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Course Requirements for The Heart of Education:  An Introduction to The Virtues Project

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Course Requirements for The Heart of Education:  An Introduction to The Virtues Project

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Largest School in the World Implements The Virtues Project

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Largest School in the World Implements The Virtues Project

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City Montessori implements The Virtues Project

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Overview of The Virtues Project's 5 Strategies

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Dara Feldman This is America Interview about The Virtues Project

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Course Assignment Template to be submitted by Mon. July 29th at 6:00 PM :).  

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Course Assignment Template to be submitted by Mon. July 29th at 6:00 PM :).  

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Final Shepherd Intro to The Virtues Project Jan 2024-1

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Original Virtues Project Website:  You Can Access Many of the Decks of Cards Here

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Original Virtues Project Website:  You Can Access Many of the Decks of Cards Here

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Bringing Virtues to Life

The Virtues Project is a global grassroots initiative to inspire the practice of virtues in everyday life. The Project is sparking a global revolution of kindness, justice, and integrity in more than 95 countries through its facilitators and Virtues Connections.

The Virtues Project empowers individuals to live more authentic meaningful lives, families to raise children of compassion and integrity, educators to create safe, caring, and high performing learning communities, and leaders to encourage excellence and ethics in the work place. It has inspired and mobilized people worldwide to commit acts of service and generosity, to heal violence with virtues.

The Five Virtues Strategies awaken the gifts of character, through inspiring programs, books, and materials that help us to remember who we really are and to live by our highest values.

The Virtues Project was founded in Canada in 1991 by Linda Kavelin Popov, Dr. Dan Popov and John Kavelin. It was honored by the United Nations during the International Year of the Family as a "model global program for families of all cultures".

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The Virtues Project is a global grassroots initiative to inspire the practice of virtues in everyday life. The Project is sparking a global revolution of kindness, justice, and integrity in more than 95 countries through its facilitators and Virtues Connections.

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Featured Products The latest inspirational products to help you on life's journey | | Add to wishlist Quick View Clear $79.99 - $129.99 Select options Card Decks Customized Virtues Card Deck $79.99 - $129.99 | | Add to wishlist Quick View Clear $26.95 Select options...

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Update from Annette from Our Civil Mission

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Update from Annette from Our Civil Mission

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The Virtues Project: The Impact Continues

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The Virtues Project:  Teacher Testimonials

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Safe And Caring Schools Talk by Linda Kavelin Popov, co-founder of The Virtues Project by Dara Feldman

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This talk describes how to create safe and caring schools by using the 5 Strategies of The Virtues Project, a global initiative for bringing out the best in ourselves and others.  It was a talk delivered by Linda Kavelin Popov, co-founder of the project, to educators in 2001.  Given the climate in our schools & our world, I believe it is even more relevant today!  For more info about the project visit www.virtuesproject.org. If you are interested in professional development, I would be honored to support you.  Please visit www.darafeldman.com

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Building a better Trinidad and Tobago - The Virtues Project 2015

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The Virtues Project Impact on Discipline & Attendance

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Acceptance as it dances with the other 99 virtues | Christine Ayling | TEDxGrandePrairie

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Description

The Virtues Project was honored by the United Nations during the International Year of the Family as a model global program for all cultures and was featured on the Oprah Show as a method for teaching children to "do the right thing." This guide for counselors, teachers, caregivers and youth leaders offers a wealth of character awakening activities and ideas for bringing out the best in your students and yourself.

The Virtues Project contains proven strategies for awakening virtues the gifts within. It represents a holistic approach to character education that can easily be integrated into existing curricula in individual classrooms, counseling groups, school, day-care center, or youth program.
Major components include:

The simple elements of character honored by all cultures and spiritual traditions 52 basic virtues!

"The language of virtues" for drawing out the best in children

Proven methods for creating a culture of character and reducing violence

Powerful strategies to inspire Excellence, Respect, Kindness, Commitment and Cooperation in all students

Success stories and activities from schools, Boys and Girls Clubs and childcare programs around the globe

Activities for children of all ages

Virtues in games and art

You will learn:

Positive school-wide discipline with restorative justice

Tips for Transforming Bully Behavior

Counseling tools that empower moral choices

One-minute counseling strategies

How to begin the year with a shared vision

Simple ways to introduce the "Virtue of the Week"

Peer mentoring techniques

Ways to turn your school into a community of caring

A language which turns character slogans into behavior

The e-book includes printable pages for the first page of each Virtue, Student Activity Sheets, Virtues Vouchers, and Hug Notes.
E-Book Features and Benefits

Accessible from any device with Internet access

Search and find using keywords

Add notes and bookmarks as you read

To see more of this product's contents:
274 pages * e-book * ©2000
Book Review: "This program claims to move from shaming to naming by recognizing behavioral problems as teachable moments. Like Gibbs, Popov believes in a focus on positive virtues rather than judgements. One of the many exemplary teachers in the book says, 'With harsh discipline you learn systematic mediocrity, so that you won't be noticed...shaming children discourages excellence.' The book provides a superb overview as well as practical examples of how to spot virtue and activities for educators."
Kara Smith (December 2005, "Guides and Disasters," Professionally Speaking, pp. 39-40).

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The Virtues Project Educators Guide Simple Ways to Create a Culture of Character EBook

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The Virtues Project™ Educator's Guide: Simple Ways to Create a Culture of Character E-Book The Virtues Project was honored by the United Nations during the International Year of the Family as a model global program for all cultures and was featured on the Oprah Show as a method for teaching children to "do the right thing."

