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Watch this clip. Is this attitude realistic to you? Why or why not? Comment on at least two of your classmates' posts.

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TOO HOT TO HANDLE SEASON 1 (2020) - Official Series Trailer | Vague Movie Trailers

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Read Chapter 6 in your textbook "Hooking Up" and watch the video below. In a short essay (3-4 paragraphs, headings, etc) do the following:

Summarize and the main points of both the video and the reading. Follow up with a compare and contrast.

Think about how what you knew and felt about casual sex and double standards before reading/viewing this material? What did you already know? Which aspects changed?

In your experience with your friends, family, and acquaintances, how accurate are these? Explain.

*You do not need to comment on your classmates' posts but you do need to read them.

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Terri Conley: We need to rethink casual sex

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Social psychologist and sex researcher Terri Conley thinks it's high time we stop feeling guilty about enjoying casual sex-no matter what society says. In this entertaining talk, Conley interrogates three common myths about sexuality and gender and suggests a few new, guilt-free ways to think about our sex lives.

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The content this week speaks a lot about "double standards" with regard to dating, sex, and expectations. Explain a specific example in which you have seen this play out- personally, on film/television/books, or in others.

Please comment on two of your classmates' posts!

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Please write at least two questions below that you would like to see on the final exam (T/F or multiple choice). They can be from any of the content (readings, powerpoints, student presentations, etc) after week 6.

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1. My initial reaction to the podcast was pretty mundane. As a person in college, I expected most of what was already said. Though unfortunate and depressing for so many young adulthoods to be deprived of intimacy, I also understand as to why they believe the things they do. One quote I specifically enjoyed was when a woman said I think it feels bad to be used. But I think the alternative is that nobody wants to use you. And I think that that's worse.

2. The difference for me is that the magnitude of ‘hooking up’ is not realistic to the whole college or young adulthood population. There are a lot of people who aren’t necessarily obsessed with sex. In addition, the podcast doesn’t touch upon those in the LGBTQIA+ community. The similarities are how intense these fears and feelings of intimacy can be.

3. Since ‘Labor of Love’ often retraces back within the centuries to compare and contrast the idea of ‘hooking up’, there are similarities in how those feelings as mentioned above are still evident and just as strong. The difference is the transparency, communication and education on ‘Hooking Up’.

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This attitude is not realistic to me whatsoever. The show, which I have seen before, focuses a lot on the materialistic and sexual side of ‘hooking up’ and love, versus intimacy and love. Despite many of the contestants wanting that connection, the show and the show’s perspectives or motive of showing these conventionally attractive people and their want for love and or sex.

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Within sex, there are many dating double standards like paying for the meal. This is something my boyfriend and I deal with a lot because 9 times out of 10, the server always puts or gives the bill directly to him, despite both of us wanting to pay or me treating him out to dinner.

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1. T/F- 'Hooking up' is a newly modern term.

2. T/F - Double standards is the act of treating all genders equally.

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1. I feel that this is very true but true in that they are talking about.  This isn't necessarily what happens in real life in some of what they talk about which I will talk about in number 2.
2. I haven't really noticed very many people in college hooking up outside of when they are in a fraternity or sorority.  This might just be because i'm not in any clubs that might have this happen but that's just what I've noticed.  Someone being in Greek life it seems like they have to have it at some points because there are parties all the time.

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1. Initially the podcast started very intense. With the murmuring of " hookup. " And as prompted by the intense introduction, the podcast  touched upon very serious topics. A comment that really captured the podcast's explicit theme of toxic hookup culture of college, is that of the unidentified women #7. Eomen #7  commented, "   I think girls know when they're being used. And I think it feels bad to be used. But I think the alternative is that nobody wants to use you. And that means that you're not hooking up with anybody. And I think that that's worse. " This comment was a great insight into college hookup culture as it showed the impact it can have on the emotional well-being of students.

2. I do not think there are differences between this video and what life is actually life. I feel that
there are unspoken rules of sex on college campuses. And the  students comments provided great insight to them. Also, I feel that the article did a great job describing the experience of all college students as it points out that there about a third of students won't hook up even a single time their entire college career. Still it highlights that doesn't mean that they're not surrounded by these really powerful ideas about what they should be doing.

3. This podcast describes the way young people in modern America approach dating similarly to the way  " Labor of Love " describes the way young people dated around the late 1940s. Both seem to emphasize that young people became more liberal in the way that they approach relationships. Nowadays, for many college students a relationship may begin after a casual hookup. The podcast notes that many adults see this to be strange and wrong. Around 1955, " going steady " was the most common way that students dated. Likewise, in " Labor of Love " , Moira Weigel points out that the first adults who noticed that teens were beginning to date this way found their behavior scandalous.

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To me all these kind of shows are so fake in everyway.  This is not realistic because when they say the sexiest people in the world they literally mean to certain people and these people on here are more of the traditional models type people.  This show tells me that only model type people can be this way whether it's feeling like they are a 10 or just being very sexual.  When in reality anyone can feel this way even if you aren't the model esc person.

