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Social madia can impact on young kids and teen whuch affect their brain.

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Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, Facebook, Twitter and other social media sites are godsends to kids and teens who want to get in touch and know what is going on with their friends or relatives. By just opening an app or a website, they can communicate with and learn about all the people who are important to them (at least those who are signed in to the same network).

But like many things that people are passionate about, there are detractors to social networking. When it comes to kids and teens, many studies argues that social media has bad effects on the kids' minds - and the damage could be long-term and irrevocable. On the other hand, defenders are quick to point out that kids on social networking are increasing their social interaction while wiring their brains to adapt to new technology.

BAD EFFECTS OF SOCIAL MEDIA ON TEENS AND KIDS

The one common bad effect of social media is addiction - the constant checking of Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, or other social media updates. Experts believe that knowing what's going on with friends and what they are thinking or feeling can be addicting. Researchers at UCLA's Brain Mapping Center has found that being appreciated in social media through "likes" was seen in brain scans to activate the reward centers of the brain. This reward circuitry is particularly sensitive during adolescence, and this may partly explain why teenagers are more into social media.

For kids and teens, knowing how many people like what they posted, how many followed (or unfollowed) them, and knowing what people say about them also leads to compulsive checking. This addiction to social media could disrupt other worthwhile activities like concentrating on schoolwork, reading or engaging in sports. The heaviest social media users admit to checking their social media feeds more than 100 times a day, sometimes even during school.

Bad effects of social networking to kids and teens, according to psychologists or suggested by scientific studies, are as follows:

A 2015 U.K. Office for National Statistics finds that children who spend more than 3 hours each school day on social media sites are more than twice as likely to suffer poor mental health. Their immersion in a virtual world may cause these children to experience delay in their emotional and social development. According to the report, social media are potentially "a source of social comparison, cyber bullying and isolation", which could lead to mental health problems.

A report published by IZA Institute of Labor Economics even suggests that just one hour a day on social media can make a teen miserable. The study also theorized that this may be caused by issues of cyberbullying, an increase in social comparisons, and a decrease in real-life, face-to-face activities.

Another 2015 study by the British Psychological Society finds that teenagers being obligated to be responsive to social media (liking posts, answering texts and direct messages) throughout the day affect their mental health.

A University of Michigan study seem to indicate that in young adults, Facebook use leads to decline in subjective well-being. The more young adults use Facebook, the worse they feel moment-to-moment and the less they feel satisfied with their lives overall.

A 2021 Wall Street Journal article revealed that Facebook's own research shows that Instagram (which is owned by Facebook) is toxic for teen girls. In one in 3 teen girls, the social media makes their body image issues worse, and despite knowing that what they are seeing is bad for their mental health, they are unable to stop using it. Worse, 6% of suicidal American girls blames Instagram for wanting to kill themselves. (This, however, was disputed by Facebook.)

Teens, especially girls, are sensitive to social influence, and this peer sensitivity can lead them to obsessive thinking about body image, status, and popularity.

DoSometing.org, "one of the largest organizations for young people and social change", lists several bad effects of social media, which includes sleep disorder, depression, addiction, 24/7 stress, isolation, insecurity, and fear of missing out (FOMO).

FOMO or the fear of missing out on something important (like their friends' jokes, parties, activities and other ways of having fun) leads to depression and anxiety in teen social media users, according to a survey done by the Australian Psychological Society. FOMO is one of the main reasons for teenagers' heavy use of social media.

A 2019 study from the University of Montreal has found that among various types of screen time including playing video games, social media is more linked to depressive symptoms in teenagers. This is because in platforms popular to teens, especially Instagram, teens are likely to compare their lives to idealized images in their feed, and promote upward social comparison. Oftentimes, this makes them feel inadequate and bad about themselves.

Instagram, specifically may be bad for teen girls because it leads to more comparisons between them and others. These comparisons may not even be based on reality because Instagram images are subjected to filters, makeup, lighting, angles and other manipulations. Also, functional MRIs show that "likes" affect the reward circuit part of the brain, and associates the image with being better. Instagram is said to attract girls more than boys.

Screen relationships detract from spending time in real life relationships and developing social skills. According to Patricia Greenfield, professor of psychology in the UCLA College, the implications of her research is that when people use digital media for social interaction, they're spending less time developing social skills and learning to read nonverbal cues. "Social interaction is needed to develop skills in understanding the emotions of other people."

The results of a survey from the University of Glasgow shows that social media use particularly at night, with strong emotional involvement, led to poorer sleep quality, lower self-esteem, and higher levels of anxiety. This can be a problem since teens with low self-esteem grow up as depressed adults, according to previous studies.

Social media are fertile grounds for bad influencers and anonymous venoms and hunting grounds for deviants and other predators.

