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You meet your mentee Danielle, get along great and agree to catch up once a month until May. Danielle has come to meetings, but each time had not completed the activities you assigned as “homework”. Nowadays Danielle is slow to respond to your e-mails and hard to contact. Another meeting has not been arranged.

You feel that your time is being wasted because your mentee is not showing commitment to the programme.

-       How would you approach this situation?

-       What needs to be considered?

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Advice from the MU Team if you encounter "Danielle"

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Advice from the MU Team if you encounter "Danielle"

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E-mail to acknowledge the fact that meetings are continually postponed, and ask the mentee what they feel is contributing to this -and then question/address appropriately, bearing in mind any possible self-limiting beliefs

Consider whether the mentee has any additional responsibilities beyond their student role (part – time work / caring responsibilities etc.)

If Danielle comes to you and highlights she is struggling with her time management skills or is just feeling quite overwhelmed, refer her to MILO Time Management, or Stress and Relaxation Strategies courses

If you never hear back from Danielle: Danielle could be overwhelmed with college and/or things going on at home, and doesn't quite know how to end a mentorship that they aren’t prepared for. If Daniele has made you wait long enough, we encourage you reach out suggesting each a “pause” to the mentor relationship or a “stop”. cc or reach out to alumnimentoring@mu.ie  in this communication or to discuss.

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You have met your mentee Joanne, and straight away realise you both have very different personalities. While Joanne attends every meeting and completes the tasks assigned to her, she doesn’t seem very engaged when we meet face to face. Joanne gives vague responses to questions and can sometimes look bored or be very quiet. You are not quite sure how to support her when you can’t talk openly and discuss things in the meetings.

-       How would you approach this situation?

-       What needs to be considered?

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Advice from the MU Alumni Mentoring Team if you encounter "Joanne"

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Advice from the MU Alumni Mentoring Team if you encounter "Joanne"

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·         Has the mentee identified their goals and how they want to use the meeting time? The mentor may need to ask the mentee how they can support them.

·         An agreement needs to be written up as well as the mentee identifying and writing down their goals at the first meeting, so that the mentor (and the mentee) can refer back to these when meetings become stilted.

·         OPEN questions you could ask:

o   Do you know why you are at this meeting?

o   What would you like to achieve from this meeting?

o   What do you understand about mentoring

o   What would you like to talk about?

o   What do you think is the purpose of these meetings?

o   You seem reluctant to discuss this. Is there a problem with talking about it?

o   How can these meetings be useful for you?

o   How do you think the mentoring can help you?

o   While we have these meetings, what would you like to work on [in your professional development]?

o   What is the best way to make the most of these meetings for you?

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John is in his final year at Maynooth University. He is due to graduate in May and is very excited to start working in a large multinational organisation. However, he has confided in you that he is worried about entering the world of work. He is the first in his family to graduate from University and feels he won’t “fit” in.

-      How would you approach this situation?

-      How can we help John move forward?

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Advice from the MU Team if you encounter "John"

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Advice from the MU Team if you encounter "John"

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Provide him with insight into the world of work

Ask him why he feels he won’t fit

Help him to start building his confidence and realise that he has earned a place on the programme – a SWOT Analysis tool can be helpful

Consider signposting him to FORAGE, MU’s Virtual Work Experience platform that is free for students to help him get good insight into the world of work

Reiterate how imposter syndrome is normal

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You have been matched with Alex who is worried about life after University. Alex is unsure where their degree can take them. In an attempt to get experience, Alex has applied to summer internships but has been unsuccessful. Alex is starting to get extremely frustrated with the situation and doesn’t know what to do or how to get hired. Overall Alex is feeling a bit hopeless.

-       How do you manage the student’s frustration?

-       What needs to be considered?

-       How do you help the student move forward?

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Advice from the MU Alumni Mentoring Team if you encounter "Alex"

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Advice from the MU Alumni Mentoring Team if you encounter "Alex"

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Managing their frustration: The most important thing you can do is to simply listen. You can show you are listening by reflecting back what you are hearing; this will allow your mentee to continue to expand on their feelings while feeling heard.

Sample questions: What is preventing you from achieving your goals? ●What are some areas for improvement that you wish to develop? ●What will you do differently to meet those challenges? ●How can I help? Where do you feel you need the most help

Helping the student explore their options: Ask them if they work part time, what they like about that, what they don’t like about that. Set them a task of looking up graduate profiles on Prospects or GradIreland and jotting down what interests them about each of them.

Helping the student with their CV: Try not to feel like it is your responsibility to solve the mentee’s problems and get them experience in your organisation. Explain how experiences on your CV are not just work experiences. It’s all about transferable skills that can be gained from a wide variety of opportunities (volunteering / clubs and socs)

Work with them, and empower them to see their skillset.

There are sample SKILLS Audit and SWOT Analysis exercises on their Online Workbook they could work through to identify gaps.

Students have free access to a CV review tool called CareerSet that they can use before sharing it with you. They also have free access to Forage, a virtual work experience platform if they have experience gaps on their CV.

Signpost to the Careers and Employability Service for 1:1 Guidance and Advice also.