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Smart Goal; Forming my band to perform the songs

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Smart Goal; Forming my band to perform the songs

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Specific:

I want to form a complete band for Avazeboz and prepare for our first live performance. This includes finding committed musicians and instrumentalists who share my vision, rehearsing together, and arranging all aspects of our first gig and performance song for assignment.

Measurable:

Success means having a fully formed lineup, at least four songs ready to perform live, and organizing one performance by the end of the term.

Achievable:

This goal is realistic because I have prior experience as a bandleader in Iran’s underground metal scene. I’ve led a death metal band, arranged band activities, and taken part in both musical and theatrical performances. I’ve already composed all songs for the current EP and begun working with potential members.

Relevant:

Live performance is a key part of my artistic vision. Avazeboz is not just a studio project—it is a ritualistic, political, and theatrical black metal act. Performing live will help build a fanbase and express the core message of the band more powerfully than only releasing music. also I need to find some members that we can actually play the song for assignment.

Time-bound:

My deadline is the end of this academic term. By then, I aim to have the band formed, rehearsals running regularly, and at least one gig scheduled or performed.

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Smart Goal; record vocal part(by myself or finding someone)

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Smart Goal; record vocal part(by myself or finding someone)

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Specific:

I’m going to get ready and record all the vocal parts for this album, even by myself or finding someone. This goal is a tricky one because I try to get myself ready and learn the screaming techniques but alwayes I feel bad in my throught and I’m afraid if I damaged my voice so takes longer to relief then do the training. Othervise if I coudlt do that by myself I try to find someone.

Measurable:

The goal is completed when all vocal tracks for the album are recorded, and at least one song is performed by me for this term’s assignment.

Achievable:

It is tricky and I might have some challenge, cause the language on this project is Persian and if I want to find someone, it is a low chance to find Iranian metal fans and singer in South England and London, but I know some Iranian dudes in UK even in metal scence (not in South East and London) they might help me. I already have all the lyrics and vox melodies for all songs and just need to do find or do by myself.

Relevant:

As I choose my constructing songs for assignment on this term by two songs of EP, I need to perform one of them by end of the term. This goal is also important because vocals are one of the key parts of finishing the album.

Time-bound:

I need to perform at least one of the songs by end of the term, and record the rest of the vocals as soon as I can, either by myself or with someone.

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Smart Goal; Getting better on specific Black Metal guitar techniques

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Smart Goal; Getting better on specific Black Metal guitar techniques

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Specific:

Getting better on specific black metal guitar techniques. I feel this album I have made is kinda multi-genre black metal than authentic black metal. Also I need to learn shredding techniques as a lead guitarist.

Measurable:

How to measure: I need to cover a lot of BM songs. That helps me to learn more about all type of BM composition, increase my creativities and style.

Achievable:

It is achievable cause I play guitar for 8 years (not professionally).

Relevant:

I like to start the second EP strongly authentic black metal or more war metal/grind death and improve my guitar techniques.

Time-bound:

This goal is ongoing, but the progress should support the second EP writing process starting soon, and be active during this term.

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I have done all the EP tracks by myself. I know how to compose a metal song. The EP includes 4 songs, and that’s a concept album where all the songs are a chapter of the story. I played guitar and bass and programmed drums by my own, recorded, made tabs for my future bandmates or house band (I’m not optimistic about them because probably they are not metal musicians, even though my music is extreme metal!). These are all my abilities.

Unfortunately, I can’t sing due to my vocal cords damage. I used to do it, but I think I did it in the wrong way and didn’t care about the safety, so I had massive damage. Also, I need to improve my mixing and mastering skills as a solo artist.

Here is the whole 20-minute EP I have done by myself and recorded last term. I’m going to talk about each one separately in the following weeks and analyze it and set my goal.

