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Peer support group for parents and carers 

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Peer support group for parents and carers 

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Define Fine work with parents and professionals to find solutions to school attendance difficulties or barriers to education relating to SEND and physical or mental health, sometimes referred to as EBSA.

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About the Publisher

Robinson

Little, Brown is the literary hardback imprint that feeds into our Abacus paperback list. We publish across a wide range of areas, including fiction, history, memoir, science and travel, but within this diverse list the vast majority of books have in common a strong narrative and a distinctive voice.

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helping your child with fears and worries

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Helping Your Child With Fears and Worries

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Does your child suffer from fears and worries that affect their behaviour or keep them awake at night? Fears and worries are very common among children with aro

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Advice for parents and carers to help keep children safe from bullying, wherever it happens.

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Tips to help parents/carers support children's mental health 

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Tips to help parents/carers support children's mental health 

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Supporting people across all ages to improve sleep, and provides sleep training to professionals in the health, social and corporate sectors.

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Free resources for Child's Mental Health week

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Free resources for Child's Mental Health week

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All our free, official Children's Mental Health Week resources are on this page. We have lots of ideas and inspiration for you, from class activities and assemblies for schools, to top tips and creativity for families, to fundraising guides, plus bonus materials.

Take a look at our official:

resources for schools, including assembly slides, class activities, bonus Inside Out activities, and lots of top tips

fundraising resources, including a fundraising guide, fundraising ideas, and bonus materials like posters and bunting

resources for families, including top tips for families, and a creative activity from Place2Be's Art Room team.

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Resources and activities for Children's Mental Health Week

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Take a look at all our resources activities for schools and families, created with Here4You supported by The Walt Disney Company, as well as resources to help you fundraise and take part in the week!

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Nip in the Bud - Tips for parents & carers 

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Nip in the Bud - Tips for parents & carers 

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Tips for Parents & Carers: School Phobia or EBSA

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Emotionally based school avoidance and autism 

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Emotionally based school avoidance and autism 

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Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA) & Autism Spectrum Condition

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Information and advice for parents and carers 

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Information and advice for parents and carers 

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What is Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA)?

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Self-referral quick guide for Luton CYP 

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Self-referral quick guide for Luton CYP 

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Luton Public Health -map of mental health and well-being services for CYP

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Luton Public Health -map of mental health and well-being services for CYP

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Navigating Education and Working Well with School 

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Navigating Education and Working Well with School 

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Log in to Autism Central to watch this series of videos

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Navigating education and working well with school | Autism Central

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The series of seven webinars, with Dr Naomi Fisher and Eliza Fricker, is for parents and carers to understand more about navigating education and working well with school.​

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EBSA/EBSNA  is a broad umbrella term used to describe a group of children and young people who struggle to engage with and/or attend a school setting due to emotional and systemic factors. In Luton, discussion with young people indicated preference for the term ‘avoidance,’ rather than ‘non-attendance’ 

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EBSA/EBSNA  is a broad umbrella term used to describe a group of children and young people who struggle to engage with and/or attend a school setting due to emotional and systemic factors. In Luton, discussion with young people indicated preference for the term ‘avoidance,’ rather than ‘non-attendance’ 

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EBSA often leads to prolonged absences, difficulty to attend school and/or remain in lessons for an entire day. Some demonstrate inconsistent attendance, whilst others can attend and engage successfully with modified timetables and high levels of support.

It is well recognised from previous research that EBSA is caused by a complex number of factors linked to child, family context and school factors. In Luton, we recognise EBSA to include both engagement with learning and education as a whole.

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Children's mental health - Every Mind Matters

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Children's mental health - Every Mind Matters

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Children’s mental health - Every Mind Matters

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See tips and advice for parents and carers on how to support children and young people’s mental wellbeing, and give them the best chance to stay healthy.

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The decision-making profile creates a clear picture about how a person makes a decision and how they want to be supported in decision-making. Designed by National Development Team for Inclusion

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This tool helps people to sort out what is working and what is not working from different perspectives. Developed by the National Development Team for Inclusion

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Information about the Education, Health and Care Plan.

Not every pupil with special educational needs or disabilities requires an EHC plan. Have a look here to find out more.

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What is an EHC plan?

An EHC plan is a legal document that describes a child or young person's special educational, health and social care needs. It explains the extra help that will be given to meet those needs, and how that will support the child or young person to achieve what they want in their life.

EHC plans are for children and young people whose special educational needs require more help than would normally be provided in a mainstream education setting (college, school, nursery).

Although the plan can include health or social care needs, your child will not get a plan if they only have health or social care needs, that do not affect their education.

An EHC plan can be issued to a child or young person between the ages of 0 and 25 years.

EHC plans are drawn up by the Local Authority after an EHC Needs Assessment. A child's education setting, parent or carer, or your child, if over 16, can ask your Local Authority to carry out an assessment.

For further information or advice on EHC Needs Assessment requests click here or alternatively contact Luton SENDIAS service and a member of the team can talk you through the request process.

What does an EHC plan/draft EHC plan look like?

There is no national standard format for the EHC plan. However it must have certain sections that are clearly labelled.

The sections are:

A: The views, interests and aspirations of you and your child.
B: Special educational needs (SEN).
C: Health needs related to SEN.
D: Social care needs related to SEN.
E: Outcomes - how the extra help will benefit your child
F: Special educational provision (support).
G: Health provision.
H: Social care provision.
I: Placement - type and name of school or other institution (blank in the draft plan)
J: Personal budget arrangements.
K: Advice and information - a list of the information gathered during the EHC Needs Assessment.

The different sections, may at first seem like a confusing alphabet soup. It can help to understand that there are three sections on needs (i.e. your child's difficulties) that are matched by corresponding provision (the help your child will get) to meet those needs:

The sections are:

"Section B: Special Educational Needs" are met by "Section F: Special Educational Provision".

"Section C: Health care needs" are met by "Section G: Health care Provision".

"Section D: Social care needs" are met by "Section H: Social care Provision".

Can I learn more about the different sections of the EHCP?

Section A can be useful in providing a quick summary of your child. It should be based on information given by you and your child or young person. Section A is not legally binding, so the main detail of the plan should not be in here.

Section B describes your child's special educational needs i.e. what your child has difficulty with. The SEND code of practice defines four broad areas of SEN. Many Local Authorities structure the educational sections of the EHC plan in this way, but there is no obligation to do so. These areas are:

Cognition and learning.

Communication and interaction.

Social emotional and mental health.

Sensory and physical.

Section C contains any health care needs relating to your child's condition or SEN. This can be physical or mental health difficulties, for example difficulties with eating, severe anxiety, or a medical condition such as Epilepsy.

Section D contains any social care needs relating to your child's special educational needs or disability. For example, support to join in with activities outside home and school.

Section E contains the outcomes anticipated for your child. The outcomes describe what your child will be able to do as a result of getting the extra help in the EHC plan. Outcomes can be about reaching a particular educational level, or they can be things that are important to your child, such as being able to take part in an out of school activity.

Section F contains details of the help your child will get in school. This section must be specific and quantified. It should be very clear how much help, how often, and who will give it. Therapies such as speech and language must normally be in section F.

Section G is the healthcare provision required. For example, medication, equipment (such as a wheelchair), nursing support, monitoring seizures etc.

Section H is social care provision. This might be short breaks, out of school activities or support for the family at home.

Section I names the school or other institutions your child attends. In a draft EHC plan, this must always be left blank, because this is when you can tell your Local Authority what school you want your child to go to.

Section J If you have requested a personal budget, Section J will contain information about this. A personal budget is not extra money, but a more flexible way of using the funding allocated to your child. See our separate information on personal budgets.

Section K contains all the reports gathered as part of the assessment process.

How long does the plan last?

The plan will remain in place until your child leaves education or the Local Authority decides that your child no longer needs the plan to help them in their education. If you move to another Local Authority, the plan will be transferred. See more about a change in circumstances.

Annual review of the plan

If a child or young person has an Education, Health and Care Plan (EHCP) the Local Authority (LA) must review the EHCP at least once a year.

The Review must focus on progress towards achieving the outcomes or goals set out in their EHCP and:

From year 9, focus on preparing for adulthood

For children under 5, the review should take place every 3-6 months

Reviews must take into account the views, wishes and feelings of children, young people and parents. If there's any concern about progress, the review may be brought forward.

Below are some FAQ's that explain further about the Annual Review of an ECHP. Alternatively, you can contact the service directly to ask questions or seek support at a meeting.

Why does there need to be an Annual Review?

An Annual Review is held to consider if the outcomes or targets have been achieved. New outcomes and provision can be set if needed, and aspirations changed.

The purpose of the meeting is to review the EHCP by:

* Bringing together all those involved in helping achieve the outcomes set out in the plan

* Gathering and considering information so that it can be used to support future progress
* Reviewing the effectiveness of any special educational, health or social care provision made for a child/YP
* Considering whether any changes need to be made to the EHCP including medium and long term outcomes
* Considering whether an EHCP should continue

What happens at the review meeting?

The review meeting must focus on progress made towards achieving the outcomes set out in the EHCP. The EHCP must be looked at to see if it still meets the needs. The meeting will usually include the following:

* The extent to which the outcomes (goals) in the EHCP, or those agreed at the previous annual review, have been met
* Medium and long term outcomes for the next year
* Planning the support from school/college and other people to help achieve these objectives
* Any further action required, and who will be responsible for this
* Whether the EHCP needs amending or is no longer required
* If you do not agree with what is being suggested at the meeting, try to make that clear and write to your SENAT Officer at the LA
* Review or request a personal budget
* For young people over 18, the Local Authority must consider if the training or educational outcomes have been achieved
* From year 9 onwards, there must be a focus on preparing for Adulthood

Within two weeks, the school must prepare a report of the meeting and send it to everyone invited. The report must set out recommendations on any amendments or changes required to the EHCP, and should refer to any differences between the school's recommendations and those of others attending the meeting.

