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Please send any content suggestions/book requests/complaints/ anything else on:

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Please send any content suggestions/book requests/complaints/ anything else on:

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beyondthebinary21@gmail.com.

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Noah and Jude Sweetwine are twins. As they enter their teen years, they grow apart. This is partly due to their sibling rivalry, as they compete for the attention of their mother, Dianna; and partly due to their struggle to be able to understand their separate identities.

Age rating: 13+

Ways to read: Click on this link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1a9_3FF-fMk7Ue-ptD64hyylg6lvdcd61/view?usp=sharing

Other ways to read: Kindle, Audible, Buy on Amazon

Language: English

Genres: Young adult, Fiction, Queer

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They Both Die at the End is a devastating yet uplifting story about two people whose lives change over the course of one unforgettable day. On September 5, a little after midnight, Death-Cast calls Mateo Torrez and Rufus Emeterio to give them some bad news: They’re going to die today. Mateo and Rufus are total strangers, but, for different reasons, they’re both looking to make a new friend on their End Day. The good news: There’s an app for that. It’s called the Last Friend, and through it, Rufus and Mateo are about to meet up for one last great adventure—to live a lifetime in a single day.

Age rating: 14+

Ways to read: Click on this link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qGKsuoq-q2-eAZdlJTublZXFpE62xTh5/view?usp=sharing

Other ways to read: Kindle, Audible, Buy on Amazon

Language: English

Genres: LGBT Literature, Young adult, Adventure fiction

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Coming Out Handout: What to do and what not to do when someone comes out to you

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Coming Out Handout: What to do and what not to do when someone comes out to you

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The award-winning show is known for its strong representation amongst the LGBT community and communities that include people of color. It is a reboot of the series of the same name, featuring a new Fab Five: Antoni Porowski, food and wine expert; Tan France, fashion expert; Karamo Brown, culture expert; Bobby Berk, design expert; and Jonathan Van Ness, grooming expert. The all new fab five serve up hip tips, emotionally charged makeovers and heartfelt reveals that bring out all the feels.

Age rating: 13+

Queer characters: Antoni Porowski, Tan France, Karamo Brown, Bobby Berk, Jonathan Van Ness

Where to watch: Netflix

Language: English

Genres: Reality TV, Lifestyle, Makeover

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When smart but cash-strapped teen Ellie Chu agrees to write a love letter for a smitten jock, she doesn’t expect to become his friend or fall for his crush.

Age rating: 13+

Queer characters: Ellie Chu portrayed by Leah Lewis

Where to watch: Netflix

Language: English

Genres: Romantic Comedies, American coming-of-age comedy-drama films

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When their preschooler’s gender non conformity seems like more than just a phase, a middle-class couple hits a rough spot in their marriage. Is it too soon to say that their precocious kid is transgender? What if it affords a school-admissions advantage?

Age rating: 13+

Queer characters: Jake portrayed by Leo James Davis

Where to watch: Netflix

Language: English

Genres: Social Issue Dramas, Transgender-related Films

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Writer Laurie Frankel has written a novel about a family with five boys in which the youngest feels he's something entirely different — a girl. It's called This Is How It Always Is, and it's a story that's close to Frankel's heart because she's living it: Her own child was born a boy and now identifies as a girl.

Age rating: 13+

Ways to read: Click on this link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1RR2lflRKEq2qX95FnHhuo1kHL-Dv2NFF/view?usp=sharing
Other ways to read: Kindle, Audible, Buy on Amazon

Language: English

Genres: Transgender fiction, Domestic Fiction

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Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe

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Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe

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The novel follows two Mexican-American teenagers, Aristotle "Ari" Mendoza and Dante Quintana, their friendship, and their struggles with racial and ethnic identity, sexuality, and family relationships. The book is divided into six sections. In each part we see the two main characters discovering more about themselves.

