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When Marion reached out with her own to touch them,  I snatched them back, I didn't want her to touch me. Not now.

“ I didn't know what to do Marion, i was a kid, i wondered for hours if it was my fault”

“Elisha, it was never your fault, I'm sorry”

I stood up and stood in front of the sink, glass in hand. I felt my eyes watering, from frustration, anger, sadness. I shouldn't have brought this up in the first place,

I could feel Marion's eyes on me, wondering what i'm   going to do next.  I turned around and looked her in the eye, the room was silent, the only noise were the city noises and the water dripping from the water fountain.

She stood up and reached for my hands, this time i didn't stanch them back. Suddenly it was like everything came crashing down, I fell into her arms crying, like I used to when I was little.

“I'm so sorry Elisha” Marion said as she held me in her arms, i felt her soft sweater on my cheek smelt like a mix of our laundry detergent and her perfume. I feel like a child again, like for a split second I could pretend she didn't leave and everything was fine, i was a little girl.

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“I am going to bed, Stacy.” Anne yelled downstairs.

“Who are you?” Anne asked a black boy.

“Miah, I love your sister Ellie.”

“Ohh.. miah, i've heard a lot about you..”  anne says with disgust in her voice

“I'm sure you have, I've been really wanting to talk to you.” miah says softly

“What do you want to talk to me about?”

“I want to know what about me you hated so much? All I ever did was care for and love your sister.”

“Uh -i just didn't approve of you for my sister and I think she could have found someone so much better than you.” anne says while avoiding eye contact with miah

“ But what did I ever do? I wasn't a bad boyfriend to her. Is it because of my skin color?”

“I-what um well i mean not specifically. Maybe a little but either way I don't think you were good for ellie.”

“ anne.. Can I ask you something ?” miah says calmly

“Sure?”

“Do you think you would have ever been able to accept mine and Ellie's relationship if I was still alive?”

“ no. I don't think you were good for her and I knew I was right about you and you ended up hurting Ellie in the end. I wish I could have prevented it from happening when I had the chance.” Anne says with hate in her voice.

“It was never my intention to hurt her. Seeing Ellie hurt crushed me, if i could go back i would do everything I can to just be with Ellie for a second and give her a hug and tell her itll be okay. Anne.. whether this conversation changes your opinion on me i just want you to know that your sister was the love of my life and she meant the world to me. All I want to do is prove to you that I was worthy of being with your sister.”

Miah says with pain in his voice.

Anne just looks at him with no words able to come out of her mouth.

“Thanks for talking to me anne.. Goodbye.” miah says as she slowly disappears.

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It was a warm day in the South at Miah’s grandma’s house. He was there to have a conversation with her.  When he got there his grandma was crying and laughing, she was so happy to see him.(pg.7) “Hi grandma how’s it going?” “Not to bad way better now that your here, how about you Jeremiah?” ”Pretty good, I just wanted to have a conversation with you about something personal.” “Okay lets go sit in the shade.”(pg6) “I want to tell you I have a girlfriend now grandma.” “That’s great!”  “Theres more though.” “What is it?” “Shes white, she goes to school with me at Percy in New York.” “You know your dad won’t be happy but I can’t control you.” “ I know dad will be mad but I don’t care.” Miah got back to New York and kept living his everyday life.

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They are at the courtroom on a Sunday morning with the officer, Miah's family and Ellie.

“What led you to shoot Miah?! An innocent boy!” Ellie said, aggressively cracks could be heard in her voice.

“He wasn’t listening to me when I told him to stop running.” The officer said snakingly

Ellie felt warm tears rolling down her face.

“ You know you were in the wrong for shooting an innocent boy. He wasn't even the right person.” Ellie said

“ I am very sorry and I know I was in the wrong for doing this.” The officer said while shaking very nervously

“ You see, the judge admitted that he did wrong and is guilty.” Ellie said with anger

The judge then charged the officer with manslaughter and pleaded guilty with man slaughter for 13 years in prison.

