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This series of short videos was created to help explain self-regulation concepts to students in Grades 7–12. The videos work in conjunction with the secondary curriculum available here. After watching each 2–3-minute video, discuss the concepts with your students.

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Adapted from "Focusing on Effort With Students," Peachy Speechie

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Contact Us Meetings Calendar Courses Program Managers Resources & Documents Safe Sleep Training Information The CDD ECLN Home Visiting Consultant project has developed ...

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Teaching Your Child to Self-Regulate [Secondary]

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Teaching Your Child to Self-Regulate [Intermediate]

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Teaching Your Child to Self-Regulate [Primary]

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College and Career Competency Sequence: Self-Regulation

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College and Career Competency Sequence: Self-Regulation

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Learn To Relieve Anxiety | Guided Meditation For Kids

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Learn To Relieve Anxiety | Guided Meditation For Kids

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Learn To Relieve Anxiety | Guided Meditation For Kids | Breathing Exercises | GoNoodle

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The College and Career Competency Framework, developed by Drs. Gaumer Erickson and Noonan, supports educators in systematically embedding intrapersonal, interpersonal, and cognitive competencies into course content.

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Elementary Self-Regulation Videos

This series of short videos was created to help explain self-regulation concepts to students in grades K-6. The videos work in conjunction with the elementary curriculum available here. After watching each 2-3-minute video, discuss the concepts with your students.

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Elementary Self-Regulation Videos This series of short videos was created to help explain self-regulation concepts to students in grades K-6. The videos work in conjunction with the elementary curriculum available here. After watching each 2-3-minute video, discuss the concepts with your students.

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Using Planners to Support Self-Regulation

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Using Planners to Support Self-Regulation

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Executive Function, ADHD, 2e. Seth Perler

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📅 🧠 How to customize a planner, even if you hate planners, Executive Function, ADHD Tip

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Learning to use a planner EFFECTIVELY requires a LOT of Executive Functioning skills! Here is a breakdown of a coaching session I did with a student who has resisted using a planner for a couple months. I'll explain how we customized her planner system so you can use these ideas as a springboard to customize your own.

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Check it out on my blog: https://sethperler.com/students-reflect-semester/ Do you want a world where education gives ALL kids, including outside-the-box learners, the tools to truly write their own scripts in life? Education should empower learners to not only have great lives, but also to contribute in personally meaningful ways. Let's do this right.

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Teaching Self-Regulation in Secondary Classrooms

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Teaching Self-Regulation in Secondary Classrooms

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Lesson sets contain 25 instructional activities with companion student workbooks.

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Teaching Self-Regulation in Primary & Intermediate Classrooms

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Teaching Self-Regulation in Primary & Intermediate Classrooms

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Lesson sets contain 25 instructional activities with companion student workbooks.

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Self-Regulation Student Videos

This series of seven videos was created to help explain self-regulation concepts to students in grades 7-12. The videos work in conjunction with the middle and high school curriculum available here. After each 2-3-minute video, discuss the concepts with your students.

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Self-Regulation Student Videos This series of seven videos was created to help explain self-regulation concepts to students in grades 7-12. The videos work in conjunction with the middle and high school curriculum available here. After each 2-3-minute video, discuss the concepts with your students.

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Things I Can Control and Things I Can't Control

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Things I Can Control and Things I Can't Control

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Research Guide (Grades PreK–6): Self-Regulation

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Research Guide (Grades PreK–6): Self-Regulation

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Research Guide (Grades 7–12): Self-Regulation

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Research Guide (Grades 7–12): Self-Regulation

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Written and illustrated by a 2nd-grade class, this story explores self-regulation strategies for managing emotions

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Self-Regulating Your Work (Adapted for Remote Learning)

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Self-Regulating Your Work (Adapted for Remote Learning)

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Games and Activities to Teach Self-Regulation

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Games and Activities to Teach Self-Regulation

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How can you support the development of self-regulation in your child? Check out some of our best activities and ideas here!
*This post contains affiliate links. Read more.
What is Self-Regulation?

When we talk about self-regulation in kids, we're referring to the ability to maintain an arousal level that is appropriate for any given situation. Self-regulation also involves having the ability to generate appropriate behavioral and sensory responses to the input in different situations and daily routines and the ability to demonstrate self control: to monitor and control behavior, attention, motor output, emotions, and social interactions.

Self-regulation skills might include a child maintaining his composure and problem-solving or asking a caregiver for help or guidance when another child takes his toy or being able to self-monitor, control their impulses, and keep their voice quiet in the library. Self regulation in the classroom or school might include a child being able to attend and stay at his desk while the classroom teacher is talking or being able to stay with his class and walk in line in the hallway.

It sounds like a lot, doesn't it? That's because self-regulation is extremely complex. It involves cognition, the sensory systems, behavior...and so much more! Many children struggle with one or more of these areas, making self-regulation challenging. Children who are autistic, who have ADHD, or who need more sensory processing supports may struggle with self-regulation skills more than other kids. Toddlers and kids in the preschool years are still actively developing the ability to regulate themselves and may demonstrate outbursts and tantrums as part of typical development. But all of us - adults and children alike - can have difficulty with managing our own emotions and behaviors when faced with basic daily stressors like tiredness or hunger.

The Self-Regulation Handbook

Here at The Inspired Treehouse, we're so passionate about the topic of Self-Regulation that we finally decided to write a book about it! The Self-Regulation Handbook is an ebook that's packed with tools, activities, strategies, and information that are perfect for supporting self-regulation in kids at home, in the classroom, or during therapy sessions. Click here to learn more!

How Can You Tell if Your Child is Struggling With Self-Regulation?

