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Me: Hey KGB Agent, I have vital information on the Atomic Bomb that I need to share with you!

KGB Agent: Awesome! Thank you, because of your espionage we will be able to make our weapons much faster than we would have been able to otherwise!

19 June 1953

Me: Today my wife and I are going to be executed for passing this information to you. Please help defend our deaths.

KGB Agent: I apologize that this is happening, but we will make sure everyone knows your death was unjustly!

I will say, "He didn't understand anything about the atomic bomb, and he couldn't help us. And still they killed them. It was a contract murder."

Me: That sounds great. It was nice knowing you!

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Cold War Spy / Ukrainian Cowboy · Josie Cotton