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Get help explaining death to children. Explore our free, bilingual resources for families, providers, and teachers on coping with grief and loss of loved ones.

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The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

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Ready to Remember: Jeremy's Journey of Hope and Healing Video

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Brings to life the story of Jeremy, a 10-year-old boy, following the tragic death of his father. This video walks you through Jeremy's story and describes his journey as he and his family get help and are able to enjoy happy memories together.

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The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

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Brings to life the story of Rosie, a young girl who is struggling after the death of her mother, as she expresses wishes to see her mom, feels reluctant about school, finds no pleasure in activities she formerly found enjoyable, wonders whether she could somehow have caused her mother's death, and even refuses her favorite meal that Daddy has made. This video walks you through Rosie's story and illustrates how a parent can provide solace and support to a child after the death of a loved one.

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Rosie Remembers Mommy: Forever in Her Heart Video

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Brings to life the story of Rosie, a young girl who is struggling after the death of her mother. This video walks you through Rosie's story and illustrates how a parent can provide solace and support to a child after the death of a loved one.

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About Us

The Coalition to Support Grieving Students is a unique collaboration of the leading professional organizations representing classroom teachers (including teachers, paraprofessionals, and other instructional staff), principals, assistant principals, superintendents, school board members, and central office staff, student support personnel (including school counselors, school nurses, school psychologists, school social workers, and other student support personnel), and other school professionals who have come together with a common conviction: grieving students need the support and care of the school community.

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Home Page - Coalition to Support Grieving Students

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The Coalition to Support Grieving Students is a unique collaboration of the leading professional organizations representing classroom teachers (including teachers, paraprofessionals, and other instructional staff), principals, assistant principals, superintendents, school board members, and central office staff, student support personnel (including school counselors, school nurses, school psychologists, school social workers, and other student support personnel), and other school professionals who have come together with a common conviction: grieving students need the support and care of the school community.

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The Dougy Center for Grieving Children & Families | Portland, OR

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At the Dougy Center, you'll find grief support, resources, and connection before and after a death. We provide the right place when nothing feels right.

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National Association of School Psychologists (NASP)

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School-based support and increased understanding are essential when a student experiences the death of a friend or loved one. While each student will be affected differently depending on his or her developmental level, cultural beliefs, personal characteristics, family situation, and previous experiences. There are some strategies that can be helpful in supporting bereaved students.

General Tips to Support Students of All Ages

Be understanding and tolerant of common grief reactions which include: decreased appetite, difficulty sleeping, a decreased ability to concentrate, increased sadness, and social withdrawal. Students sometimes also feel anger toward the deceased for leaving them.

Be simple and straightforward. Discuss death in developmentally appropriate terms for students.

Use words such as "death," "die," or "dying" in your conversations and avoid euphemisms such as "they went away," "they are sleeping," "departed," and "passed away." Such euphemisms are abstract and may be confusing, especially for younger children.

Let students know that death is not contagious. Although all human beings will die at some point, death is not something that can be "caught" and it is unusual for children to die.

Be brief and patient. Remember that you may have to answer the same question multiple times and repeat key information to ensure understanding.

Listen, acknowledge feelings, and be nonjudgmental.

Express your own feelings in an open, calm, and appropriate way that encourages students to share their feelings and grief.

Avoid making assumptions and imposing your own beliefs on students.

A variety of feelings are normal. Be sensitive to each student's experience, as there is no one right way to respond to a loss. Feelings and behaviors will vary across students and will change throughout the bereavement process.

Normalize expressed feelings by telling students such are common after a death. However, if their expressions include risk to self (e.g. suicidal thoughts) or others, refer immediately to the appropriate professionals.

Be sensitive to cultural differences of students and their families in expressing grief and honoring the dead.

Consider a student's intellectual abilities, behavior, and conceptual understanding of death. For children with developmental disabilities. Their limited communication skills do not mean they are unaffected by the death. Behaviors such as increased frustration and compulsivity, somatic complaints, relationship difficulties, and increased self-stimulatory behaviors may be expressions of grief.

Maintain a normal routine in your classroom and engage students in activities they previously enjoyed.

Provide the opportunity to talk and ask questions and use these questions to guide further discussion. Encourage students to share feelings, but in ways that are not disruptive to the class or hurtful to other students.

Keep in mind that some children may have a difficult time expressing their feelings or may not feel comfortable talking at school. Do not pressure these students to talk. Some may prefer writing, drawing, listening to music, or playing a game instead of talking about their feelings. Provide students with a variety of options for expressing grief.

Talk to the bereaved student's classmates about grief and emphasize the importance of being understanding and sensitive.

