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http://www.nasponline.org/resources-and-publications/resources/school-safety-and-crisis/preventing-youth-suicide/preventing-youth-suicide-tips-for-parents-and-educators

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National Association of School Psychologists (NASP)

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Suicide is the second leading cause of death among school age youth. However, suicide is preventable. Youth who are contemplating suicide frequently give warning signs of their distress. Parents, teachers, and friends are in a key position to pick up on these signs and get help. Most important is to never take these warning signs lightly or promise to keep them secret. When all adults and students in the school community are committed to making suicide prevention a priority-and are empowered to take the correct actions-we can help youth before they engage in behavior with irreversible consequences.

Suicide Risk Factors

Although far from perfect predictors, certain characteristics are associated with increased odd of having suicidal thoughts. These include:

Mental illness including depression, conduct disorders, and substance abuse.

Family stress/dysfunction.

Environmental risks, including presence of a firearm in the home.

Situational crises (e.g., traumatic death of a loved one, physical or sexual abuse, family violence).

Suicide Warning Signs

Most suicidal youth demonstrate observable behaviors that signal their suicidal thinking. These include:

Suicidal threats in the form of direct ("I am going to kill myself") and indirect ("I wish I could fall asleep and never wake up again") statements.

Suicide notes and plans (including online postings).

Prior suicidal behavior.

Making final arrangements (e.g., making funeral arrangements, writing a will, giving away prized possessions).

Preoccupation with death.

Changes in behavior, appearance, thoughts and/or feelings.

What to Do

Youth who feel suicidal are not likely to seek help directly; however, parents, school personnel, and peers can recognize the warning signs and take immediate action to keep the youth safe. When a youth gives signs that they may be considering suicide, the following actions should be taken:

Remain calm.

Ask the youth directly if he or she is thinking about suicide (e.g., "Are you thinking of suicide?").

Focus on your concern for their well-being and avoid being accusatory.

Listen.

Reassure them that there is help and they will not feel like this forever.

Do not judge.

Provide constant supervision. Do not leave the youth alone.

Remove means for self-harm.

Get help: No one should ever agree to keep a youth's suicidal thoughts a secret and instead should tell an appropriate caregiving adult, such as a parent, teacher, or school psychologist. Parents should seek help from school or community mental health resources as soon as possible. School staff should take the student to a school-employed mental health professional or administrator.

The Role of the School in Suicide Prevention

Children and adolescents spend a substantial part of their day in school under the supervision of school personnel. Effective suicide and violence prevention is integrated with supportive mental health services, engages the entire school community, and is imbedded in a positive school climate through student behavioral expectations and a caring and trusting student/adult relationship. Therefore, it is crucial for all school staff members to be familiar with, and watchful for, risk factors and warning signs of suicidal behavior. The entire school staff should work to create an environment where students feel safe sharing such information. School psychologists and other crisis response team personnel, including the school counselor and school administrator, are trained to intervene when a student is identified at risk for suicide. These individuals conduct suicide risk assessment, warn/inform parents, provide recommendations and referrals to community services, and often provide follow up counseling and support at school.

Parental Notification and Participation

Even if a youth is judged to be at low risk for suicidal behavior, schools may ask parents to sign a documentation form to indicate that relevant information has been provided. Parental notifications must be documented. Additionally, parents are crucial members of a suicide risk assessment as they often have information critical to making an appropriate assessment of risk, including mental health history, family dynamics, recent traumatic events, and previous suicidal behaviors. After a school notifies a parent of their child's risk for suicide and provides referral information, the responsibility falls upon the parent to seek mental health assistance for their child. Parents must:

Continue to take threats seriously: Follow through is important even after the child calms down or informs the parent "they didn't mean it." Avoid assuming behavior is simply attention seeking (but at the same time avoid reinforcing suicide threats; e.g., by allowing the student who has threatened suicide to drive because they were denied access to the car).

Access school supports: If parents are uncomfortable with following through on referrals, they can give the school psychologist permission to contact the referral agency, provide referral information, and follow up on the visit.

Maintain communication with the school: After such an intervention, the school will also provide follow-up supports. Your communication will be crucial to ensuring that the school is the safest, most comfortable place for your child.

Resiliency Factors

The presence of resiliency factors can lessen the potential of risk factors to lead to suicidal ideation and behaviors. Once a child or adolescent is considered at risk, schools, families, and friends should work to build these factors in and around the youth. These include:

Family support and cohesion, including good communication.