Age rating: 10+

Ways to read: Click on this link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1gRZibkBjcSf5H74TyiONylgt5iiJZp5_/view?usp=sharing

Other ways to read: Kindle, Audible, Buy on Amazon

Language: English

Genres: Contemporary, Young adult, Fiction, Queer

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Queeristan is a memoir, manifesto by Parmesh Shahani, who is an out and proud gay man. Being the vice president of Godrej Industries Ltd, he uses his influence to push for LGBTQ inclusion in India, specially the corporate world.

Age rating: Unspecified

Ways to read: Clickon this link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1vuC4OpBMaPo1x5cNMwmY5Aygp-icTxg-/view?usp=sharing
Other ways to read: Kindle, Audible, Buy on Amazon

Language: English

Genres: Non fiction

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After getting caught with another girl, teenager Cameron Post is sent to a conversion therapy center by her strict guardians where treatment consists in repenting for feeling "same sex attraction." Cameron befriends fellow “sinners” Jane and Adam, thus creating a new family to deal with the surrounding intolerance.

Age rating: 18+

Queer characters: Cameron portrayed by Chloë Grace Moretz, Jane portrayed by Sasha Lane, Adam portrayed by Forrest Goodluck

Where to watch: Unspecified

Language: English

Genres: Romance, Drama

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Understanding the Complexities of Gender

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Understanding the Complexities of Gender

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Understanding the Complexities of Gender: Sam Killermann at TEDxUofIChicago

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Toilets, bowties, gender and me | Audrey Mason-Hyde | TEDxAdelaide

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The Gender Bread Person- Identity, Expression, Sex, Attraction

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The Gender Bread Person- Identity, Expression, Sex, Attraction

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46 Terms That Describe Sexual Attraction, Behavior, and Orientation

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46 Terms That Describe Sexual Attraction, Behavior, and Orientation

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Sexuality has to do with the way you identify, how you experience sexual and romantic attraction (if you do), and your interest in and preferences around sexual and romantic relationships and behavior.

Who your sexual or romantic partner is at a given moment in time doesn't necessarily define this part of who you are. Sexuality can be fluid - changing in different situations for some, and over the years for others.

Observing patterns in sexual and romantic attraction, behavior, and preferences over time is one way to better understand your sexual identity or romantic orientation.

Familiarizing yourself with language that describes different types of sexual and romantic feelings and orientations will help you, your partners, and your friends navigate and understand the many ways people experience and identify their sexuality.

Allosexual

A word and category describing those who experience sexual attraction. Use of this term helps to normalize the experience of being asexual and provides a more specific label to describe those who aren't part of the asexual community.

Allosexism

This refers to norms, stereotypes, and practices in society that operate under the assumption that all human beings experience, or should experience, sexual attraction.

Allosexism grants privilege to those who experience attraction and leads to prejudice against and erasure of asexual people.

Androsexual

A term used to communicate sexual or romantic attraction to men, males, or masculinity. This term intentionally includes attraction to those who identify as men, male, or masculine, regardless of biology, anatomy, or sex assigned at birth.

Asexual

Asexual identity or orientation includes individuals who don't experience sexual attraction to others of any gender.

Also referred to as "aces," some people who are asexual do experience romantic attraction to people of one or multiple genders.

Aromantic

A romantic orientation the describes people who experience little or no romantic attraction, regardless of sex or gender.

Autosexual

A person who's sexually attracted to themselves. Someone's desire to engage in sexual behavior such as masturbation doesn't determine whether they're autosexual.

Autoromatic

A romantic orientation that describes a person who's romantically attracted to themselves. Those who identify as autoromatic often report experiencing the relationship they have with themselves as romantic.

Bicurious

This refers to people who are questioning or exploring bisexuality, which typically includes curiosity about one's romantic or sexual attraction to people of the same or different genders.

Bisexual

A sexual orientation that describes those who experience sexual, romantic, or emotional attractions to people of more than one gender.

Also referred to as "bi," bisexual typically includes individuals who are attracted to a variety of people, with genders that are similar to and different than their own.

Biromantic

Those who experience romantic attraction, but not sexual attraction, to individuals of more than one gender.

Closeted

Closeted, also referred to as "in the closet," describes people in the LGBTQIA+ community who don't publicly or openly share their sexual identity, sexual attraction, sexual behavior, gender expression, or gender identity.

