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The benefits of .........

The drawbacks of .........

The reason why ................

The positive effects of many young people going to shopping malls.

CHIA THEO OBJECTS:

Young people

Shopping malls

SHOPPER/ SELLER/ INVESTORS

CHIA THEO ASPECTS:

WORK AND JOB

EDUCATION

HEALTH (MENTAL HEALTH + PHYSICAL HEALTH)

ENVIRONMENT

ENTERTAINMENT

ECONOMY/ FINANCE (MONEY)

LAWS/ CRIME (SECURITY)

TECHNOLOGY/ MEDIA (INVENTIONS)

SOCIETY (RELATIONSHIPS)

A -> B -> C

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The positive effects of many young people going to shopping malls on the individual and society as a whole.

[Individuals] ON AN INDIVIDUAL LEVEL [E19] Shopping malls are great places for entertainment.

=> feature recreational options such as movie theaters, arcades which can fulfill the entertainment demand for most of the young people in modern society => Provide young individuals with opportunities for leisure and recreation. => help reduce stress LEVELS , promote relaxation, and enhance mental well-being.

[Society] MAKE A POSITIVE CONTRIBUTION TO SOCIETY [E10] => ECONOMIC PROGRESS [E9]

=> Spending money in shopping malls => WITH the rapid development of advertising and marketing on social media platforms, Young people often tend to keep up with latest shopping trends =>The high demand for shopping IN SHOPPING CENTERS THAT PROVIDE A WIDE VARIETY OF MERCHANDISE SUCH AS => shop for clothing, accessories OR CUTTING-EDGE gadgets, and entertainment => stimulates consumer demand -> supporting businesses and driving sales. => RESULT IN A THRIVING ECONOMY [E16].

SVO, WHERE ...........

feature recreational options such as movie theaters, arcades

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The positive effects of many young people going to shopping malls on the individual and society as a whole.

[individual] have a reasonable spending

.all of the products sold in shopping malls have particular verified originS and fixed price and come from many PRESTIGIOUS brands BECAUSE MAINTAIN PRESTIGE OF INVESTORS shopping malls have many competitive brand offering the same type of products -> offer affordable prices -> -> the price and value of a product can be measured exactly THAN SHOPPING ONLINE AND OTHER STORES -> CAREFULLY CONSIDER OPTIONS BEFORE MAKING A PURCHASE (E38)-> impose a limit on the COMPULSIVE SHOPPING and UNWISE FINANCIAL DECISIONS (E38)

[Society] JOB OPPORTUNITIES lead to ECONOMIC PROGRESS (E9)

shopping malls provide customers with a wide variety products from many brands PROVIDING including some trendy products -> In the context of blooming social media ADVERTISEMENT, young generations tend to shop compulsively and follow new trends -> A RISE IN THE DEMAND FOR shopping at malls (E30 )-> COMPANY BOSSES (E10) tend to hire more employees to meet the needs of customers -> + LOWER UNEMPLOYMENT RATE help people to ENTER TODAY’S COMPETITIVE JOB MARKET (E21) -> REACH BUSINESS’S FULL POTENTIAL (E5) -> RESULT IN A THRIVING ECONOMY (E16)

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The positive effects of many young people going to shopping malls on the individual and society as a whole.

[Individual ] : Living in globalized world → WITH THE COMPETITIVE LABOR MARKET, young people USUALLY ARE must BE UNDER PRESSURE [E32 ] with various prospects → with FOR/ TO young people, shopping GOING TO SHOPPING CENTERS HAS BECOME CAN BE A LEISURE ACTIVITY OR A PLEASANT OUTING [E28] because the shopping malls provide are full of entertainment facilities such as cafes and restaurants→ reduce stress levels and make a contribution to THEIR HEALTHIER LIVES [E41]

[Society] : WITH/ IN THE CONTEXT OF young people's demand for trending products is increasing, shopping malls are able to meet those trendy needs make an effort to update a variety of the newest, highest quality and trendiest products -> an ever-increasing need of consumption → GREATER DEMAND FOR GOODS [E19] (NHU CẦU SẢN XUẤT) → Employers need a more abundant workforce -> .......... MORE JOB OPPORTUNITIES drive the development of labor market for young people because investors of shopping malls need their agility, hard work and creativity → regularly the salary of shops in the malls is quite high -> ALLOWS young people TO COVER a ELEVATE STANDARD OF LIVING[E4]

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The positive effects of many young people going to shopping malls on the individual and society as a whole.