Social media also have a number of celebrity "influencers" who are actually paid to promote products, events, and services. Teens may have a hard time distinguishing between what is actually promotional advertising and fake information, and what is authentic.

For kids who crave attention, Facebook and other social media becomes a venue for them to act out. These kids may make inappropriate statements, pictures and videos that could ultimately harm them. Also, posts and materials that are published online tend to be permanent and may haunt them in the future.

Young people who have a history of harming themselves or attempting suicide might be particularly vulnerable to negative messages posted online, new research shows. The 2017 review, published in the journal PLOS ONE, found that kids and young adults who have thoughts of self-harm or suicide actually spend more time on the Internet and are more often victims of cyberbullying than their peers who do not have such thoughts.

A number of studies, including that from the San Diego State University suggests that more screen time and social media may have caused a rise in depression and suicide among American adolescents. The study also found that people who spend less time looking at screens and more time having face-to-face social interactions are less likely to be depressive or suicidal.

Some kids realize that spending a lot of time in social media results in wasted time, and this negatively affects their mood

Selfies, which became popular with the rise of camera phones, can trigger mental health conditions when a person becomes obsessed with looks. The Mirror, for example, recently featured a selfie addict who tried to kill himself when he couldn't take a perfect photo. According to Pamela Rutledge in Psychology Today, "Preoccupation with selfies can be a visible indicator of a young person with a lack of confidence or sense of self that might make him or her a victim of other problems as well. Excessive and increasingly provocative selfie-ing is a form of 'acting out,' a common behavioral pattern to get attention."

Educators also note that for kids and teens in social networks, there are no spelling and grammar rules. In fact it is cool to misspell and not make sense. Less sophisticated children will find it hard to differentiate between social networking communication and real world communication. In fact many teachers are complaining that social networking communication with misspellings and lack of grammar are seeping through student's school writings.

Social media habits are also blamed for lack of sleep and sleep problems in teenagers. Bright light emitted from smart phones and tablets are thought to disrupt sleep cycles. For young people sleep is important for learning, the development of the young brain, as well as for growing and staying healthy.

A study published in the medical journal JAMA suggests that the more teens check social media and stream video, the more likely they might develop symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder or ADHD, which causes shorter attention span, or distractibility.

Baroness Susan Greenfield , a top neuroscientist of the Oxford University warns about the lifelong effects of too much social networking. Facebook and other social media sites "are infantilizing the brain into the state of small children who are attracted by buzzing noises and bright lights, who have a short attention span and live for the moment". There is hardly any concentration skills required in participating in these social media sites, and these train the brain to have poor attention span.

Kids are detracted from learning to communicate in the real world. There are reports from teachers that social networking is affecting kids' comprehension levels. Also, if kids communicate primarily through the screen they do not learn the subtleties of real life communication - such as body language, tone of voice, and subconsciously sensing the molecules that other people release.

Social media sites make kids more self-centered. Since Instagram and other sites give kids their own page which is about them, it leads some vulnerable kids to think that everything revolves around them, a precursor for emotional problems in their later life. This might also result in inability to empathize.

These sites make kids prone to sensationalism.

A study by a team of economists at the University of Sheffield, shows that the more time children spend chatting on Facebook, Snapchat, WhatsApp and Instagram, the less happy they feel about their school work, the school they attend, their appearance, their family and their life overall. Children see their friends portraying themselves in idealized state when they post in social media. A vulnerable teen may suffer from depression when he reads great things happening to his friends, and his life is not so great in comparison. This effect was found to be worse for those who lack self-confidence. However, the study also found that teens in social media feel happier about their friendships.

Pediatricians observe that some teens suffer from "Facebook depression". After spending a lot of time on Facebook and other popular social networking sites, some teens become anxious and moody. Again, this seems to be caused by being exposed to friends whose idealized presentation of their lives appear to be superior to theirs. Teens who experience "Facebook depression" usually have trouble with social interactions in general, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).

Among social media, Instagram was found to be the worst for teens' mental health, according to a survey. Instagram, along with Snapchat, are said to be very image-focused and it appears they may be driving feelings of inadequacy and anxiety in young people.

GOOD EFFECTS OF SOCIAL MEDIA ON TEENS AND KIDS

On the other hand, other experts like the MacArthur Foundation see it differently. They claim that kids and teens are developing important technical and social skills online in ways that adults do not understand or value. It makes your child's life interesting as it expands his awareness about other people's thoughts and feelings. It connects him with personalities and influencers whom he can learn from:

Mizuko Ito of the University of California states that "spending time online is essential for young people to pick up the social and technical skills they need to be competent citizens in the digital age". Kids are learning basic social and technical skills to fully participate in modern society. Kids learn to adapt to permanent and public socializing and managing elaborate network of friends and acquaintances.