Peer support and close social networks.

School and community connectedness.

Cultural or religious beliefs that discourage suicide and promote healthy living.

Adaptive coping and problem-solving skills, including conflict-resolution.

General life satisfaction, good self-esteem, sense of purpose.

Easy access to effective medical and mental health resources.

© 2015, National Association of School Psychologists, 4340 East West Highway, Suite 402, Bethesda, MD 20814; (301) 657-0270, Fax (301) 657-0275; www.nasponline.org

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Preventing Youth Suicide: Tips for Parents & Educators

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Suicide is the second leading cause of death among school age youth. However, suicide is preventable . Youth who are contemplating suicide frequently give warning signs of their distress. Parents, teachers, and friends are in a key position to pick up on these signs and get help.

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This entire website is extremely general about suicide, but a great resource to have. It goes beyond just young adolescents because suicide can affect our students directly or indirectly.

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Skip to main content

We can all help prevent suicide. The 988 Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States.

988

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The 988 Lifeline is a national network of local crisis centers that provides free and confidential emotional support to people in suicidal crisis or emotional distress 24 hours a day, 7 days a week in the United States. We're committed to improving crisis services and advancing suicide prevention by empowering individuals, advancing professional best practices, and building awareness.

About The Lifeline

Anyone could be struggling with suicide. Find more specific resources below.

I'm Struggling With Individuals with Neurodivergence

We understand that every struggle is different. Experience the stories of people like you, and how they overcame crisis to find hope and recovery.
read stories of hope & recovery

First, you'll hear an automated message featuring additional options while your call is routed to your local 988 Lifeline network crisis center.

We'll play you a little music while we connect you to a skilled, trained crisis worker.

A trained crisis worker at your local center will answer the phone.

This person will listen to you, understand how your problem is affecting you, provide support, and get you the help you need.

988 Lifeline Center calls are free and confidential, and we're available 24/7.

Show What Happens When You Call The Lifeline

Everyone Plays A Role In Suicide Prevention

Get in touch

Call the Lifeline

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Skip to main content We can all help prevent suicide. The 988 Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States. 988 ¡Los servicios de texto y chat de 988 Lifeline ya están disponibles en español!

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Again, this features high school settings, but the information is still relevant to us.

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Furthermore, 15 percent of high school students in a recent survey said they had seriously considered suicide within the previous year. Teens are also particularly vulnerable to the phenomenon of suicide contagion, where one death seems to initiate others.

Amid the shock and grief over the events in Palo Alto, experts say it's important for concerned adults to know that steps can be taken to reduce the risk of teen suicide and help stop such deaths from spreading. And schools can play an important role.

Suicide doesn't strike at random. "Teachers should be aware that suicide is a multifaceted problem, in that 90 percent of kids who kill themselves have a psychiatric disorder," says Paula Clayton, medical director of the nonprofit American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP). "Even in suicide clusters, there's usually an underlying condition that's precipitated by a more recent event. The cause isn't just the breakup of a relationship, or a divorce in the home, or an arrest. It really is this underlying disorder, and this is the last straw."

Teenagers and young adults are particularly vulnerable to so-called suicide contagion. Madelyn Gould, professor of psychiatry and public health at Columbia University, has studied 50 such clusters nationwide. She explains that when a suicide occurs, it can reinforce suicidal thoughts among young people in the community who were already at risk. "We're most concerned about having some already-vulnerable person start to identify with the victim and really start to think that suicide is the solution to his or her problems," Gould says.

Educators can make a difference with prevention in two ways: by watching out for students who may be at risk, and -- for an even broader impact -- helping start a suicide-screening program at their school.

"Screening programs are incredibly effective," says Kelly Posner, director of the Columbia University Medical Center's Center for Suicide Risk Assessment, who notes that 45 percent of adults who commit suicide have recently seen their primary-care physician. "We should be asking these questions the way we monitor for blood pressure," she says. "Same thing in schools."

Educators can help reduce the risk of teen suicides by taking these measures:

Be on the Lookout

The AFSP's Paula Clayton explains that typical symptoms of depression include mood changes, such as sadness, boredom, irritability, or anxiety; loss of interest or pleasure in activities they used to enjoy; and eating or sleeping too much or too little.

