# data[].attributes.headline
A policeman is driving down the highway looking for speeders, when he sees a car going wayy over the speed limit. He turns on his sirens and pulls up next to the car where he finds an old lady knitting WHILE driving! The policeman rolls down his window and screams at the lady, "pull over!" "what?" the lady yells. "Pullover!!" The policeman screams again. The lady looks very confused, before replying, "no, Scarf!" 

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A policeman is driving down the highway looking for speeders, when he sees a car going wayy over the speed limit. He turns on his sirens and pulls up next to the car where he finds an old lady knitting WHILE driving! The policeman rolls down his window and screams at the lady, "pull over!" "what?" the lady yells. "Pullover!!" The policeman screams again. The lady looks very confused, before replying, "no, Scarf!" 

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How do you get a country girl’s attention? A tractor.

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How do you get a country girl’s attention? A tractor.

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What's the most famous fish in the sea?A starfish. If you have any better fish puns just let minnow.

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What's the most famous fish in the sea?A starfish. If you have any better fish puns just let minnow.

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"Dear math, please grow up and solve your own problems."

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"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."

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If you're Russian when you go in the bathroom and Finnish when you come out

what are you while you're in the bathroom...European.

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What did the evil chicken lay?
Deviled eggs.

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When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it be comes apparent.

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What is your favorite month?
July.
Why July?
I didn't lie.

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I don’t get why Marvel doesn’t use the Hulk to advertise more. He’s basically one big Banner.

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I don’t get why Marvel doesn’t use the Hulk to advertise more. He’s basically one big Banner.

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What kind of bird is always getting hurt? The ow-l 

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What kind of bird is always getting hurt? The ow-l 

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"Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?"
"No, what happened?"
"The teacher woke him up."

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
It was feeling a little crumby

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It's inappropriate to make a 'dad joke' if you're not a dad. It's a faux pa.

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Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing? In case they get a hole in one!

Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was, “Bach, Bach, Bach…”

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5. Why do the seagulls fly over the sea?Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels.

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5. Why do the seagulls fly over the sea?Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels.

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"What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant."

"If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?"

"If you see a crime at an Apple Store, does that make you an iWitness?"

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"What do you call a factory that makes okay products?" " A Satisfactory."

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"What do you call a factory that makes okay products?" " A Satisfactory."

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Why can't you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom? Because the 'P' is silent.

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"What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?" "Supplies!"