in its claims.
another weakness is that we are given no explanation of how ...
no attempt was made to quantify the association between X and Y.
the main weakness of the study is the failure to address how ...
the study fails to consider the differing categories of damage that ...
the research does not take into account pre-existing ... such as ...
the author offers no explanation for the distinction between X and Y.
Smith makes no attempt to differentiate between different types of X.

Smith
The paper
The book

fails to
does not
makes no attempt to

specify ...
quantify ...
compare ...
separate ...
account for ...
suggest why ...
analyse how ...
ascertain whether ...
distinguish between ...
explain the meaning of ...
provide information on ...
address the question of ...
assess the effectiveness of ...
use a standardised method of ...
give sufficient consideration to ...
consider the long term impact of ...
offer an adequate explanation for ...
engage with current discourses on ...
determine the underlying causes of ...
systematically review all the relevant literature.

Offering constructive suggestions

The study would have been more interesting if it had included ...
These studies would have been more useful if they had focused on ...
The study would have been more relevant if the researchers had asked ...
The questionnaire would have been more useful if it had asked participants about ...
The research would have been more relevant if a wider range of X had been explored

Introducing problems and limitations: theory or argument

Smith's argument relies too heavily on ...
The main weakness with this theory is that ...
The key problem with this explanation is that ...
However, this theory does not fully explain why ...
One criticism of much of the literature on X is that ...
Critics question the ability of the X theory to provide ...
However, there is an inconsistency with this argument.

A serious weakness with this argument, however, is that ...
However, such explanations tend to overlook the fact that ...
One of the main difficulties with this line of reasoning is that ...
Smith's interpretation overlooks much of the historical research ...
Many writers have challenged Smith's claim on the grounds that ...
The X theory has been criticised for being based on weak evidence.
A final criticism of the theory of X is that it struggles to explain some aspects of ...

The theory is unable to

predict ...
explain why ...
fully account for ...
adequately explain the ...
explain what happens when ...
make any useful prediction about ...
explain the differences observed when ...
provide a comprehensive explanation for ...

Introducing problems and limitations: method or practice

The limitation of this approach is that ...
A major problem with the X method is that ...
One major drawback of this approach is that ...
A criticism of this experimental design is that ...
The main limitation of this technique, however, is ...
Selection bias is another potential concern because ...

Perhaps the most serious disadvantage of this method is that ...
In recent years, however, this approach has been challenged by ...
Non-government agencies are also very critical of the new policies.
All the studies reviewed so far, however, suffer from the fact that ...
Critics of laboratory-based experiments contend that such studies ...
There are certain problems with the use of focus groups. One of these is that there is less ...

However,

this method of analysis has a number of limitations.
this method does involve potential measurement error.
there are limits to how far the idea of/concept of X can be taken.
one of the problems with the instrument used to measure X was ...
approaches of this kind carry with them various well known limitations.

However, all the previously mentioned methods suffer from some serious

drawbacks.
limitations.
weaknesses.
shortcomings.
disadvantages.

Introducing general criticism

Critics question the ability of poststructuralist theory to provide ...
Non-government agencies are also very critical of the new policies.
Smith's meta-analysis has been subjected to considerable criticism.
The most important of these criticisms is that Smith failed to note that ...
The X theory has been vigorously challenged in recent years by a number of writers.
These claims have been strongly contested in recent years by a number of writers.
More recent arguments against X have been summarised by Smith and Jones (1982):
Critics have also argued that not only do surveys provide an inaccurate measure of X, but the ...
Many analysts now argue that the strategy of X has not been successful. Jones (2003), for example, argues that ...

Introducing the critical stance of particular writers

Smith (2014) disputes this account of ...
Jones (2003) has also questioned why ...
However, Jones (2015) points out that ...
The author challenges the widely held view that ...
Smith (1999) takes issue with the contention that ...
The idea that ... was first challenged by Smith (1992).
Smith is critical of the tendency to compartmentalise X.
However, Smith (1967) questioned this hypothesis and ...

Jones (2003) has challenged some of Smith's conclusions, arguing that ...
Another major criticism of Smith's study, made by Jones (2003), is that ...
Jones (2003) is probably the best-known critic of the X theory. He argues that ...
In her discussion of X, Smith further criticises the ways in which some authors ...
Smith's decision to reject the classical explanation of X merits some discussion ...
In a recent article in Academic Journal, Smith (2014) questions the extent to which ...
The latter point has been devastatingly critiqued by Jones (2003), who argues that ...
A recently published article by Smith et al. (2011) casts doubt on Jones' assumption that ...
Other authors (see Smith, 2012; Jones, 2014) question the usefulness of such an approach.

Smith (2020)

criticises ...
questions ...
challenges ...
is critical of ...
casts doubt on ...
points out that ...
takes issue with...
raises a number of questions about ...

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As an academic writer, you are expected to be critical of the sources that you use. This essentially means questioning what you read and not necessarily agreeing with it just because the information has been published. Being critical can also mean looking for reasons why we should not just accept something as being correct or true.

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A very useful guide from Unversity of Westminster. It has a great section on thesis statements.

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LibGuides: Essay Writing: Argument and criticality

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LibGuides: Essay Writing: Argument and criticality

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https://forms.office.com/r/fvJM7zCfjY Click on the link and complete the form with OR without a partner.

You have 15 minutes (there is a timer).

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Topic Sentences, Session 2, Week 15, ACE Writing Skills

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Topic Sentences, Session 2, Week 15, ACE Writing Skills

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Areesha kamran-negative impact of social media on young people.

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Areesha kamran-negative impact of social media on young people.