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My attitude towards this is that I think this show is barbaric and unrealistic. First off, the producers purposely chose people that are extremely good looking, which provides viewers with an unrealistic representation of human beings. In addition, even though the show is about finding love, most of the people already established extreme sexual tension towards one another. Therefore, the intent to prevent sexual contact and improve emotional connection will not work due to the fact that the sexual tension is too strong. I think this show is more about providing viewers with reality entertainment rather than giving a sense of how humans find love. Not to mention, whenever there is a camera involved, there is definitely some sort of script being followed. Therefore, are these people even acting the way they normally act or are they playing a part to fill their egos?

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Honestly for me what I have seen and noticed is that in heterosexual situations the guy always has to be the one to make the first move and it just seems like when you are even a bit shy as a guy and you don't make the first move you are doomed to being single your whole life.  This has been something I have struggled with my whole life.  I've never been the type to make the first move when it comes to talking to girls unless it starts out online and even then.  I feel like someone needs to make it more openly acceptable for girls to go up to guys who seem shy then guy's having to do it with girls.

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In earlier generations, society had implemented ideas with regards to certain "roles" men and women have within a relationship. Now that we are in 2021, things have changed. There was a pre existing notion that the man has to make the first move, the man has to ask the girl out, the man has to pay, and the man is the bread winner. However, that is not the case today. Women now have a lot more independence than they did in earlier times. There is nothing wrong with the women making the first move, or asking a man out. Even during sex, women can be the ones that can initiate such actions. However, the rooted ideas within society from earlier times can sometimes prevent a women from being the initiator. Some women may feel shy or do not feel obligated to be more assertive. Shy women will wait until the man makes the first move, but sometimes the man is waiting for the woman. It is important that we as a society should step back from early tradition and realize that men and women have equal power within a relationship.

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Based on this podcast, my reaction was that I completely agree with these speakers.  The speakers were on point with how college hookup culture is actually about.  College hookup culture has been cultivated from years of new social norms and news ways of thinking about sex and relationships.
The differences presented in this video and in real life is that this podcast is mainly focusing on people that actually want to be involved in the college hookup culture.  The speakers only briefly mention the "non-participants" but there are actually a lot of people that do not want to have meaningless sex.  There are still those students that desire emotional connection and raw love.  In real life, at colleges, sex is not all the time on someone's mind.  Some people between the ages 18-22 may feel uncomfortable about sex and intimacy.
In "Labor of Love" and this podcast, both platforms talk about how sex has revolutionized modern society. Many people want to have sex to gain something whether it be a higher social status or simple pleasure. The differences presented in these two platforms is that "Labor of Love" talks about how men and women develop emotional connections through dating or "going steady." However, this podcast does not focus on the idea of "going out" in 2021.

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My initial reaction to this podcast was that I was expecting everything they said I wasn't shocked to hear any of it. Although it is sad a lot of college students these days are used to being used for sex, rather than an actual relationship.
I didn't pick up on any differences within this video and real life. They hit basically all of the main points. The way hookups were described in the podcast seems to be the way it is in a real life too.
The difference between this and "Labor of Love" is the way people communicate when it comes to hooking up, like the way you get to someone to hook up with you.

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No the attitude of the contestants in the clip is not realistic to me. With the chance to win $100,000 it
it hard to believe that everyone is having such a difficult time restraining from sex. From day one, the contestants seem abnormally horny. It is normal that a person  sees someone that is conventionally attractive and wants to have sex with them, but it is questionable when this hope overwhelms you with frustration. In all, I believe that the contestants played up their feeling and put on exaggerated personas for entertainment. Being that if the contestants didn't have such a difficult time keeping from sex the show would not be entertaining to watch.

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Double standards that can be in dating is the difference between the way that it is seen when a women makes the first move versus a man. If a woman expresses wanting a relationship, people judge her as needy or desperate. Versus a man, who is often encourage to make the first move as it often described as romantic and cute.

Double standards that can be in sex is the difference between the way people label a women who has had many sexual relations compared to a man. When a women is known to have had many sexual relations she is many times criticized to be " too easy ", " a slut " and " a whore. " Opposite to way men who are known to have many sexual relations are referred to. When a men is known to have had many sexual relations he is often hyped up and labeled as, " players."

Double standards that can be seen between genders is in the differences between expectations. An example would be how women are expected to dress versus men. As it is often expected that a women show up to an event with a nice outfit and tamed hair. And if a women decides not to put effort into the way they look for an event they are often criticized to have low-hygiene and to be lazy. It is often seen however that people are more easy to excuse men when they decide to put no effort in the way they look for an event. It is often excused to be okay simply because they are men, and to them the way they look doesn't matter.

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T/F: Our generation is having way more sex that our parents' generation.
T/F: The college hookup culture was a way to find love and develop deep emotional connections.