Recognizing when kids have self-regulation concerns involves recognizing different patterns of behavior. Kids who are having difficulty with self-regulation may:

-Act overly silly or "out of control"

-Have tantrums or meltdowns

-Struggle with transitions between activities

-Have difficulty waiting or taking turns

-Struggle with being in close proximity to others (e.g. circle time)

-Demonstrate problems and frustration during social interactions (e.g. talking too loud, standing too close, touching others)

-Have difficulty walking or waiting in line

-Move too quickly or with too much force

-Grab or touch objects impulsively

How to Help Kids Develop Self-Regulation

Even though self-regulation can be a challenging skill for many children, research has shown that games and fun activities can be effective in promoting better self-regulation and for children who are struggling.

It is also so important for kids to have caregivers who are able to maintain perspective, coach them through difficult situations, demonstrate empathy when kids are struggling with self-regulation, and form responsive relationships that foster kids' self-regulation capacities and self-esteem.

Games and therapy tools that support planning and problem solving, patience, memory, attention, motor control, and sequencing can help kids develop the ability to self-regulate despite challenging situations and circumstances. Calming techniques, self-awareness exercises, and mindfulness activities can also be effective in supporting the development of self-regulation.

The following 30 games and activities can be great ways to introduce self regulation strategies with kids!

Games and Activities for Self-Regulation

The following 30 games and activities can be great ways to introduce and practice self-regulation skills with kids and can even be used as self-regulation interventions during therapy sessions. Click on the linked titles for more information!

1 || Red Light, Green Light

Spice it up with these fun light buzzers! And be sure to check out our post about variations on this classic game to promote self control in kids!

2 || Simon Says

Try this Simon Says parachute game for a different twist on this old classic.

This fun obstacle course for kids is a great way to encourage teamwork and social skills while also working on gross motor skills like balance and coordination!

4 || Duck Duck Goose

A great old classic for working on social interactions, waiting, and more!

5 || Freeze tag

This is an awesome one for working on self-regulation because kids have to wait perfectly still until their friends come to "unfreeze" them.

Cooperative art activities for kids like Partner Painting are perfect for getting little ones to work together while also targeting visual motor and fine motor skills.

7 || Hide and seek

Can kids wait quietly in their hiding spots while their friends try to find them?

Group games for kids like Wacky Relay are a great way to focus on social skills, teamwork, and gross motor skills!

Freeze Dance is so perfect to use in the classroom or at home to practice regulating movements and behavior.

10 || Musical Chairs

We love this idea for working with kids on coping when it's their turn to be "out". It can be a big challenge, but a good way to practice.

The Mirror Mirror game can be as simple, or as challenging as you make it and is a super fun way to address controlled movements and attention.

Working together on controlling the parachute to play different games is awesome for working on self-regulation. Grab our favorite parachute here!

13 || "Counting Down" or Anticipation Activities

Try setting out a beanbag chair and helping the child wait by counting down - "3...2...1...JUMP!" and then jumping onto the bean bag chair. And then repeating the activity so the child knows to wait before jumping)

Bilateral coordination, memory and cognitive skills, and cooperative play are all packed into these fun hand clapping songs and games - and they'll also take you for a little stroll down memory lane!

Hedbanz is another fun game for working on self-regulation because kids have to resist the urge to yell out the picture on their friends' headbands!

16 || Dancing

Kids love practicing their favorite fast and slow dance moves to different types of music - great for regulating speed of movements.

Suspend game is a great fine motor challenge and also challenges kids to regulate the force of their movements.

18 || Balloon volleyball

When kids play balloon volleyball, they have to learn how to slow their movements down in order to control the balloon and not let it go flying!

Slow, careful movements are the name of the game in Jenga and you can modify the blocks to include fun questions and other prompts to boost social interaction.

We like the simple game of Operation for working with kids on coping with turn taking when they hit the buzzer on the pretend patient.

Simon is great way to work on visual attention and memory, this old game is a great one for your classroom or therapy bag.

22 || Sequencing Motor Tasks

For example - do 3 jumps, then 2 hops, then stand on one foot for 3 seconds)

Like Simon, Bop It is great for working on memory, but also includes an auditory processing challenge and an opportunity to learn how to remain calm when kids make a mistake.

Spot It is a perfect game for addressing visual processing skills and also offers kids a chance to cope with "losing" because the rounds go fairly quickly so they can get back "in the game".

These calming deep breathing techniques for kids are great strategies for supporting self-regulation and calm behavior at home, in the classroom, and beyond! Grab the free printable breathing cards too!

These 10 meditation resources are the perfect place to start if you want to try mindfulness activities and guided meditation for kids!

Mindful movement and mindful breathing are a great combination for supporting self-regulation. Try some yoga for kids in your classroom or during your next therapy session!

One of the most popular curriculums on the market for working on self-regulation, Zones of Regulation offers visual supports and practical activities for working on the skills kids need most to regulate themselves.

You'll want these calming techniques in your toolbox for addressing behaviors in the classroom setting.

And these awesome ideas are perfect for taking out into the community to practice self-regulation on the go!

Other Resources About Self-Regulation

1 || Developing Young Children's Self-Regulation Through Everyday Experiences, National Association for the Education of Young Children. Ida Rose Florez

2 || Self-Regulation: A Cornerstone of Early Childhood Development. Linda Groves Gillespie and Nancy L. Seibel. National Association for the Education of Young Children.

3 || Executive Function & Self-Regulation. Center on the Developing Child, Harvard University.

4 || How Can We Help Kids With Self-Regulation? Child Mind Institute.

5 || Strategies for Teaching Kids Self-Regulation. PBS.
6 || Self-Regulation Research: A Simple Overview
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How to Help Kids With Self-Regulation: 30 Games and Activities - The Inspired Treehouse

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How can you support the development of self-regulation in kids? This huge resource is full of self-regulation games, information, books, and more!

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Cookie Monster Talks About Self-Regulation

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Cookie Monster Talks About Self-Regulation

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Sesame Street's Cookie Monster Talks Self-Regulation

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As a classroom teacher I looked forward every year to teaching students all kinds of academic concepts and skills that would enable them to be engaged and successful in their learning. Organizing book clubs to get them thinking about themes and character traits, guiding research on how animals adapt to their environment, teaching the rock cycle or multiplication-I relished them all. And there was one other thing that I enjoyed teaching just as much: positive time-out.