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  Ellie walked in the rain hearing her footsteps make a little splash every time she moved. She saw Norman's house and it was gigantic then she started walking towards Norman's doorstep knowing that she will finally meet Miahs father.Once she reached the door she rang the doorbell to the gigantic house upon her and waited.Then she saw him.. Miahs father, Ellie saw that Miah just looked like his father and then Norman said “come in your getting soaked out there” Ellie started to walk inside and then she had her first glimpse of his house and she saw all the filming equipment he had and she wondered “ did Norman use these to film Somewhere on this Journey?'' Now she was amazed that Norman Roselind was Miah’s father.After that Norman guided her to the living room and she sat down on the couch and said “ what was Miah like when he was younger ?” Norman chuckled “ He was very smart and he always wanted to practice basketball when he had spare time  “ Ellie smiled, “ I bet he could have made it to the NBA “ Norman whispered   “ I bet “.“ Well, i have to go back to filming my new film but you can stop by anytime “ Norman said, Ellie thanked him and said “ of course, It would be cool to see what you used to film Somewhere on this journey “Ellie walked outside of the house and thought “ Miah and Norman are definitely alike “She walked to the bus while the breeze swayed her hair and then disappeared into the quiet night.

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  Ellie walked in the rain hearing her footsteps make a little splash every time she moved. She saw Norman's house and it was gigantic then she started walking towards Norman's doorstep knowing that she will finally meet Miahs father.Once she reached the door she rang the doorbell to the gigantic house upon her and waited.Then she saw him.. Miahs father, Ellie saw that Miah just looked like his father and then Norman said “come in your getting soaked out there” Ellie started to walk inside and then she had her first glimpse of his house and she saw all the filming equipment he had and she wondered “ did Norman use these to film Somewhere on this Journey?'' Now she was amazed that Norman Roselind was Miah’s father.After that Norman guided her to the living room and she sat down on the couch and said “ what was Miah like when he was younger ?” Norman chuckled “ He was very smart and he always wanted to practice basketball when he had spare time  “ Ellie smiled, “ I bet he could have made it to the NBA “ Norman whispered   “ I bet “.“ Well, i have to go back to filming my new film but you can stop by anytime “ Norman said, Ellie thanked him and said “ of course, It would be cool to see what you used to film Somewhere on this journey “Ellie walked outside of the house and thought “ Miah and Norman are definitely alike “She walked to the bus while the breeze swayed her hair and then disappeared into the quiet night.

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“I miss him, you know,” Ellie murmured, staring down balefully at the picture of her and Jeremiah standing awkwardly in their Percy academy uniforms.

She was gripping the smooth wooden picture frame with such intensity she thought it might snap in half. Not that Ellie cared. Some small, annoying, voice at the back of her head was telling her to calm down, that it would all be okay. She was choosing to ignore that voice.

“Yeah me too, Ellie,” Carlton murmured back, just as softly. It was freezing outside, both of them sporting dry cracked lips, not that either of them really felt it. The two were sitting on the steps outside the church after the funeral service, a space of cold empty air between them. Empty air aching with the long gone presence of one Jeremiah Roseland. Ellie’s Miah, her kind eye’d, warm hearted, beautiful Miah who seemed so intrinsic to her life, and who now was gone.

Suddenly a sharp, painful lump built its way into her throat, her eyes watering for the thousandth time since “the incident.” That’s what she called it, “the incident”, because thinking about it had become too painful to bear as of late.

“I don't think I’ll ever forget him, I mean, not even in a million years,” Carlton admitted, the corner of his mouth twitching up in a sad sort of amusement. “You know, he used to always talk about being stuck behind his parents’ shadows, but I think he was way too bright to be overshadowed by anything.”

Ellie raised her eyes from where she was staring a hole into the cement to turn and study Carlton for a second. Then, after a moment she smiled too, remembering the way Jeremiah would light up whenever he talked about his old friends, or basketball, or whatever he was passionate about at the moment. She recalled the day they skipped class to go to Central Park, the way they sat under the trees and the way he almost blinded her with his smile and his laugh and his wonderful, wonderful eyes.

“Yeah, he was way too bright a star.”

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“Miah… please come back….” Ellie screams at nothing. Sitting on her bed staring at the ceiling hoping for something to happen. In her house she hears Marion call out to her.

“Are you okay?” Marion yells up the stairs.

“Yes Marion.” Ellie says bluntly.

“Miah. I can’t live without you, please. Don’t leave me.” Ellie says quietly as her voice leaves her with sadness.