Social networking makes kids more peer-based. Young people are motivated to learn from their peers online. They interact and receive feedback from one another. They are motivated to learn more from each other than from adults. Teachers and adults are no longer the only sources of knowledge.

It makes kids more networked than ever. It is easier for kids to make friends with people all over the world, most of whom they will never ever meet without these technological advances.

Kids communicate and interact more than ever.

Social media makes it far easier to connect with long lost friends and relatives, as well as new-found friends. Also, because of the hectic pace of the modern age, it's harder to see people in person or reach via the phone. Social media is a great alternative way to always be connected.

Social networks actually make kids more relationship-oriented, considerate, and emphatic. Kids remember people's birthday and greet them. They comment on pictures, videos and status of their friends. They create longer term friendships by being in touch online even when friends are no longer physically meeting.

Some psychologists, in fact, are encouraging children with anxiety and depression to use Instagram and Snapchat to build relationships with peers,according to this article.

Kids and teens have a way to share with friends achievements they can be proud of, and perhaps inspire and motivate other kids.

Professor Larry Rosen notes that teens are developing the ability to show virtual empathy for distressed Facebook friends and that the empathy is actually well-received by friends, positively influencing their mood. This virtual empathy, he says, can even spill over into the real world, teaching teens how to empathize with others in everyday life.

Kids can exercise their creativity by using a social app like TikTok where they can create videos, usually by lip-synching or dancing along with popular songs. TikTok's editing features enable kids to create and edit professional-looking videos.

The British Medical Journal disagrees with Susan Greenfield's claim that prolonged computer use can trigger "autistic-like traits" and aggression, and that her claims are not backed by scientific data. Instead, social networking "has been found to enhance existing friendships and the quality of relationships, although some individuals benefit more than others."

Lastly, a 2019 study involving 12,000 UK adolescents suggests that there is just a tiny effect on teenage life satisfaction among those who use social media more than average.

HOW PARENTS CAN MAKE THE MOST OF KIDS USE OF SOCIAL MEDIA

Educate your child about the risks of social media and explain to him how it can be harmful as well as helpful. Teach your child about the danger of "oversharing", for example.

Encourage your child to spend more time - considerably more time - in actual communication than "social networking communication".

Tell your child to spend more time in real-life friendships and activities - Real face-to-face interaction is deeper and warmer than online friendships. Your child learn more social skills in relating to and having face-to-face communication with his friends. Online friendships does not teach your kid to listen to subtle vocal cues, interpret body language, and adapt to different personalities - skills that are often important to survive in the real world.

Encourage your child's other passion or interest - Instead of constantly telling your kid to stop going online, discover his other interests and nurture them. Examples of these are sports, playing a musical instrument, writing, crafts, etc. Schedule these real life activities for him, or support him when he is engaged on non-online activities that he is passionate about.

Suggest to your child to take advantage of social media to enhance learning, to collaborate with fellow students, not just for "hanging out" and spewing nonsense. Teach your child to differentiate between what has substance, and what is mere trash. You should also warn him not to engage in the darker side of social networking like cyberbullying, stalking, sharing inappropriate materials, etc.

If possible, supervise your child's online activity to protect him from online predators and other dangers - Do not be deceived that your child is online because of school research and studying. You should be constantly aware of what your child does online or what he does in front of the computer.

Help your child understand what is going on with her feed. Check with her who she is following, and how the account she is following Is making her feel. Be specifically concerned if these accounts are posting content that are influencing falsehoods, half-truths, unhealthy thoughts and behavior. On the other hand, approve and react positively when she is following people and accounts that has positive effects and motivate her to be better and have a growth mindset.

If your child feels anxious about how her friends seem to be living a better life than her, remind her that the images and postings of her friends are curated, and does not represent the whole story of her friends' life, and they are probably just sharing the best parts. Tell your child to spend less time scrolling her feed if it makes her unhappy

Join the social media that your child belongs to so you will have a sense of how they work and understand the impact they can have on your child. Also if possible, follow your child so you are aware of her activities online.

When you join your child's social network, just lurk or be a silent, watchful friend. You may like but avoid or refrain from commenting as this may turn her and her online friends off.

Emphasize to your child the difference between real-life and online relationships - Having 500 friends in Facebook, for example, does not necessarily mean that he is popular.

At an age when your child can easily fall prey to bad online influences, have the computer screen readily visible to you by putting the computer in a place where you regularly pass by. Do not position it on a hidden corner or angle.

If your child seems upset after looking at her phone or device, ask her about it. A CNN study shows that if parents are involved with their children's social media activities, their children are less likely to be upset with what happens to them online.

Emphasize to your child the difference between writing and spelling for social networking and real world writing.

As in everything, use social media in moderation. It cannot take the place of real-life relationships and other worthwhile pursuits like reading books and sports.