In school, depression might manifest as students falling behind in class, acting tired or withdrawn, losing their concentration, quitting their usual activities, and spending less time with friends. Also, teens with depression tend to become negative about themselves, and ultimately some of them may talk about being absorbed with thoughts of death or wishing they were dead.

Moodiness is, of course, a quintessential teenage trait, so it can be hard to distinguish between what's normal and what's cause for alarm. "The difference is really that it's a change from their normal behavior, and then it's prolonged," Clayton says. "It's not just a month or two. It goes on. And it affects all aspects of the student."

Teachers can also take note of these risk factors for teen suicide, as listed by the CDC: a history of previous suicide attempts, depression, or other mental illness; a family history of suicide; alcohol or drug abuse; a stressful life event or loss; easy access to lethal methods; exposure to the suicidal behavior of others; and incarceration. Suicide among teens is, for reasons that are not well understood, at least four times as common for boys than girls.

Share Your Concern

Clayton recommends that teachers who are worried about a particular student reach out to a school nurse or counselor, or even directly to parents if the teacher has a close relationship with the child. She suggests following up by asking, "Bill is not quite up to his usual self, and I'm concerned about him. Do you want to come in and talk about it?" It's important to remember, she says, that "it really eventually is up to the parents to get the child into treatment."

Help Your School Start a Screening Program

Posner says research has found that high schools with screening programs can detect double the number of at-risk students as other schools. And, ultimately, screening results in lower suicide rates, she says.

Two commonly used screening programs are TeenScreen Schools and Communities, produced by Columbia University, and SOS Signs of Suicide, produced by the Massachusetts-based nonprofit Screening for Mental Health. TeenScreen provides schools with free mental-health screening questionnaires, instruction on how to use them, and guidelines on how to work with families when a student needs professional care. The SOS kits, at $300 each, include a DVD, a class discussion guide, and student screening tools, and are designed to educate students to recognize and respond to depression in themselves or others.

It's essential that schools that do screening have systems in place to refer students to follow-up care if needed. TeenScreen requires its participating schools to do this.

If a teen suicide occurs, educators can take these steps to discourage others from making the same choice:

Pay Attention to More Than Just the Victim's Inner Circle

Schools that experience such a loss routinely make extra counseling services available to students and staff, which Gould affirms is the right thing to do. She adds, though, that schools should be aware that frequently in clusters it's not the closest friends of the earlier victims who become the later victims, but youths who knew them indirectly or not at all.

Consider Doing Widespread Screening for Depression

"At-risk students won't necessarily self-identify, so if you just wait for students to come to the guidance office you'll be missing people," says Gould. This applies to teachers and other adults in the school community who may need care, as well.

Avoid Oversimplifying the Causes or Glamorizing the Act of Suicide

This requires a careful balancing of the mourners' needs to memorialize their loved one with measures to minimize the likelihood of contagion. Prominent or prolonged memorials may help grieving friends and families cope, but they may also reinforce the suicidal thoughts of other vulnerable teens. Gould suggests that schools proactively establish policies about how student deaths will be treated--for example, shrines on campus might be allowed to remain in place for three days--and treat all deaths, whether by suicide or other causes, the same. Online memorials, such as Facebook pages, deserve similar caution.

Schools should also provide accurate information to students and families about the complex causes of suicide, and consider appointing a single spokesperson to ensure a consistent message. Reducing the cause of a suicide to a single difficult event or relationship could deepen other teens' vulnerability or reinforce people's tendency to blame themselves or others. "Schools need to provide accurate information to families and students so that scapegoating is avoided," Gould says. "They need to give factual information about suicide and risk factors for it."

Distribute Reporting Guidelines to Local Media

Distribute area newspapers, television stations, and other media outlets to the AFSP's guidelines for reporting on suicide. The foundation recommends, among other steps, avoiding portrayals that romanticize the act or the victim, and avoiding detailed descriptions of the method.

Useful Resources

Consult these organizations and other resources for more information and advice about dealing with teenage suicide:
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention AFSP guidelines for the media on reporting on suicide
More Than Sad: An informational film and resource site, including a lesson plan for the film, designed to foster educational discussion with students about suicide, produced by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and the New York State Office of Mental Health. A second video, due to be released shortly, will emphasize ways that school staff can spot warning signs and provide help.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

Screening for Mental Health's SOS Signs of Suicide
Suicide Prevention Resource Center TeenScreen Schools and Communities
Grace Rubenstein is a senior producer at Edutopia.