“Ellie.” A familiar voice came from her side.

Ellie moves to her left to see where the voice came from. Except nothing was there.

“Ellie.” The voice calls out again.

“Miah!?” Ellie responds with her heart beating quicker.

“Ellie. You need to stop, you keep calling out to me.” Miah responds to her from the depths of her mind.

“Miah? Are you here?” She responds with haste.

Ellie sits for a couple seconds waiting for something to happen. Her heart racing for an answer.

“Ellie, please. You hear my voice and go crazy. You need to move on.” Miah appears in her mind as clear as day.

“Miah, you’re back!” Ellie exclaims with excitement. Laying in bed staring at her ceiling with the biggest grin as tears rush down her face. She sees Miah standing next to the tree they first kissed under.

“Please, I know you miss me, and I didn’t want to come here because I knew how you’d hope for me more.” Miah says with his body shrugged and voice sorrow.

“What do you mean Miah?” Ellie says scared of the answer she knows already.

“I’m gone.”

“And I can’t come back.” Miah exclaims.

“I love you Ellie. But you need to move on, for yourself.” Miah says with desperation.

Ellie feels as if the weight of everything was just doubled. She sinks into her bed sobbing. She knows Miah is gone. But she can’t let go. Everything she does is feeble and pointless. She knows deep down that she has to accept it. But maybe, maybe that was Miah coming to save my soul from drifting too far down the inescapable pit of void.

“I love you Miah. I will never stop” She whispers one last time.

She is only met with silence.

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“Elisha?” Marion called upstairs to Ellie’s room. “There’s someone on the phone who wants to talk to you.”

Ellie took a shaky breath and began the walk downstairs. It had been only three days since Miah had… left. She couldn’t think of the word “death.” Not about him. It was too soon and too heavy right now. But this time, Miah’s leaving was permanent. Not like Marion’s was so long ago.

Ellie picked up the phone after she had made it downstairs. Slowly. Like she didn’t want to know who it was on the other end.

“Ellie?” Nelia’s voice. Ellie bit her tongue to steady her own voice, as if it would help somehow.

“Nelia.” Ellie said, her hands shaking. “I expected a call from you. I just didn’t know when, or if you would find my number somewhere…” But weren’t people always moving towards each other?

Nelia’s voice wavered on the other end. Ellie could tell she was crying. She didn’t blame her. “I found your number in Miah’s notebook. We’d like you to… to come to Jeremiah’s funeral. He would have wanted you there.”

The rest of the conversation between Nelia and Ellie passed. Ellie wanted to say so much more. But there was something she needed to say to Marion first.

“Mom.” It felt strange calling her that after so long. Almost wrong somehow. But Ellie didn’t have time to linger on that. “Did you hear about what happened three days ago?” Ellie did her best to try to steady her voice again and found that she couldn’t. Did it even really matter?

“Yes. These things are always a little hard to process, so—” Marion said, suddenly cut off by Ellie. Marion didn’t fully get it yet. Didn’t get what Miah meant to her. She would, though. Where would Ellie begin?

“His name was Jeremiah. I called him Miah.” Ellie took another deep breath. “Miah was my boyfriend. We were going out together. And I’m sorry for not telling you earlier, I just…” What was her excuse?

Marion’s expression seemed to switch from disappointed to sympathetic in just a matter of seconds. “How long did you keep all this hidden? Why? Elisha…”

“I was going to tell you three days ago. And then he was gone.” Ellie tried not to sob instead of breathe. Untangling this web of lies would take time. But Ellie could start now. “When I was absent from Trig that day… I was with him in Central Park. That’s why I didn’t want to explain.”

Marion put her hand on Ellie’s shoulder. This was… Uncharacteristic. But Ellie accepted it. “Is there anything else I should know about?”

Another shaky breath from Ellie. “Miah’s Black. And I talked to Anne on the phone about him, and she was all weird about it, so I assumed you would be too.” And I waited so long. Too long.

Marion looked surprised, but kept her usual calm tone. It seemed to lose some of its coldness, though. “Elisha, I wouldn’t. Not knowing what I know now.”

There was still so much to repair. Some things would never be fixed. Too much damage done to glue it back together.

But it was a start.

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