Beyond Responding to Misbehavior

Many teachers know how to use time-out not as a form of punishment, but as a judgment-free, matter-of-fact way to respond to a student's misbehavior while maintaining the momentum of learning in the classroom. But what's even more powerful is that we can use time-out as part of our efforts to teach students to self- regulate-to recognize when they're getting frustrated or just losing focus, and to give themselves a break so they can regroup and return to productive learning.

It was Martin, a third grader I taught, who gave me the opportunity to learn how this strategy can be used for self-regulation. Martin was a happy but easily frustrated child. When confronted with a difficulty, his tension would quickly build into crying and yelling. At first I used time-out only as a response to his outbursts. Gradually, however, I figured out how to teach Martin to use these breaks himself to prevent outbursts.

Through that experience, I learned these key steps for guiding children toward developing self-regulation skills.

Introduce Time-Out as an Aid

I carefully presented time-out as something that can help anyone stay calm and focused. I introduced it after establishing class rules with students and discussing the rules in a way that gained their investment. I then told them that everyone forgets or has trouble following the rules sometimes, and in this classroom, when that happened to someone I would help them out in several ways, including using words or a nonverbal cue to remind them, having them come sit next to me-or having them step away from the action to pull themselves together.

I then modeled so students were certain what going to the break area, staying there, and returning should look and sound like. All this helped establish that taking a break was not a punishment and paved the way for students to use it themselves as an aid to maintaining positive behavior. (To learn more about teaching positive time-out, see " What is Responsive Classroom Time-Out" and Rules in School.)

Act Before Frustration Builds

When I first started using this technique, I tended to wait until a child was clearly out of control. Over time, I learned instead to have a child take a break at the first sign of tension. For example, one day while conferring with students during math workshop, I looked up to check how Martin was doing with his multiplication problems. It was clear that he was getting frustrated because his brow was furrowed, his pencil was tossed off to the side, and he was staring hard at the math problems while sighing loudly. For some children these might just be signs that they're working through something they're stuck on and not necessarily reason to intervene. But I knew Martin well enough to recognize that for him, these were sure signs of an outburst about to happen. I calmly walked over to Martin and told him to take a break.

The advantage of directing a child to take a break early like this, before the furrowed brow grows into yelling and a red face streaming with tears, is that the child usually recovers faster and is spared the unsettling feeling of having had an outburst in front of everyone in the class. More importantly, it shows the child how effective taking a break can be, which encourages them to choose that option themselves in other frustrating situations.

Observe Children Carefully

Of course, to know when a child could use a break means we need to learn what tends to trigger their tension and to recognize their signs of frustration, and that requires careful observation.

For example, after watching Martin closely for a few days I saw that certain things quickly frustrated him: difficult math problems, being unable to do something the first time he tried, and feeling that his classmates weren't hearing him. As for his signs of tension, besides the wrinkled brow, cast-aside pencil, and hard stare, there were the clenched fists and the color in his face slowly becoming deepening shades of scarlet.

For other children, the triggers could be too much noise or too much sitting, feeling bored or feeling hungry, and signs of tension could be anything from hard frowning to frenetic pencil tapping. Every child is different, so the key is to observe carefully and look for patterns.

Teach Children to Give Themselves a Break

To learn to voluntarily take breaks, children need to recognize when they're getting upset or starting to lose focus. We can help them. The day that I told Martin to take a break during math workshop, as the class settled into reading time after recess, I checked in with Martin privately to explain what I had noticed and why I thought he needed a break. I shared with him what his frustration signs looked like to me and asked if he had noticed the same thing. The whole conversation took less than a minute.

Like some children, Martin did not initially recognize his triggers or his signs of frustration. Over time, with reflective conversation, I helped him become aware of his triggers and connect his feelings to his observable signs. As Martin became more self-aware in this way, we were able to rehearse taking a break. During an afternoon workshop time, when Martin tended to be calm, we'd pretend he was noticing his signs of frustration and he'd walk over to the break area to calm down. These rehearsals took just a couple of minutes and were critical to his eventual ability to self-regulate in real moments of frustration.

Other children may already be aware of how they exhibit their emotions. Even so, they may still need help understanding that when they notice their signs of tension, it's time to take a break. Sometimes it's enough to hold occasional whole-class discussions about this. Other times teachers need to practice one-on-one with individual students as I did with Martin.

Teach a Calming Strategy to Use While Taking a Break

Although Martin began taking breaks when he got frustrated, he was slow to calm down and sometimes would still turn bright red and burst into tears during the break. Clearly, if children like Martin are to get the full benefit of time-out, we need to teach them some calming strategies to use while there, such as deep breathing, doing wall push-ups, or visualizing a favorite place. Having a small basket of things on hand like stress balls for children to squeeze and puzzles that can take their minds off their frustration can also help.

With Martin, I named a few of these strategies and asked which he thought might work for him. He wanted to try deep breathing, something he'd tried before as a way to recover from his outbursts. I knew, however, that I'd have to scaffold this skill for him because his previous attempts to breathe deeply were actually quick shallow breaths taken while still persevering on what had initially fueled his frustration.

I suggested a strategy that the school psychologist had taught another student-blowing soap bubbles. But not just any bubbles. While taking a break, Martin was to blow the biggest bubble he could. This accomplished two things. One, it encouraged him to take long, deep breaths. Two, it turned his focus away from what was frustrating to the task of blowing the biggest possible bubble.

A final word about calming strategies: It's important to help students connect their use of a calming strategy to their regained feeling of calm so they'll see how the strategy helps. This can be as simple as saying, "I see that deep breathing helped you feel calm again" when they return from their break to their previous classroom activity.

When Self-Regulation Becomes a Habit

If we consistently and skillfully guide students to use time-out for self-regulation, we'll gradually see them put this tool to good use. Not only that, we may see them begin to apply the strategies to situations they face in the course of their day, without having to physically remove themselves to the break area.