Within four weeks of the meeting, the Local Authority must let you know their decision and decide whether to:
* Keep the EHCP as it is

* Amend or change it

* Cease to maintain it,

SENAT must let you know of their decision. Their letter must also tell you about your right to appeal that decision and the time limits for doing so.

* The requirement for you to consider mediation should you wish to appeal
* Contact information for disagreement resolution, and advice and support from us at Luton SENDIAS Service

This is the end of the annual review process.

What happens when the Local Authority propose to amend the EHCP?

The Local Authority must send you a copy of your child's existing EHCP saying what they are going to change. They must also send you any supporting evidence or information these changes come from.

* You have 15 days to consider and make comments on these changes. You can ask for a meeting with your SENAT Officer to discuss it if you are not happy - they may be able to make changes. You can ask that a particular school be named in the EHCP

* If the Local Authority decides to go ahead with making amendments. they must issue an amended EHCP within 8 weeks of the original notice. This should clearly show which parts have been amended, include the minutes of the Annual Review meeting and any relevant reports should be attached

* If the Local Authority decides not to make the changes or amendments, they must inform you, giving reasons, within 8 weeks

* The Local Authority must tell you about your right to appeal

What is a Transition Plan?
Annual Reviews from Year 9 (Age 14) onwards
From Year 9 onwards, Annual Reviews must include a focus on preparing for adulthood including employment, independent living and participation in society.

When a child is in Year 9, a transition plan will be drawn up as part of the Annual Review.

The plan helps children and YP think about their future including GCSE options or alternatives and what they would like to do once they are 16 and beyond. This transition plan also looks at the child's/YP's aspirations and needs as adult life approaches, and must be built into the EHCP. The transition plan is updated at each annual review meeting until they are 25 (if they still have an EHCP).
The review must include:
* Higher education and/or employment - exploring different employment options, such as support for becoming self-employed and help from supported employment agencies

* Independent living - young people having choice, freedom and control over their lives, their support, and their accommodation and living arrangements, including supported living

* Participating in society - having friends and supportive relationships, and participating in and contributing to the local community

* Being as healthy as possible in adult life

* The school who will provide information about the learning programme of support. Schools also have a duty to provide independent and impartial careers guidance for children and young people.

* Children and YP will be able to say what they feel their needs are and what they would like to do after leaving school. Their views, wishes and feelings should be recorded.

* Parents and family will be able to give their views on what they would like for the child/YP after they leave school. They can also discuss what practical help may be needed, and how they can support them in developing their personal and social skills needed in adult life, including the possibility of a personal budget.

* Social Care, so that arrangements can be made for any assessment under the Disabled Persons Act 1986 and/or the Care Act 2014.

* Health Service, who will provide advice on the services that are likely to be required.

* A Post-16 institution representative should be invited, especially if your child/YP has expressed a desire to attend a particular college.

Who will be involved?

All 16-19 year old YP will be expected, but not required, to be in some form of education or training, full or part time. This can continue until the age of 25 for those with an EHCP and should continue to address their needs and aspirations.

This does not mean YP have to stay at school. They could:

* Attend full or part time education at college

* Take up an apprenticeship

* Take a Traineeship or Supported Internship, which involves work experience and study

* Go to work (The ECHP will then cease)

There are helpful booklets and information about preparing for adult life on the SENDIAS website and also on the SEND Luton local Offer website: https://directory.luton.gov.uk/kb5/luton/directory/localoffer.page

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What is an EHC plan? An EHC plan is a legal document that describes a child or young person's special educational, health and social care needs. It explains the extra help that will be given to meet those needs, and...

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How to Print or Download Documents from the Padlet

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How to Print or Download Documents from the Padlet

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A simple tool for gathering the child/young person's views

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It's normal for children and young people to feel worried about something that's happening at school - for example, when starting a new school or during exams. Sometimes, however, school can become challenging, stressful or distressing over a much longer period of time.

If your child is feeling anxious about school, or not able to go, it can be exhausting for both of you. Mornings in particular can become really stressful for the whole family, as you try to juggle your child's feelings alongside the need to get them to school and get on with your other responsibilities such as work. Even if you manage to get your child to the school gate, you might know how difficult they're going to find the day - or know that you'll be facing the same problem tomorrow morning.

If you're in this situation, we've got advice to help you explore what's going on with your child, make changes at school that can help, and find the support you need if your child can't go to school.

Young people can feel anxious about school for lots of different reasons. They might be worried about making friends or fitting in, find schoolwork or lessons confusing, feel pressured to learn in a certain way or find their relationships with teachers difficult.

Sometimes, going through difficult experiences outside of school - such as bereavement, an illness in the family or being a young carer - can also make it harder for a child to feel settled at school.

For some young people, the school environment isn't right for them, and trying to fit into it can create a huge amount of stress. This might be the case if they are struggling with their mental health, or have a neurodiverse condition or Special Educational Need (SEN) such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia or dyspraxia. This can make the school environment anxiety-provoking and exhausting, especially if their condition or need is undiagnosed or not being well supported.

Young people might show they're feeling anxious about school by:

not wanting to get up and get ready

saying they can't go

worrying a lot about small issues, such as having the right equipment for a lesson

feeling sick, or having stomach aches or headaches

not sleeping well

not doing schoolwork, or their grades dropping

being angry or upset, or acting out - at school or at home

withdrawing - seeming low, quiet or depressed

It's often difficult for your child to articulate the problem. They may be in a heightened state of stress and not know why or feel able to explain. Your child probably wants to feel able to be in school, just as much as you want them to be there. In many cases it just doesn't feel possible.

Sometimes it can be difficult to work out what's making your child feel anxious, and the first step is often helping them to identify exactly what's worrying them. Once you understand the problem, you'll be in a much better position to make changes that can help.

Young people can find it hard to explain what's causing their feelings, and might not be able to answer direct questions like 'what's going on?' Using an anxiety iceberg can help to open up the conversation - giving you a more relaxed way of exploring together what's causing their anxiety.

Watch our video to find out how to make an anxiety iceberg with your child.

If you're making an anxiety iceberg with younger children, you might want to draw images on the iceberg, or encourage them to write simple words. With older children and teenagers, you can ask them to write key words and phrases on the iceberg, or do this as a mind map, with 'school' in the middle and all the things they're finding difficult around the outside.

Through this exercise, you might identify worries such as arriving at school, finding the environment noisy or overwhelming, finding lessons confusing, feeling lonely through the day, or feeling uncomfortable during specific subjects.

Once you understand what's going on for your child, you can use their anxiety iceberg or mind map to communicate with the school and ask for specific changes.

Follow these steps to start a conversation with the school:

Here are some examples of things you can ask the school for:

Remember that even though this situation can be really tough for you and your child, it's a good idea to maintain a positive relationship with the school. Recognise the support they're offering and any changes they're making. This will help you work together to make things better for your child.

Building a relationship with the attendance team at my son's school was hugely helpful, we were talking with them each day.

If your child isn't going to school at the moment, it might feel incredibly stressful and tiring. You might be worried about when they will be able to get back to school or the impact on their education. Or you might feel overwhelmed because you're juggling this alongside work and other family commitments. Things are probably feeling tough for your child too.

During this time, it's important to keep working with teachers and other staff to try strategies that can help your child get back to school. Keep encouraging them to take achievable steps towards attending too. When the right support is in place, it's often easier for a young person to get back into their usual routine if they can return to school as quickly as possible.

If your child's anxiety about school has built up to the point where they can't go, it's a good idea to get them some professional mental health or SEN support. Find out how to do this further down the page.

Alongside requesting professional help, try to:

The school's SEN and attendance policies should be on their website. Knowing what these are can support you during meetings with the school.

This can help if your child is unable to go to school for a longer period of time and you need to ask for more support, including provision of alternative full-time education.

Encourage your child to get up, do some studying and stop for lunch at the same times they would if they were in school. This will make adapting back to school easier. Explain to your child that if they cannot go to school, they will need to study at home - at least until alternative arrangements are put in place. Ask the school to help you facilitate tasks and activities your child can do and use online resources such as BBC Bitesize.

Not going to school could leave your child feeling really isolated. Make sure they stay connected to the outside world by seeing friends and family, doing activities they enjoy and getting outside for walks and exercise.

Speaking to friends online can be really important if your child is feeling isolated at home. Sometimes, however, you might notice that your child is spending lots of time gaming or on their phone, and that this is getting in the way of important daily activities like spending quality time with family, learning, or sleeping and eating well. If this is becoming a problem, have a look at our guide to gaming or guide to social media for more information and advice.

Local authorities must provide alternative education if a child of compulsory school age is unable to attend school over a longer period of time. If your child cannot attend school because of a mental or physical health issue, the local authority should provide an alternative as soon as it is clear that they will be away from school for more than 15 days (either consecutively or over time). Find out how to request alternative education.

Getting back to school after weeks or months may feel extremely difficult for your child, but you and the school can help make it more manageable. Here are some things you can do to help:

Set small, achievable targets, such as visiting the building outside school hours or attending one lesson.

Request a home visit from a school staff member so your child can check in while feeling safe, see that the school cares and discuss any strategies that might help them.

Ask for a reduced timetable, with regular reviews to discuss building back up at a manageable rate.

Discuss changing classes or sets if your child thinks this would help.

Focus on qualifications needed for what your child wants to do next, perhaps dropping a less relevant GCSE to reduce stress.

My son wasn't questioned about his absence when he did feel able to pop in for favourite lessons, helping to ease him back into full days of education.

If your child is struggling with anxiety and it's affecting their day-to-day life, learning or relationships, it's a good idea to find some professional support. Speaking to the GP and finding them a counsellor or therapist are two good places to start. You can find more information about GPs, counsellors and other mental health services in our guide to getting support from mental health services.

If there is no other obvious reason for your child's inability to attend school, they may have an undiagnosed Special Educational Need (SEN) such as dyslexia, autism or ADHD.