Limit the time that your child has access to her screens or social media. Ask her to leave her phone on a location visible to you at the time she does homework and when she is supposed to be sleeping at night.

Take advantage of apps that help you limit your child's social media time or trace his online activity. Look into your child's social media settings to see if there's a way to limit the social media's data collection about your child.

See also the list of best educational toys and gift ideas for children

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Good and Bad Effects of Social Media on Teens and Kids - Raise Smart Kid

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Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, Facebook, Twitter and other social media sites are godsends to kids and teens who want to get in touch and know what is going on with their friends or relatives. By just opening an app or a website, they can communicate with and learn about all the people who are important to them (at least those who are signed in to the same network).

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How Social Media Influences Attitudes & Behaviors - Video & Lesson Transcript | Study.com

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Social media influences the attitude and behaviors of users whether they are aware of it or not. Examine how social media has an impact on people’s…

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If we all were who we are on social media, there would be no authenticity and no one would truly know anyone. Overall, social media is going to be a part of our lives for many years to come.

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The average American teenager spends up to nine hours per day on social media. Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter and many more platforms allow people of all backgrounds to have a voice and connect in the virtual world. Especially as a member of the younger generation, I understand how social media can take control of our lives.

Growing up we have all heard the negative side effects of social media, but do we really understand how these small apps on our phones impact our brains? According to a UCLA study, the brain's reward center, the nucleus accumbens, lights up when people receive "likes" on social media. People strive for this acceptance, and this addiction of social media is now more prevalent than the addiction to cigarettes and alcohol.

According to Dr. John Richey, a Virginia Tech associate professor in the psychology department, "Humans are uniquely cooperative and social creatures, and we likely need to interact with others in order for our brains to develop optimally. Restricting interactions to a relatively artificial platform could potentially deprive a person of the richness of face-to-face social interaction, which includes many important nuances such as nonverbal cues displayed through the face and body."

Instagram alone has more than 700 million users worldwide. Instagram and Snapchat are the two worst social media platforms for those with mental health disorders. Body image, sleep patterns and a sense of "FOMO" (fear of missing out) are all impacted when we log into our profiles.

There is a sense of a "perfect life" on people's accounts. We all see the Snapchat stories of people laughing and having a great time. We all see the Instagram posts of beautiful people, happy, not a care in the world. However, these images do not show the rawness and true beauty of even the hard times of life.

This facade of "perfection" impacts the way we live our lives in reality. People who spend more than two hours per day on social media have a higher tendency to report a mental illness. Even without a mental health disorder, these platforms can make anyone feel negatively about themselves.

Now that you have the facts, what does all of this mean? How can we diminish these negative effects? How can we use social media for good?

First, we can decide to put our phones down more and focus on what is right in front of us. Yes, our virtual world has an abundance to offer, but it is not nearly as cool as who we are spending our time with and what we spend our days doing in reality.

Second, when we do use social media platforms, we can post positivity on our timelines rather than commenting or reading negativity. Follow people and organizations that are uplifting and inspiring. Post pictures and writings without filters that show people who you really are.

Lastly, remember that social media is not real. The images have been edited, the information has been altered and the people are only showing you what they want you to see. If we all were who we are on social media, there would be no authenticity and no one would truly know anyone.

Overall, social media is going to be a part of our lives for many years to come. These platforms will stay relevant, and we just have to make sure it becomes a positive aspect in the lives of those who use it.

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The average American teenager spends up to nine hours per day on social media. Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter and many more platforms allow people of all backgrounds to have a voice and connect in the virtual world. Especially as a member of the younger generation, I understand how social media can take control of our lives.

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How the Problem is going to be Solved (Solution )

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How the Problem is going to be Solved (Solution )

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How our group would solve the problem that having a notification asking you if you would want to post your comment and if the post is something hateful if you post anything hateful twice then there would be action to terminate the account that would impact one itself that is online which can cause violence on the post.

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The Problem statement is that social media can impact on one person's brain activity that would impact their life.

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So as social media perceived threats increase, the over-usage of the stress response also increases. It is not a coincidence that obesity, heart disease, and diabetes and cancer is on the rise.

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A human is an organism; the surroundings and conditions a person lives and operates in is his or her environment. Organisms can never be healthier than their environment, or more efficient than their suitability to that habitat.

Social media is the new tribal fire, but human biology hasn't changed in 50,000 years, unlike human technology.

Society is considerably more complex and diverse than it was 56-million years ago when our ancestors formed groups to increase survival odds, but the need to be social to survive remains the same.
Right Place, Wrong Brain
The Ventral Tegmental Area (VTA) of the brain monitors social needs by releases dopamine when we achieve social success and inspiring neurochemical deficits when we don't. Tragically, social media is not the VTA's friend.

Imagine an ape on social media. The VTA is in the old brain and equally ill-equipped to deal with social media.

