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Lots of different videos. Including some for dads, postnatal exercise, mental health and premature babies.

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Lots of different videos. Including some for dads, postnatal exercise, mental health and premature babies.

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Our extensive video library includes tips on breastfeeding, exercise and mental health. Find out more: for over 300 videos, from the developing foetus to labour, teething to weaning, our free parenting app, Baby Buddy, brings you the best information from the NHS, trusted charities and leading experts, through short videos and articles delivered straight to your phone.

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Does your baby want to be on you all the time? Remember this!

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Your Baby Is Not Faulty - Bridget Supple

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What happens when you are discharged for hospital? Also contains some useful practical baby care information.

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What happens when you are discharged for hospital? Also contains some useful practical baby care information.

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Maternity Discharge video - Peterborough City Hospital

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A site with support links

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Maternal Mental Health Alliance

Also available in Welsh:

Royal College of Psychiatrists

You might be worried about how COVID-19 and the news around it can affect your pregnancy, your baby or your mental health. This resource is for any woman who is planning a pregnancy, is pregnant or has recently had a baby and is worried about her mental health during the COVID-19 outbreak. It's also for their partners, families and friends.

Perinatal Mental Health Partnership UK

Facebook page hosted by the Perinatal Mental Health Partnership UK, offering information for parents about staying well and managing mental health problems during pregnancy and after having a baby.

PANDAS

Mental health support for pregnant and new parents. PANDAS offer a free helpline 0808 1961 776 and email support Monday-Sunday offering signposting and a listening ear for parents experiencing mental health difficulties during pregnancy or after having a baby.

Centre for Interactive Mental Health Services - Bliss

Bliss is an 8 session interactive online therapy program for depression that you complete on your own. The program is based on psychotherapy treatment called cognitive behavioural therapy or CBT for short. CBT has been shown to be effective treatment for depression. The program is designed to teach you techniques that have been shown to be effective at improving your mood and mental health.

Anxiety UK

Anxiety UK - advice and helpline. Anxiety UK offer support for individuals experiencing anxiety and have a dedicated service for people experiencing increased leveld of anxiety as a result of Coronavirus. The site offers practical advice and online support including access to psychological therapies.

OCD Action

Information, telephone and email support for anyone affected by Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

No Panic

No Panic is a registered charity that helps and supports those living with Panic Attacks, Phobias, Obsessive Compulsive Disorders and other related anxiety disorders.

The helpline 0300 772 9844 operates every day 10am to 10pm

PND and Me

Twitter Chat by @PNDandme every Wednesday 8-9pm and on Facebook. A very popular forum providing peer support for mothers and fathers during pregnancy and after having a baby who are experiencing difficulties with their emotional and mental health.

Action on PostPartum Psychosis

APP provide evidence-based information and support for families who have experience of postpartum psychosis or who feel they or a family member is experiencing symptoms of postpartum psychosis. This guidance offers information about accessing services, support and treatment during the Coronavirus outbreak.

This Mum Moves

We know there is a lot for you to think about during pregnancy and motherhood without having to worry about how active you should be and what's safe for you to do.

This Mum Moves is here to help guide you on your way - with online workouts for pregnant women and new mums.

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**Parenting and the COVID-19 pandemic** - IHV

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You are not alone The iHV is dedicated to supporting the health and wellbeing of all families and we have put together links and resources from trusted organisations and websites to support you during the COVID-19 pandemic. This page is being regularly reviewed and updated.

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Postnatal  and pregnancy wellbeing plan 

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Postnatal  and pregnancy wellbeing plan 

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What to expect in the first few days after birth, including your baby’s appearance, birthmarks, tests and fontanelles.

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Looking after your mental health during the coronavirus outbreak. 

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Looking after your mental health during the coronavirus outbreak. 

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The Mental Health Foundation is part of the national mental health response providing support to address the mental health and psychosocial aspects of the Coronavirus outbreak, alongside colleagues at Public Health England and the Department of Health and Social Care.

Infectious disease outbreaks, like the current Coronavirus (Covid 19), can be scary and can affect our mental health. While it is important to stay informed, there are also many things we can do to support and manage our wellbeing during such times.

Here are some tips we hope will help you, your friends and your family to look after your mental health at a time when there is much discussion of potential threats to our physical health.

Try to avoid speculation and look up reputable sources on the outbreak

Rumour and speculation can fuel anxiety. Having access to good quality information about the virus can help you feel more in control.

You can get up-to-date information and advice on the virus here:

Follow hygiene advice such as washing your hands more often than usual, for 20 seconds with soap and hot water (sing 'happy birthday' to yourself twice to make sure you do this for 20 seconds). You should do this whenever you get home or into work, blow your nose, sneeze or cough, eat or handle food. If you can't wash your hands straightaway, use hand sanitiser and then wash them at the next opportunity.

You should also use tissues if you sneeze and make sure you dispose of them quickly; and stay at home if you are feeling unwell.

Try to stay connected

At times of stress, we work better in company and with support. Try and keep in touch with your friends and family or contact a helpline for emotional support.

It is a good idea to stick to your daily routine. You may also like to focus on the things you can do if you feel able to:

Stay in touch with friends on social media but try not to sensationalise things. If you are sharing content, use this from trusted sources, and remember that your friends might be worried too.

Talk to your children

Involving our family and children in our plans for good health is essential. We need be alert to and ask children what they have heard about the outbreak and support them, without causing them alarm.

We need to minimise the negative impact it has on our children and explain the facts to them. Discuss the news with them but try and avoid over-exposure to coverage of the virus. Be as truthful as possible.

Let's not avoid the 'scary topic' but engage in a way that is appropriate for them. We have more advice on talking with your children about world news.

Try to anticipate distress

It is normal to feel vulnerable and overwhelmed as we read news about the outbreak, especially if you have experienced trauma or a mental health problem in the past, or if you have a long-term physical health condition that makes you more vulnerable to the effects of the coronavirus.

It's important to acknowledge these feelings and remind each other to look after our physical and mental health. We should also be aware of and avoid increasing habits that may not be helpful in the long term, like smoking and drinking.

Try and reassure people you know who may be worried and check in with people who you know are living alone.

Try not to make assumptions

Don't judge people and avoid jumping to conclusions about who is responsible for the spread of the disease. The Coronavirus can affect anyone, regardless of gender, ethnicity or sex.

Try to manage how you follow the outbreak in the media

There is extensive news coverage about the outbreak. If you find that the news is causing you huge stress, it's important to find a balance.

It's best that you don't avoid all news and that you keep informing and educating yourself, but limit your news intake if it is bothering you.

How should people deal with being in self-isolation or in quarantine?

If there's a chance you could have coronavirus, you may be asked to stay away from other people ( self-isolate).

For people that are in self-isolation or are in quarantine, this may seem like a daunting prospect. It will help to try and see it as a different period of time in your life, and not necessarily a bad one, even if you didn't choose it.

It will mean a different rhythm of life, a chance to be in touch with others in different ways than usual. Be in touch with other people regularly on social media, e-mail or on the phone, as they are still good ways of being close to the people who matter to you.

Create a daily routine that prioritises looking after yourself. You could try reading more or watching movies, having an exercise routine, trying new relaxation techniques, or finding new knowledge on the internet. Try and rest and view this as a new if unusual experience, that might have its benefits.

Make sure your wider health needs are being looked after such as having enough prescription medicines available to you.

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Looking after your mental health during the Coronavirus outbreak

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The Mental Health Foundation is part of the national mental health response providing support to address the mental health and psychosocial aspects of the Coronavirus outbreak, alongside colleagues at Public Health England and the Department of Health and Social Care. Infectious disease outbreaks, like the current Coronavirus (Covid 19), can be scary and can affect our mental health.

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10 benefits of skin-to-skin contact | baby gooroo

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Proponents of skin-to-skin care recommend the practice continue throughout the hospital stay and beyond.

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All births in England, Wales and Northern Ireland must be registered within 42 days of the child being born.

You should do this at the local register office for the area where the baby was born or at the hospital before the mother leaves. The hospital will tell you if you can register the birth there.

If you cannot register the birth in the area where the baby was born, you can go to another register office and they will send your details to the correct office.

Information you need when registering a birth

When registering the birth, you should know:

place and date of the birth

name, surname and sex of the baby

parents' names, surnames and address

places and dates of parents' birth

date of parents' marriage or civil partnership

parents' jobs

mother's maiden surname

You might not need to give all of this information, depending on who is registering the birth.

What you should take

You should take at least one form of identification when you go to the register office. You can use:

passport

birth certificate

deed poll

driving licence

proof of address (for example, a utility bill)

Council Tax bill

marriage or civil partnership certificate

You should also take your child's personal child health record or 'red book' as some registrars may ask to see it.

If you're going to the register office on your own, you may need proof of paternity from the other parent before you give their details.

After the birth is registered

Once you've registered the birth, you may be able to claim:

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Find out how to register a birth - who can register, birth certificates

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How do you feel about your baby's birth? What to do / where to go if you need support

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Where are my pelvic floor muscles?

Your pelvic floor muscles surround and support all the organs in your pelvis - your womb, bowels and bladder.

You can find out where the pelvic floor muscles are and how you control them next time you go to the toilet. As you wee, try to stop the flow briefly. The muscles you use to do this are your pelvic floor muscles.

Don't do this more than once, though - it's not good for your bladder to stop mid-wee and doing it regularly may lead to a urinary tract infection.

During your pregnancy, your pelvic floor muscles will loosen due to hormonal changes in your body. This loosening, along with your growing baby pressing on your bladder, may cause you to leak urine when you cough, laugh, sneeze or exercise.

Doing pelvic floor exercises will strengthen these muscles and help you control any accidents. It will also help you ease your baby out and recover faster after the birth.

How do I exercise my pelvic floor muscles?

Once you've found your pelvic floor muscles, try stopping an imaginary wee rather than a real one. Once you can locate them like this, you can exercise them any time you like by tightening and lifting them.

To tighten and lift your pelvic floor muscles, imagine doing the following at the same time:

Squeezing your bottom as if stopping a poo

Squeezing to stop the flow of wee

Squeezing as though you're gripping a tampon in your vagina.

You can do pelvic floor exercises anywhere you like. Nobody will know what you're doing - as long as you don't raise your eyebrows each time you squeeze!

You can exercise on the bus, while you're on the phone or waiting in the supermarket queue.

Practise at home!

Practise these exercises in front of a mirror. Then you'll know you can do them without making faces before you try them on a crowded bus or at work!

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Your pelvic floor muscles surround and support all the organs in your pelvis - your womb, bowels and bladder. You can find out where the pelvic floor muscles are and how you control them next time you go to the toilet. As you wee, try to stop the flow briefly.

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Tips from Babycentre.co.ukfor prevention and what to do if it just won't come! Fully referenced.

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In this article

Why am I constipated after giving birth?

It's fairly normal not to do a poo for a couple of days after having your baby. At least a quarter of mums are constipated after giving birth (Lamb and Sanders 2015).