If you think this is the case:

Speak to the school's SENCO or your GP to ask for a referral for an assessment.

While you are waiting for an assessment, you can also ask the SENCO to refer your child for support from other professionals, such as an Educational Psychologist or Speech and Language Therapist. These professionals can identify specific needs and make recommendations for additional support the school can put in place - even if your child hasn't had a formal diagnosis yet.

SEN support at school
If your child is diagnosed with SEN, extra support and adjustments should be put in place at school to help them attend and learn. This is called SEN support, and should be available within the school's existing resources. Speak to the school's SENCO in the first instance about how the school will support your child.
Education, Health and Care (EHC) plans
If you do not think your child's needs can be met by the school's existing resources, you can ask the local authority to carry out an Education, Health and Care needs assessment (EHC needs assessment). If the local authority decides your child needs additional support, they will then make an Education, Health and Care plan (EHC plan). This outlines how the extra support they need will be provided. Find out more about EHC plans.
Your Local Offer
Your Local Offer is the information, support and services available for young people with SEN, and for their parents and families. You can find out what support is available in your area by going to your local authority's website and searching for their Local Offer.

While we take care to ensure that the organisations we signpost to provide high quality information and advice, we cannot take responsibility for any specific pieces of advice they may offer. We encourage parents and carers to always explore the website of a linked service or organisation to understand who they are and what support they offer before engaging with them.

We have more tips and advice on supporting your child with school, and information about how you can get in touch with our Parents Helpline.
This page was reviewed in December 2022. It was created with parents and carers with lived experience of supporting their child or young person with school anxiety. We will next review the page in 2025. YoungMinds is a proud member of PIF TICK - the UK's quality mark for trusted health information.
Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.

Please be aware that this form isn't a mental health support service. If your child is in crisis right now and you want to talk to someone urgently, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.

At YoungMinds we take your privacy seriously. If you'd like to read more about how we keep the information we collect safe, take a look at our privacy policy.

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School Anxiety and Refusal | Parent Guide to Support

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If your child is anxious about school, or refusing to go to school at all, read our tips and advice on how you can support their mental health.

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It is important that the child's 'voice' is always heard at meetings and that their views are represented. This resource is one way that parents can use to support their child to do this.

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DOWNLOAD | All About Me! Resource to Support Child-Centred Meetings

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This download is designed to help you take a child-led strengths-based approach when holding meetings about / with a child.

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What to do if your child won't go to school - advice for parents 

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What to do if your child won't go to school - advice for parents 

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Some autistic children find the demands of school, and the school environment, almost unbearable, leading to absence or 'school refusal'. It's a term that some people feel unfairly implies the child or young person has a choice, when in fact they may not be simply unwilling, but actually unable to tolerate school.

School absence or refusal can be ongoing until the reasons behind it have been identified and addressed. Here we look at reasons that could be behind this. We also suggest strategies to try at home and school to help maintain school attendance or reintegrate your child back into school.

What are the added pressures of the school environment?

Autistic children and young people can face additional pressure at school. For example, they may:

lack the complex social skills that come naturally to others, struggle to make and keep friends or might experience bullying

have difficulty coping with the curriculum. This could be because they have difficulty processing information and understanding questions and text

struggle to cope with the demands of a school timetable because they have difficulty organising and prioritising

experience sensory differences which can make it hard to tolerate some aspects of the school environment, like noises, smells and lighting

strive for perfection in their work and see anything less as a failure

get into trouble with teachers for unintentionally being rude, inappropriate or not respecting authority

take things literally, which might mean that they misunderstand a teacher's instructions, or aren't able to join in with classroom jokes

find sudden changes to their routine difficult

find transitions difficult, like moving classroom or changing teacher

find that unstructured time, like breaks and lunchtime, cause anxiety at school

experience difficulty with a particular subject or member of staff

struggle with anxiety and find it hard to be apart from family, or away from the familiar routines of home.

Parents have a legal duty to make sure that their children have a suitable education by regular attendance at school, or otherwise. If your child is unwell due to stress or any other condition that means they'll be absent for longer than a few days, you should get a medical certificate from a health professional. If your GP can't provide this, you may need to approach another health professional, like someone from  Child Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS). You should also let the school and the local/education authority know and discuss arrangements for alternative education.

How can I find out why my child's refusing school?

Explore what your child thinks about their experiences at school. For example, rather than ask how their day has been, which could be answered by an ambiguous 'OK', ask what their favourite lesson was that day. You could also ask them to score parts of their day. For example, 'how much did you enjoy playtime today with a score of one of ten'. And follow up, 'that's a lower score than yesterday. What made you enjoy it less? Visual supports may help.

Consider whether there could be a pattern to their absences. Are they trying to avoid a particular situation, lesson or person that makes them anxious?

Speak to a member of staff at school who knows your child well, and ask for their help. Your child may be showing signs of anxiety in school at particular times.

Alternatively, your child may display different behaviour at home than in school. They might bottle up their emotions until the end of the school day and release them when they're at home, where they feel fully loved and accepted.

Understanding your child's behaviour may be difficult. You may find our information on behaviour helps.

Consider whether your child is being bullied, or if they could be misinterpreting the actions and intentions of others as hostile when they're not.

Consider gender issues. For example, autism may present differently in girls. For children who don't use verbal or written communication, schools should consider:

the views of parents, carers and others who know them well

a behaviour diary

a home/school communication book.

Strategies you could try at home

If your child becomes reluctant to go to school, it's important to take action early. Some of these strategies may help:

Encourage them to communicate with you about the problem. Using visual supports may help. Ask your child to rate events or places at school on a scale from 'not scary' to 'very scary'. This may help you to see when and where the problems occur and help build your child's resilience.

If you have an understanding of the reasons behind their reluctance, share it with school staff.

Create a 'worry book' for your child to record their anxiety during the school day. If appropriate, read the book together as part of their evening routine. You can then help them deal with any worries by suggesting how to cope with them in the future.

Identify strategies to regulate, reduce and monitor emotions and reduce stress, for example exercise, visual stress scales such as a stress thermometer or traffic light system.

Reward and praise any progress on specific tasks, like completing something they find difficult, putting on their school uniform or walking past school.

Provide structure at home by using visual supports.

Try to help them develop their social skills.

Help your child to understand the benefits of education.

Strategies to discuss with the school

The help your child needs will depend upon the causes of their anxiety. For example, there may be a specific problem which requires immediate action from school, like bullying.

Here are some other triggers and strategies to consider:

School environment. Many autistic children and young people have sensory differences. There are specific strategies that can help with this, like providing a calm and quiet place, a suitable workspace or wearing ear defenders. They may need support from an occupational therapist to help identify and manage sensory issues.

Does your child need more, or different support at school? They may need help with transitioning between lessons, or might benefit from specialist input from a speech and language therapist to help them understand social situations.

Use the understanding you have of your child to identify coping strategies that can be used in school. Discuss these with the person responsible for special educational needs (SEN) or additional support needs (ASN). This could be something like time out cards, stress scales or other interventions.

Ask the school to make reasonable adjustments at the start and end of the school day. For example, your child could be met at the school entrance by a member of staff they feel comfortable with, be given time to engage in hobbies/interests, or be allowed to leave before other pupils.

Ask the school to consider extra breaks for your child during the school day. Perhaps they could be redirected to a different activity, have a quick run outside, or retreat to a quieter area of the school.

Your child might like the opportunity to discuss their feelings at the end of each school day. Ask your child's teacher or support assistant to go through the timetable with them and ask them to mark each lesson out of ten. For those lessons they score low, ask them why.

Suggest to school that they use your child's interest to help them learn. For example, if your child is interested in dinosaurs perhaps a lesson to count could involve counting dinosaurs. Talking about their interest can help to bring them into conversations and build positive relationships with staff.

Ask the school if there are ways they can reward your child for small improvements in achievement.

When supporting your child in going back to school after a period of absence, it may help to start off on a part-time timetable and build up gradually. This can be better than your child feeling pressured to complete a whole day, and then not coping.

Increasing the school's autism awareness

Ask the school if they'll consider organising autism awareness training for all staff, including break and lunchtime support supervisors.

It could also help if the school creates opportunities for all pupils to develop an understanding of medical conditions, SEN or ASN and disabilities. This could be a school assembly where information on many additional needs, including autism, can be presented without highlighting any particular pupil. This will help others to view autism in a positive way and is likely to benefit everyone in the school community. It might help not only your child, but also other autistic children and young people at the school.

Teachers working with autistic children and young people may find it helpful to sign up for our Autism practice - education: a monthly newsletter for teachers and education professionals (both mainstream and specialist).

Returning to school

Schools should try to identify and address sources of stress and reduce anxiety levels. This will help your child re-engage with their education by feeling safe in the classroom and accepted by those who support them.

Any period of transition, including returning to school, can cause anxiety so careful preparation will be needed to help your child manage this change.

Involve them in the process and arrangements, including details that might seem trivial, such as:

which room they'll go to first

what time they'll go there

how long they'll be there

why they'll be there

what will happen next.

A visual timetable may help

Before your child can access learning, work may need to be done on their emotional wellbeing, reducing stress and increasing self-confidence.
What if this doesn't resolve the problem?
If you feel your child needs more support to help them return to school and progress, you should consider getting extra help for them in school.

If anxiety or other mental health conditions are contributing to your child's difficulty with attending school, ask your GP to make a referral to CAMHS. They have a team that can advise you on psychiatry, clinical psychology, counselling and other therapies.

The school could involve the Education Welfare Officer. It's their job to work with schools, pupils and families to support regular school attendance.

If your child continues to struggle to attend school, you may decide to choose a different school or consider home education.

Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)

If your child has a profile of pathological demand avoidance (PDA) then talk to school about appropriate interventions. The standard ones used for autistic children and young people will need to be adapted to take your child's PDA into account.

The PDA Society has useful information (see our useful resources below). You could also suggest that school staff read more about helping children with PDA at school.