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weeks 1 and 2 are just for planning. I’m gonna analyse the opportunities, write my smart goals and do the sowat analysis. this is just to see what i really can do in this term and how realistic it is.

weeks 3 4 and 5 i will focus more on vocal training, guitar practice and weekly rehearsal. also in these weeks i will analyse the audio song and write about it.

weeks 6 7 8 i’m going to get the band ready for performing, try to make them tight. also i will still do weekly warm up and vocal training or if i can’t do it myself i’ll look for a vocalist. i will also talk about the process of the audio song while keeping rehearsal.

weeks 9 and 10 are for final preparation. by then i should have at least one strong song ready to perform for the assignment.

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as I already recorded the audio song by myself, I already passed half the way, but it isn’t completed because I still haven’t recorded the vocal part and it would be a little bit challenging for me. about the vocal, all the lyrics are ready and have written on the melody of the song and I need to sing it. but singing in black metal style of screaming which is known as cult screaming is hard for me. I have done it before, also I recorded very well but after that I feel I damaged my vocal cords, cause every time my throat is wet and dehydrated. maybe I just need some training to heal my voice and unlock my false cord. before that I didn’t know about that and really unprofessional I screamed and recorded songs by my vocal cords from the throat. that damaged my voice and after that I have found difficulties to scream. about my performing song, I need to form a band and find some real members. at the moment I play with my drummer and our rehearsals are good. thankfully he can play the first song which is my performing song. but I need a lead or rhythm guitarist and a bassist as well. this would be my focus to find new musicians and set many rehearsals and getting ready for performance. also during these I would focus on my guitar practicing, vocal training, and performing skills.

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I want to analyse the third song intro in this. as you see on the screen recording, intro started with an arpeggios rhythm, and then drums and distorted guitar and bass are added to the song, it’s a slow vibe intro and we have drums on the melody of distortion guitar and bass. as I shown each track solo and together, you can see the section written on drums and bass.I recorded all my guitar tone by pedals and directly to Audient Sono interface, and it has a cab simulator and tube preamp but I never use the tubes cause I already added the tube color to my tone after the gain pedals. I have tube compressor/pre and power that I control my gain by that. it has two tubes, one for power and one for preamp, that keeps my sound sharp because if I add tube after modulations and reverb and delay it would be worse frequency issue. the intro has 4 tracks, one for drums, one for bass and two for clean and distortion guitar. I recorded my clean sound by Stratocaster bridge pickup and only overdrive (gain off) and chorus small clone.

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From the last term, I’m still working on performing skills with my drummer, who is one of my friends from Turkey that I met at work last summer. We started practicing before this educational year, but the process is going slowly, even with weekly rehearsals. He is a very good metal drummer, but it looks like he is not that serious about the band, because after all this time we can only play the first and third songs completely right which is really great for the assesment. He can’t play the fourth song because he doesn’t have a double kick pedal! Also, he got married and he is a responsible guy (not really, he is a lazy stoner, but that’s his excuse for me). I really need to find someone who is serious. The process is going slowly and that makes me afraid.

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have exported the verses track without drums to analyse how I wrote this part and how many tracks are playing in this part. as you see the verses include two parts, first started with a groovy sludge riff and after that we go into a blast beat and tremolo section. the most important thing, the main riff is playing in the whole parts and in the tremolo part, I just added two lead guitars that play different melodies but same root just only on single string tremolo and both of them panned fully to opposite sides of each other. for the groovy part, we have two tracks, one is playing the main riff matching on drums and the other one, which has a lower dynamic, plays up the roots. both tracks in the groovy parts are still playing on blast beat and only two left and right tremolo melodies added on the tracks.

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I have started some vocal training with one of my old masters from Iran, but she doesn’t live in Iran anymore. After the nationwide protests against the Islamic regime, she faced some trouble and moved to the USA. Since she is a Berkeley university graduate, she already had U.S. citizenship. Anyway, our classes are online. She sent me videos of the warm-ups, and I practice with them.