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Suicide Prevention Can Start in School | Edutopia

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Educators should use vigilance and screening programs to make sure at-risk students get the help they need.

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This article focuses on approaches for high schools, but the information is still relevant for a middle school setting

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How Schools Cope After a Tragedy Like Suicide

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How Schools Cope After a Tragedy Like Suicide

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https://health.usnews.com/health-news/health-wellness/articles/2014/12/24/how-schools-cope-after-a-tragedy-like-suicide

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After a classmate's suicide, other students often come to school shocked and confused.

Teens congregate in the high school hallways, tears streaming. A bewildered student sits alone on the floor. Girls huddle in the restroom as rumors fly. Guidance counselors, still absorbing the news, set out to identify kids in distress. The principal braces for the onslaught of questions from parents and media. Teachers prepare for classes that will be anything but normal.

A student has just died by suicide, and now the crisis response begins.

It's called "postvention" - when crisis responders come into a school to provide support, give out factual information and address stigma after a suicide. The team monitors students and gets treatment to those who need it. Prevention of further tragedies is the goal.

"Seeing other children very upset can make you more upset," says Shelby Rowe, manager of education and prevention programs for the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention. And that, she says, can be traumatic for vulnerable kids, even if they weren't close friends with the child who died.

Contagion - a ripple effect where one suicide leads to another - is a concern. Teens ages 15 to 19 are most vulnerable - their risk of suicide after exposure to that of another person is higher than for any other age group.

Providing Help to Kids, Staff and Parents

As the former executive director of the Arkansas Crisis Center, Rowe promoted suicide awareness to counselors, teachers and nurses across the state. Her first step was debriefing counselors and their colleagues: "Just them talking about their feelings of helplessness and trauma and fear, knowing that they were the ones who the rest of the school was going to be looking toward," she says.

Next, Rowe's team met with children. "It was one on one, to give each child a chance to talk about what they were coping with," she says. The team included partners from a local mental health association. "If we felt somebody needed immediate acute care, we were equipped for that to happen." Parents received fact sheets on what to look out for in their children: Did they see healthy grieving or signs that kids needed some extra help?

Scott Poland, director of the Suicide and Violence Prevention Office at Nova Southeastern University in Fort Lauderdale, works with schools around the country following suicides and other tragedies. "Sadly, all schools are going to deal, sooner or later, with the death of a student," he says, and every school needs a response plan.

All kids need a chance to express their thoughts and emotions in small groups. "We put the desks in a circle," he says. "I'll basically say, 'I don't know much about Sheila. I've heard a few things about her, that she's a great person. What can you tell me about her?'"

He says kids have a "real need to reminisce about the deceased - they talk about where she sat in the classroom, and what she liked to do." With younger kids, poster boards and markers come in handy "to give kids a chance to draw and write and make things for the family."

A child's suicide leaves classmates shocked, confused and hurting for answers. "'Why? Why did she do this?'" is their first question, Poland says. "The answers have died with her," he tells kids. "I'm here to help you."

"How did she do it?" almost always comes next. The response is truthful and concise, Poland says: For instance, "she shot herself" is enough. "We're not going to dwell on the specifics or the details."

Suicide is caused by a variety of issues, building up over time. Untreated or undertreated mental illness is a major factor for suicide. For someone who is already struggling - with a generalized anxiety disorder, depression, family strife or substance issues - "the traumatic loss of a close friend is going to dramatically increase their risk," Rowe says.

Poland says during early intervention, responders look out for kids who appear especially emotional or distraught. "It might be kids that were angry. If we gave them an opportunity to write, we might be particularly concerned about what [a student] has written."

In those cases, he says, a teacher would arrange a one-on-one talk with the school counselor, who could call parents to discuss the situation and suggest community mental health resources.

While memorials can give kids an outlet to express their grief, extended memorials keep the focus on death, and outsized tributes may serve to glorify or glamorize suicide, experts say.

Large-scale memorial services at the school aren't helpful, Rowe says. "The school needs to be a safe place for all students, and the gym or auditorium should never be associated with the traumatic loss of your friends."

Instead, schools can use low-key ways to recognize the student's life. For instance, some teachers place a box on the child's chair and offer, "If you have a special story or a memory that you want to share with that child's family, just put it in the box," Rowe says. That encourages kids to think of good memories, and the box can become a scrapbook for the child's parents.