Useful resources

You might find this PDF, from the Autism Education Trust, useful:  School stress and anxiety - how it can lead to school refusal and impact on family life.

You may like to suggest to your child's school that to help other pupils learn about autism, the school could use the National Autistic Society's learning resources for schools and the Autism Education Trust's guide Promoting autism inclusive attitudes.

The PDA Society has useful information for  families and carers, along with educational and handling guidelines for  education settings.

If you need to find local autism services (schools, counsellors, local groups, diagnostic services) in your area, you can search on our Autism Services Directory - please browse by categories and refine by your local area.

Our online community is a place for autistic people and their families to meet like-minded people and share their thoughts and experiences.
Find your local branch
We have 117 local branches led by amazing volunteers. They are places to meet other autistic people and their families and to find out what's going on in your area

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A guide for parents or carers of autistic children with advice on how to help your child go to school.

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Topics mentioned: autism and mental health, friends

Author: Polly, 17
About: Polly explains her journey to a diagnosis of autism and shares tips for how to look after your mental health at school if you are autistic.
School can be a challenging place to manage for most people, and when you're autistic it can be even harder. Growing up I always felt different, like an outsider; I didn't understand imaginary games, I would get so confused when someone would tell me to do one thing but expect something entirely different, and the fire alarm would physically hurt and make my arms prickle.

In secondary school this got worse - everywhere was so big and noisy, friendships got more confusing and people started dating. I loved the routine of school, and the learning, but I couldn't manage everything else. In Year 8, I would hide in the history cupboard because it was quiet, small and dark - in my mind, safe.

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Surviving School On The Autistic Spectrum | Blog

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Topics mentioned: autism and mental health, friends Author: Polly, 17 About: Polly explains her journey to a diagnosis of autism and shares tips for how to look after your mental health at school if you are autistic. School can be a challenging place to manage for most people, and when you're autistic it can be even harder.

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Advice for parents & carers on school meetings 

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Advice for parents & carers on school meetings 

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PRINTABLE version

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EBSA resources - Advice for parents_carers for school meetings

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Advice for parents & carers on school meetings 

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Advice for parents & carers on school meetings 

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EBSA school meetings advicefor parents_carers

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Under construction

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Range of short helpful videos to support with emotional needs

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Ambitious about Autism is the national charity for autistic children and young people. We stand with autistic children, young people and their families to champion rights, campaign for change and create opportunities.

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Parents/carers often find it helpful to keep a log of contact with school staff and other professionals involved so that all the information is in one place for meetings etc.

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NHS advice

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Extract from 'Working Together to Improve School Attendance' relating to register codes and medical evidence 

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Extract from 'Working Together to Improve School Attendance' relating to register codes and medical evidence 

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Code I: Illness (not medical or dental appointment)

362. The pupil is unable to attend due to illness (both physical and mental health related). Schools should advise parents to notify them on the first day the child is unable to attend due to illness.

363. Schools are not expected to routinely request that parents provide medical evidence to support illness absences. Schools should only request reasonable medical evidence in cases where they need clarification to accurately record absence in the attendance register – i.e. making a decision that code I is the absence code that accurately describes the reason the pupil is not in school for the session in question. In the majority of cases a parent’s notification that their child is too ill to attend school will be that evidence and can be accepted without question or concern. Only where the school has genuine and reasonable doubt about the authenticity of the illness should medical evidence be requested to support the absence.

364. Where medical evidence is deemed necessary, school should not be rigid about the form of evidence requested and should speak to the family about what evidence is available. Schools should be mindful that requesting additional medical evidence unnecessarily places pressure on health professionals, their staff and their appointment system, particularly if the illness is one that does not require treatment by a health professional. Where a parent cannot provide evidence in the form requested but can provide other evidence, schools should take this into account. Where a parent cannot provide any written evidence the school should have a conversation with the parent and pupil, if appropriate, which may in itself serve as the necessary evidence to record the absence.

365. This code is classified for statistical purposes as authorised absence.

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Ways to put yourself first

Give yourself permission

It is very easy, as a parent or carer, to prioritise the needs of your family and others ahead of your own wellbeing. But taking time for yourself is not selfish. Everybody needs space to unwind and relax, and giving yourself permission to take some time to recharge your batteries means that you will hopefully have more energy and patience to meet the needs of your family. Start by trying to give yourself 10 minutes each day where you can just sit down, have a cup of tea and take a breather.'

You often get told to give some time for yourself. This doesn't need to be outside of the house. You can do this however you want, even if its going to the next room and eating some chocolate. '

Be kind to yourself

If you're looking at this page there's a pretty good chance you're struggling at the moment. It may be that you also feel bad about yourself and feel as if you're failing. If this is happening it can help to have a think about how you 'talk' to yourself. We're sometimes much harder on ourselves in our own thoughts than we would be to anyone else we speak to. Imagine that it's a friend who's in your situation right now instead of you. How would you comfort them? How would you encourage them? Can you speak encouragingly to yourself too?
'When things aren't going well, I often blame myself. I'm learning to notice when I do it and to try to be kind and gentle with myself. I tell myself I'm doing my best instead of that I'm failing.'
Ways to get things done

Make a to-do list

At times you might find that your 'list of things to do' can build up. This could be general errands, shopping for vital items, or general admin. If these tasks are weighing on your mind compile a to-do list that you can tick off as you go along prioritising those activities which need to be done that day or week. This includes setting aside quality time with your children and time for yourself. Just seeing everything written down may help make things seem more manageable and identify things which really aren't urgent. And remember it is fine and healthy to sometimes have a downday.
'I've had to learn how to not feel guilty about not getting everything I wanted to get done. A mixture of self-compassion and having realistic expectations to begin with.'
Ask for help

Asking for help from others can sometimes feel as if we're failing as a parent or carer but parenting can be tough and reaching out for support is nothing to feel ashamed of. Whether it's minding your child for a short time to allow you to get things done or running a small errand for you, friends and family will often be happy to help and children and young people can also benefit from knowing there are other trusted adults in their life that your family can turn to. Depending on the age of the child, you can also ask them to complete age-appropriate tasks to help around the house to relieve you of some of the everyday tasks.
'It's so important to take help where you can. Try to be specific about the help you need and when you need it as this will often help others know what is required and how they can help.'
Ways to look after yourself

Maintain energy levels
'Making time to exercise is really important even if its just walking around the block with your baby in a pram.' 'My partner would often have to work late so every now and again I would ask a friend to babysit whilst I slept upstairs knowing my children were safe and entertained downstairs.'
Looking after your physical health can have a positive impact on your mental and emotional wellbeing. A healthy and balanced diet can help how you feel physically and avoiding certain foods can help if you're feeling low or anxious. Regular exercise doesn't need to mean running 5ks but may include regular walks,

or visualisation.

Prioritise sleep
'It's important to have your own voice and to not let others tell you what you should be doing or what you need.'
Balanced sleep is really important for good mental health but it can also be a really useful self-care tool for when you need a break to get away from your thoughts or situation for a bit. Trying to establish good sleep routines for your children can be the first step to giving you time at night to relax and allow you to get a good night sleep for yourself. This may be harder with babies and infants but even with older children you may benefit from allowing yourself a power nap in the daytime whilst they are at school.

Ways to stay connected
'As much as I love my phone and everything I use it for, I feel like I'd be much less anxious without it.'
Check in with friends

Maintaining good relationships with friends and family is one of the most important factors in maintaining good mental health. New 'parent friends' can be great for both you and your children but sometimes old friends are the only ones who you can really confide in, have a laugh with, and make you feel better about yourself. Of course, meeting face-to-face may not always be possible but scheduling a regular call once your children are in bed or doing their homework can make all the difference.
'Doing something that I love and that I've loved since before I had children helps me to feel energised and more 'myself'. It's good to remember who I am outside of being a parent.'
Say 'no' to things

Often when we're struggling, it may feel hard to balance how we're feeling with the expectations that may be placed on us by ourselves or our family. There is lots of advice about setting healthy boundaries and interpersonal effectiveness worksheets online which can help you communicate your needs without seeming aggressive or feeling guilty about neglecting the needs of others. Remember you have the right to say yes or no without having to explain your reasons.

Ways to create free time in your diary

Sometimes a 24/7 engagement with instant messaging and social media can feel a bit relentless and stressful. Some people say they stay on devices out of habit. Just as you might limit your children's time on devices, try to set a time when you will put the phone down and unwind with your family. You can also curate your social media by only following accounts that make you feel good and blocking or ignoring accounts which may make you feel angry, low or depressed. Limiting use of devices can also help you have 'good sleep' which in turn can help with your energy levels and mental wellbeing.

Remember your passions

Before you became a parent of carer, you may have had hobbies or passions which have fallen by the wayside. Finding time to engage in activities which you enjoy can boost your self-esteem and have a positive impact on your own wellbeing. Whether its baking, crafting, creative writing, or drawing and painting, there are many activities you can do at home that needn't cost too much and can give you a sense of pride when the activity is complete. Of course, you may prefer to join a choir or local drama group or even just taking time to listen to music that you like rather than what your kids like can prove beneficial.

Additional support

Whilst self-care is important, it is important to recognise that if you are struggling as a parent or carer with your mental health and wellbeing that you know that there is help and support out there for you. Your GP should be able to offer help and support and, if necessary, refer you to an adult mental health service. Where possible, try to talk to a trusted friend or relative so they are also aware of how you're feeling and can check in on you. The below organisations also offer crisis support for parents and carers:

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Guidance on the importance of self-care for parents and carers

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6 in 60 | School Anxiety/ EBSA morning routine

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Looking after ourselves in this way - through self-care - doesn't need something extraordinary, but some 'ordinary magic' (as described by the psychologist, Ann Masten). Moments of kindness, the offer of a helping hand, showing and receiving care and attention have the power to transform even the darkest moments.