[Economy]: Economic Growth (e04-p84)

Young people going to shopping malls frequently CAN contribute to the economy through their spending -> job creation in retail, services, and maintenance sectors within the community, boosting the local economy and providing employment opportunities for others.

Sửa:

Young people going to shopping malls frequently Young people tend to consume many/ A GREAT NUMBER OF products due to their desire to stay trendy and connected with the latest fashion, technology and social movements. -> creates a huge demand for shopping -> increases the need for production and customer service -> leading to job creation in these sectors -> economics expansion

YOUNG PEOPLE CÓ XU HƯỚNG TIÊU THỤ NHIỀU SẢN PHẨM VÌ ........-> HUGE SHOPPING DEMAND DẪN ĐẾN NHU CẦU SẢN XUẤT VÀ CHĂM SÓC KHÁCH HÀNG -------> JOB CREATION

[Society]: Create Social interaction

Malls are like social hubs WITH ............... -> young people can meet and interact (FORMALIZE) -> fosters social cohesion, building community ties -> provides a safe environment for young people to gather, socialize, and participate in communal activities -> enhancing their social skills.

Sửa:

Malls are like social hubs WITH bustling food courts, entertainment zones AND communal spaces vibrant atmospheres -> young people from various backgrounds converge -> share experiences, create memories together. -> fosters social cohesion, building community ties.

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*** IMPORTANT NOTES

1. Make sure all sentences are CLEAR and support your opinion (TASK RESPONSE)

Always check that your ideas are RELEVANT to the topic sentence.

2. Try to create a better connection between sentences (COHESION)

· Ideas

· Use transitional words

Firstly/Secondly/ Finally

The major reason is that/  Another reason is that/ In addition

Do NOT use 'Besides'

3. Examples REALLY need to be SPECIFIC enough (TASK RESPONSE) and relevant to the supporting idea (COHESION)

4. Do not use

· YOU

· etc ------> NÊN LIỆT KÊ A AND B

· ...

· :

5. Limit the use of the following words. Try to express your idea in another way or, if possible, use specific words

· I ==> in my view/opinion ; it seems to me that

· They ==> school students/ school-age children / young learners

overseas/international students

6. Do NOT say: They will. Say: They will be less likely to OR They may/might not …

7. Remove any unnecessary sentences whenever possible.

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[Individual] many young people going to shopping malls -> THIS IS A SATISFYING ACTIVITY [33] -> HAVE A NEW INTEREST [E40] and MIXING WITH THEIR PEERS [E12]->

Shopping Malls is are invested BY PRETIGIOUS INVESTORS to be modern trade model and is updated products from popular/ REPUTABLE brands -> young people can STAY UP TO DATE WITH THE LATEST FASHIONS [E48] and OWN THE NEWEST HIGH-STATUS DEVICE [E48] -> OFFER AN INTERESTING, ENJOYABLE AND LIFE EXPERIENCE [E35] IMPROVE LIVING STANDARDS

SHOPPING MALLS ARE UPDATED GOODS

[Society] many young people going to shopping malls

Young people can have high-demand shopping needs because they want keep up to date with latest fashion trend and stylish technology products, so shopping malls meet those needs, make them come back again and again -> -> CONTRIBUTE TO THE ECONOMY COUNTRY WITH THE MONEY THEY SPEND ON A WIDE RANGE OF GOODS AND SERVICES [E29] (WHICH ARE) WIDELY SOLD IN SHOPPING MALLS -> AN ECONOMIC PERSPECTIVE [E19], increase good consumption -> ECONOMIC PROGRESS [E9] -> -> RESULT IN A THRIVING ECONOMY [E16]

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1. Đảm bảo mọi câu phải rõ ràng và hỗ trợ được cho cái ý kiến của bạn (Yếu tố Task repsonse)

2. Luôn tạo ra sự kết nối tốt giữa các câu (Yếu tố Cohesion - mạch lạc)

3. Ví dụ cần phải cụ đủ cụ thể và liên quan đến Supporting Idea.

4. Không được dùng YOU, etc

5. Giới hạn việc dùng những từ sau đây. Cố gắng thể hiện quan điểm của bạn theo một cách khác, nếu có thể, dùng những từ cụ thể.