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In This Ted Talk, the women highlighted gender differences within society and how stereotypes influence opinions on others.  The speaker explained many myths with regards to men and women about sex.  In Chapter 6 of "Hookups," the author talks about the college hookup culture and the differences that men and women experience in the face of sexual encounters.  Both these platforms talk about how women in society often receive greater consequences than men when they have sex.  For example, both explain that women who are too sexually active are labeled as "sluts" where men are praised for it.  This idea is definitely true as society shames women for having too much sex.  The reason behind this could be possibly due to the fact that there is a rooted idea within society from generations ago that women were supposed to represent "modesty."  Now, modern day feminism is trying to step away from this idea and move towards social progression where causal sex is acceptable both ways.
The difference between these two videos is that the speaker of the Ted Talk mainly focused on sex and gender stereotypes.  While Chapter 6 of "Hookups" did indeed highlight sex and gender stereotypes, the author also talked about gender stereotypes within seeking relationships.  For example, the author pointed out that women seek relationships more often than men to create a form of "protection."
Before reading the chapter and watching the video, I felt like I already knew some of these things that were mentioned. For example, it was no shock to me to hear that women are slut shamed within society as I would hear my peers and friends use the word "slut" to describe some girl who would "put out" too much or is known to be sexually active. In addition, before entering college, I had no idea that this hookup culture would even be a thing. I thought I was able to meet someone in college and develop an emotional connection. However, I was wrong because the college lifestyle is so caught up in the idea of having casual sex. Therefore, finding a relationship in college is quite difficult.

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1. T/F- About a third of students won't hook up even a single time their entire college career.

2. T/F-  The students who enjoy hookup culture the most, are disproportionately going to be heterosexual, white, come from an upper middle class or wealthy background.

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I remember watching this show and although, I was intrigued, it wasn't realistic at all. Yeah they are attractive people, but it's a reality show so they all have parts to play to make it entertaining to the viewer. From the beginning, they already want to make out and have sex, and it's the same attitude throughout the whole show. When they do any sexual activity they lose money and they all end up splitting the money in the end. Literally this couple who everyone loved had the worse breakup after the show where they blocked each other and still talk bad about each other to this day.

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There has always been double standards between men and women. Specifically, from many movies I have seen, the man always makes the first move. I barely see women making the first move and it's sad because I know some men are too shy or have the fear of rejection.

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T/F: the women’s movement of the late 1960s and 1970s aimed to free

women of this kind of labeling by encouraging all women to embrace

their sexuality.
T/F: men are congratulated by their male peers for sexual conquests.

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1.) My initial reaction was not being surprised because I was aware of most of this reaction from the reading we have done and other previous knowledge.
2.) What they say in the podcast is similar to real life. There isn't any differences; I liked how they had students discuss hook ups because they know what it's really like.
3.) The difference this can have with a specific time in Labor of love is the "going steady" section. In the 1950s, people who were steady would belong to each other and not anyone else. With hooking up today, you can be with anyone you want for "pleasure". It can be similar because when people saw their peers going steady they had a sense of status in school, from wearing his varsity jacket and gaining popularity. Today, the podcast mentioned that most hook-ups are for status and telling you friends you had sex.

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1. My initial reaction to this podcast is that this is very true. I agreed when the speaker was  talking about the college hookup culture and how college students are a part of it. I was shocked to hear when she said that this culture is toxic because it can be. From people feeling being used to believing that they are weak for having feelings or wanting connection.

2. I believe that there really is much of a difference between the video and what it actually is in real life. For example, one of the speakers definiitatel explained how college party hookups come about. There are people that go to college parties and have hookups while under the influence because this is to show that it is a casual hookup and there are no intimate feelings between the two.

3.   A difference from this and
the during the time period of 1940’s/1950’s is that people from then and now start a new relationship very different. Back then teens were following the guidelines of going steady and now people tend to hookup and in some cases not take things slow.

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I believe that this attitude is very unrealistic to me because it wouldn't make sense for people to already want to create a sexual relationship with someone else on the first day of the show. It is obvious that the people on the how were asked to be a bit more dramatic on how they feel about not being able to have any relationship with people. It's even more unrealistic to have people that are good looking and have a nice summer body apart of the show.

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A double standard that I have seen a lot in movies and seen with real life situations is that men are told to be vulnerable. Also, that they should not express their feelings to a female, or reveal their
"soft" spot. It's unrealistic and crazy to say this because men have feelings and have the right to express their feelings as much as a female does. They are often seen as unmanly for wanting to express how they really feel and it' shame because there are men who decide not to do so since he will think he would get fun of for it.

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1. I honestly wasn't too surprised by what was discussed in the podcast. As a college student its not that hard to understand when I am currently involved in the situation they are studying and that we are talking about in class.
2.  I think there are some differences between what the podcast said with real life. I see many people in college that are in committed relationships. Hook-up culture has not destroyed long-term relationships for college students that the podcast makes you believe.
3. In "Labor of Love" they discuss relationships in college through a long period of time- from the late 1920s to current times. In the past, physical relationships were much more hush-hush since there was a greater stigma at the time. The students are still seeking out physical intimacy, it is simply more accepted nowadays.

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I really don't think this is realistic. I just do not think that people should be struggling so much with not having sexual relationship so quickly after meeting someone. Obviously people have urges and desires, but we also have self-control. I think their "struggles" have definitely been amplified for dramatic affect to make good television.

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T/F : " Hooking Up" has several meanings depending on who you ask.
What is "Petting" ?

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I enjoyed reading chapter 6 as well as listening to the video. They both talked about sex within gender roles, stereotypes, and relationships. In the video it really focused on gender differences and how women are talked about when they have casual sex versus men.

