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Responsive parenting is often accused of creating "spoiled" children. Some people who struggle to see the connection between being responsive and emotional intelligence, will, at times, accuse responsive parents of "spoiling" their children. Usually the responsive parent is simply trying to regularly attend to their child's emotional needs and refraining from using punitive parenting strategies. What's unfortunate is that if you don't have an understanding of Attachment theory, all the critics can seem quite right. In order to develop an avoidant attachment quality in your child, one must use the powerful instincts behind a child's need to attach, as a way to manipulate them into being compliant. Secure attachment is developed through being responsive to those needs and trying not to impose your own emotional needs onto your child

A small child who's needs are regularly met with love, empathy and compassion will continue to seek this support. This may look like crying, hugging, physical attachment to the caregiver and sometimes whining."

As securely attached children find their voice, they can sometimes appear demanding, forgetting the societal norms of politeness, and not caring too much because they are not scared of the consequences of forgetting to "say please". Instead, of expecting a small child to always remember their manners, we can try and always remember ours and model saying please, in hopes that they pick up on it someday.
Spotting Avoidant Attachment in Adults
Adults who have avoidant attachment quality often exhibit telltale signs such as saying things like "I turned out fine" or having a lack of feeling about their childhood. They often forget large portions of their childhood or memories are very vague. You may find this person often using avoidant strategies; shutting down, leaving, self-medicating, stuffing down feelings, etc. They may also tend to use a lot of subtle gaslighting, usually without knowledge of it. They may struggle to validate others feelings because they struggle to validate their own. It is easier to avoid and gaslighting is a subtle way to gain power and avoid conversations that may sway that power. It can be quite challenging to break the cycle of avoidant attachment because the person was trained to use attachment to manipulate others. This is often so tempting once they have their own children and a little power can become somewhat intoxicating.

There is also the fact that when we see a child doing something we weren't allowed to do as a child, it can often evoke feelings of anxiety, frustration and panic, as we relive those experiences for ourselves. A person with avoidant attachment would possibly suffer frequently with those triggers and have to work much harder to stay calm and focused on being responsive and not punitive or controlling. This all stems from how their needs were avoided as a child. They tend to continue to ignore their own needs and have trouble not ignoring or avoiding the needs of others, including their children.

The child who has had their needs ignored or dealt with using hostility or ambivalence, will begin to ignore their own needs and accommodate to the emotional needs of their parent, in an effort to please them. This is often a tempting approach when one has experienced their own avoidant attachment relationship and lack of secure attachment. This is where things get tricky; a person with avoidant attachment, who has chosen to parent the same way, is often fixated on making their child "better." Their approach to parenting is often focused on "training" their child to adapt to their needs and ideals, rather than the other way around. As a result, the child becomes focused on the parent's happiness, instead of their own. This child will often exhibit the behaviours that the parent desires, further proving their point that the way they parent is creating a polite, obedient and respectful child who does what they are told and doesn't put up any fuss.

But is that really the goal? Sleep training is an excellent example of how this myth of the spoiled child can negatively impact even the earliest emotional development of our children. Sleep trained children can often appear to be "perfect angels" which then confuses responsive parents and gives fuel to the sleep training rhetoric. The answer is avoidant attachment- children who's needs are not usually met or met with frustration and hostility become focused on pleasing the caregiver. They begin to ignore their own bodily cues and adapt to the emotional needs of their parents.

By not responding to their night-time needs, parents are sending the message that "your feelings are not valid, your needs are not important to me, leaving me alone while I sleep is more important than your need for comfort, food, warmth, a burp." Instinctually the child will try to turn off their bodily cues, try and silence them so they can appease the needs of the caregiver. They begin to learn that the more they try and follow what the caregiver wants, the more time the caregiver spends with them. Because young children need human interaction to survive, this actually overrides their other needs in some cases. For some children this is easy, for others, many others, it is very hard to constantly try and please a caregiver. Especially since children are egocentric and have very little knowledge of the external world, so every time the caregiver is upset, they assume it is their fault. They also lack impulse control and will continue to act like children (which is often incorrectly termed "misbehaving") and then are punished for being playful or having emotions. This can have a profound impact on emotional and social development, as well as cognitive development because their play and/or emotions have been stifled.

At some point, all the psychological damage from having your needs ignored does surface, for every person that looks different. A recent Study found health risks associated with avoidant attachment. Adults with an avoidant attachment quality have learned to ignore symptoms and try and hide their feelings of discomfort, instead of seeking appropriate medical care. Other studies have found that adults with avoidant attachment have difficulty connecting with partners and often struggle in intimate relationships. Anyone who has been to any kind of therapy will tell you- "stuffing down feelings is like trying to hold a beach ball under water, it will always surface and the effort to keep it under is far more challenging than just letting it float." I heard a quote from a child psychiatrist once that said something along the lines of

all the parents we see in here with teens say 'I don't understand, at 3 he was a perfect angel.' 3 year olds are not supposed to be perfect angels." - unknown

Alfie Kohn wrote a wonderful book called "The Myth of The Spoiled Child." Turns out every generation from the beginning of time has accused the next generation of being a danger to our society because of their entitled, "spoiled" behaviour. I'm not sure why we tend to focus on "fixing" everything and everyone but children whine, they forget their manners, they interrupt people during conversations and they can be very loud in places that you are supposed to be quiet. That is because they are children who are still learning all these rules, not because they are "defiant, entitled and spoiled."

A child needs to experience something over and over sometimes, before it sinks in, especially something as difficult as being quiet in the library or saying please ALL THE TIME. Think about how much they have to say "please," because they can't do anything for themselves yet. Every time a child wants anything, they have to go find an adult, ask nicely and then hope the adult gets the message and complies. When I'm hungry, I walk down to the kitchen and find something to eat. When I am cold, I put on a sweater. When I want to get some fresh air, I go for a walk. All of these things children need to ask for. Of course, they are going to get excited and impatient sometimes and forget to ask nicely. Sometimes they may even be in a bad mood and that could trigger a tone that may be perceived as "rude." But adults never do that! We always speak to each other with kindness and respect (cue the sarcastic laugh).

So how do you raise a kind and respectful human being? Be one yourself! Model grace, model kindness, model acceptance, and that starts with our children. Treat them the way you want to be treated, truly. Really think about that, it is the golden rule, we hear it all the time and many of us try to live by it, but we stop short at our children. We want them to live by the golden rule and then we expect them to just know how. The core of that rule is empathy. Empathy is learned, it is not innate. You need to receive empathy to become empathetic, you need to experience compassion to be compassionate, you need to see the selflessness of grace in order to be gracious and you need to feel the security of unconditional acceptance in order to accept others and to accept yourself. If you made a mistake, how would you want someone else to treat you? That's the first clue on what to do with your child when they make a mistake.

What will empathy look like? Make sure you have reasonable expectations. Your two-year-old is likely not going to start holding doors open for people any time soon but you will see glimpses and know that you are on the right path. One time I was in a bit of an irritable mood. I let out an exasperated sigh and my oldest child, who was almost five at the time, came over and gave me a big, tight hug, patted my back slowly and said "it's ok to be angry mommy, it's ok to be angry." In that moment he gave me acceptance, he expressed empathy and he offered comfort and compassion. That is the goal, isn't it? Not to stop them from whining or crying for what they want but to raise kind, compassionate and empathetic members of society. That's my goal anyway.

Toddler Workshop Series that covers the Responsive Parenting approach to big emotions, sleep, toileting, hitting, biting, parent anger and so much more 👉 Over 3 hours of MP4 video, you can download today, for under 30$'s Click here
References
Attachment theory,: What is secure attachment-http://www.developmentalscience.com/blog/2017/3/31/what-is-a-secure-attachmentand-why-doesnt-attachment-parenting-get-you-there

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Does Responsive Parenting Make Children "Spoiled"?

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Responsive parenting is often accused of creating "spoiled" children. Some people who struggle to see the connection between being responsive and emotional intelligence, will, at times, accuse responsive parents of "spoiling" their children. Usually the responsive parent is simply trying to regularly attend to their child's emotional needs and refraining from using punitive parenting strategies....

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"He sleeps really well but only when he's laying on my chest, he hates his moses basket" "She cries every time we lay her on her play mat" "He hates going in his pram, he cries the second we put him in it".
If I had a pound every time I heard these from a new parent I'd be a very rich lady by now! What amazes me though is that society in general doesn't get it, they don't get why so many babies need to be held by us to settle and what perplexes me even more is that we do spend so long trying to put them down! We spend more than time though, the 'putting babies down' industry is worth millions, rocking cribs, battery swings, vibrating chairs, heartbeat teddies and the list goes on..................having been a first time parent who bought all four of the items listed above I am embarrased to admit now it honestly didn't enter into my head that perhaps the answer was to *not* put my baby down and I certainly didn't consider why these things might help. It took me a long time to understand and empathise with my baby, to see the world through his eyes so to speak.
"Empathy: the intellectual identification with thoughts, or attitudes of another." or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, "Birth suddenly disrupts this organization. During the month following birth, baby tries to regain his sense of organization and fit into life outside the womb. Birth and adaptation to postnatal life bring out the temperament of the baby, so for the first time he must do something to have his needs met. He is forced to act, to "behave." If hungry, cold, or startled, he cries. He must make an effort to get the things he needs from his caregiving environment. If his needs are simple and he can get what he wants easily, he's labeled an "easy baby"; if he does not adapt readily, he is labeled "difficult."" - Dr. William Sears.
To empathise with our newborns feelings we need to put ourselves in their place, to imagine experiencing their world - but which world? The world they have spent most of their life in, their 'womb world' or the world they are in now - our world. To fully understand we must appreciate the enormous transition they have made - a concept known to many as 'The Fourth Trimester' -some make the womb to world transition easily, others less so and it is this latter group in particular "the clingy babies" we can learn so much from through this concept.

So lets quickly compare the two different 'worlds' your baby has lived in:

Pretty different huh? On top of this the big thing to understand is that in utero the baby's world was constant, each day was the same, the stimulation didn't change, but now they are born each day is different - ever changing, ever stimulating!

The concept of the fourth trimester helps us to understand the transition a newborn must make over their first few weeks earthside and once we understand we find so many ways we can help - but to me the most important facet of the fourth trimester is parental understanding and empathy, once that exists everything else will flow naturally.
Movement
Here are some common newborn calming techniques that tend to work quite well, but remember each and every baby is different, if you don't already know, you will soon learn what your baby likes best and that's what matters, that it is unique to *your* baby. Prescriptive 'do this/don't do this' baby calming lists don't help anybody - because they forget they are dealing with individuals - both parents and babies! Some things on this list will be inappropriate for you and your baby, some simply won't work, some you won't like - and that's OK! because really it isn't about these tips it's about you and your baby getting to know each other!
Skin to Skin Contact
The womb is a constantly moving space, Braxton Hicks would squeeze your baby at the end of pregnancy and each time you moves your baby was wobbled around inside. Imagine how walking upstairs feels for a baby in utero! Babies tend to love movement but so often we put them down somewhere completely still. You could try dancing, swaying from side to side, going for an exaggerated quick walk or bumpy car ride.
Bed-Sharing
Such a brilliant baby calmer! Being in contact with your warm, naturally (un)scented, skin is heaven for a baby, it helps to stabilise their body temperature, heart rate and stress hormones and stimulates the release of oxytocin - the love and bonding hormone - in you both. Topless cuddles, shared baths, baby massage and bedsharing are all great skin to skin experiences for your baby and you.

Sharing a bed with your baby is an amazing way of getting more sleep for everyone, babies are generally much calmer and sleep more easily if they sleep with you in your bed, yet it is such a taboo topic and although 60% of parents will share a bed with their baby at some point it's a subject that makes society very uncomfortable, but...it is an *amazing* baby calmer! It's really important that you think about how bedsharing will work and follow some important safety guidelines HERE.
Swaddling
For more on bedsharing and other ways to improve your newborn's sleep, watch my free webinar here:

Imagine how snug your baby was at the very end of your pregnancy inside of you - now imagine how strange it must feel to them after they have been born and have so much space around them! The absolutely best thing you can do is to envelop your baby in your arms, but for times when you don't want to or indeed can't then swaddling is an option. Swaddling is becoming increasingly popular, however there are important safety guidelines to be followed if you choose to swaddle your baby, if you are breastfeeding please make sure feeding is established before swaddling and take care not to miss your baby's hunger cues if you are feeding on demand:
** The American Academy of Paediatrics recommends swaddling for babies 0-14wks. Babywearing

Never swaddle over your baby's head or near his face

Never swaddle your baby if he is ill or has a fever

Make sure your baby does not overheat and only swaddle with a breathable/thin fabric

Only swaddle your baby until he can roll over**

Always place your baby to sleep on his back

Do not swaddle tightly across your baby's chest

Do not swaddle tightly around your baby's hips and legs, his legs should be free to "froggy up" into a typical newborn position.

