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Sharon Salzberg, co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society, offers a “Guided Lovingkindness Meditation” — Sending loving-kindess to people we feel neutral towards as well as those we have difficult feelings towards.

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Sharon Salzberg, co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society, offers a "Guided Lovingkindness Meditation" - Sending loving-kindess to people we feel neutral towards as well as those we have difficult feelings towards.
The Path to Loving-Kindness: Choose Your Phrases

Loving-kindness is meant to be done in the easiest way possible so that the experience springs forth most gently, most naturally. To do it in the most easiest way possible means first to use phrases that are personally meaningful. The traditional phrases as are taught, at least this one classical translation of them, begins with oneself:

May I be free from danger, may I know safety. Danger in that sense is both inner danger from the force of certain mind states, and outer danger. So, May I be free from danger. May I have mental happiness. May I have physical happiness. May I have ease of well-being -which means may I not have to struggle terribly, day by day, with livelihood, with family issues.

Let your mind rest in the phrases. You can be aware of the phrases either with the breath or just in themselves-the focus of the attention is the phrases. Let your mind rest within them. The feelings will come and go.

May I be free from danger, may I have mental happiness, but really, you should use any phrases that are powerful for you. They need to be meaningful not just in a very temporary way- May I get to this course okay -but something profound that you would wish for yourself and wish for others. Thoughts are very important in doing loving-kindness-not to struggle to get a certain kind of feeling. Let your mind rest in the phrases. You can be aware of the phrases either with the breath or just in themselves-the focus of the attention is the phrases. Let your mind rest within them. The feelings will come and go.

Sometimes it will feel quite glorious, it will be extraordinary.

Sometimes, many times, it will be very very ordinary, very dry or very mechanical-but it doesn't matter. It doesn't mean that nothing is happening or that it's not working. What's important is to do it, is to form that intention in the mind because we're uniting the power of loving-kindness and the power of intention and that is what will produce the effect of that free flow of loving-kindness.

Loving-Kindness Takes Time

The first time that I ever did loving-kindness practice was without a teacher. We first opened up the center; a group of us decided to do a self retreat here for a month and I had never done loving-kindness before although I had heard about it. I thought it was a perfect opportunity to do it.

I sat up in my room and I knew that it was done in successive stages and I began by dedicating a week of sending myself loving-kindness. All day long, I would go around the building-sitting in my room, sitting in the hall-saying the whole thing, may I be happy, may I be peaceful, may I be liberated, and I felt absolutely nothing.

At the end of the week, something happened to someone in the community and a number of us, quite unexpectedly, had to leave the retreat. Then I felt doubly bad-not only did nothing happen but I never even got beyond myself, which was really selfish.

I was running around upstairs in the flurry of having to leave. I was standing in one of the bathrooms and I dropped a jar of something, which shattered into a thousand pieces. The very first thought that came up in my mind was: "You are really a klutz, but I love you." And I thought, "Oh wow! Look at that." All those hours, all those phrases where I was just dry and mechanical and I felt like nothing was happening. It was happening. It just took a while for me to sense the flowering of that and it was so spontaneous that it was quite wonderful. So: Not to struggle, to try to make something happen. Let it happen. It will happen.

Our job, so to speak, is just to say those phrases, to say them knowing what they mean but without trying to fabricate a feeling, without putting that overlay on top of it, of stress. Let your mind rest in the phrases, and let the phrases be meaningful to you.

I'd like to talk about sending a loving-kindness to the neutral person and a little bit about sending loving-kindness to somebody who we have difficulty with as we send a message to a neutral person.

Sending Loving-Kindness to the Neutral Party

The first task of course is to find one-sometimes that's very interesting. I find that very often as soon as we either meet somebody or even think about them, if we haven't met them, we have a judgment about them: I like them I don't like them.

If you can find a neutral person, sometimes there's a great refreshment in sending them loving-kindness because there's no story about them.

See if you can understand that this person wants to be happy just as each one of us wants to be happy and open, extend that force of loving-kindness towards them.

Sending Loving-Kindness to the Difficult Party

After we do that for a little while, move on, just briefly, to sending loving-kindness to somebody that we have difficulty with. This is a very interesting place because it's very difficult. It's a very powerful place because that person, in some ways, symbolizes the difference between love or loving-kindness, which is conditional, and that which is on uncondition that which goes beyond having our desires met, having affection returned, having people treat us well. It is that person that defines the line between that which is finite and that which is infinite. Yet it's not easy. Very often to think of this person and you enmity, or anger, or fear, whatever. As a suggestion, when we begin that part of the practice, in the spirit of doing it in the easiest way possible, it's probably better to start with somebody where there's mild irritation rather than the person who has hurt you most in your life.

And slowly begin to open in levels of difficulty. Sometimes when we send loving-kindness to a difficult person, we do feel all of these other feelings, like anger. If possible, see if you can let go of it. Return the recitation of the phrases. If it's too strong, then you can drop the loving-kindness. Pay careful attention to the feeling until it begins to subside some, very much with the sense of compassion for oneself: You don't need to judge it. Now when you can you can pick up the loving-kindness again, perhaps with an easier person.

Guided Loving-Kindness Practice

To begin, take a comfortable seated position. Let's begin by sitting comfortably, closing your eyes.

Find phrases you'd like to use to offer good wishes. Taking a few deep breaths, relaxing the body, finding the phrases that reflect what you wish most deeply for yourself. Very gently repeat them.

Bring someone to mind who's been kind to you. If you have someone come to mind who has been a benefactor to help in some way, for whom you feel respect or gratitude, either hold an image of that person, or say their names in your mind. Direct that force of loving-kindness towards them, wishing them safety, happiness, and peace. Very gently, one phrase at a time, let the mind rest in the phrase.