"A lot of schools do community walks, at a high school or a university," Rowe says. "Or do some other community activity to honor the life of that person."

Spontaneous memorials that crop up at school - collections of flowers, stuffed animals, pictures and poems - should remain only a few days after the funeral, experts advise. Poland says the important thing is "strive to treat all deaths the same, whether the death was from a car accident or a suicide."

Older kids may talk about getting involved with doing something in the student's memory, he says, like starting a chapter of Students Against Destructive Decisions. Schools may select a group of students as social media partners to keep an eye out for harmful postings and help disseminate safety-oriented messages where they'll be seen.

After a Suicide: a Toolkit for Schools, compiled by leading suicide prevention groups, was released in 2011. The toolkit offers a wealth of resources that school administrators can have in place, including facts on mental health issues and suicide risk; sample notifications and letters to parents; and guidance on memorials, social media and more. ​Parents will also find useful resources within, like how to talk to kids about suicide. For more help on working with media, school officials can share Safe Reporting on Suicide guidelines with journalists. News stories should always include the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline toll-free number: 1-800-273-TALK or 1-800-273-8255.

If your children attend a classmate's funeral, go along with them, experts recommend. You can offer support and talk about help that's available for them or their friends if ever needed.

Proactive parents can ask schools if they have mental health programs to spot depressed and suicidal teenagers ​​, Poland says. "Parents need to recognize the scope of this problem," he says. "I've had too many parents say to me, 'I just never thought it could happen to my child.'" Finally, he says, "when parents are informed that their kid needs mental health treatment, they must follow through and get that treatment for them."

Lisa Esposito, Staff Writer

Lisa Esposito has been a patient advice reporter for U.S. News since 2014, writing about medica... Read more Lisa Esposito has been a patient advice reporter for U.S. News since 2014, writing about medical and mental health conditions, healthy aging and how patients can receive better hospital care. Prior to joining U.S. News, Ms. Esposito was editor of the Health Behavior News Service, editor of the Baltimore/Washington edition of Gannett's Nursing Spectrum and a freelance editor with HealthDay News.

While at U.S. News, Ms. Esposito has appeared on panels, reported on and contributed to media guidelines on responsible suicide coverage at the U.S Department of Health and Human Services and the Pentagon. In 2016, she won a Media Orthopaedic Reporting Excellence award. Previously, Ms. Esposito worked as a registered nurse in multiple hospitals, starting at the University of Maryland Cancer Center and ending at the National Heart, Lung, and Blood Institute, part of the National Institutes of Health.

Lisa Esposito graduated with a bachelor's degree from the University of Maryland School of Nursing and a master's degree in journalism from Georgetown University. She is a member of the Association of Health Care Journalists. You can follow her on Twitter, connect with her on LinkedIn or email her at lesposito@usnews.com.

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How Schools Cope After a Tragedy Like Suicide

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The priority is keeping vulnerable kids safe.

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Prevention Programs Lower Teen Suicide Risk

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Prevention Programs Lower Teen Suicide Risk

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This story does not go into much detail about the suicide prevention plans, but the titles and brief summaries may spark ideas about the effectiveness of your own plan

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(This version of the Jan. 23rd story corrects name of the University of South Florida in paragraph 16)

By Madeline Kennedy

(Reuters Health) - After a school-based prevention program, European teenagers were about half as likely to attempt suicide or to feel suicidal, a new study shows.

Danuta Wasserman, a professor of psychiatry at the Karolinska Institute in Sweden, said the program was likely successful because students "felt that the power of mastering their feelings, coping with stress and choosing solutions was in their hands and not decided or forced by adults."

Suicide is the third leading cause of death between the ages of 10 and 24, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Suicide attempts are even more common, with some research suggesting that 4 to 8 percent of high school students try to kill themselves each year, the CDC says.

Those most at risk have a history of suicide attempts, mental illness or substance abuse, or a family history of mental illness and access to lethal methods.

In 10 European countries, Wasserman's team randomly assigned 168 high schools - with more than 11,000 students overall - to provide one of three suicide prevention programs, or no program at all.

The three programs took different approaches. One program, called Question, Persuade, and Refer, focused on training teachers and administrators to recognize kids at risk. A second, the Youth Aware of Mental Health Program, targeted all students with lectures, role-playing exercises and education about mental health and suicide risk. A third program used mental health professionals to screen at-risk pupils who were referred to them.