Lastly start to swaddle as soon as possible, do not swaddle a 3 month old baby if he has not been swaddled before.

Wearing your baby in a sling is one of the ultimate ways to keep them calm and happy. It increases the time a baby spends in a state of "quiet alertness" - a time of contentment when they learn the most. When a baby is in utero they spend 100% of their time in physical contact with us - yet the moment they are born this is estimated to drop to only 40%! Babywearing also means 2 free hands!

Choose your sling carefully. A good sling will be easy to use and will support both yours and your baby's spine whilst not placing any pressure on your baby's growing hips - newborns should always be carried facing inwards with a "frog leg" pose, not a crotch dangle pose so commonly used by commercial baby carriers. Also seek to carry in an 'in arms' position - i.e: how your baby would be held if you were holding them!

Babywearing is a great way for dads to bond with babies!
Position
It is quite common for a baby to cry once placed in a sling, this does not mean that they hate the sling - it just means that you need to move, so get dancing! As with swaddling,babywearing is becoming increasingly popular, however there are important safety guidelines to be followed, the TICKS acronym below neatly sums them all up:

The "tiger in the tree" position below, taken from baby yoga, is often magical, stopping a crying baby in an instant!
Feed
Noise
Babies love sound, but for many not the sound you might think. For many babies a hoover is much more calming to a baby than a lullaby. A special white noise recording, such as , can be played on loop whilst your baby sleeps to help keep them calm.
Deep Bathing
If your baby is hungry nothing will calm him, so watch for his hunger cues. Feeding is always better if it is baby led, not led by a routine - whether you are breast or bottle feeding. Remember as well that your baby may not always be hungry for a full feed, they may want a quick drink, a quick snack or just some comfort sucking. Babies also find sucking the ultimate relaxation and comfort tool. Sucking helps a baby's skull bones to return to their normal position after birth as well as providing them with comfort and security. If you are not breastfeeding you might find your baby will relax when given a dummy/pacifier.
Outside
The womb is a wet, warm place. The world as we know it is dry and cold! Sometimes a nice deep, warm bath can stop a baby's tears in seconds - even better if mummy or daddy goes in the big bath with baby too as skin to skin contact is a wonderful baby calmer.
What have you found calms your newborn? The NEWLY UPDATED Gentle Sleep Book - out now! If you would like to understand and learn how to improve your baby's sleep WITHOUT cry-based conventional sleep training, this is the book for you! p.s: Come and chat with me on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram Or watch my videos on YouTube You can also sign up for my free parenting newsletter HERE.
If all else fails many babies stop crying the minute they hit the open air - I'm not sure if this is because we are usually moving (e.g.: walking over cobbles with the buggy/ bouncing in a sling and the drone and movement of a car) or because of the change in air - but it works!

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The Fourth Trimester - AKA Why Your Newborn Baby is Only Happy in Your Arms

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"My baby is only happy in my arms, the minute I put her down she cries" "He sleeps really well but only when he's laying on my chest, he hates his moses basket" "She cries every time we lay her on ...

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I was recently asked by a newly graduated midwife for any better tips on "winding" babies. I asked the midwife what she had been taught in university on this subject, she thought about it and replied "nothing". We talked about why the university had not taught her how to 'wind a baby' and where our knowledge on this subject comes from.

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Derby Eco Toy Store, Sling & Nappy Library

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Cariad Babi - Derby Eco Toy Store, Sling & Nappy Library

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Derby Sling Library, Cloth Nappy library and Eco Store, based full time at The PoD. Book online for an appointment with our trained sling consultant...

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We can't imagine there's a family medicine cabinet out there that doesn't have a bottle of Calpol in it. And quite a few of us here at MFM HQ don't really feel 'covered for all possibilities' if we take the kids out for the day without a couple of 'just-in-case' sachets of the stuff stowed in our changing bag, along with the spare nappies and wet wipes.

So, it's a bit of a worry when we see headlines - as we did towards the end of 2015 - warning that Calpol and other paracetamol-based child medicines - can be dangerous, and that we need might need to rethink how we use them or risk damaging our children's health.

After all, we've probably all done it: given our kids a dose of Calpol when they're a bit grizzly or not quite themselves but not necessarily, categorically, properly ill. But, by doing this, are we unknowingly putting our children's health at risk?

The short answer is almost certainly no. But, to help us all work out how to do our best for our children when they're not well, we've taken a look behind the scary headlines to try to pinpoint the proper facts.

So, here are 5 Calpol facts (and other paracetamol-based child medicines) that every parent really needs to know...

1. It's a brilliant medicine - as long you know why your child's ill

First off, it has to be said that, when you know what's ailing your child, and you know they're in pain from, say, a sore throat or an earache, Calpol and other paracetamol-based medicines can do absolute wonders at making it all feel better. Even Professor Alastair Sutcliffe of University College London, the 'top paediatrician' mentioned in the headline above, told MFM he agrees that it's a fab product to have handy.

But what Professor Sutcliffe also says is that it's really important that we don't just reach for the Calpol without finding out first what's making our child ill. "If your child has a fever and is off food, and has not caught a known bug that's going round," he says, "then the first thing he or she needs is a diagnosis [from a healthcare professional] and not blind Calpol."

2. It might not always be the best thing for a mild fever

Now, the jury's still out on this one and more research needs to be done, but many child-health experts, including Professor Sutcliffe, now say that a low-grade fever is often a short-lived thing - and the body's natural response to infection. And, if this is the case, giving a child with a mild fever Calpol - to help bring his or her temperature down - could actually mean the child stays ill for longer.

"Fever is a body defence to stop bugs breeding," explains the professor, "so giving Calpol may extend the illness." But, he adds, there needs to be more testing to confirm this.

Still, if your child has only a slight fever (37.5C to 38C) and doesn't seem otherwise unwell, it might be better, as a first step, not to reach for the Calpol but to trying cooling things off by stripping him or her down. Then keep a close eye on your child's temperature to make sure it's not getting higher (if which case Calpol and/or a trip to the doctor might be in order). Check our guide to baby fevers for more helpful information

3. Overuse can harm your child's health in the long-term

And cue the scary headlines. The notion that we could be seriously damaging our children's health came out in the news after Professor Sutcliffe was reported stating that, over time, chronic use of Calpol (or other paracetamol-based medicines) could lead to a child developing kidney, heart and liver damage.

And, yes, he did say this, but it's important to put it into context. He said that this kind of serious health problem would only affect some children and, most importantly, it would generally only be triggered by chronic Calpol usage over time.

In other words, you're extremely unlikely to damage your child's kidneys, liver or heart with Calpol unless you're dosing your child up with the stuff on a really regular basis for weeks on end.

4. It's important to be careful about dosage

OK, so we all know we should follow the instructions on the bottle and only give our child the correct, age-appropriate dose of Calpol, repeated (if needed) at the correct recommended intervals in any 24 hours.

Where it can sometimes go wrong, though, is when you're sharing childcare between relatives or childminders, and someone else gives your child a dose of Calpol, forgets to tell you and then you give another one.

"I have seen a child die," Professor Sutcliffe tells us,"from being given double doses, accidentally, for 4 days."

Pretty frightening, but, before you panic about an accidental extra dose you may have given, "it is not dangerous to have an extra dose," stresses the professor, "provided you stick within the TOTAL dose recommendations for any 24-hour period."

Best of all, if you are sharing childcare between relatives or childminders, do try and make sure everyone's keeping a record of how much medicine your child's having and at when. Something as simple as securing a Post-it note to the Calpol bottle (with an elastic band) and asking people to note down on it the time and date of the dose, and how much they've given, can work really well.

5. Paracetamol use in babies under 6 months is linked to child asthma (but the risk is still small)

A recent (2016) study, carried out by the Norwegian Institute of Public Health, the University of Oslo and the University of Bristol, highlighted a possible link between children under the age of 6 months taking paracetamol and an increased risk of developing child asthma.

While it was a large, well-regarded study, which does indeed seem to suggest a child given paracetamol in his or her first 6 months has a 27% to 29% increased risk of getting child asthma, it's important to know that that the risk of your child getting asthma is low in the first place. So, as scary as though percentage increases may sound, they are actually a percentage of a very small number - meaning your child's risk of developing asthma still remain pretty low.

(It may also be worth knowing that this study also looked at the increased risk of child asthma for babies whose mothers took paracetamol while they were pregnant - with similar results. The guidelines on pregnant women taking paracetamol have not changed; do take a look out our guidance on what medicines are OK to take when you're pregnant.)

Anything else I need to know?

We'll keep updating this article on Calpol facts every time there is any more research on children and paracetamol.

In the meantime, what do you do days when your child's just grizzly but not really ill? We know that Capol isn't the right answer but we do wish there was a Capol Light (or something) - a medicine with a similar look, texture and taste but without the paracetamol content, a kind of placebo Calpol we could give our kids as a comforter to make them feel a bit better when they're under the weather but don't really need medication.

But what does Professor Sutcliffe think of that idea? "I would very much like to know what would be in this mixture!" he told us. "But, as long as it is not harmful, I would be sympathetic." Oooh, watch this space...

Read more

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We can't imagine there's a family medicine cabinet out there that doesn't have a bottle of Calpol in it. And quite a few of us here at MFM HQ don't really feel 'covered for all possibilities' if we take the kids out for the day without a couple of 'just-in-case' sachets of the stuff stowed in our changing bag, along with the spare nappies and wet wipes.

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Tummy time, the recommended practice of putting a baby prone on the floor (whether they like it or not), feels deeply connected to the experience of raising a baby in America. But look into baby books published prior to the 1990s and there's no mention of the practice.

There's a good reason for that. Before 1994, tummy time did not exist.
READ MORE: The Fatherly Guide to SIDS
Until the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) started recommending that babies sleep on their backs to prevent Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, nobody spoke about tummy time. The recommendation for back-sleeping saved countless lives, but at a developmental cost - infants who would have learned to crawl in their cribs were put on their backs at a time when rolling over, pushing up, and crawling muscles were ripe to develop. The story of how tummy time emerged as the best way to get kids crawling safely is one of unintended consequences, and a modern example of how society and science can shape childhood development in real time.

A look into why tummy time is recommended in the first place offers clues as to how it came to be. Pediatricians say placing children on their bellies is meant to get them to push up on their arms, stretch their necks, and look around. This helps develop the muscles needed to progress toward milestones known as "prone skills", which include rolling over, pushing up, and crawling.

"The more waking hours babies spend on their tummy, the earlier on average they will roll over, push up in a prone position, called prone prop, and crawl," Dr. Karen Adolph, director of the NYU Infant Action Laboratory told Fatherly. Babies, it turns out, aren't big fans of being face down. "Babies don't really like being on their tummy because it takes more work to fight gravity."

But if tummy time is a relatively new phenomenon, how did kids manage to build strong muscles prior to the now-mandatory prone workouts? They did it in their cribs, of course.

In 1994, AAP began telling parents that babies should be placed on their backs to sleep. The so-called Back-to-Sleep initiative launched in response to data that suggested that children who sleep on their tummies are more susceptible to SIDS. The campaign-led by pediatricians and supported by pamphlets, ads, and posters-was a smashing success. In response, many parents began putting their babies to sleep in supine positions. And SIDS deaths did decline.

A few years later, however, pediatricians began to notice that back-sleeping was slowing down movement milestone acquisition, particularly for the prone skills. In 1998, a longitudinal study of 350 babies showed that, indeed, back sleepers were arriving at the rolling over and crawling milestones later in life.

"Babies who went to sleep on the tummy might wake up in the middle of the night. Or they might wake up before they start fussing and the parent comes to get them," says Adolph. "All that time they're pushing up in prone and lifting their head out of the mattress."

But letting babies sleep prone wasn't an option, so tummy time was born and AAP released a revised campaign-Back-to-Sleep, Front-to-Play. Pediatricians now recommend that tummy time begin as soon as possible, starting with 2-5 minutes of supervised, front-down play.

Despite this initiative, however, prone skills are still slightly delayed in kids who sleep on their backs and rely on tummy time - perhaps due to iffy compliance. "A lot of babies cry because it's a lot more trouble than lying on their back and having their parents bring everything to them," Adolph says. "So the parents are loath to keep them on their tummy because they're fussy."

Not that meeting milestones really matters in the grand scheme of things. Adolph notes that the acquisition of movement milestones varies greatly based on differences in childrearing practices linked to historical, cultural, and ethnic groups. The window for achieving these milestones can span months and, of course, even if parents spurn tummy time and fail to encourage their children to reach milestones, kids figure out how to crawl eventually. Far more interesting, Adolph says, is that the tummy time phenomenon is just one example of how differences in parenting practices can influence child development. At the turn of the 19th century, babies were also slower to crawl - because back then, most kids spent their earliest months in bulky christening gowns. "Log rolling" in this population, however, was common.