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Social media is used worldwide and it has several negative effects on young people and their mental health. 60% of youth are users of social media and they spend 2 or more hours daily on it.

Firstly, social media use causes insecurity because the young people are exposed to the pictures and vidoes of others best moments. The best moments shown on social media exclude the behind the scenes which leads to comparisons. These comparisons make young people insecure about themselves; their appearence and lifestyle.

Secondly, there is evidence on social media' social currency's negative implications on the young people. Social currency refers to lkes and shares which validate young people about their looks and lifestyle. It is referred to as a recorded transaction hence if for instance an individual does not get the desired likes or shares, it takes a toll on young peoples mental healths.

Lastly, the use of social media tends to instill fomo in young people. Fomo refers to the fear of missing out. Individuals see other users of social media posting and feel their absence in certain places. When this feeling is ignored or not taken seriously, it results in development of social anxiety and irrational withdrawals in young people.

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Scarlett- the impact of social media on young people 

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Scarlett- the impact of social media on young people 

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There are three main negative effects of social media on young people, including insecurity, social currency, and fear of missing out(FOMO). Firstly, it causes insecurity, because young users would compare themselves to others when they using social media, leading to fell less confident, as well as feel uncomfortable with their personality. Secondly, social media lead young people in social currency, where likes and shares are seen as valuable, so young people often judge their own personality online. For example, some teenagers feel anxious when their posts do not get many likes or when they cannot check their phones. Therefore, social media increases the fear of missing out and makes young people become more dependent on their phones. Overall, these issues show the strong impact of social media on young people.

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social media is used by majority of youth throughout the world and can start to have an impact on them. These impacts can be negative to the youth by harming there self image and confidence. This can be done by seeing other peoples posts and highlights by just seeing the best life possible posted on social media leading them to believe that every day is like that for them an they never have to face the hard part of life even though that is not correct. social media also brings out a social currency where likes and comments are being treated as currency where you have more the more you are liked. this also brings out a fear of missing out in the youth making them feel like they have to be included in everything and are scared of missing an event and this is a negative impact on the youth.

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These are three main negative aspects of social media on young people. The first point is increase insecurity among young people by constant exposing them to idealized images through comparing them with others. The idea of social currency on social media pressures young people to measure their self-worth through likes, followers, and comments. Social media intensifies the fear of missing out (FOMO), that means people ignored many informations.

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Beyond the screen’s glow, social media creates a multifaceted world where mental health is traded for digital acceptance. Starting with insecurities which has plagued the youth for decades now, but it worsens the highlight reel phenomenon. If you notice, people only share their most desirable and unforgettable moments, unknowingly creating a toxic cycle of insecurity on others who compare their lives to others' best versions. This is further emphasized by the idea of social currency through the number of likes, comments and reposts, except here the product is the people itself. The number of likes, comments, and shares are counted transactions that the youth translates into self worth and lets them define it. Adding on, it is made worse by a new breed of social anxiety known as Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) causing people to be stuck to their devices. Even those who want to take a break from the negative energy or want to cut off distractions often can’t due to fear of losing their place in the world if they log off for an instant. What started as a way to stay in touch has turned into a full time job of managing your image, and to stay relevant, you have to pay a constant price with your own peace of mind.

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First of all, it will constant exposure to idealized content leads to unhealthy social comparison, fueling anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. The addictive design of platforms, driven by likes and notifications, also disrupts sleep and creates a fear of missing out (FOMO).

Apart from that, it may make distorted Worldview and Social Skills. Algorithmic filter bubbles limit exposure to diverse perspectives, reinforcing stereotypes and extreme views. Over-reliance on digital interaction can also stunt the development of crucial real-life social skills, such as reading non-verbal cues and building deep empathy. In the end, it may affect the Erosion of Privacy and Safety. Because young users often do not fully grasp the permanence of their digital footprint, risking future reputational harm. They are also vulnerable to data harvesting, targeted manipulation, and online harassment like cyberbullying, with significant personal consequences.

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One of the most negative effects of social media is that it has led to insecurity and fear of missing out (FOMO) among young people. This is because, through social media, people are exposed to beautiful photos, luxurious lifestyles, and perfect body types, which are not realistic, thus leading people to compare their real lives with those portrayed by other people on social media. This has led many young people, especially teenagers, to feel that they are not beautiful, successful, or popular enough, even when there is nothing wrong with their real achievements or lives. This has, therefore, led to insecurity, which has resulted in a decrease in self-confidence, as people compare themselves with others on social media. On the other hand, FOMO has led people to feel that everyone is having a better experience without them, thus creating anxiety in young people.

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Social media has several negative impacts on younger. First, using social media would increased insecurity, children may compared with others on social media, resulting in bad self-evaluation. Then, social media creates a social currency system, like shootings, followers. Young people would seems this as a standard to evaluate themselves, which is harmful to their mental heath and emotion. Moreover, Fear of missing out is a common consequence of social media use, individuals afraid they can’t share great exprience and life in website to attach audiences’ attentions, linked to anxiety, lower social wellbeing, and increased compulsive social media use, demonstrating a negative psychological impact. To sum up, social media s adverse effects on the mental health and self-perception of young people are undeniable. It is crucial for young individuals to stay aware of these harms and maintain a rational and balanced approach to social media using.

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Use this example of how to structure a paragraph if you are needing some help. Remember each supporting point needs evidence (ideally more than one piece) in order to score well for synthesis (wider reading).

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Your formative is due on the 13th not the 12th. Good news!

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Make sure you use this to check you have completed all parts of the ACE draft, before you submit.

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Proofreading checklist - ACE DRAFT Session 3

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Use these tips to think about how to weave evidence into your body paragraphs.