One day while conferring with groups on their fractions work, I looked up to check on Martin. As he was talking to his classmates about the problem they were working on, his brow wrinkled-a sure sign of his frustration. I watched for a moment more to see what he would do next. He put up an index finger to signal his classmates to wait a moment. He then turned around, took a few deep breaths, turned back to his classmates-minus the scrunched brow-and continued conversing calmly with them. That's when I knew that helping Martin self-regulate his response to frustration was really working.
Tracy Mercier is a Responsive Classroom consultant. She has taught grades three, four, and five in diverse classrooms in Connecticut and Massachusetts.

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Time-Out & Teaching Self-Regulation | Responsive Classroom

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As a classroom teacher I looked forward every year to teaching students all kinds of academic concepts and skills that would enable them to be engaged and successful in their learning. Organizing book clubs to get them thinking about themes and character traits, guiding research on how animals adapt to their environment, teaching the rock cycle or multiplication-I relished them all.

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Self-control: Teaching Students About Their Greatest Inner Strength

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Self-control: Teaching Students About Their Greatest Inner Strength

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What is the key to health, wealth and success? Many students want to know. But educators sometimes sidestep or ignore these questions. We don't want to pigeonhole ourselves as self-help gurus. We focus on what we know. We doggedly pursue our teaching mission: Provide students with knowledge and experiences that will help make them well-rounded, informed and critically thinking adults.

How can students and educators have their cake and eat it, too? We can teach students about the scientific study of an inner strength that helps them lead healthy, productive and accomplished lives. We can teach them about self-control.

What is self-control?

Self-control is the capacity to override an impulse in order to respond appropriately. We use self-control when we eat carrots instead of Krispy Kreme donuts, when we forgive instead of freak out and when we pay attention instead of paying someone short shrift.

Self-control helps us manage motivational conflicts (Baumeister & Vohs, 2007). A motivational conflict is when motivations clash in ways that prevent action. People have many motivations, most of which benefit themselves and society. Our motivation to eat arises out a natural concern to ensure our own survival, whereas the motivation for sexual intercourse arises out of a natural concern to pass our genes to the next generation. Motivations to seek affiliation and to protect ourselves and loved ones from harm also offer examples of basic, fundamental motivations that promote individual and collective well-being.

Yet, self-control can prevent us from engaging in motivated behaviors. People have natural motivations to survive by eating, but they use self-control to resist their temptation to eat unhealthy foods (or not to eat at all). Natural motivations to reproduce through sexual intercourse must be overridden through the use of self-control in order to follow standards for appropriate sexual behavior. And motivations to harm transgressors are overridden through self-control because forgiving others fosters individual, social and cultural well-being.

Self-control has three main parts:

Monitoring involves keeping track of your thoughts, feelings and actions. In one study, first-year female college students who weighed themselves every day, compared with those who did not, were buffered from the typical weight gain that accompanies the first year in college (Levitsky et al., 2006). The same is true when it comes to our money. Keeping track of how much we save and spend relates to having more money.

Standards are guidelines that steer us toward desirable responses. Our standards originate from society and culture. Think of the speed limit sign that tells you how fast to drive or the laws that tell you to pay your taxes. Follow the rules, and you'll be fine. Break the rules, and there will be consequences. We also have personal standards that govern our behavior. If I have certain religious beliefs, I might think that it is inappropriate to eat certain foods, think certain thoughts or feel certain emotions.

Strength refers to the energy we need to control our impulses. Numerous factors affect our self-control strength, such as mental exhaustion and stress.

Effective self-control hinges on all three ingredients working together. Without monitoring, you know what you need to do and have the energy to do it, but you struggle to accomplish much because you do not keep track of your progress. A world without standards is a recipe for chaos. And chronically depleted self-control strength can leave people with the knowledge of what they should do without giving them the energy to do it. Like a three-legged stool, kick off one self-control ingredient and the odds are that your self-control will topple over.

Why should we study self-control?

It's easy to sound preachy when we teach students about self-control. They might think they're the only ones who struggle to get up in the morning, eat healthy foods or get enough exercise. I always tell them about one elegant study, which showed that people are not perfect when they try to control their impulses (Hofmann et al., 2012). They fail about 20 percent of the time. Self-control is difficult.

Self-control improves life in three ways:

Individual well-being .
Self-control relates to better health. Physically, self-controlled people sleep better, experience fewer physical sickness symptoms and live longer lives. They also enjoy better mental health. Self-control relates to lower anxiety and depression. Behaviors that relate to mental health problems, such as substance use and suicide, are less common among self-controlled people.

Relationships .
Beyond wealth or good looks, people want self-controlled relationship partners. We want to spend our lives with people we can trust, who follow through on their promises and who will override their impulse to leave or lash out when things get tough. Self-controlled people are forgiving and react to conflict with benevolence rather than violence.

Societies .
Self-control helps societies flourish. Self-controlled people, compared to their less-controlled counterparts, earn more money. Not only do self-controlled people enjoy greater wealth, they behave more generously. They override their selfish impulses and go out of their way to help others. On a broader level, societies that have clear-cut standards for appropriate behavior tend to function better than do societies in which people do as they please. Societies also benefit from monitoring how their citizens behave.

When I teach, I ask students to think of examples of how self-control influences individual, relationship and societal well-being. Working with a partner, they generate a list of real-world examples that demonstrate how high and low self-control can help and harm people, relationships and societies. The good news is that it is easy to improve self-control.

Isn't self-control the same as IQ?

Sometimes, it is hard to convince students that intelligence and self-control are not two sides of the same coin. They are related, but they aren't the same thing. But talk is cheap. Let's look at what the scientific data tell us.

In a glorious study, Angela Duckworth and Martin Seligman (2005) recruited a bunch of adolescent students at the beginning of the school year and asked them to complete measures of intelligence and self-control. Then Duckworth and Seligman waited... and waited... and waited some more. At the end of their patient waiting period, Duckworth and Seligman collected the students' grade point averages (GPA).