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Breakout Room Activity 1:  Opening Circle

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Breakout Room Activity 1:  Opening Circle

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Tools, Learning Apps, Training to Bring Happiness, Meaning and Purpose

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Inspirational Words, Empowerment Tools, Daily Reflections for People, Teams, Business, Communities. Culture of Appreciation, Energize, Positive Character Qualities

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Is a Global initiative, inspiring the practices of virtues in everyday life. Started By Linda Kavelin-Popov, Dan Popov and John Kavelin to counteract violence and social disconnection.

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Share the LOVE DECA

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Washington DECA's mission is to provide business and leadership opportunities to high school students to succeed in school, careers and life.

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THE V CHANNEL (TVC) is the only non-religious, 100% virtues-driven children's self-improvement media platform available today. TVC educates as well as entertains its target audience and is a valuable teaching resource for parents, teachers and coaches alike.
THE BENEFIT OF VIRTUES ARE MANY. SO ARE THE WAYS TO LEARN THEM.
COLORING PAGES FOR AGES 5+

Featuring popular characters and simple virtues lessons, "V"TOONS Coloring Pages are a fun and engaging activity to teach kids how to turn words into actions and ideals into realities.

GET FREE "V"TOONS >

VIDEOS FOR AGES 8+

Discover how virtues inspire kids of all ages to be their very best. From life's little victories to life-changing dramas.

"RELIABILITY"
Watch how Marcus uses reliability in his everyday life to be someone people can depend on.

"DETACHMENT"
Watch how a young man loses his temper, resulting in tragic consequences and learn how choosing detachment could have avoided tragedy.
WATCH ALL TVC VIDEOS >
AN ORIGINAL TVC SERIES:

THE "V" SHOW is an interview and talk show exploring the value of virtues in today's crazy, mixed-up, beautiful world.
LEARN MORE ABOUT THE "V" SHOW >
STAY TUNED TO THE V CHANNEL

THE V CHANNEL (TVC) is the only non-religious, 100% virtues-driven children's self-improvement media platform available today. Stay tuned as we seek a publishing deal and corporate sponsors to help us inspire kids to be their best.

For more information contact Scott Feraco.
Email: scott@theVchannel.com
Mobile: 917-445-0102

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VIRTUOUS STUFF FOR KIDS AND THE GROWNUPS WHO CARE ABOUT THEM.

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Currently in development, THE V CHANNEL (TVC) is a nonreligious media initiative to increase awareness of virtues. TVC's proposition is simple: Engage and inform parents, teachers and coaches-everyone who cares for children-about the power of virtues, and give them simple ways to inspire kids of all ages to be their very best.

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Justin Timberlake - CAN'T STOP THE FEELING! (from DreamWorks Animation's "TROLLS") (Official Video)

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Virtues Cards App:  Unfortunately, currently it is only working on iPhone.  We are updating for Android users.  Thank you for you patience and understanding!

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Virtues Cards App:  Unfortunately, currently it is only working on iPhone.  We are updating for Android users.  Thank you for you patience and understanding!

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A quest for a life of joy, meaning, and purpose
This easy-to-use app is designed to aid you in your everyday quest to acquire and cultivate virtues-qualities such as compassion, gratitude, strength, hope, resilience, and justice. Like a book of daily readings, it guides you to develop upright character and, ultimately, to become your best self.
Download for Free Today!

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Virtues Cards, Daily Reflection, Learning Apps, Team Apps, Kids Apps

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A quest for a life of joy, meaning, and purpose This easy-to-use app is designed to aid you in your everyday quest to acquire and cultivate virtues-qualities such as compassion, gratitude, strength, hope, resilience, and justice. Like a book of daily readings, it guides you to develop upright character and, ultimately, to become your best self.

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Safe And Caring Schools Talk by Linda Kavelin Popov, co-founder of The Virtues Project by Dara Feldman

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This talk describes how to create safe and caring schools by using the 5 Strategies of The Virtues Project, a global initiative for bringing out the best in ourselves and others.  It was a talk delivered by Linda Kavelin Popov, co-founder of the project, to educators in 2001.  Given the climate in our schools & our world, I believe it is even more relevant today!  For more info about the project visit www.virtuesproject.org. If you are interested in professional development, I would be honored to support you.  Please visit www.darafeldman.com

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My Book PDF (feel free to share with others)

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My Book PDF (feel free to share with others)

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Free Audio of my Book (Feel free to share with others)

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Free Audio of my Book (Feel free to share with others)

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The Heart of Education: Bringing Joy, Meaning & Purpose Back to Teaching & Learning takes a sincere and insightful look at the ways we ought to be cultivating thoughtful and compassionate students in our classrooms and homes. Dara's candid reflection on her own journey is a compelling example of how one person's commitment to a promise can have such extensive and positive ripple effects across our country. I read it in a night and implemented many of the strategies for building virtues the next day. Her natural narrative around character, coupled with practical strategies for implementation, makes it a go-to manual of how we build positive habits within our young people. A must-read for those pioneering Character Education in their schools.
-MITCH BARTKIEWICZ, ASSISTANT PRINCIPAL, KIPP MEMPHIS ACADEMY MIDDLE SCHOOL

"Dara's love and knowledge of education extends well beyond the classroom and into our daily lives. The Heart of Education is an uplifting, passionate roadmap with strategies applicable in the classroom, the workplace and at home."
-TED LEONSIS, OWNER, WASHINGTON CAPITALS, WIZARDS & MYSTICS
AUTHOR, "THE BUSINESS OF HAPPINESS"

released October 20, 2016

Written & Read by Dara Feldman at Lineup Room Recording Studio Baltimore, MD.

