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He seemed so lively in each picture until he just.. wasn't....

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When I start to think about everything we read on Chris McCandless and his journey as a whole, my emotions are mixed. I learned many positive and negative lessons from McCandless. He was just a lively person who desired a bit of an adventure in everything he did. One positive lesson learned from McCandless was that it is okay to be unique and strive to be different. It is okay to be yourself. A trip like this along with leaving behind his whole lifestyle in order to find his identity and choose freedom, really resonates with me.

A negative lesson learned from McCandless was the truth about families. Chris’ decision to cut down his family was caused by his dad’s infidelity to his mom, his family, and him. This event in his family made him despise them. He did not even think about his sister Carine or his dog Buckley, who he adored, and just decided to cut them ALL off.

Overall, my feelings towards McCandless are mixed. I admire him because he strives to be free and he took on a lifestyle no one has been able to do. Also, he demonstrated the real life incarnation of “different”. However, I despise him in a way for the pain he caused his family. I understand they were not the best but their family had the right to know how he was. To at least know their son was okay. Yet he decided to cut them out and does without ever letting them know he was there. The grief his parents felt is what hurts me in a way. Then again, he didn’t know he was going to die. However, maybe just maybe things would have been different if he hadn’t left his house and walked into the wild.

#RIP  #mixedfeelingsforhim #admiration

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A pic of me with one of the children that I work with at church... there were more in the background but they weren't photogenic :)

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Ever since I remember, the idea of helping others out has always passioned me. When the question, "what do you want to be when you grow up?" was asked my immediate answer was "a teacher". This dream stayed with me but has been a milestone to future goals. My new passion dealt with working with kids. I now strive to become a Speech Therapist for children. However, this goal was also fed by a personal incident in my life. My little sister was diagnosed with a speech impairment at the age of 3 and that process made my life take a 360 turn. I got to see how speech therapists worked with her, with different activities, for a year. I was at every therapy session with her and helped her every step of the way. My inspiration rose when I saw the immense progress my sister had done. She went from not talking at all, to not being able to stay silent. My passion to become a Speech-Language Pathologist combined my love for teaching and the desire to work with children.

I understand that what I do now will affect my future. I have been given the amazing opportunity to help take care of the children at church. I stay with them for hours every Sunday. I don't just take care of them but I create connections.  This experience will help me understand what it is like to be around kids all the time and help me gain experience. This experience has helped me understand what it is like to deal with children, how to understand them and learn how to connect with them as well.

#speechtherapy  #dreams  #workwithkids

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A fatal mistake in nature took Chris´ life....

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Summary: The death of Chris McCandless has still remained a mystery (p2) to Krakauer after 23 years. The starvation (p1) death after surviving 113(p1) days in the wild made Krakauer conduct more research. Krakauer decided to send the wild potato seeds(p4) to a lab in Michigan where a new discovery was shown. After many tests(p9), it was discovered that the seeds contained an amino acid(p9), a toxin that was the cause of Chris' death. This toxin grows on the outside of the potato seed and becomes poisonous. This toxin has been shown to permanently paralyze 100,000 people. This toxin was the source of Chris' slow metabolism(p10) which caused his immobility, starvation, and ultimately his death.

Analysis: This article is eye-opening of the power of a mistake and a seed. This article really made me realize how much a simple mistake can impact your life. A small move or step in the wrong direction can put you in a very vulnerable state. It makes me wonder what would of happened if he would of not made the mistake to eat them. He would of still been here to tell us his story.

#RIP #deadbyplants #fatalmistake

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They visited the place their son first and last entered... 

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Summary: In this chapter, we get to see the aftermath of Chris' death, the reaction of his parents. After ten (pg 201) months of Chris' death, their parents decided it is time to visit (pg 201) the place where their son had painfully died. They had originally decided to drive (201) through the same terrain that Chris had driven/walked by. However, some last-minute changes caused them to take a helicopter (pg 200) instead through the area. This trajectory would have taken Chris 4 days, they arrived in 15 minutes to the bus. Once they arrived, Billie and Walt take turns inspecting the terrain and eventually entering the bus. After they inspected Billie leaves a suitcase with first-aid supplies (pg 202) and Walt places a memorial (202) inside the door in honor of his son. They do this for future hikers to use and, hopefully, eager them to go home and survive.