The physiological cues that the VTA uses to determine social status from negative social media experiences are the same as those occurring in our ancestor's brains when the tribe banished them. Of course, not getting enough likes on Facebook is a lot different than being left to face jackals alone.

But the VTA cannot think; it only read signals and reacts. That's why people waste hours online arguing about things that have no control over. This response is not about the Facebook or Twitter war du jour. It is about the natural human fear of being cast out to face certain death. Although, no one has died from an offensive meme to my knowledge.

Cowards are brave on social media, which is why Internet Trolls exist, and do and say things that would never say in a face-to-face encounter. Additionally, we perceive such social media confrontations as a threat.

​

​ The perception of threat in the brain: The hippocampus (a memory area in the brain) continuously compares the external world to the brain's core belief of how the world should be.

That core belief is determined by a combination of genetics, epigenetics and the brain's structural and functional dynamics. This basic wiring is influenced by prenatal conditions and the perinatal brain's observation of its environment and subsequently tailoring its functionality to survive according to those observations. When there is a discrepancy between the external world and the brain's core belief, a threat occurs.

Threat causes the hippocampus to signal the amygdala, which activates the HPA (Hypothalamic Pituitary Adrenal) axis initiating the stress response.

Stress: The stress response begins with elevating blood pressure to move blood and oxygen to the large limbs in preparation for the eventuality of fight-or-flight. Then glucose is released into the bloodstream for quick energy, followed by other processes.The stress response is a good thing if preparing for fight-or-flight when one is reacting to actual threats because they are rare, and thereby do not over-tax the physiological mechanisms. However, when the stress response continuously activates due to perceived threats, the surges in blood pressure become hypertension and cardiovascular disease.

Chronically elevated blood glucose levels become insulin resistance, diabetes, obesity and various medical and psychological disorders that have been reliably associated with these conditions. Overactivating the stress response causes allostatic load - when your body's protective mechanisms start doing damage from being overused.

Allostatic load happens because the pathophysiology of stress begins in the old brain. By evolutionary design, structures in this part of the brain cannot think. Their mantra is "Survive now, ask questions later."

Thinking, and higher cognitive processes only occur in the new brain. To further complicate matters, primate biology constructed structural brain dynamics to suspend cortical functions, such as thinking, when key subcortical processes, such as the stress response swing into action. This old brain/new brain nexus exists because stopping to think about that rustle in the bush could be the difference between talking about it at dinner and being dinner.

#HoustonWeHaveAproblem: The old brain cannot think, and therefore cannot distinguish actual threats from perceived threats. Social media has excessive amounts of perceived threats, and the new brain can't come to the rescue because it is taken offline during the stress response

So as social media perceived threats increase, the over-usage of the stress response also increases. It is not a coincidence that obesity, heart disease, and diabetes and cancer is on the rise. All human brains continuously process information from the environment and initiate the stress response in the face of threat, whether fear (actual danger) or anxiety (perceived danger) causes it. Regardless of your station in life - chronic stress causes allostatic load. Allostatic load is the gateway to distorted perception and disease.

The hate-fires on social media are not lethal like real fires, but they need to be approached with caution because they promote diseases that are.

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Yes, humans are in trouble, and we need to fix it, but how? Well, society occurs whenever two or more humans interact, so start there - in traffic, in the break room at work, the supermarket line or on social media; leave your politics, religion, and judgment at home. Embrace empathy, and commit random acts of kindness. Time is the most precious human resource, so don't squander time holding on to resentments or judging others, attaching yourself to outcomes. And certainly, don't waste it on Twitter wars or Facebook feuds.

Ultimately fixing society is like saving money, if you take care of the pennies, the dollars will take care of themselves.

Remain fabulous and phenomenal!

drbillyg on Instagram

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Social Media Is Harmful to Your Brain and Relationships

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A human is an organism; the surroundings and conditions a person lives and operates in is his or her environment. Organisms can never be healthier than their environment, or more efficient than their suitability to that habitat. Social media is the new tribal fire, but human biology hasn't changed in 50,000 years, unlike human technology.

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Do the arguments we have matter that much 

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Do the arguments we have matter that much 

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Some say that what goes wrong in our political arguments is that the participants care mostly about winning the argument. It would be better if they cared more about learning and finding the truth, and less about winning.

Indeed, if you frequent the political side of social media, you will see people arguing ad nauseum with each other while giving onlookers little hope that any progress is being made because everybody is shouting loudly with their fingers in their ears.

But if wanting to win is the problem, then many experts in the psychology of reasoning are starting to paint a depressing picture. Their models of human reasoning tell us that we are all natural-born lawyers. We work hard to defend our positions and persuade others to hold them. And trying to fight this tendency is like riding one's bicycle into a strong headwind.