Help bereaved students find a peer support group. There will likely be other who have also experienced the death of a loved one.

Tips When the Whole School is Affected by a Teacher or Student Death

A letter and/or direct communication via email should be sent home to all parents on school letterhead informing them of the death. Information to include in the communication:

Facts about the death to dispel rumors

Discussion of the range of feelings and reactions that may occur throughout the grief process

Guidance about talking to their children about the death

Indicators of the need for mental health counseling

Direction on how to contact the school if they have questions or believe their child may benefit from counseling

Direction on how to obtain community resources

Share factual information with staff (through meetings and bulletins), students (through class announcements and meetings), and parents (through letters/email). Regularly provide them with relevant updates.

Provide teachers with guidelines on how to share information about the death with their students and establish referral procedures for students requiring additional support.

Pay close attention to students who have experienced recent deaths or key life changes, witnessed the death, or have emotional problems.

Tips for Specific Age Groups

Preschool

Avoid euphemisms as preschoolers have trouble understanding death and may believe the death is reversible.

Provide opportunities to express thoughts and feelings about death through play activities and drawing.

Answer questions using concrete descriptions and be prepared to repeatedly answer questions.

Possible reactions include:

Crying or screaming

Clinging to caregivers or other trusted adults

Fear of separation

Regressive behaviors such as wetting pants and thumb sucking

Decreased verbalization

Elementary School

These students may ask questions and seek to try to understand what happened. Be patient and refer them to adults that can answer their questions.

Students below the age of eight may engage in magical thinking and believe they could have prevented the death. Recognize these feelings and fears but do not validate them.

Students ages nine through twelve may feel less comfortable showing feelings and seeing expressions of grief in others. Make sure to provide these students with a variety of ways to express grief.

Possible reactions include:

Behavioral difficulties

Decreased concentration

Poor school performance

Depression

Irritability

Withdrawal

Somatic complaints (headaches & stomachaches)

Middle and High School

Do not force students to share their feelings with others, including their peers if they do not feel comfortable. Provide them with opportunities to share their feelings privately.

Students often seek support via social media. Be aware of what is being posted and shared. Encourage students to seek support for a friend in need.

Students in their mid-to-late teens tend to feel more comfortable expressing their feelings and grief similar to adults.

High school students may use physical contact to show their support and empathy (e.g., hugging or touching the arm)

Possible reactions include:

Poor school performance

Anxiety

Depression

High risk behaviors or substance use

Emotional numbing

Suicidal thoughts

References:

Black, S. (2005). Research: How teachers and counselors can reach out to bereaved students. When children grieve. American School Board Journal, 192, 28-30. Retrieved from http://www.asbj.com/

Brown, J. A., Jimerson, S. R., & Comerchero, V. A. (2014). Cognitive development considerations to support bereaved students: Practical applications for school psychologists. Contemporary School Psychology. Advance online publication. doi:10.1007/s40688-014-0018-6

Dogan-Ates, A. (2010). Developmental differences in children's and adolescents' post-disaster reactions. Issues in Mental Health Nursing, 31, 470-476. doi:10.3109/01612840903582528

© 2015, National Association of School Psychologists, 4340 East West Highway, Suite 402, Bethesda, MD 20814, 301-657-0270, www.nasponline.org

Please cite this document as:

NASP School Safety and Crisis Response Committee. (2015). Addressing grief: Tips for teachers and Administrators. Bethesda, MD: National Association of School Psychologists. Bethesda, MD: National Association of School Psychologists.

Contributors: Benjamin S. Fernandez MSEd, Victoria A. Comerchero NCSP, Jacqueline A. Brown NCSP, Catherine Woahn, NCSP

Note. Schools and community agencies may adapt this handout to local needs for educational and student support purposes as long as proper credit is given to NASP.

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Addressing Grief: Tips for Teachers and Administrators

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School-based support and increased understanding are essential when a student experiences the death of a friend or loved one.

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Grief Support and Counseling - Centrica Care Navigators

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Centrica Care Navigators offers free and open grief counseling to the community, led by licensed grief counselors. Find the support you need.

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Bereavement Services in Southwest Michigan

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When you’re going through a difficult time after experiencing loss, turn to the compassionate team at Bronson for physical, emotional or mental grief support.

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safeTALK

safeTALK is a half-day alertness training that prepares anyone 15 or older, regardless of prior experience or training, to become a suicide-alert helper.