And if a good friend comes to mind, someone who you care about, there's mutual caring, hold a sense of this person, direct the phrases towards them, wishing for their happiness and their well-being.

Bring a neutral person to mind. Ideally it would be somebody here of course because you have an opportunity to run into them, to observe how a feeling of loving-kindness develops over the course of time. If someone here of if not here then someone in your life who you don't have a strong sense of liking or disliking. See if you can bring that person to mind. Extend the feeling of loving-kindness towards them- just as we all want to be happy, so this person also wants to be happy. If nobody comes to mind in this category, then you can just stay with a good friend.

If it feels workable, bring to mind someone with whom you experience difficulty. If there's somebody that you have difficulty with, perhaps not very grave difficulty at this point-someone with whom there's conflict, there's tension. There's unease, there's dislike. Remembering that his person, too, just wants to happy-that out of ignorance, we all make mistakes that create harm or suffering, and that causing suffering inevitably will bring suffering to that person. See if you can extend that force of loving-kindness towards them. To send loving-kindness does not mean that we approve or condone all actions, it means that we can see clearly actions that are incorrect or unskillful and still not lose the connection.

To send loving-kindness does not mean that we approve or condone all actions, it means that we can see clearly actions that are incorrect or unskillful and still not lose the connection.

Calling someone to mind with whom there's difficulty, repeat the phrases towards them. If you can find one good thing about this person, in the midst of everything else, if you focus on that one good thing, just reflect on it for a moment, you'll find that there's a feeling of drawing closer, opening up, and all the rest can be seen in that light.

If you can't find even one good thing about this person, you can reflect on their wish to be happy.

Expand your awareness to all beings, everywhere, without distinction, without exclusion. May all beings be free from danger, may they have mental happiness, may they have physical happiness, may they have ease of well-being.

All living beings: may they be free from danger, may they have mental happiness, may they have physical happiness, may they have ease of well-being.

All creatures, known or unknown, near or far, some we like, some we don't like, some we're neutral towards.

All individuals... happy, suffering, causing suffering. Still they have this wish to be happy, to be free. May it be so. And all those in existence. Every being, all places, may they be able to realize the fruits of just what it is that we wish for ourselves.

Adapted from a talk from Sharon Salzberg at the Insight Meditation Society. Listen to the full talk.

A Loving-Kindness Meditation to Boost Compassion

Don't Fall into the Self-Esteem Trap: Try a Little Self-Kindness

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Why Loving-Kindness Takes Time: Sharon Salzberg

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Sharon Salzberg, co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society, offers a "Guided Lovingkindness Meditation" - Sending loving-kindess to people we feel neutral towards as well as those we have difficult feelings towards. Loving-kindness is meant to be done in the easiest way possible so that the experience springs forth most gently, most naturally.

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Greater Good

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Mindfulness meditation is everywhere these days. From the classroom to the board room, people are jumping on the mindfulness bandwagon, hoping to discover for themselves some of its promised benefits, like better focus, more harmonious relationships, and less stress.

I too have started a mindfulness meditation practice and have found it to be helpful in my everyday life. But, as a science writer, I still have to wonder: Is all of the hype around mindfulness running ahead of the science? What does the research really say about mindfulness?

To answer these questions, look no further than Altered Traits: Science Reveals How Meditation Changes Your Mind, Brain, and Body, a new book by journalist Daniel Goleman and prominent neuroscientist Richard Davidson. Putting their decades of research and knowledge together, Davidson and Goleman have written a highly readable book that helps readers separate the wheat from the chaff of mindfulness science. In the process, they make a cogent argument that meditation, in various forms, has the power to transform us not only in the moment, but in more profound, lasting ways.

Many people have been introduced to mindfulness meditation practices through the work of Jon Kabat-Zinn's Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) program. MBSR has been researched extensively and tied to many positive outcomes for medical patients. But while MBSR has helped a lot of people, it's not always clear which aspects of the training-mindful breathing versus yoga versus loving-kindness meditation-are most helpful for particular issues facing people. Nor is it always clear that the impacts of MBSR training extend long beyond when the training ends.

That's where Davidson and Goleman come in. They aim to unveil not just the temporary effects of mindfulness training, but how practicing various forms of meditation over time affects our general traits-more stable aspects of ourselves. And they make the case that simpler forms of mindfulness training may have some benefits, but fall short when you are looking for lasting change.

According to the authors, there are five main ways that meditation-particularly when practiced consistently over time-can make a deeper impact on us.

1. Meditation improves our resiliency to stress

According to neuroscience research, mindfulness practices dampen activity in our amygdala and increase the connections between the amygdala and prefrontal cortex, both of which help us to be less reactive to stressors and to recover better from stress when we experience it. "These changes are trait-like: they appear not simply during the explicit instruction to perceive the stressful stimuli mindfully, but even in the 'baseline' state'" for longer-term meditators, which supports the possibility that mindfulness changes our ability to handle stress in a better, more permanent way.

2. Meditation increases our compassionate concern for others

While many of us may espouse compassionate attitudes, we can also suffer when we see others suffering, which can create a state of paralysis or withdrawal. But studies have shown that practicing loving-kindness for others increases our willingness to take action to relieve suffering. It appears to do this by lessening amygdala activity in the presence of suffering, while also activating circuits in the brain that are connected to good feelings and love. "The cultivation of a loving concern for other people's well-being has a surprising and unique benefit: the brain circuitry for happiness emerges, along with compassion," write the authors.