If you had your baby in hospital, you may not have felt like using the toilet there. And it's only natural to feel slightly apprehensive about going to the loo if you have stitches and bruising.

It's likely to be even more difficult and worrying for you if you had a severe tear that affected your back passage (anus) (Bick and Hunter 2017, Thakar et al 2014).

All this can mean you find yourself uncomfortably constipated after your baby's arrival.

There are also physical reasons why you may not be able to do a poo:

Your body is still recovering from the effects of pregnancy. The high levels of progesterone during pregnancy, and the weight of your baby on your intestines, slowed down your digestive system.

On top of this, your digestive system slows dramatically while you're in labour.

If you had opioid drugs for pain relief during labour, such as pethidine or diamorphine, it may have affected your bowels.

Damage to your pelvic floor during birth may make it harder for you to empty your bowels.
(Lamb and Sanders 2015)

You are more likely to have bowel trouble if:

Your medical team used instruments such as forceps or ventouse to help you to give birth (Lamb and Sanders 2015).

You gave birth to a baby weighing more than 4.5kg (Lamb and Sanders 2015).

You are taking iron tablets, which can cause constipation (NHS 2016a).

You had a third-degree or fourth-degree tear during labour (Bick and Hunter 2017, Thakar et al 2014).

Will it hurt when I do a poo?

You may not feel anything much if you had a vaginal birth, as the area between your vagina and anus ( perineum) may feel quite numb. That's because the nerves inside and around your vagina are stretched (Ashton-Miller and Delancey 2009, Hallock and Handa 2016).

If you've had stitches, or you have piles, you will be sore around your perineum and back passage (anus). Try not to let that put you off doing a poo, as delaying it will only make the pain and discomfort of constipation worse (Turawa 2014).

If you had a severe tear during birth, your midwife will give you a stool softener to make doing a poo easier for you, and to protect your wound (Thakar et al 2014).

Your stitches won't tear when you're going to the loo. However, try not to push or bear down, as this can strain your pelvic floor, and make healing slower.

Many new mums are anxious about doing a poo. However, worrying may worsen constipation (Lamb and Sanders 2015, Turawa 2014), because it makes you tighten your back passage instead of relaxing and opening it.

When you're on the toilet, try not to hurry things along (NICE 2015). Distract yourself by reading a magazine or book (Bannister 2009).

Fold a clean sanitary pad in half, and hold it next to your perineum or over your stitches, from the front. Doing this helps to support your pelvic floor, and can ease any soreness you're feeling.

How can I ease constipation after giving birth?

Start eating and drinking regularly as soon as you can after you've had your baby, and try to get up and move about.

Drinking fluids makes your poo softer and easier to pass (NHS 2015, NICE 2006). The atmosphere in hospital wards can be very dry, so you can easily become dehydrated without realising it.

Ideally, drink between eight and 10 glasses of fluid a day (NICE 2015). If you're breastfeeding, you'll feel thirsty, so be sure to have a drink handy (NHS 2016b).

Eat high-fibre foods, including wholegrains, fruits and vegetables (Lamb and Sanders 2015, NICE 2015). Juices made from apples and grapes can ease constipation. These fruits are high in sorbitol, which is a natural laxative (NICE 2015).

Be a bit cautious about adding extra wheatbran as roughage to your diet. For some women, it can help to get things moving, but for others it causes tummy cramps and bloating (Lamb and Sanders 2015, NICE 2015). It just depends on what works for you.

Keeping active helps to ease constipation (NICE 2015). Take short walks around the ward, or around your home. Sitting or lying down for long periods makes constipation more likely to happen. It also helps to move around, rather than heading for the sofa, after having something to eat.

Most people feel the need to do a poo in the morning, or after a meal (NICE 2015). So try not to miss out on these opportunities to go to the loo. This can be a challenge when you're more tuned in to your newborn's needs than your own body clock (Lamb and Sanders 2015).

However, when the urge to go to the loo finally comes, don't ignore it. Sit fully on the toilet, and raise your feet so you're on tiptoes. This will bring your knees slightly higher than your hips. If possible, put your feet on a stool (NHS 2015).

Giving yourself a tummy massage may help to move things along (Guy's and St Thomas' 2014, Lamb and Sanders 2015). Massage is not suitable in the early days and weeks if you've had a caesarean. Ask your midwife or health visitor for advice about whether it's right for you, and how to do it (Guy's and St Thomas' 2014).

I've tried and I still can't go. What can I do?

Speak to your midwife. She should ask you whether you've done a poo after three days anyway, so there's nothing to feel embarrassed about (Bick and Hunter 2017).

If changes to your diet aren't helping enough (NICE 2015), your midwife can prescribe a type of laxative that softens your poo, making it easier to pass (stool softener) (Bick and Hunter 2017, NHS 2016c). Stool softeners are gentle, and may take a couple of days to work, so there's no need to worry that they'll cause diarrhoea or an urgent need to go (NHS 2016c).

It's important to talk to your midwife, because putting up with constipation can make you miserable, just when you want to be enjoying your new baby (Lamb and Sanders 2015). If you don't tackle constipation by changing your diet, drinking enough, and being more active, it can continue to be a problem for you (Turawa 2014).

There are different types of laxative, ranging from tablets, to liquids, to suppositories (NHS 2016a, NICE 2015).

Your midwife or health visitor will start you on the most gentle type of laxative (Bick and Hunter 2017). That's one reason why it's always better to speak to your midwife, doctor or health visitor, rather than buying laxatives over the counter. Your needs will depend on whether or not you are taking any other medicine, and whether you are breastfeeding (NICE 2015).

Here are some tips to keep you constipation-free in the coming months:

Act on your body's urges, and be aware of the cues to poo when they happen. Most people feel the need to poo in the morning, or about half an hour after a meal (NICE 2015).

Don't take medicines with constipating side-effects (Lamb and Sanders 2015). This includes some painkillers such as codeine, so ask for advice from your midwife, GP or health visitor.

Eat regular meals that include lots of wholegrains, fruits and vegetables, and drink about eight to 10 glasses of fluid a day (NICE 2015).

Tea and coffee can count towards your fluid intake, but go easy on them if you're drinking caffeinated versions. Caffeine can make you dehydrated because it stimulates your body to get rid of fluid (diuretic) (NHS 2016b). You also need to watch how much caffeine you have if you're breastfeeding.

Try to take some exercise every day (NICE 2015). Even just a short walk with your baby in her pushchair will make a difference.

Speak to your GP if you continue to suffer from piles or anal fissures. Fissures are little tears in your back passage, often caused by constipation (Lamb and Sanders 2015, NHS 2016d).

Suffering from piles? Get expert advice from a midwife on treating and preventing haemorrhoids.
Last reviewed: August 2017

References

Ashton-Miller JA, Delancey JOL. 2009. On the Biomechanics of Vaginal Birth and Common Sequelae Annu Rev Biomed Eng 11: 163-176

Bannister T. 2009. Physical Therapy Management of Pelvic Floor Dyssynergia, Journal of Women's Health Physical Therapy 33(3):6-21

Lamb K, Sanders R. 2015. Constipation and haemorrhoids: A midwifery perspective for the childbearing continuum. BJM 23(3):171-176

Bick D, Hunter C. 2017. Content and organization of postnatal care. In: MacDonald S, Johnson G. eds. Mayes' Midwifery. 15th ed. London: Elsevier, 695-704

Guy's and St Thomas'. 2014. Abdominal massage for constipation. Guy's and St Thomas' NHS Foundation Trust. Advice from the Pelvic Floor Unit. www.guysandstthomas.nhs.uk [Accessed August 2017]

Hallock JL, Handa VL2. 2016. The epidemiology of pelvic floor disorders and childbirth. Obstet Gynecol Clin North Am 43(1):1-13

NHS. 2015. Constipation. NHS Choices, Health A-Z. www.nhs.uk [Accessed August 2017]

NHS. 2016a. Iron deficiency anaemia - Treatment. NHS Choices, Health A-Z. www.nhs.uk [Accessed August 2017]

NHS. 2016b. Breastfeeding and diet. NHS Choices, Health A-Z. www.nhs.uk [Accessed August 2017]

NHS. 2016c. Laxatives. NHS Choices, Health A-Z. www.nhs.uk [Accessed August 2017]

NHS. 2016d. Anal fissures. NHS Choices, Health A-Z. www.nhs.uk [Accessed August 2017]

NICE. 2006. Routine postnatal care of women and their babies. National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence www.nice.org.uk [Accessed August 2017]

NICE. 2015. Constipation. National Institute for Health and Care Excellence, Clinical Knowledge Summaries. cks.nice.org.uk [Accessed August 2017]

Thakar R, Sultan AH, Raynor MD, et al. 2014. Care of the perineum, repair and female genital mutilation. In: Fraser DM, Cooper MA. eds. Myles Textbook for Midwives. 16th ed. Edinburgh: Churchill Livingstone, 312-325

Turawa EB, Musekiwa A, Rohwer AC. 2014. Interventions for treating postpartum constipation. Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews (2)CD010273. onlinelibrary.wiley.com [Accessed August 2017]

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In this article It's fairly normal not to do a poo for a couple of days after having your baby. At least a quarter of mums are constipated after giving birth (Lamb and Sanders 2015). If you had your baby in hospital, you may not have felt like using the toilet there.

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Stiches, Piles, Toilet,

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Advice about stitches, piles, bleeding and other physical changes after birth, plus tips to help you make a healthy recovery.
If you've had a caesarean, see recovering from a caesarean.

Stitches

If you've had stitches after tearing or an episiotomy (cut), bathe them every day to help prevent infection. Have a bath or shower with plain warm water then carefully pat yourself dry.

If your stitches are sore or uncomfortable, tell your midwife.

Painkillers can help. If you're breastfeeding, check with your pharmacist, midwife or GP before you buy over-the-counter painkillers.

Stitches usually dissolve by the time the cut or tear has healed, but sometimes they have to be taken out.

Going to the toilet

At first, the thought of peeing can be a bit frightening - because of the soreness. Drinking lots of water dilutes your urine, which may make it sting less.

Tell your midwife if:

you're finding it really difficult to pee

you feel very sore

you notice an unpleasant smell

You probably won't have a poo for a few days after the birth, but it's important not to let yourself get constipated.

Eat plenty of fresh fruit, vegetables, salad, wholegrain cereals and wholemeal bread, and drink plenty of water.

If you've had stitches, it's very unlikely you'll break them, or open up the cut or tear again.

It might feel better if you hold a pad of clean tissue over the stitches when pooing. Try not to strain.

Talk to your midwife or GP if you have constipation that won't go away. A gentle laxative may help.

Also tell your midwife or GP if poo is leaking or you're pooing when you don't mean to.

Bladder control

After having a baby, it's quite common to leak a bit of pee if you laugh, cough or move suddenly.

Pelvic floor exercises can help with this but tell your GP at your postnatal check if they aren't. They may refer you to a physiotherapist.

Piles

Piles are very common after birth but usually disappear within a few days.