Analysis: I find this section very difficult to read and not tear up. I am aware and agree that his parents were not the best, especially his father, but that does not strip them off of the grief they have for him. In this part of the book, we can really get an insight into their emotions and grief. I find it so sad that they had to sit in the same bed where their own son had passed. I wonder what passed through their minds, at that moment. To think that if only he would have just stayed home, none of this would have happened. The fact that they brought over supplies for future hikers makes me feel sorrowful. They will never forget their son or get him back but at least they were able to grieve and see the place where their son lived his best life.

#RIPChris  #parentsarehurt  #bus142

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I guess this is goodbye, from McCandless

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Summary: This chapter relies around the theories of McCandless’ extreme starvation death. In the journal that Chris had kept with him many clues were found that helped resolve the mystery. Chris make a mention to wild potato (190) seeds. It had been said that these were seeds (190)found near the bus that were food. After further examination it was concluded that Chris was eating the roots (pg 190) of these plants for months. This caused him to get poisoned (pg 190) from an underlying the roots create in order to protect themselves. This overdose of these seeds poisoned him making him vulnerable. His body started to eat him inside out making his pain dreadful. He left a note (pg 198) knowing that his death was nearby. This note was a goodbye note from McCandless to the world where he confirms he had lived the life he wanted to and was blessed.

Analysis: This chapter is the last sort of devastating information we have on Chris. It answers the question of how but it does not leave that feeling of sadness for him. He was a jerk for making his family suffer but the immense pain he might of felt while he was starving is horrible. He could of survived if he had known that the roots of these plants would change with the seasons. He might of survived some time in order to get rescued by the hikers. But he did not.

#goodbye  #note #theories

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The bus makes its appearance again to show the remains of Chris McCandless

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Summary: In this chapter Krakouer gives us a glimpse into McCandless escapatory routes. These routes or tactics could have prevented his death and taken him back to safety. Krakouer decides to visit the Teklanika River and try to cross it. He soon realizes that the river (pg 173) is extremely dangerous and hard to pass. However, if he had just had a map (pg 173) he could of easily seen that there was an excapotory route miles away. There was a station (pg 173) filled with food and supplies that could of sustained him and not caused his death. There was an escape route consisting of a  cable (pg 173) and basket (pg 174). This method would help him simply zip line across the river into safety.

Analysis: This chapter is greatly devastating to me. It is sad to think that McCandless could of still be living if he had only had a map with him. The usage of the map would of saved his life because he would of seen the escape routes awaiting him. If he had only walked another 20 minutes upward he would of found the basket and he would of been able to reach safety. This is what makes me devastated. I didn’t appreciate what McCandless did but he still has a human. He didn’t deserve to die the way he did and just to think that he had a way out but didn’t know it is hurtful.

#escaperoute  #almostlived  #mapneeded

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Teklanika River was the only thing in between Chris and salvation… 

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Summary: Krakauer decides to continue to talk about Chris’ odyssey (pg 157). Chris leaves for Carthage for the final time and reunites with Jim Gallien. On his trip he goes down the Stampede Trail and finds the bus (pg 163) in which he dies later. He proceeds to explore around the bus and learns to hunt. On one of the occasions he hunts a moose (pg 166), which later becomes spoiled, through which he sustains himself. Through wrong information the moose is prepared wrong and is let to rotten. This devastated McCandless. On one of his hiking (pg 159) trips he arrives at the  Teklanika river. He decides he wants to cross it in order to get to safety given his health and food supply problems. However, this becomes and issue given that the high torrents (pg 163) would kill him which makes him retreat to his bus. Chris is now alone (pg 163) waiting for the tides of the river to subside in order for him to pass.

Analysis: This is a devastating chapter, to be honest. It is sad to think that the only thing getting in his way to safety was a River. However, it also makes it scary to think that the water from the river almost covered up to his neck. The what ifs that we can make from this chapter really are harsh. If he had only found a way to cross the river it would of given him a chance to reach salvation. It’s frustrating that he could of been saved if the times were just right but they were not.

#rivers  #escaperoute?  #bus

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The trail that Krakauer was climbing, almost falling to his death...

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Summary: In this chapter Krakauer tells us his story of his life. He shows and compares how similar he is with Chris Mccandless. They both had issues with their family and their passion of adventures. Krakauer continues to tell us his story and decides to continue his escapade (pg 146) on the thumb. In this chapter he mentions his father and how he taught him the passion of climbing (pg 147). His father’s high expectations (pg 147) of Krakauer revolved around the idea of success (pg 148). His father’s mentality was that of just studying in order to get to the best school, Harvard. He mentions that the messed up relationships they both him and Chris had with their fathers (pg 155) made then similar and unique. He climbs the Death’s Thumb two more times and actually does it the last time.