3. Meditation augments our capacity to focus and pay attention

It's not too surprising that meditation would affect attention, since many practices focus on this very skill. And, in fact, researchers have found that meditation helps to combat habituation-the tendency to stop paying attention to new information in our environment. Studies have shown that improved attention seems to last up to five years after mindfulness training, suggesting trait-like changes are possible. This outcome of meditation is particularly important, because it "undergirds a huge range of what makes us effective in the world-everything from learning, to realizing we've had a creative insight, to seeing a project through to its end."

4. Meditation helps us to feel lighter and less self-focused

Though related to compassion, this is a more specific finding about how mindfulness helps you to stop seeing yourself as the center of the universe. According to studies, activity in the "default network"-the part of our brains that, when not busy with focused activity, ruminates on thoughts, feelings, and experiences- quiets down in longtime meditators, suggesting less rumination about ourselves and our place in the world. Long-term meditators also seem to have a smaller nucleus accumbens-a part of the brain associated with pleasure, but also addiction. According to the authors, "These regions very likely underlie what traditional [Buddhist] texts see as the root causes of suffering: attachment and aversion, where the mind becomes fixated on wanting something that seems rewarding or getting rid of something unpleasant."

5. Meditation leads to some improvements in markers of health.

Many claims have been made about mindfulness and health; but sometimes these claims are hard to substantiate or may be mixed up with other effects. For example, when it comes to pain-where our psychology plays a clear role in our experience of pain-it's now clear that meditation can lessen pain without directly addressing its physiological source. However, there is some good evidence that meditation affects physiological indices of health, too. For example, practicing meditation lessons the inflammatory response in people exposed to psychological stressors, particularly for long-term meditators. Also, meditators seem to have increased activity of telomerase-an enzyme implicated in longer cell life and, therefore, longevity.

The authors outline other possible benefits of meditation which have less robust findings. But, while the evidence for these can be fascinating, Davidson and Goleman dutifully report the counter evidence as well, trying to employ "the strictest experimental standards" to avoid making unfounded claims. They even question some of their own findings, such as Davidson's research on changes in the brain for meditators, which they later decided didn't have great experimental controls.

"The differences found [between meditators and non-meditators] could be due to factors like education or exercise, each of which has its own buffering effect on brains," they write. "Then there's self-selection: Perhaps people with the brain changes reported in these studies choose to stick with meditation while others do not." In other words, use caution when championing results.

In general, the authors lament the poor quality of many studies and the way these are used to justify mindfulness applications in many arenas. They worry that too many studies lack rigor or that some well-done studies are never published because they don't have positive findings. These and many other caveats about the research affirm that we are in the hands of experts who know their stuff. The result is a book that both enlightens those interested in the topic and calms the skeptics. For those who may be on the fence about meditation, I suggest reading the book and coming to your own conclusions. Perhaps, it will do the same for you.

Greater Good wants to know: Do you think this article will influence your opinions or behavior?

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Mindfulness meditation is everywhere these days. From the classroom to the board room, people are jumping on the mindfulness bandwagon, hoping to discover for themselves some of its promised benefits, like better focus, more harmonious relationships, and less stress. I too have started a mindfulness meditation practice and have found it to be helpful in my everyday life.

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Be Mindful

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Dexter and Tonya Scott, TheUpgraders.com

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BeaMindful.com is for sale | HugeDomains

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Shop a wide selection of domains at HugeDomains.com. Find the right domain name today.

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Little Flower Yoga

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Little Flower Yoga

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Glitter Jar - How to Make in 4 Easy Steps | Little Flower Yoga

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How to make a glitter jar. How to make a peace jar. How to make a meditation jar. Teach your child how to focus.

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The Effects of Mindfulness on Children and Youth

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The Effects of Mindfulness on Children and Youth

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Sage Journals

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Mindfulness Exercises fo Kids

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sitting still like a frog: mindfulness exercises for kids (and their parents)

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mind & spirit / mindfulness & meditation

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family & relationships / parenting / general

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psychology / psychotherapy / child & adolescent

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psychology/psychotherapy - child & adolescent

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mind & spirit / mindfulness & meditation

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family & relationships / parenting / general

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psychology / psychotherapy / child & adolescent

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psychology/psychotherapy - child & adolescent

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Sitting Still Like a Frog: Mindfulness Exercises for Kids (and Their Parents)

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Simple mindfulness practices to help your child (ages 5-12) deal with anxiety, improve concentration, and handle difficult emotions. Includes a 60-minute audio CD of guided exercises read by Myla Kabat-Zinn.Mindfulness-the quality of attention that combines full awareness with accepta...

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In this practice you’ll sort your mind’s activities into three categories: thoughts, feelings, and sensations.

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In this practice you'll sort your mind's activities into three categories: thoughts, feelings, and sensations. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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Beginning the day well

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Rainbow Breath - Learn To Raise Your Energy | Meditation For Kids | Breathing Exercises | GoNoodle

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What went well today? Kids and teens can explore this eight-minute guided meditation for noticing the positive.

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One way our brain keeps us safe is by staying very focused on whatever seems wrong or off or dangerous. Sometimes, it's important to notice that kind of thing: Take care of yourself or find someone you trust to help.

Sometimes, what happens instead is that we can't stop thinking about something we don't like. You may feel stressed by a test, or a friend, or your parents. It can be hard to let go of that kind of thought. Sometimes, it takes practice to focus on the good stuff, too.

You may feel stressed by a test, or a friend, or your parents. It can be hard to let go of that kind of thought. Sometimes, it takes practice to focus on the good stuff, too.

1) Lie down somewhere comfortable. Let your arms and legs fall to the ground. Close your eyes gently.

2) Start to notice how your body changes with each breath you take. Each time you breathe, your belly moves up, and your belly moves down. If it is easier, put a hand on your belly. Or if you want, put a stuffed animal there.