Adolph suspects that tummy time won't be the last parenting trope to affect how children develop in the United States, and beyond. "You don't have to go to Mali or Cameroon or some exotic location to see how child-rearing practices affect children's motor skills," she says.

"It happens in our own culture. It's happened in my lifetime."

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The Strange Reason Tummy Time Was Invented for Babies

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Tummy time, the recommended practice of putting a baby prone on the floor (whether they like it or not), feels deeply connected to the experience of raising a baby in America. But look into baby books published prior to the 1990s and there's no mention of the practice.

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Hello. I'm Lucy and I'm an antenatal educator, postnatal doula, breastfeeding advocate and yarn artist, working in Derbyshire and the surrounding areas.

I live in Belper with my partner, our two children, a dog and two cats.

I've been working with parents in the transition to parenthood since 2006 when my first baby was born. Following a career in higher education (I taught anatomy and physiology to undergraduates at City University) I found myself on maternity leave. Inspired by my NCT antenatal course, I joined NCT as a volunteer and was soon running postnatal support groups, organising branch events, and working on my face painting skills. I quickly realised that I needed to do more to support other women so, following the birth of my second child, I trained with ABM as a mother supporter, then with the NHS as a Breastfeeding Buddy. By 2015 I was training with NCT to become an Antenatal Practitioner, and in 2017 I added Postnatal Practitioner to my qualifications.

I currently run antenatal and postnatal courses across the region for NCT, as well as working privately as an antenatal and postnatal doula. I am an accredited Rebozo practitioner and a 3-Step Rewind birth trauma release practitioner.

I also have an Etsy shop, selling handmade teaching aids to birth folk all over the world. Please visit my The Crafty Lucy page for more information about my handmade, yarn crafted products.

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Lucy Pedder - Doula, Perinatal Practitioner, Yarn Artist

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Hello. I'm Lucy and I'm an antenatal educator, postnatal doula, breastfeeding advocate and yarn artist, working in Derbyshire and the surrounding areas. I live in Belper with my partner, our two children, a dog and two cats. I've been working with parents in the transition to parenthood since 2006 when my first baby was born.

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Here you can find out about parental leave, financial support, and help with childcare.

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We use some essential cookies to make this website work.

We'd like to set additional cookies to understand how you use GOV.UK, remember your settings and improve government services.

We also use cookies set by other sites to help us deliver content from their services.

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We use some essential cookies to make this website work. We'd like to set additional cookies to understand how you use GOV.UK, remember your settings and improve government services. We also use cookies set by other sites to help us deliver content from their services.

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What are you entitled to?

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There's lots of benefits and entitlements available when you're pregnant or have a baby, including maternity benefits, the Sure Start Maternity Grant, as well as benefits you can claim if you're pregnant and unemployed or on a low income.
What benefits can I claim when I'm pregnant?

Free prescriptions and NHS dental treatment

What is it?

Who gets it?

All women who are pregnant or who gave birth less than a year ago.

How to claim

Fill out the Maternity Exemption form (FW8), available from your doctor or midwife.

Find out more about free prescriptions and NHS dental treatment

What benefits can I claim if I'm working and having a baby?

Paid time off for antenatal care

What is it?

No matter how long you've been in your job, you have a right to paid time off from work to go to your antenatal appointments.

This time off is in addition to your annual leave.

Antenatal care includes:

medical and midwife appointments

doctor-recommended appointments like relaxation or parenting classes.

Your time off should include travel time to and from each appointment.

The baby's father or your partner (this includes same sex partners) are entitled to take unpaid time off work to go with you to two of your antenatal appointments (with the maximum time capped at 6 hours and 30 minutes for each appointment).

Who gets it?

Employed pregnant women.

How to claim

Tell your employer when your antenatal appointments are happening. Try to give them as much notice as you can to help with work planning.

It might be a good idea to go during quiet times at work or outside working hours if you can.

Find out more about paid time off for antenatal care in England, Wales and Scotland on GOV.UK and in Northern Ireland on NI Direct

Statutory Maternity Leave and Pay

What is Statutory Maternity Leave and Pay?

When you have a baby, you're entitled to a year's maternity leave and pay from your employer for up to 39 weeks while you're on leave, if you're eligible.

Who gets it?

Employed pregnant women.

To get Statutory Maternity Pay you must have:

average earnings of at least £116 per week, and

been working for your employer for at least 26 weeks.

How much is Statutory Maternity Pay?

You get Statutory Maternity Pay for 39 weeks of your 52-week maternity leave.

The table below shows how much Statutory Maternity Pay is in the 2018-19 tax year:

Statutory Maternity Leave

Statutory Maternity Pay

The first six weeks

90% of your average weekly earnings before tax

The next 33 weeks

£145.18 or 90% of your average weekly earnings - whichever is less

The next 13 weeks (if taken)

Unpaid

How to claim

To get maternity leave, you need to tell your employer when you want to stop working by the 15th week before the baby's due date.

You need to give your employer at least 28 days' notice that you want to start Statutory Maternity Pay, and give them proof you're pregnant.

Find out more about Statutory Maternity Leave and Pay

Maternity Allowance

What is Maternity Allowance?

Fortnightly or monthly payment from the government if you can't claim Statutory Maternity Pay.

Who gets it?

Pregnant women and new mums who can't claim Statutory Maternity Pay because:

How much is Maternity Allowance?

The amount you get is based on how much you earn.

Depending on your earnings, in the 2018-19 tax year you could get either:

£145.18 per week or 90% of your average weekly earnings (whichever is less) for up to 39 weeks

£27 per week for up to 14 weeks.

How to claim

Fill in the Maternity Allowance (MA1) claim form or call Jobcentre Plus (0800 055 6688) or Jobs and Benefits Office in Northern Ireland (0289 033 6000) for a form.

Statutory Paternity Leave and Pay

What is Statutory Paternity Leave and Pay?

One or two weeks' paid time off work so you can help look after your new baby.

Who gets it?

You must be:

You must also:

How much is Statutory Paternity Pay?

You get Statutory Paternity Pay for one or two weeks of your paternity leave.

In the 2018-19 tax year you'll get £145.18 per week or 90% of your average weekly earnings, whichever is lower.

How to claim

Give your employer Form SC3 at least 15 weeks before the week the baby is due.

Up to 50 weeks' parental leave and 37 weeks' pay shared with your partner if you're eligible.

Who gets it?

If you you live in England, Wales or Scotland, you might be eligible.

The child's mother must end her maternity leave and maternity pay or Maternity Allowance before either parent can get Shared Parental Leave or Pay.

You can get Statutory Shared Parental Pay if you're employed and you're eligible for either:

Statutory Maternity Pay or Statutory Adoption Pay

Statutory Paternity Pay and your partner is eligible for Statutory Maternity Pay, Maternity Allowance or Statutory Adoption Pay.

In the 2018-19 tax year you'll get £145.18 per week or 90% of your average weekly earnings, whichever is lower.

How to claim

You must give notice to your employer in writing if you want Statutory Shared Parental Leave and Pay.

GOV.UK has downloadable forms you can use to give notice.

Statutory Adoption Leave and Pay

What is Statutory Adoption Leave and Pay?

When you adopt or have a child through surrogacy, you're entitled to a year off work and up to 39 weeks' Statutory Adoption Pay.

Who gets it?

Only one person in a couple can take adoption leave and pay. The other person could be eligible for paternity leave and pay.

You must be an employee and have been:

working for your employer for 26 weeks by the time you're matched with a child or by the 15th week before the baby is due

earning an average of at least £116 per week.

How much is Statutory Adoption Pay?

You get Statutory Adoption Pay for up to 39 weeks of your Statutory Adoption Leave.

The table below shows how much Statutory Adoption Pay is in the 2018-19 tax year:

Statutory Adoption Leave

Statutory Adoption Pay

The first six weeks

90% of your average weekly earnings before tax

The next 33 weeks

£145.18 or 90% of your average weekly earnings - whichever is less

The next 13 weeks (if taken)

Unpaid

How to claim

Tell your employer you want to take adoption leave and when you want it to start.

You should tell them within seven days of being told by the adoption agency you've been matched with a child.

If you use a surrogate to have a baby, tell your employer the due date and when you want to start your leave at least 15 weeks before the baby is due.

Find out more about Statutory Adoption Pay

Working Tax Credit

What is Working Tax Credit?

A payment from the government to help top up your earnings if you work and are on a low income.

The 'childcare element' can cover up to 70% of your childcare costs if you're eligible.

Who gets it?

You normally need to be aged 25 or over

You might also be able to claim if you're over 16 and have a child or a disability.

You might be able to claim the childcare element of Working Tax credit if you:

pay for childcare

work at least 16 hours a week.

How much is Working Tax Credit?

How much you get depends on your circumstances, including:

your income

how many hours you work

whether you have children

whether you have a disability

whether you pay for childcare.

Use GOV.UK's tax credits calculator to see how much you could get.

How to claim

Call the Tax credit helpline (0345 300 3900) for a claim form.

What benefits can I claim if I'm not working or on a low income?

Employment and Support Allowance (ESA)

What is it?

A benefit paid if you are unable to work because of sickness or disability.

Who gets it?

If you can't work because of a pregnancy-related illness and you can't claim Statutory Sick Pay.

Employment and Support Allowance can be paid until the 11th week before your baby's due date (the 29th week of your pregnancy).

After the 29th week, you might be able to claim Income Support if you don't qualify for Statutory Maternity Pay or Maternity Allowance.

Find out more about Employment and Support Allowance on the GOV. UK website

Income Support

What is it?

If you don't qualify for Maternity Allowance or Statutory Maternity pay and are unemployed or on a low income, you might be able to claim Income Support while you're pregnant.

Who gets it?

You can get Income Support while you're pregnant and can't work from 11 weeks before the baby's due date to 15 weeks after its birth.

If you're a lone parent you can continue to get Income Support up until your child reaches age 5.

To get Income Support you must:

be aged 16 or over

work less than 16 hours a week

have less than £16,000 in savings

have no income or be on a low income.

Your partner or spouse's income and savings will also count and they must be working less than 24 hours a week.

Income Support is being replaced by Universal Credit. You will be told if you should apply for it when you make your claim.

How much is Income Support?

The amount of Income Support you'll get depends on your circumstances but you'll get at least £57.90 a week.

When the baby is born you will also be able to claim Child Benefit and Child Tax Credit.

Sure Start Maternity Grant

What is the Sure Start Maternity Grant?

A one-off payment from the Social Fund to help with the cost of your baby.

Who gets it?

You'll get the grant if your new baby is the only child under 16 in your family and you or your partner get one of the following benefits:

Pension Credit

Income Support

Universal Credit

Income-based Jobseeker's Allowance

Income-related Employment and Support Allowance

Child Tax Credit at a higher rate than the family element

Working Tax Credit which includes a disability or severe disability element.

How much is the Sure Start Maternity Grant?

£500

How to claim?

Fill in the Sure Start Maternity Grant (SF100) claim form.

If you live in Northern Ireland you can download a claim pack from nidirect.

Find out more about Sure Start Maternity Grant on GOV.UK.

Healthy Start food vouchers

What are Healthy Start food vouchers?

Weekly vouchers for free:

Who gets it?

You'll get the vouchers if you're at least 10 weeks pregnant or have a child under four and you and your family get one of the following benefits:

Income Support

Income-based Jobseeker's Allowance

Income-related Employment Support Allowance

Child Tax Credit if your family's income is £16,190 or less and you're not getting Working Tax Credit

Working Tax Credit if you are receiving Working Tax Credit run-on. A run-on might be paid to you in the four weeks after you have stopped working enough hours to qualify for Working Tax Credit.

Universal Credit if your household is earning £408 or less a month.

Working Tax Credit run-on. This is the payment you receive for four weeks after you have stopped working for 16 hours or more per week (single adults).

You also qualify for Healthy Start Food Vouchers if you're not getting one of these benefits yourself but you live with your partner and they get the benefit.

If you're under 18 and pregnant you can also get Healthy Start vouchers, even if you don't get any of the above benefits.

How much are Healthy Start food vouchers?

pregnant women and children aged one to four get £3.10 per week

children under one get £6.20 per week.

How to claim

Speak to your midwife, health visitor or doctor, or call Healthy Start on 0845 607 6823.

If you're claiming Universal Credit and you're pregnant or have a child under four years old, call Healthy Start on 0345 607 6823 or email onhelpdesk@tiu.org.uk to find out more about the Healthy Start scheme.

What benefits can I claim when I've had a baby?

Child Benefit

What is Child Benefit?

Child Benefit is a regular payment of money from the government to help with the cost of raising a child.

Only one person can claim Child Benefit and you can claim for every child you're responsible for.

Who gets it?