As a parent or carer, you may well be thinking about your own child's wellbeing while forgetting your own. But like many aspects of parenting, this involves you putting your own oxygen mask on first to look after yourself. That way, you will be best able to offer a helping hand to the children and teenagers in your life.

Everyone's approach to self-care will look different, but it is helpful to run through a mental checklist of some of the important areas to consider:

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Looking after ourselves in this way - through self-care - doesn't need something extraordinary, but some 'ordinary magic' (as described by the psychologist, Ann Masten). Moments of kindness, the offer of a helping hand, showing and receiving care and attention have the power to transform even the darkest moments.

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How many hats do you wear? Parent, child, spouse, friend, employee, employer? Whatever roles you're responsible for, when your child's mental health declines, and you're expected to work as if it hasn't, it can add an additional layer of stress to an already challenging situation.

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Supporting parents with children suffering with mental health illnesses. Learn more about our mission, access support services, and join our online community.

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Not Fine in School is a parent-led organisation empowering families & raising awareness of school attendance barriers (school refusal/ anxiety/ SEND/ bullying)

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Autism Girls Network

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Talking mental health with secondary pupils -tips for parents 

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Talking mental health with secondary pupils -tips for parents 

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Talking about mental health - tips for parents 

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Talking about mental health - tips for parents 

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Podcast: Absenteeism in schools | NSPCC Learning

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In this podcast, experts from the NSPCC and Childline discuss school absenteeism, which has increased since the pandemic, and the safeguarding implications of children missing school.

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School refusal is more common than we think, and we need to be aware of that. This film wants to give you a perspective of a young student who is  struggling with school refusal.

The short film is available in English, Dutch, French, Turkish and Arabic voices. All have the possibility to add English subtitles to follow along.

More information on school refusal on www.hogent.be/schoolrefusal

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How school stress can lead to school refusal

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How school stress can lead to school refusal

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REFLECT Confidential Mental Health Support

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REFLECT Confidential Mental Health Support

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An app to help self-manage anxiety

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Molehill Mountain is an app to help autistic people understand and self-manage anxiety.

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Information for young people on mental health and wellbeing

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If you’re struggling with how you’re feeling, it can be really scary and upsetting. Our information will help you find the support you deserve for your mental health.

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Are you aged 11-19, living in Luton, and looking for health advice?

You can now text the Luton School Nurse Service on 07520 616070 to ask health related questions you might have including mental health, drugs, relationships, healthy eating and much more.

ChatHealth is an easy, confidential, anonymous way to ask questions about your health, and our Luton school nurse team will be there to answer your text from 9am to 4pm, Monday to Friday (except bank holidays).

Budding young rap artist Jayden, from Luton, has written and produced a rap for ChatHealth. The rap was created following a competition in February directed at young people to design a rap to encourage young people across Beds and Luton talk about relationships, bullying and healthy eating among other issues through direct, confidential texts with their school nurses.

Read the full press release about Jayden's rap here,

Jayden has also been on ITV Anglia re his ChatHealth rap - you can pick up the filming here - click here.
For schools and youth organisations
Would you like a member of our school nurse team to share further information on ChatHealth with young people at your school, health centre or youth organisation?

Let us know by emailing us on: ccs.bedsandlutonchildrenshealthhub@nhs.net
For parents
Share this page with your child if you think they might benefit from the ChatHealth service, and if they use social media, you can also direct them towards our Instagram, Facebook or Twitter for further information and updates.
Feedback
Do you have any questions, ideas or feedback about ChatHealth? Feel free to email our school nursing team on: ccs.bedsandlutonchildrenshealthhub@nhs.net
Confidentiality and safety disclaimer
We do not usually inform your parents, teachers or anyone else if you contact the school nurse. We might inform someone if we were concerned about your safety, but we would usually speak to you first. Your messages are stored and can be seen by other healthcare staff who follow the same confidentiality rules. We aim to reply to you within one working day and you should get an immediate bounce-back to confirm we received your text. Normal working hours are 09:00-16:00 Monday - Friday (except bank holidays), texts will not be seen outside of this time. If you need help before you hear back from us, contact a member of school staff, your GP, call NHS 111 or Childline on 0800 1111. And if it is an emergency, dial 999 or visit A&E. Our text number does not receive voice calls or MMS picture messages. We support messaging from UK mobile numbers only (which does not include messages sent from landlines, international mobile numbers and some 'number masking' mobile apps). To view our NHS privacy notice please internet search: "NHS CCS privacy notice" or use this link bit.ly/nhsprivacynotice. Prevent the school nurse from sending messages to you by texting STOP to our number. Please respect your school's mobile phone policy. Messages are charged at your usual rate.
Did you spot our new ChatHealth design?
We recently ran a competition and invited young people from across Luton and Bedfordshire to design our new designs. We received loads of fantasic entries, and a selection of them can be found in the video below. The panel of young people chose a design by Andrea, aged 10 because they felt her poster captured the feel of ChatHealth from a young person's point of view. Her winning poster is now being used as the face of the Luton and Beds ChatHealth campaign and is being displayed across our social media sites.

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Are you aged 11-19, living in Luton, and looking for health advice? You can now text the Luton School Nurse Service on 07520 616070 to ask health related questions you might have including mental health, drugs, relationships, healthy eating and much more.

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BEDFORDSHIRE & LUTON SERVICES CHUMS currently delivers nine services across Luton & Bedfordshire, although not all are available in both areas. Supporting children and young people is at the heart of everything we do, and we are passionate about supporting as many children and young people as we can.

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Kooth is your online mental wellbeing community. Access free, safe and anonymous

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Symbol-supported books and activities to support children's wellbeing

Good mental health is essential in order to help young people live happy and healthy lives. This resource pack, which has been produced in partnership with Dr Jerricah Holder, Educational Psychologist, contains symbolised books and activities to support children's understanding of wellbeing and self-care.

The symbolised books explain what wellbeing 'looks like' and provides guidance on how children can improve their own wellbeing. The themes of resilience and mindfulness are also explored. This pack aims to help build emotional understanding.

Children will explore how they may experience 'comfortable' and 'uncomfortable' bodily sensations and how these 'signs' can help them make sense of how they are feeling. Children will learn the importance of developing a 'web of support' as a way of ensuring they have a network of trusted adults who they can ask for support.

This resource pack would support the teaching of Relationships and Sex Education (RSE) and Health Education in schools.

Download

PDF

IP3

About Dr Jerricah Holder

Dr Jerricah Holder is an experienced Child and Educational Psychologist and creator of the School Wellbeing Card Series. Jerricah is passionate about the development of creative visual resources that empower children and young people to share their views and experiences, and which help to centre the child and young person's voice at the heart of assessment and intervention.

The Wellbeing pack has been developed in consultation with Dr Holder, who has had a significant input into the Resilience Cards in particular.

Contents

Wellbeing Book

A symbol-supported book to explain the importance of self-care and wellbeing to young people in a simplistic and concise way.

Five Ways to Wellbeing Book

This book follows on well from the Wellbeing Book as it encourages children to explore a variety of activities to promote and improve their wellbeing.

Resilience Book

A social story to develop an awareness of how to face challenges and overcome obstacles.

Positive Qualities

An activity to develop self-confidence and help children to recognise feelings and qualities in themselves and in other people. This activity aims to help children to recognise the importance of building caring friendships.

Circles of Control

A practical activity to help children understand that some things are beyond their control. This resource enables children to recognise a variety of different situations that may arise within daily life and organise them onto the circles of control proforma.

Comfortable and Uncomfortable Bodily Sensations

A resource to support children in developing an awareness of comfortable / uncomfortable bodily sensations that they may experience and the importance of making changes in order to feel safe.

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Wellbeing Pack | Widgit Symbol Resources

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Good mental health is essential in order to help young people live happy and healthy lives. This resource pack, which has been produced in partnership with Dr Jerricah Holder, Educational Psychologist, contains symbolised books and activities to support children's understanding of wellbeing and self-care.

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Drop-in service.
You can book an appointment if you prefer-just contact the service who will let you know what to expect.

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Update: The Luton Young Person's Sanctuary is now operating 7 days a week 4pm - 10pm at the ResoLUTiONs Hub, except Tuesday's where it will operate from the Luton Wellbeing Centre.

Young Person's Sanctuary Luton

Mind BLMK are delighted to be working collaboratively with CAMHS and East London Foundation Trust (ELFT) across Luton, Central Bedfordshire and Bedford, to provide crisis services for young adults in need of mental health support.

Our Young Person's Sanctuaries are safe, non-judgemental spaces that you can come to if you find yourself in crisis or mental distress in the evenings. You will be met by a trained mental health worker who will listen and help you identify ways to address the problems you are facing.

Who are the Young Person's Sanctuaries for?

Young people (14-17yrs) who are experiencing severe mental distress or crisis.

Young people are welcome to bring anyone from their support system.

Young people do not need to be known to mental health services to attend.

What can you expect?

A safe, non-judgemental, and relaxed space

A confidential one-to-one session with a trained mental health worker

Support to identify coping mechanisms and building emotional resilience

A step-by-step tailored guide on how to access support and keep safe

Do you need an appointment?

Each Young Person Sanctuary is now operating a drop-in service and an appointment is not required.

Where is the Luton Young Person Sanctuary's based?

Young Person's Hub ResoLUTiONs, 89 Castle Street, LU1 3AJ: (Mon-Fri, except Tues)

Luton Wellbeing Centre, 46-56 Dumfries Street, Luton LU1 5BP (Tues ONLY)

What are the opening times?

The Luton Young Person's Sanctuary will be open on Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays only from 4pm -10pm to begin with.

Questions about the service?

If you would like further information about our Young Person's Sanctuary, please email us on: [email protected] (open 9.00am - 4:30pm).

Please note: This is for enquiries only as referrals are not necessary. Please also be advised that we cannot offer crisis support over the phone during these hours.

Luton Young Person's Sanctuary

This service has been funded by East London NHS Foundation Trust

Mindline Trans+ national helpline

MindLine Trans+ is a confidential mental health support helpline for people who identify as trans, A gender, gender fluid, or non-binary.