Each time you breathe, your belly moves. Your hand, or your toy, rises, and then falls. See if you can count ten breaths that way. Breathing in, one, breathing out, one. (Repeat for nine more inhales, and nine more exhales.)

When you lose count, don't worry about it. That's normal, and happens to everyone. Come back to whatever number you last remember.

3) Now, shift your attention to your day. Breathing in, focus on your breath as your belly goes up. Breathing out, focus on something that went well today.

With each breath: breathing in, noticing your belly move, and with each breath out, noticing something that went well today.

4) Now, picture something about yourself that makes you proud. Breathing in, focus on your belly moving. Breathing out, picture something that makes you proud about yourself. If nothing comes to mind, that sometimes happens. If that's how you feel, picture what you'd wish for yourself instead.

5) Finally, bring someone to mind who makes you happy. Before we end, try one more practice. Breathing in, notice your belly move. And now, breathing out picture someone who makes you happy.

As you come to the end of this practice, take a few deep breaths, and start to wiggle your arms and legs. Pause and decide what you'd like to do next.

It's normal to have thoughts that make us feel scared or bad. We should never ignore anything important, but it's useful to focus on the rest of our lives too. Take a few minutes every day to notice what has gone well, and see what happens next.

A Mindfulness Practice for Preschoolers That Connects Kids to Nature

Mindfulness in Schools Can Provide a Lifeline for Teens

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Mindful Kids Practice: Coming Back to the Positive

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One way our brain keeps us safe is by staying very focused on whatever seems wrong or off or dangerous. Sometimes, it's important to notice that kind of thing: Take care of yourself or find someone you trust to help. Sometimes, what happens instead is that we can't stop thinking about something we don't like.

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Kindness Mantra

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Learn About Compassion | Guided Meditation For Kids | Breathing Exercises | GoNoodle

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Movement and Mindfulness

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You can regain some control over your attention through this dual-point focus activity, during which you are focusing on two senses at the same time.

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You can regain some control over your attention through this dual-point focus activity, during which you are focusing on two senses at the same time. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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Events and Courses

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yoga for special needs  meditation for kids

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LFY teaches yoga and mindfulness classes in school and youth organizations in New York, and offers a yoga alliance certified children's yoga teacher training in locations around the country.

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Little Flower Yoga

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Annals of Behavioral Medicine

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Abstract

Background: Although mindfulness meditation interventions have recently shown benefits for reducing stress in various populations, little is known about their relative efficacy compared with relaxation interventions. Purpose: This randomized controlled trial examines the effects of a 1-month mindfulness meditation versus somatic relaxation training as compared to a control group in 83 students (M age=25; 16 men and 67 women) reporting distress. Method: Psychological distress, positive states of mind, distractive and ruminative thoughts and behaviors, and spiritual experience were measured, while controlling for social desirability. Results: Hierarchical linear modeling reveals that both meditation and relaxation groups experienced significant decreases in distress as well as increases in positive mood states over time, compared with the control group (p<.05 in all cases). There were no significant differences between meditation and relaxation on distress and positive mood states over time. Effect sizes for distress were large for both meditation and relaxation (Cohen's d=1.36 and .91, respectively), whereas the meditation group showed a larger effect size for positive states of mind than relaxation (Cohen's d=.71 and .25, respectively). The meditation group also demonstrated significant pre-post decreases in both distractive and ruminative thoughts/behaviors compared with the control group (p<.04 in all cases; Cohen's d=.57 for rumination and .25 for distraction for the meditation group), with mediation models suggesting that mindfulness meditation's effects on reducing distress were partially mediated by reducing rumination. No significant effects were found for spiritual experience. Conclusions: The data suggest that compared with a no-treatment control, brief training in mindfulness meditation or somatic relaxation reduces distress and improves positive mood states. However, mindfulness meditation may be specific in its ability to reduce distractive and ruminative thoughts and behaviors, and this ability may provide a unique mechanism by which mindfulness meditation reduces distress.

Keywords

Behavioral Medicine Mindfulness Training Mindfulness Medita Spiritual Experience Brief Symptom Inventory

This research was supported by the Canyon Ranch Fellowship in Integrative Health Psychology at the University of Arizona. We are grateful to Steven Hickman, Psy. D., for review and comments on this article.

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References

1. Kabat-Zinn J, Lipworth L, Burney R, Sellers W: Four-year follow-up of a meditation-based program for the self-regulation of chronic pain: Treatment outcomes and compliance. Clinical Journal of Pain. 1986, 2:159-173.

2. Oikawa M: Distraction as an intervention for depression: The distraction process. Japanese Journal of Educational Psychology. 2002, 50:185-192.

© Society of Behavioral Medicine 2003

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A randomized controlled trial of mindfulness meditation versus relaxation training: Effects on distress, positive states of mind, rumination, and distraction

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Background: Although mindfulness meditation interventions have recently shown benefits for reducing stress in various populations, little is known about their relative efficacy compared with relaxation interventions. Purpose: This randomized controlled trial examines the effects of a 1-month mindfulness meditation versus somatic relaxation training as compared to a control group in 83 students (M age=25; 16 men and 67 women) reporting distress.

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This activity is useful in bringing awareness to the places you hold tension. It can also help your body get ready for rest or sleep.

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This activity is useful in bringing awareness to the places you hold tension. It can also help your body get ready for rest or sleep. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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This is a version of Child’s Pose that can be practiced in a chair and gives students the ability to rest and restore.