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The Heart of Education by Dara Feldman, released 20 October 2016 1. Foreword: Written by Jack Canfield 2. Introduction 3. Chapter 1: A Journey of Transformation 4. Chapter 2: Sole Purpose or Soul Purpose 5. Chapter 3: The Road Taken 6. Chapter 4: Gifts of Character 7.

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Benefits of The Virtues Project in Education 

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Benefits of The Virtues Project in Education 

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Benefits of The Virtues Project in Education

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What are Virtues?  Talk by co-founder Dr. Dan Popov

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What are Virtues?  Talk by co-founder Dr. Dan Popov

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"What are Virtues?" Narrated by Dr, Dan Popov

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Companioning:  What not to do and what to do

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Companioning:  What not to do and what to do

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The Companioning Process:  A Demonstration and Discussion

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Stress, Trauma, and the Brain: Insights for Educators--Educator Strategies for the Classroom

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Stress, Trauma, and the Brain: Insights for Educators--Educator Strategies for the Classroom

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7:24 min. Connects to RP, Companioning and Teacher Wellbeing

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Stress, Trauma, and the Brain: Insights for Educators--Educator Strategies for the Classroom

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The Virtues Project: Virtues Acknowledgement.mov

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Strengthening Resilience During the COVID-19 Pandemic and Beyond

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Holistic Virtues Based RP Handouts 2024 Final TC

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What was the reason you became an educator?  

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What was the reason you became an educator?  

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What was the reason you became an educator?

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If you knew that developing a positive relationship with a child was at the heart of what would help them be successful in school and in life, would you invest the time? Would you be willing to give up the "love of power" for the "power of love" if it helped you to create a more caring classroom community? Finally, would you be open to the possibility that by changing your mindset you could ultimately change the outcomes for your students? If you said, "yes" to these questions, then you are on your way to becoming a restorative practitioner. Keep reading to explore these three fundamental ideas for creating a restorative model of classroom management.

Positive relationships are key to effective learning and living. If you use restorative practices right, you will save lives (Berkowitz, 2014)! Research shows "that kids who felt connected to school . . . smoked less, drank alcohol less, had a later age of sexual debut and attempted suicide less ...they do better across every academic measure. There is something in that bond, in that connection to school that changes the life trajectory--at least the health and academic behavior. It is very powerful--second only to parents in power. In some contexts it's more powerful than parents." (Saulfer, 2011). Since our relationship with our students is so significant, we need to be mindful of how our own affect is affecting our students. Research shows that humans are directly affected by the mood of others in our presence; this phenomenon is known as affective resonance. "Affective resonance refers to the process of social interaction whose progression is dynamically shaped in an entanglement of moving and being-moved, affecting and being-affected" (Muhlhoff, 2014). It is therefor essential that educators know how to keep themselves upbeat and positive as part of the process of developing a positive classroom and school climate. Along these same lines, in order for optimal learning to take place, it is important to create an open, safe, peaceful and joyful atmosphere. When students feel safe and connected, they are in a reflective state of mind and are calm, alert and open for learning. On the other hand, when they are in a reactive state of mind, such as in fight or flight mode, their brain is using its energy to protect them from threats and therefor their cognitive functions such as memory, learning and moral reasoning are impaired (Saulfer, 2011). Youth ages eight to eighteen spend more than seven hours a day being bombarded on a daily basis with often negative messages from a variety of different forms and sources of media (KFF, 2010). We must be the change we wish to see by consistently modeling positive behaviors and attitudes by reaching out to our students in ways that show we care in order to counteract all the negativity that they are exposed to and ultimately creating conditions that are conducive to learning.

Giving up the love of power for the power of love helps to create positive conditions for teaching and learning. Research from the Ministry of Education in New Zealand on School-Based Initiatives such as the Positive Behavior for Learning framework show that "opportunities for learning and achievement increase if:

the school environment is positive and supportive

expectations are consistently clear

children are consistently taught desired behaviors

children are consistently acknowledged for desired behaviors and responded to in a fair and equitable way" (ERO, 2014).

Instead of Zero Tolerance and harsh punishments, schools created these conditions by utilizing a variety of Restorative Practices. "Restorative Essentials are the everyday, informal interactions between adults and students in a school. Restorative Essentials emphasize relationships; respect, empathy, social responsibility and self-regulation, focusing on 'keeping the small things small' (ERO, 2014). One way that a restorative approach to the expression of emotions help to engage the high risk, high need student in the classroom is to operate within the "with" quadrant of the Social Discipline Window (Wachtel, 2005). Educators who operate in the "with" quadrant can help move students who come from insecure attachment styles, such as the disorganized-disoriented attachment style, to more secure attachment styles, empowering them to have more positive interactions with others, become more resilient, become able to adjust more easily to different situations, have better social and emotional skills, get higher grades and have healthier, more satisfying relationships (Kennedy & Kennedy, 2004). "Restorative Circles support teachers and their students to build and manage relationships and create opportunities for effective teaching and learning time" (ERO, 2014). Affective statements and circles can help develop trust among students and staff and students and students. By participating in circles, students with lower self-esteem and attachment issues can over time see that they are not alone. In addition, they witness models for healthy communication styles and gain healthy strategies for problem solving, ultimately improving their sense of self. "Restorative Conferencing is a range of formal tools to help schools respond to misconduct and harm. These tools include mini conferences, classroom conferences and formal restorative conferences" (ERO, 2014). In the event that a formal conference is held, high risk/high need students are given the opportunity to reflect on their behavior with support of a caring community and make an amends ultimately realizing they made a mistake, not that they are a mistake. At the end of the conference they are reintegrated to the community, which can be very healing. Instead of just being punished, they now understand how their behavior can affect others and are given guidance on how to do things differently.