Find out more

Side by side

Side by Side is a supportive online community where you can talk about your mental health and connect with others who understand what you are going through.

Find out more

Mental health A-Z

Information and advice on a huge range of mental health topics from the national Mind website.

Find out more

Urgent help

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Young Person's Sanctuary Luton - Mind BLMK

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Update: The Luton Young Person's Sanctuary is now operating 7 days a week 4pm - 10pm at the ResoLUTiONs Hub, except Tuesday's where it will operate from the Luton Wellbeing Centre. Mind BLMK are delighted to be working collaboratively with CAMHS and East London Foundation Trust (ELFT) across Luton, Central Bedfordshire and Bedford, to provide crisis services for young adults in need of mental health support.

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A brand new suite of free resources to help you support young people's emotional and mental health

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Video for young people - healthy coping strategies

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Video for young people - healthy coping strategies

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Healthy coping strategies: video for young people : Mentally Healthy Schools

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Learn about different practical coping strategies and how to use them in this video.

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Life Hacks is aimed at children and young people from age 11 to 19 years who would benefit from additional support to improve their social, emotional, or physical health and wellbeing.

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Links to mental health support - national (and in Central Beds) for young people 

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Links to mental health support - national (and in Central Beds) for young people 

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Help with your thoughts and feelings

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Talking mental health animation and teacher toolkit

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Talking mental health animation and teacher toolkit

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Accompanying resources

We have developed a Teacher Toolkit for school staff to use alongside the animation which includes:

A lesson plan

An Assembly PowerPoint

An accompanying Assembly Plan

Tips for talking for parents and carers booklet

Various resources and classroom exercises

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Talking mental health: animation & teacher toolkit

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Talking Mental Health is an animation and accompanying teacher toolkit designed to help begin conversations about mental health in the classroom and beyond.

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Attendance Support Team | Luton Directory

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Improving school attendance is everybody’s business, it is a key priority for the Council. The Attendance Support Team fulfils the Local Authority’s duties and responsibilities relating to school attendance and promotes inclusion of children in full-time education. The Attendance Support Officers (ASOs) will work with schools, families and statutory and voluntary partners to overcome barriers to attendance, ensuring all children are able to access the full time education to which they are entitled. The service works with partner agencies and services to try to bring about changes in young people’s circumstances that might be contributing to irregular school attendance. They predominantly work with children and young people of compulsory school age, but will work with younger age groups in some circumstances. The team are also the point of contact in Luton Council for child performance licences, work permits and chaperone licences. The Attendance Support Service has published new guidance to set out the process for all schools to notify the Local Authority when a child is placed on a part time school timetable.

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For children with SEND, anxiety or sensory overload are common factors affecting behaviour and attendance, which are not always easy to spot. If you think there may be underlying needs, discuss and explore with the school how these might be assessed and supported.

It can be useful to think about who you would like to meet with in school. School staff have different roles and you might want to change who you meet with as your child's needs emerge or change. For example, to start with you may have spoken with their class teacher, or someone in a pastoral role at the school, and you may now find you want to talk to the SENCO to discuss next steps, with assessing and supporting your child's needs.

You may find it helpful to look at your school's 'SEN Information Report', which should explain how the school identifies and supports pupils with SEN.

Working with school

Ask your child what they are finding difficult and what they would like to change - this can help identify specific triggers and worries. Your child's views should always be the starting point of any discussion about support.

Here are some ideasfor support strategies for your child, which you could ask about:

meet and greet by a trusted member of staff at the start (sometimes during or at the end) of the day

school staff regularly checking with them that they are okay

visual timetable - clear information about what happens now and next

help to understand and manage their feelings and emotions

positive praise (for getting through a lesson - replacing sanctions for challenging behaviour)

'time-out' card for when feeling overwhelmed in lessons

lesson breaks (to allow some calm down time)

changes to timetable, if particular lessons are a trigger

learning away from the classroom, in a dedicated area or room sometimes known as a 'safe space'

lunching away from the dinner hall, ask whether any lunchtime clubs are available (avoiding a crowded dinner hall)

1:1 or small group interventions, support programmes, anxiety or friendship groups

permission to leave lessons or school 5 minutes early to avoid crowded corridors

Involving specialist services

You can speak to a school nurse, or your child's GP for advice, recommendations or a possible referral to specialist health services. Share this information with school so they have the full picture, and you can discuss next steps together.

When you meet with school to discuss your child's support plan, you can ask about referral options, for example:

Where support options available to school have been exhausted, a request to the Local Authority to carry out an EHC needs assessment can be made.

For the full range of support services available to children and young people with SEND go to: Luton Local Offer Emotional Wellbeing Information Resource

Other External Support and advice for young people:

ChatHealth - young people 11-19 can text a school nurse on 07507 331450 (for advice on a range of issues including; sexual health, drugs, self-harm, bullying)

4YP - local charity organisation supporting young people 12-25 with social, emotional and physical health and wellbeing (drop-ins and counselling)

Kooth - online counselling and emotional wellbeing support service for young people aged 11 to 18

Moodwise - digital tools and resources to support young people's emotional wellbeing (set up on Suffolk's Healthwatch Website)

Young Minds - young people in crisis can text: YM to 85258

School-refusal

Sometimes anxiety can worsen to the point that a child or young person starts to feel they are unable to go to school. Speak to their school as soon as possible, to let them know about the difficulties they are experiencing. You can also talk to their GP.

Reduced timetable

The law says that children of compulsory school age have the right to a full-time education, and reduced timetables are unlawful (unless following medical opinion that this would be in the child's best interests). However, a reduced timetable can sometimes be an effective, temporary measure to support a child who is refusing to go to school. There should be a plan to support a gradual increase to full-time hours, regular reviews and should only happen with parental consent and the involvement of appropriate services. For more detailed advice please click here or alternatively contact the service.

For further advice and support about the use of part timetable and your rights, please see the FAQs on our website or alternatively you can seek assistance from the Access to Education Team within the LA.

Other Useful links

Choosing to home-educate (known as Elective Home Education or EHE)

Schools must not seek to persuade parents to educate their child at home by way of avoiding exclusion, or due to poor attendance.

Home educating a child requires a lot of dedication, hard work and patience. Being both parent and teacher can be very challenging. For some parents it is a rewarding option which works well for them and their child, but it is a big decision to make.

Parents consider EHE for many reasons, for example if they are being threatened with prosecution for non-attendance. However, if your child is struggling at school or refusing to go, if they are extremely anxious, have sensory needs which are overwhelming or at risk of exclusion, electing to home educate may not necessarily be the answer in the long term. There may be support or other options which better meet your child's needs and family circumstances.

Take time to explore options and find out as much as you can about home educating so you can make an informed choice. There are many websites offering information and advice, and you may be able to find a local support group with other parents making the same choice.

Where you have an Education, health and care (EHC) plan

If your child is becoming anxious about going to school and they have an Education, Health and Care plan, you could contact the Local Authority to request an early annual review.

The review will provide you with the opportunity to let the Local Authority know about the difficulties and discuss the support in place, and the progress being made towards outcomes. You can also ask for re-assessment if you believe your child's needs have changed significantly since the plan was first issued, if you think the professional advice needs updating, or the provision is no longer meeting needs.

You will be able to propose any changes you would like to see made to the plan, for example with the support that is provided or with the outcomes.

You will also have an opportunity to request a particular school to be named, should the Local Authority decide to amend the plan following review.
Read more about Annual Reviews of an EHC plan
Further information advice and support

When a child has been refusing to attend school and their behaviour and/or anxiety appears to be worsening, it is important to seek help as soon as possible.

Please contact a member of the SENDIAS service if you require additional assistance

Not in Fine in school have produced a detailed report of evidence which provides information on the theory of school refusal and the challenges that young people and families face: Click here to access the PDF

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For children with SEND, anxiety or sensory overload are common factors affecting behaviour and attendance, which are not always easy to spot. If you think there may be underlying needs, discuss and explore with the school how these might be assessed and supported. It can...

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School nurses can be contacted via the Health HUB on 0300 555 0606 or by email: ccs.bedsandlutonchildrenshealthhub@nhs.net

We are still accepting referrals. If you have any issues or concerns relating to the child/young person's health or wellbeing, you can complete the referral form attached (see below) and sent via the 0-19 generic secure email for the attention of the school nursing team: ccs.bedsandlutonchildrenshealthhub@nhs.net

School Nursing Links -Sept 2020 - click for main stream schools list and allocated 5-19 staff.

Special needs schools are support by the Community Nursing team - Monday to Friday, 8am to 6pm. Weekends and bank holidays, 9am to 5pm. Tel: 0333 4050079

Where our service is based
The Poynt, Unit 2, 3 Poynters Rd, Luton LU4 0LA
Click here for Local and National resources

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School nurses can be contacted via the Health HUB on 0300 555 0606 or by email: ccs.bedsandlutonchildrenshealthhub@nhs.net We are still accepting referrals.

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Our Family Hubs offer free support and inclusive activities for families in Luton. Services include early years activities, family health, parenting, training, and various engaging sessions such as craft activities, toddler time, baby yoga, baby massage, sensory play, and more!

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Link to other wellbeing/mental health services for CYP

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Link to other wellbeing/mental health services for CYP

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Child & Adolescent Mental Health Service CAMHS 

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Child & Adolescent Mental Health Service CAMHS 

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The Community Eating Disorder Service (CEDS)
The Community Eating Disorder service (CEDS) is a single dedicated team developed within tier 3 CAMHS across Luton CCG and Bedfordshire CCG and includes a range of CAMHS professionals. The team leads on the direct delivery of interventions for children and young people presenting with moderate and severe presentations of eating disorders. The service model includes an appropriate emphasis on prevention and early intervention.