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This is a version of Child's Pose that can be practiced in a chair and gives students the ability to rest and restore. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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Further Reading

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From the bestselling author and renowned mindfulness teacher, scientist, and educator. . .a guide to living a meaningful life.This follow-up to the widely praised national bestseller Wherever You Go, There You Are is yet another revolutionary offering from Jon Kabat-Zinn, showing readers how the power of mindfulness can bring radical change to their lives.In the national bestseller Wherever You Go, There You Are, Jon Kabat-Zinn struck a chord in contemporary society that continues to reverberate to this day.

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Informal mindfulness practices for those of us who don’t have five minutes to contemplate a raisin.

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Eating as mindfully as we do on retreat or in a mindfulness course is not realistic for many of us, especially with families, jobs, and the myriad distractions around us. This is not to mention that our friends, family and colleagues might not have the patience to eat with us as we take five minutes with each bite. So have some self-compassion, and consider formal mindful eating on retreat and special occasions, as well as informal mindful eating in your daily life.

What I want to offer in this piece is what I call more mindful eating, perhaps "informal" mindful eating as opposed to formal mindful eating. Especially during the craziness and stress and extra food of the holidays, that Halloween to New Years stretch in which are more likely to eat mindlessly than mindfully. Here are six simple guidelines to keep in mind to discern between mindless and (more) mindful eating, and bring our bodies and minds back together.

1) Let your body catch up to your brain

Eating rapidly past full and ignoring your body's signals vs. slowing down and eating and stopping when your body says its full.

Slowing down is one of the best ways we can get our mind and body to communicate what we really need for nutrition. The body actually sends its satiation signal about 20 minutes after the brain, which is why we often unconsciously overeat. But, if we slow down, you can give your body a chance to catch up to your brain and hear the signals to eat the right amount. Simple ways to slow down might just include follow many of your grandmother's manners, like sitting down to eat, chewing each bite 25 times (or more), setting your fork down between bites, and all those old manners that are maybe not as pointless as they seemed. What are some ways you can slow down eating and listen more deeply to your body's signals

2) Know your body's personal hunger signals

Are you responding to an emotional want or responding to your body's needs?

Often we listen first to our minds, but like many mindfulness practices, we might discover more wisdom by tuning into our bodies first. Rather than just eating when we get emotional signals, which may be different for each of us, be they stress, sadness, frustration, loneliness or even just boredom, we can listen to our bodies. Is your stomach growling, energy low, or feeling a little lightheaded? Too often, we eat when our mind tells us to, rather than our bodies. True mindful eating is actually listening deeply to our body's signals for hunger. Ask yourself: What are your body's hunger signals, and what are your emotional hunger triggers?

3) Cultivate a mindful kitchen

Eating alone and randomly vs. eating with others at set times and places.

Another way that we eat mindlessly is by wandering around looking through cabinets, eating at random times and places, rather than just thinking proactively about our meals and snacks. This slows us down for one thing, but prevents us from developing healthy environmental cues about what and how much to eat, and wires our brains for new cues for eating that not always ideal. (do you really want to create a habit to eat every time you get in the car, or other situations?) Sure, we all snack from time to time, but it can boost both your mind and body's health, not to mention greatly helping your mood and sleep schedule to eat at consistent times and places. Yes, that means sitting down (at a table!), putting food on a plate or bowl, not eating it out of the container, and using utensils not our hands. It also helps to eat with others, not only are you sharing and getting some healthy connection, but you also slow down and can enjoy the food and conversation more, and we take our cues from our dinner partner, not over or undereating out of emotion.

Having a mindful kitchen means organizing and caring for your kitchen space so it encourages healthy eating and nourishing gatherings. Consider what you bring into your kitchen and where you put things away. Are healthy foods handy? What kinds of foods are in sight? When food is around, we eat it.

There are many reasons that the raisin eating it is such a powerful exercise, but one is that when we slow down and eat healthy foods like raisins, we often enjoy them more than the story we tell ourselves about healthy foods.

You don't have to plan your food down to each bite, and its important to be flexible especially at special occasions, but just be aware of the fact that you might be changing your eating habits at different times of year or for different occasions. And when you do plan ahead, you are also more likely to eat the amount your body needs in that moment than undereating and indulging later, or overeating and regretting it later.

Classic advice is to also not shop when hungry, but the middle path applies here as well. A psychological effect known as "moral licensing" has shown that shoppers who buy kale are more likely to then head to the alcohol or ice cream section than those who don't. We seem to think that our karma will balance out and we can "spend" it on junk food, or other less than ideal behaviors.

4) Understand your motivations

Eating foods that are emotionally comforting vs. eating foods that are nutritionally healthy.

This is another tricky balance, and ideally we can find nourishing foods that are also satisfying and comforting. But think back to that first mindful raisin. Did that seem appealing before you tried it? There are many reasons that the raisin eating it is such a powerful exercise, but one is that when we slow down and eat healthy foods like raisins, we often enjoy them more than the story we tell ourselves about healthy foods. As we practice eating healthier and a greater variety foods, we are less inclined to binge on our comfort foods, and more inclined to enjoy healthy foods, ultimately finding many foods mentally and physically satisfying as opposed to just a few.

5) Connect more deeply with your food

Considering where food comes from vs. thinking of food as an end product.

Unless you are a hunter-gatherer or sustenance farmer, we have all become ever more disconnected from our food in recent years. Many of us don't even consider where a meal comes from beyond the supermarket packaging. This is a loss, because eating offers an incredible opportunity to connect us more deeply to the natural world, the elements and to each other.