The researchers compared the number of suicide attempts by students as well as reports of suicidal thoughts after three months of having the programs in place, and again after a year.

At three months, none of the programs showed a significant effect. After a year, however, schools with the Youth Aware of Mental Health program had half as many suicide attempts and reports of suicidal ideation as the comparison schools with no intervention. The other two programs showed much smaller differences from the no-intervention schools.

In schools with the Youth Aware of Mental Health program, 14 students attempted suicide over the course of the year, and 15 students reported having suicidal thoughts. In the no-intervention schools, there were 34 suicide attempts and 31 reports of suicidal thoughts.

In schools with the faculty-focused program, there were 22 suicide attempts and 29 reports of suicidal thinking among students. In the program that used screening by professionals, there were 20 suicide attempts and 22 reports of suicidal thoughts.

Dr. David Brent, a child and adolescent psychiatrist at Western Psychiatric Institute and Clinic in Pittsburgh wrote an editorial on the new study in The Lancet. He told Reuters Health that education about suicide, and early detection and treatment, are two important aspects of effective prevention programs, and the Youth Aware of Mental Health program meets both standards.

Wasserman said the universal prevention model used in that program is effective because it offers treatment before students show outward signs of risk, and it does not stigmatize anyone.

Prediction is very difficult because so many suicide attempts are impulsive, Brent said in an email.

He said one weakness of the study is its exclusion of students who had recently attempted suicide, so it is unclear how well the programs would have worked for students at the highest risk.

Despite these reservations, Brent said he has faith in such programs and that "suicidal behavior is preventable in adolescents through a school-based intervention protocol."

U.S. schools offer several programs that focus on suicide prevention, he said, and the University of South Florida publishes a booklet full of resources on effective school-based suicide prevention called The Guide ( bit.ly/186FMwO).

Wasserman urges parents to advocate for programs like Youth Aware of Mental Health and to convince school authorities that "the health of young people is important."

SOURCE: bit.ly/1L3NEhX The Lancet, online January 8, 2015.

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School-wide prevention program lowers teen suicide risk

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(Reuters Health) - After a school-based prevention program, European teenagers were about half as likely to attempt suicide or to feel suicidal, a new study shows.

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http://www.supportaftersuicide.org.au/understanding-suicide-and-grief/young-people-and-grief

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Young People and Grief - Support After Suicide

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Understanding and grappling with issues related to identity, independence and peers takes on a natural urgency for young people during this time. Coming to an awareness and acceptance of one's changing body and mind and pushing the boundaries to experiment with dress, hairstyles, peer groups, drugs and alcohol are a part of working out belonging and values.

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https://www.sptsusa.org/educators/memorials-after-suicide-guidelines-for-schools-and-families/

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When a school community experiences the death of a student, there is often the very human tendency to want to do something in memory of the deceased student. These memorials can range from spontaneous tributes piled at lockers or parking spaces to more permanent, lasting tributes like placing plaques in halls or planting trees or gardens in the student's name. There may also be ceremonies or assemblies that bring together members of the school community to share memories and grieve together.

The one circumstance that may give schools pause in permitting these types of remembrances is when the death is by suicide. Currently, there is no specific research that addresses the connection between school-based memorials and copy-cat suicides or contagion. There is research however about media coverage of suicides that found that sensationalized news coverage contributed to copy-cat deaths. Experts in the field of postvention have reported anecdotal evidence to support the common-sense observation that vulnerable students who are at-risk for suicide may be affected by these memorial tributes. The distorted thinking of someone who is suicidal can be hard for those of us who have never entertained thoughts about suicide to understand. There is an irrational quality in the mental state of someone who is contemplating intentional death that overrides the intrinsic survival instinct. While the logic of dying by suicide so that the school will put up a plaque or hold an assembly to acknowledge the death is almost impossible for most of us to comprehend, it is the way suicidal students can think.

And what is even more complicating, is the fact that suicide contagion or clusters are often instigated by a death that is not a suicide. The first death or what public health officials call the 'index event' in a suicide cluster is often an accidental death. That's why it's essential that memorials to every death in a school community be handled in thoughtful ways that consider their potential impact on at-risk students.