Neuro Developmental Team (NDT)
This is a countywide Tier 3 service, where Tier 2 services such as nurse-led sleep clinic, nurse-led behavioural clinics, locality parenting support teams, CHUMS and Child Development Centre assessments (as appropriate) have been previously. Referrals are based on young people presenting with a combination of both: evidence of learning disability (IQ<70) and / or a diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder or severe challenging behaviour and or moderate to severe.

Adolescent Mental Health Team (AMHT)
The specialist team work with young people age 13-17 presenting with severe mental illness and behaviour indicating a high risk to themselves or others. This will include young people who are psychotic, bipolar, severely depressed or dysphoric and emotionally unstable, or with other conditions such as obsessive compulsive disorder where there is a high level of dysfunction, and those isolated to a marked degree when it is considered a significant mental illness is likely. The main function of the model is to provide an alternative to in-patient admission through community based interventions.

Emotional and Behavioural Team
The team provides assessment and treatment for young people with emotional and / or behavioural difficulties unless already managed by any of the above specialist teams.

​Dunstable Clinic:
5 Beech Close
Dunstable
Bedfordshire
LU6 3SD

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CAMHS (South Bedfordshire and Luton) | East London NHS Foundation Trust

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The Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS) provides outpatient assessments, support and treatment for children and young people up to the age of 18 experiencing moderate to severe mental health problems.

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SENDIAS - Children and Young People with medical needs 

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SENDIAS - Children and Young People with medical needs 

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The SEND Code of Practice 2015 states:

Schools have a notional SEN budget and many schools will commission services (such as speech and language therapy, pastoral care and counselling services) to support pupils...The school's governing body must ensure that arrangements are in place in schools to support pupils at school with medical conditions and should ensure that school leaders consult health and social care professionals, pupils and parents to make sure that the needs of children with medical conditions are effectively supported.

Colleges...

...should ensure they have access to external specialist services and expertise. These can include, for example, educational psychologists, Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS), specialist teachers and support services, supported employment services and therapists.

If your child is too sick to go to school, your local authority will look to provide them with as normal an education as an illness allows.

This may mean, for example, arranging access to home teaching, a hospital school or hospital teaching service or an integrated hospital/home education service.

Local authorities should have a senior officer in charge of overseeing the arrangements. They should also have a written policy setting out how they will go about meeting their responsibilities.

The local authority is responsible for ensuring that pupils:

are not at home without access to education for more than 15 working days

have access to education from the start, if it's clear that they will be away from school for long and recurring periods

receive an education of similar quality to that available in school

get their minimum entitlement of five hours teaching per week if they're educated at home because of illness, as long as their health permits it

Under section 100 of the Children and Families Act 2014, schools, Academies and PRUs "must make arrangements for supporting pupils at the school with medical conditions". This duty is owed by the "appropriate authority" which is either the governing body (of a maintained school) or the proprietor (if it is an Academy).

The Government has published statutory guidance called " Supporting pupils at school with medical conditions " to explain to schools, parents and carers how this duty should be carried out.

Next Steps

Initially raise any concerns directly with the education setting to ensure they remain fully informed about short and long terms health conditions. If appropriate, seek advice from any medical teams currently involved with your child or young person over your concerns around the impact of their health on their attendance.

If your child or young person has an EHCP you may also wish to raise any concerns with your assessment officer in SENDAT.

The SENDIAS service is happy to offer any further information, advice and support in relation to any concerns you may have, tel: 01582 548156 or email [email protected] to make contact with the service.

Other information related to this topic:

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Children and Young People with Medical Needs

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The SEND Code of Practice 2015 states: Schools have a notional SEN budget and many schools will commission services (such as speech and language therapy, pastoral care and counselling services) to support pupils...The school's governing body must ensure that arrangements are in...

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Trained staff are on hand to provide support, advice and guidance to parents to help them build on their parenting skills.

As part of supervising Family Time (Contact) staff can assess relationships, family dynamics and monitor improvements.

Family Time can benefit children and birth relatives in numerous ways:

it can ease the sense of loss and provide reassurance for both children and their relatives

it can help to maintain family relationships

through the sessions, children are able to gain a greater understanding of their history and identity, which may enhance their self-esteem

The Manor Centre is newly refurbished and the following facilities are available:

nine furnished rooms - all rooms have kitchenettes with microwave and sinks

two rooms with full kitchens for baking and cooking with children

bathing facilities available

outdoor play area with basketball net, outdoor toys and equipment

age appropriate toys available

arts and crafts materials

cots, prams, high chairs and bedding

baby changing facilities

bottles, sterilising equipment

access to resources and tools for service users with learning difficulties

disabled Access

The centre provides supervised assessed Family Time for any of the following:

children aged up to 18 years old and their significant relatives

children subject to court orders

parents and children with mental health, learning difficulties and/or physical disabilities

parents who have a history of, or are currently undergoing treatment for, drug and alcohol misuse

families from diverse ethnic, religious and cultural backgrounds

The Manor Centre is newly refurbished and the following facilities are available:

Traded Services available for private individuals or Local Authorities who wish to purchase supervised Family Time Sessions

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This is a specialist service which works with 3 to 16 year olds with a diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder.

We offer advice and support for parents, carers and schools, and accept referrals from a range of professionals in consultation with the family.

More about FLAG

Diagnosis Support Pack

The Autism Support Service offers children young people and their families the following:

support to families from point of diagnosis and ongoing support through Families in Luton Autism Group (FLAG)

discussion with staff regarding practical strategies to help referred child access their learning and provide the best possible learning environment for pupils with autistic spectrum difficulties

support in setting targets for referred child's individual education plan

support when planning for referred child's move to school or to their next school

training for staff in referred child's setting if requested

liaison with other educational, health and social services.

advice on developing your child's social interaction, social communication and flexible thinking

The Autism Spectrum team offer schools the following:

classroom or setting observation with staff consultation to identify specific barriers to learning

advice and support strategies provided in a written report

advisory teacher meets with staff for 'surgery' where children are discussed and advice given during the session

training on autism spectrum conditions with a focus agreed by school for delivery to staff and governors e.g. 'The World Through My Eyes' course giving an overview of autism or more specialist courses such as 'Autism: Girls and Young Women' which clarifies how autism presents in girls and investigates masking & the impact this may have on provision

online inset: understanding autistic spectrum disorders - details from contacts below

specialist input also available for 0 to 5s

advice and support in setting up social skills groups for children and young people; and participation in the DREAM group which is a small online group for secondary aged girls invited from schools and settings for a six session programme

Support for specialist ASC (autism spectrum condition) provisions:

advisory teacher meets with staff for 'surgery' where children are discussed and advice given during the session

training on autism spectrum conditions with a focus agreed by school for delivery to staff and governors. For example, 'The World Through My Eyes' course giving an overview of autism or more specialist courses such as 'Autism: Girls and Young Women' which clarifies how autism presents in girls and investigates masking & the impact this may have on provision

online inset: understanding autistic spectrum disorders - details from contacts below

practical support, training and role modelling to individual or small groups of staff

specialist input also available for 0 to 5s

meetings with families, advising on structured approach ie schedules and work systems

How to refer

We accept referrals from a range of professionals. Children will usually have a diagnosis of an autism spectrum disorder or condition to be accepted onto caseload. Parents must be consulted and agree to the referral.

Assessment is carried out in school or setting. In exceptional cases this sometimes undertaken in child's home.

Who are we?

Our team consists of two advisory teachers for pupils aged from 7 to 16+ years and two advisors for the Early Years aged between 3 to 7 years.

Staff are well qualified and highly experienced in supporting children on the autism spectrum.

The Autism Support Service is available as a traded service for academies and free schools in Luton, as well as to schools beyond Luton and private schools.

Costs

For details of costs, please contact:

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This is a specialist service which works with 3 to 16 year olds with a diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder. We offer advice and support for parents, carers and schools, and accept referrals from a range of professionals in consultation with the family.

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Child & Educational Psychology Service  

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Child & Educational Psychology Service  

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Educational psychologists (EP) apply knowledge of psychology, child development and education to promote children's learning, social development, mental health and emotional well-being.

Educational Psychologists are postgraduate, applied psychologists. Many have been teachers and all have experience of working with children and young people in educational settings in addition to a Masters degree in Educational Psychology and/ or a doctorate in Educational Psychology.

EPs are registered with and bound by ethical professional practice guidance and codes of conduct determined by the Health and Care Professionals Council (HCPC).

The Luton Child and Educational Psychology Service provides a 'core' service to schools as part of our statutory role; an EP is always required to provide psychological advice when a child is going through the statutory assessment process (for an Education, Health and Care Needs Assessment).

The Service is also a 'traded service' and schools can use their delegated Special Educational Needs (SEN) funding to purchase EP hours to access the Service.

Who do we support?

We work through consultation and collaboration with significant adults in the child or young person's life (for example, parents and carers, school staff and other professionals involved) and directly with children and young people aged 0 to 25 to seek solutions to concerns and difficulties.

What can you expect from us?

The role of the EP is wide-ranging. Work with children or young people may involve one, some or all of the following:

working directly with individuals or groups of children to promote learning, social skills or emotional regulation. This may involve observation of a child or young person in lessons or on the playground and individual assessments with the child or young person. Individual assessments will vary according to the nature of the request for EP involvement and the child's presenting difficulties

working through consultation with other significant adults to make plans to achieve positive change for individual children or young people whose learning, development or social or emotional well-being is causing concern

working directly with parents or carers, e.g. consultation, Video Interaction Guidance (VIG), Nurtured Heart intervention

advising schools, settings and parents and carers on interventions and strategies including ways to evaluate their effectiveness

direct delivery of therapeutic intervention, such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Mindfulness (individual or group), Play therapy (individual or group).

gaining the views of children and young people

Work with schools and other educational settings or community work may involve:

contributing to professional development (training) of teachers and other educational support staff including training on evidence-based and research-informed interventions

responding to 'critical incidents' involving schools (e.g. a sudden, unexpected event or sequence of events that are distressing to pupils and/or staff. It may involve violence against members of the school, serious accident or sudden death of a child or adult member of staff)

working with schools to help develop policies or evaluate practice to promote learning or positive behaviour

liaising, coordinating information and working with other agencies involved with children and their families/ carers

specific specialist input around the needs of looked-after children, e.g. training for social workers, foster carers, Consultation for schools, social workers and foster carers

training for community partners, such as Edwin Lobo Centre staff

contributing to Statutory Assessment of Special Educational Needs under Children & Families Act, 2014

How to get involvement from the service/ who can request involvement?