Eat plenty of fresh fruit, vegetables, salad, wholegrain cereals and wholemeal bread, and drink plenty of water. This should make pooing easier and less painful.

Try not to push or strain - this will make the piles worse.

Let your midwife know if you feel very uncomfortable. They can give you a cream to soothe the piles.

Bleeding after birth (lochia)

You'll bleed from your vagina after the birth. It will be quite heavy at first, and you'll need super-absorbent sanitary towels. Change them regularly, washing your hands before and afterwards.

It isn't a good idea to use tampons until after your 6-week postnatal check because they could increase your chance of getting an infection.

See when you can start using tampons after birth.

You may notice the bleeding is redder and heavier when you breastfeed. This happens because breastfeeding makes your womb contract. You may also feel cramps similar to period pains.

The bleeding will carry on for a few weeks. It will gradually turn a brownish colour and decrease until it finally stops.

If you're losing blood in large clots, tell your midwife. You may need some treatment.

When will my periods start again after pregnancy?

It's hard to be exact about when your periods will start again, as everyone is different.

If you bottle feed your baby, or combine bottle feeding with breastfeeding, your first period could start as soon as 5 to 6 weeks after you give birth.

If you fully breastfeed (including at night) without any bottle feeding, your periods may not start again until you start to reduce breastfeeding.

How soon after giving birth can I get pregnant?

You can get pregnant as little as 3 weeks after the birth of your baby, even if you're breastfeeding and your periods have not started again yet.

Find out more about when you can use contraception after having a baby.

How soon can I use tampons after giving birth?

You should not use tampons until you've had your 6-week postnatal check. This is because you'll still have a wound where the placenta joined with the wall of your womb, and you may also have tears or cuts in or around your vagina.

Using internal sanitary products like tampons and menstrual cups before this wound has healed could increase your chance of getting an infection.

Use maternity pads or sanitary towels during this time while your body is still healing.

Breasts

To begin with, your breasts will produce a yellowish liquid called colostrum for your baby.

On the third or fourth day, they may feel tight and tender as they start to produce milk.

Wearing a supportive nursing bra may help. Speak to your midwife if you're very uncomfortable.

Read more about breastfeeding in the first few days.

Tummy

After delivery, your tummy will probably still be a lot bigger than before pregnancy. This is partly because your muscles have stretched.

If you eat a balanced diet and get some exercise, your shape should gradually return.

Breastfeeding helps because it makes your womb contract. You may feel quite painful period-like cramps while you're feeding.

You could also try these gentle postnatal tummy exercises.

Is it something serious?

Tell your midwife, health visitor or GP straight away if you get any of these symptoms.

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Advice about stitches, piles, bleeding and other physical changes after birth, plus tips to help you make a healthy recovery. If you've had a caesarean, see recovering from a caesarean. If you've had stitches after tearing or an episiotomy (cut), bathe them every day to help prevent infection.

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Advice and support for pre and post natal depression

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Advice and support for pre and post natal depression

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We have a team of trained and dedicated volunteers, many of whom are studying and/or working within healthcare, midwifery or health services. Please call our free helpline for support and advice with empathy. Our lines are open 7 days a week, 11am until 10pm.

I'd like to speak to someone

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We have a team of trained and dedicated volunteers, many of whom are studying and/or working within healthcare, midwifery or health services. Please call our free helpline for support and advice with empathy. Our lines are open 7 days a week, 11am until 10pm. I'd like to speak to someone

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Talk by Helen Ball (co-founder of Basis).

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Talk by Helen Ball (co-founder of Basis).

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An excellent explanation of the research, including parents' perceptions of how babies' sleep length and patterns.

https://youtu.be/g5fOogsUpIk

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Evidence-based guidelines

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Postnatal care up to 8 weeks after birth

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This guidance has been updated and replaced by postnatal care

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1. Every woman bleeds after they give birth

You will have vaginal bleeding after you've given birth(NHS, 2021). This bleeding is known as lochia. The lochia is a combination of mucous, tissue and blood that your womb sheds as it replaces its lining after you've given birth (UHS NHS Foundation Trust, 2020).

2. Bleeding after birth may last for a while

Bleeding often lasts for around for four to six weeks, but could last up to 12 weeks after your baby's born (RCOG, 2016). If you're worried, you can talk to a health professional.

Bleeding will start off heavy and red to browny red. It will become lighter in colour and flow over time (NHS, 2021).

Here's what you can expect:

Day 1: Fresh red to brownish-red blood. Heavy flow that probably soaks one maternity pad every few hours, with one or two clots or several smaller ones.

Day 2 to 6: Darker brown or pinkish red blood. Moderate flow with 7 cm to 12 cm stains on your maternity pads and smaller blood clots.

Day 7 to 10: Darker brown or pinkish red blood, becoming lighter. Variable but lighter flow, with less than a 7 cm stain on your pads.

Days 11 to 14: Darker brown or pinkish red blood, becoming lighter. Lighter flow, you may have some sanitary towels that are hardly stained.

Week 3 to 4: Paler, possibly a creamy white blood loss. Lighter flow.

Week 5 to 6: Brown, pinkish red, or creamy yellow stains, possibly for several weeks, and possibly only on some days (UHS NHS Foundation Trust, 2020).

3. Don't keep quiet about clots

They're common. Discuss any clots with your midwife as they'll want to keep track of what's happening. Save your maternity pads to show your midwife if possible. Passing a lot of large clots can flag up something more serious (NHS, 2021).

4. If you pass a lot of large blood clots or more than a pint of blood in the first 24 hours, talk to a health professional immediately

Passing lots of large blood clots or more than a pint of blood in the first 24 hours after birth are symptoms of primary postpartum haemorrhage (RCOG, 2016).

Severe postnatal blood loss can make you feel even more exhausted than is normal after giving birth but it can also be life threatening. Getting quick treatment is essential before it becomes a major haemorrhage.

Treatment normally involves helping your uterus to contract through massaging the belly, an injection to contract the uterus, and a catheter into your bladder. The doctors will check to make sure all of the placenta has come out, and may have to do this under general anaesthetic. You will also have a drip in your arm and blood taken for tests.

5. The risk factors for primary postpartum haemorrhage

Before labour, risk factors are:

Previous postpartum haemorrhages

A body mass index (BMI) above 35

A twin or triplet pregnancy

Low-lying placenta (placenta previa)

Placenta coming away early (placental abruption)

Pre-eclampsia or high blood pressure

Growths in or around the womb (e.g. fibroids)

Taking blood-thinning medication

Blood clotting problems.

During labour, risk factors are:

6. Think about postpartum bleeding when you pack your hospital bag

Pack maternity pads rather than menstrual pads as they'll be more absorbant and allow the area between the vagina and anus (perineum) to heal with the least irritation. Describing the number of maternity pads you're using also gives your midwife a clear picture of how much blood loss you're experiencing.

7. Lots of things can affect the amount of blood loss

Breastfeeding makes your body release oxytocin. This makes your womb contract so it releases the lochia blood more quickly (but it will be the same amount of blood overall).

Any sort of gentle exercise - even a quick vacuum of the lounge - could also make bleeding heavier. This is especially true in the first two weeks.

Bleeding will tend to be heavier in the morning too. This is because blood pools when you lay down sleeping.

8. It's important to keep an eye on your blood loss in the weeks after giving birth

It's possible to get secondary postpartum haemorrhage, which is abnormal or heavy bleeding between 24 hours and 12 weeks after giving birth. It's often associated with an infection, and sometimes with part of the placenta remaining in the womb (RCOG, 2016).

Symptoms include:

Feeling shaky, feverish, and generally ill.

Having lochia with an offensive smell.

Heavier than expected bleeding, or bleeding that becomes heavier rather than lighter over time. (UHS NHS Foundation Trust, 2015; RCOG, 2016)

If you have any of these symptoms, you should speak to your GP or health visitor immediately (RCOG, 2016). Treatment for an infection includes antibiotics, so remind the health professional if you are breastfeeding so they can select the most appropriate antibiotic.

Severe pain in the womb in the six weeks after birth could be a sign of a serious infection called sepsis, and should be treated with urgency because it can be life-threatening (RCOG, 2012). Other symptoms of sepsis include a high or low temperature, vomiting, diarrhoea, a rash and offensive discharge (RCOG, 2012). If you are experiencing these symptoms, go straight to the emergency department, say that you have recently given birth, and ask if this could be sepsis.

9. It's important to reduce your risk of infection

Wash your hands thoroughly before and after using the toilet and changing your maternity pad (NICE, 2021).

10. Always speak to your GP or health visitor if anything doesn't feel right

In the end, trust your judgement. If you have any worries about your bleeding after you give birth, talk to a health professional. They're there to help.

Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby and general enquiries for parents, members and volunteers: 0300 330 0700.

You might find attending one of our Early Days groups helpful as they give you the opportunity to explore different approaches to important parenting issues with a qualified group leader and other new parents in your area.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activities are happening nearby.

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Bleeding after birth: 10 things you need to know | Life as a parent articles & support | NCT

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It may be one of the few things you haven't discussed with friends. Here's an honest, clear account of what you can expect with bleeding after birth.

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Information to support fathers in the early days.

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Information to support fathers in the early days.

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Tips and exercises to help you get back into shape after birth. Includes advice on diastasis recti (separated stomach muscles), how to ease back pain and safe exercises for the pelvic floor and stomach.

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Whether it's sleep deprivation, money worries, new responsibilities, or the relationship dynamic shifting, dads also have a lot to take on board. This is a huge life change for both parents. On top of this, dads and co-parents might feel guilty about what their partner is going through, knowing they aren't the ones breastfeeding at 3am or healing from labour and birth.

Here's what you need to know about postnatal depression in partners. (Most of the research has been conducted in fathers to date, so while we often refer to dads below, we know it can apply to all types of partners.)

1. Dads and partners can experience depression in the first year after birth

The number of men who become depressed in the first year after becoming a dad is double that of the general population (Davé et al, 2010). Twenty five percent of dads experience mild depressive symptoms (Noorullah et al, 2020) and around 10% to 12% have a diagnosis of depression (Paulson et al, 2010; Philpott and Corcoran, 2018).

First time dads are appear to be more vulnerable to postnatal depression than dads welcoming subsequent children (Fatherhood Institute, 2010).

2. Postnatal depression in men and other partners often goes undiagnosed

The peak time for postnatal depression in men is three to six months after the birth (Fatherhood Institute, 2010).

As with postnatal depression in mums, it often goes undiagnosed. The symptoms can look a lot like the everyday stresses of having a newborn (Musser et al, 2013).

If you have concerns about your own or your partner's mental health, do seek help from your GP who can help you to access support services.

3. Hormonal changes may play a role

Just as with mums, changes in hormones might make postnatal depression in dads more likely (Saxbe et al, 2017).

Hormones including testosterone, oestrogen, cortisol, vasopressin, and prolactin may change in dads during the period after their babies arrive (Kim and Swain, 2007).