"I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration; I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated, and a person is humanized or de-humanized. If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming" (Ginott, 1965). Have you ever heard a teacher say something like the following to a student? "You are just like your older brother, he never turned his homework in on time either!" or "I knew it, the nut doesn't fall far from the tree. Your dad was a poor reader and you are following in his footsteps." It is heart breaking to think that in this day and age educators don't realize that their words have the power to inspire or discourage. We often get what we expect, that is why it is imperative that we have high expectations for all of our students, while also giving those who need it a high level of support. Educators know (although I am not sure policy makers understand), that extremes such as drill and kill, managing by fear and force, getting rid of extracurricular activities, increasing classroom discipline, being the sage on the stage, preventing students from socializing throughout the day and putting in metal detectors do not improve student behavior and/or student achievement, and can exacerbate negative behavior and create more harm than good (Jensen, 2009). What does work is to "embrace the mind-set of change" (Jensen, 2009). Teachers need to truly believe that every child can be successful and they must be willing to offer their students the support, encouragement and teach the skills necessary to achieve. "Whether you think you can or you can't you are right" (Ford). We need to pass this mindset down onto our students and remember it ourselves. We need to celebrate the small and large successes along the way.

Are you ready to be the change you wish to see by embracing the three fundamental ideas outlined for creating a restorative model of classroom management? It is quite simple, though not easy. When you commit to developing positive relationships with your students, give up the love of power for the power of love and embrace the mindset of change, miracles really do happen!

References

Beach, C. (2014). At-risk students: Transforming student behavior. Rowman & Littlefield Education, Lanham, MA.

Berkowitz, Marvin. (2014) Keynote speech at the character.org Forum. Washington, DC.

The Education Review Office (ERO), Towards equitable outcomes in secondary schools: Good practice. May, 2014 Crown. New Zealand

Ginott, H. G. (1965). Between parent and child. New York: Macmillan.

Jensen, E. (2009). Teaching with poverty in mind. Alexandria, VA: ASCD

Kaiser Family Foundation. (2010). Daily media use among children and teens up dramatically from five years ago Retrieved from http://kff.org/disparities-policy/press-release/daily-media-use-among-children-and-teens-up-dramatically-from-five-years-ago/

Kennedy, J.H. & Kennedy C.E. (2004). Attachment theory: Implications for school psychology. Psychology in Schools, 41, 247-259 retrieved from http://sonoma.edu/users/f/filp/ed420/attachment.pdf

Mühlhoff , Rainer, Phenomenology and the Cognitive Sciences October 2014 Affective resonance and social interaction

Saufler, C. (2012). School climate, the brain and connection to school. Retrieved from http://www.iirp.edu/pdf/Bethlehem-2012-Presentations/Bethlehem-2012-Saufler.pdf

Wachtel, Ted. (2012). Defining restorative. Retrieved from http://www.iirp.edu/what-is-restorative-practices.php

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Simple, Not Easy: The Power of Restorative Practices as a Model for Classroom Management

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If you knew that developing a positive relationship with a child was at the heart of what would help them be successful in school and in life, would you invest the time? Would you be willing to give up the "love of power" for the "power of love" if it helped you to create a more caring classroom community?

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WE SHALL OVERCOME: LOVE WILL RISE AGAIN | nimo patel & daniel nahmod | Empty Hands Music

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Begins at 4:25

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Dara Feldman:  National Education Week's Thought Leaders Summit

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Virtues Language Manipulatives Activity 3

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Virtues Language Manipulatives Activity 3

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The version of the browser you are using is no longer supported. Please upgrade to a supported browser. Dismiss

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This is a video of an online deepening session on the Companioning Process I facilitated during Covid with City Montessori School in Lucknow, India.

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How the School-to-Prison Pipeline Functions

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Virtues Reflection Cards Social Justice Reflection Questions

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Virtues Reflection Cards Social Justice Reflection Questions

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Overview of Restorative Justice from the International Institute for Restorative Justice. It is a higher ed institution focused solely on Restorative Justice/Practices. IIRP.edu

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Core Process of Restorative Justice Circles

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Core Process of Restorative Justice Circles

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This video was created by Restorative DC. We work primarily in schools in DC and Chicago.

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Core Processes of Restorative Justice Circles

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16 min video from Virtues Affair Canadian TV Series

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The Companioning Companion:  Strategies to Deepen in the Companioning Process

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We all get upset from time to time-some of us more than others. Whether we're sad about the loss of a loved one, angry at friends or family, or fearful about the state of the world, it often feels good to let it all out.

That's because sharing our emotions reduces our stress while making us feel closer to others we share with and providing a sense of belonging. When we open up our inner selves and people respond with sympathy, we feel seen, understood, and supported.

But "sharing" covers a lot of different modes of communication. Are some healthier than others, over the long run? Science suggests that it depends, in part, on how you share and how people respond to you. Expressing our emotions often to others may actually make us feel worse, especially if we don't find a way to gain some perspective on why we feel the way we do and take steps to soothe ourselves.

Why we vent

Our emotions are valuable sources of information, alerting us that something is wrong in our environment and needs our attention. Whether we need to confront someone who's abusing us, hide to avoid danger, or seek comfort from friends, feelings like anger, fear, and sadness help us prepare to meet the moment.

But if feelings are internal signals, why do we share them with others?