In the chapter one thing it talked about was slut shaming which I already knew is a huge thing. Why is it that when a women has sex with multiple people she is referred to as a slut but when a man has sex he is known to be big and bag. That is gender stereotype within sex.

The video more so focused on gender and stereotypes with casual sex. While the chapter focused more in on gender stereotypes when you are trying to find a relationship.

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I see double standards stand out a lot when the boy is expected to pay. It happens to my boyfriend and I a lot, we take turns paying for date nights or when we go out to dinner I pay sometimes and my friends think thats crazy. They expect their boyfriend's to pay for everything when it shouldn't be that way. Times are different these days.

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Teens are having more casual sex now than ever before? T?F
An intimate relationship can  mean something different to every person? T/F

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In chapter 6, they discuss the hook up culture in college. In the beginning of the video, Conely mentions how women know relationships won't stem from these hook ups and that same theme is mentioned in the book. For differences, I would say that the video focused more on gender differences in sex, where women are afraid to be stigmatized, while the book discusses more on the stereotypes of women in college. They both discuss how women are the ones who are labeled after having casual sex.
Before this, I was aware that hook ups were common in college and that women were the ones who would be called "sluts". Like the book mentioned, I knew that time was important for men; where they called girls sluts if they found out they had sex with them today, but just had sex with another man yesterday. What was new to me was the stats Conley was discussing in the video. She mentioned sundry statistics of STDs that I wasn't aware of.
Personally, I haven't experienced this in college yet. However, I believe this is very accurate from what I heard from friends or have seen on media. Overall, I agree with Conley, you shouldn't feel guilty after casual sex, it's in our human nature to feel pleasure.

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This is definitely unrealistic. This show makes it seem like these people just go through their life living and breathing sex and nothing else. Obviously that is what they are portraying. When in reality, sex is just a part of a relationship or someone's life and there are so many more complex dimensions to sex. Also, sex is defined differently by everyone. With that, just because this show makes it seem like only attractive people are horny all of the time and need sex - or whatever - doesn't mean anyone can or can't feel similarly.

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A double standard I see a lot is honestly just the role in general that women are expected to play. I ha a situation occur with a guy I was seeing and he said, "well women are supposed to do that." I thought my jaw fell out of my mouth. This happened a lot in that relationship. It was obvious his mother did his laundry and cleaned his room until he was out of college and when we started seeing each other he expected me to do all of those things for him now. We stayed together for a bit and he expected me to go grocery shopping, clean, laundry, make the bed, etc. So he could come home and take out the trash, eat, and sit on the couch. He though because (at the time) he made more money than me the he could pay for things and such and not have to help around. Needless to say, that relationship did not last long.

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My initial reaction was agreeing with a lot (maybe even all) of what they talked about. They brought up an interesting point about how students would rather sleep with someone they do not actually like versus someone they do. I think this might have to do with a fear of losing that person if the relationship does not work out. I think that this is similar to hook up culture in my experience. I also think that hook up culture is a precursor into rape culture. In the fact that it is difficult to establish certain boundaries after you have been drinking or partying and they may not be communicated clearly. Also, if hook up culture is someone's definition of a social status it might be difficult to express your feelings to someone you see superior than you in a social context. I think that these are all valid points.

I think the podcast is almost relative to any part of our book. In particular, I think of the going steady section. This was when students were going out on dates in cars and hooking up but not actually in a committed relationship. Almost like test driving a bunch of cars until you find the one. It's interesting how actually relevant that is to this hook up culture we have today. It was about social status, too. Men would give their varsity pins to the women to wear as a symbol of them going steady. I think this resonates deeper than we think within the hook up culture.

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I double standard I've seen is doctors believe female patients compared to male patients. It is proven that women are less likely to be believed when describing pain and symptoms and receive less pain medication than a man would receive for the same issue. This is very upsetting because this often leads to further health issues in women and even unneeded death.

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1) My inital reaction wasn't a shocked because I mostly was agreeing with them. On what they were saying about college students because it was true.
2) Also I agree with certain things , but there's a standard that when you go to college all you are going to see or hear is that people are hooking up that's not always true because there are people that is looking for love. Also most of the hooking up stems form greek life students.
3) Labor of Love was steming from relationship, dating and hooking up was like back then. Hooking up relates to now

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1) My initial reaction to the podcast was I agreed with most of the things they were stating such as the hook up culture in college. Hookup culture is very common now a days.
2) What I think while listening to this podcast is that they believe American students only have hookups, but that's not true college students can be committed to one and fully into the hookup culture.
3)As we know Labor of Love relates too dating back in the day. I feel as if the people speaking on the podcast were just relying on their previous years and the college hookups they've seen.

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This show is definitely unrealistic, having watched it before immediately it focused on "hookups, sex" rather than a real affectionate meaningful relationship with another human. But clearly this a show and they are going to portray the show to make it more intriguing to watch. everyone has a part to play.

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This seems unrealistic to me because they made seems like people couldn't stop hooking up for the amount of the days they were their. Yes I understand some people are addicted to sex , but it looks like they were doing it for enterainment for the show. There was money on the line too. Some people in real life don't have sex until marriage so they couldn't that for money seems weird.