What did they find? Self-control was over twice as important as intelligence in predicting end-of-year GPA. That's right: Self-control outdid IQ 2-to-1 in predicting academic achievement.

This result breathes fresh air into students' lives. IQ often doesn't budge, but self-control does. If our students want to get better grades, they need to stop trying to boost their IQ. Their success depends on how hard they work, how much they persist in the face of failure and how well they overcome temptation.

Different flavors of self-control

Don't let students think that self-control is an amorphous blob of goodness. It has many forms and flavors. One influential model splits impulsivity (self-control's close sibling) into four distinct parts:

Urgency is when you act rashly when you feel upset. You might get drunk, engage in risky sexual behavior or slug your romantic partner. Urgency also has an optimistic twin: positive urgency - or the tendency to act impulsively when we feel good. Ever wonder why some people can't resist the urge to set a car ablaze when their team wins the Super Bowl? Or how a work promotion causes some people to visit a bar and do things they later regret? That's positive urgency.

(Lack of) Premeditation: Ready, shoot, aim - that's how people who score highly on this type of impulsivity navigate their environment. To act before we think is a clear path to fizzled goals.

(Lack of) Perseverance: The 1980s singer Billy Ocean said it best, "When the going gets tough, the tough get going." To illustrate, I tell students a story about one of my favorite lawyers.

Before he became a lawyer, he tried his hand at business. He failed. Forced to declare bankruptcy, he handed over his last two assets (one of which was a horse). Next, he tried his hand in politics. Wanting to start small, he campaigned to join his state's general assembly. He failed again. Sometime later, he set his sights on higher office: the U.S. Congress. His luck didn't change. Three failed attempts later, he switched his focus to the U.S. Senate. But he came up short again, losing two elections.

Two patterns capture students' attention. First, this guy appears to delight from failure. Over and over, he strives to achieve goals that his experience tells him he can't achieve. That's where most people stop. But I encourage students to focus on the second, and more important, part of the story: his perseverance. Beaten down by repeated financial and political failure, he kept at it. He remained laser-focused on achieving his goals and overrode his natural impulse to quit. He showed confidence that someday his efforts would pay off. He was right. He went on to become the 16th president of the United States, widely regarded as the greatest president of all time. His name was Abraham Lincoln.

Sensation-seeking : Ever feel driven to do things because they give you a buzz? We all do, but people high in sensation-seeking behave for the buzz more than others do. Some behaviors might have disastrous consequences, such as skydiving, base jumping or taking drugs. Other actions carry risk but immense rewards, such as risking one's life to explore space and land on the moon.

Four ways to improve self-control

Students enjoy learning practical strategies that they can use now. Here are four tips they can use to improve their self-control.

Become a mental energy accountant . Many students plan how they spend their time. Few students plan how they spend their limited self-control energy. Encourage students to spend the next week considering what they will do and how much self-control energy they will need to do it. Being mindful of when to spend and when to conserve their mental energy will help students navigate their environment and achieve their goals.

Build self-control strength . Self-control relies on an all-purpose energy resource. You can strengthen your self-control by doing seemingly unrelated self-control tasks. For two weeks, encourage your students to use their nondominant hand to complete everyday tasks (e.g., cleaning, brushing their teeth). Research indicates that this simple exercise increases self-control in other domains, such as reducing aggression (Denson et al., 2011).

Play offense against your environment . In their book "Willpower," Roy Baumeister and John Tierney (2011) argue that self-controlled people take control over their environment. If they're motivated to lose weight, they do not bring junk food into the house. If they are driven to write 2,000 words a day, they block their email to prevent distractions. Encourage students to identify one way they can change their environment to help them achieve a specific goal. Ask them to implement the change for three days. Later, ask students to share their experiences about how the environmental change influenced their ability and motivation to achieve their goal.

Take the mind out of the middle . Self-control hurts because we have to battle against ourselves. Should I exercise now or later? Should I have zero, one, two or 10 doughnuts? A solution is to take the mind out of the middle by setting up a mental contract, what psychologist Peter Gollwitzer and colleagues call implementation intentions (Gollwitzer & Sheeran, 2006). To achieve an academic goal, students might say, "When I get home from class, I will read Chapter 5." Now the decision-making is done. They know when they will study. It sounds simple, but it works.

Conclusion

How can psychology educators accomplish our educational mission while also giving students the practical information that can help them achieve their goals? Self-control might seem stodgy, but it is our job to show students that self-control will contribute to their success more than their smarts or family background. Self-control levels the playing field. It puts the keys to achievement in students' hands. By showing students what self-control is, how it works and why it is important, we will provide them with knowledge that can help them achieve their goals and have happy, productive and meaningful lives.

References

Baumeister, R. F., & Tierney, J. (2011). Willpower: Rediscovering the greatest human strength. New York: Penguin.

Baumeister, R. F., & Vohs, K. D. (2007). Self-regulation, ego depletion, and motivation. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 1, 115-128.

Denson, T. F., Capper, M. M., Oaten, M., Friese, M., & Schofield, T. P. (2011). Self-control training decreases aggression in response to provocation in aggressive individuals. Journal of Research in Personality, 45, 252-256.

Duckworth, A. L., & Seligman, M. E. P. (2005). Self-discipline outdoes IQ in predicting academic performance of adolescents. Psychological Science, 16, 939-944.

Gollwitzer, P. M., & Sheeran, P. (2006). Implementation intentions and goal achievement: A meta-analysis of effects and processes. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, 38, 69-119.

Hofmann, W., Baumeister, R. F., Förster, G., & Vohs, K. D. (2012). Everyday temptations: An experience sampling study of desire, conflict, and self-control. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 102, 1318-1335.

Levitsky, D A., Garay, J., Nausbaum, M., Neighbors, L., & DellaValle, D. M. (2006). Monitoring weight daily blocks the freshmen weight gain: A model for combating the epidemic of obesity. International Journal of Obesity, 30, 1003-1010.