She said fry screaming, especially high-pitched fry, is dangerous for the voice and might affect the vocal cords. But anyway, I don’t feel good about my voice. My throat is always dry, and I feel pain there, maybe because I haven’t found my false cords yet and I’m still doing it the wrong way! I always feel pain and dryness in my throat and generally in my mouth.

I stopped smoking, but it’s hard to quit due to depression and anxiety challenges. I stopped this week, but still, nothing has changed. Once I get disappointed and stressed about it, I go back to smoking again. Such a big shame and despair! But anyway, I shared one of my warm-up recordings here as evidence.

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this is the tab for first song of the album, “Nefrineh Mar” my performing song that I have made last term for house band and I can use it for the new band members too. thankfully I have written the tab for this specific song and would have better focus on this.

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this week rehearsal I just found I’m in 4th week and still don’t have any other musician to play the song. even though this week rehearsal wasn’t really good. Deniz my drummer doesn’t have any practice, and he is practicing most of the time in rehearsal and that takes a lot of time for rehearsal and I usually just stop playing and try to explain for him what he should play on each part. but I can say he knows 70% of the song, but it just shows how the process is slow. also he canceled the next week rehearsal so I’m really afraid that’s gonna make the process really slow. also during this we practiced all other songs of the album and I have the bigger issues with other song especially the fourth one that needs double kick but he can’t do that. also this week my function was so weak, I don’t know if the wrong drum rhythm affected on my playing or I just need more practice. anyway I’m going to focus on my practicing this week. I hope I can replace Deniz with someone serious and active.

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I have been practicing first song a couple of times to get ready for rehearsing, this song is my chosen song for performing by end of the term as a performing song for assignment.

so I usually practice it with the backing track, but always while I’m playing with backing track and then in studio, I get confused. because it’s weirdly different and sounds different to me. I can say this is the easiest song I have made because if you pay attention to the elements of riffing you will find it reminds us of the early classic heavy metal or hard rock especially in the verses. first I made this, I wanted to make a speed black metal and use the style of speed and thrash, but I can say it’s more blackened rock, it has various changes like pre intro, outro, verses, bridge, breakdown, bridge, verses, bridge and outro. and in each one we have various drumming and riffing but still connected to each other and follow each other.

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Thankfully, I have found a great drummer. I met Kieran through Ayesha, a new death metal band. Kieran is happy with the project and he liked what I programmed for drums. Also, he introduced Amar, bassist and vocalist of Ayesha, and I have been in touch with him as well. Amar said he is more happy to work in a black metal band than a death metal one, and he is more of a black metal guy. Also, through his Indian/Kazakh background, he agreed to do the vocal part for Avazeboz in Persian and tried to learn it. I can’t trust that , I think he just said that, but he can’t do it and just gave me worthless hope!

Amar is studying at BIMM and Kieran at Waterbear. Also, Amar introduced a war metal guitarist who is pretty young and isn’t a student, but it looks like he is good. But another issue is that he lives in Lewes. Anyway, Kieran is in his hometown this week, but we set a rehearsal with my last drummer. Also, the last drummer agreed to leave the band due to his situation with his wife, he’s trying to get a divorce.

I sent my tabs to Amar and he learned the song really fast. It was unbelievable for me! Our first rehearsal went well, but our focus was on the first and third songs, the ones the drummer can actually play.

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this week for week 4 voice training I had a simple warm-up again. it’s not a hard one, just basic breathing and resonance practice. it feels like it’s bringing the sound more into my head and nose area, so I can feel the vibration better instead of forcing my throat. I think it’s supposed to help me control the false cords and avoid hurting my vocal cords more. it’s still weird for me because I’m used to just screaming straight from the throat like before, but this way feels lighter. I still don’t fully get the purpose but I think it’s preparing the voice before harder practices. I recorded it just to analyse how stable my sound is and if I’m getting better resonance without pain.

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My Constructing Songs, one performance and one audio.

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My Constructing Songs, one performance and one audio.