Anyone responsible for a child under 16 (or under 20 if they're in education or training).

How much is Child Benefit?

The rates for the 2018-19 tax year are:

£20.70 per week for the eldest or only child

£13.70 per week for each additional child.

How to claim
Download a claim form (CH2) from GOV.UK
If either of you earn over £50,000 a year

If either you or your partner have an income of more than £50,000 a year, you'll have to pay back some or all of your Child Benefit in the form of extra Income Tax. But it could still be worth applying to help protect your state pension.

Child Tax Credit

What is Child Tax Credit?

An annual payment from the government to help with the cost of raising a child.

Who gets it?

Anyone responsible for a child under 16 (or under 20 if they're in education or training).

How much is Child Tax Credit?

How much you get depends on your circumstances, including:

How many children are covered?

If you're already claiming and your child was born before 6 April 2017, there is no limit about how many children you can claim Child Tax Credits for.

However, for new claimants and those with children born on or after the 6 April 2017, you'll only be able to claim Child Tax Credits for the first two children (except in the case of multiple births).

If you're already claiming Child Tax Credit or Universal Credit and have more than two children, you won't be affected by the changes.

How to claim

Call the Tax credit helpline (0345 300 3900) for a claim form.

What benefits can I claim if I'm studying?

If you're at school, college or university and have a child, you could qualify for financial help to cover everything from living expenses and learning costs, to travel and childcare.

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What benefits can I claim when I'm pregnant or have a baby?

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There's lots of benefits and entitlements available when you're pregnant or have a baby, including maternity benefits, the Sure Start Maternity Grant, as well as benefits you can claim if you're pregnant and unemployed or on a low income. What is it? Who gets it?

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Here you can find lots of information on how and when to register the birth of your baby.

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How to register your baby’s birth | Life as a parent articles & support | NCT

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Here’s a how-to guide to registering a birth in the UK, including where to register a birth, how soon you have to do it and what you need with you.

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Belper Cloth Nappy Library. 47 likes. Belper Cloth Nappy Library helps people to find out more about using reusable nappies and wipes. It will offer affordable cloth nappy hire to local parents and...

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So you have decided to buy a sling or carrier to carry your little one? Welcome to the wonderful world of babywearing. The next question is what type will you choose? What are the differences? This article will guide you through the array of slings and baby carriers that are now on the market.

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Once you understand the different types of sling that are available on the market it is time to consider which option will best suit you and your family. Things to take into consideration will include how you wish to wear the sling, whether you intend to keep the baby in the sling or keep removing from the sling, if you require a sling to provide discreet breastfeeding and also how willing you are to practise using your sling until you get it right.

If you are now ready to venture out into the wonderful world of babywearing, these tips on buying your first baby sling and some advice for using a sling may help you.

If you are still a little unsure, why not find out about a little more about babywearing itself or the benefits of babywearing for your baby and for you?

Armed with this information it just remains to wish you and your child many hours of very happy babywearing!

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So you have decided to buy a sling or carrier to carry your little one? Welcome to the wonderful world of babywearing. The next question is what type will you choose? What are the differences? This article will guide you through the array of slings and baby carriers that are now on the market.

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Adam Miconi, Ryan Steinbeigle, National Center on Shaken Baby syndrome, Period of PURPLE Crying

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The Period of PURPLE Crying is the phrase used to describe the time in a baby's life when they cry more than any other time.

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Many things can cause a rash in babies and children, and they're often nothing to worry about.
This page covers some of the common rashes in babies and children.

As a parent, you may know if your child seems seriously unwell and should trust your judgement.

Do not drive to A&E. Ask someone to drive you or call 999 and ask for an ambulance.

Bring any medicines you take with you.

Rash with a high temperature

Rash on cheeks with high temperature

A rash on 1 or both cheeks plus a high temperature, runny nose, sore throat and headache may be slapped cheek syndrome.

Slapped cheek syndrome can usually be treated at home.

Slapped cheek symptoms and what to do

Check if it's slapped cheek syndrome

The first sign of slapped cheek syndrome is usually feeling unwell for a few days.

Symptoms may include:

How long it lasts

The rash usually fades within 1 to 3 weeks, but it can sometimes last for longer, especially if you're hot or stressed.

Adults might also have joint pain and stiffness. This can happen in children too, but it's rare. Joint pain can continue for many weeks, even after the other symptoms have gone.

How to treat slapped cheek syndrome yourself

You do not usually need to see a GP for slapped cheek syndrome.

There are some things you can do to ease the symptoms.

Blisters on hands and feet plus mouth ulcers

Blisters on the hands and feet, with ulcers in the mouth, could be hand, foot and mouth disease.

Hand, foot and mouth disease can usually be treated at home.

Hand, foot and mouth symptoms and what to do

Check if it's hand, foot and mouth disease

The 1st symptoms of hand, foot and mouth disease can be:

The 2nd stage usually starts a few days later and symptoms can include:

mouth ulcers, which can be painful

a raised rash of spots on the hands and feet, and sometimes the groin area and bottom

The rash of spots can look pink, red, or darker than the surrounding skin, depending on your skin tone.

The spots can turn into blisters, which might be grey or lighter than surrounding skin and can be painful.

Symptoms are usually mild and are the same in adults and children.

How to treat hand, foot and mouth disease yourself

Hand, foot and mouth disease usually gets better on its own in 7 to 10 days. You cannot take antibiotics or other medicines to cure it.

To help the symptoms:

drink cool fluids to soothe the mouth and prevent dehydration (but avoid acidic drinks, such as fruit juice)

eat soft foods like yoghurt and avoid hot, salty and spicy foods

take paracetamol or ibuprofen to help ease a sore mouth or throat

A pharmacist can help with hand, foot and mouth disease

Ask a pharmacist for advice about treatments, such as mouth ulcer gels, sprays and mouthwashes, to relieve pain.

They can tell you which ones are suitable for children.

Rash on the face and body

A rash of small, raised bumps that feels rough, like sandpaper, could be scarlet fever.

Speak to a GP if you think your child has scarlet fever.

Scarlet fever symptoms and what to do

Check if you have scarlet fever

The first signs of scarlet fever can be flu-like symptoms, including a high temperature, a sore throat and swollen neck glands (a large lump on the side of your neck).

A rash appears 12 to 48 hours later. It looks like small, raised bumps and starts on the chest and tummy, then spreads. The rash makes your skin feel rough, like sandpaper.

On white skin the rash looks pink or red. On brown and black skin it might be harder to see a change in colour, but you can still feel the rash and see the raised bumps.

A white coating also appears on the tongue. This peels, leaving the tongue red, swollen and covered in little bumps (called "strawberry tongue").

The rash does not appear on the face, but the cheeks can look red. The redness may be harder to see on brown and black skin.

The symptoms are the same for children and adults, although scarlet fever is less common in adults.

See a GP if you or your child:

have scarlet fever symptoms

do not get better in a week (after seeing a GP)

have scarlet fever and chickenpox at the same time

are ill again, weeks after scarlet fever got better - this can be a sign of a complication, such as rheumatic fever

are feeling unwell and have been in contact with someone who has scarlet fever

Scarlet fever is very easily spread. Check with a GP before you go in. They may suggest a phone consultation.

A spotty rash that appears on the head or neck and spreads to the rest of the body could be measles.

Speak to a GP if you think your child has measles.

Measles symptoms and what to do

Check if you or your child has measles

Measles usually starts with cold-like symptoms, followed by a rash a few days later. Some people may also get small spots in their mouth.

Cold-like symptoms

The first symptoms of measles include:

a high temperature

a runny or blocked nose

sneezing

a cough

red, sore, watery eyes

Spots in the mouth

Small white spots may appear inside the cheeks and on the back of the lips a few days later. These spots usually last a few days.

The measles rash

A rash usually appears a few days after the cold-like symptoms.

The rash starts on the face and behind the ears before spreading to the rest of the body.

The spots of the measles rash are sometimes raised and join together to form blotchy patches. They're not usually itchy.

The rash looks brown or red on white skin. It may be harder to see on brown and black skin.

Ask for an urgent GP appointment or get help from NHS 111 if:

you think you or your child may have measles

your child is under 1 year old and has come into contact with someone who has measles

you've been in close contact with someone who has measles and you're pregnant or have a weakened immune system

you or your child have a high temperature that has not come down after taking paracetamol or ibuprofen

you or your child have difficulty breathing - you may feel more short of breath than usual

your baby or young child is not feeding well, or taking less feeds or fluids than usual

you or your child are peeing less than usual (or your baby has fewer wet nappies)

you or your child feels very unwell, or you're worried something is seriously wrong

Measles can spread to others easily. Call your GP surgery before you go in. They may suggest talking over the phone.

You can also call 111 or get help from 111 online.

Rash with itching

Rash caused by heat

A rash of small, raised spots that feels itchy or prickly could be heat rash (prickly heat).

Heat rash can usually be treated at home.

Heat rash symptoms and what to do

Check if you have heat rash

The symptoms of heat rash are:

The rash looks red on white skin. It may be harder to see or look grey or white on brown or black skin.

The symptoms of heat rash are often the same in adults and children.

It can appear anywhere on the body and spread, but it cannot be passed on to other people.

How you can treat heat rash yourself

If you have heat rash the main thing to do is keep your skin cool so you do not sweat and irritate the rash.

To keep your skin cool

Wear loose cotton clothing.

Use lightweight bedding.

Take cool baths or showers.

Drink plenty of fluid to avoid dehydration.

To calm the itching or prickly feeling

A pharmacist can help with heat rash

Speak to a pharmacist about heat rash. They can give advice and suggest the best treatment to use.

A pharmacist might recommend:

calamine lotion

antihistamine tablets

hydrocortisone cream - though not for children under 10 as you'll need to get advice from a doctor before giving them this treatment

Scaly or cracked skin

Skin that's itchy, dry and cracked may be atopic eczema. It's common behind the knees, elbows and neck, but it can appear anywhere.

Speak to a GP if you think your child has eczema.
Find out more about atopic eczema
Raised, itchy spots or patches

Raised, itchy patches or spots could be caused by an allergic reaction (hives).

Hives can usually be treated at home. But call 999 if there's swelling around your child's mouth or they're struggling to breathe.

Hives symptoms and what to do

Check if it's hives

The main symptom of hives is an itchy rash.

The rash can:

be raised bumps or patches in many shapes and sizes

appear anywhere on the body

be on 1 area or spread across the body

feel itchy, sting or burn

look pink or red when affecting someone with white skin; the colour of the rash can be harder to see on brown and black skin

A pharmacist can help with hives

A pharmacist can give you advice about antihistamine treatment to help a hives rash.

Tell the pharmacist if you have a long-term condition, because you might not be able to take antihistamines.

This treatment might not be suitable for young children.

your lips, mouth, throat or tongue suddenly become swollen

you're breathing very fast or struggling to breathe (you may become very wheezy or feel like you're choking or gasping for air)

your throat feels tight or you're struggling to swallow

your skin, tongue or lips turn blue, grey or pale (if you have black or brown skin, this may be easier to see on the palms of your hands or soles of your feet)

you suddenly become very confused, drowsy or dizzy

someone faints and cannot be woken up

a child is limp, floppy or not responding like they normally do (their head may fall to the side, backwards or forwards, or they may find it difficult to lift their head or focus on your face)

You or the person who's unwell may also have a rash that's swollen, raised or itchy.

These can be signs of a serious allergic reaction and may need immediate treatment in hospital.

Itchy round rash

An itchy, dry, ring-shaped patch of skin may be ringworm. The patch may look red, pink, silver, or darker than surrounding skin.

Ringworm can usually be treated at home.

Ringworm symptoms and what to do

Check if it's ringworm

The main symptom of ringworm is a rash. It may look red or darker than the surrounding skin, depending on your skin tone.

The rash may be scaly, dry, swollen or itchy.

Ringworm can appear anywhere on the body, including the scalp (tinea capitis) and groin (jock itch).

A pharmacist can help with ringworm

Speak to a pharmacist first if you think you have ringworm.

They can look at the rash and recommend the best antifungal medicine. This might be tablets, cream, gel or spray depending on where the rash is.

You may need to use an antifungal medicine every day for up to 4 weeks. It's important to use it for the right amount of time, even if the rash has gone away.

A pharmacist will tell you if they think you should see a GP.

Small spots and blisters

Small, itchy spots that turn into blisters and scabs could be chickenpox.

Chickenpox can usually be treated at home.

Chickenpox symptoms and what to do

Check if it's chickenpox

An itchy, spotty rash is the main symptom of chickenpox. It can be anywhere on the body.

Chickenpox happens in 3 stages. But new spots can appear while others are becoming blisters or forming a scab.