When we pause to consider all of the people involved in the meal that has arrived on your plate, from the loved ones (and yourself) who prepared it, to those who stocked the shelves, to those who planted and harvested the raw ingredients, to those who supported them, it is hard to not feel both grateful and interconnected. Be mindful of the water, soil, and other elements that were part of its creation as you sit down to eat whatever you are eating. You can reflect on the cultural traditions that brought you this food, the recipes generously shared from friends, or brought from a distant place and time to be a handed down in the family.

As you consider everything that went into the meal, it becomes effortless to experience and express gratitude to all of the people who gave their time and effort, the elements of the universe that contributed their share, our friends or ancestors who shared recipes and even the beings who may have given their lives to a part of creating this meal. With just a little more mindfulness like this, we may begin to make wiser choices about sustainability and health in our food, not just for us but for the whole planet.

6) Attend to your plate

Distracted eating vs. just eating

Multitasking and eating is a recipe for not being able to listen deeply to our body's needs and wants. We've all had the experience of going to the movies with our bag full of popcorn, and before the coming attractions are over, we are asking who ate all of our popcorn. When we are distracted, it becomes harder to listen to our body's signals about food and other needs. With your next meal, try single-tasking and just eating, with no screens or distractions besides enjoying the company you are sharing a meal and conversation with.

So while formal mindful eating practices may be what we think of when we look back on a mindfulness course or retreat we attended, the reality is that we do live, and eat, in the real world which is a busy place. But we can take the insights gained from our formal practice- slowing down, listening to our bodies, doing one thing at a time, making even small rituals, and considering all that went into our meal on a more regular basis and bring more informal mindfulness to our daily meals.

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6 Ways to Practice Mindful Eating - Mindful

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Eating as mindfully as we do on retreat or in a mindfulness course is not realistic for many of us, especially with families, jobs, and the myriad distractions around us. This is not to mention that our friends, family and colleagues might not have the patience to eat with us as we take five minutes with each bite.

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Relax your body from head to toe.

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30-Minute Body Scan for Beginners by mindful

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Meditation teacher and voice actor Elaine Smookler leads a mindfulness practice that consists of laying down and placing attention on each area of your body, from head to toe.

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Help you or your students anchor your attention to the breath whenever you think you could use an activity to find steadiness and help you connect to yourself.

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Help you or your students anchor your attention to the breath whenever you think you could use an activity to find steadiness and help you connect to yourself. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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How mindfulness practices can support our ability to focus

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A quick way to connect to your surroundings or yourself is by using your sense of hearing to listen to the different layers of sound around you.

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A quick way to connect to your surroundings or yourself is by using your sense of hearing to listen to the different layers of sound around you. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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Help your students anchor their attention to their breath by having them count their breaths.

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Help your students anchor their attention to their breath by having them count their breaths. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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Practicing focusing means that you notice when your mind is distracted, catch it, and bring it back to whatever you are trying to focus on. In this practice you will focus on something you can feel.

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Practicing focusing means that you notice when your mind is distracted, catch it, and bring it back to whatever you are trying to focus on. In this practice you will focus on something you can feel. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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The audio exercises included with Sitting Still Like a Frog are based on mindfulness-training exercises for adults and developed especially for children and their parents. They form the core of learning to be more mindful at different times throughout the day. You can do the exercises together with your child or children. Some kids like to do the exercises on their own, and many parents love doing the exercises themselves. You can do them sitting on the floor, on a couch or chair, or lying in bed.

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Sitting Still Like a Frog Activity Book Audio

Read by Della Omafray

The audio downloads that accompany Sitting Still Like a Frog Activity Book include yoga exercises, a game that teaches your child how to just listen, and a meditation on the bird of happiness.

To play the audio exercises in your web browser, click the links below. You can also go to SoundCloud directly and download all the tracks to your device or computer.

This exercise strengthens your heart and helps create balance in your body.

Moving like a butterfly strengthens your back and makes your hips supple.

This exercise opens your heart and strengthens your belly muscles.
Track 4: The Little Bowls
Patting your body with your hands will make you feel refreshed.
Track 5: Sound Landscape
Now you are going to hear all kinds of sounds. Can you try to listen to them as though you were hearing them for the first time, without "judging" them and without necessarily trying to recognize them?
Track 6: The Bird of Happiness
To end the book, you can listen to this final meditation, and then draw what you saw while flying with the bird of happiness.

These audio files accompany the book Sitting Still Like a Frog Activity Book, copyright © 2019 by Shambhala Publications, Inc., translated from Calme et attentif comme une grenouille, Ton guide de sérénité. © Éditions des Arènes, Paris, 2017; © Audio script: Eline Snel.

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Read by Della Omafray The audio downloads that accompany Sitting Still Like a Frog Activity Book include yoga exercises, a game that teaches your child how to just listen, and a meditation on the bird of happiness. To play the audio exercises in your web browser, click the links below.

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Sometimes it's easier to be kind to others than it is to be kind to yourself. Learn how to give yourself some loving kindness with this exercise.

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How To Be Kind To Yourself | Guided Meditiation For Kids | Breathing Exercises | GoNoodle

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Practice melting away that icky frozen feeling you get when you're scared, frustrated, or angry.

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This exercise will teach you to turn high, stressful energy off so you can do what you need to do to be your best self.

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Heart Mind Kids

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Making a glitter jar is an activity you can do with your kids to introduce them to how their mind works when experiencing difficult emotions and how to calm down during difficult times. Glitter jars have many names: I've seen them called glitter bottles, mind jars, mindfulness jars, calm bottles or calm down jars, galaxy jars, sparkle bottles, and more! I heard a cute story recently that one little boy called it his "mad jar". No matter what you and your family call them, glitter jars can be a great asset to your family's mindfulness practice.