"We want to connect with other people who can help validate what we're going through, and venting really does a pretty good job at fulfilling that need," says researcher Ethan Kross, author of the book . "It feels good to know there's someone there to rely on who cares enough to take time to listen."

Sharing our feelings also provides an opportunity to gain insight into what's causing our difficult feelings and avert future upsets. Sometimes, just verbalizing what's bothering us to another person helps to clarify the situation and name the emotions involved. Or, if we get caught in emotional whirlwinds, our confidants can provide new perspectives and offer sound advice, says Kross.

Unfortunately, this latter part of the equation often gets lost in the shuffle, he adds.

"When we get stuck in a venting session, it feels good in the moment, because we're connecting with other people," he says. "But if all we do is vent, we don't address our cognitive needs, too. We aren't able to make sense of what we're experiencing, to make meaning of it."

So, while venting may be good for building supportive relationships and feel good in the moment, it's not enough to help us through. If others simply listen and empathize, they may inadvertently extend our emotional upset.

The dark side of venting

For many years, psychologists believed that dark emotions, like anger, needed to be released physically. This led to a movement to "let it all out," with psychologists literally telling people to hit soft objects, like pillows or punching bags, to release pent-up feelings.

It turns out, however, that this type of emotional venting likely doesn't soothe anger as much as augment it. That's because encouraging people to act out their anger makes them relive it in their bodies, strengthening the neural pathways for anger and making it easier to get angry the next time around. Studies on venting anger (without effective feedback), whether online or verbally, have also found it to be generally unhelpful.

The same is true of grief or anxiety following trauma. While we should of course seek support from those around us during difficult times of loss and pain, if we simply relive our experience without finding some way to soothe ourselves or find meaning, it could extend our suffering.

For some time, people who worked with trauma victims encouraged them to "debrief" afterward, having them talk through what happened to them to ward off post-traumatic stress. But a randomized controlled study found that this didn't help much, likely because debriefing doesn't help distance people from their trauma. Similarly, students who vented their anxiety after 9/11 suffered from more anxiety up to four months later than those who didn't. As the study authors write, their "focus on and venting of emotions was found to be uniquely predictive of longer-term anxiety."

Venting through social media can do the same thing. In one study, researchers surveyed students attending Virginia Tech and Northern Illinois University after mass shootings occurred at each campus to see how venting their grief over social media helped them recover. While students thought that venting was beneficial, their post-traumatic stress and depression scores actually went up the more they vented.

Talking and listening with care

Besides making us feel worse, venting can also have a negative effect on our audience.

While supportive friends and family hopefully care enough to listen and sympathize with us, it can be frustrating to sit with someone who vents frequently when that person seems to be wallowing in emotion without learning from their experience. And being around someone stuck in anger, fear, or sadness cycles can be overwhelming for listeners who may end up " catching " the emotions themselves.

"Repeatedly venting over and over and over again, can create friction in social relationships," says Kross. "There's often a limit to how much listeners, your friends, can actually hear."

I know that I am guilty of wanting someone to listen to me when I'm upset-and not wanting advice right off the bat. If I'm in the midst of pain, trying to talk me out of my feelings or to offer pat solutions seems insensitive or even patronizing.

However, Kross doesn't advocate for that. Instead, he says, there's an art to being a listener. It takes a combination of empathy or sympathy-and waiting for the right moment before offering perspective.

"People are going to differ, depending on what they're dealing with, how intense their experiences are," he says. "Being sensitive to the fact that some people may need more time before they're ready to transition from venting to thinking is really important."

Skillful venting

There is a healthier way to vent, Kross says. He suggests these guidelines:

Be selective about when you vent. There are lots of ways to deal with difficult emotions, and not all of them involve other people. Some people can gain perspective on their own, by writing their thoughts down or gaining distance from them through meditation. Kross recommends changing your environment to help you process emotions and tamp down rumination that might otherwise keep you stuck in an emotional whirlwind.

When you vent to others, prompt them to offer perspective. If you find yourself venting to someone without your emotions dissipating (or maybe getting worse), you may be caught in a cycle of " co-rumination "-a rehashing that can keep you stuck. To get out of that, you can ask the person to step back and help you reframe your experience by asking, "How should I think about this differently?" or "What should I do in this situation?" This will cue them to offer perspective and assure them that you're looking for something more than a listening ear.

Consider to whom you vent. Before venting to someone, ask yourself, "Did this person really help me the last time I talked to them, or did they just make me feel worse?" If someone is there for you, but doesn't tend to broaden your perspective, you may just get more stirred up emotionally. Being more deliberate about who you vent to could help you in the long run.

Be careful around online venting. While sharing our emotions online can help us feel better in the moment and identify supportive allies, results can be mixed. For one thing, negative emotions easily spread online, which may create a herd mentality, resulting in bullying or trolling-especially if you identify a particular person as responsible for your feelings. While it's unclear if venting online is an overall good or bad thing, it may not help you gain the perspective you need to move forward.

Still, all in all, Kross says venting is a good thing, helping us cope. If we can get past the letting off steam part, we can feel better in the long run and keep our relationships strong, too.

"Venting serves some function," he says. "It has benefits for the self in terms of satisfying our social and emotional needs. We just need to find out what the correct dosage is and make sure to offer to supplement that with cognitive reframing."

Greater Good wants to know: Do you think this article will influence your opinions or behavior?

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Does Venting Your Feelings Actually Help?

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We all get upset from time to time-some of us more than others. Whether we're sad about the loss of a loved one, angry at friends or family, or fearful about the state of the world, it often feels good to let it all out.