Stage 1: small spots appear

The spots can:

be anywhere on the body, including inside the mouth and around the genitals, which can be painful

spread or stay in a small area

be red, pink, darker or the same colour as surrounding skin, depending on your skin tone

be harder to see on brown and black skin

Stage 2: the spots become blisters

The spots fill with fluid and become blisters. The blisters are very itchy and may burst.

Stage 3: the blisters become scabs

The spots form a scab. Some scabs are flaky while others leak fluid.

Other symptoms

Before or after the rash appears, you might also get:

Chickenpox is very itchy and can make children feel miserable, even if they do not have many spots.

The chickenpox spots look the same on children and adults. But adults usually have a high temperature for longer and more spots than children.

It's possible to get chickenpox more than once, but it's unusual.

How to treat chickenpox at home

Stay off school or work

You'll need to stay away from school, nursery or work until all the spots have formed a scab. This is usually 5 days after the spots appeared.

Itchy sores or blisters

Sores or blisters that burst and leave crusty, golden-brown patches could be impetigo. The sores or blisters can be itchy, get bigger or spread to other parts of the body.

Speak to a GP if you think your child may have impetigo.

Impetigo symptoms and what to do

Check if you have impetigo

Impetigo starts with red sores or blisters, but the redness may be harder to see on brown and black skin.

The sores or blisters quickly burst and often leave crusty, golden-brown patches.

The patches can:

See a GP if you or your child:

might have impetigo

has had treatment for impetigo but the symptoms have changed or become worse

had impetigo before and it keeps coming back

Impetigo is very infectious. Check with the GP before you go into the surgery. They may suggest a phone consultation.

Small and very itchy spots

Very itchy raised spots could be caused by tiny mites that burrow into the skin (scabies). There may be raised lines with a dot at one end, often first appearing between the fingers.

Scabies can usually be treated at home.

Scabies symptoms and what to do

Check if it's scabies

The symptoms of scabies are:

intense itching, especially at night

a raised rash or spots

The spots may look red. They are more difficult to see on brown or black skin, but you should be able to feel them.

The scabies rash usually spreads across the whole body, apart from the head and neck. It often affects skin between the fingers, around the wrists, under the arms, and around the waist, groin and bottom.

However, older people and young children may develop a rash on their head, neck, palms and soles of their feet.

People with a weakened immune system can sometimes get a rare and very contagious type of scabies, called crusted scabies. The main symptom is a crusted, flaky rash that often affects the elbows, knees, hands and feet.

A pharmacist can help with scabies

Scabies is not usually a serious condition, but it does need to be treated.

A pharmacist will recommend a cream or lotion that you apply over your whole body. It's important to read the instructions carefully.

Let the pharmacist know if you're breastfeeding or pregnant.

You'll need to repeat the treatment 1 week later.

Scabies is very infectious, but it can take up to 8 weeks for the rash to appear.

Everyone in your home needs to be treated at the same time, even if they do not have symptoms. But do not use pharmacy treatments on children under 2 years old, they will need to see a GP.

Anyone you've had sexual contact with in the past 8 weeks should also be treated.

Rash without fever or itching

Tiny spots on a baby's face

Very small spots, called milia, often appear on a baby's face when they're a few days old. Milia may appear white or yellow, depending on your baby's skin colour.

They usually go away within a few weeks and do not need treatment.

Red, yellow and white spots in babies

Raised red, yellow and white spots (erythema toxicum) can appear on babies when they're born. They usually appear on the face, body, upper arms and thighs.

The rash can disappear and reappear. It should get better in a few weeks without treatment.

Skin-coloured or pink spots

Small, firm, raised spots could be molluscum contagiosum. The spots can be the same colour as surrounding skin, darker than surrounding skin, or pink.

You can usually treat molluscum contagiosum at home.

Molluscum contagiosum symptoms and what to do

Check if it's molluscum contagiosum

Molluscum contagiosum is more common in children, but anyone can get it.

Usually, the only symptom of molluscum contagiosum is spots.

How to look after yourself or your child

The spots caused by molluscum contagiosum are usually harmless and should clear up within 18 months without needing treatment.

Molluscum contagiosum is contagious. It is usually passed on by direct skin to skin contact.

The chance of passing it on to other people during normal activities is small so you or your child should be able to carry on with your normal activities. If you are not sure, check with a GP.

There are some things you can do to help reduce the risk of the infection spreading and help ease any symptoms.

Red patches on a baby's bottom

If your baby has a red and sore bottom, it could be nappy rash.

Nappy rash can usually be treated at home.

Nappy rash symptoms and what to do

Check if your baby has nappy rash

Symptoms of nappy rash can include:

red or raw patches on your baby's bottom or the whole nappy area

skin that looks sore and feels hot to touch

scaly and dry skin

an itchy or painful bottom

your baby seeming uncomfortable or distressed

spots, pimples, or blisters on bottom (spots can appear red or brown, but may be less noticeable on brown and black skin)

Things you can do to help with nappy rash

Nappy rash can be treated and prevented by following some simple advice.

A pharmacist can help with nappy rash

If the rash is causing your baby discomfort, a pharmacist can recommend a nappy rash cream or medicine to treat it at home.

They may suggest using a thin layer of a barrier cream to protect the skin or giving your baby child's paracetamol for pain relief (only suitable for babies over 2 months old).

Pimples on the cheeks, nose and forehead

Spots that appear on a baby's cheeks, nose or forehead within a month after birth could be baby acne.

You do not need to treat baby acne. It usually gets better after a few weeks or months.

Yellow, scaly patches on the scalp

Yellow or white, greasy, scaly patches on your baby's scalp could be cradle cap.

Cradle cap can usually be treated at home.

Cradle cap symptoms and what to do

Check if your baby has cradle cap

The main symptom of cradle cap is patches of greasy, scaly skin.

It's usually found on the scalp and face, but sometimes affects the nappy area. It can look like:

patches of white or yellow greasy scales on the scalp and face that form a crust which might flake off

small, dry flakes of skin on the nappy area

The scales look similar on all skin tones. But the skin under the scales may look pink or red if your baby has white skin, or lighter or darker than the surrounding skin if your baby has brown or black skin.

It is not itchy or painful and does not bother your baby.

The cause of cradle cap is not clear, but it cannot be caught from other babies.

Things you can do to help with cradle cap

Your baby's hair may come away with the scales. Do not worry if this happens as it will soon grow back.

A pharmacist can help with cradle cap

You can ask a pharmacist about:

Page last reviewed: 11 June 2021
Next review due: 11 June 2024

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NHS information on common rashes in babies and children, such as chickenpox, eczema, impetigo, ringworm, scabies, slapped cheek syndrome and more.

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Crying | Information and support on babies & toddlers | NCT

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We are the charity that supports people as they become parents.

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Use your powers of observation

Keep a close eye on your baby's mood. We all know what it's like to get to the point of just having had enough:
'If they seem overwhelmed, maybe they need some peace and quiet.'
(Maggie, mum of three grown-up children; health visitor and sleep and parenting specialist)

Rules of distraction

Babies are both complex and simple creatures. One common theme in the tips you gave us was to distract your baby. They might be crying as if the world is about to end and then...oooo who is that funny baby I can see in the mirror...they flip straight to giggles. Why not try these distraction techniques:

'Walking around the room explaining what things are - lots of pointing. Handing them a cuddly toy they like. Or taking them outside (this works every time for us).'
(Charlie, mum to Zack, 14 months)

'He likes to look out the window and it seems to calm him when he's upset.'
(Beth, mum to Reece, six weeks)

'Looking in mirrors, going outside, and singing - it is all about distraction - well and maybe a cuddle too! '
(Andrew, dad to Zack, 14 months)

Watch our video to hear from mums and dads about their tips for coping with a crying baby

Keeping your cool

Don't shoot the messenger for asking the impossible of you, but babies can pick up on your stress, and lack of patience (so our parents say):

'Don't panic, they can smell your fear! Try to keep calm yourself and they can follow your cues.'
(Alex, dad to Evelyn, 14 months)

'Give each position at least a few mins. I think people (myself included) can want switch too quickly when baby doesn't immediately stop crying but they often they just need a few minutes to calm down.'
(Becca, mum to Jackson, 21 months)

'Calming baby can begin with calming you - breathe deep and slow to relax yourself - so you can better hear baby and respond to their needs. Connect with them through eye contact and touch, these techniques calm babies time and time again in class.'
(Laura, founder of an infant massage company)

Repetitive movements

Just like those nursery rhymes going round and round in your head, try repeating the following:

'My daughter, now two, loves having her bum patted. It's a sure fire way to get her to calm down. It was cute when she was tiny, less so now she is a grumpy trumpy toddler.'
(Sarah-Jane, Facebook)

'The best thing I do is make my own breathing go very deep and slow. Kinda like I'm sleeping. When you're really calm it helps the baby calm down. Then I hold their whole body really tight, pinning arms and legs down so that they're contained. Like in the womb.'
(Rosie, mum to Anna, 7 weeks)

'If you're able to get to their feet, holding their heels in your hands is very calming and relaxing. They feel very secure and safe like this. Hold as long as you like - it's an instant calmer!

'Gently stroke from the side of the big toe, following the bone to the heel. This is the equivalent of giving a back rub and is very soothing to the whole of the nervous system.'
(Barbara, Reflexologist)

Keeping them close

We hear this time and time again from parents. Babywearing, or just plain old cuddles seem to do the tricky to stop those cries:

'Sling, every time.'
(Skye, Facebook)

'Put baby in a sling and carry baby.'
(Emma G, Twitter)

'Gentle shhhh and hushing while holding them close so that they feel safe and secure.'
(Claire, Instagram)

'Slings all the way. And cuddles, and understanding and patience - and lots of tea/coffee for the grown ups .'
(Michelle, Facebook)

'I make sure we're both naked, calm talk continuously, and I hum so my chest vibrates.'
(Janice, mum to Dot, 4 months)

Read all about it

There are plenty of books out there that can help. Why not check out your local library or go online to find more golden nuggets of advice.

Think about their environment

It is a strange world out here for your baby. Often, trying to replicate elements of the womb environment can soothe your baby, as these parents can vouch for:

'Loud white noise and a cuddle. ❤'''
( Natalie)

'White noise and lights out.'
(Sarah, mum to Amber, 21 months)

Is it mealtime yet?

We get hangry (angry when we're hungry) and so does baby. A full tummy, or a good old suck on a dummy, a finger or their own thumb can work wonders:

'If it's mine [my baby] 95% of the times boobs will fix the problem. If they don't then something is seriously wrong!'
(Tara, Facebook)

'Pinky in mouth for a while if he's crying and can't get himself to sleep - he often then crashes out instantly.'
(Tessa, mum to Johnnie, 2 months)

'Crying takes a lot of energy, so a baby who cries a lot may be even hungrier than usual. So ignore the clock, and feed your baby when she seems to want it.'
(Kathryn, NCT practitioner)

'People sometimes comment on my daughter being a thumb sucker as a bad thing, others say I'm super lucky. I know which I'd rather - she has always used her thumb to calm down and soothe herself - it is a dream. Sometimes in those early days I'd even encourage her thumb towards her mouth to prompt her .'
(Zara, mum to Flo, 12 months)

Have you got the moves?

Your stress and tiredness levels might mean partying isn't top of your to do list. But why not give it a go - an impromptu dance around the living room, or another crazy move might be just the ticket to soothe those cries:

'I dance with him! Or walk him around the flat and talk to him....nothing ground-breaking but they work!'
(Polly, mum to Leo, 10 weeks)

'I've always found gently cuddling/rocking a baby while standing up to be pretty effective.'
(Laura, Twitter)

'We got an exercise ball and bounce on it gently with him, which pretty much always works - my I call it The Neutraliser!'
(Grant, dad to Kai, 2 months)

Get out of the house (and your pyjamas)

'I heard a heartbreaking story of one mum who didn't go out to baby groups because her baby was always crying. However, babies are very sociable, and are often much better out of the house than at home. And even if your baby does cry at baby group, everyone else will understand, and someone might even take your baby for a bit so you can have a cuppa and a break.'
(Kathryn, NCT practitioner)

Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby and general enquiries for parents, members and volunteers: 0300 330 0700.

You might find attending one of our Early Days groups helpful as they give you the opportunity to explore different approaches to important parenting issues with a qualified group leader and other new parents in your area.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activities are happening nearby.

Watch our coping with crying film.

The Purple Crying website looks in detail at the stage in your baby's life when they cry more than at any other time.

Understanding childhood also have a range of resources available online and to download, developed by child psychotherapists, including a leaflet on crying.

There's also useful information on the NHS website.

The NSPCC helpline provides help and support to thousands of parents and families.

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Keep a close eye on your baby's mood. We all know what it's like to get to the point of just having had enough: 'If they seem overwhelmed, maybe they need some peace and quiet.' (Maggie, mum of three grown-up children; health visitor and sleep and parenting specialist) Babies are both complex and simple creatures.

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A video exploring common, universal baby communication cues.