4. Postnatal depression in dads and partners is more likely if the mum has depression too

If one of you is experiencing emotional or mental health difficulties, it's more likely that the other is too. Of fathers with depressed partners, a quarter to half may experience depression themselves (Fatherhood Institute, 2010).

5. A range of factors can make dads and partners more likely to get postnatal depression

Dads who are under 25 are more likely to experience postnatal depression than their older counterparts (Davé et al, 2010).

Yet age isn't the only risk factor for postnatal depression in men. Other major risk factors include a history of depression and anxiety, financial pressures, and no longer being in a relationship with the child's mother (Huang and Warner, 2005; Wee et al, 2010; Nazareth, 2011).

Other factors that make postnatal depression in men more likely include: sleeping or crying issues with the baby; drug abuse or dependence; and feeling unsupported by their partners (Huang and Warner, 2005; Fatherhood Institute, 2010; Stadtlander, 2015).

However, the relationship between these factors is unclear so they might not necessarily be the direct cause of mental health difficulties.

6. Postnatal depression in dads and partners can show itself in different ways than in mums

Symptoms can include:

fear, confusion, helplessness and uncertainty about the future

withdrawal from family life, work and social situations

indecisiveness

frustration, irritability, cynicism and anger

marital conflict

partner violence

negative parenting behaviours

alcohol and drug use

physical symptoms like indigestion, changes in appetite and weight, diarrhoea, constipation, headaches, toothaches and nausea.

(Musser et al, 2013; Stadtlander, 2015)

7. Postnatal depression in dads and partners can take its toll on their relationships

Postnatal depression in dads can affect their relationship with the baby's mother (Wee et al, 2011; Demontigny et al, 2013). It can also affect the relationship they have with their child. They may play and engage less with their children and talk more negatively about and to them. They may sing and read less to their children, and may discipline them more harshly (Sethna et al, 2015).

8. Postnatal depression in dads and partners can have an impact on the development of their child

Dads' depression is associated with emotional, social and behavioural problems as well as developmental delay in their children (Fatherhood Institute, 2010).

The association is stronger when a father experiences antenatal as well as postnatal depression, and when his symptoms are particularly severe. There is also a stronger association when the mum also has mental health problems (Stadtlander, 2015).

9. Screening is available

You might associate screening with physical illness but mental health diagnoses are catching up. Men who are concerned about their mental health can use this NHS screening tool (NHS, 2020). Alternatively, if you're concerned, see your GP or call NHS 111.

10. Postnatal depression in dads and partners is treated the same as postnatal depression in mums

The treatment of paternal postnatal depression is in its early stages. Currently, the options for treatment are the same as for mothers with psychotropic medication and/or talking therapies (Nazareth, 2011; NHS, 2018).

Relationship counselling may also be useful (Musser et al, 2013).

Most, importantly share how you're feeling. You're not alone and support is available.
This page was last reviewed in February 2022.
We run Partners in Mind, a peer-to-peer support group for dads and partners in the North West. There are lots of videos and online resources to help you manage your mental health, as well as groups so you can meet and talk to other dads. Take a look at their information page here, email parentsinmindnw@nct.org.uk or follow them on Instagram @nctparentsinmindpartners and on Facebook @NCT Parents in Mind.

Our support line offers practical and emotional support in all areas of pregnancy, birth and early parenthood: 0300 330 0700. We also offer antenatal courses that are a great way for both parents to find out more about birth, labour and life with a new baby.

For information and support, visit Fathers Reaching Out run by Mark Williams, campaigner, speaker and writer.

The Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) is leading a movement against male suicide, the single biggest killer of men under 45 in the UK.

The Hub of Hope is a national mental health database, bringing help and support together in one place, with a focus on grassroots organisation.

ANDYSMANCLUB is a non judgmental, talking group for men.

DadsNet offers support and knowledge through a community of dads on practical parenting and fatherhood.

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Postnatal depression in dads and co-parents: 10 things you should know | Life as a parent articles & support | NCT

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Whether it's sleep deprivation, money worries, new responsibilities, or the relationship dynamic shifting, dads also have a lot to take on board. This is a huge life change for both parents. On top of this, dads and co-parents might feel guilty about what their partner is going through, knowing they aren't the ones breastfeeding at 3am or healing from labour and birth.

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What are the baby blues?

Not just an old wives' tale, the baby blues are real, affecting up to 80% of women after they give birth (NICE, 2014). Women who experience the baby blues can expect to feel down for a little while shortly after having their baby (NHS, 2018a).

What are the symptoms of the baby blues?

If you're going through the baby blues, you might feel:

Symptoms might upset you at the time, but they are relatively mild and will usually pass within 10 to 14 days after the birth (NHS, 2018b). If they hang around, become more severe or include manic symptoms, they could be signs of more serious postnatal illness, such as postnatal psychosis. If so, you should speak to your GP or health visitor about getting some help and support (NICE, 2014).

If you think it might be something more serious, talk to your GP or health visitor.

What causes the baby blues?

The exact cause of the baby blues is not known, but is probably mostly down to the hormones that fall rapidly after birth (Puryear, 2014; Rezaie-Keikhaie et al, 2020).

Lack of sleep and newborn babies go hand in hand, and this is thought to be another factor for the baby blues (Ross et al, 2005).

There's also the huge weight of responsibility that comes with bringing a human into the world. Much as you love your child, it's ok to admit that when you first get home, having a baby can feel seriously overwhelming (MIND, 2020).

How can I reduce the impact of the baby blues?

The good news is that for most women, the symptoms will pass in a few days. In those early days, you can stay tucked up with your baby as much as possible, and feed them very frequently.

In recent years health professionals have started asking you to go to hospital for routine checks, rather than visiting you at home. Consider whether that meets your need to get to know your baby and recover from the birth, and request a home visit if not.

You could ask your family to pop over and help out around the house or chat to a friend about how you're feeling. On the other hand, if it's all getting a bit too much, you could simply ban the visitors for a few days.

Yet if your symptoms don't ease, become severe or you have thoughts of harming yourself or your baby, speak to your midwife, GP, health visitor or emergency healthcare urgently.
This page was last reviewed in January 2022
Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby: 0300 330 0700. We also offer antenatal courses which are a great way to find out more about birth, labour and life with a new baby.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activities are happening nearby.

MIND. (2020) Understanding postnatal depression and perinatal mental health. Available at: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/postnatal-depression-and-perinatal-mental-health/about-maternal-mental-health-problems/ [Accessed 14th January 2022].

NHS. (2018a) Overview - postnatal depression. Available at: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/post-natal-depression/ [Accessed 14th January 2022].

NHS. (2018b) Feeling depressed after childbirth. Available at: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/feeling-depressed-after-birth/ [Accessed 14th January 2022].

NICE. (2014) Antenatal and postnatal mental health. Clinical management and service guidance CG192. Available at: https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg192 [Accessed 14th January 2022].

Puryear LJ. (2014) Postpartum adjustment: what is normal and what is not. In: Barnes DL. (ed) Women's Reproductive Mental Health Across the Lifespan. Switzerland, Springer: 109-122.

Rezaie-Keikhaie K, Arbabshastan ME, Rafiemanesh H, Amirshahi M, Ostadkelayeh SM, Arbabisarjou A. (2020) Systematic review and meta-analysis of the prevalence of the maternity blues in the postpartum period. J Obstet Gynecol Neonatal Nurs. 49(2):127-136. Available at: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32035973/ [Accessed 14th January 2022].

Ross LE, Murray BJ, Steiner M. (2005) Sleep and perinatal mood disorders: a critical review. J Psychiatry Neurosci. 30(4):247-256. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1160560/ [Accessed 14th January 2022].

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The baby blues: what to expect | Life as a parent articles & support | NCT

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You've arrived home with your baby and feel overjoyed but then, out of nowhere, all you can do is cry. Welcome to a very common condition... the baby blues.

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National support organisations for mental health

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National support organisations for mental health

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Action Postpartum Psychosis (APP)
app-network.org
Information and support for anyone who's experienced postpartum psychosis, including a peer support network and an online forum.

Anxiety UK

0844 477 5774
anxietyuk.org.uk

Support, help and information for anyone with an anxiety disorder.

The Association for Post Natal Illness

Provides support to mothers with postnatal depression.

Birth trauma association
birthtraumaassociation.org.uk
Support for women who have experienced traumatic childbirth, and their partners.

The Breastfeeding Network

helpline: 0300 100 0212
breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk

Support and information, including information on drugs and breastfeeding.

Elefriends
elefriends.org.uk
A supportive online community for anyone experiencing a mental health problem.

Family Action
family-action.org.uk
Services for families, including mental health support.

Family Lives

24-hour helpline: 0808 800 2222
familylives.org.uk
Information and support for parents and families.

Fatherhood Institute
fatherhoodinstitute.org
The UK's fatherhood think-tank, providing news, training information, policy updates, research summaries and guides for supporting fathers and their families.

Home-Start

0800 068 63 68
home-start.org.uk
Local support networks for families with young children.

The Lullaby Trust
lullabytrust.org.uk
Information and support for people affected by Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS).

Maternal OCD
maternalocd.org
Information and support for people experiencing perinatal OCD.

The Miscarriage Association
miscarriageassociation.org.uk
Information and support for anyone affected by miscarriage.

Mumsnet
mumsnet.com
Forums about parenting, including parenting and mental health.

The National Association for People Abused in Childhood (NAPAC)

0808 801 0331 (freephone from landline and mobiles)
napac.org.uk
A charity supporting adult survivors of any form of childhood abuse. Provides a support line and local support services.
NCT

NCT is the UK's largest charity for parents. Its website and helpline offer practical and emotional support in all areas of pregnancy, birth and early parenthood.

Netmums
netmums.com
Online parenting organisation helping parents share information and advice.

NHS Choices

Provides information on a wide range of health and social care topics. Also provides an online search tool to find NHS services near you.

No Panic

0844 967 4848 (10am-10pm)
nopanic.org.uk
Provides a helpline, step-by-step programmes, and support for those with anxiety disorders.

OCD Action

0845 390 6232
ocdaction.org.uk

Information and support for people with experience of OCD, and their friends, family and carers.

OCD-UK

A charity run by people with OCD who campaign and can help with local support group information.

PANDAS
pandasfoundation.org.uk
Information and support for anyone experiencing a mental health problem during or after pregnancy.

PND & Me
pndandme.co.uk
Online network connecting people with experience of perinatal mental health problems through twitter.

Sands
sands.org.uk Stillbirth and neonatal death charity, providing information and support for anyone affected by these issues.
Start4Life
nhs.uk/start4life
Information on pregnancy, breastfeeding and parenthood from the NHS.

Tommy's

Support and information on pregnancy, including mental health problems.

This information was published in July 2016. We will revise it in 2019.

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Action Postpartum Psychosis (APP) app-network.org Information and support for anyone who's experienced postpartum psychosis, including a peer support network and an online forum. Anxiety UK 0844 477 5774 anxietyuk.org.uk Support, help and information for anyone with an anxiety disorder. The Association for Post Natal Illness Provides support to mothers with postnatal depression.