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The Role of RP in Trauma Informed Schools Article (Reflect on How This Article Aligns with the 5 Strategies of The Virtues Project)

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The Role of RP in Trauma Informed Schools Article (Reflect on How This Article Aligns with the 5 Strategies of The Virtues Project)

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The Role of Restorative Practices in Trauma-Informed Schools — Pathways to Restorative Communities

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As we emerge from a year of isolation that has had real psychological impacts, it is critical for the resiliency of school communities that we address the trauma that many children and adults have experienced over the last year.  Even before the pandemic, schools were becoming increasingly

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Getting Started with Restorative Practices

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Getting Started with Restorative Practices

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The most important idea to keep in mind is to focus on RELATIONSHIPS.

More resources can be found at

Restorative Practices and SEL Guide and Toolkit from Chicago Public Schools

https://blog.cps.edu/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/CPS_RP_Booklet.pdf

Restorative Communities Resource Guide

https://partnershipla.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/RC-Resource-Guide-2016.pdf

OSI Baltimore RP Lesson Plan Guide

http://www.osibaltimore.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/Merged-RP-Lesson-Plan-Guide-FINAL.pdf

Establishing a Restorative Mindset White Paper

http://www.safeschools.info/images/stories/Establishing-Restorative-Mindset-White-Paper-ADA.pdf

Suspend or Innovate: Alternative Discipline that Works

http://corwin-connect.com/2016/01/suspend-or-innovate-alternative-discipline-that-works/?priorityCode=E184F1&utm_source=Adestra&utm_medium=email&utm_content=E184F1&utm_campaign=not+tracked&utm_term=

Overview of RP written by Ted Wachtel, the founder of the International Institute for Restorative Practices.

Great overview of Restorative Practices in schools, focusing on building relationships and demonstrating the RP continuum. Created by SFUSD.

Great 5 minute video getting to the why of RP from students' perspective.

Focuses on relationships, belonging, accountability, agreements & outcomes.

Inspiring circle facilitated by students and interviews about the power of circles.

Planning for Implementation

Checklist, manuals and other resources for planning and implementing RP in schools from Minnesota Dept. of Ed

http://education.state.mn.us/MDE/dse/safe/clim/prac/

Oakland Unified School District Restorative Justice Implementation Guide: A Whole School Approach

https://www.ousd.org/cms/lib/CA01001176/Centricity/Domain/134/BTC-OUSD1-IG-08b-web.pdf

Instructional and Professional Development Resources...

This is one of my favorite resource created by SFUSD to get you started. It includes an overview of circles, the rationale, ways to facilitate different types of circles and lesson plans that can walk you through step by step.

A Circle A Day: Circle Questions Aligned to the 5 Keys of Social and Emotional Learning: See attached file at the bottom of this page

Affective Language

Proactive Community Circles

Sample Responsive Circles

Intro to Restorative Practices Scenario

Youth speak out on the school to prison pipeline written by the Advancement Project.

This inspiring report is an overview of the RJ program pilot program in OUSD, a three-tiered model of prevention/ intervention/ supported reentry in response to conflict/harm. The RJ program works to lower our rate of suspension and expulsion and to foster positive school climates with the goal of eliminating racially disproportionate discipline practices and the resulting push-out of students into the prison pipeline.

This paper by Peta Blood and Margaret is designed to assist change agents at a District and Regional support level; system decision makers; and external consultants apply change management theory in the educational context to assist with the implementation of restorative practices. An understanding of effective change management theories is essential to better understand the scope of the change process and to more effectively manage implementation planning.

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RPRJActionResearch - 1. Getting Started with RP

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Welcome! Below are resources you can use to get started with Restorative Practices. The most important idea to keep in mind is to focus on RELATIONSHIPS. More resources can be found at www.darafeldman.com www.virtuesmatter.com Restorative Practices and SEL Guide and Toolkit from Chicago Public

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Navigating childhood challenges can be stressful, and sometimes deep breathing isn't the solution that works for your child. When your child is in need of tension relief, try one of these techniques:

1. Try an inversion. For centuries, Yogis have understood the calming power of bringing the head below the level of the heart, otherwise known as inversion. Whether it's relaxing in child's pose, bending over to touch your toes, or practicing a headstand, inverting the body has a restorative effect on the autonomic nervous system, which controls the body's response to stress.

2. Visualize a quiet place. Research has shown that visualization is beneficial for a range of populations to reduce stress levels. Ask your child to close their eyes and picture a calm, peaceful place. Then, gently guide them to slowly start to build up a picture of how it looks, smells, and feels to be there.

3. Drink water. Dehydration has been linked to a reduction in mental performance. Pour your child a tall class of cold water and have them sip it slowly. You can try this with them, and observe the calming effect this has on your own nervous system.

4. Sing out loud. Everyone knows the sweet relief associated with rocking out to your favorite tune. But the physical act of singing out loud, even if it is off key, has been shown to release endorphins, the "feel good" chemical in the brain.

5. Do the "Downward Facing Dog" pose. Just like inversions help reset the autonomic nervous system, the yoga pose known as Downward Facing Dog in particular has the added benefit of activating several muscles in the arms, legs, and core. This stretch helps muscles begin to burn additional blood glucose that is made available by the body's fight or flight response.

6. Paint it out. Not only does painting give the brain something to focus on other than the stressor, but participating in visual arts has been linked to resilience to stress in general. If the thought of dragging out the tempera gives you stress, have your child try "painting" with shaving cream on a plastic shower curtain in the yard. Not only is clean up a breeze, but your child will smell great when they are finished.