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From watching the video and reading chapter 6 they both talk about hook up culture. During the video Terri Conley talks about how the women is perceived in a hookup. Women are judged more.
Reading chapter 6 it discusses once again hookup culture in college, how women are slut shamed and judged heavily based on what they chose to do. Within both chapter 6 and the ted talk it talks about the gender stereotypes and how sex is stigmatized.

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Double standards that I've seen is that some women believe men should confess their feelings first before they do. Women wait to see what the guy says this related also to the first move some people believe men should be the person to make the first move.

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The video and chapter 6 had similarites that women gets judged because they went to hookup with people, so people call them slut because they feel like women shouldn't present themselves like that.

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There are many double standard in dating and hooking up because like dating women feels like on valentine's day the women should get gifts. An example for hooking up women shouldn't hook up because it's not lady like. So they end up getting called a slut .

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This world feel like it's ok for the women to hooking up with anybody T/F
Dating Reality show for our entertainment T/F

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Hook up is the new term for sex T/F

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My initial reaction was that I already knew most of this. We are surrounded by this everyday, especially in college. I never really understood the whole random hookups thing. I never really went through that phase. I know a lot of people who are in meaningful relationships that started out as a random hookup. Not all random hookups end in disaster. A similarity between this podcast is that we are not more sexual than our parents' generation.

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I personally watched this show and thought it was very entertaining. Would I ever participate in something like this? Absolutely not. The fact that these people can't go a certain amount of time without being intimate with someone is sad. It's about self control. I think this show is definitely Hollywood-ized" because most people don't need to hookup every time they see someone who is attractive.

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There are so many double standards in society. Once instance that related to me is that girls have to emotional and vulnerable. I was never that emotional girl that cries every time she is sad or needs to spill her gut every time she gets her heart broken. I mostly just keep to myself and move on and I don't think that should be considered wrong.

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T/F: Our generation has more sex than the previous generation.
T/F: The average graduating college student has hooked up 8 times in college

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1.My initial reaction to the podcast was I wasn't that shocked to hear about hookups in college. I already knew what it was about. I wouldn't say college is the mostly about that but a lot people think so.

2.I would agree with most of the podcast but the difference is college is not just for hooking up. People also find love. Like I have but hooking up is more towards to people who go out and party a lot.

3.The difference is Labor of Love is about more of my parents generation.

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This show is really unrealistic because they have people who looks like models and the point of the show is to resist sex. Sex is like a drug to them, they urge the feeling. They constantly need to have sex to be in a relationship. knowing that it's just more than that.

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A double standard regarding relationship /sex/dating is men can have multiple partners and he would be praised for it and for women its frowned upon on and women will get degraded.

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T/F  There were more hookups in previous generations than this generation now?

T/F Most college women do the hookups more often then men who is in college.

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1. my initial reaction to this podcast was one I feel is likely shared by many of my classmates. That being said, was not surprised by what they were saying, but I also found it disheartening. Especially the young woman who talked about talked about not wanting to be used versus no one wanting to use you, and its something that I connected to.
2. I personally don't find this to be that different than what I have experienced. In the way it is discussed, specifically as a type of ritual of status, it does feel disconnected from a personal experience, however after reflecting on it, it is reminiscent of the ways i would hear others interact and how my friends and I would interact while in settings like frat parties.
3. I think a big similarity across the time periods in the book and today in this podcast is the fact that relationships, and specifically their individual versions of "hook up culture" vary with the norms of the time. I will also say, that a similarity within this podcast and history, is the lack of inclusion of LGBTQ persons in the grander context.

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I think this is realistic in it premise, because I personally think it should be easy to resist sexual temptation, especially for money. While it may not feel realistic, however, when I watched the show in its entirety, these people and their reasons and different attractions made sense. It is just not an outlook I can personally relate to, despite finding it very entertaining television.

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Summary
The Ted Talk discuss how gender plays a role in hook up culture. it looks at offers reasons through studies with young men and women, as well as bisexual women,  as to explain the reason behind someone does or does not decide to hook up with someone else. the findings support that there is now difference in men or women's willingness to hook up, but it is attributed to gendered social stereotypes that exist in these cultures. The book focuses on the specific stereotypes that get labeled to women that can occur due to hook up culture. It spends a lot of time discussing slut shaming and its negative affect on women who experience it. additionally the chapter looked at hop these stereotypes that either come as a result of past hook ups, or just the intensity of of the social stigma, bleed into relationships, and how couples can be affected both internally between the partners and externally between the partnership and social circles.
Comparison
I found the topics discussed in the book ad video to be very similar. both looking at college age interactions with sex and intimate relationships. However, while the board topic is very similar, they do differ in the focus of their analysis. For instance, the ted talk approaches the topic and discusses it in very gendered terms, and how gender play a substantial role in the development and maintaining of these types of standards. This is seen when they discuss reasons why women don't want to sleep with men wen they call us sluts for doing so and don't care if we get off. The book however is more grounded in looking specifically at the stereotypes that are attributed to women in they types of college hook up culture. All in all, they are a nice compliment of each other's topics when discussing hook-up culture.
Reflection
After reviewing the ted talk and chapter, I am left with much of the same feelings I had prior. Much of what was discussed was something I was already ware of in some capacity, and was further developed. Because of this, it mostly just contributed to the opinions I have. That being that the double standards I have both experienced and witnessed are, for lack of a better word, bull shit. But are definitely accurate and aligned with what is discussed in the both the chapter and video.