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My chosen constructing songs are the first one (“Nefrineh Mar”) and the third one (“Shabeh Doozakhi”).

Why I chose these two and why I think they show construction:

Because the first song is the fastest song of the EP by tempo and rhythm (style), and I can identify it as kind of speed/thrash/punk metal. But on the other hand, the third song is the slowest one by tempo, and the style that I can identify is more like sludge metal!

As I received a feedback in Spark class from one of the emo classmates, she complained that the third song isn’t black metal, and said it’s just sludge or even doom! I mean, that’s a good point, but as I said (and told her as well), black metal isn’t only Norwegian fast tremolo picking with blast beats. Especially recently, we have various types of black metal, and you can identify it as black metal by the style of vocal, text, and many other combined elements ,that gives you the freedom to go through all types of BM.

Also, another element of contrast is the meaning of lyrics. In the first song, you talk about your suffering and situation , it’s a requiem and sad song in meaning, where the god makes you suffer like Prometheus. And interestingly, this song is fast and more energetic.

On the other hand, the down-tempo third song is about when you come back for your revenge to kill god, and you sing god’s requiem.

These are constructing elements in my point of view and I tried to keep the contrast in both formal/musical and conceptual ways.

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We decided Amar be guitarist cause he is a good guitar player and finding a good guitarist for black metal genre is hard, then we go into find a bassist. We made and draw poster and print it and bring to every music center like GAK, Goodzilla Records, Small Pond, Brighton Electric and etc. But after that Jake, the Ayesha guitarist, joined us as a bassist but he doesn’t have any bass guitar, so I borrowed mine to him to practice. He is not a bassist but he will help us till we find a good bassist for band. I sent him some tabs and spent some times to teach him the bass part.

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in this screen record I shared the view of all tracks and project and played the song while recording and showing each part of the songwriting structure, each track and instrument. as you see the song started with a low dynamic intro and after that verses started that I explained before. after repeating two times of each verse, there is a bridge and there is a groovy part as a breakdown, then a bridge and we go back to the same verses in the beginning of the song and then outro. in the whole EP intro of the fourth song follows the outro of third song. the whole project is in F sharp key in the scales of minor or harmonic and double harmonic minor as they are common in BM. so the song started in F sharp minor and in the blast beat verses I only add two opposite panned guitars that play two kinda different melodies in F sharp double harmonic minor scale, then in the first bridge I start to change the scale immediately to double harmonic minor completely for the breakdown.

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after these two weeks training I have found that I can’t sing in high pitch notes. once I try to sing in high pitch my throat hurts. it’s all because I’m still not able to unlock my false cords then I don’t know how to do it. also the way that I need to scream for the songs mostly should be in high pitch and fry screaming. fry screaming is a bit hard because you need to control both vocal cords and false cords and it’s something between them. as I understand by my vocal trainer, I need to use a little bit my vocal cords to add tone for fry and high pitch screams. I already found the false cord by some exercises and jumping jack but still need to control, also need to control my breath. after practicing every day I feel a bit better in high pitch. but unfortunately always my throat is dehydrated and smoking a lot might affect. I still drink so much water but still doesn’t work.

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This is the whole ‘Shabeh Doozakhi’ Logic project that I’ve uploaded in the Drive link. You can check exactly what I did during this. Mostly, I haven’t used any plugins for my guitar tone, but only for the bass guitar I used one of the distortion bass plugins from the Logic VST pack. I didn’t change the EQ setup for that either.

For my guitar tone, I used my pedals, the tube interface, and the cab simulator built into the interface. My interface is an Audient Sono, which is specifically made for guitar and includes many high-quality cab simulators for both guitar and bass that you can save directly to the unit.

I will upload my guitar tone setup in the next post.

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Logic Project view, third song(Audiosong)

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Logic Project view, third song(Audiosong)

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This is a screenshot of the Logic project view. You will see that in the chorus part of each verse , while the verse riffs are still playing , I added two different melodic lead guitar parts with opposite full panning. In the middle of the song, there’s a different groovy 6/8 section, and I changed the key from F sharp to D sharp using relevant notes during the bridge. Then I returned to the original key (F sharp) and brought back the same riffs again.