When the glitter jar is unshaken, the glitter is settled peacefully at the bottom of the jar. You can see clearly through it. The glitter can represent thoughts. When we're feeling angry or upset (shake the bottle), thoughts are swirling around so we aren't able to think clearly. Watch the glitter though, it always settles. And as you watch the glitter settle, notice the mind settling too. When the glitter returns to the bottom of the jar, you will feel more calm and can think more clearly.

This really works best when have your kids make their own bottle. It'll help with buy-in and can be done at almost any age. My daughter was two when we first made a "'parkle jar". I recommend creating a glitter jar with your kids as a fun activity, then explaining to them how this amazing thing they just made can represent their thoughts and feelings, calm them down and help them feel better, and more (see the "Ways to Use a Glitter Jar" section for a few more ideas below).

A mind jar is also featured in the children's book, " Moody Cow Meditates ". In the book, Moody Cow's grandfather helps him make a mind jar after a particularly bad day and shows him how to meditate on the jar until the sparkles settle and so does his mind. The book contains a recipe - although more complex than the one below - and instructions for use.

Glitter Jar Ingredients & Recipe

When I went looking for a recipe for a glitter jar, I came across all kinds of recipes that differed quite a bit. Some called for glycerin, some called for dish soap, others required just water and glitter. I tested a few recipes out and ended up coming up with my own recipe that has ingredients that are easy to find and suspends the glitter in a solution of water and glue that allows the glitter to fall slowly. This, I believe, encourages longer periods of meditation and has a soothing, calming effect.

Jar or bottle
For the jar, I use plastic water bottles so I don't have to worry about glass breaking. For durability and shape, I prefer to use 11.2oz (330ml) Voss Water bottles. The labels peel off fairly easily, but you have to go slowly.

Glue
I really like Elmer's Clear School Glue for my glitter jars. If you're using the 11.2oz bottles I recommend above, one 5oz bottle contains enough glue for about 2 glitter jars.

Glitter
Fine glitter works best. I've used glitter from a glitter sample pack and we added in a few of the larger hearts and stars spangles from this Sugar Sparkles Sample Pack.

Water
Warm water, straight from the tap. With the first glitter jar we ever made, I had microwaved the water to near-boiling and even though it had cooled down a lot by the time we added it to the bottle, I sealed the cap shut while it was still fairly warm. As it cooled, the water contracted and warped the bottle shape a little. (Science!)

Optional
* Food coloring to color the water. One or two drops is more than enough!

* A small funnel for the glitter. Our glitter came in little packets, so I just snipped the corner so the kids could easily pour it into their bottles, but it might be worth it to use a funnel or make a small paper funnel so your kids' glitter goes mostly where they want it!

Now it's time to make your glitter jar!

1. Fill your bottle about 1/8 to 1/3 full with glue. The more glue you add, the longer it will take for the glitter to settle after shaking.

2. Add glitter, start with a tablespoon or so. Take a deep breath as you watch your child pour glitter everywhere but inside the bottle. PS: a slightly damp paper towel wipes up fine glitter pretty well. A vacuum works even better.

3. Fill the bottle the rest of the way with warm water. At this step, before filling the bottle all the way, you can leave a little less than an inch of space at the top of the bottle, cap it, and shake it to see if you want to add more glitter, more glue, or just more water.

4. When the bottle is full up to the neck with water, glitter, and glue, cap it. I recommend using a hot glue gun to seal the cap closed. I did this by applying a single ring of glue all around the top threading and then screwing the cap on.

Ways to Use a Glitter Jar

For Calming
This is why some people call it a "calm bottle" or "calm-down bottle". The swirling glitter is very calming as it falls to the bottom of the bottle, for both kids and adults. If you're feeling agitated, try it for yourself. Shaking the bottle feels just as good as watching the last few specks of glitter fall to the bottom of the bottle. I keep a bottle on my desk in my office.

For Relaxation
In the same way it can calm you when you're agitated, shaking the bottle and watching the glitter settle can further relaxation when you're already calm. My son keeps his at the corner of his bed and uses it when he is getting ready to sleep.

For Learning About the Brain
You can use a glitter jar as a tool to explain how the brain works, in conjunction with the hand model of the brain. When your emotions are rising up, the brain (the bottle) floods with cortisol (the glitter) and you flip your lid (shake the bottle), losing access to the prefrontal cortex, its flexibility and reasoning capabilities. As you breathe, the cortisol dissipates (the glitter settles to the bottom of the bottle) and you feel calmer and the prefrontal cortex comes back online, making it easier to feel calm and make better decisions.

For Mindful Communication
An article in Mindful magazine mentions the whole family can use a glitter jar for mindful communication in the heat of the moment. "We are all upset with lots of thoughts and feelings right now. So let's all take a break until the glitter in the calm-down jar has settled and then start talking again."

Focus-building: Find-It Fun
For a variation, put in one larger piece of metallic confetti in for find-it fun (star, heart, letter of the alphabet, etc). You can even use a googly eye in a pinch. When I was a kid, I had a Where's Waldo glitter wand that had one tiny Waldo and a bunch of glitter and confetti and other things that he blended in with; I spent many afternoons turning and twisting it in search of that one little Waldo. At the time, I didn't know why I liked that thing so much, but now I know that school was emotionally difficult for me, and searching for Waldo in the wand focused my attention into present-moment awareness where the anxiety and worries of the school day lost their power. (I think the Waldo wands have been long discontinued, but if you ever run across one of these for sale, please let me know!)

Focus on Falling Stars
Add several larger pieces of glitter to your glitter jar, like star spangles and after you shake the bottle, pick one to watch. Watch your piece of glitter until you either lose sight of it, or until it falls to the bottom of the jar. Then, choose another to watch.