Closeted is often understood as the opposite of "out," and refers to the metaphorical hidden or private place a LBGTQIA+ person comes from in the process of making decisions about disclosing gender and sexuality.

Some individuals may be out in certain communities but closeted in others, due to fear of discrimination, mistreatment, rejection, or violence.

Coming out

A phrase that refers to the process of being open about one's sexuality and gender. For many LGBTQIA+ people, "coming out" isn't a one-time event, but a process and series of moments and conversations.

Also described as coming out of the closet, this process can include:

sharing about a same-gender or similar gender sexual or romantic attraction or experience

identifying as LGBTQIA+

disclosing one's specific gender identity, gender expression, or sexual or romantic orientation

Some LGBTQIA+ people decide to keep their sexuality, gender, or intersex status private, while others decide to share these things with loved ones, acquaintances, or the public.

The process of coming out or the state of being out is a source of self-acceptance and pride for many (but not all) LGBTQIA+ individuals.

However, it's important to remember that each person's coming out experience is different, and the act of coming out can be hard and emotional.

The decision to come out is deeply personal. Each person should make decisions about disclosing sexuality and gender in their own time and manner.

Cupiosexual

Cupiosexual describes asexual people who don't experience sexual attraction but still have the desire to engage in sexual behavior or a sexual relationship.

Demisexual

On the asexual spectrum, this sexual orientation describes individuals who experience sexual attraction only under specific circumstances, such as after building a romantic or emotional relationship with a person.

Demiromantic

This romantic orientation describes individuals who experience romantic attraction only under specific circumstances, such as after building an emotional relationship with a person.

Fluid

This terms refers to the fact that sexuality, sexual attraction, and sexual behavior can change over time and be dependent on the situation.

It's used to describe those who experience shifts in their sexuality, sexual attraction, or sexual behavior in different situations or throughout the course of their lifetime. You may hear someone describe their sexuality as "fluid."

Gay

A term that describes individuals who experience sexual, romantic, or emotional attraction to people of the same or a similar gender.

Some gay-identified women prefer the term lesbian, while others prefer queer or gay. It's also best to ask which word or term someone uses to describe themselves.

The fields of medicine and psychology previously referred to this sexual orientation as homosexual. Homosexual is now viewed as an outdated and offensive term and shouldn't be used to refer to LGBTQIA+ individuals.

Graysexual

Graysexual is a term used to acknowledge the gray area on the sexuality spectrum for people who don't explicitly and exclusively identify as asexual or aromantic.

Many people who identify as graysexual do experience some sexual attraction or desire, but perhaps not at the same level or frequency as those who identify their sexuality as being completely outside of the asexual spectrum.

Grayromantic

A romantic orientation that describes individuals whose romantic attraction exists in the gray area between romantic and aromantic.

Many people who identify as grayromantic do experience some romantic attraction, but perhaps not at the same level or frequency as those who identify their sexuality or romantic orientation as something other than asexual.

Gynesexual

A term used to communicate sexual or romantic attraction to women, females, or femininity.

This term intentionally includes attraction to those who identify as women, female, or feminine, regardless of biology, anatomy, or the sex assigned at birth.

Heterosexual

A term that describes people who experience sexual, romantic, or emotional attraction to people of the "opposite" gender (e.g. male vs. female, man vs. woman) or a different gender.

Both cisgender and transgender identified people can be heterosexual. This sexual orientation category is commonly described as straight.

Homosexual

An outdated term rooted in the fields of medicine and psychology that refers to individuals who experience sexual, romantic, or emotional attraction to people of the same or a similar gender.

Lesbian

A woman or female-identified person who experiences sexual, romantic, or emotional attraction to people of the same or a similar gender.

Some women who are lesbians may also refer to themselves as gay or queer, while others prefer the label lesbian.

LGBTQIA+

The acronym that often describes individuals who don't identify as exclusively heterosexual or exclusively cisgender.

The letters in the LGBTQIA+ acronym stand for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning, intersex, and asexual.