Potentially suicidal students are not the only members of the school community who may be affected by dramatic or permanent memorials. Students who were close friends of the deceased or even faculty and staff who knew the student may be retraumatized by reminders of the death. As one educator in a school where six students had died in a six month period stated: "I would be having a good day until I saw a student wearing a tee shirt with a picture of one of those students...then all I could think about is how they weren't here anymore."

The task for schools, of course, is to develop a consistent policy that addresses all requests for memorials in the same way, regardless of the circumstances of the death. It can be a challenge to balance compassion with caution, especially in the immediate aftermath of a sudden student death. And while this topic has received an increasing amount of attention in recent years, even some of the most reputable sources provide information that is dated or somewhat inconsistent.

Here are some of the common questions raised about memorials by administrators, faculty, and students. Both the questions and the responses can provide talking points for your school and assist as you proactively craft policies, procedures and protocols that guide your school in addressing this very important topic.

What do you do about 'spontaneous' memorials?
As one of the immediate responses to the death of a peer, students may create spontaneous memorials at the locker or parking spot of the deceased. These are examples of what we call "passive grieving"- placing a picture, flower, or small object as a token of remembrance. It's important to let the students have an opportunity to express their feelings by creating these mini-shrines, but make sure your school protocols addresses the following questions:

What is the acceptable duration for these tributes?

How will you communicate that information to the students?

What will you do with the tributes after you remove them?

What alternative activity can you provide for students who need to continue to express their grief?

An idea to consider: allow the tributes until the day after the funeral. Place a note on the locker or parking spot that says something like: "We appreciate your gestures of remembrance for NAME THE STUDENT. Your tokens will remain here until the day after the funeral. They will then be collected and given to his/her family, whom we know will appreciate your kindness and compassion. (Please remember to check with the family beforehand to make sure this will be okay with them.) If you would like to share other thoughts with the family, please come to the guidance office to write your personal thoughts in a memory book."

This memory book encourages something we call 'active grieving'. It requires students to share something about the deceased - their feelings, memories, whatever! - that can actually help them more personally deal with what the death means to them. Creating this kind of memory book also serves another very important function. What a family loses when one of its members dies is not just the life of that person but any chance to ever know the ways in which the deceased interacted with people outside the family. By encouraging students to share a story about the deceased, the family is actually gifted with a memory they might never have had.

Another type of spontaneous memorial that seems to be showing up with increasing frequency is the creation of apparel like tee shirts or sweatshirts with a picture of the deceased. School officials are generally unaware that students are even planning this kind of tribute until students arrive at school wearing the shirts. For the students who create the shirts, of course, the intent is to honor their deceased peer. The last thing on their minds is the negative impact these shirts may have on other vulnerable students. In an attempt to contain these types of tributes, schools have identified the students who orchestrated the printing of the shirts, met with them and explained their inadvertent impact on other students. Students are asked not to wear the shirts to school and are invited to craft other, less dramatic ways to remember their deceased peer.

What other types of memorial activities are less appropriate?

Use this as your benchmark: if it dramatizes, sensationalizes, or glamorizes the student, or creates an opportunity for continuing attention to the death, it is probably not a good idea. Samples of inappropriate activities include:

Flying the flag at half-staff

Putting a notice on the school's outdoor message board

Letting students create and wear apparel like tee-shirts , sweatshirts or armbands

Planting trees or gardens

Placing plaques in school corridors

Naming rooms or sports venues

Creating banners

Dedicating yearbooks, dances, sporting events to the person

Making special acknowledgements at graduation ceremonies

What kinds of memorials are more appropriate'?

The benchmark here is to create a memorial that is life-affirming and encourages coping skills and resilience, especially in the face of difficult life events. Samples of these types of activities include:

Making donations to a local crisis center or other charitable organization

Collecting money to help family with funeral expenses

Participating in an event that raises awareness about suicide prevention

Buying books for the school library or hosting school programs that highlight resilience

Service projects that emphasize the importance of students taking care of each other

Service projects providing opportunities to help others

Writing notes to the family to give the 'gift of memories'

Implementing a suicide prevention program in the school

Collaborating with community agencies and groups that promote good mental health, such as the local chapter of the Mental Health Association

How can you help students or parents understand that memorials may present a potential risk to vulnerable students?