About the author

Nathan DeWall is professor of psychology and director of the Social Psychology Lab at the University of Kentucky. He received his bachelor's degree from St. Olaf College, a master's degree in social science from the University of Chicago, and a master's degree and PhD in social psychology from Florida State University. DeWall received the 2011 College of Arts and Sciences Outstanding Teaching Award, which recognizes excellence in undergraduate and graduate teaching. In 2011, the Association for Psychological Science identified DeWall as a "Rising Star" for "making significant contributions to the field of psychological science."

DeWall conducts research on close relationships, self-control and aggression. With funding from the National Institutes of Health and the National Science Foundation, he has published over 145 scientific articles and chapters. DeWall's research awards include the SAGE Young Scholars award from the Foundation for Personality and Social Psychology, the Young Investigator Award from the International Society for Research on Aggression, and the Early Career Award from the International Society for Self and Identity. His research has been covered by numerous media outlets, and he blogs for Psychology Today. With David Myers, he is co-host of a new global psychology podcast, Talk Psych. He also is co-author on the David Myers Introduction to Psychology textbook series. Nathan has lectured nationally and internationally, including in Hong Kong, China, the Netherlands, England, Greece, Hungary and Australia.

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Self-control: Teaching students about their greatest inner strength

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What is the key to health, wealth and success? Many students want to know. But educators sometimes sidestep or ignore these questions. We don't want to pigeonhole ourselves as self-help gurus. We focus on what we know. We doggedly pursue our teaching mission: Provide students with knowledge and experiences that will help make them well-rounded, informed and critically thinking adults.

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Self-Regulation Modules—Motivation, Engagement, and Student Voice Toolkit (SATC)

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Self-Regulation Modules—Motivation, Engagement, and Student Voice Toolkit (SATC)

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Motivation, Engagement, and Student Voice Toolkit - Students at the Center

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This professional development series is designed to accompany and help put into practice the ideas in Toshalis and Nakkula's Motivation, Engagement and Student Voice and "Prioritizing Motivation and Engagement" in Anytime, Anywhere: Student-Centered Learning for Schools and Teachers. For many teachers the issues discussed in those pieces are at the heart of the student experience they are trying to...

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Self-Regulation Student Worksheet—Progress Monitoring for Senior Paper

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Self-Regulation Student Worksheet—Progress Monitoring for Senior Paper

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Helping students process their graded exams.

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All too often, when students receive back a graded exam, they focus on a single feature - the score they earned. While this focus on "the grade" is understandable, it can lead students to miss out on several learning opportunities that such assessment can provide:

identifying their own individual areas of strength and weakness to guide further study;

reflecting on the adequacy of their preparation time and the appropriateness of their study strategies; and

characterizing the nature of their errors to find any recurring patterns that could be addressed.

So, to encourage students to process their graded exams more deeply, several faculty members across the university have devised exam wrappers, short handouts that students complete when an exam is turned back to them. These exam wrappers direct students to review their performance (and the instructor's feedback) with an eye toward adapting their future learning.

Examples from Mellon College of Science courses:

The Physics exam wrapper was completed by students during recitation when the first exam was turned back to students. Papers were collected at the end of class, reviewed by the instructor, and then returned to students just before the next exam, as a reminder of their self-discoveries from a few weeks prior.

The Biology exam wrapper was given to students during lecture on the day when the first exam was turned back.

Exam wrappers can be used in various disciplines and to help students think through their learning on different assessments. Here are some examples of similar wrapper activities from classes in Dietrich:

For more information on using exam wrappers in your course or for help in designing an exam wrapper handout, please contact the Eberly Center.

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Exam Wrappers - Eberly Center - Carnegie Mellon University

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Success Learning Strategies: Steps for Completion of Homework

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Success Learning Strategies: Steps for Completion of Homework

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Self-regulating Learning: Impact on Attention, Memory, Language, Spatial and Sequential Ordering, Higher Order Cognition, and Social Cognition

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Self-regulating Learning: Impact on Attention, Memory, Language, Spatial and Sequential Ordering, Higher Order Cognition, and Social Cognition

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Self-regulating Learning: Impact of Attention, Memory, Language, Visual-Spatial and Sequential Thinking, Higher Order Cognition, and Social Cognition - All Kinds of Minds

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Students are more likely to feel confident about themselves as learners if they can rely on their own resources for completing writing assignments and achieving success in school. At the core of successful and lifelong learning, is self-regulation. Self-regulation requires a student to be meta-cogni…

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Activities That Develop Self-Regulated Learning

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Activities That Develop Self-Regulated Learning

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Activities that Develop Self-Regulated Learning

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Examples on this page are drawn from a presentation by Kaatje Kraft and David McConnell at the 2013 SAGE 2YC Supporting Student Success workshop. Crafting your students into self-regulated learners might sound ...

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Helping Students Self-Regulate for Success

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Helping Students Self-Regulate for Success

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Helping Students Self-Regulate for Success - Teachers

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Helping StudentsSet Goals, Get Organized, &Self-Regulate Behavior for Academic SuccessAngela M. HousandUniversity of North Carolina, Wilmingtonhousanda@uncw.edu

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Jump, Wiggle, Learn? Self-Regulation | TEDx Talk

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Jump, Wiggle, Learn? Self-Regulation | TEDx Talk

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Jump, wiggle, learn? Self-Regulation | Candice Charlton and Heidi DeLazzer | TEDxWestVancouverED

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This talk was given at a local TEDx event, produced independently of the TED Conferences. A story of adventure into the world of self-regulation. Candice Charlton is an experienced IB- Elementary (PYP) teacher in West Vancouver who works extensively in the area of self-regulation. Her classroom is a pilot site for Stuart Shanker's Self Regulation Initiative.

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Executive Function Activities for Adolescents

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Executive Function Activities for Adolescents

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Unique Strategies to Help Your Child's Self-Regulation

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Unique Strategies to Help Your Child's Self-Regulation

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Today's blog post about unique strategies to help your child's self-regulation comes courtesy of my blog friend Nina. I don't typically post guest posts, but Nina consistently impresses me with her parenting themed blog posts, so when she offered I happily said yes! Self-regulation is an important life skill, and Nina's tips are straightforward and effective!
Do these scenarios sound familiar to you?