The + symbol in LGBTQIA+ refers to the fact that there are many sexual orientations and gender identities that are part of the broader LGBTQIA community, but aren't included as part of the acronym.

Libidoist asexual

A term used to describe an asexual person who experiences sexual feelings that are satisfied through self-stimulation or masturbation.

This label acknowledges that, for some people, acting on libido or sexual feelings doesn't necessarily involve sexual behavior with others.

Monosexual

A broad sexual orientation category that includes people who experience romantic or sexual attraction to people of one sex or gender. Monosexuality typically includes those who are exclusively heterosexual, gay, or lesbian.

Non-libidoist asexual

Referring to an identity on the asexuality spectrum, a non-libidoist asexual is someone who doesn't experience any sexual feelings or have an active sex drive.

Omnisexual

Omnisexual is similar to pansexual and can be used to describe individuals whose sexuality isn't limited to people of a particular gender, sex, or sexual orientation.

Pansexual

A term that describes individuals who can experience sexual, romantic, or emotional attraction to any person, regardless of that person's gender, sex, or sexuality.

Panromantic

A term that describes individuals who can experience romantic, or emotional (but not sexual) attraction to any person, regardless of that person's gender, sex, or sexuality.

Polysexual

A term that describes individuals with a sexual orientation that involves sexual or romantic attraction to people with varying genders. Polysexual orientations include bisexuality, pansexuality, omnisexuality, and queer, among many others.

Pomosexual

A term (not necessarily an identity) used to refer to those who reject sexuality labels or don't identify with any of them.

Passing

Passing refers to society's perceptions and assumptions of someone's sexuality or gender.

Specifically, this term is most commonly used to discuss the frequency and extent to which an LGBTQIA+ person is perceived as or assumed to be straight or cisgender.

It's important to note that some LGBTQIA+ people have the desire to pass while others do not. In fact, the act of being perceived as straight or cisgender can be a source of discomfort and discrimination for some in the LGBTQIA+ community.

Queer

An umbrella term that describes individuals who aren't exclusively heterosexual. The term queer (the Q in LBGTQIA+), acknowledges that sexuality is a spectrum as opposed to a collection of independent and mutually exclusive categories.

Use of the word queer opens up options beyond lesbian, gay, and bisexual to individuals who don't fit neatly into these categories or prefer a category that isn't dependent on sex and gender.

While this term once had negative and derogatory connotations, queer has resurfaced as a common and socially acceptable way for LGBTQIA+ individuals to refer to themselves and their community.

Despite its growing use, some people still have negative associations with the word queer and don't like to be referred to in this way. Queer, like all terms describing sexuality, should be used sensitively and respectfully.

Questioning

The process of being curious about or exploring some aspect of sexuality or gender. Questioning can also be used as an adjective to describe someone who's currently exploring their sexuality or gender.

Romantic attraction

The experience of having an emotional response that results in the desire for a romantic, but not necessarily sexual, relationship or interaction with another person or oneself.

Some people experience romantic attraction but don't experience sexual attraction.

Romantic orientation

Romantic orientation is an aspect of self and identity that involves:

how you identify

the way you experience romantic desire (if you do)

the gender(s) or sex(es) of the people who someone engages in romantic relationships with (if any)

the gender(s) or sex(es) of the people someone is romantically attracted to (if any)

Sapiosexual

A word used to describe those who experience attraction based on intelligence, rather than sex or gender.

Sexual attraction

Sexual attraction refers to experiencing sexual desire or arousal in relation to another person or group of people.

Sex-averse

Sex-averse describes those who are asexual and are averse to or extremely disinterested in sex or sexual behavior.

Sex-favorable

On the spectrum of asexuality, sex-favorable is viewed as the "opposite" of sex-repulsed and describes those who are asexual, and in certain situations can have favorable or positive feelings toward sex.

Sex-indifferent

Sex-indifferent describes those who are asexual and feel indifferent or neutral about sex or sexual behavior.