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Newborn Cues narrated - What is Your Baby Trying to Tell You?

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Bliss is a charity which supports families with premature or unwell babies.

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For babies born premature or sick | Bliss

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Our vision is that every baby born premature or sick in the UK has the best chance of survival and quality of life.

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NCT runs courses for parents

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NCT Baby First Aid courses are delivered by quality-assured British Red Cross trainers. Taking Baby First Aid training can help build your confidence as a parent, whether your child is under one year old or an older child of up to twelve years.

"Being a nervous new parent who has never done a Baby First Aid course before, this made me feel more confident, calmer and more assertive."

- New parent, Carl (Tower Hamlets)

What to expect

Our highly trained British Red Cross partners deliver a 2.5 hour session for small groups of new and expectant parents. You can even attend with your babe in arms (under six months old).

Topics covered include:

Unresponsive baby and child (breathing and not breathing)

Choking baby and child

Bleeding

Burns

Raised temperatures

Meningitis

Other First Aid courses

Some of our local NCT communities work with local providers (other than British Red Cross) to deliver first aid training and help prepare parents for their little ones' mishaps. You can check who is delivering the first aid course when you do your local search.

Find your local first aid course

Find your local course now to help you and your baby.

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NCT Baby First Aid courses are delivered by quality-assured British Red Cross trainers. Taking Baby First Aid training can help build your confidence as a parent, whether your child is under one year old or an older child of up to twelve years.

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Good tips on how to burp a baby

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The Many Ways of Burping Baby

Besides the pat on the back, effective burping requires two actions: holding baby in an upright position and applying pressure on baby's tummy (parents often forget this latter step). You seldom see a baby being burped in non-Western, breastfeeding cultures. The need for burping baby after feedings, or help "bringing up the wind," originated with the spread of bottle-feeding. The faster flow of milk from bottle nipples forces babies to gulp air in between closely-spaced swallows.

Breastfeeding infants have fewer problems with air in their tummies. They can control the flow of milk at the breast and so they suck with a slower rhythm that allows them to better coordinate breathing and swallowing. Also, breastfed babies tend to be fed in a more upright position and enjoy smaller, more frequent feedings - other conditions that lessen the swallowing of air. Yet burping baby is still necessary sometimes, even if they are breastfed, especially if they are fast feeders and/or mother has a strong milk ejection reflex.

Sit Baby Up Straight

To lessen the likelihood that baby will swallow air at the breast, feed baby in the upright position (at a 45 degree angle or greater). Help baby comfortably keep a tight seal during latch-on by supporting the weight of your breast and by wrapping baby around you rather than letting baby dangle away from the breast. Watch for signs that baby needs to burp during or after a feeding: she may balk at going to the other breast, she may squirm and grimace when you lay her down, or there may be a painful expression on her face. If baby is content, then burping baby is unnecessary-if she needed to burp at all. Don't feel you have failed if you don't manage to bring up a burp after every feeding. Babies often don't need to burp with snack-type feedings. After a big meal, it's usually worth putting in some patient effort into burping baby. As babies get older and more proficient at feeding, burping becomes less of an issue. Try these burping positions:

Over-the-Hand Burp

Sit baby on your lap and place the heel of your hand against her tummy, with her chin resting on the top of your hand. Lean baby forward, resting most of her weight against the heel of your hand to provide counter pressure on her tummy, and pat her on the back to move up the air bubbles.

Burping Baby Over-the-Shoulder

Drape baby way up over your shoulder so that your shoulder presses against her tummy, then rub or pat her back. Hold baby securely by hooking your thumb under her armpit. If she's on your right shoulder, do this holding with your right hand.

Over-the-Lap Burp

Drape baby over one thigh (legs crossed or spread) so that it presses upward against her tummy. Support baby's head with one hand while you pat or rub her back with the other hand.

Burping Baby With One-Arm

This position is particularly helpful when you're burping baby while you're busy. You can simply stroll around the house and have one hand free. The only drawback is that spit-up may go on the floor or down over your arm and baby's legs.

Sling Burping

If the air just won't come up, place baby upright against your chest and wear her in a sling until the air comes up.

Nighttime Burping

Burping baby is often not necessary during night feedings, since babies feed in a more relaxed manner and therefore swallow less air. If a trapped air bubble seems to be causing nighttime discomfort, you can avoid sitting up and going through the whole burping ritual by draping baby up over your hip as you lie on your side.

Burp and Switch

Some babies are more comfortable if they burp when changing sides. Getting the air up makes room for more milk. This can help avoid large spit-ups when a bubble gets trapped under the milk.

Knee-to-Chest Burp

Sometimes babies need help not only getting air out the top end, but also out the bottom. The knee-chest position (flexing baby's knees up against her chest) helps baby pass excess gas.
If you would like to work with a Certified Health Coach during your pregnancy, or postpartum, you can find a Coach in your area.

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Besides the pat on the back, effective burping requires two actions: holding baby in an upright position and applying pressure on baby's tummy (parents often forget this latter step). You seldom see a baby being burped in non-Western, breastfeeding cultures. The need for burping baby after feedings, or help "bringing up the wind," originated with the spread of bottle-feeding.

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NCT leaflet

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Babies are much more vulnerable than adults to meningitis.  With the right information about signs and symptoms, you'll be able to recognise meningitis earlier and get the help your baby needs.

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A checklist of things to look for if you are worried about your baby.

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Information about how to and why wear your baby.

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Carrying Matters - carrying is connection

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The simple act of connecting with a small person has powerful and long-lasting effects. Rosie Knowles explores why carrying matters, and how to do it well! Find out more about babywearing safety, sling education and a guide to slings

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As those who know me will testify, the subject of infant reflux (or gastrointestinal oesophageal reflux GOR) is one that launches me on to my soapbox at a rate Dick Fosbury would have been impressed with. So I thought a blog piece might save me repeating myself quite so often...

Reflux has to be one of the most over diagnosed and yet least understood conditions of the 21st Century. Ask anyone above about forty and they look puzzled when you toss the term about - yet seemingly every other baby at a group now suffers from this rapidly spreading problem. It seems to have replaced "colic" at the doctors surgery - new mother, baby crying a lot, back arching; ah that will be reflux. Gaviscon prescription please! I would love to know just how much Gaviscon's profits have increased since this new trend.

On the flip side, infants with moderate to severe reflux (which can cause serious issues from aspiration to oesophageal damage) seem to really struggle to get anyone to take their problem seriously, beyond Gaviscon!

What is infant reflux?
As those listening at Chemistry class might remember, the term "reflux" (from medieval Latin reflūxus) means "flowing back". So, when you tell your doctor your baby is frequently being sick (sometimes copious amounts) and he tells you the baby has "reflux"; he is simply repeating back to you what you told him, using a more impressive sounding word.

If he adds "gastrointestinal oesophageal" he is telling you what is refluxing and where, ie contents from the stomach, into the oesophagus. If the amount of sick isn't sufficient to be termed reflux - it's considered normal "posetting". Generally reflux is forceful vomitting, whereas posetting is the effortless mouthful of milk infants can bring up after a feed (which can still look an impressive amount at the time, but isn't comparable to projectile).

If baby isn't vomiting, but is very unsettled for long periods (read as screaming!), arching their back and displaying unusual feeding behaviour such as fussing, refusing or feeding very frequently - this is termed "silent reflux".

At the most extreme end of the scale the condition is termed GORD (gastrointestinal oesophageal reflux disease or Pathogenic GOR). Babies with GORD suffer from excessive reflux which if not appropriately managed leads to complicationd such as; inadequate growth, failure to thrive, feeding aversions and oesophagitis, or atypical complications such as wheezing, pneumonia and chronic sinusitis. It is more common in children with neurological impairments or physical abnormalities, and it is estimated around 3 in 1000 infants display symptoms of GORD.

Those who reflux without weight gain issues or apparent distress are labelled "happy spitters" and these babies are generally not medicated.

The vast majority of typical infants will outgrow reflux by around their first birthday - even those who suffer severely when younger.

So what's my problem?
A reason that is often given for around 60% of infants suffering from reflux, is that they have a weaker lower oesophageal sphincter (the muscular ring at the lower end of the oesophagus), making them more prone to refluxing stomach contents - but given the number now diagnosed with this condition, why are babies suddenly suffering en-mass from abnormally weak stomachs? I don't doubt there are some with an unusually weak valve, or other physical condition, but I do believe these are the minority.

Infants suffering with moderate to severe reflux can be naturally very distressed, there can be risk of aspiration as discussed and it can be a worrying and exhausting time for parents. Isn't just handing out mediction without investigation unfair?

Why?
Because several things are known to cause reflux - yet instead of looking at possible reasons why a baby is refluxing, the doctor (with little breastfeeding training or experience and likely pushed for time), deals with trying to stop the symptoms via medication.

Causes

Tongue Tie/High Palate - This in my experience almost always causes either reflux, wind or both. If you had problems feeding previous infants, have experienced nipple pain during your feeding experience (even if this has now ceased) have a baby that is fussy/unsettled/hates being put down/hates the carseat/feeds for a long period or feeds very frequently - rule this out before you start cutting things you love from your diet! Removing dairy in my opinion can potentially cause a reduction in symptoms - even if it's not the cause )more about dairy further down)... The tongue co-ordinates sucking/swallowing and breathing meaning any variation can cause further problems. ( Brian Palmer also has also linked a restricted frenulum to acid reflux). Baby may present just as an oversupply baby, ie milk running out of sides of mouth, loud audible gulping, spluttering. Secondly baby needs to maintain a seal to form a vacuum when feeding, extremely difficult if you're tongue is restricted - causing increased intake of air again and difficulty obtaining fatty milk. I'm halfway through a blog entry specifically focusing on this!

Gut Flora - Candida (thrush), antibiotics and various other triggers such as food intolerances are linked with a less healthy gut flora. Probiotic supplement has been found by some sources to reduce colic/reflux symptoms.

Milk over supply/fast letdown - Reflux caused by a large supply or fast letdown is typically mild to moderate, and will in my experience usually manifest itself from around 3 weeks onwards, with 6 weeks being a prime time. Mums often comment baby gulps, coughs, gasps, splutters, clamps down, pulls from the breast or guzzles. Some find baby will feed until letdown - then pull off, arching and fussing or if it's severe refuse to latch at all. Other babies just appear to be fast feeders and don't seem to suffer until later. If mums have a large over supply, baby may display symptoms similar to that of a secondary lactose intolerance, as the infant struggles to produce enough lactase to digest all the lactose rich milk. See foremilk/hindmilk and a lot of confusion, for further information about this. If you think this may be the case, contact your local Lactation Consultant or registered Breastfeeding Counsellor who can discuss this further with you.

Latch/attachment problems - If baby is not well attached he is unable to milk the breast effectively. This may prevent him from effectively releasing the fat and result in more lactose rich milk (along with perhaps several other issues). Supply may decrease longterm with incorrect attachment, therefore if you think this may be the case contact your local Lactation Consultant or registered Breastfeeding Counsellor who can discuss this further with you.

Long feed spacings - Whereas in many countries, babies are fed little and often (the optimum way for a human infant) Western feed spacings are quite different. Typically larger volumes or milk are transferred less frequently, because this fits with what women expect (based on a non breastfeeding culture). Whilst some infants adjust to this pattern, others struggle with this unexpected strain on their gut. The reason this problem may be increasing is also due to mum's diet becoming more calorific, which in turn may lead to larger volumes of milk per sitting. Combine with a larger gap and letdown can easily become overpowering - hitting the stomach before refluxing straight back up!

In addition mums in the West are more like to do things we know contribute to the incidence of reflux; such as feed in positions which place baby laying down on their back fighting gravity, and then again in the cot, pram or moses basket after a feed. Compared to other cultures, Western infants spend a lot of time on their backs (hence the increasing rates of Plagiocephaly/Flat Head Syndrome, but that's one for another post!).

Residual Birth Trauma - Long births, C-Sections, extremely fast births, posterior pregnancies and labours can all impact. Baby takes immense forces through the sacrum and occipital area (back of head) during labour, which can compress the nerves linked with digestion. Furthermore if the diaphragm becomes distorted, it can compromise the ability of the gut to retain it's contents (ala reflux). Some mums note amazing results with Cranio-Sacral Osteopathy - Annalisa Barbieri wrote an article about birth and osteopathy when her daughter was diagnosed with reflux. A basic introduction well worth a read if the above describes your labour is this

Cow's Milk Protein Allergy - Unfortunately many paediatricians are still telling mothers if their baby doesn't have IgE mediated allergy (the typical hives, swelling etc) - it's not the cow's milk protein; absolutely not true. There are at least 30 antigenic primary proteins in milk, which can get through the digestive tract intact and cause reflux. These antigens can also be responsible for delayed immune responses, producing disease in any and all tissues.

