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Mothers who have gained unresolved trauma may not be responsive to the development of their child, impairing the child’s attachment and can contribute to the passing of intergenerational trauma. The unresolved trauma can help give both the child and parent insecure attachments, for example, some trauma cases have resulted from the mother losing a loved one, resulting in the mother becoming detached from the child. The child then has trouble signaling their distress towards others and creates alarming behaviors. Without a mother’s ability to respond sensitively and positively towards their child, the mother-daughter bond cannot form and ultimately fix the unresolved trauma (Iyengar 1-2).

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Child abuse is known as when a parent or guardian’s act or lack of action leads to physical, sexual, or emotional harm for a child. In the case of child abuse, the perpetrator is usually a parent; however, abuse can also come from other family members, coaches, teachers, and other adults involved in a child’s life. There are three main types of abuse children experience: physical, emotional, and sexual. Physical abuse occurs when a person intentionally brings about physical harm on another. This is usually used as a form of punishment in the case of children and includes actions such as slapping, kicking, shoving, or burning the victim. Secondly, emotional abuse is any act that tells a child that they are flawed, worthless, or unlovable by destroying their sense of self. Behaviors commonly associated with emotional abuse are insults, swearing, name-calling, withholding love, and manipulation. Emotional abuse is not physical but is equally psychologically damaging. Lastly, sexual abuse occurs when an adult exposes a minor to sexual material or involves physical contact. Forms of sexual abuse include fondling and exposing children to sexual activities. Child abuse comes in any shapes and sizes, and it is important to understand the forms that abuse comes in (Mehta).

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Similarly, siblings dealing with loss maintain guilt and emotional vulnerability throughout their lifetime. Siblings share a unique bond like no other. They nurture and protect one another, when one of them dies, the surviving sibling is left to navigate life alone. The loss shatters their sense of security and belonging, causing survivor guilt, and the want to change the past (Fletcher). The sibling could feel responsible for the death or like they could have prevented it. These thoughts can interfere with daily activities and academics. The absence of their sibling causes an emotional void that can never be filled. Suicidal thoughts and trust issues arise from the mental struggles. Despite the aversity, the child will move on, but they may experience insomnia, conceal their true feelings, and have difficulties in forming relationships. Through it all, surviving siblings have reliance by continuing their lives without their other halves, drawing strength from the bond they once had (White).

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Women who marry at a very young age are predisposed to lack in emotional connections with their children and push unreasonable expectations. Early marriage is a major problem in the parenting process that effects both the parent and child. Parents who marry early tend to adopt an authoritarian parenting style, which can lead to poor child development. This dictatorship style of parenting can contribute to high achievement demands on children which might lead to depression of the child (Dokter). Marriage during adolescence can also be a form of unresolved trauma that contributes to how parents treat their kids. Mothers who marry early oftentimes overly shelter their children to protect them from the same future. While this may be good to protect the child, it can lead to a child growing up to be rebellious or lack the skills needed for independence (Kelloway).

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Maternal grief takes a toll on a mother’s mental capacity regarding the new life they are living without their child. When the loss is sudden or unexpected various damaging signs linger within a mother for a series of weeks, months, and even years (Brindle).  Feeling the weight of responsibility for their child’s death and asking the question, “but what if?” constantly replays sending mothers into unrealistic spirals (Meisenhelder). Unanticipated child deaths destroy a mother’s sense of protection leaving the mother in vulnerable state (Brindle). These spirals quickly overturn into pain-triggered anger (Meisenhelder). From expressing anger through family arguments, anger serves as protective cover to hide away the pain a mother experience (Meisenhelder).