Sexual orientation or sexuality

Sexual orientation or sexuality is an aspect of self that involves:

how you identify

the way you experience sexual or romantic desire (if you do)

the gender(s) or sex(es) of the people who someone engages in sexual or romantic activity with (if any)

the gender(s) or sex(es) of the people someone is attracted to (if any)

Sexuality can change over the course of someone's life and in different situations. It's understood to be a spectrum instead of a series of mutually exclusive categories.

Sex-repulsed

Similar to sex-averse, sex-repulsed is on the spectrum of asexuality and describes those who are asexual and are repulsed by or extremely disinterested in sex or sexual behavior.

Skoliosexual

A sexual orientation that describes those who are sexually attracted to people with non-cisgender gender identities, such as people who are nonbinary, genderqueer, or trans.

Spectrasexual

A term that describes people who are sexually or romantically attracted to multiple or varied sexes, genders, and gender identities - but not necessarily all or any.

Straight

Also known as heterosexual, straight describes people who experience sexual, romantic, or emotional attraction to individuals of the "opposite" gender (e.g. male vs. female, man vs. woman) or a different gender.

People who identify as cisgender and transgender can be straight.

It's okay to feel unsure or overwhelmed by all of the labels we now have to describe sexual and romantic orientation, attraction, and behavior.

Expanding the language you use to describe your sexuality can provide important guidance, validation, and access to community while on your journey of sexual self-discovery and satisfaction.
Mere Abrams is a researcher, writer, educator, consultant, and licensed clinical social worker who reaches a worldwide audience through public speaking, publications, social media (), and gender therapy and support services practice onlinegendercare.com. Mere uses their personal experience and diverse professional background to support individuals exploring gender and help institutions, organizations, and businesses to increase gender literacy and identify opportunities to demonstrate gender inclusion in products, services, programs, projects, and content.

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46 Terms That Describe Sexual Attraction, Behavior & Orientation

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Sexuality has to do with the way you identify, how you experience sexual and romantic attraction (if you do), and your interest in and preferences around sexual and romantic relationships and behavior. Who your sexual or romantic partner is at a given moment in time doesn't necessarily define this part of who you are.

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A quick guide to understanding bisexuality

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A quick guide to understanding bisexuality

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All the letters in the LGBTQIA+ family have their own unique challenges - and being bisexual is no different. If you identify as bisexual, you may have faced some of the challenges that come with that identification. Bi erasure, not feeling gay or straight enough, and a general lack of understanding can all leave you feeling down. In fact, the bisexual community faces higher rates of anxiety and depression than the straight, gay and lesbian communities.

This quick guide provides some easy tips for handling the challenges of being bisexual. We've also included some info to help you smash some of the common myths about bisexuality.

What is bisexuality?

The Bisexual Resource Centre defines bisexuality broadly as 'people who experience physical, emotional, sexual, and romantic attraction to people of more than one gender'. The term has become an umbrella for a few different orientations, including pansexual, omnisexual and sexually fluid. Identifying as bisexual doesn't mean you have to have sexual or romantic experiences with multiple genders - just being attracted is enough.

The bisexual community faces a lot of misunderstanding - from the straight and queer communities equally. Because of this, there are a few myths about what it really means to be bisexual. So, let's break them down and debunk them once and for all.

1. Bisexuality isn't 'just a phase'

While your sexual identity may change over the course of your life, nothing is ever 'just a phase'. Labelling it that way just makes it seem like it's not real and takes away from your experience. Sexual identities aren't fixed, and changing who you're attracted to doesn't erase who you were before.

2. Bisexual people aren't just indecisive

Identifying as bisexual doesn't mean you can't decide whether you're gay, lesbian or straight. You wouldn't accuse someone who likes both ice cream and pizza of being indecisive, so why should it be any different for sexuality?

3. Bisexuality isn't easier than being gay or lesbian

The challenges that face the bisexual community are unique. But while they're different from those faced by other parts of the queer community, they're no better or worse.

4. Bisexual people don't become straight or homosexual when they're in a relationship

If you identify as bisexual and you're in a same-sex relationship, that doesn't make you homosexual. The same goes for being in a heterosexual relationship: it doesn't make you straight. You can still be bisexual either way. Your family and friends and lovers might assume your sexuality based on the gender of your partner, but those assumptions will be wrong.