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For the drums programming, I used one of the most and best useful tools, EZDrummer 3, black metal and death metal package, but I just got help by that. As you see, the drums part clearly (narcissist action:) has been written on guitar melodies. I just tried to find the closest rhythm in my head by these already samples and then I changed them by my own, like in every beat, especially in the intro, last bars of each verse (and first bar of that groovy part), and in the fills. Also, I did a massive drum sample editing in the whole song, and here is my drum kit I chose — it is the death metal drum kit.

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this week vocal training I focus on my breathing and increase the length of my breathing. the practice is completely for control and focus on true breathing. as I have some pain in my throat and while I practice I pressure my vocal cord and throat, this technique will help me to focus how to breathe the air by stomach diaphragm and stay on that instead of breast diaphragm that mostly affects on throat.still I feel burning and some pain in my throat I feel I’m damaging my voice I don’t know why? I’m quite sure I do the practice right but still can’t feel any development on my voice. the process about vocal is too slow, and I’m afraid how I’m gonna manage my vocal part of the song for the end of the term. if I couldn’t I should find a vocalist.

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I have been practicing the third song by myself to get ready for the rehearsal. I was thinking that I can replace the performing song and audio song together and instead of playing first song as performance I’ll do the third one and again opposite the same. the reason for that is I can play the third song by acoustic and make more contrast. unfortunately I don’t have any acoustic guitar in UK and I’m still not sure if the band can play it in acoustic style. but I strongly believe two different subgenre of metal, one fast tempo and one slow doom style is more contrast and also the real contrast is included in lyrics. but I need to find someone, someone who can fry scream in Persian language. as I said the lyrics are written by myself and just need to sing.

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This song, and these riffs I have recently made, is one of the longest songs with too many variety. I played each part only once to make it shorter and show how the riffs are working, as u see we have a 6/8 melodic tremolo part, and after that we go to a fast tremolo part and there is a tempo changing happening and also time signature changing to 4/4. It is common always changing the time signature from 4/4 to 6/8 and opposite in black metal and I did it many times, again we back to 6/8 nicely rhythmic part and then in the before the last bar of this section (pay attention the riff isn’t finished yet here) we move to a 4/4 different tempo part and we have another tempo changing after that and the song goes to outro. During this we will have a lot of dynamic changes as well that it will be clarified while I add drums.

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My guitar tone setup during all my projects.

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My guitar tone setup during all my projects.

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This is my setup for all my guitar tone, but for this recording project I can say this plus interface setting and cab simulator in the end. The first input is overdrive , I use it as booster for my clean and distortion tone. Drive and level are in 9 o’clock, tone is full. The next one is distortion. I use famous fuzz pedal, Big Muff, for black metal as distortion due to the cold tone of Big Muff that I like it has. And on Big Muff, turned the gain and tone knob full, and level in the 4 o’clock.

The next one is a tube compressor by EHX called Black Finger that I control the level and dynamic and gain by two pre and power tube amp on that and little bit compressor, so I can get and add a color of tube gains on my tone. The next one is chorus modulation that I recorded the intro of ‘Shabeh Doozakhi’ by that as a clean tone. The last one is my reverb. I usually use the hall reverb as it is common in black metal and in 9 or 10 o’clock.

I barely use my whammy for BM, but I got a plan to make some harmonic melody then I can add whammy to my music career as well like what exactly Death did on some melodic parts of its songs. In all the pedals, I turned fully the tone knob to get a sharp sound. I don’t use any EQ at all but I got a plan to get a graphic EQ and add it to my pedal board. Also there is a three-band EQ in my interfaceI will upload a photo how I set up that one.