Interestingly untreated allergy can lead to a litany of gastrointestinal, respiratory and/or dermatological problems; with increased rates of infection, particularly in the ears and sinuses. This can result in pain, recurrent illness, poor growth, delayed development and failure to thrive." Now read back up to the symptoms of GORD and compare the two - how many cases of allergy are misdiagnosed and mismanaged as severe reflux? Dairy can also hide in foods you would never expect, under various guises. Many infants allergic to dairy also display a similar reaction to Soy products. If you suspect milk protein may be an issue, look for information about "non IgE mediated allergy" and contact your location Lactation Consultant or Breastfeeding Counsellor and your Doctor.

Prematurity - Premature infants are more likely to reflux feeds than a term baby due to immature development and reduced muscle tone. Again our culture gives much larger feeds, more infrequently than experts suggest biologically normal.

Will stopping breastfeeding help?
No. Reflux is FAR more common in the non breastfed infant Those fed by bottle typically have longer feed spacings, increased volume and increased exposure to cow's milk protein. As discussed in this blog post, it's also a lot easier for bottle feeding mums to overfeed their baby causing reflux. For the majority of mothers, introducing bottles full-time, also results in formula usage. The impact of this on the health of the infant must therefore also be considered - the bacteria profiles of a breastfed and one receiving a breastmilk substitute are very different, some sources list overgrowth of bad bacteria as a reason in itself for reflux. If this is suspected, pro and prebiotic supplementation may help the non breastfed baby.

If allergy to cow's milk protein is suspected, eliminating from mum's diet (in all forms mentioned above) prevents baby receiving any!

Updated 2011

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Reflux - broken babies or profitable product?

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As those who know me will testify, the subject of infant reflux (or gastrointestinal oesophageal reflux GOR) is one that launches me on to my soapbox at a rate Dick Fosbury would have been impressed with. So I thought a blog piece might save me repeating myself quite so often...

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A good video on how to top and tail your baby

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For more useful info on Baby's health and wellbeing visit http://bit.ly/ebZslU We show you how to top and tail your newborn baby along with great advice and tips.

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NCT leaflet

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Information on using "real" nappies

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Info and support from Tommys

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From the NCT

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You won't need to bath your baby in the early days because you will probably be giving them a top and tail wash. But when you do start to bath your newborn baby, it can be a lovely experience although it may feel stressful at first. Some babies take to baths well and others don't seem to like them.

"Your little one may really enjoy their first bath. But don't worry if they don't like it straight away."

Most babies grow to enjoy bath time as they get more familiar with the experience.

You might find it helpful to watch this video from the NHS about how to bath your baby.

Safety tips for bath time

It's important to keep safety in mind at bath time. Babies and young children should never be left unattended in a bath, not even for a second (NHS, 2021). Here are some bath time tips:

Get everything ready ahead of your baby's bath, so you have everything you need to hand.

Make sure you always use the hot and cold taps at the same time when you run the bath.

Check the bath water temperature first before putting your baby in. The standard way to check is to put your elbow in the water because your hand can cope with high temperatures. The water should feel neither warmer or colder than your elbow.

Don't be distracted away by another child, a phone call or doorbell. What feels like a couple of seconds can turn into a minute or two. Leaving your little one even for a few moments could be enough time for them to seriously hurt themselves or drown.

If you forget anything - ask your partner or another family member to grab it for you. Or take your baby with you to get what you need. (NHS, 2021)

"Never leave your baby alone in the bath, not even for a second (NHS, 2021)."

When should I give my baby a bath?

There is no set age when you should give your baby a bath. Babies get cold quickly, and that's more risky for them than being a bit dirty.

If you're anxious about bathing your little one, you don't need to put them into a bath until you feel confident about it.

You may prefer to just wash your little one's face and bottom to begin with. This is sometimes called 'topping and tailing'.

If you're feeling confident about bathing your baby you can do so when you wish.

Choose a bath time when your little one is content and awake. It's better not to bathe your baby straight after a feed or when they're hungry or tired.

Some babies love bath time to begin with, others don't. You may need to try different ways of bathing your baby and at different times of day, to find out what suits you both. Choose a time of day when your baby is happy and awake (NHS, 2021).

How often can I give my baby a bath?

Your little one won't need a bath every day but if they enjoy it, there's no reason why you can't.

If you'd prefer to top and tail your newborn, you can do this every day or every few days or as needed.

Every baby is different - you will soon find out what works best for you and your little one.

How do I wash my baby?

If you want to top and tail your newborn, you can do this by washing them using cotton wool or a soft cloth and bowls of warm water. Warm tap water is probably fine but if you want to be particularly careful, use cooled boiled water to reduce the chance of infections in the first week or until your baby's cord drops off.

You can wash your newborn in a small baby bath.

If you'd prefer to share a bath with your little one, see below for more details.

It can help to have an extra pair of hands at bath time, if available, until you feel confident about bathing your baby on your own.

You don't need any special products to bathe your baby; only mild, non-perfumed soap can be used where needed. Plain water is best for your baby's skin during in the first month (NHS, 2021).

To find out more about caring for your newborn baby's umbilical cord, see our article on topping and tailing.

Can I take a bath with my baby?

Babies love to lie on a parent's chest in the bath.

Having a bath with your baby can help you both relax and encourage breastfeeding.

Remember, your baby might have a wee or poo while in the bath with you!

Baths are slippery, so it's not a good idea to get into or out of a bath carrying your baby. It's better to bath with your baby when there's someone else to hand them to you and take them from you. This could be your partner, your parent or a friend.

Tips for co-bathing

Get yourself settled and relaxed in the bath. Check the temperature is not too hot with your elbow.

Ask your partner, parent or friend to pass you your baby and lay them on your legs facing you.

Now you can lower as much of them into the water as you and they want by straightening your legs.

You might want to chat or sing to your baby to help soothe them.

Remember that your baby will get cold more quickly than you.

When you want to get out, make sure you pass your baby back to your helper before getting out yourself.

As your little one gets more used to bath time and you become more confident handling them, bathing with your baby becomes lots more fun.
This page was last reviewed in November 2021.
Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby and general enquiries for parents, members and volunteers: 0300 330 0700.

You might find attending one of our Early Days groups helpful as they give you the opportunity to explore different approaches to important parenting issues with a qualified group leader and other new parents in your area.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activities are happening nearby.

NHS Choices Birth to Five section.

Public Health England (PHE) provides guidelines about bathing children under two safely.

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Bathing your baby | Baby & toddler articles & support | NCT

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You won't need to bath your baby in the early days because you will probably be giving them a top and tail wash. But when you do start to bath your newborn baby, it can be a lovely experience although it may feel stressful at first.

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A great guide to diastasis recti, how to check for it and some yoga exercises to help recovery.

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Supporting love and nurture on the neonatal unit

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Supporting love and nurture on the neonatal unit

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Unicef leaflet

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One blogger's list of parenting tips

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Hindsight is both a wonderful and frustrating thing.

Especially when it comes to the parenting regrets we all tend to have.

I'm sure you can think of plenty of examples of things you believe you should have done, instead of what you actually did.

That is until you slap yourself, and truly realise you made the best decision you could have at the time, with what support and information you had available to you.

We don't always have the wisdom or resources available to us when we need it.

Parenting is mostly learned on the job and is supported by reading great books and observing others as we grew up.

My 6 Biggest Parenting Regrets

While I am now at peace with my journey, here are the 6 most significant things I would do differently, knowing what I do now.

I write this in the hope that others parents can ponder how they feel about those things themselves - and be proud of what they achieved.

Regret #1: Worrying About What Everyone Else Is Thinking

We all do it: we spend more time worrying about what other people are thinking about our choices and decisions. But in reality, if we knew how little other people thought about us, we'd kick ourselves.

With so many parenting styles, choices and options available to us as parents, not to mention the unique set of life circumstances we have, there will always be plenty of parents doing things differently to how you do it - and that's perfectly okay. You have to live with your choices every single day - not them. So do what makes you feel best as a mother or father. If your choices and decisions fill you up with love and joy, your whole family stands to benefit, along with your self esteem and confidence.

But if you're worrying about what other people are thinking, you're carrying around a backpack of concrete as the 'others' carry on thinking about what they're having for dinner that night, how they can get out of that expensive parking fine they got at lunch, and how they can patch up that tiff they had with their partner earlier that day - just for starters. There are so many distractions in life, constantly competing for our attention.

People will always have an opinion about what you do and say, but just like the last snazzy sports car you drove past, it may have caught your attention, but it was a fleeting, passing moment which has gone and likely been forgotten. What people think of your choices really is insignificant in the big scheme of things. If you're being judged or criticised, be sure to read my article here.

Regret #2: Not Trusting My Instincts

I am a huge believer that our bodies give us signals that we shouldn't ignore.

If you have a baby, you might have noticed that when your baby cries, your body responds. Your heart races. You feel anxious. You feel almost desperate to console your baby. Heck, you may even start to leak breastmilk. Your body is preparing you for comforting your baby, even before you do. Mother nature has us perfectly wired so our baby's cry will enable him to get his needs met, and our bodies will feel primed and determined to give him what he needs. Its pretty clever when you think about it.

So, where is the sense in believing that we should override this survival system in an attempt to have socially acceptable babies? Babies don't thrive when they are forced into schedules and timeframes based on a fully grown and developed adult. They are babies with a different set of needs and no wristwatch. If we could just let go of our societal programming to need schedules, deadlines, explanations and specific timeframes that our own, unique baby should be doing things, we'd be so much more relaxed.

Why does your alert system go off even when you're not responding to your baby's cries? Why does it make you cry and feel awful? Because you are fighting something that is not meant to be fought. Let go. This is what you were born to do mamma. Your brain might think otherwise, but your body will show you the way.

Regret #3: Going To Sleep School With My 4-5 Month Old

So, regret #1 and #2 led to regret #3.

I was a mess, and I decided the next step would be to go to a sleep school, just like other mothers in my shoes did.

If you're not familiar with what a sleep school is, they are usually overnight or several night stays at a hospital, in a ward run by nurses who help mothers resolve baby sleep issues. However, often a form of controlled crying is taught and cosleeping is not allowed or recommended.

This is probably one of the worst memories I have as a mother. I ended up at the sleep school for a week, when the program was designed for a three day stay. My daughter didn't want a bar of controlled crying (controlled comforting or whatever crappy label you want to put on it) and it was like even she became depressed, just like me.

It was customary for every mama to cry on the first night of sleep school, because they couldn't stand their babies crying. What a sad sight it was, seeing mamas standing at the door with the nurse, sobbing while their babies cried. Gosh, it makes me teary thinking about it now. How awful it feels as a mama, let alone the babies feeling frightened, alone and in the dark, wondering what the heck is going on and if someone is going to come and help them.

One night, I went into her room to check on her, and found her face covered in vomit. I was so sleep deprived and distressed with the whole ordeal that it triggered a panic attack. My daughter never drooled, let alone vomited. Yet she was covered all over her face and as well as down her body. By the end of the stay, she'd lost weight and the maternal health nurse pushed the formula envelope. Luckily she refused a bottle.

I wrote about my stay at the sleep school, after discovering a letter I wrote to my daughter while I was there. You can have a look here. It would have been awesome if someone had told me about the 4 month monsters phase, which every parent of a four month old tends to go through.

Regret #4: Not Being Kinder On Myself

Two things we fail to remember as mothers:

1. We're not Super Mama (and, no she doesn't exist).
2. We're not designed to raise babies on our own, while simultaneously keeping a display home.

There's no such thing as a perfect parent. But there are plenty of ways we can be a great one.

For the vast majority of mothers, we have indeed lost the village. We have no wise elders or communal/community living (how our ancestors learnt and gained confidence with parenting before they became parents themselves) and we often live far away from our family. Many of our partners are working longer hours than ever and there is so much more stress, strain and pressure on families - its ridiculous to think that you can do it all.

There are many ways to tackle this, depending on finances, resources and who you have around you. But if you have no family or friends around, you can hire a post-natal doula who is specially trained to help you at home after you've had a baby. You could hire a cleaner once a week or fortnight, and for less than $100, your house will be sparkling from top to toe. Call in for whatever reinforcements you can, but remember you will cope better with more sleep (discuss with your partner how you can achieve this), more support and a strong relationship with your partner.

Here is an article on 8 ways you can help prevent post-natal depression, which has lots of good tips on helping yourself feel better.

Regret #5: Getting Too Caught Up In Sleep Issues

Baby sleep is the bane of every mother and father's existence. It can be so easy to get caught up in the lack of sleep your baby is getting. Thankfully, all things are temporary. Its important to remember that babies need to wake often for their survival. Their tummies are tiny and empty quickly. They may wake up if they can't smell their mothers familiar smell or comforting touch. They just want to make sure they are safe.