Where does that leave us? In good shape, actually. I will make the case that we don't actually need to ride our bicycles into that strong headwind, because wanting to win is not the main problem. Something else is.

Furthermore, counter-intuitive as it might seem, when the circumstances are favorable, wanting to win is one of our most efficient ways to get to the truth.
Human Reasoning is Biased and Lazy
We will start with a banal observation. Human reasoning is biased and lazy. Reflective individuals have known this for millennia, and Mercier and Sperber go to great lengths in their 2017 book to drive the message home.

"The tour starts with a pair of observations: human reason is both biased and lazy. Biased because it overwhelmingly finds justifications and arguments that support the reasoner's point of view, lazy because reason makes little effort to assess the quality of the justifications and arguments it produces." -- Mercier and Sperber (2017), The Enigma of Reason, p. 9.

Our reasoning is lazy. That's the bad news. The good news is that it is only selectively so. For the most part, our laziness is confined to the evaluation of our own reasons. When we evaluate other people's reasons, we are vigilant and sharp, especially if we disagree with them.

When we overgeneralize, we are unlikely to catch our own mistake. When the other person overgeneralizes, counterexamples jump readily to mind. When external factors might be clouding our own judgment, we are unlikely to see them. When they might be clouding our opponent's judgment, our causal imaginations are strong.

Why are we like this? Why are we so biased and asymmetrically lazy? And how can this possibly be a good thing?
Human Beings Are Limited
We will continue with another banal observation. Human beings are limited. We each are born into the world knowing next to nothing. And then we each take a particular path through the world. Along the way we have some experiences (but not others), are taught by some adults (but not others), read some books (but not others), have some conversations (but not others), develop some sense-making models and narratives (but not others), make some inferences (but not others), imagine some possibilities (but not others), and see everything from a limited perspective with our own unique blend of visceral needs at the center of it all.

Our parochial bubble is pierced here and there as we open our minds, learn new things, and argue with each other, but no one comes into a complex argument knowing all the relevant considerations, or with an ability to see things from every point of view.

On top of that, we all have roughly the same limited cognitive equipment. Our working memories are better than those of any meat-based computers in the entire world, but they are still quite limited and in predictable ways. We are less than thorough in assessing our own reasons, in part, because we are limited in our ability to imagine possibilities. As Philip Johnson-Laird notes:

"We think about possibilities when we reason. [...] And that's why our erroneous conclusions tend to be compatible with just some possibilities: we overlook the others." Johnson-Laird (2008), How We Reason.

But we don't overlook possibilities merely because we have a perverse desire to win an argument, and we are trying to hoodwink our partner.

Part of the problem is that, compared to the pooled experience of the entire community, our experience is partial. We know what we know and don't know what we don't know. Part of the problem is that our working memories are limited, and the on-the-fly mental models we construct in order to think things through are only partial models that don't allow us to see some of the relevant possibilities. And part of the problem is that the positions we defend are generally fairly consistent with the rest of what we believe. If counterexamples were readily available to us, we wouldn't have held the position we are defending in the first place.

And all of that can put us in a poor position to evaluate our own reasons thoroughly, even if we want to. In fact, that might be partly why we are selectively lazy in our reasoning. We don't bother much with evaluating our own reasons, because, frankly, we're not the best person for the job.

A well-matched arguing partner is in a better position to evaluate our reasons than we are. And we are in a better position to evaluate their reasons than they are. We know things they don't. They know things we don't. We imagine possibilities they overlook. They imagine possibilities we overlook. Furthermore, they are motivated to notice possibilities we have missed, because, duh, they want to win.
Late Night Bull Sessions and Politics on Social Media
A desire to win makes us more vigilant in evaluating other people's reasons. But it also makes us willing to shoot our entire load in support of our own position.

This dynamic is easy to see in late night bull sessions where participants keep pushing their positions to an almost silly degree because they're not ready to give up yet.

The topic arises: Takeru Kobayashi vs Spock in a hot dog eating contest. I take Kobayashi (have you seen that guy eat hot dogs?). You take Spock. We go back and forth. You cite facts about Vulcan physiology. I show you YouTube clips of Kobayashi eating hot dogs. You seem to have the losing case, but you keep generating reasons anyway. I ask if you're ready to concede. Of course, you're not ready to concede. You haven't tried everything yet. Eventually, you say, "Spock would win because Scotty would beam the hot dogs out of his stomach as fast as he ate them." (And perhaps you generated this reason because you remembered Badger's premise in this scene of "Breaking Bad")

Your persistence didn't cure cancer or help us solve the climate crisis. Perhaps you didn't even win the argument. But our imaginations are now all richer because you persisted.

Wanting to win can be a good thing. It motivates us to be vigilant in evaluation where we have the most leverage (evaluating other people's reasons), and it motivates us to pool together a larger set of considerations.

And yet . . .