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We have had almost weekly rehearsals with Avazeboz’s new members. Kieran is a great drummer , he’s learning fast. Also, Amar learned all the songs quickly. But I think Jake isn’t that serious about the band; he’s always missing parts of the songs and sections. I’m worried about that because it gives me overthinking , like, what if the EP isn’t actually good? In the recording files, it sounds really nice, but once we try to play it, especially the second song, it sounds horrible! but as I need to focus on first song as it is my chosen song for assignment, almost we

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almost failed at the vocal training. this is my last practice and after that my voice really damaged. now I lost my high pitch voice, as you hear in this warm up video while I’m trying to sing in high pitch notes I’m coughing cause a lot of pressure is on my vocal cords and throat, also the most important issue is my throat always is dehydrated and as much as I try to hydrate it doesn’t work. my vocal trainer said I should stop practicing otherwise my voice will receive a bad damage. I don’t know how to do the vocal part, haven’t found vocalist yet and that makes me worried how to manage this part. it’s a long time all my unfinished project failed cause I don’t have the vocal part but I have many demos but no vocal tracks. it’s quite disappointing.

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Played third song with backing track and received some feedback 

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Played third song with backing track and received some feedback 

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played the third song on Friday and received some feedback , as always. Everyone liked the song, but they asked how I want to show the constructing elements. The classmates and practitioner agreed it’s not a good idea to choose two songs from the same genre (metal generally), and they suggested I make one of them clean and the other one metal. But the point is, I can’t , and honestly, I hate making anything that isn’t metal. It’s impossible suffering for me as an only metal artist.

I believe metal has massive variety, and I can explore different subgenres while staying true to myself. I also believe my chosen songs already have enough constructing elements in terms of tempo, structure, mood, and lyrical concepts. But one of my biggest challenges right now is that I still can’t sing. My throat and vocal cords feel worse after all these days. It’s seriously affecting my mental health and making me extremely disappointed.

I don’t know how I’m going to perform my song if I still can’t sing. One of my strongest constructing elements is based on the lyrics and concept, but since the songs are in Persian, no one really understands the meaning , and that part gets lost.

In general, the situation is really stressful for me. My voice feels damaged, and I’m afraid I’m going to miss my plans. I’m trying to find an Iranian metalhead who can join us and do the vocals instead.

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These riffs belong to a song I uploaded the audio for in week 3 , the melodic Dissection–Worshiper style. I have been practicing the riffs to improve my muscle memory. Also, I’m gonna start covering some of my favorite black metal songs to improve my skills and songwriting experiences.this would help me to keep staying creative and increase the guitar techniques by warming up in tremolo picking and chord changing in high tempo.

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in this week I have got this practice to warm up and stay tuned. these don’t help at all for singing in screaming. I think these warm ups are necessary for developing the range of voice and tone and breathing well. also focusing on the bottom diaphragm helps a lot, but that doesn’t help for fry screaming. as I mentioned many times that my throat hurts while I try to sing or even talking recently she said fry screaming is really hard and risky about the voice. also she believes it’s better for me to do only false cord screaming like growling but I don’t really like that and I’m not sure it would be good in this type of lyrics. I mean it’s good for some parts of the song but most parts should be in fry screaming. I still keep doing the warm ups hope my voice gets better soon.

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Managing my SMART goals has been harder than I expected. I thought just having a clear goal would keep me on track, but in reality there are too many unexpected things, like my throat problems, bandmates not being serious, and time going faster than I plan. I learned that breaking the big goal into small tasks works better. For example, instead of thinking “form the band,” I just focused on sending tabs, arranging one rehearsal, or finding one person at a time. I also realized I can’t rely fully on others; sometimes I have to prepare a backup plan, like recording vocals myself even if I’m not fully ready. I’m still struggling with time management because of stress and overthinking, but at least I can see progress even if it’s slow.we almost stopped the Avazeboz activities and rehearsals because rehearsing without the singer is literally wasting time. I’m going to fix my voice even if it costs I should do because I think I can’t find a vocalist in the Persian language that can sing the lyrics. it’s a complicated situation.