School or Nursery Special Educational Needs Coordinators (SENCOs) can request EP involvement for the most complex children in their school or setting. Parents/ carers must give their informed consent for us to become involved with a child (there is a request for involvement form that the school/ setting must fill in and then ask parents/ carers to sign to give their consent).

Parents / carers will usually be asked to attend a meeting with the EP on the day they are visiting the school (or on another date if the one arranged is not convenient for parents/ carers).

Parents and carers who feel their child needs EP involvement should speak with the school's SENCO.

The Virtual School has access to and can request involvement from within their dedicated time from their link EP. Our specialist social care/ looked-after children EP offers a consultation service for parents, carers and professionals where there is social care involvement or where a child is looked after or was previously looked after. A direct request for consultation with the specialist LAC/ Social care EP can be made.

What happens after service has been involved?

After they have finished their work with a child or young person (the EP may work with/ consult with others about a child just once or several times), the EP will write up a summary of their involvement. A copy of this written feedback will be sent to school/ setting, parents/ carers and any other professionals who are involved with the child.

The written feedback will include details of the purpose of their involvement, child or young person's views, parent/ carer views, a summary of the child's strengths and areas of difficulties, formulation or summary/ conclusion and some suggested or agreed actions including objectives, outcomes and strategies and interventions. The summary will also indicate suggested or agreed review arrangements.

If the EP's work has been part of the statutory assessment process they will write up more formal and detailed advice (Statutory Advice for Education, Health and Care Needs Assessment). A copy of this will be sent to parents/ carers, the school setting and the Special Educational Needs Assessment Team.

What can you do if a school does not feel your child needs EP involvement?

Your child's school's SENCO may have put in place appropriate levels of intervention and support and most children and young people with special educational needs (SEN) are able to have their needs met from within a schools resources and without the need for assessment by an EP. If your child's school do not think EP involvement is required you could:

ask the school's SENCO if there are any other Special Educational Needs Support (SENS) Services that your child could access

Search the Local Offer for other SEN Support Services, click on the pink 'specific areas of need' tiles or the 'if you have concerns' pathway

Get in touch with the Special Educational Needs Information, Advice and Support Service (SENDIAS). This team will be able talk with you about your concerns and can help you find information and support.

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Educational psychologists (EP) apply knowledge of psychology, child development and education to promote children's learning, social development, mental health and emotional well-being. Educational Psychologists are postgraduate, applied psychologists. Many have been teachers and all have experience of working with children and young people in educational settings in addition to a Masters degree in Educational Psychology and/ or a doctorate in Educational Psychology.

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Working Together to Improve School Attendance 

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Working Together to Improve School Attendance 

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Summary Table of Responsibilities for school attendance 

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Summary Table of Responsibilities for school attendance 

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Examples of Reasonable Adjustments as Ordinarily Available Provision 

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Examples of Reasonable Adjustments as Ordinarily Available Provision 

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EBSA schools and professionals guidance V12

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Advice for parents and carers

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BITESIZE CPD | School Anxiety/EBSA - Starting the Day Well

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A way to gather your child's feelings and thoughts about school

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School phobia, or school-related anxiety - sometimes called 'school refusal' - is when your child feels fearful or anxious about school and/or is unable to go to school. It's also referred to as emotionally-based school avoidance (EBSA) or anxiety-related absence.
It can happen at any age, and it can be more common among children with additional or special educational needs (SEN). There can be many reasons why your child might experience school anxiety, but dealing with it can be stressful for you as a parent, as well as your child.

Parents' Toolkit has teamed up with educational psychologist Dr Amanda Furness and SEN advisory teacher Sarah Barton to give you advice on how to handle 'school refusal' and where to go for help.

'School refusal' is a catch-all term used to describe when a child is anxious about or unable to attend school.

Dr Amanda Furness points out the term can be misleading because, "it implies that children and young people are making a choice not to attend", whereas in reality there are likely to be many interacting contributing factors. Therefore many people prefer to call it emotionally-based school avoidance (EBSA).

There's some evidence to suggest more pupils have experienced challenges getting in to school since the Covid-19 pandemic. In the autumn term of 2021, almost 1.7m children missed seven days of school or more. Even allowing for some Covid disruption, that figure is significantly higher than before the pandemic.

Dr Furness says difficulties attending school, whether primary or secondary, "can happen suddenly or build over time" and "can be very complex and are likely to be due to a range of interactive factors". However, reasons for not wanting to go back in can include anxieties around...

social and/or work pressures at school

difficulties maintaining positive relationships with peers or staff

unmet needs (eg: additional needs or feeling unsafe)

home and/or family factors

sensory needs making the environment feel overwhelming

Other reasons include a range of socioeconomic factors, plus some parents choosing to electively home educate their children because they feel their child's needs were no longer being met in school.

Dr Furness says: "It's common for young people who feel unable to attend school to experience heightened anxiety," but it might not always show up in a " typical way". Some ways you might spot it in your child include...

not wanting to get up, get ready or go to school

anxiety and heightened emotions when getting ready to leave for school

physical symptoms like headaches, stomach ache or feeling sick

a change in behaviour either by becoming more withdrawn or acting out more

trouble sleeping or getting to sleep

not doing schoolwork or performing worse at school

not going into school without telling you

When a child elects not to go to school it can have a knock on effect for others - especially for a parent or carer who may then have to stay off work, but the resulting stress can then exacerbate feelings of guilt or worry in the child.

It can be a worrying time for you as a parent, so go easy on yourself and your child. The most important thing is to listen to your child and to try and be calm, patient and show empathy. It's also important to look after yourself and seek support when you need it.

Dr Furness says start by working together with your child and their school to identify patterns or possible triggers.

Consider whether there are any current social difficulties or learning challenges, or if there have been any events or triggers that could have caused a change in the way the child feels about school."

"It's important to have open and non-confrontational conversations with young people about what they're finding difficult, remembering that they may not be able to verbalise this fully themselves."

Start talking to your child's school as early as you can. "Most schools will suggest talking with the class teacher first, and this can be escalated to the school Special Educational Needs and Disability Coordinator (SENDCo), who will be able to advise on support. Also - have open conversations with school staff who monitor attendance."

If your child is able to make it into school, you can still support them by talking through the school day and discussing what might help at each stage, linking them up with a pastoral staff member and/or peer buddy at school, providing a safe space for them within school, and having a 'time-out' or 'exit' card they can use in class if they feel anxious.

Some children may also benefit from extra responsibilities at school, or involvement in sport or extracurricular activities. Discuss what might work best with your child's teacher or SENDCo.

If your child isn't able to get into school, avoid arguing with them and be supportive of any small achievements they make, like putting their uniform on or walking to the school gates, even if they can't go in.
Keep in regular contact with school and work with them on strategies to help your child, including work for them to do at home if necessary. Keep a note of your correspondence as you may be asked to provide evidence that your child isn't well enough to be in school.

Sarah Barton works with children and parents in Rochdale who've decided to electively home educate their child, often due to emotionally-based school avoidance. She advises getting help whilst your child is still enrolled at school...

"See what's available at your local Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS) - do they have a drop-in centre? Look into local charities like Thrive that can support you. Talk to school about what support will look like, how it can be measured - in terms of goal-setting - and how you'll adjust things as you go along."

Get in touch with CAMHS as early as possible if you have any concerns about your child's mental health - waiting times for CAHMS have risen since the pandemic with the average wait last year being more than two months, topping eight months in some areas. Our mental health first aid kit for parents can guide you through steps to take and offers some things you can do whilst you and your child are waiting to access these services.

It's also worth making an appointment with your GP to check for any neurological issues and to discuss next steps.

Dr Furness says children with special educational needs (SEN), "may experience heightened anxiety due to social factors, environmental factors (e.g. sensory needs), or learning barriers."

"Some children with social, emotional and mental health needs can experience high levels of stress. They may mask these needs in school and show them more at home until they're no longer able to maintain their masking. This often leads to a seemingly sudden change in their attendance or behaviour."

Take things slowly with your child and gradually introduce tasks for them to complete, to help them get to school or cope once they're in school.

Whilst each child's needs will be individual to them, Dr Furness recommends identifying a 'safe place' and 'safe adult' in school, particularly around transitions. "If you know your child is anxious about school, be proactive in getting support in place before this escalates. Work with the SENDCo to identify potential barriers and reasonable adjustments that can be made."

Sarah Barton adds: "Talk to the school about a bespoke support package for your child, for example: who do they report to when they get into school? Should we have a phone call with the family at the end of the day? What plan is in place if your child doesn't go in that day?"

You can also apply to your local authority for an education, health and care plan (EHC) which will work out your child's educational, health and/or social needs and set out the additional support needed to meet those needs.

Dr Furness says support will look different for each child, but some ideas include...

Ensure each day is a fresh start. Often pupils who've been unable to attend school then feel they can't reintegrate.

Try to avoid a 'shame cycle'. Acknowledge their difficulty, validate their feelings and explain that you can work together to overcome barriers.

Work with the school to identify learning that can be done at home. This will help to ensure that your child doesn't feel like they've fallen behind too much.

Be proactive in lowering baseline levels of anxiety. For example, through mindfulness activities around transition points.

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School anxiety and refusal: How parents can help their child get through tough times - BBC Parents' Toolkit

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Emotionally-based school avoidance, or 'school refusal', has increased since the pandemic. Here are tips to help parents to understand what causes it and to help their child cope.