Analysis: This is a finale to the last chapter. We get to see more of the author which is actually impressive. They really do have some things in common which makes us understand why he would write a book about him. It’s devastating to know that both of them had problems and issues with their families. However this helps us understand why they feel the urge to be free and distant. They both wanted to leave their families because of their loss of connectivity with their fathers which makes me feel sad for them.

#similaritieswchris #deathsthumb #adventure

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The stories and pages are turned as the escalations rises…

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Summary: In this chapter we get to see how Krakauer compares his life experiences to Chris’. He makes a comparison given the last postcard (pg 133) found from McCandless. Ever since he was little, he mentions, he always liked an adventure (pg 134). As he grew older he discovered a passion and love for climbing (pg 134), specifically the Devil’s Thumb. This is a hard climb to do but adventurous for those who enjoy it. He decided to prepare mentally and physically to climb this mountain and get to the summit (pg 135) that was the ultimate goal. However, his terror and fear (pg 143) got the best of him and he went down. After the climb was over he frightfully went down in hopes to get to solid ground the quickest.

Analysis: This chapter really gives an insight into the authors mind. It shows how much he can relate to McCandless. This could explain why he decided to bring his story forward and show that McCandless had reasons to be the way he was. He saw himself through Chris. His way of describing his climb shows or gives an insight to how Chris might of felt. The panic he feels shows that even the toughest get scared. He needed an adventure but his fear got the best of him.

#climbing    #terror   #Devil’sThumb

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Chris and Carine together like always...

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Summary: In this chapter, we get to see Carine Mccandless´ side of the story. She has a mantel (pg127) filled with photographs (pg127) of her and Christopher. She mentions how in each picture she has of him his expression (pg127) is the same, annoyed. He seemed to always have this expression as if he did not want to be photographed. She then mentions the sheepdog (128), Buckely, that Chris adored. She remembers how he insisted on bringing him to his journeys and their parents refused. The day she received the news (pg 130) that Chris had passed away was chaos. Her husband received the news from Carine´s brother, Sam, and forwarded her the message. It was rough. After some time, Corine is the one to pick up Chris´ ashes and belongings. The time after this was rough, as well. The family suffered changes in their appetite (pg 132) due to the grief, they were dealing with. Up to this day, Billie still questions why this all happened and how things would have been different if he would have not taken that risk.

Analysis: This chapter is very vulnerable and gets us to see the emotions that the family has had to go through. Their relationship was not good at all, but it still hurt them. Especially the mother and the sister. Listening to this chapter really helped me resonate and identify myself in it. I understand what they feel but I also have come to the conclusion that it is better to just accept than keep hurting yourself, with questions. Thoughts of all the endless possibilities that could of taken place, instead of his death, is what hurts the most. I think this chapter shows the true grief and pain that the family feels even though the bonds were weak. It was still their family member, their brother, their son.

#RIP #painfromamother #grief

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An education vacation that ended in the uprise of drama…. 

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Summary: After Chris has taken a trip (pg 118) away form his family after his high school graduation, he gets back home to go to college. In this chapter we get to see who Walt McCandless really is. Chris learns that his father had been telling lies (pg 121) to his family for the a long time. In his past he had kept relationships (pg 121) with Chris’ mother and his past wife. He kept 2 lives with 2 families. This created a huge deal of resentment (pg 122) in McCandless towards his father. This made him feel more apart from him and distance himself. Yet he kept on going to college. He kept in silence (pg 123) everything he felt and the secret itself. Although, his mother had gotten over it Chris seemed to just relive it and decided to push his family apart, once and for all. The lie from his father was the last drop that made him burst. He then decided to graduate and leave, leaving his family behind. He left without turning back.

Analysis: This was a lot to take, to be honest. We finally get the answer to the big question: why? I think I finally understand Chris, in a way, as to why he would want to leave his family. His resentment to his father is now understandable. I won’t justify him but I do put myself in his place. I would want to leave and disappear from my family as well. This was a huge lie which is understandable to have had a huge breakdown over it. I sort of feel bad for him and kind of understand him now.

#lies.     #trutharose   #understandhimnow

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A family that seemed United but was not… 

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Summary: In this chapter, we get to see the rest of Chris’ family. We get to see the relationships between Chris and his family. Walt, Chris’ dad, is a control (pg 105) freak. His way of talking and his appearance makes everyone else listen. He did not get along with his son but when he was small he bought Billie, Chris’ mom, a guitar (pg 106) in order for her to soothe Chris as a newborn. In this chapter, we get to see Chris’ adventurous spirit start to take place at a young age. He once left the house, at midnight, at the age of 2 to go to the neighbors house and grab some candy from their drawer. He went all alone (pg 107) and figured out how to leave, for an adventure. On the other side, Walt and Billie had started their company which took a lot of their time. They always spent their time working (ph 107) and that is when Chris and Carine grew closer in bond. She knew him more than anyone. She gave insight into how fearless (pg 109) he had always been when he was small. She mentions how great of a student he was and how an overachiever he was. He always had what he wanted and did things his own way. Always.