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'Mind charity'. Support for mothers and fathers postnatal mental health.

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'Mind charity'. Support for mothers and fathers postnatal mental health.

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How can I manage an existing mental health problem?

If you become pregnant, or are planning to become pregnant, it's important to think about how you can manage your mental health during this time. Whatever your feelings are about being pregnant or becoming a parent, this can be a stressful time for everyone.

Talk to your doctor as soon as possible. They will be able to help you make plans to manage your mental health during pregnancy. See our page on support and services for more information, and our pages on different mental health problems for more information on treatment and support.

I had been diagnosed with PTSD prior to my pregnancy. When I became pregnant with my daughter I had 'crisis' episodes and was referred to a consultant who helped me to identify my triggers.

Infant loss and mental health

Experiencing infant loss (for example, through miscarriage, still birth or sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS)) can be extremely traumatic and can have a big effect on your mental health. You don't have to cope alone, and there is support out there. You can find further information from:

If I became unwell last time I was pregnant, will it happen again?

If you've previously experienced a mental health problem during or directly after pregnancy, then you are at an increased risk of becoming unwell again - but this doesn't mean you definitely will. You might:

feel reluctant or anxious about having another baby

feel more confident about spotting any symptoms, and how to look after yourself

If you do become pregnant again, it's important to talk to your doctor about how you can look after your mental health, and find out about what support you can get. See our pages on support and services and self-care for more information.

This information was published in July 2016. We will revise it in 2019.

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Postnatal depression and perinatal mental health

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If you become pregnant, or are planning to become pregnant, it's important to think about how you can manage your mental health during this time. Whatever your feelings are about being pregnant or becoming a parent, this can be a stressful time for everyone. Talk to your doctor as soon as possible.

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School of Health & Social Care, Swansea University

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This article discusses:
Ups and downs in relationships after having a baby
Decisions about parenting after childbirth
Physical relationships
Communication
Wider relationships
Time together and for yourself
Further information

The change from a couple to a family of three, or possibly more, can be one of the biggest transformations you face when you become a parent.

While there are challenges in bringing up a baby - during the first year in particular - some couples grow stronger as they find a new respect for each other as parents and share experiences that bind them together. It can help to deal with any relationship problems you face after having a baby as they happen.

Ups and downs in relationships after having a baby

One of the biggest factors leading to tension and issues in relationships after childbirth is tiredness. Lack of sleep can have a huge impact on day-to-day life and it's useful to consider options for managing this. For example, when sleep deprivation kicks in, one parent may need to take some time sleeping in another room to catch up.

New parents are often short of time too. The hours previously used for socialising, relaxing and domestic tasks can be sharply reduced, and this can change the dynamics of a relationship.

Money - or lack of it - can also be a cause of stress for couples. For many new parents, adjusting to life on a reduced income or one salary can be especially challenging. Often, there are emotional issues underpinning money rows, such as the loss of financial independence or feeling the pressure of having to provide for the family.

One partner may also be adjusting to life at home with a baby rather than being at work. It can help to recognise the underlying issues fuelling the tension and try to address that.

One, two, three

With a first baby, the arrival can mean that two people who were the most important ones in each other's lives now have a third (or more with twins or multiples) very important person to think about. Some parents find this transition difficult, struggling with the fact they are no longer at the forefront of their partner's mind.

Partners can feel sidelined as mum concentrates on their child. Equally, some women may feel like they disappear as everyone focusses on the new baby. Mum may feel that her role is to simply care and feed rather than be a partner or person in her own right.

It's important to acknowledge how roles might change and how this can make both parents feel. It's also helpful to talk through each other's day together to find out what's been positive or challenging and gain an understanding of the other's day.

Decisions about parenting after childbirth

Some parents find that they have different views on parenting which can cause conflict. It can be easy for one parent to become the 'expert' and undermine the other's confidence.

It helps to discuss each other's views and try to develop a joint approach. Accepting that you may have different ways of looking after your baby is also important. Just because you do things differently doesn't mean that one way is right or wrong.

Physical relationships

The physical side of a relationship can also change dramatically - thanks to exhaustion, dealing with the physical and emotional impact of the birth, and the demands of life with a newborn. It can take time to feel like having sex again after birth.

A positive approach is patience, a sense of humour, understanding, and a willingness to find new ways of expressing physical affection until you both feel ready to have sex again.

Communication

Open and honest communication is vital in any relationship - and especially for new parents.

If there is tension:

Make time to talk when you're both feeling calm.

Listen and try to understand your partner's perspective.

Avoid criticism or blame.

Postnatal depression (PND) can affect both mums and dads - and have a big impact on relationships. If you think that you or your partner is suffering from depression, then supporting each other and finding help is really important.

Wider relationships

The birth of a baby may bring some relationships with friends and family closer than you expect, and others may become more distant or challenging.

Many parents find friends and family will offer advice and opinions - sometimes unasked for and sometimes in conflict with your own parenting ideas. If you disagree with the advice being offered, it can help to focus on the fact that it is usually well meaning and that it's up to you to decide whether to take onboard the advice given.

For many parents the support that may be offered by grandparents, other relations, friends and even neighbours can be invaluable. Social support can be hugely beneficial to a parent's emotional well-being in the postnatal period so don't be afraid to ask for or accept help.

Time together and for yourself

Looking after yourselves as a couple and as individuals is important. It may be simplistic but if you are happy you are more likely to be happy in your role as a parent too.

Make time for yourselves as a couple - maybe try to fit or adapt some of the things you used to enjoy together into your new life, such as watching a DVD or having a takeaway.

Take some time out with friends or on your own, doing something you enjoy or find relaxing.

Remember that help is available - whether it's from NCT or your own social and family networks.

It will be a learning curve in the first few weeks and months, but with the right support, you can work it out together.

Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby and general enquiries for parents, members and volunteers: 0300 330 0700.

You might find attending one of NCT's Early Days groups helpful as they give you the opportunity to explore different approaches to important parenting issues with a qualified group leader and other new parents in your area.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activities are happening nearby.

Relate, a charity which specialises in supporting relationships, has information on coping with a new baby.

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Changes in your relationships after having a baby

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This article discusses: Ups and downs in relationships after having a baby Decisions about parenting after childbirth Physical relationships Communication Wider relationships Time together and for yourself Further information The change from a couple to a family of three, or possibly more, can be one of the biggest transformations you face when you become a parent.

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What to do if your partner is suffering PND

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What to do if your partner is suffering PND

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Give it time: a guide to coping with crying

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Give it time: a guide to coping with crying

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When babies cry they are trying to tell you something. Here are some tips that might help to soothe your baby.

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To view the Baby Brain Map, please visit this page on a browser and device that supports Adobe Flash Player.
To get started, select an age range from the pull-down menu and click on it. Depending on the age range, different hotspots on the brain will appear. Click on a hotspot to reveal questions to find out how a baby's brain develops during this period of brain growth. You'll also learn what you can do to enrich a very young child's development.

Don't forget to click on the questions to display the answers.

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To view the Baby Brain Map, please visit this page on a browser and device that supports Adobe Flash Player. To get started, select an age range from the pull-down menu and click on it. Depending on the age range, different hotspots on the brain will appear.

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If you’re worried your baby is unwell, our free Baby Check app helps you decide whether they need to see a health professional or not…

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You've checked everything and all is as it should be. You've tried all your soothing methods (and other people's) and your baby is still upset.

If you just simply cannot work out why they're crying, it could be colic. It could also be the Period of PURPLE Crying - developmental crying in healthy babies, which is often mistaken for colic (NCSBS, 2018).

Only 11% of babies get true colic in their first six weeks, and this drops to 0.6% of babies by 10 to 12 weeks (Wolke et al, 2017). Knowing what to look for and how to help your baby through colic can make everyone feel a little less desperate.

What is colic?

The medical definition of colic (or infantile colic) is repeated episodes of excessive and inconsolable crying in an infant that otherwise appears to be healthy and thriving (NICE, 2017; Patient, 2018). These episodes last for more than three hours a day, for more than three days a week, for at least one week (NICE, 2017).

"Colic is most common in babies from a few weeks old to around four months of age, but it can still happen up to six months."

There are no long-term effects. Beyond coping with the crying, there's nothing to worry about.

What causes colic?

There's no definitive cause of colic. Although it might be caused by abdominal pains, changes in hormone levels in the gut, food intolerance, trapped wind or sensitivity to milk protein (Patient, 2018). Yet this is only relevant to 5% to 10% of babies (Hogg, 2015). Others think it's just the extreme end of crying, while others say it is evolution making sure babies always have an adult around to protect them (Batlivala, 2017).

Some parents can be so desperate to have a cause for their baby's crying, they'll assume it's the result of a treatable medical condition or digestive problem (i.e. colic) (Hogg, 2015).

What are the symptoms of colic?

Each baby behaves in a completely unique way, but colic is usually characterised by all or some of the following:

Crying for more than three and a half hours a day .

Crying that's inconsolable and almost continuous - this can be intense and sound different from your baby's other cries.

The crying reaches a peak in the late afternoon and early evening.

Their face becomes red and flushed.

They clench their fists, bringing their legs up to their tummy or arch their back.

(Wolke et al, 2017; Patient, 2018)

If you're worried it might be something more serious than colic, visit your GP or talk to your health visitor. This way you can rule out any illness.

What to do if your baby has colic

Unfortunately, there's no cure for colic and each baby responds differently to attempts to soothe them (Patient, 2018). But here we've put together some of the more common methods that people say might help soothe a baby with colic.

Positions:

Holding your baby, wrapping them snugly in a blanket or putting them in a baby sling.

Holding your baby in different positions, such as on your shoulder, cradled in your arms, or lying with their tummy faced down along your forearm.

Swaddling: some people say swaddling their baby - wrapping them snugly in a blanket - can make them feel safe and secure.

Gently swaying your baby.

Sitting or holding your baby upright during feeding, to prevent them swallowing air.

Burping your baby after feeds or gently bringing their legs into their tummy.

(NHS, 2018; Patient, 2018)

Feeding and supplements:

Some people say using a fast-flow teat if you're bottle-feeding helps your baby to not swallow air.

Burping your baby after feeds.

Do not change your baby's formula unless your GP or health visitor advises this.

Anti-colic drops or supplements are not recommended as there's insufficient evidence they work.

(NHS, 2018; Patient, 2018)

Surroundings:

Some people say avoiding overstimulating your baby by repeatedly picking them up and putting them down can help. Gently comforting your baby in a quiet, darkened room might be better.

Pushing them around in their pram or driving - babies like movement.

Using white noise: a washing machine, vacuum cleaner or radio static will do the job.

Gently rubbing their stomach or back or giving them a warm bath.

(NHS, 2018; Patient, 2018; Sezici et al, 2018)

Your diet if you're breastfeeding:

It's not recommended that you change your diet if you're breastfeeding (NHS, 2018). Yet some women find drinking too many caffeinated drinks, eating spicy food and alcohol can aggravate colic.