Your child follows the rules... but only if you're looking.

You nag your child to do things he should already know how and when to do, such as washing his hands after using the restroom or putting his shoes away at the front door.

During meltdowns and tantrums, your child has a difficult time controlling his frustration and calming down.

Behind each of the scenarios lies a challenge: your child is learning how to regulate himself.

What is self-regulation? It's not merely obedience or compliance. Self-regulation is following the rules and doing what's right even when no one is watching.

Self-regulation is also the ability to control your impulses, whether that means starting something (like remembering to brush your teeth after dinner) or stopping something (like learning how to calm down after a crying fit).

The benefits of self-regulation also include:

Delayed gratification: Kids can forfeit a small reward now (however tempting it may be) for bigger rewards later.

Kids can consider the consequences of their actions instead of acting impulsively.

Kids can better pay attention and conform to classroom and social rules.

Considering all the benefits, what are some practical and actionable things you can do to encourage self-regulation in your child?

Use lists and calendars.

We teach kids best by modeling. And you probably practice one of the easiest ways to model self-regulation: using lists and calendars.
Why do lists and calendars help with self-regulation?

Kids learn that they can't have everything they want right now

Kids learn to plan

Kids learn to stay organized

Kids learn not to act impulsively

Show your kids the lists you make, and point them to the family calendar. Write the lists in plain view of their sight. Encourage your kids to make lists of their own, such as items they'd like to have or places they can't wait to visit.

Set timers and alarms.

Sometimes we can all use a little help regulating our impulses using timers and alarms. Let's say your daughter wants to play outside, but "a few minutes" turns into an hour, complete with the ensuing argument about refusing to come back in even longer than that.

Instead, set a timer for 15 minutes or whichever promised time you agreed on. If your child is old enough to tell time, encourage her to keep track herself.

Implement routines.

Routines are like second parents: They do a lot of the job for you so you don't have to nag. They also imprint a running thread in your child's mind about what's next to come. They'll learn that dessert comes after dinner, that playtime comes after homework.

Similarly, give your child expectations. They'll regulate themselves better when they know what to anticipate, learn to plan, and can rely on the predictability and structure to their day.

Teach kids how to handle something they want now but can't have.

There's value to not giving kids everything they want. Besides preventing spoiling your kids, not giving kids everything is also an opportunity to teach self-regulation.

It can be uncomfortable for parents to handle the ensuing argument or tantrum when kids don't get what they want. Below are some options to seek:

Look for an opportunity for doing it later. For instance, if your son wants to eat the lollipop, explain it's not that he can't eat it ever, just that he has to wait until after dinner.

Find a substitute. Say your daughter wants to play with your phone but she's not allowed. Show her a toy phone that she can play with. More importantly, include her in the search for a substitute: "My phone isn't a toy, but let's look in your toy bin for something you can play with."

Borrow. Even if they can't own something outright, they can learn to borrow and, just as important, return the item at the appropriate time.

Practice waiting. It really is okay for kids to wait, however uncomfortable it may be. They'll learn to find ways to keep themselves occupied and make the waiting period more bearable (instead of succumbing to bad choices).

Accept the predicament. And if kids really can't get what they want, show them how to accept their predicament. Acceptance isn't defeat; it is acknowledging what can't be, despite our best efforts.

Lessen distractions.

Imagine trying to complete your homework when all you really want to do is play with your new toy truck. Now imagine the television on, little siblings running around, and adults speaking in loud voices.

Convincing yourself-regulating yourself-to finish the homework would be much harder, wouldn't it?

When you know your kids need to get a task done, minimize the distractions. He'll have less obstacles in his way.

Play red light/green light games.

These fun games are more than simple recess activities-they're a great way to help your child control her impulses, from knowing when to stop to when to go. The rules are simple: you holler "red light!" or "green light!" (or hold up a red or green sign), and depending on the color, she can either run towards you or learn to pause and stop. You can even add variables like "slow" or "fast."

Another similar and classic game is Simon Says. You say commands such as "Touch your shoulders," but she can only do so if you precede the command with "Simon says, 'Touch your shoulders'." Again, she's learning to listen and regulate her impulses.

*

Self-regulation helps kids in so many ways, from controlling their emotions to running daily tasks and even to setting long-term goals.
Do you find yourself practicing the above techniques to help your child learn self-regulation? Let us know in the comments!
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From Los Angeles, Nina is a working mom to three boys-a five-year-old and toddler twins. Click here to read her blog, Sleeping Should Be Easy, where she writes about parenting and everything she's learning about being a mom.

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Unique Strategies to Help Your Child's Self-Regulation

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Today's blog post about unique strategies to help your child's self-regulation comes courtesy of my blog friend Nina. I don't typically post guest posts, but Nina consistently impresses me with her parenting themed blog posts, so when she offered I happily said yes! Self-regulation is an important life skill, and Nina's tips are straightforward and effective!

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How to Help Kids Develop Self-Regulation

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How to Help Kids Develop Self-Regulation

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The individual set of self-regulation strategies that are usually used by successful students fall into three categories: personal, behavioral, and environmental.

Personal: These strategies usually involve how a student organizes and interprets information and can include:

Organizing and transforming information

outlining

summarizing

rearrangement of materials

highlighting

flashcards/index cards

draw pictures, diagrams, charts

webs/mapping

Goal setting and planning/standard setting

sequencing, timing, completing

time management and pacing

Keeping records and monitoring

note-taking

lists of errors made

record of marks

portfolio, keeping all drafts of assignments

Rehearsing and memorizing (written or verbal; overt or covert)

mnemonic devices

teaching someone else the material

making sample questions

using mental imagery

using repetition

Behavioral: These strategies involve actions that the student takes.