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A double standard I have experienced first hand was my father's treatment of my sister and I when we started dating compared to when my brother did the same. My father, before my sister and I called him on it, was much more controlling and intrusive about who we were seeing compared to brother, going as far as to send one of my siblings on a date with me when I was a freshman high school. My brother however was just patted on the back and rarely questioned when dating. My father has gotten better however he still holds that protectiveness due to an embedded double standard that there should be more concern over dating. I will say however, that there was never a double standard regarding who we were dating, as my sister is a lesbian, and my father was equally skeptical of  my partners as hers.

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T/F: "Hooking Up" has been clearly defined throughout the decades.

T/F: Gender roles are engrained in the double standards found in relationships.

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Video & Reading Synopsis

The video explains how having sex is not as, “bad,” as people make it seem to be. The stigma and stereotypes around sex are so negative and almost intrusive on one’s life that we are taught to just avoid it at all costs. The reading this week focuses on how sex was changed in the era of the beginning of Playboy as more of an activity for men. With this ideology, women at the time were being convinced more to be more free and give themselves more credit for their life and work. I think this is when the double standard was coined. Ironically, when women were trying to revolutionize their sexuality it seems like the double standard was set in place.

Take-Away on Casual Sex

I think casual sex is something that is normal for whoever wants to join it. I would never say that everyone should participate in casual sex or that it is the right thing to do (because everyone is different). However, if someone would enjoy casual sex and do it to their own comfort and desires I think it is okay.

Double-Standards

When it comes to double standards, I have so many first-hand experiences with this. (I guess I am attracted to ego-macho men). In all seriousness, the double standard amongst men and women definitely exists. I think in each situation it differs. I think that, like in the reading of chapter 6, men has this ideology to be MEN and then have this ideology that women should be just that: WOMEN. I think the double standard comes from our gender roles and expectations that have been set in place for generations. The man chooses his woman for marriage. Simple as that. You don’t see nearly as many women choosing their men for marriage. It’s almost like women are expected to serve the man properly to his expectation to win him over for lifelong monogamy and commitment (if you’re lucky enough to get even that at the bare minimum).

Relatable Double-Standards

I find it interesting that Playboy could come out with all of this material objectifying women and turning sex into something as casual and smoking a cigarette for men. If men were to display emotion they were considered less masculine. The same applies in the hook up culture today. Although, I believe the double standard exists in both men and women. I think there are times where a man wants to find an emotional connection with a woman but she has been exposed to the objectifying of people for sex. I think that now both men and women use each other for sex. I think they both see sex as casual if they would like to.

Stagnant Double-Standards

What hasn’t changed is the double standard on slut shaming. A man can sleep with an entire sorority and be seen as Godly but if a woman sleeps with an entire fraternity, she’s disgusting. Huh??? So the woman is now damaged goods but the man is not? I totally do not understand this ideology. I see it having no difference for men or women and their actions.

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T/F The Feminine Mystique was a book written by a housewife desiring her sense of entrapment and discontentment as a full time house wife in the 1940s.

T/F Playboy promised not only freed men from the constraints of marriage or monogamy but turning women into consumer objects freeing men from having feelings towards a woman he slept with.

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I thought both pieces provided useful information on casual sex and the societal perception of it. Chapter 6 of “Hooking Up: Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus” and the video on casual sex both discuss the double standards between men and women surrounding casual sex, but they do focus on separate aspects beyond the major topic.

Chapter 6 focused on how college students in particular think about “hooking up” and the expectations surrounding it. The text adheres to the narrative that women want something different out of hook ups and hope to form long-term relationships and only few wanting casual sexual encounters. They state that women would prefer to have that instead of being considered a prude. It did bring up the fact that this might be because women are considered sluts by their peers if they participated to freely in this new “script” for relationships.

The video on the other hand brings up some very good points about how women do what to have casual sexual relations, but they are unlikely to have good experiences because the men that more readily participate in hook ups are less likely to care if the women enjoy themselves and the men are more likely to consider the women a slut after. It brought of a very important point that the feelings, and double standard come down to societal distaste of sexually free people that is unwarranted.

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1) My initial reaction was that i was not surprised by what was said because I was aware of how the  hookups culture is in college.

2) I believe what they said in the podcast is similar to real life. I say this because I don't think there there are too many differences that would differentiate them. But the minor differences i noticed are for instance, not everyone is obsessed to sex, which is what the podcast makes you want to believe.

3) In "Labor of Love", the difference is that it is heavily focused on a specific time period and what dating and hooking up was. But when speaking about their experiences, the podcast seems to be more relevant to the hookup culture right now.

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T/F : Men are willing to wait longer to get married than women

T/F: The 1920 movement aimed to encourage women to embrace their sexuality.

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1. My initial reaction was that for the most part, I thought it was realistic. Parties are a big part of college and hook up culture is very common among our age group.
2. The video hits the main points, I cannot think of too many differences in real life.
3. The difference between Labor of Love is more of the older generation.