When to seek medical advice

If your baby is displaying any of the following symptoms, get medical help straight away:

has a weak, high-pitched, or continuous cry

seems floppy when you pick them up

isn't feeding

vomits green fluid

has blood in their poo

has a fever of 38°C or above (if they're less than three months old) or 39°C or above (if they're three to six months old)

has a bulging fontanelle (the soft spot at the top of a baby's head)

has a fit (seizure)

turns blue, blotchy, or very pale

has breathing problems, such as breathing quickly or grunting while breathing.

Keeping yourself calm through excessive crying

Trying and failing to soothe a baby who is crying inconsolably can be very stressful. It's important to remember your baby's colic is not your fault and you're not a bad parent because you can't get them to stop crying.

If you're feeling stressed, we suggest you check out our article about how to cope and keep calm when looking after your baby. You could also try out one of the many free meditation apps to help you feel more calm.

If you're becoming overwhelmed or feel like you can't cope, it's OK to put your baby somewhere safe and have 10 minutes of time out. Make sure you're asking loved ones for support and don't hesitate to reach out for help. A support line like that NCT offers on 0333 252 5051 can also provide help and advice to parents with babies that cry excessively.

Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby and general enquiries for parents, members and volunteers: 0333 252 5051.

You might find attending one of our Early Days groups helpful as they give you the opportunity to explore different approaches to important parenting issues with a qualified group leader and other new parents in your area.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activities are happening nearby.

Watch our coping with crying film.

The Purple Crying website looks in detail at the stage in your baby's life when they cry more than at any other time.

Understanding childhood also have a range of resources available online and to download, developed by child psychotherapists, including a leaflet on crying.

There's also useful information on the NHS website.

The NSPCC helpline provides help and support to thousands of parents and families.

The Lullaby Trust has lots of useful information and support for parents about safe sleep.

Alexander CP, Zhu J, Paul IM, Kjerulff KH. (2017) Fathers make a difference: positive relationships with mother and baby in relation to infant colic. Child Care Health Dev. 43(5):687-696. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28271578 [Accessed 2nd October 2018]

Arikan D, Alp H, Gözüm S, Orbak Z, Cifçi EK. (2008) Effectiveness of massage, sucrose solution, herbal tea or hydrolysed formula in the treatment of infantile colic. J Clin Nurs. 17(13):1754-1761. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18592627 [Accessed 2nd October 2018]

Batlivala SP. (2017) Colic: an evolutionary selective pressure for good parents? Clin Pediatr (Phila). 56(8):705-706. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28589761 [Accessed 2nd October 2018]

Hogg S. (2015) Understanding and responding to excessive crying. Int J Birth Parent Education. 2(4):7-11. Available at: https://ijbpe.com/images/IJBPE/pdf/vol2iss4/IJBPEcol2iss4_understandingandrespondingtoexcessivecrying.pdf [Accessed 2nd October 2018]

NCSBS. (2018) What is the period of PURPLE crying? Available at: http://www.purplecrying.info/what-is-the-period-of-purple-crying.php [accessed 18th October 2018].

NHS. (2015) Colic. Available at: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/colic/ [accessed 18th October 2018].

NICE. (2017) Clinical Knowledge Summaries. Colic - infantile. Available at: https://cks.nice.org.uk/colic-infantile [accessed 18th October 2018].

Patient. (2018) Baby colic. Available at: https://patient.info/health/baby-colic-leaflet [accessed 18th October 2018]

Sezici E, Yigit D. (2018) Comparison between swinging and playing of white noise among colicky babies: A paired randomised controlled trial. J Clin Nurs. 27(3-4):593-600. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28618052 [Accessed 2nd October 2018]

Wolke D, Bilgin A, Samara M. (2017) Systematic review and meta-analysis: fussing and crying durations and prevalence of colic in infants. J Pediatr. 185:55-61.e4. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28385295 [Accessed 2nd October 2018]

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My baby won't stop crying - coping with colic symptoms | Baby & toddler articles & support | NCT

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You've checked everything and all is as it should be. You've tried all your soothing methods (and other people's) and your baby is still upset. If you just simply cannot work out why they're crying, it could be colic.

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What you can do to support your baby's development

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How to change a nappy

Babies need frequent nappy changes, but how often they need changing depends on how sensitive their skin is.

Some babies have very delicate skin and need changing as soon as they wet themselves, otherwise their skin becomes sore and red.

Other babies can wait to be changed until before or after every feed.

All babies need changing as soon as possible when they have done a poo (stool) to prevent nappy rash.

Young babies need changing as many as 10 or 12 times a day, while older babies need to be changed at least 6 to 8 times.

What you need for nappy changing

Before you change your baby's nappy, wash your hands and get everything you need in one place, including:

a changing mat or towel

cotton wool and a bowl of warm water, or fragrance and alcohol-free baby wipes

a plastic bag or bucket for the dirty nappy and dirty cotton wool or wipes

barrier cream to protect your baby's skin

a clean nappy (and liner and cover if you're using cloth nappies)

clean clothes

Where to change a nappy

The best place to change a nappy is on a changing mat or towel on the floor, particularly if you have more than one baby.

That way, if you need to see to another child for a moment, your baby can't fall. It's best done sitting down so you don't hurt your back.

If you're using a changing table, keep an eye on your baby at all times. You shouldn't rely on the straps to keep your baby secure. Never walk away or turn your back.

Older babies may try to wriggle away when you're changing them. You could give them a toy or use a mobile to distract them.

Changing a nappy

It's just as important to clean your baby fully whether they have wet themselves or done a poo.

If your baby's nappy is dirty, use the nappy to clean off most of the poo from their bottom.

Then use the cotton wool and plain warm water (or baby wipes) to remove the rest and get your baby really clean.

Clean the whole nappy area gently but thoroughly and make sure you clean inside the folds of skin.

Girls should be cleaned from front to back to avoid getting germs into their vagina.

Boys should be cleaned around the testicles (balls) and penis, but there's no need to pull back their foreskin.

If it's warm enough, let your baby lie on the changing mat without a nappy on for a while. Wearing a nappy all the time makes nappy rash more likely.

If you're using disposable nappies, take care not to get water or cream on the sticky tabs as they won't stick if you do.

If you're using cloth nappies, put in a nappy liner and then fasten the nappy. Adjust it to fit snugly round the waist and legs.

Chat to your baby while you're changing them. Pulling faces, smiling and laughing with your baby will help you bond and help their development.

Try not to show any disgust at what's in their nappy. You don't want your baby to learn that doing a poo is something unpleasant or negative.

Nappy hygiene

Disposable nappies can be rolled up and resealed using the tabs. Put them in a plastic bag kept only for nappies, then tie it up and put it in an outside bin.

Washable cloth nappies don't have to be soaked before they're washed, but you may choose to soak them to help get the stains off. Check the washing instructions first.

Cloth nappies can be machine washed at 60C, or you could use a local nappy laundry service.

There's no evidence that using washing powders with enzymes (bio powders) or fabric conditioners will irritate your baby's skin.

Wash nappies that are dirty with poo separately from your other washing. You'll probably have enough nappies to make up a full load anyway.

To avoid infection, wash your hands after changing a nappy before you do anything else.

If your baby's old enough, they can wash their hands with you as it's a good habit to get into.
Learn how to wash your hands properly

What baby poo looks like

Your baby's first poo is called meconium. This is sticky and greenish-black.

Some babies may do this kind of poo during or after birth, or some time in the first 48 hours.

After a few days the poo will change to a yellow or mustard colour. Breastfed babies' poo is runny and doesn't smell. Formula-fed babies' poo is firmer, darker brown and more smelly.

Some infant formulas can also make your baby's poo dark green. If you change from breast to formula feeding, you'll find your baby's poos become darker and more paste-like.

If you have a girl, you may see a white discharge on her nappy for a few days after birth.

It's caused by hormones that have crossed the placenta to your baby, but these will soon disappear from her system.

These hormones can occasionally cause slight bleeding like a mini period, but in both cases it's nothing to worry about.

Read the NCT guide to newborn baby poo to find out more.

How often should my baby do a poo?

Babies do an average of 4 poos a day in the first week of life. This goes down to an average of 2 a day by the time they're 1 year old.

Newborn babies who are breastfed may poo at each feed in the early weeks, then, after about 6 weeks, not have a poo for several days.

Formula-fed babies may poo up to 5 times a day when newborn, but after a few months this can go down to once a day.

It's also normal for babies to strain or even cry when doing a poo.

Your baby isn't constipated as long as their poos are soft, even if they haven't done one for a few days.

Is it normal for my baby's poos to change?

From day to day or week to week, your baby's poos will probably vary.

If you notice a definite change of any kind, such as the poos becoming very smelly, very watery or harder (particularly if there's blood in them), you should talk to your doctor or health visitor.

If your baby's poos look pale, this can be a sign of liver disease.

Speak to your health visitor or GP if you notice this.

Disposable and washable cloth (reusable) nappies

Disposable and cloth nappies come in a range of shapes and sizes. The choice might be confusing at first, but with trial and error you'll be able to work out which nappies suit your baby best as they grow.

Disposable and cloth nappies have different pros and cons, so you'll need to consider things like cost, convenience and the impact on the environment when you choose what to buy.

For example, disposable nappies are very handy, but washable cloth nappies work out cheaper if you add up the costs over the years your baby's in nappies.

Some cloth nappy brands and local councils offer free samples for you to try out.

If you use cloth nappies, you may want to sign up to a nappy laundry service that'll take away the dirty nappies and deliver a fresh batch each week.

Which? has more information to help you decide which type of nappy is best for your baby, budget and lifestyle.

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Babies need frequent nappy changes, but how often they need changing depends on how sensitive their skin is. Some babies have very delicate skin and need changing as soon as they wet themselves, otherwise their skin becomes sore and red. Other babies can wait to be changed until before or after every feed.

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Links to support organisations for partners mental health.

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Links to support organisations for partners mental health.

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You might wonder why babies need extra protection or any immunisations in the first place. It's because before they're born, babies receive antibodies against infections from the placenta. This gives your newborn immediate but short-lived protection. This is a type of natural immunity called passive immunity (Baxter, 2007).

After several weeks to three or four months (at most) that passive immunity wears off so your baby is not protected from infections. That means your baby will need active immunisation through vaccinations. This is where the immunisations programme comes in.

Whether you're all for the vaccinations modern medicine has brought us or not, they have made formerly common childhood diseases rare (CDC, 2018). And the decision to vaccinate or not can make a difference. In August 2019, England lost its 'measles-free' status with the World Health Organization. This is due to 231 confirmed cases of measles in the first three months of 2019 (New Scientist, 2019). Experts are pointing to 'sub-optimal' take-up of MMR for this (Gov.uk, 2019).

Here's what you need to know about vaccinations and baby immunisations.