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Burning Avazeboz’s EP Demo onto a CD for some promoters London

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Burning Avazeboz’s EP Demo onto a CD for some promoters London

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Unfortunately, I couldn’t find any vocalist over there, but the good point is I received a lot of great feedback about the EP from a bunch of people. Once some black metal dudes and artists realized I’m another Iranian anti-Islamic black metal project, they got really interested. I’ve stayed in touch with some of them through Instagram and gave them demo CDs. Also, a promoter from Arcane Archivist Zine, one of the best black metal magazines, was really excited about what I’m doing. He gave me a free magazine and took my CD.

. Another great thing , I found an amazing black metal bassist from a Hellenic black metal band called Vestia. After he listened to the CD demo, he said he’s interested in joining us, which is really great. also received positive feedback from Shayan and other people I gave the demo CD to.

Everything is going well in that case, but the main issue that makes me extremely worried is that I still don’t know what to do about vocals. That’s making me depressed as hell, and I’m scared of losing my opportunities and chances. My voice is damaged , every single word I say hurts , and I need to recover soon. Unfortunately, private surgery is too expensive and I don’t know what to do. I really hope I can figure it out soon.

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I tried to keep my throat and mouth moist. I stopped smoking, drank a lot of water, tried not to talk at all for 3 days many times, and gave my vocal cords some rest. I’ve been steaming 5 times a day (almost all the time) and added a special liquid for the voice in the steamer. I’m also taking vitamins that are specialized for the voice. I’ve tried almost everything, but I still feel a burning in my throat and it’s always dry.

My practitioner said I should stop doing any vocal training if it hurts, because I might have a vocal cord injury and need to get a scan and diagnosis. But it’s expensive , just the diagnosis costs around £450. I don’t know what to do. If I pay for that, I’ll lose a lot of money. But if I don’t, I’ll fail all my plans. This is extremely increasing my depression and overthinking.

These days, I feel like I’m just living in a hellish situation and going crazy. This issue is making me extremely worried and stuck in my head. But the only good thing about all this stress is that I’ve been playing guitar like a mad lost man.

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I had online mentoring with Louise Nicholls about my throat and damage, what she advised me to do to heal. she also, like my vocal trainer, said I need to stop practicing at all till my throat pain heals. also she said I should rest my voice and not talk at all for three days, also cold steaming would be helpful, but I explained I already have done all these and tried many ways but still the same. then she advised me to see a doctor but unfortunately the process with NHS will take longer than 6 months to diagnose it. I already claimed for it but I don’t know for how long I will be in queue. it is sad to see everything is ready but you lost the last piece of puzzle. I mean singing is that piece. my last chance is finding a singer but due to the condition of songs it’s pretty hard.

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Covering "Ride The Wings Of Pestilence" by Black Metal band "Dawn"

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Covering "Ride The Wings Of Pestilence" by Black Metal band "Dawn"

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I’ve started covering some of my favorite black metal riffs, which helps me manage my stress and stay focused. Honestly, it’s one of the few things keeping me grounded right now playing guitar feels like meditation for me. It’s my good addiction. I think over the last year, there have only been maybe ten days total when I didn’t play guitar. Almost every single day, I play for long hours.

But playing guitar alone isn’t enough. I need to sing or at least find a singer , and that’s even harder to do in a foreign country than singing myself. I honestly don’t know what to do. I never imagined this situation would happen. Maybe it’s time to start looking into surgery sessions.

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Rehearsing third song with Avazeboz members.

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Rehearsing third song with Avazeboz members.

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We had our last rehearsal with Jake, the ex-bassist of Avazeboz. After that, I started working on writing out bass tabs for all the songs for Max , the bassist from Vestia , who’s interested in joining us. Since Kieran is going back to his city, Edgam, and Max lives in London, our next rehearsals will take place in London.

