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Hi Alessandro! A strength of your paragraph was your transition words. I really liked “To further prove this statement,” “to go beyond,” and “in the final analysis.” They kept the piece alive and didn’t make it repetitive. Another thing that I liked was the claim and sum it up sentence. They both stated the theme and the Pixar title, along with an elaborate word choice. However, one thing that I would change up a bit would be the first evidence. You didn’t put quotation marks, and the Pixar Short doesn’t “reveal” stuff, but instead showcases it to the viewer.

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Hi Alessandro i really enjoyed how in your paragraph you added very expressive word choice. Like how you said to further prove this statement. This really made me like your paragraph. I also enjoyed how you had  your sum up . It was one of the best sum ups I’ve ever read. I loved how you said under no circumstances and the word  dissimilarly. I wish you had added more to the explanation. I felt like it was kind of underwhelming.

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Hi Alessandro, a star in your theme analysis paragraph is how you explained your evidence talking about the sheep and saying what the evidence means in your own words. Both explanations explained well how the sheep should be treated the same way others are treated. My 2nd star is saw in your eyes theme analysis paragraph is how you used a variety of transition words sprinkled throughout our cares theme analysis paragraph wicked spiced up the writing. The transition used in your writing was Furthermore, Clearly, Evidently, etc. Something to improve on in your writing is removing past tense words almost any word that has an “ed” at the end of a word like the word “judged you used should be removed because all the writing should be in the present tense.

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I enjoyed reading your paragraph. One thing I found amazing was how much detail that you added. Detail is key. Detail lets the paragraph speak. Secondly, I really enjoyed your transition words! They are really useful for finding the reaction for the characters. Although for my wish, I noticed that you do not have a transition word or two highlighted. I recommend highlighting those transition words so I can see how many their are overall. I really like you’re writing piece so far.

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Hi! One thing I liked about your paragraph, “Analyzing Themes: Boundin’” was that you had a really broad word choice. I really liked how you used words like “impartial” and “distinct.” Another thing that stood out to me was how thorough you were, all throughout the paragraph. The evidence was accurate and had a time stamp, the explanation, all three sections, were absolutely phenomenal. And lastly, the final thing that I really liked was that you showed the reader (me) what the theme of the Pixar Short was and why. You supported your evidence with many reasons, and you clearly stated them.

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Hi, Alessandro. I really like your writing piece. It was really well built and organized. One star that I have for you is that I really liked how much green I am seeing. I love all of the explanations! Secondly, the transition words are amazing! I am seeing in total 14 transition words highltied in light blue! Keep it up, Alessandro! For my wish, in a couple spots, I am seeing some periods that are connected to your next sentence. It is not so so major, but it also isn’t nothing.

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Hi Alessandro! A strength in your CEES paragraph was your hook because as it did it hooked me into reading your story. In addition, I liked how you had a good explanation for your evidence. However I would just keep the text all the same instead of always changing it.

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Hi, Alessandro! A pro in your essay that I came across was how you explained your evidence. For example, you sounded very informative in every single one and weren't bland or boring. Additionally, I saw how you used good punctuation throughout your essay, so it made it much easier and simpler to read your C.E.E.S essay. However, a suggestion is putting more unique transition words because when I was reading your essay. I noticed a lot of repetitive transitions. Ultimately, it can ruin your essay overall. To change this I would look at the list of transitions and delete the repetitive ones then replace them with unique ones. To add on, your anecdotes hardly used any sensory details making it hard for the reader to visualize what’s happening. But in general, it's a very good well crafted piece and wish you luck!

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hi  alessandro sorry if I said your name wrong uhh I liked how you put loads of deals into this and I found this  thing more deep than funny. I also liked how you used good thingy like “ , . etc.  One thing you can work on is… nothing I found extremely good and breathtaking. well one thing I would  like to say is that you are a very good writer and could win a mealt for writing. Keep up the good work just one last thing why do you have the 🤬 meme there it is dead. from Robert😹

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hi  alessandro sorry if I said your name wrong uhh I liked how you put loads of deals into this and I found this  thing more deep than funny. I also liked how you used good thingy like “ , . etc.  One thing you can work on is… nothing I found extremely good and breathtaking. well one thing I would  like to say is that you are a very good writer and could win a mealt for writing. Keep up the good work just one last thing why do you have the 🤬 meme there it is dead. from Robert😹

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Your memoir was so garbage hahhahaha - from ciara

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Uhh I liked how you put alot of dealt in to it.And i also liked how you showed us what it was like. :star I would like for you to tell me who the heck is kevin. From bobert :D

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Uhh I liked how you put alot of dealt in to it.And i also liked how you showed us what it was like. :star I would like for you to tell me who the heck is kevin. From bobert :D