7. Jump rope. Set a timer for 2 minutes, put on some music, and challenge your child jump to the beat of the song. If your child isn't able to jump rope, playing hop scotch is a great alternative.

8. Jump high. Challenge your child to a jumping contest to see who can jump highest, longest, fastest, or slowest. This is another great way to get in some exercise to help your child blow off some steam.

9. Blow bubbles. Just like blowing on a pinwheel, blowing bubbles can help your child gain control of their breathing and thus, their mental state. Bonus: Running around popping bubbles is just as fun as blowing them.

10. Take a hot bath. After a long day at work, there is nothing more relaxing than laying in a bathtub of hot water with the lights turned down and no interruptions. The same holds true for kids. Use bath time as a chance to help your little one unwind from the activities of the day. Introduce a few simple bath toys and allow your child to relax as long as they need to.

11. Take a cold shower. While the complete opposite of a hot bath, cold showers actually have a restorative effect on the body. Not only do cold or even cool showers reduce inflammation in the muscles, it improves heart flow back to the heart, and leads to a boost in mood. One study on winter swimmers found that tension, fatigue, depression, and negative moods all decreased with regular plunges into cold water.

12. Have a cozy drink. There is a reason why many people herald September as the beginning of Pumpkin Spice Latte (PSL) season. Drinking a warm drink on a cool day makes your body feel warm, almost like a hug from the inside. Giving your child a warm hot chocolate or warmed milk with a splash of vanilla will elicit the same response you have over that first sip of your PSL.

13. Blow out a candle. Light a candle for your child to blow out. Then re-light it and move it further and further away from them, so they have to take deeper and deeper breaths to blow it out. This is a great way to practice deep breathing, while making a game out of it.

14. Watch fish. Have you ever wondered why there is always a fish tank in hospitals and medical centers? The University of Exeter in the UK did, and found that watching fish swim in an aquarium reduces blood pressure and heart rate. Better yet, the larger the fish tank, the greater the effect. The next time your child needs to calm down, take them to the local lake, hatchery, or aquarium for a little fish-watching therapy.

15. Count backwards from 100. Not only does counting give your child a chance to focus on something other than what is bothering them, counting backwards offers an added concentration challenge without overwhelming their brain.

16. Repeat a mantra. Create a mantra that you and your child can use to help them calm down. "I am calm" or "I am relaxed" work well, but feel free to get creative and make it something personal to you and your child.

17. Breathe into your belly. Most of us breathe incorrectly, especially when we are in a stressful situation. Have your child think about their belly like it is a balloon. Tell them to breathe in deep to fill the balloon, and breathe out to deflate it. Repeat this simple process 5 times and notice the effects.

18. Shake a glitter jar. "Calm Down Jars" have been making their way around Pinterest for a while now, but the concept behind them is sound. Giving your child a focal point for 3-5 minutes that is not the stressor will allow their brain and body to reset itself. These jars can be made simply from sealed canning jars filled with colored water and glitter or with baby food jars filled with warm water and glitter glue.

19. Go for a run. Running has been shown to reduce stress, and can sometimes be more effective than a trip to the therapist's office. Going for a 10 minute jog can not only affect your child's mood immediately, its effects on their ability to cope with stress can last for several hours afterward.

20. Count to 5. Just when it seems as though they "can't take it anymore", have your child close their eyes and count to five. This form of 5-second meditation offers the brain a chance to reset itself and be able to look at a situation from a different perspective. It also gives your child a chance to think before they act in a volatile situation.

21. Talk it out. For children who are able to verbalize their feelings, talking about what is bothering them gives them a chance to let you know what is going on while processing it for themselves. The trick is to resist the urge to "fix" the problem. Your child needs you to listen and ask appropriate questions, not offer unsolicited advice.

22. Write a letter in the voice of your BFF. We would never talk to our best friend in the same critical way we talk to ourselves. The same is true for our children. Tell them to be kind to themselves, and ask them what they would tell a best friend to do in their situation.

23. Decorate a wall. We're not talking about paint and decor, but poster tack and pictures from magazines or printed from the internet can give your child a chance to create large-scale temporary art in any space. The creative process is what is important, not the end result.

24. Create a vision board. Have your child cut out words and pictures from magazines that speak to their interests, desires, and dreams. Then have them glue these pictures and words onto a poster board to display in their room. Not only does the process of creation allow them to think about what they want from life, displaying things they love gives them an opportunity to focus on what is really important when they are upset.

25. Give or get a bear hug. Hugging allows your body to produce oxytocin, a naturally occurring hormone in your body necessary for immune system function. Not only does a 20 second hug reduce blood pressure, increase feelings of well-being, and reduce the harmful physical effects of stress, both you and your child will reap the benefits!

26. Walk in nature. According to Stanford scientists, walking in nature has been proven to improve cognition and reduce stress. Even if you do not have time to spend the 50 minutes researchers did, taking a 15 minute walk in nature works can be just what your child needs.

27. Envision your best self. This is a great way to motivate your child to work toward a goal. Have them write down where they would like to see themselves in a week, a month, or a year, with this specific goal in mind.

28. Blow on a pinwheel. Similar to the candle exercise, blowing on a pinwheel focuses more on controlled exhalation rather than deep inhalation. Tell your child to make the pinwheel go slow, then fast, then slow to show them how they can vary the rate at which they blow out the air in their lungs.

29. Squish some putty. When a child plays with putty, the brain's electrical impulses begin firing away from the areas associated with stress. Try a store bought putty or make your own.