Your child's schedule of baby immunisations

Every baby and child in the UK is offered a schedule of routine immunisations starting from when they're two months old. The Department of Health, Public Health England and NHS England all recommend these immunisations to help protect your baby from what would otherwise be common childhood diseases.

In some areas, your baby will be offered a BCG tuberculosis (TB) vaccination in the first day or so. This will also be the case if your baby has family members visiting from countries that have high rates of TB (NHS, 2019a).

It is important that your baby gets immunised at the right age, as this will help to keep the risk of your child catching a serious disease as low as possible. Premature babies might be at greater risk of infection so immunisations are particularly important for them (NHS, 2015).

You'll be given a personal child health record (PCHR) that's called a 'red book'. It's called that because the cover is usually red and it's for recording your child's health. It contains details of the fairly rigid schedule to follow for immunisations. Your baby's GP might also send you reminders for when their immunisations are due.

Your baby will be protected sooner if they keep to the schedule for their immunisations. If something does happen to delay or interrupt the schedule, they can pick it up again at any time. Although something to be aware of is that delays to some immunisations can slightly change the schedule (Patient, 2018).

Here's what the current schedule for immunisations in the UK looks like.

At two months (eight weeks)

6-in-one vaccine (DTaP/IPV/Hib/HepB) - this provides protection for following vaccines: diptheria, tetanus, pertussis (whooping cough), polio, Haemophilus influenzae type b (Hib) and hepatitis B.

Pneumococcal or pneumo jab (PCV) - this provides protection against some types of pneumococcal infection.

Men B vaccine - this provides protection against meningitis (caused by meningococcal type B bacteria).

Rotavirus - this jab provides protection against rotavirus infection, a common cause of childhood diarrhoea and sickness.

(GOV.UK 2018, NHS, 2016a)

At three months (twelve weeks)

6-in-one vaccine (DTaP/IPV/Hib/HepB) (second dose)

Rotavirus (second dose)

(GOV.UK 2018, NHS, 2016a)

At four months (sixteen weeks)

6-in-one vaccine (DTaP/IPV/Hib/HepB) (third dose)

Pneumococcal (PCV) (second dose)

Men B (second dose)

(GOV.UK 2018, NHS, 2016a)

One year old (on or after the child's first birthday)

Hib and MenC (Hib/MenC): this jab is given as a single dose and provides protection against Meningitis C (first dose) and HiB (fourth dose)

Pneumococcal (PCV) (third dose)

Men B (third dose)

Measles, mumps and rubella (German measles) (MMR): this jab is given as a single dose and provides protection against measles, mumps and rubella.

(GOV.UK 2018, NHS, 2016a)

At two years old (and older)

Influenza (available each year from September) (GOV.UK 2018, NHS, 2016a).

Risks and myths about baby immunisations

Some parents decide not to vaccinate their babies because of concerns about the potential side effects they might cause. Yet it's important to balance the benefits of having a vaccine against the chances of harm.

Risks

While every medicine has side effects, vaccines are among the safest of medicines. The majority of side effects that vaccinations cause are mild and don't last long (NHS, 2016b).

Common side effects of vaccinations in babies include redness or swelling around the injection site, and a slight temperature that normally disappears within a couple of days. Extremely rare side effects (less than one in a million) include anaphylactic reaction, which needs to be treated promptly to reduce its dangerous symptoms (NHS, 2016b).

Myths

You might be worried about links between vaccinations and other health conditions. Be aware that lots of anti-vaccine stories are spread online and they're not based on scientific evidence. For example, you might have read about a link between the MMR vaccination and autism but a lot of good-quality research has found no evidence that any link exists (NHS, 2014; Taylor et al, 2014; Hviid et al, 2019; NHS, 2019b).

If you have any concerns, do have a chat with your GP or health visitor to make sure you're making your decision based on reliable information.

Breastfeeding and immunity

Breastfeeding gives babies some passive protection from infection mostly through antibodies in breastmilk. The protection against infections seems to improve the longer babies are breastfed. Yet this passive immunity is temporary and the same vaccination schedule is recommended however you feed your baby.

Breastfeeding also seems to be able to stimulate a baby's immune system. Some studies show breastfeeding might even increase a baby's responses to vaccines (Hanson, 1999).

Premature babies and immunisations

Premature babies are at a higher risk of infection. It's important that they are immunised following the routine immunisation schedule starting from when they're two months old, regardless of how early they were born. It could be possible that they start their immunisation when they are still at hospital but your doctor will be able to advise you on this (NHS, 2015).

Protecting your child

If you decide not to vaccinate your baby, they are at risk of catching a range of potentially disabling or fatal diseases like meningitis or measles (NHS, 2016b). Unfortunately, these diseases have not vanished but the vaccinations modern medicine has brought us can lower the risks of outbreaks happening and protect your child from them (CDC, 2018).
This page was last reviewed in August 2019.
Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby and general enquiries for parents, members and volunteers: 0300 330 0700.

You might find attending one of NCT's Early Days groups helpful as they give you the opportunity to explore different approaches to important parenting issues with a qualified group leader and other new parents in your area.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activitie s are happening nearby.

Further information on immunisation for children can be found at NHS Choices.

Healthtalkonline.org, shares people's experiences of health and illness based on qualitative research, posts a wide range of information on immunisation.

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You might wonder why babies need extra protection or any immunisations in the first place. It's because before they're born, babies receive antibodies against infections from the placenta. This gives your newborn immediate but short-lived protection. This is a type of natural immunity called passive immunity (Baxter, 2007).

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Newborn baby poo in nappies: what to expect | Baby & toddler articles & support | NCT

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Your baby’s nappy can tell you a lot - find out more here.

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As soon as you know there is a baby on the way, you and your family will begin to prepare yourselves for the changes ahead. Your cat will also need to be prepared for the new arrival, as there will be alterations to the home environment and routine once the baby comes into the house.

Prepare your cat for your baby's arrival early

As soon as you know there is a baby on the way, you and your family will begin to prepare yourselves for the changes ahead. Your cat will also need to be prepared for the new arrival, as there will be alterations to the home environment and routine once the baby comes into the house. With a little forward planning, you can get your pets used to the changes well in advance, so that your cat should hardly notice any difference when the baby actually arrives.

You should start to make preparations four months in advance of the birth - do not leave it until the baby has arrived. The whole family can enjoy the benefits that having a cat can bring by following the advice in this leaflet.

Before the baby is born

Handling your cat

All cats are different when it comes to handling - some are happy to be touched all over, whereas others may only enjoy being stroked on their head or shoulders. It's common for most cats to be sensitive around their stomach area and tail. If your cat doesn't like being touched in certain areas, you will have to be mindful of this when your baby becomes more mobile, as babies can 'grab' in their enthusiasm to want to touch and stroke, which can easily upset your cat.

Avoid playing games that involve your hands, however tempting! Even if your cat is gentle when playing, it's always best to use toys instead, as you don't want your cat to favour fingers or hands, especially when your baby arrives.

Getting your cat used to baby sounds

To help prepare your cat for the sounds that babies make, play recordings of a baby crying, gurgling and screaming for short periods during the day. Initially the sound should be barely audible, increasing the volume gradually as your cat grows accustomed to the noises. It's important that your cat feels calm and relaxed with the sounds before you increase the volume, so remember to take this slowly.

Getting your cat used to baby smells and objects

A cat's primary sense is smell, so new products and objects bought into the house can be a particularly challenging and threatening time for them. Get your cat used to baby powder, soaps, shampoos and baby milk by using them in the months leading up to your baby's arrival. It is also a good idea to put some of the new products on your own skin (eg powder, baby lotion) - this way the new smells can mingle with a familiar 'safe' smell, which is likely to be less of a concern for your cat. Playpens, cots, pushchairs, highchairs and changing mats should be in place before the baby arrives.

To make the new objects smell more familiar (and therefore less threatening) wipe a soft cloth over your cat's head and then using the same area of the cloth, wipe the new baby items. You may wish to install a Feliway diffuser (available from your vet), which is a synthetic version of the facial pheromones produced by the glands on your cat's face -this can help your cat feel more secure during this potentially stressful time.

Feed your cat where a baby can't reach

When your baby begins to toddle and explore, cat food may prove an irresistible attraction so accustom your cat to eating in an area, preferably off the ground, where your child won't be able to reach.

You are likely to have lots of visitors when your new baby arrives, including family, friends and health visitors. Some sociable cats may enjoy the extra attention that they get from visitors, whereas others may become overwhelmed if it is something they are not used to.

Cats should always have a quiet, safe place to go to whenever they need to rest or retreat from visitors. This will be especially important to them once the baby arrives and eventually begins to toddle about. Cats prefer high, dark, secluded places that have a good view of the household activities. A tall scratching post with extra tiers or a high shelf is ideal for this, as your cat will be able to get used to what's going on at a safe distance. Encourage your cat to use these areas by placing a few tasty treats and bedding on them. If your cat is on the nervous side, it's a good idea to ask your visitors to ignore your cat when they are in their "safe" place.

Separate baby and cat toys

Cat toys and baby toys are often made of similar materials. Some toys even make the same kind of noise, such as a squeak or rattle. It's not surprising then that babies will pick up and chew the cat's toys. Tidy them away, but remember to bring them out and play with your cat throughout the day.

Resting and sleeping places

You should decide if you will need to change where your cat currently rests and sleeps. For example, the spare room where your cat usually has free access may become the nursery. Gradually encourage your cat to sleep in other areas and then keep the nursery door closed. Make this and other changes well in advance so your cat,does not associate the change with the arrival of the baby.

Make sure that your cat is in good physical health. Your cat should also be free from fleas and worms. Any suspicions about illness or developing ailments should be checked out by a qualified vet. Any pain or irritation that a cat is feeling will lower their tolerance to the changes that are about to happen, which may lead to spraying or aggression.

How will your pet react to your new baby?

If your pet has already experienced the arrival of a new baby, and has coped well, you should not have too many problems. However, if this is the first time your pet will be living with a new baby, ask yourself the following questions. Once the baby comes, will you want to exclude your cat from certain areas of the house? Does your pet have any behavioural problems? If so, they may get worse once a baby has arrived. You should contact your vet for a referral to a pet behaviour counsellor if you need help.

If you are happy with your cat's behaviour, then you can proceed with the general advice given in this leaflet.

After the baby is born

Introducing your cat to your baby

The baby should be introduced in a quiet room where the cat has few associations - not a place where the cat usually sleeps or eats. Hold the baby in your arms and allow your cat to sniff them. Reward your cat's calm behaviour with gentle praise and tasty titbits. The cat will appear interested for a few seconds and will then lose interest. If your cat prefers to run away from the baby, that's fine. Forcing your cat to interact with the baby could be very stressful. Allow your cat to escape and investigate in their own time. Carry on with the normal daily duties and routine and your cat should readily accept the new arrival.

Hygiene, cats and babies

Due to hygiene concerns, people who do not have pets of their own may try and encourage you to rehome your cat. It's essential that your cat is treated for worms and fleas regularly, using products from your vet.