What worries me the most is the vocals. The guys always ask me what I’m going to do about vocals, and that question gives me extreme anxious and overthinking.

I wasn’t able to do my performance assignment, and I’m scared I’ll fail because there’s no vocal track. I feel like it’s ridiculous to just play the riffs without vocals. That’s what I’m thinking, at least , but when I compare my work musically to the other classmates (who mostly play four-chord progressions in alt/punk/emo styles), I still believe my instrumental work is stronger, even without vocals. I just don’t know if it’ll be accepted or not.

Honestly, I’m really disappointed about everything right now. The issue with vocals has become like a nightmare that constantly haunts me , it’s eating away at me.

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unfortunately Jake wants to leave us because he isn’t that serious about the band and when he understood Vestia bassist wants to join us he is happy to focus on his other bands. the rehearsal isn’t good, Kieran doesn’t know the second and third song completely but it’s ok because we can play the first as it is important for assignment, but Jake still doesn’t play it right, so we decided to decrease his volume so we can make video for assignment. honestly I am worried to play that on stage because it doesn’t have vocal!! and we almost don’t have bass! but I have heard from tutors I can make video in rehearsal session for assignment so that way is too helpful to make an evidence of my work.

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Throughout this term, I followed a weekly timeline to achieve my main goals: preparing two songs (Nefrineh Mar for performance and Shabeh Doozakhi as the DAW/audio track), improving black metal guitar techniques, and resolving the vocal situation for live performance.

Weeks 1–2:

I set my SMART goals and started planning the band lineup. I finalized the structure and meaning of the two chosen songs and began practicing the first song’s breakdowns. I also started vocal training, though I felt discomfort in my throat.

Weeks 3–4:

Rehearsals started with my Turkish drummer friend, but progress was slow due to his lack of seriousness. I practiced the third song for DAW recording and continued online vocal warm-ups with my teacher from the USA.

Weeks 5–6:

I finalized why I chose these two songs based on contrasting styles (fast tempo speed/thrash vs. slow sludge/doom). I programmed drums for the third song in Logic and shared the Logic project view. At the same time, I started searching for better bandmates and got some interest from Amar and Jake.

Weeks 7–8:

Weekly rehearsals continued with mixed results—some members were serious, others were unreliable. I played the third song with backing tracks and received class feedback. I struggled with my damaged vocal cords, which made me anxious and unsure about performing vocals.

Weeks 9–10:

I promoted the EP demo in London and connected with other black metal artists. I burned CDs and gave them to promoters. I found a potential bassist from the band Vestia. However, my vocal health worsened, and I couldn’t perform the songs as planned. I ended up playing a new alternative-style song with the house band just to complete the assignment, although I didn’t like it compared to my true style.

Reflection:

My timeline showed some successes, like composing and recording the two songs, programming drums, and improving my guitar tone. also connected with new bandmates and promoters. But I faced big challenges with unreliable members and vocal damage, which delayed my plan for live performance.that is the cause of these successes don’t help since I haven’t got my vocal tracks! the most important part is missed and that’s the only issue.

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Played a new thing(made by house-band guitarist!) with house-band

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Played a new thing(made by house-band guitarist!) with house-band

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well as I know and had experience about last term, houseband are not extreme metal musician and they couldnt play my song! so they offerd me to make another song only for asignment to play and pass. and the song can be more clean, kinda pop style or i can say somthing alternative. well i liturly didnt make anything by that just a gutarist gave me an idea and melodies and i tried to play it in my style, like tremolo but they said for constracting do not play tremolo. they are kinda right and they all have been happy by result but I was the only one who isnt happy. I didnt like that at all, I wanna play my song and I believe it has enough constructing as I mentioned one of the songs are in speed metal and the other is sludge/doom. and also there are many elements i mentioned for constructing. anyway I know I couldnt play any of my style with house band, cause extreme metal is somthing specific not for general musicians.

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here is the final reflection statement in 1000 words about the whole term and activities following the assessment.