Question for You

Does your family have a glitter jar, or want to make one? How do you, or how will you use yours? Let us know in a comment below.

{This post contains affiliate links. Thank you.}

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How to Make a Glitter Jar for Mindfulness - Easiest Recipe! - HeartMindKids

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Making a glitter jar is an activity you can do with your kids to introduce them to how their mind works when experiencing difficult emotions and how to calm down during difficult times. Glitter jars have many names: I've seen them called glitter bottles, mind jars, mindfulness jars, calm bottles or calm down jars, galaxy jars, sparkle bottles, and more!

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Kerry Lee MacLean

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children's / teenage personal & social issues: body & health

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juvenile fiction / family / multigenerational

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juvenile fiction / social themes / emotions & feelings

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juvenile fiction / social themes / manners & etiquette

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juvenile fiction / social themes / values & virtues

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personal & social issues: body & health (children's / teenage)

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It all started one stupid, rotten day when everything went wrong... Peter the cow is having a BAD day. After missing the bus and wiping out on his bike he loses his temper and gets in trouble. To make matters worse all the other kids are teasing him, calling him Moody Cow.

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Kerry Lee MacLean

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Thich Nhat Hanh

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a handful of quiet: happiness in four pebbles

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mind & spirit / mindfulness & meditation

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family & relationships / parenting / general

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family & relationships/parenting - general

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A Handful of Quiet: Happiness in Four Pebbles

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A Handful of Quiet presents one of the best known and most innovative meditation practices developed by Thich Nhat Hanh as part of the Plum Village community's practice with children. Pebble meditation is a playful and fun activity that parents and educators can do with their children to introduc...

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Inhale & Exhale

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1) Sit Straight with your spine erect 2) Bring you attention to the tip of your nose 3) Follow the ball - Inhale as the ball ascends, Exhale as the ball descends

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Quick breathing exercise

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Gail Silver

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children's / teenage fiction: general fiction

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children's / teenage personal & social issues: self-awareness & self-esteem

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family & relationships / anger (see also self-help / self-management / anger management)

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juvenile fiction / social themes / emotions & feelings

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juvenile fiction / social themes / manners & etiquette

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juvenile fiction / social themes / self-esteem & self-reliance

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personal & social issues: self-awareness & self-esteem (children's / teenage)

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family & relationships / anger (see also self-help / self-management / anger management)

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juvenile fiction / social themes / emotions & feelings

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juvenile fiction / social themes / manners & etiquette

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juvenile fiction / social themes / self-esteem & self-reliance

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children's / teenage fiction: general fiction

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children's / teenage personal & social issues: self-awareness & self-esteem

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personal & social issues: self-awareness & self-esteem (children's / teenage)

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This wonderful and engaging story gives children and caregivers a concrete practice for dealing with anger and other difficult emotions. In Anh's Anger, five-year-old Anh becomes enraged when his grandfather asks him to stop playing and come to the dinner table. The grandfather helps Anh fu...

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Breathing With a Pinwheel

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Children of all ages can benefit from mindfulness. It can help parents and caregivers, too. Here are tips for children and adults of all ages for how to be more present.

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This series of holds can aid in relaxation by helping you connect with and settle into your body, and into the present moment.

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This series of holds can aid in relaxation by helping you connect with and settle into your body, and into the present moment. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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mistake? In this practice we will explore ways to be kind and curious toward our harshest critic: ourselves!

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Self-compassion: Are you ever hard on yourself when you make a mistake? In this practice we will explore ways to be kind and curious toward our harshest critic: ourselves! This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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Help your students connect to their environment with this five sense awareness practice.

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Help your students connect to their environment with this five sense awareness practice. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.

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The art of stillness:
The place that travel writer Pico Iyer would most like to go? Nowhere. In a counterintuitive and lyrical meditation, Iyer takes a look at the incredible insight that comes with taking time for stillness. In our world of constant movement and distraction, he teases out strategies we all can use to take back a few minutes out of every day, or a few days out of every season. It's the talk for anyone who feels overwhelmed by the demands for our world.

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The place that travel writer Pico Iyer would most like to go? Nowhere. In a counterintuitive and lyrical meditation, Iyer takes a look at the incredible insight that comes with taking time for stillness.

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Take a moment to think of one thing that you can do to have a spectacular day.

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Free activities kids love and teachers request.

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Test how self-compassionate you are

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Please read each statement carefully before answering. To the left of each item, indicate how often you behave in the stated manner, using the following scale:

Score interpretations:

Average overall self-compassion scores tend to be around 3.0 on the 1-5 scale, so you can interpret your overall score accordingly. As a rough guide, a score of 1-2.5 for your overall self-compassion score indicates you are low in self-compassion, 2.5-3.5 indicates you are moderate, and 3.5-5.0 means you are high. Remember that higher scores for the Self-Judgment, Isolation, and Over-Identification subscales indicate less self-compassion, while lower scores on these dimensions are indicative of more self-compassion (these subscales are automatically reverse-coded when your overall self-compassion score is calculated.)
Here are some self-compassion practices you can try now.

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Test how self-compassionate you are | Kristin Neff

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Please read each statement carefully before answering. To the left of each item, indicate how often you behave in the stated manner, using the following scale: Score interpretations: Average overall self-compassion scores tend to be around 3.0 on the 1-5 scale, so you can interpret your overall score accordingly.

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Effective practice

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How to practice more effectively ... for just about anything:

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Help your students anchor their attention to their breath by having them count their breaths.

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Help your students anchor their attention to their breath by having them count their breaths. This recording is part of Little Flower Yoga's Mindful Mondays initiative. Please visit littlefloweryoga.com/programs/mindful-mondays for more information.