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Afghan women often navigate their lives under Taliban rule by adopting strategies throughout their daily lives. In the face of abuse from the Taliban, women turn to underground networks and secret schools to further their education. The numerous networks help women navigate hazardous risks while reclaiming the women’s right to their education. Women strategically navigate the Taliban’s inhumane rule to benefit themselves through forced marriages and merchandising. Afghan women succumb the Taliban’s unjust treatment by marrying into supportive or important families with connections for their benefit. Other women cling to entrepreneurship, such as home-based businesses to contribute to the women’s families financially while yielding to the Taliban’s restrictions. Despite the cruel and biased treatment Afghan women face during the war, the women still search for opportunities to stay defiant in the face of adversities. (Phasuk)

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People that experience abuse during their childhood are prone to abusing their family later in life because that is the only parenting style they know and that causes them to treat their children the way they were treated. The abuse also impacts a parent’s reflective functioning capacity, which is their mental capacity to understand their own and their children’s behaviors (Cristobal, Fuenzalida, Santelices). The experience of trauma alone, however, does not compromise a parent’s ability to respond to their kid’s emotions and needs. It does compromise a parent’s capacity to mentalize about their own trauma and appears to contribute to their capacity to tend to and satisfy their children’s needs and provide care giving. People not being able to understand behaviors of themselves or their family drives a wedge between the two since the parent is not able to satisfy the needs or provide care for their children.

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Authoritarian parents prioritize a high level of control with no room for negotiations. There are strict rules that a child must obey causing them to display negative effects. These children can be shy, socially inept, and may even display signs of depression and other mental diseases (Chen). Research shows that in the U.S. adolescents are more likely to suffer depressive symptoms if they identify their parents as using authoritarian parenting. Research in Caribbean countries paints the picture that kids raised by these authoritarian parents are much more likely to be products of low self-esteem, in comparison to the children that have authoritative parents. In countries like Germany, research found that teenagers suffered from severe anxiety and depersonalization. This is the feeling of watching oneself without being in control of your actions (Dewar). These major effects of authoritarian parenting on a child’s mental health allows a person to see that adopting a more balanced and encouraging approach to parenting opens a doorway for a more confident child who can thrive in their home environment.

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There is a large stigma surrounding divorce, especially in Chinese culture, and stigmas and societal expectations can greatly impact a woman’s decision to get divorced or not. The traditional Chinese view of marriage stems from creating a family and reproducing. Therefore, divorce was often seen as evil and against family values (Suet-Lin Hung). Divorce is also seen commonly as a sign of failure, breach of trust, or betrayal (Torrone). Due to society having preconceived notions surrounding divorce, women are often times dissuaded from pursuing their own happiness in favor of perpetuating what society deems as normalcy. Stigmas and expectations can impact and influence women’s view of divorce, especially when Chinese culture is a factor.

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Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a link to authoritarian parenting and leads children to feel a sense of failure, a low self – esteem, and emotional and behavioral problems in the future. Research has shown mothers who experienced trauma in their early life are more susceptible to raising their child through authoritarian parenting (Leigh). Authoritarian parenting refers to “a strict style of parenting that places high expectations on children” (Sachdev). The authoritarian parenting style often negatively effects children. Some negative affects include anxiety, a struggle in social situations, and problems accepting failure. Ultimately, a mother’s PTSD can greatly affect one’s bond with their child and lead to an overall strict parenting style.

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Children who have experienced abuse have a higher risk of problems relating to peers and social norms. A child’s relationship with peers is crucial to their well-being. Child abuse has a permanent impact on a child’s development in biological, psychosocial, behavioral, and cognitive elements of life. When children are not able to form trusting bonds with their parents it causes their thoughts of others to be altered and difficulties with their peers. Children who have experienced abuse have had difficulties with peers in school due to frustration arising from challenges in school and social places. Studies have shown that children who have experienced physical forms of abuse showed social withdraw yet aggressive behavior. Children who are abused struggle to maintain a social life and making friends.(Peterson 2-32)

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Children learn from their environment which structures their mindsets. The children start developing their reactions at the very beginning of their lives. If surrounded by hostility or neglectfulness, their behavior will alter negatively, and they may act harshly in future scenarios. Parenting supports the child’s mental, emotional, physical, and social development, so the children’s mental abilities correlate with the quality of parenting. If the child’s environment exudes affection, their mental state grows positively leading to sensible decisions that they gauge. On the other hand, dismissive environments lead children to develop unhealthy mindsets, causing harmful ways of thinking. (Lanjekar)