Analysis: This chapter makes me extremely sad. Although it is heartwarming to see the special bond between Chris and Carine, it is sad to see how they became so close. The act of their parents always being distant grew their relationship. They understood they had to depend on each other because they were all they had. However, it makes me wonder why did Chris decide to block their family out, if Carine was included. Didn't he love her enough to not hurt her? I would not want to hurt my beloved family member if I had a strong connections with them. This could explain Chris’ way of thinking and living. He has always been alone, without his parents, and needed an adventure. I guess this shows the true side of this parents and why he decided to get away from them.

#insight  #strongbond  #siblingrelationship

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Old Fashioned ways were the tactics used to identify his body. 

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Summary: The story (pg 98) of the hiker who had been found dead was published by The New York Times. After this publication, the police troopers and detectives decided to determine the cause of why he had died (pg 99). Gallien recognized the story given in the news and decided to call in for information. After receiving pictures (pg 99), Gallien was able to confirm Alex's body. His social security number (pg 101) was discovered and his brother (pg 101) Sam was contacted. After the news was given to Sam he had the responsibility to tell his family, including his parents, that their child was dead (pg 102).

Analysis: This chapter makes me sad in all aspects. It is horrible to think about having to view your friend on the news, dead. Not to mention your family member. It gives me relief as well because the mystery of his death was resolved, though. It responds and explains how he was able to be recognized. I find this chapter the shortest yet the most meaningful.

#mysterysolved #RIPChris #whydielikethat?

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Davis Gulch was the admiration of many but the cause of a disappearance…. 

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Summary: More victims/ people with the same mentality of Chris have been around. In this chapter, Krakeur talks about how a man named Everett Ruess. Like Chris, they both decided to start a vagabond (pg 91) journey. Both have some similarities in the way they thought and how they viewed life.  They both were willing to do anything to follow their dreams (pg 96). Both Chris and Ruess were wanderers (pg 90) they liked to live care free and needed their freedom.  Ruess decided to take his journey to Utah were tragically and mysteriously disappeared. Many had speculations of this disappearance. One of which consisted of being a victim of his own innocence (pg 97). A search was only made because of his act of going incommunicado (pg 93) which alerts many. He could of drowned  or simply died of hunger. However whatever the circumstance is, his mentality was the same as Chris. Their love for freedom and nature caused them to lose everything, including their lives.

Analysis: This chapter really makes me wonder how people can have this mentality. I understand the desire to be free but I think that taking a risk of losing their lives would make me take precautions. Is this worth it? Is an adventure worth losing your life? I don’t  think so. This chapter is eye-opening because it shows the different mentalities out there. I will not understand them but I do realize that they have their reasons. Risking it all is honestly a dumb idea. I know I wouldn’t go out into the open knowing I could risk my life. In a way it makes me admire them because not just anyone is willing to do this.

#toofar  #freedom  #isitworthit?

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McCandless stopped usage of his camera was due to it being broken. After this happened he decided to stop writing in his journal, (pg 39) as well. However, he kept on the move. By around October, he had reached Bullhead City, Arizona. He kept in touch with Jan Burres telling her where he was headed and what were his motives. In Bullhead City, he had a job at McDonalds

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Summary: The stampede trail (pg 12) carried a lot of numerous resources including a bus (pg 10), number 142, that served as backcountry shelter for hunters and trappers. Bus 142 was the place where a couple of Alaskan drivers found Christopher´s dead (pg 13) decomposed body. Along with his decomposed body they had found an SOS note (pg 12) in the front of the bus door, from Christopher, pleading for help. An autopsy taken from his body came out to a shocking conclusion. The autopsy determined that Christopher was 67 pounds at the time of his death. The reason for his death was starvation (pg 14).
Analysis:

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Summary: Christopher Mccandless

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I love being outdoors. Feeling the gentle breeze hit my face as I’m wandering in nature is the best feeling. I have always been an outdoor girl. Going to the beach or little lakes are my biggest passion. I love spending time with my family and being able to feel free. Being able to have a cookout and bring beach toys and just sit down and relax is my motivation to go.