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I’m a 16-year-old student harboring ardent feelings for ateacher. She’s an absolutely wonderful (in my view, angelic)human being, who seems utterly devoted to what she does and is terribly cordial to us students. It is out of awe for herpersonality, and gratitude for how she’s made a mark in my life,that I feel so attached to her. She’s in her late 20s, I suppose,but I feel she could be 18. My feelings are not sexual, but my social circles make barely any room for this possibility. I can find little solace in my friends for fear that they’d mock me because she’s not considered a looker. I feel an urge to tell her how amazing and adored she is, but fear she’ll be threatened or affronted, or that she’ll feel pained for me and not know how torespond.

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I’m 22, single and very romantic, yet I can’t relate towomen. I grew up with a womanizing father and ever since I can remember he has made comments about women and sex. No man in my family has ever achieved true love and they have all had multiple sex partners and lovers, betraying the confidence of wives and long-term girlfriends. My great grandfather, my grandfather, my uncle and my father share thisand some of me thinks that I can’t fight it, that I will become the same. But I struggle. I just can’t talk to women; I can’t playcharming around them even when I have a good relationship with them in spaces such as work or college. I have “female friends”, but I can’t break the confidence they have in me by playing the love card. So I’m often the friend of the women Ilike. My entire romantic concept has been built by culture, by movies like Gone with the Wind or Doctor Zhivago, books like A Farewell to Arms, For Whom the Bells Tolls and long sessions of the Smiths or the Cure.

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I have a 23-year-old daughter. Her mother and I split up when she was seven due to her mother’s infidelity. I still see mydaughter regularly and she is close to my wife and the two otherchildren we have. My daughter didn’t have a “proper” boyfrienduntil she was in her late teens. Last week I was informed that her new boyfriend is a little older than her. It transpires he’s 48!He also has a wife and two children who he is preparing to leave to be with my daughter. I am, in equal measures, furious, horrified, embarrassed, ashamed and desperate. This new boyfriend is older than my wife, who is 46. I am 55. My daughter wants me to meet this man, but I am too shocked and angry that a man of his age and with his responsibilities could behave in this manner. How should I handle this? I am too embarrassed to talk to my friends about it.

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I am 38, happily married with two children and have a job I enjoy. However, I have found myself plagued by anxiety about friendships and feelings of loneliness. Since having children I seem to have been on a roller-coaster of friendships. As our lives have evolved, people have drifted away. I now feel I am left with acquaintances (mainly school mums) rather than actual friends. I find WhatsApp groups stressful and can’t go onFacebook, as I feel jealous when I see events where I haven’tbeen included. Some of my pre-children friends remain, but busy lives and distance mean I only see them a couple of timesa year. I’ve given up on phone calls, as people only seem towant to text! I just don’t know how I can get out of thisspiraling anxious mindset. Will it improve when my children are older, or without play dates will my social life dry up altogether?

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I am a 30-year-old guy and I am really lonely. I was born in Iran and was raised in a conservative family and society. I wentto university there and graduated with a master’s degree inEnglish language studies. I am now at university in Germany, but I am not able to make friends with girls. I have no proper job, no future and not even a friend. I tried online dating sites;they don’t work. What is wrong with me? I even think of endingmy life. I do not have any future going back to a country which does not accept me when I do not believe in Islam.

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Hello dear friend,

First of all, I want to tell you that I understand your situation and I know how you feel. However, you should not feel desperate and horrified by what is happening with your daughter. You might think that you did something wrong, but it's not like that. Your responsibility was to raise her and educate her with ethical principles and values. She is already an adult woman, she may be a little inexperienced but in the end it is already her responsibility what happens. Hard as it may be, I would advise you to meet the man she loves, this could help you to know him much better and so you can determine his intentions with your daughter. I'm sure she shall be happy to see you talking to him.

With time you will be able to assimilate the situation. By age don´t panic, nowadays it is a very usual situation for a young woman to fall in love with an older married man with children. Remember that love can be blind and has no age limits. You cannot be a nuisance to your daughter, you must understand her and be always willing to help her. As for your friends, you will have to reflect a lot and you might acquire the strength to swallow your pride and confront them. Courage, if you take my advice you will feel better and things could be fine with your daughter.

A hug.