This is a really important question that should ideally be considered before a school is confronted with the fact of a student's death. Having a memorial committee that reviews all requests can be a helpful part of this process, especially if they are also able to meet with parents or students and explain the reasons behind the school's decision that reflect documented concerns about copy-cat suicides. This explanation, however, is only one part of the process. It is really important to not just discourage certain types of potentially dramatic memorials but also to encourage other memorials that emphasize life-affirming activities. It may take a little extra time to help direct parents or students to these other types of activities, but it can lessen or eliminate the contentiousness that can sometimes cloud this process when students and/or parents feel their feelings are not being considered or respected.

Another effective strategy, especially when dealing with the parents of the deceased, is to engage a survivor parent (a parent who has lost a child to suicide) to help advocate for the school's position. The survivor parent can speak with a credibility and level of understanding that comes from shared experience. Your local chapter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (afsp.org) may be helpful in identifying survivor parents to help your school with these delicate conversations.

Click to download the PDF Handout version of this resource!

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Memorials After Suicide: Guidelines for Schools and Families - SPTS

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When a school community experiences the death of a student, there is often the very human tendency to want to do something in memory of the deceased student. These memorials can range from spontaneous tributes piled at lockers or parking spaces to more permanent, lasting tributes like placing plaques in halls or planting trees or [...]

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The Fight Against Teen Suicide Begins in the Classroom

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The Fight Against Teen Suicide Begins in the Classroom

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You may not have time to watch the full video before developing your solution, but it is quite interesting and we would encourage you to take time outside of class to watch the full video

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The fight against teen suicide begins in the classroom | Brittni Darras | TEDxMileHigh

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https://www.stopbullying.gov/

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Stop Bullying on the Spot

When adults respond quickly and consistently to bullying behavior they send the message that it is not acceptable. Research shows this can stop bullying behavior over time.

Parents, school staff, and other adults in the community can help kids prevent bullying by talking about it, building a safe school environment, and creating a community-wide bullying prevention strategy.

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StopBullying.gov provides information from various government agencies on bullying, cyberbullying, prevention and response.

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https://headspace.org.au/assets/School-Support/Tips-for-teachers-following-a-suicide.pdf

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The Role of the School After a Student Suicide

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The Role of the School After a Student Suicide

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https://childmind.org/guide/helping-children-cope-grief/role-school-student-suicide/

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There are few things more upsetting to a community than when a teen takes his own life. Here are several things school officials and teachers can do in the wake of this kind of tragedy to make sure students feel supported.

Closely monitor students who are thought to be "at risk" since a depressed teen is at even greater risk of suicide after a peer commits suicide. Some teens turn to alcohol or drugs as a way of coping with this kind of tragedy. Parents should be advised to watch for unusual behavior in their teens, and teachers who suspect any risky behavior should refer those students to the school psychologist.

Talk about the suicide openly and matter-of-factly. Educators and parents should work together to convey consistent messages about the circumstances of the death and reduce confusion and misinformation. Hiding the facts of the suicide from students can result in anxiety and mistrust of the adults upon whom they should be able to rely for reassurance. Explaining the death in a matter-of-fact way can also prevent sensationalizing it.

Suicide should be explained in terms of an unrecognized or untreated mental illness. It should be explained (ideally by a professional therapist) that people with a mental illness often hide their pain even from those who are closest to them. And even if they were in treatment, some people can still die of suicide while seeing a therapist, just as some people can die of cancer even though they are seeing an oncologist.

Keep checking in with students. An event like the suicide of a classmate takes time for kids to process and the fallout - academic, social and emotional - may unfold over several months.

Some kids, whether they were close to the student who died or not, may feel guilty - as if they could or should have known something was wrong or could have done something to stop the suicide. It is important to stress that this is a common response when a death is hard to accept, but that there is nothing they could have done personally to change the situation.

Even though the person who died committed suicide, a school-wide memorial that celebrates his life is still a good idea so that his classmates can remember more than just the way he died. Students who want to should be encouraged to participate by speaking, sharing memories, making video montages, etc. It is important, however, not to go into too much detail about the death itself or to glamorize the death. Death is supposed to be scary and something we want to avoid. Talking too much about the details of a suicide can take away some of this scariness and make other students in the community more likely to consider suicide if they are already depressed.

By giving kids opportunities to share their feelings in a range of settings (both one-on-one and in a group) and by talking about the suicide openly, schools can help students put the death in perspective and heal in a healthy way.

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The Role of the School After a Student Suicide | Child Mind Institute

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What school officials and teachers can do after a suicide to make sure students feel supported. A guide to helping children cope with grief.