We all know that political arguments on social media aren't always so productive. And we know that people who argue on social media want to win something fierce. So it's hard to shake the suspicion that wanting to win has a downside.

So what is the difference between the late-night bull session, where wanting to win is paired with progress, and the typical political argument on social media, where wanting to win is paired with pain?
Fear Is the Mind-Killer
Eliezer Yudkowsky had it right when he said: "Politics is the mind killer." But that's because Frank Herbert had it right when he said that "Fear is the mind killer." Politics is the mind-killer, in large part, because fear is the mind-killer.

In late-night arguments with friends over who will win a hot dog eating contest, the participants have little to lose. The safety of the friendships, and the plausible deniability provided by whatever substances they've consumed, allow them to "play the fool" in defense of their own position. And they can concede points without losing face.

But sober political arguments are different. Politics can cause many fears to surface. One side fears their own children will be gunned down in their school. The other side fears their guns will be confiscated. One side fears the nation is headed toward a Communist dystopia. The other fears it is headed toward a different dystopia, where the poor are perpetually exploited by the rich.

And these fears are often overshadowed by an even greater fear -- the fear of losing face. People fear that, if they lose the argument, their group might lose face in the larger community. And they fear that, if they concede too much, they will lose face in their groups.

All this fear hijacks our minds and undermines our commitment to fair play. When the stakes get high, people no longer allow their blind spots to be corrected. They refuse to acknowledge the force of counterexamples. They no longer moderate their positions. They dodge and weave and change the subject when the argument isn't going their way. They obfuscate. They set rhetorical traps. They stop listening. They semi-deliberately misinterpret their opponent. And sometimes they stop arguing with their opponent altogether and use them as a platform for preaching to their own choir.

High stakes plus anonymity plus in-group/out-group dynamics does strange things to interlocutors. It can make them impatient, evasive, and mean.
How to Have More Productive Political Arguments
We should try to win our political arguments. In fact, we have a duty to try to win, because, if we don't, we will likely shortchange the community of all the good reasons we have locked up in our heads. And we should also celebrate a well-matched opponent who is trying to win the other side of the argument. Reasonable, vigorous dialectic can pool possibilities and correct for blind spots at a dizzying pace.

But these the benefits will flow strongest when both sides try to win fairly. And fair play goes out the window when fear reigns supreme.

And with that in mind, I offer these four rules of thumb for participating in political arguments on social media.

1. Manage your own fear. We all have blind spots. Try to make it safe for yourself to acknowledge possibilities you hadn't considered. We all overgeneralize (in fact, I might be doing it right now). So there is a real possibility that you will say something at some point in an argument that requires some backpedaling. Try to make it safe for yourself to backpedal when you need to. We all have soft spots. Try to keep your pulse on how hot you are in the moment. Maybe it's best to come back to the argument when your amygdala has loosened its grip a bit. If you find you are not listening well, or you are obfuscating, or you are trying to change the subject, ask yourself "What am I afraid of?".

2. Manage your opponent's fear. Make sure they know they can save face if they need to concede a point or backpedal a bit. ("I can see why you say that, but have you considered this...?") If their amygdala has the best of them, suggest picking up the argument at a later time. If your opponent isn't listening, or starts obfuscating, or starts changing the subject, ask yourself "what are they afraid of?" Maybe a reassurance or two can get the argument back on track.

3. Review common ground. As we saw in part 2 of this series, reasonable arguments are brilliant vehicles for refining our differences and expanding common ground. And common ground is often a partial antidote to fear.

4. Avoid nicknamers. (Did I just give them a nickname?) Arguing with people who call everyone they disagree with "libtard" or "Nazi" is often fruitless. These folks are giving loud and clear signals that they are unreasonable. They have left themselves no way to retreat without losing face. Their bridges are burned, and they will do anything necessary to avoid defeat. (On the other hand, if you are itching for a cathartic fight that accomplishes little, then, by all means, dive in).

Finally, please overlook my hypocrisy here. Anyone who has argued with me about politics knows that I sometimes follow these rules of thumb, and sometimes I get carried away in the heat of the moment. Like everyone, I'm a work in progress.

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Should We Stop Trying to Win Arguments on Social Media?

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Some say that what goes wrong in our political arguments is that the participants care mostly about winning the argument. It would be better if they cared more about learning and finding the truth, and less about winning.

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Social Media Apps and Sites Commonly Used by Children and Teens

Digital media and apps allow children to communicate and express their creativity, connect with peers, and share their feelings. However, they can be an avenue through which cyberbullying occurs. There are many types of apps and sites available for free that give users the ability to search for people and share or post information about them anonymously.

Parents may not be aware of the apps that their children use regularly or may not be aware of the risks involved in using them. There are many ways that cyberbullying can be hidden in apps and sites, such as texts, videos, and web calls that disappear or do not appear on the device's call or text message logs.