6. Khôn được dùng They will => nên dùng: They will be likely to OR ....

7. Loại bỏ bất kỳ câu nào không cần thiết nếu có thể.

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There are several drawbacks of online education

Luyện tập viết ý số 01 (LACK INSTANT FEEDBACK FROM TEACHERS): 5p

Luyện tập viết ý số 02 (REQUIRE MOTIVATION): 5p

Chú ý ghi rõ sự liên kết ý A-B A1-B1 trong từng câu

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There are some significant drawbacks (A) of/ ASSOCIATED WITH online education (B). The first reason -> disadvantage (A1) is the lack of instant feedback from teachers (B1). In traditional classroom settings, students can immediately ask questions and receive clarifications, THEREBY enhancing their understanding OF LECTURES (B11). However, in an online environment, responses may be delayed due to various reasons such as time zone differences or the low quality of internet connection (B12). This delay in communication can be a problem for students to understand the lecture more effectively (B13) -> Because of this delay in communication, it can be problematic for students trying to understand the lecture more effectively (B13).

responses may be delayed due to various reasons such as time zone differences or the low quality of internet connection (B12), WHICH can be a problem for students to understand the lecture more effectively (B13)

Secondly, online education require the high level of self-motivation from students (B2). IN FACT,/ THERE IS NO DENYING THAT Online learners often find themselves in lonely/ ISOLATED study situations because there are no physical presence of both peers and instructors (B21). This isolation can lead to decreased motivation, as -> Therefore, students may struggle with procrastination and the lack of immediate support and encouragement (B22).

HẠN CHẾ CÂU ĐƠN

DRAWBACK = DISADVANTAGE = DOWNSIDE

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There are several drawbacks (A) of internet-based learning (B). Firstly, students attending online CLASSES education (B1) LACK INSTANT FEEDBACK FROM TEACHERS (A1) Normally, online classes tend to open for a large number students (A11) BECAUSE from different religions, THEREFRE , they can easily join in classES without being bounded by geographical distance , making it difficult for teachers to correct each student's lessons individually. (A12). Secondly, internet-based learning (B2) REQUIREs MOTIVATION (A2). IN FACT, there is no direct teacher's supervision..... Online education (B21) would limit AS WELL AS direct interaction WITH OTHER LEARNERS BECAUSE ..., which is unlikely to have the opportunity to communicate directly with each other. People can only interact through online screens.... ,leading to more difficulty IN absorbing knowledge when compared to attending traditional courses (A21)

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There are several drawbacks of online education. Firstly, Students can lack instant feedback (A) from teachers if they join online class (B). A GREAT NUMBER OF PARTICIPANTS DUE TO easily accessibility of online class Because online class can create missing connection between students and teacher, It is very difficult for teachers to give feedbacks to each student attending in class (grammar). Therefore, Students can misunderstand (A1) about knowledges learnt from those classes (B1 , which is affects on academic performance (A2).

Secondly, Student joining in online class (A) can need motivation to participate regularLY (B). When joinning online classES (A1), it is easy for students to absent in online class for some reason such as finishing the game or having a date to go out and ask your friends to take attendance . AS A RESULT, studentS need have discipline and diligence (B1)

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There are several drawbacks (A) of online learning (B). One of the most significant drawbacks of online education (B1) is the lack of instant feedback from teachers (A1). For example/ IN FACT , students in online classes (B2) often have to wait for responses via emails or chat groups as it's difficult for online instructors to provide real-time responses for a huge number of students in different time zones and schedules, leading to delays in understanding and progress (A11). Secondly, E-learning (B3) requires a higher level of self-motivation from students (A2). This can be explained by the lack of immediate supervision of instructors (A21), therefore students have to possess the self-discipline to resist distractions and stay on track with coursework. (A22)

IN FACT/ INDEED/ FOR EXAMPLE