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1. I agree with what they are saying, hookup culture is very common and I witness a lot of it here at college.

2.Differences i've seen is that I have witnessed many long relationships in college and hook-up culture has not ruined it. Many people come into college with these relationships and hold them throughout college.

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This show could happen in real life. When some people drink, they want to have sex with people that they were with. It adds to the scenario when the two people have sexual tension.

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This show is unrealistic. mixing good looking people together with alcohol on an island seems impossible for people to resist sex.

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Chapter 6: Men, Women and the Sexual Double Standard
This chapter was incredibly informative and intuitive on many of the ideals I had already understood. I enjoyed how the author, Kathleen A. Bogle, describes and defines double standards across time periods and time trends. She talks about the 1950s and beyond, how Hollywood and social media impacts these norms and standards.

Casual Sex and Interview
One aspect I enjoyed was her interview with Lisa, a sophomore at a State University, which provided a relability regarding norms. This was able to answer the questions in how her responses only reiterated my personal reasons. However, my freshman year ideals differ from hers. My focus was primarily on education and my fear of missing out led to many false ideals of hooking up. As for the video, which is a much more modern view of standards, was very helpful in understanding the casualties of sex and sex at a young age.

Reflection
Both of these sources confirmed the ideals and thoughts I already had about casual sex and double standards. However, it provided a much more scientific and backed up report on all those thoughts I had. An aspect that changed is how I the man’s perspective on these issues. However, I do wish that both sources talked or touched upon the LGBTQIA+ community more to accurately represent the population.

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They both talk about hook up culture. During the video, Terri Conley talks about women are  perceived in a hookup. Women are definitely judged more.
Chapter 6 discusses the hookup culture in college. Women are slut shamed and judged heavily based on what they choose to do. Within both chapter 6 and the Ted Talk it talks about the gender stereotypes and how sex is stigmatized based on gender.

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T/F hookup culture ruined college relationships

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Men who hook up with lots of women are not typically judged. But, when a women has many sexual partners she is judged and stereotyped as a "slut."

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T/F:  Men have more sexual partners than women do.

T/F: The older generation has more sex than our generation.

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1)My initial reaction to this podcast was that some of the things mentioned could be a part someone's college experience, but not the experience of all college students. Unfortunately, podcasts like this one may lead some people to believe that the main past time of college students is hooking up for sex.

2) In my opinion, the difference between the podcast and what life is actually like on a college campus is that a the majority of the college students I know are not going to college just for hooking up and having sex.

3) One difference between the podcast and "Labor of Love" is the difference of communication between the two generations. The styles of asking someone out on a date seems to change generation to generation.

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While watching this, I feel like these types of “shows” really showcase sensationalism for T.V.  and do not demonstrate very realistic behavior. I just don’t really believe that there are groups who would create this type of relationship so quickly and have realistic expectations for real love and a serious committed relationship.

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T/F: The term “Hooking Up” has a lot of meanings.

T/F:  A women can have the same sexual desires as a man can.

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The difference between the video and chapter 6 is that In the video, Terri Conley mainly talks about the myths of sexual relationships and the relationship among men and women. As for chapter 6, the authors talks more so about the double standards of men and women as well as the college hookup culture. in both resources the main topics are about information of the hookup culture and how each individual are perceived to be in certain sexual situations.

Something I already knew about the double standards and casual sex before the reading is that females are portrayed as "sluts" for hooking up with several guys and not the other way around. Men believe it is okay to sleep with as much as female as they want, but it is not ok for things to be the other way around. Also, that guys strongly dislike when females ask them "what are we' after having intimate moments and sexual relationships. It definitely affects the females more than the guy because most likely the females would want something out of it more than just a hookup.

From hearing my friends experiences, this is pretty much accurate between how guys and girls take the hookup situation differently. However, each of my friends situations are different and it is not the same for all of them. There are times where my girl friend do want a relationship and other's don't after sexual relationships with a guy.

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I believe a double standard would be labeling a woman who has sex with a lot of different men, when she is single, as  "loose". Meanwhile, if a guy has sex with a lot of  different women, when he is single, then he is not labeled  and just thought of as "being a guy".

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my initial reaction to this podcast is that I agree, I have seen friends do this is college and most of the things said in the podcast can relate to some of the things they are doing. It's not really true that college is just meant to hook up with people, in my opinion I feel like there are more people in relationships.

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I do not think this attitude is realistic because it does not make sense for someone to want to be intimate and hook up with them the first time they meet someone. Personally, I have watched this show and I think the focus on this show is just everything for content since everything is kind of materialistic. Even though the contestants are looking for connections, it seems a bit dramatized.

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My initial reaction to this podcast was that I agree 100%. To be perfectly honest with you, I never expect anything less than what was spoken about. The way they spoke about it, made me realize that every college student goes through the same thing as my friends and I in college. It seems extreme and wrong but it is almost exactly how I feel about the college hookup culture.

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As much as we all want to think their reactions are real, I believe that they are not realistic at all. This is just a TV show and these people are getting payed to do everything they say, though the show might give the appearance that it could be real, its just "actors" doing their jobs.