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Women in ancient Greece were viewed differently from men in ancient Greece, despite the fact that women had more rights than in many other places in the world, even able to manage their own assets without a husband ("Feminism & Ancient Greece”). In an ancient Grecian family, or an oikos, one of the main tasks for the females is to carry out burial rites for any dead members of the oikos (Bobko). If the women of the family were to not complete this duty, they would bring shame to the family and disrespect to the dead (Bobko). In ancient Greece, burials and taking care of the dead was a major part of Grecian culture (Scott). A main focus of Greek culture was on the dead, and not carrying out a proper burial is against cultural, religious, and social standards of the time (Scott). The act of defying these standards brings shame to living members of the oikos, and can even cause problems for any non-family members involved (Bobko). Despite the fact that the women are tasked with burial rites, the men of the oikos are expected to guide and make sure that the women carry out their tasks, which is why the entire oikos is shamed instead of just the women (Bobko).

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Authoritarian parenting style involves a lack of positive reinforcement and no patience with misbehavior. It also includes extremely high expectations and rules that the children follow solely follows to appease their parents. If the child does defy the parents wishes or talks back, they will receive a harsh punishment. Authoritarian parenting style has many negative effects on children. Children of authoritarian parenting have behavioral problems outside of the home by acting in a rude manner to their peers. They also experience low self-esteem, a sense of failure, and problems accepting the failure. This comes from the harsh criticism given to them at a very early developing stage.  All of the following points can lead to problems with children as they develop (Sachdev).

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When a child has their reality denied, it often conditions a pattern of trying harder to gain their caregiver’s approval or validation, which can breed enmeshment and codependency and self-betrayal for the sake of trying to be loved (Tanasugarn). Abuse can cause psychological trauma because it involves repeated experiences of fear, helplessness, and violation. These traumatic events can disrupt a person's sense of safety, trust, and control, leading to long-lasting effects on their mental health. The emotional and psychological pain from abuse can manifest in symptoms such as anxiety, depression, nightmares, and difficulty forming healthy relationships. The constant threat of harm can lead to a heightened state of anxiety and hypervigilance. Physical abuse can also affect a person’s self-esteem, leading to feelings of shame and guilt.

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Upon moving to America, Chinese women sought greater independence due to the prevalence of feminist views, which contrasted with the pro-male culture of their homeland. There is no question that when the matriarchs of the book immigrate to America, they are leaving behind an extremely male-dominated country. There was a system in China called Sancong, that essentially placed women beneath the male figure in their life starting with their fathers, then husbands, and lastly, sons, if they were to become widows. This was the stereotypical path for a woman; however, some females did not even make it to phase one of Sancong. This is because most families would abandon their daughters right after they were born, disappointed that they did not have a son who could carry on their family legacy. After being a subordinate to her father, a woman was almost always placed into arranged marriages, which were planned by both male and female families when their children were born. Oddly enough, even if a female was arranged to marry a man and he died, she would still join his family as a widow, falling back into the Sancong cycle again. This constant cycle of being underneath a man was enough to drive Chinese women to search for a new, more free beginning. (Cartwright, 2017).

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In Taliban-controlled Afghanistan, women possessed little rights and numerous restrictions. Women faced discrimination for the sole reason of identifying as a girl (“Women in Afghanistan”). Women had no independence, were banned from going to school or having a job, and were expected to cover their hair and skin in public (“Women in Afghanistan”). Women were even prohibited from holding a job as a doctor for other women (Allen). Girls might only be able to receive a primary or secondary education, and then would have to enter into an arranged marriage.

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When the Taliban took over Afghanistan in the late 90s, the lives of women changed drastically. The Taliban began suppressing women from doing normal things in their daily lives, like schooling, jobs, health care, and clothing choices. Being a woman was a crime to the Taliban. Women were restricted from attending school and holding jobs, even if the job needed a woman. Because of these restrictions, health care was hard to come by as men would not deliver health care to women, and women could not hold jobs as doctors. These rules prevented women from having any kind of freedom and lives in Afghanistan, only depending on a male relative or husband to make money (Women in Afghanistan: The Back Story).  Women were also forced to wear burqas if they were out in public, having no choice in what to wear. A burqa is a full-body veil that covers a woman's whole body, preventing any skin to be showing. The burqa dehumanized the women, making them not people but objects that needed to be hidden from the male gaze (Hopkins). The Taliban dehumanized the women, making them not real people.