Self-evaluating (checking quality or progress)

task analysis (What does the teacher want me to do? What do I want out of it?)

self-instructions; enactive feedback

attentiveness

Self-consequating

treats to motivate; self-reinforcement

arrangement or imagination of punishments; delay of gratification

Environmental: These strategies involve seeking assistance and structuring of the physical study environment.

Seeking information (library, Internet)

library resources

Internet resources

reviewing cards

rereading records, tests, textbooks

Environmental structuring

selecting or arranging the physical setting

isolating/ eliminating or minimizing distractions

break up study periods and spread them over time

Seeking social assistance

from peers

from teachers or other adults

emulate exemplary models

Next Section: How-to Instruction for Self-Regulated Learning Strategies
Previous Section: Phases of Self-Regulation

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The individual set of self-regulation strategies that are usually used by successful students fall into three categories: personal, behavioral, and environmental.

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Sample Lesson Plans for Self-Regulation Instruction

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Sample Lesson Plans for Self-Regulation Instruction

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CCC Introduction to Self-Regulation Video

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CCC Introduction to Self-Regulation Video

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Uploaded by Research Collaboration on 2015-12-08.

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Why Understanding Obstacles Is Essential to Achieving Goals

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Why Understanding Obstacles Is Essential to Achieving Goals

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"See the glass as half full."

While inspiring words might provide a moment of motivation, it turns out they can have an adverse effect on achieving those goals. According to the latest research, the positive attitudes meant to provide inspiration may be the ones that get in the way of accomplishing those dreams.

For 20 years, psychology professor Gabriele Oettingen of New York University and the University of Hamburg has been examining positive thinking and her conclusion is clear. All that positive thinking can trick the dreamer into believing she's already done the work to get to the desired goal, squelching the motivation to actually go after it. "Positive thinking alone is not enough," Oettingen says. Indeed, fantasizing about success without an anchor in reality can actually diminish the likelihood of a better outcome. "[Positive thinking] has to be done in the right way and in the right form."

What does contribute to success, she says, is the conscious adoption of a nuanced kind of optimism, one that takes into account the real-life barriers to success. In her recent book Rethinking Positive Thinking: Inside the New Science of Motivation, Oettingen shares a simple cognitive tool that can help children and adults stay motivated to achieve a goal. She calls it "WOOP," for wish, outcome, obstacle, and plan, a more digestible label than the social-science term "mental contrasting with implementation intention."

Here's an example of how it works.

Wish: An 11 th grader, say, wants to get an A in Honors English. This is his wish.

Outcome: Next, he thinks about what would happen if he achieved this goal, his desired outcome. Perhaps his teacher would recommend him for AP English, boosting his college options. His parents might stop nagging him about getting his assignments done, improving his relationships at home.

Obstacle: The 11 th grader now has to engage in mental contrasting, and think about the internal obstacles that get in the way of achieving the goal. Maybe he feels tired and skips English homework when basketball practice goes late, and he's unmotivated to diagram sentences. Perhaps he procrastinates on longer papers because he's anxious about starting, and ends up handing in a rushed and sloppy report.

Plan: The final leg of the technique is to create a plan that sets up the obstacle and proposed action in a simple statement: "if obstacle x, then I will perform behavior y." The 11 th grader might come up with something like this: "If I feel tired after basketball practice, then I will sit down and do at least half of the sentences for my English homework." Or, "If I get anxious about my research paper, then I will start work on it for 30 minutes." He might even find an opportunity to form a preventive "if-then" plan: "if basketball practice starts late, then I will use the time to work on my research paper."

This cognitive technique is effective, Oettingen says, because it works on the nonconscious mind. Fantasizing about attaining a feasible wish along with the obstacle that stands in the way of attaining it has the effect of tying dreams to reality. "With such a mental linkage in place, an individual couldn't think about her dream any longer without reference to the obstacle, and the obstacle would serve as a nonconscious spur to take action," she writes. "The association in turn explains actual, observable changes in behavior." Another advantage of the strategy is its simplicity: it depends on neither special cognitive skills nor abilities, and can be used at any age.

Oettingen and colleagues have tested the technique in schools, and the results are significant. In peer-reviewed studies carried out with elementary and middle school children in Germany and the United States, students who practiced mental contrasting were better able to learn and retain new foreign language words than students who only fantasized about success. Another study involving high school students found that those who set up a plan for overcoming their obstacles to studying for the PSAT practiced more diligently than a control group that merely dreamt about it. Later research showed that three hours of training in WOOP improved the GPA, attendance rates, and general behavior of fifth graders versus those of who were coached just to think positively. And middle school children considered "at risk" for ADHD showed greater self-regulation when exposed to minimal instruction in mental contrasting and implementation intention-the "wish-outcome-obstacle" and "plan" parts of WOOP.

Besides helping sustain motivation and self-regulation, this cognitive technique also helps children slow the world down, inviting them to look inward to discover what they want to do and where they want to go. "The children are often overwhelmed with messages," Oettingen says; WOOP "allows them to settle down and think, 'what do I really want?'" By summoning children to acknowledge what holds them back, "it gets rid of excuses," she says, and empowers children to take action against their inner obstacles. To enable wider use of the technique, Oettingen has set up a free WOOP app to help kids get to college and stay there.

Oettingen's research complements the teaching approach of acclaimed chess instructor Elizabeth Spiegel, who took kids from an underprivileged junior high school in Brooklyn to a national chess championship. Spiegel insists that her students think and rethink the possible outcomes of a chess move, and to find and correct the mistakes in their thinking.

Oettingen is careful to point out that hope is a vital and necessary part of achievement, but that relentless pie-in-the-sky optimism detached from reality just hurts children. It desiccates motivation and implies that having a less sunny view of events is a sign of defective thinking and a deformed attitude. "It's a load on people who doubt and question things, and who see things in a more differentiated way," she says. "Positive dreams are not enough to actually achieve them."

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Why Understanding Obstacles is Essential to Achieving Goals

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"See the glass as half full." While inspiring words might provide a moment of motivation, it turns out they can have an adverse effect on achieving those goals.