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In my opinion, I do not think this attitude is realistic whatsoever. I watched the show and of course its entertaining to watch but it is such an impractical show. You put a bunch of young adults together and give them rules they're required to follow. The girls on the show are all very stuck-up and fake and the guys always just ended up looking like pigs and its just a very unrealistic way to find people to love.

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After watching the video and reading chapter 6, Bothe the video and in the book talk about the hook up culture, more specifically towards women.In the video the speaker talks about how women are judged more than men in the hook up culture. The book basically states the same thing how women are shamed for acting slutty when they "hook up".  The video talks about women in general and in the book its just base on colleges girls.

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Main points in videos were myths of sexual relationships that Terri was able to debunk. First one was why women avoid heterosexual sex. She says that women don't receive pleasure and or even feel valued. Second myth was that monogamous is the best. She debunks this myth as well and says that through research that she has done, there wasn't anything proven that showed that it is the best or better.

In chapter 6, the author focuses on double standards and hookup culture in college. The author also discussed the experiences men and women go through when they have sexual encounter as well. The chapter also expanded on sex and gender stereotypes.

Seeing how acquaintances around me handle certain situation, a lot of what was said about hookup culture and double standards are true. So overall, I just wasn't surprised because i have witnessed and was told things by people. Also because it is very common for most people to go through these situations as well.

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One double standard that I hate is that men are praised for having multiple partners when it comes to having sex and or just dating. But when it comes to girls, we are looked down and called names for it.

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there are many double standards while dating. a lot of people like to claim that chivalry is dead because men aren't the way they used to be, but nothing is the way it used to be. with the hookup culture being so popular it changes the way a lot of us look at the way love and relationships are now. paying for meals, opening doors, etc.

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A double standard that I honestly hate is that the man should be the one asking the girl out first. At this point in life if I like someone I'm going to tell them, there's nothing to loose, there's more people in the world, and if what I'm looking is for someone to spend the rest of my life with, sometimes I'm going to be the one making the first move because I feel like sometimes man think they have all this power (not every man just some I that I've dealt with)  or maybe man can be shy (or a little slow, not really knowing how a relationship works) as well.

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T/F: are hookups more popular now?
T/F: are women being called "sluts" for wanting to hookup"

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T/F: Our generation is having less sex compared to other generations?

T/F: There are more college hookups now, than ever before?

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In the video Social psychologist and sex researcher Terri Conley interrogates three common myths about sexuality and gender. She starts off by discussing why women avoid heterosexual sex. And debunks the myth that it is because their brain works differently or because of biological reasons. She mentions statistics that show that women are more stigmatized, and less likely to obtain pleasure as their opinions aren't valued during sex. Considering these facts, it is understandable why they would want to avoid heterosexual sex. That said, myth #2 she debunks is that monogamous is best. Through recent research she demonstrates that there isn't anything specifically better about monogamous relationship compared to consensually non-monogamous relationships. They are both just as likely to get cheated on and don't experience any more of a special bond that would make the relationship better. If anything research shows that people who engage in consensually non-monogamous relationships are more likely to take precautions against STI if they do end up cheating. Compared to those who cheat of their monogamous relationship. So as a person in a monogamous relationship your more likely to contract and STI. The last myth Terri debunks it that sex should be avoided being that it is extremely dangerous. She expands that many people believe you have very high chances of dying from sex as you can easily contract an STI. However she points out that you are 17 times more likely to die from driving than from having sex.

Chapter 6 expands on men, women and the sexual double standard that they may face. It details that women are more stigmatized than men in regards to sex. And because of this they also take on more of an emotional burden. As they must take on more critics which could affect that way they evaluate their own behavior by the standards of their peers.

To conclude, there are many things that I expected to be common myths. Like the fact that women are more likely to avoid heterosexual sex because of the stakes in line. Many women may just not find it worth it as they are more likely to see themselves suffer. Also I expected that people hold monogamous relationships to be better and more right. As I often hear that there are more benefits and that the relationships is stronger. However the statistics that Terri provided definitely proved this believe wrong. Terri's break down of this myth has left me questioning my stand on many things in regards to sex, dating, and relationships. When it comes to monogamous relationships I always hear that it is very risky and that you can easily contract an STI. I was surprised to see that this isn't true are all. In fact, statistics shows the complete opposite.

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My initial reaction was that there was slight truth to this podcast in some sense. For instance, I’ve known plenty of girls through high school that only wanted to get with someone simply because other people wanted him/her.
One difference I can see in this is that it is not always true that women are the ones who tend to sleep with men they don’t like and don’t have sex with men they do. I’ve had plenty of times where a guy that I considered my best friend would never even give me a chance because he didn’t like me like me. The difference is that this is more relevant and brought to by college students who share personal experiences.

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This is not realistic at all because I know that 99% of this is staged and scripted. These kinds of shows annoy me because it doesn’t involve any type of love.

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There was definitely a double standard with me and this one gentleman who well call Ryan (not his name) and we were casually hooking up. However he didn’t like it if I made plans with another guy even if we were not together or official/exclusive. But he was allowed to talk to other women. It was offensive and unfair and simply unhealthy which is why I ended our “relationship” ASAP.

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Explain and provide and example of a “double-standard” situation.