The American actor Stephanie Beatriz explains: "To be bi is a continual series of coming-out moments... You'll come out again and again and again to every person you'll ever date..." Check out what she's got to say here.

A lot of these myths come from simple misunderstandings, or from trying to fit people into neat boxes. As with most things in life, bisexuality is much more complex than that. It's important to understand that identity and sexuality are fluid and can change at any time - so, don't feel the need to define yourself and make it permanent.

Dealing with bi erasure and biphobia

Bi erasure is the incorrect belief that bisexuality isn't a real thing. A lot of people, from both the straight and LGBTQIA+ communities, can get caught up in the myths we've debunked above. Bisexual people can sometimes feel that when they're in a relationship, their attraction to other genders is questioned or ignored.

Biphobia refers to general discrimination against anyone who is bisexual. Even though they represent the largest group within the LGBTQIA+ spectrum, bisexual people experience high rates of discrimination by both the straight and queer communities. This discrimination could be obvious, in the form of biphobic comments, or it may be less obvious, such as feeling you're being left out of communities because of your partner's gender.

To be bi is a continual series of coming-out moments... You'll come out again and again and again to every person you'll ever date.

Experiencing bi erasure and biphobia can really take its toll on your mental health. Feeling like you don't belong, or that you're not accepted or understood, or that you're being treated differently because of your bisexuality is common, but that doesn't make it okay.

If you've had an experience like this, and want to know how to handle it proactively, here are some tips:

Take time out from the situation or person who's made you feel this way. You're the most important person in this, so make sure you take care of your mental health. You don't have to cop poor treatment or discrimination, so feel free to remove yourself from any situation that makes you feel bad.

Engage with people who understand and support you. Whether it's family and friends, or members of the LGBTQIA+ community online, there are people who have your back. Let them celebrate what makes you, you. Check out our tips below for getting involved with the LGBTQIA+ community.

While it's not your responsibility to educate the people around you, having a respectful conversation with someone who's upset you might help. Explain, from your point of view, why what they've said or done is hurtful even if they didn't intend it to be and were trying to do the right thing. Taking steps to clear up any confusion or misunderstanding may help change that person's behaviour towards you for the better and also make you feel more understood and connected to the people around you.

Your support options

If you identify as bisexual, there are people and organisations out there to help you.

The Bisexual Resource Centre has been supporting the bisexual community since the 1980s. Their amazing website is full of helpful information to help you explore your sexuality, tips for how to talk about it with friends and family, and ways to connect with other parts of the LGBTQIA+ world.

QLife is an Australian organisation working with all parts of the LGBTQIA+ spectrum. They've got an excellent online forum to help you connect with other bisexual young people, and great resources to support you while you explore your sexual identity.

Twenty10, an organisation supporting the LGBTQIA+ community in NSW, has great resources, including how to talk to friends and family about your sexuality.

For some great tips on how to talk to a trusted person about your sexuality, check out our piece on sexual identity here.

Be part of the family

The LGBTQIA+ community is an amazingly supportive place to be a part of - and that includes as a bisexual person. Joining online support groups, taking part in the forums, or even heading to an IRL meet-up is a great way to feel connected and supported as you explore your sexual identity.

To feel even more connected to the wider bisexual community, why not check out the Bi+ Visibility #Bseen campaign. These guys encourage bisexual peeps to upload selfies with the hashtag #BeSeen - to show just how big and diverse the bisexual family really is.

However you choose to identify, and however you share it with the world, remember that you're not alone. Keep exploring your sexual identity and the LGBTQIA+ community, and sharing your experiences with the people you love.

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Putting the B in LGBTQIA+: A quick guide to understanding bisexuality

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All the letters in the LGBTQIA+ family have their own unique challenges - and being bisexual is no different. If you identify as bisexual, you may have faced some of the challenges that come with that identification. Bi erasure, not feeling gay or straight enough, and a general lack of understanding can all leave you feeling down.