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Smart Homes Are Game Changer for People With Disabilities | NBC News

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Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center

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Tell Me a Story: Special Needs Change Family's Look at Life

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http://www.cincinnatichildrens.org/patients/child/special-needs/directory/default/ Diagnosis: cerebral palsy and other health issues Bryce Staverman was born without the part of the brain that controls his gross and fine motor skills. He cannot walk or talk, but he can understand much more than people might think.

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Autism Speaks- sibling

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Autism Speaks is dedicated to increasing awareness of autism spectrum disorders, to funding research into the causes, prevention and treatments for autism, and to advocating for the needs of individuals with autism and their families.

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Navigate Life Texas: Resources for kids with disabilities and special needs

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Online Sibshop Facilitator Training Introducing: The Sibling Support Bracelet! Founded in 1990, the Sibling Support Project is the first national program dedicated to the life-long and ever-changing concerns of millions

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Siblings of Kids with Special Needs
What's the upside of growing up with a sibling with special health or developmental needs?
Siblings of children with special needs have special needs themselves. Their sister or brother with special needs will get a bigger share of attention. While having a special needs sib presents challenges, it also comes with opportunities. Kids who grow up with a sibling with special health or developmental needs may have more of a chance to develop many good qualities, including:

patience

kindness and supportiveness

acceptance of differences

compassion and helpfulness

empathy for others and insight into coping with challenges

dependability and loyalty that may come from standing up for their brother or sister.

What kinds of difficult feelings might a sibling have?
Your child may, at times, have trouble coping with being the sibling of a child with special needs. They may have many different and even conflicting feelings. For example, they may feel:

worried about their sibling

jealous of the attention their brother/sister receives

scared that they will lose their sibling

angry that no one pays attention to them

resentful of having to explain, support, and/or take care of their brother/sister

resentful that they are unable to do things or go places because of their sibling

embarrassed about their sibling's differences

pressure to be or do what their sibling cannot

guilty for negative feelings they have toward their sibling or guilty for not having the same problems.

When parents tune in to the individual needs of each child in the family, they can help ease the difficulties.
What are the red flags, or signs that my child needs more help?
Sometimes the feelings can be so intense or disruptive, that a child may need professional counseling to help them cope. Meeting and talking with other kids going through the same thing can also be very helpful--even if it's just online. Below, you'll find resources to help your family find connections with other siblings going through similar things.
Talk to your doctor if you see any of these warning signs:

changes in eating or sleeping (too much or too little)

physical symptoms like headaches or stomachaches

hopelessness

perfectionism

poor concentration

poor self-esteem

talk of hurting themselves

difficulty separating from parents

loss of interest in activities

frequent crying or worrying

withdrawal

You can expect some degree of sibling rivalry, even when one child has an illness or developmental disability. But sometimes the rivalry crosses the line into abuse. If there is a chance the sibling relationship has become abusive, you should seek professional help. Talk to your health care provider about options.
Some possible signs of sibling abuse are:

One child always avoids their sibling

A child has changes in behavior, sleep patterns, eating habits, or has nightmares

A child acts out abuse in play

A child acts out sexually in inappropriate ways

The children's roles are rigid: one child is always the aggressor, the other, the victim

The roughness or violence between siblings is increasing over time

What are some parenting tips for our family?
You can help your kids better understand what having a sibling with special needs means to your family, and you can also help your kids figure out constructive and appropriate ways to express their feelings and make sure their needs are met.

Sibling issues for some specific health and developmental needs:

Caring for a child with special needs along with all the other demands of work and caring for the rest of the family can be very challenging. If the demands and the stress level are high in your family, it is difficult for everyone. Sometimes family counseling helps. You can also check out YourChild: Children with Chronic Conditions for tips on family coping.
What are some other sources of information and support?

The National Information Center for Children and Youth with Disabilities (NICHCY) News Digest #11 ("Children with Disabilities: Understanding Sibling Issues") delves into issues of siblings of children with special needs. This lengthy digest features several interesting articles, different points of view, suggestions for parents, and reviews research findings.

The Winds of the Hurricane: Siblings in the Storm of Illness, by Joan Fleitas, is an article about siblings of kids diagnosed with a serious illness. She discusses common concerns of siblings and offers suggestions for parents.

Siblings of Children with Chronic Illness and Disability offers a parent's and professional's perspective, and a lengthy resource list (scroll down) with books, Web sites, videos and organizations.

The Sibling Support Project is a national program for brothers and sisters of people with special health and developmental needs. The Project's main goal is to promote peer support and education programs for brothers and sisters of people with special needs. They create books and newsletters to raise awareness, conduct workshops, and sponsor listservs. The website has a great list of books and other resources for children and adults. You can also find local events for siblings of special-needs kids. They also run a listserv just for kids, called SibKids.

SuperSibs! is an organization that supports siblings of kids with cancer. They provide support for siblings, including mailed packages. They also advocate for siblings of kids with cancer with outreach and education efforts.

Find a camp for siblings of kids with cancer.

The Sib Spot on SuperSibs! has stuff for kids, organzized by age group, for siblings ages four to 19!

A fact sheet from the National Resource Center for Respite and Crisis Care Services: Siblings of Children with Special Health and Developmental Needs: Programs, Services and Considerations-with information on understanding the concerns of siblings, creating programs for them and a checklist for agencies.

Siblings for Significant Change is a national network that works to build mutual support for siblings of handicapped persons. They train siblings to be advocates for themselves and their families, and provide networking for support and socializing, quarterly meetings, newsletter, phone network, speakers' bureau, audio-visual material, and local chapters. Write: Siblings for Significant Change, 350 Fifth Ave., Room 627, New York, NY 10118. Call 1-212-643-2663 or 1-800-841-8251.

Please note: The Sibling Information Network no longer exists. You will come across outdated contact information for them at some of the links on this page.

What are some recommended books on parenting siblings of kids with special needs?

Brothers and Sisters: A Special Part of Exceptional Families, by Thomas Powell and Peggy Gallagher.

How to Cope with Mental Illness in Your Family: A Self Care Guide for Siblings, Offspring and Parents, by Diane Marsh, Rex Dickens and E. Fuller Torrey.

When Madness Comes Home: Help and Hope for the Children, Siblings and Partners of the Mentally Ill, by Victoria Secunda.

What are some titles of books for kids about special siblings?
Sometimes reading a book with your child can open up a dialog about issues they are facing. Check out some of these books and see if they help get your kids talking about their feelings and experiences. Below are listed a few titles. Many more books for kids and adults are listed in the Sibling Support Project Store.

Ben, King of the River, by David Gifaldi.
Ages 5-8. Chad, the older brother of a developmentally disabled boy, narrates this story about the family's first camping trip. Chad's frank story-telling gets across the highs and lows of the trip and of life with Ben, and his mixed emotions. Includes a page of tips for siblings of kids with special needs.

Fasten Your Seatbelt: A Crash Course on Down Syndrome for Brothers and Sisters, by Brian Skotko & Susan Levine.
Written for teens who have a brother or sister with Down syndrome. In an easy-to-read, question & answer format, it tackles a broad range of their most common issues and concerns. Find out more.

Written and compiled by Kyla Boyse, R.N. Reviewed by Brenda Volling, Ph.D.

Updated July 2009

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What's the upside of growing up with a sibling with special health or developmental needs? Siblings of children with special needs have special needs themselves. Their sister or brother with special needs will get a bigger share of attention. While having a special needs sib presents challenges, it also comes with opportunities.

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Supporting Siblings of Children with Disabilities

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Lynsey Pearson, MA, LPC-C, discusses how siblings of children with a disability are affected and what can be done to help them.