30. Take up pottery. Much in the way playing with putty fires electrical impulses in your child's brain, sculpting with clay or throwing pots can have a similar effect. It also has the added benefit of being considered "active learning", a powerful condition that allows your child to learn through exploration.

31. Write it out. For older children, journaling, or writing their feelings down can have a profound effect on their mood, especially if they can do so without the fear of having it read. Give your child a notebook to keep in a safe place, and allow them to write about how they feel, assuring them you will not read it unless they ask you to.

32. Gratitude, gratitude, gratitude. A cousin to "write it out", gratitude journaling has been linked to better performance in the classroom as well as a reduction of stress outside of learning environments. Having a separate notebook only for things your child is grateful for will give them the freedom to keep their journaling activities separate.

33. Name your emotion. Often when children become overwhelmed, it is because they have difficulty identifying the negative thoughts they are having. Whether your child is quick to anger, panic, or obsess to ensure things are perfect, ask them to give this feeling a name, and help them talk back to it. For instance, by asking your child, "is Mr. Perfect bothering you again?" you can work together to help them challenge their perfectionism, rather than fight them over it.

34. Rock in a rocking chair. Not only does rocking in a rocking chair provide non-weight bearing strengthening to the knees and core, its repetitive nature offers stress-relief as well. Rock in a rocking chair with your child or allow them to rock by themselves as a way to self-soothe their frenzied emotions.

35. Push against a wall. This trick is perfect for allowing the body to get rid of stress hormones without having to go outside or even leave the room. Have your child try to push the wall over for 10 seconds, 3 times. This process allows the muscles to contract in a futile attempt to bring the wall down, then relax, releasing feel-good hormones into the body.

36. Crinkle tissue paper. Babies are inherently aware of this trick as one of their favorite things to do is crinkle paper. Not only does crinkling tissue paper provide a satisfying noise, the textural changes in your child's hand sends sensory feedback to the brain in a pathway away from those associated with stress.

37. Pop bubble wrap. Anyone who has received a package in the mail knows the joy of popping row after row of bubble wrap. The same material can be found at most retailers and dollar stores and be cut into manageable pieces for stress-relief anywhere, anytime.

38. Roll a tennis ball on your back. An old physical therapy trick, rolling a tennis ball on your child's back will give them a gentle massage when they are most in need of a calming touch. Focus on the shoulders, neck, and lower back as these are typical places where the body holds tension.

39. Roll a golf ball under your feet. Rolling a golf ball under your child's feet can not only improve circulation, but there are pressure points on the bottom of the feet that relieve stress and relax the muscles of the feet and legs. Roll over the entire sole of your child's foot using various pressures for maximum benefit.

40. Go to your calm down space. Having a designated "Calm Down Space" in your home gives children an opportunity to retreat when they feel out of control and rejoin the group when they need to. It is important to make this space comfortable so your child wants to visit it when they are in need of a self-imposed "time out".

41. Play music. Music has a profound effect on mood, sleep, stress, and anxiety. Use a variety of musical styles to set the tone in your home, car, or your child's room.

42. Have a dance party. Adding a physical component to your musical enjoyment gets your kids moving and is a fun way to be active. Crank up the tunes and have a dance party in your living room when your child is in a bad mood and watch their mood transform.

43. Do a primal yell. Sometimes all of your child's emotions are simply too much to contain in their body. Have them stand with their feet shoulder width apart and imagine their feelings boiling up from their toes through their legs and body, and out of their mouths. They don't have to yell words, or even maintain a certain pitch, just whatever comes out that feels good to them.

44. Change the scenery. How many times have we thought to ourselves, "Just walk away," when confronted by a big emotion? Your child may simply need a change of scenery in order to calm down. If you are inside, head out. If you are outside, find a quiet space indoors. Either way, change the scenery and you will likely change the mood.

45. Go for a walk. There's a real reason people go for walks to clear their heads. Not only is the fresh air and exercise restorative, but the natural rhythm walking creates has a self-soothing quality. Take your child on a walk, and they may even open up to your about what is on their mind.

46. Plan a fun activity. When you are in an anxious moment, it can seem as though the walls are closing in and the world will come to an end. Some children need to focus on what is ahead of them in order to reset their internal dialog. Plan something fun to do as a family, and let your child have a say in it. Any topic that will get them focused on a future something to look forward to can be helpful.

47. Knead the bread. Grandmothers around the world will tell you that the process of bread making is a tremendous stress relief. Simple recipes are abundant online that allow your child to get their hands dirty turning and pushing dough. The best part is that at the end, you have homemade bread to show for it!

48. Make a bracelet. Crafting in general can facilitate a state of "flow" or a state characterized by complete absorption in an activity. The same concept can be extended to knitting, crochet, folding laundry, or any activity where your child forgets their external surroundings.

49. Get on a bike. Bicycling for children has largely become a thing of the past. With the introduction of bicycle lanes and paved trails in urban areas, bicycling is safer than ever and can be a powerful form of self-soothing. Not only is it easy on the joints, it promotes balance, exercise, and can be done with the whole family.

50. Take a coloring break. It's not without good reason that restaurants give children coloring; it gives them something to focus on, and can be a great mindfulness activity that reduces anxiety. Make a trip with your child to pick up some crayons and markers, and get them excited about filling in the pages of a coloring book.

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50 Calm-Down Ideas to Try with Kids of All Ages | GoZen!

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50 amazing calm-down ideas for kids when they feel anxious, angry, or fearful. These are great for adults too.

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The 5 Strategies of The Virtues Project Through the Lens of Leadership

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The 5 Strategies of The Virtues Project Through the Lens of Leadership