Over the course of their training, safeTALK participants will learn to:

Notice and respond to situations where suicidal thoughts might be present

Recognize that invitations for help are often overlooked

Move beyond the common tendency to miss, dismiss, and avoid suicide

Apply the TALK steps: Tell, Ask, Listen, and KeepSafe

Know community resources and how to connect someone with thoughts of suicide to them for further help

Training features

Presentations and guidance from a LivingWorks registered trainer

Access to support from a local community resource person

Hands-on skills practice and development

ASIST

ASIST is a two-day face-to-face workshop featuring powerful audiovisuals, discussions, and simulations.

At a LivingWorks ASIST workshop, you'll learn how to prevent suicide by recognizing signs, providing a skilled intervention, and developing a safety plan to keep someone alive.

Two knowledgeable, supportive trainers will guide you through the course, ensuring your comfort and safety.

LivingWorks ASIST trainees make their communities safer from suicide by providing life-saving interventions. They're a vital resource that trainees in connector programs-such as LivingWorks safeTALK-can call to help others.

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Suicide Prevention & Crisis Support Kalamazoo crisis line available 24/7

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safeTALK safeTALK is a half-day alertness training that prepares anyone 15 or older, regardless of prior experience or training, to become a suicide-alert helper.

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Need Help Dealing with Grief? - GriefShare

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GriefShare is a grief recovery support group where you can find help and healing for the hurt of losing a loved one.

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The words of TCF's Founder, Simon Stephens, resonate with those who have come to The Compassionate Friends hoping to find a purpose in a life that suddenly seems so empty. Whether your family has had a child die (at any age, from any cause) or you are trying to help those who have gone through this life altering experience, The Compassionate Friends exists to provide friendship, understanding, and hope to those going through the natural grieving process.

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The Compassionate Friends Non-Profit Organization for Grief

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The Compassionate Friends non-profit organization exists to provide friendship, understanding, and hope to those going through the natural grieving process.

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As mental health professionals who have experienced significant losses ourselves, we know individual grief is unique and there is no "right" way to cope. Our goal is to create a community that provides hope, creative expression, support, and education to anyone wishing to understand the complicated experience of life after loss.

What's Your Grief wrote a book! Although grief is immensely complex, our philosophy has always been that the best way to cope is one step at a time. This is a book to help you do just that.

We post a new article to What's Your Grief about once a week. Subscribe to stay up to date on all our posts.

What's Your Grief does not receive funding or grants to help our operational costs. If you've ever benefited from this community and would like to help us continue our work, please consider donating. We're a program of Fusion Partnerships, Inc., a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization. You can make a one-time or monthly donation in support of What's Your Grief. You also may give in memory of a loved one.

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Whats your Grief - A Grief Website for the Rest of Us

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What's Your Grief is a grief website and online community for grieving people and grief support professionals. We honor all types of loss and grief.

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It's OK to not be OK.

If your life has exploded into a million little bits, you don't need platitudes. You don't need cheerleading. You don't need to be told this all happened for a reason.

Some things cannot be fixed. They can only be carried.

I'm grieving Someone I know is grieving

How do you help a grieving friend?
Watch this short animation to find out.

I'm Megan.

Welcome. I'm glad you're here. I'm sorry you have need of this place. I'd rather know you for an entirely different, completely wonderful reason. And here we are anyway.

Most of what passes for grief support is less than useful. I created Refuge in Grief to tell the truth about grief, with no sugar coating. I created it to give you support that actually sounds like you - something that speaks to your life, your mind, your heart.

I made this for you: grief support that doesn't suck.

It's OK That You're Not OK is a book for grieving people, those who love them, and all those seeking to love themselves-and each other-better.

"It's OK That You're Not OK is a permission slip to feel what you feel, do what you do, and say what you say when life finds you in a place of profound loss and the world seems hell-bent on telling you the right way to get back to being the person you'll never again be."

Jonathan Fields, author of How to Live a Good Life, founder of Good Life Project

Buy Now

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Refuge in Grief: Grief Support That Doesn't Suck - Megan Devine

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Some things cannot be fixed. They can only be carried. Explore grief support resources from psychotherapist and author Megan Devine.

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Your Bright Future Podcast with Mrs. J and Mr. LD Episode 1-3

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We are so excited to bring you our new podcast. We hope this will be a good way for our families to connect with school counselors and learn helpful ways to build resiliency and good decision making skills in our students. We are a team.

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Grief Out Loud Podcast | Listen & Subscribe | Dougy Center

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Produced by Dougy Center, we open up the often avoided conversation of grief. Hear personal stories, get tips, and gain insights from bereavement professionals.