Don't leave dirty nappies on the floor, as they can cause the cat to wet or mess on that spot. Use antibacterial soap to clean your hands after feeding, grooming or playing with your cat and always wear rubber gloves, which are washed afterwards, to clean your cat's litter tray.

Supervise your baby around your cat

Don't put your baby on the floor with the cat and never leave your cat unsupervised with a baby. This includes all cats, even those with an excellent temperament. Using a screen door for the baby's nursery allows you to keep the door shut, but still see and hear the baby. You might also want to think about using a cot and pram net to prevent your cat from investigating the sleeping baby.

Toddlers and cats

Your baby will soon start crawling and toddling and it's important to remain vigilant once they begin to move about. It's especially important to make sure that your cat has a safe place to rest and relax, which is inaccessible to the toddler. This will avoid the situation where the cat is continually followed, cornered and pestered by the infant. Finally, remember to place your cat's litter tray in a quiet area away from areas your infant has access to.

Additional information

Blue Cross also produces a range of leaflets, which offer guidance about a whole range of animals and issues. Ones that you may find of particular interest are:

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As soon as you know there is a baby on the way, you and your family will begin to prepare yourselves for the changes ahead. Your cat will also need to be prepared for the new arrival, as there will be alterations to the home environment and routine once the baby comes into the house.

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You won't need to bath your baby in the early days because you will probably be giving them a top and tail wash. But when you do start to bath your newborn baby, it can be a lovely experience although it may feel stressful at first. Some babies take to baths well and others don't seem to like them.

"Your little one may really enjoy their first bath. But don't worry if they don't like it straight away."

Most babies grow to enjoy bath time as they get more familiar with the experience.

You might find it helpful to watch this video from the NHS about how to bath your baby.

Safety tips for bath time

It's important to keep safety in mind at bath time. Babies and young children should never be left unattended in a bath, not even for a second (NHS, 2021). Here are some bath time tips:

Get everything ready ahead of your baby's bath, so you have everything you need to hand.

Make sure you always use the hot and cold taps at the same time when you run the bath.

Check the bath water temperature first before putting your baby in. The standard way to check is to put your elbow in the water because your hand can cope with high temperatures. The water should feel neither warmer or colder than your elbow.

Don't be distracted away by another child, a phone call or doorbell. What feels like a couple of seconds can turn into a minute or two. Leaving your little one even for a few moments could be enough time for them to seriously hurt themselves or drown.

If you forget anything - ask your partner or another family member to grab it for you. Or take your baby with you to get what you need. (NHS, 2021)

"Never leave your baby alone in the bath, not even for a second (NHS, 2021)."

When should I give my baby a bath?

There is no set age when you should give your baby a bath. Babies get cold quickly, and that's more risky for them than being a bit dirty.

If you're anxious about bathing your little one, you don't need to put them into a bath until you feel confident about it.

You may prefer to just wash your little one's face and bottom to begin with. This is sometimes called 'topping and tailing'.

If you're feeling confident about bathing your baby you can do so when you wish.

Choose a bath time when your little one is content and awake. It's better not to bathe your baby straight after a feed or when they're hungry or tired.

Some babies love bath time to begin with, others don't. You may need to try different ways of bathing your baby and at different times of day, to find out what suits you both. Choose a time of day when your baby is happy and awake (NHS, 2021).

How often can I give my baby a bath?

Your little one won't need a bath every day but if they enjoy it, there's no reason why you can't.

If you'd prefer to top and tail your newborn, you can do this every day or every few days or as needed.

Every baby is different - you will soon find out what works best for you and your little one.

How do I wash my baby?

If you want to top and tail your newborn, you can do this by washing them using cotton wool or a soft cloth and bowls of warm water. Warm tap water is probably fine but if you want to be particularly careful, use cooled boiled water to reduce the chance of infections in the first week or until your baby's cord drops off.

You can wash your newborn in a small baby bath.

If you'd prefer to share a bath with your little one, see below for more details.

It can help to have an extra pair of hands at bath time, if available, until you feel confident about bathing your baby on your own.

You don't need any special products to bathe your baby; only mild, non-perfumed soap can be used where needed. Plain water is best for your baby's skin during in the first month (NHS, 2021).

To find out more about caring for your newborn baby's umbilical cord, see our article on topping and tailing.

Can I take a bath with my baby?

Babies love to lie on a parent's chest in the bath.

Having a bath with your baby can help you both relax and encourage breastfeeding.

Remember, your baby might have a wee or poo while in the bath with you!

Baths are slippery, so it's not a good idea to get into or out of a bath carrying your baby. It's better to bath with your baby when there's someone else to hand them to you and take them from you. This could be your partner, your parent or a friend.

Tips for co-bathing

Get yourself settled and relaxed in the bath. Check the temperature is not too hot with your elbow.

Ask your partner, parent or friend to pass you your baby and lay them on your legs facing you.

Now you can lower as much of them into the water as you and they want by straightening your legs.

You might want to chat or sing to your baby to help soothe them.

Remember that your baby will get cold more quickly than you.

When you want to get out, make sure you pass your baby back to your helper before getting out yourself.

As your little one gets more used to bath time and you become more confident handling them, bathing with your baby becomes lots more fun.
This page was last reviewed in November 2021.
Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby and general enquiries for parents, members and volunteers: 0300 330 0700.

You might find attending one of our Early Days groups helpful as they give you the opportunity to explore different approaches to important parenting issues with a qualified group leader and other new parents in your area.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activities are happening nearby.

NHS Choices Birth to Five section.

Public Health England (PHE) provides guidelines about bathing children under two safely.

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Bathing your baby | Baby & toddler articles & support | NCT

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We discuss when to give your baby a bath, ways you can wash your little one and tips to help keep them safe at bath time.

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How to use them safely.

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What is a sling, wrap or carrier?

A sling, wrap or carrier is what you use to carry your child on your body, it's commonly called babywearing. It's not a new phenomenon and has been practised for centuries in different cultures. We'll use the terms sling, wrap and carrier interchangeably in the rest of this article.

There are lots of types of slings so it's worth finding out about the different styles, and even trying a few before you buy one. Read our article Which baby carrier, wrap or sling is best for me? to find out more.

Are there are any benefits to using a sling?

Many parents say it's practical, whatever your lifestyle. Try tidying up or getting lunch ready for your toddler with your newborn in a baby carrier or baby sling. You'll probably see what they mean.

Slings help with transportation but they can also help parents and babies to bond and stay active while navigating the changes of new parenthood (Whittle, 2019; Williams and Turner, 2020). Younger parents' relationships with their baby have benefited from babywearing (Williams and Turner, 2020). Parents of multiple babies may find it easier to manage if one baby is held in a sling, and some use a sling for each baby. Parents who are wheelchair users or have limited arm capacity may find it an accessible way to transport or bond with their baby. It can also be an opportunity for fathers and co-parents to share closeness and nurture their babies (Whittle, 2021).

Research has found that parents who carry their babies tend to be more responsive to their babies as they are in close contact. This promotes bonding and interactions that improve their baby's speech, social and emotional development (Anisfeld et al, 1990; Williams and Turner, 2019; Norholt, 2020). Some studies suggest that for mothers, it can have positive mental health benefits, lowering stress and promoting breastfeeding (Norholt, 2020).

What are the risks of using slings?

Unfortunately, some babies have been injured and even died in unsafe baby slings and carriers, although this is very rare. Non-fatal injuries were mainly caused by dropping or the adult falling, while deaths were caused by positional asphyxiation (Batra et al, 2015; Rowe et al, 2022). (Positional asphyxiation is where the baby's body position blocks their breathing and they suffocate if this goes unnoticed.) These risks have led to tighter safety standards for slings and carriers to keep babies safe.

If your baby was born with a low birth weight or has a medical condition, please discuss the safe use of a carrier or sling with a health professional. Remember to be aware of your child and check them regularly, especially if your baby is under four months old.

How can I keep my baby safe in their sling, wrap or carrier?

When it comes to using slings, it's very important to make sure you're following a few simple guidelines. You'll need to check the manufacturer's instructions, following their advice for whether the size, weight and age of your baby is right for the sling.

Before you use the sling or carrier, check for signs of wear and tear. Don't use it if you have any concerns. The safest type of sling or carrier keeps the baby solidly against the parent's body in an upright position and distributes the child's weight evenly across the wearers shoulders hips and back (ROSPA, 2022).

When your baby is in the wrap, check them often, making sure nothing is blocking their nose and mouth. Also make sure you read and follow the UK Sling Consortium's TICKS checklist:

(UK Sling Consortium, 2015)

Baby positions for slings and carriers

A recommended position is known as the spread squat, jockey position or M-position. The spread squat is where the baby is facing their adult and has their thighs spread around the wearer's torso. The baby also has their hips bent so their knees are slightly higher than their buttocks, or at buttock level with the thighs supported.

This practice is beneficial for at least the first 6 months for correct hip development, and also encourages social development as they are facing their caregiver. It is particularly important if a baby is being held in a sling for long periods of time (International Hip Dysplasia Institute, 2022). Read more about hip dysplasia (hips growing abnormally) in our article about it.

Can I breastfeed in a sling?

Using a sling while breastfeeding is associated with a longer duration of breastfeeding, due to convenience and the increased responsiveness that comes with keeping a baby close throughout the day (Pisacane et al, 2012; Little, 2019). It's important to know how to do it safely though. Do make sure you check the manufacturer's instructions as some suggest you don't breastfeed in their slings. Here are our tips:

1. Most people will stop and settle so they breastfeed while stationary. However, if you are feeding on the go then keep an eye out for trip hazards.

2. Check your baby can breathe easily. A healthy baby will never compromise their own ability to breath, but a poorly one may struggle.

3. Support your baby at all times.

4. You can breastfeed vertically or in a more laidback position. While you will still have to use your hands, the sling can give you more freedom to move. It also frees up one hand to help you get your latch sorted.

5. After feeding, ensure your baby is facing up and their head is clear of the sling and your body.
This page was last reviewed in June 2022.
Further information

Our support line offers practical and emotional support with feeding your baby and general enquiries for parents, members and volunteers: 0300 330 0700.

You might find attending one of our Early Days groups helpful as they give you the opportunity to explore different approaches to important parenting issues with a qualified group leader and other new parents in your area.

Make friends with other parents-to-be and new parents in your local area for support and friendship by seeing what NCT activities are happening nearby.

For more information on the slings available, find your nearest NCT sling library. Our sling libraries have a wide variety of slings and carriers to try and hire so you can find which one works best for you.

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Everything you need to know about slings and carriers | Baby & toddler articles & support | NCT

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
A sling, wrap or carrier is what you use to carry your child on your body, it's commonly called babywearing. It's not a new phenomenon and has been practised for centuries in different cultures. We'll use the terms sling, wrap and carrier interchangeably in the rest of this article.

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First Aid Advice for Newborn Babies - St John Ambulance

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Get baby first aid tips & information from St John Ambulance for parents. Find a range of guides for treating newborn babies who are sick or injured.