Many apps also make it easy for users to access, view or participate in adult or harmful content. Privacy and location settings may make them more vulnerable to stalking, cyberbullying, exposure to adult content, or other dangers.

Some current popular social media venues and apps include:

Askfm: A social networking site that allows users to ask other people questions, often anonymously.

Calculator%: A "vault" or secret app that appears harmless, but hides photos, videos, files, and browser history.

Chatroulette: There are over 20 different chat roulette sites that allow users to instantly connect via webcam and video chat. Sites typically pair the users randomly and instantly.

Discord: A voice-over-IP (VOIP) app that allows users to video chat with others, private message, and join, create, or participate in public and private chat rooms. This app is often used by players to chat with each other while playing videogames.

Facebook and Facebook Live: The most commonly used social media site that is accessible on many different media platforms.

Instagram: A photo and video sharing and networking site that connects users through other social networking sites (e.g., Facebook).

Kik: Messaging app that allows users of all ages to contact others anonymously.

Line: A messaging app that allows users to make free phone calls, leave voice messages, and text. Users can delete texts or chats from recipient's phone using a timer.

LiveMe: A tool to broadcast live-streaming videos and watch other users' videos.

MeetMe: A dating app that connects users to others based on geographic proximity.

Omegle: An app that pairs users with strangers in anonymous one-on-one chat sessions.

Reddit: A site that stores social news, rates and evaluates web content, and discussion threads.

Sarahah: An anonymous messaging app that allows users to send anonymous messages to people they may know.

Snapchat: A photo messaging app that allows for sharing pictures and short videos that are intended to be erased shortly after delivery.

Telegram: Messaging app that allows users to share photos, videos, and files; make calls, and delete texts or chats from recipient's phone using a timer.

TikTok: An app that allows users to create and share their own videos where they lip-synch, sing, dance, or just talk.

Tumblr: A social networking site that allows posting of short blogs and media.

Twitter: A microblogging site that allows users to send, read, and reply to "tweets" or short messages.

Vine: An app that allows the posting of short 6-second looping videos.

WeChat: An app that allows user to chat with friends, and to search for people nearby and around the globe.

WhatsApp: A private messaging app that allows users to text, send photos, videos, and location information to their contacts.

Whisper: An anonymous social media site that allows users to post and share photo and video messages.

YouTube: A video sharing platform that allows users to post and share videos.

YUBO (formerly YELLOW): An app referred to as the "Tinder for teens" that allows users to swipe right or left to accept or reject the profiles of other users.

Social media has many benefits that must be balanced with the risks it presents. Risks to be aware of include:

Screening for harmful content on websites and apps varies widely.

Content posted can be incorrect, harmful, or hurtful (e.g., why are you so dumb?).

Can be used to share harmful or adult content.

Privacy controls over who can view or access posted material vary across apps, and many users are not aware of how to use them effectively.

Apps that allow for real-time user videos "live streaming" can been used to show bullying, violence, suicide, and harmful acts as they are happening.

Some apps that include location information can be used to get personal information, such as someone's age, current location, or where someone lives.

Apps that support telephone calls do not show up on a call log, so parents may not know who their children are talking to.

Cyberbullying and Online Gaming

Playing videogames is a popular activity, with 90 percent of teens gaming online. Many video games - whether they are on a computer, game console, cellphone or tablet - allow users to play with friends they know in person and others they have met only online. While gaming can have positive benefits like making new friends, socializing, and learning how to strategize and problem solve, it is also another place where cyberbullying occurs.

Anonymity of players and the use of avatars allow users to create alter-egos or fictional versions of themselves, which is part of the fun of gaming. But it also allows users to harass, bully, and sometimes gang up on other players, sending or posting negative or hurtful messages and using the game as a tool of harassment. If someone is not performing well, other children may curse or make negative remarks that turn into bullying, or they might exclude the person from playing together.

Because players are anonymous, they cannot necessarily be held accountable for their behavior, and their harassment can cause some players to leave games. Some anonymous users use the game as a means to harass strangers or to get their personal information, like user names and passwords.

There are things adults can do to prevent cyberbullying of children who are gaming:

Play the game or observe when the gaming happens to understand how it works and what a child is exposed to in the game.

Check in periodically with your child about who is online, playing the game with them.

Teach your children about safe online behavior, including not clicking on links from strangers, not sharing personal information, not participating in bullying behavior of other players, and what to do if they observe or experience bullying.

Establish rules about how much time a child can spend playing video games.

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Digital media and apps allow children to communicate and express their creativity, connect with peers, and share their feelings. However, they can be an avenue through which cyberbullying occurs. There are many types of apps and sites available for free that give users the ability to search for people and share or post information about them anonymously.

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Sometimes people argue over things that they both could be right about but don't understand