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Our director, Dr. Alan Wolfelt, has been recognized as one of North America's leading death educators, authors and grief counselors. His compassionate messages about healing in grief-based on his own personal losses as well has his professional experience supporting children, teens, adults, and families over the last three decades-speak not only to the intellect but to the hearts of all who hear him. Perhaps best known for his model of " companioning " versus "treating" mourners, Dr. Wolfelt is committed to helping people mourn well so they can live well and love well.

Founder and Director of the Center for Loss and Life Transition, Dr. Wolfelt presents numerous educational workshops each year for hospices, hospitals, schools, universities, funeral homes, community groups, and a variety of other organizations. He also teaches the bereavement caregiver trainings described on this website in beautiful Fort Collins, Colorado.

Dr. Wolfelt is a popular media resource who regularly provides his expertise to many top-tier television shows, newspapers, and magazines. Check out our News page for some of the recent articles he has been featured in. A past recipient of the Association for Death Education and Counseling's Death Educator Award, Dr. Wolfelt is also a faculty member of the University of Colorado Medical School's Department of Family Medicine.

A prolific author, Dr. Wolfelt is a regular contributor to several journals. His books have sold more than a million copies worldwide and have been translated into many languages. We invite you to visit the Companion Bookstore to learn more about his helpful books, DVDs, audiobooks, and the popular "Helping Series" brochures. Dr. Wolfelt and his wife, Sue, a family physician, are parents to three children. They live in the foothills of the beautiful Rocky Mountains next door to the Center for Loss and Life Transition. Email Dr. Alan Wolfelt.

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About Dr. Alan Wolfelt - Center for Loss & Life Transition

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Our director, Dr. Alan Wolfelt, has been recognized as one of North America's leading death educators, authors and grief counselors. His compassionate messages about healing in grief-based on his own personal losses as well has his professional experience supporting children, teens, adults, and families over the last three decades-speak not only to the intellect but to the hearts of all who hear him.

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Miss Suzanne 🌿 Grief Counselor (@child_life_grief_notes) on Instagram

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Supporting children, teens, parents & professionals ❤
Therapeutic activities that promote expression & healing 🎨
Grief Talk 💭
Book Recommendations 📚

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Speaking Grief is a public media initiative aimed at creating a more grief-aware society by validating the experience of grievers and helping to guide those who wish to support them.

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Speaking Grief | Public Media Documentary and Awareness Initative

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Speaking Grief is a public media initiative aimed at creating a more grief-aware society by validating the experience of grievers and helping to guide those who wish to support them.

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An online workshop series on Wednesdays at NOON from November 17 to December 22

After the loss of a loved one, holidays can feel especially lonely and difficult to navigate. Suddenly, the traditions you cherish don't feel the same. Friends and family members may not understand your reactions, but others who are grieving can relate - and their support can help.

In this 6-week webinar series, clinical mental health counselor Zeinab Moussa continues to discuss the emotions experienced by those who are grieving and offers healthy ways to cope through the upcoming holidays. Like her previous grief-and-loss webinar series, each weekly workshop will focus on one aspect of the grieving process, and participants will engage in drawing, writing, mental exercises, and relaxation techniques to help them work through their grief.

Supplies needed: plain paper; markers or crayons; pencil or pen.

Register for as many sessions as you like. All are free of charge. Click here to register.

Wednesday, November 17: Denial

Wednesday, November 24: Anger

Wednesday, December 1: Depression

Wednesday, December 8: Anxiety

Wednesday, December 15: Acceptance

Wednesday, December 22: Closure

The Stay Well "Grief and Loss" workshops are led by clinical mental health counselor Zeinab Moussa, M.A., LLPC, who specializes in helping people work through personal issues in their lives. Her professional background includes providing behavioral and mental health services, special education, and art education.

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Coping with Grief and Loss Through the Holidays

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An online workshop series on Wednesdays at NOON from November 17 to December 22 After the loss of a loved one, holidays can feel especially lonely and difficult to navigate. Suddenly, the traditions you cherish don't feel the same. Friends and family members may not understand your reactions, but others who are grieving can relate - and their support can help.

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Welcome! You are invited to join a meeting: People who are Grieving . After registering, you will receive a confirmation email about joining the meeting.

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The COVID-19 pandemic has brought tremendous loss. It took lives, prevented contact with the dying, and interfered with traditional end-of-life ceremonies. In this online support group designed for Michiganders grieving loved ones who died during the pandemic, you'll have a safe place to talk about your sorrow.

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Get access to files anywhere through secure cloud storage and file backup for your photos, videos, files and more with Google Drive.

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Making an Invisible String Hanging Ornament

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Making an Invisible String Hanging Ornament