You can read more about that in the hugely popular article, Why Does My Baby Wake Up When I Try To Put Him Down?.

As a result of getting stressed about how my baby should be sleeping, I ended up with all the issues above: #1, #2, #3 and #4.

If you haven't yet read it, check out my article on What A Cabinet Maker Taught Me About Babies And Sleep as well as the other great articles in our baby sleep section.

Also, follow along in our Baby Week By Week series, which supports you every week with ideas and advice from BellyBelly's amazing parenting editor. I truly wish this was available to me back then!

Regret #6: Underestimating The Importance Of Finding A Supportive Group Of Mamas

As I sit in a quiet cafe writing this article, a group of three mothers with adorable little babies are sitting together enjoying their lunch. Because there aren't many people in the cafe, it's easy to overhear them speaking, being incredibly kind and supportive of one another, as their babies take turns at having a grizzle.

As much as I love to see this beautiful sisterhood, I can't help but feel my heart sink a little.

When I had my firstborn over 14 years ago now, my ex-husband and I had just bought our first home in a new area. However, I didn't hit it off very well with my mothers group. Most of them were fixated on getting back to work, into the gym, baking and gardening - and since I had the ultimate velcro baby, all I cared about was getting a shower without a screaming baby some day.

My baby responded well to baby-led breastfeeding, co-sleeping and babywearing, which I felt was frowned upon and never discussed at mothers group - and even in society in general. When I explained that I hadn't been joining the group for few weeks in a row because I had been getting help with PND, they looked at me as if I had a third eye. I think that was the straw that broke the camel's back, and what led me to creating BellyBelly. I wanted to support mothers and talk openly about the realities, with gentle solutions.

Having PND was no surprise. Not only was I getting hardly any sleep and absolutely no 'me time', but I didn't have many friends or family around me. I felt alone, lost, confused and just wanting to be around women who understood and supported me. I just didn't know where to find them.

Thankfully, the online world offers mothers SO many opportunities to get involved with communities both online and in real life. If you don't get along with your mothers group (not everyone does!) then think about where you can find women who appeal to your interests and passions. For example, the Australian Breastfeeding Association offers regular support groups as well as drop-in sessions. There are more than 230 local Australian Breastfeeding Association (ABA) groups throughout Australia, which have the aim of helping other mothers through 'mother-to-mother' support.

Birth education classes sometimes offer post class catch-ups, especially if they are independent (private) birth education classes.

As a doula, and I have found so much love, wisdom and support from the doula community when I reach out for it. Think about what you're passionate about and get involved and connected

That is something that you wont regret.

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My 6 Biggest New Mother Regrets - And What I'd Do Differently | BellyBelly

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Hindsight is both a wonderful and frustrating thing. Especially when it comes to the parenting regrets we all tend to have. I'm sure you can think of plenty of examples of things you believe you should have done, instead of what you actually did.

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Advice from the NHS on washing your baby

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A step-by-step guide to washing and bathing your new baby, including how often to do it and how to 'top and tail'.

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Information about using child car seats safely.

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When a child sits in their car seat, the only thing holding them in place is the seat's five-point harness, so it is vital that that harness is correctly fitted and adjusted.

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Information about why and how you baby might be cared for if they need to stay in hospital after the birth

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What is the neonatal unit?

The neonatal unit provides expert 24/7 hospital care for premature or sick babies.

One baby in nine born in England will spend time on the neonatal unit (Bliss 2015), so it's something that happens to many families.

There are three types of neonatal unit, to suit the needs of different babies:

Neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), for the smallest or most seriously ill babies.

High-dependency care, for babies who do not need to be in the NICU but who still require complex care.

Special care, for babies who were born closer to their due date or who have a less serious illness. If your baby was born very early but is now growing well, or if he is getting better after a serious illness, he may be transferred to special care (BAPM 2011, Bliss 2015).

Why is my baby being moved to another hospital?

If your local hospital does not have the level of neonatal care your baby needs, he may have to stay in a different hospital until he is stronger. Sometimes, babies are transferred because all the cots are full in the local neonatal unit, or because there is a shortage of staff (Bliss 2015).

This is a really difficult situation for parents. If your baby is far away from home and you are struggling to spend time with him, ask your baby's nurse what help is available from the hospital or local charities. The hospital's Patient Advice and Liaison Services (PALS) can give you information.

You can also contact the special care baby charity, Bliss, for advice and support.

Can I stay with my baby in the neonatal unit?

Most neonatal units are open 24 hours a day for parents to visit. Others have more restricted visiting hours.

Your baby's siblings, and other relatives and friends, may also be allowed to visit. Ask one of the nurses about the policy for your baby's unit.

Many hospitals have a place for parents to stay overnight, but, unfortunately, some do not (Bliss 2015).

If you're away from the hospital you can call the neonatal unit any time, day or night. Ask as many questions as you want to, and don't hesitate to talk about any worries or concerns you may have about your baby.

Why does my baby need to be in the neonatal unit?

Premature babies need extra help while their bodies catch up on the growth and development they missed in the womb (uterus). The neonatal unit provides this in several ways.

It's harder for your premature baby to stay warm because he can't regulate his own body temperature yet. A special cot (incubator) can help with this (GOSH 2014, Knobel-Dail 2014).

Some babies who are born early need help with breathing for a while, until their lung development catches up. Babies who are weak or very ill may also need help with breathing (Bliss nd a).

If your baby is too small, too premature or too weak to feed, he might receive fluids and a nutrition mixture through a drip. Or he may need a tube that carries milk into his stomach (Tommy's 2014).

Premature babies also need extra monitoring, treatment and care because they can be more vulnerable to infection and other medical problems. You can read more about these in our article on early challenges for your premature baby.

About half of babies in the neonatal unit were not born prematurely, but need treatment or care because they are ill (Bliss 2015).

Having surgery, getting treatment for an infection or having light therapy for jaundice are some of the reasons that a baby may be in the neonatal unit.

Who will care for my baby in the unit?

On the neonatal unit, a skilled team of people from different professions will care for your baby. Some of the people you may meet include:

Staff and specialist neonatal nurses.

The senior nurse in charge of the unit (unit or ward manager).

Consultant paediatrician or neonatologist, the senior doctor who leads your baby's care.

Specialty paediatricians (also known as staff grade doctors or associate specialists). They are experienced doctors, but not consultants (RCPCH 2016).

Junior doctors in training. Despite the title, some junior doctors are actually very experienced, because their training takes many years.

Other specialist doctors, such as surgeons.

Physiotherapists to help with your baby's development.

Radiographers, who take X-rays and scans.

Dietitians who advise on nutrition.

Pharmacists.

A social worker to help you with family issues, financial worries, and support after you take your baby home (Bliss nd b).

Last but not least, there's you, the parents. You know your baby best and are always his most important carers. The professionals will recognise this and treat you as part of the team. They should encourage you to take an active part in your baby's care, as far as possible (Bliss 2011, NHS England 2015, Scottish Government 2013).

This means everything from changing nappies, feeding and cuddling your baby, through to agreeing your baby's medical treatment plan with his consultant.

What are all those machines and tubes for?

It's scary to see your baby attached to all sorts of tubes and machines. But it's all there to keep him safe. As your baby gets stronger, he will need less of this technology and it will be easier for you to hold him and care for him. Here is some of the equipment you could see in a neonatal unit:

Baby warmers

An incubator is a special cot with a lid that keeps your baby warm and sometimes controls the moisture level (humidity) around him. There may also be an overhead heater to keep your baby at the right temperature (GOSH 2014, Knobel-Dail 2014).

Monitors

Some of the machines you see attached to your baby are monitors that track his condition from minute to minute, and show the results on a screen.

These monitors may be keeping a check on his:

Heart rate

Blood pressure

Breathing

Oxygen levels

Temperature

(Cambridge University Hospitals)
These monitors have alarms, which may go off a lot. The monitor alarms are highly sensitive, and closely track every little change in your baby's body. An alarm going off can give you a scare if you don't know what it means. If you're ever worried or unsure about the monitors, don't hesitate to ask your baby's nurse.
Help with breathing

A ventilator can help your baby's lungs do the work of breathing. The doctor will gently insert a soft tube into your baby's windpipe. Through the tube, the ventilator pushes a mixture of air and oxygen in and out of your baby's lungs (Tommy's 2014).

A CPAP machine (continuous positive airway pressure) is another piece of equipment to help your baby breathe. It gently inflates your baby's lungs and keeps them open. Air goes in through a mask or a tube in your baby's nose (a nasal cannula) (Tommy's 2014).

If your baby just needs extra oxygen, he can have it through a mask, or via prongs that fit straight into his nose. Alternatively, the oxygen he needs may be fed directly into his incubator.

Tubes

Your baby may need to get fluids, medicines or nutrition through a tube into his vein. This vein is inserted with a thin needle. Sometimes the tube is called a venous cannula (the word cannula generally means a thin tube).

This tube may be attached to an infusion pump. It's a machine that makes sure your baby receives the right amount into his vein, at the right speed.

Your baby's doctor may also insert a tube in one of his arteries to test his blood pressure, oxygen and carbon dioxide levels. This may sound worrying, but babies only rarely need this treatment. Doctors obtain samples using this method because it works well and doesn't distress the babies under their care.

A feeding (gastric) tube gives your baby milk straight into his tummy, if he is not able to feed from the breast or bottle. The nurse will gently insert a soft, flexible tube through your baby's mouth or nose and down into his stomach.

Special lights

If your baby has jaundice, he may have treatment with a phototherapy light. Jaundice is common in newborns and it turns the skin yellow. It happens when a substance called bilirubin builds up faster than the baby's body can get rid of it.

Phototherapy helps your baby break down the bilirubin, until he can do it on his own. Your baby may be placed under a phototherapy light that shines above him, or on a blanket that shines the light on his back (NHS 2015).

How can I help my baby while he is in the unit?

All babies need their parents. Your touch, your voice and your presence all help your baby a great deal. The nurses should also encourage you to take care of your baby as much as possible, and help you do this safely and confidently. To find out more about taking care of your baby while he's in hospital, read our articles about:

When can my baby come home?

It's hard to say, because all babies are different. It depends on how your baby's doing. Babies who are smaller and those born sooner tend to stay longer on the unit.

A premature baby who is otherwise well usually stays in the neonatal unit until around the date he was due to be born (Jeffries 2014). If your baby is doing really well, he may even be able to come home sooner than this.

When your baby is almost ready to go home, you may be able to take over his care while he's still in hospital. This is called transitional care, and is a kind of stepping stone between hospital and home. You stay overnight with your baby, with nurses or midwives nearby for help and advice if you need it (BAPM 2011).

Transitional care is not available everywhere but if you do have access to it, it can really build your confidence when you bring your baby home.

Last reviewed: November 2016

Next review: November 2019

References

BAPM. 2011. Categories of care 2011. British Association of Perinatal Medicine. www.bapm.org [Accessed September 2016]

Bliss. 2011. The Bliss baby charter standards. www.bliss.org.uk [Accessed: September 2016]

Bliss. 2015. Hanging in the balance. Bliss baby report 2015. www.bliss.org.uk [Accessed September 2016]

Bliss. nd a. Ventilation. About neonatal care. www.bliss.org.uk [Accessed September 2016]

Bliss. nd b. Who's who on the neonatal unit. www.bliss.org.uk [Accessed September 2016]

Cambridge University Hospitals. nd. Routine monitoring of your baby. www.cuh.org.uk [Accessed September 2016]

GOSH. 2014. Thermoregulation for neonates. Great Ormond Street Hospital. www.gosh.nhs.uk [Accessed September 2016]

Jeffries AL. 2014. Going home: Facilitating discharge of the preterm infant. Canadian Paediatric Society position statement. Paediatr Child Health 19(1):31-36 www.cps.ca [Accessed September 2016]

Knobel-Dail R. 2014. Role of effective thermoregulation in premature neonates. Research and Reports in Neonatology 4:147-156

NHS. 2015. Treating jaundice in newborn babies. Health A-Z. NHS Choices. www.nhs.uk [Accessed September 2016]

RCPCH. 2016. Career information for Staff, Associate Specialist and Specialty (SAS) doctors. Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health. www.rcpch.ac.uk [Accessed September 2016]

Tommy's. 2014. Feeding your premature baby. Pregnancy information from our midwives. www.tommys.org [Accessed September 2016]

Tommy's. 2014. Breathing support for premature babies. Pregnancy information from our midwives. www.tommys.org [Accessed September 2016]

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The neonatal unit provides expert 24/7 hospital care for premature or sick babies. One baby in nine born in England will spend time on the neonatal unit (Bliss 2015), so it's something that happens to many families.

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Some babies are very unsettled in the evenings. This is normal, just feed feed feed!

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NCT leaftet

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Leaflet from Dogs' Trust

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Help and advice on dog training, behaviour, care and our Dog School from our experts.