# data[].attributes.headline
I'll be the first to say, I ain't for everybody. I know my personality is a bit different. So I might rub people the wrong way catch people off guard. But look, If you ain't feelin me. There's door you can beat it. I ain't for everybody and you might be for me.

# data[].attributes.subject
I'll be the first to say, I ain't for everybody. I know my personality is a bit different. So I might rub people the wrong way catch people off guard. But look, If you ain't feelin me. There's door you can beat it. I ain't for everybody and you might be for me.

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you gotta get messed up sometimes. You gotta get your feelings hurt, you gotta get disappointed, You gotta get told No. You gonna ask somebody for some money, He gonna tell you no. That's just dirt. See you get tripped out because you got dirt on you. But you need dirt on you to develop. Because dirt ain't just dirt. Dirt is fertilizer! Dirt is nutrients! Dirt give you the strength for your seed to push through. see you get mad when haters come your way, you get mad cause you get a setback, you get mad because you get thrown off course, you get mad because you get a detour. THAT'S JUST DIRT! You get mad because they talking about you. THAT'S DIRT! You get mad because you lost your mama. That's dirt. But show me something that has grown into something beautiful that didn't have dirt on it. 

# data[].attributes.subject
you gotta get messed up sometimes. You gotta get your feelings hurt, you gotta get disappointed, You gotta get told No. You gonna ask somebody for some money, He gonna tell you no. That's just dirt. See you get tripped out because you got dirt on you. But you need dirt on you to develop. Because dirt ain't just dirt. Dirt is fertilizer! Dirt is nutrients! Dirt give you the strength for your seed to push through. see you get mad when haters come your way, you get mad cause you get a setback, you get mad because you get thrown off course, you get mad because you get a detour. THAT'S JUST DIRT! You get mad because they talking about you. THAT'S DIRT! You get mad because you lost your mama. That's dirt. But show me something that has grown into something beautiful that didn't have dirt on it. 

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What are you supposed to say when your therapist ask you "How are you". Like clearly I'm in therapy. "Life's so great, can't you see it on my face. I'm a liar, I'm a fake, a mistake. Should of never been born. Line my days with online dates so I don't have to feel what I feel when I'm feeling alone. Stop please wait do not 51/50 me for that thing I said about un-aliving myself. I need a friend who will listen pls. But that's all the time we have this week."

# data[].attributes.subject
What are you supposed to say when your therapist ask you "How are you". Like clearly I'm in therapy. "Life's so great, can't you see it on my face. I'm a liar, I'm a fake, a mistake. Should of never been born. Line my days with online dates so I don't have to feel what I feel when I'm feeling alone. Stop please wait do not 51/50 me for that thing I said about un-aliving myself. I need a friend who will listen pls. But that's all the time we have this week."

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I got paranoia. Hate the way it makes me crazy. I try to ignore ya. I can't help but see the way she's touching you, loving you, fucking you INSIDE MY HEAD! Loving you is torture. I got paranoia baby.

# data[].attributes.subject
I got paranoia. Hate the way it makes me crazy. I try to ignore ya. I can't help but see the way she's touching you, loving you, fucking you INSIDE MY HEAD! Loving you is torture. I got paranoia baby.

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If I popped some pills would you hold my hand for my last breath? If I crashed my car in a ditch, would you get in the ambulance? I used to do be loved by you. Now you don't even call me. It's late and I've been drinkin. It's really got me thinkin. Will you miss me when I'm gone? When I'm 6 ft under baby would you even know what you lost? Will you miss me when I'm gone? Giving flowers to my mother while you're crying with my father. As the congregation sings my final song. Broken and hoping that they got it wrong. Choking on your words you are barely holding on. I was the only one, you could ever love. 

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If I popped some pills would you hold my hand for my last breath? If I crashed my car in a ditch, would you get in the ambulance? I used to do be loved by you. Now you don't even call me. It's late and I've been drinkin. It's really got me thinkin. Will you miss me when I'm gone? When I'm 6 ft under baby would you even know what you lost? Will you miss me when I'm gone? Giving flowers to my mother while you're crying with my father. As the congregation sings my final song. Broken and hoping that they got it wrong. Choking on your words you are barely holding on. I was the only one, you could ever love. 

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Your biggest enemy is you. People don't understand it's you against you. The only person that gets in your way is YOU. Nobody else. It's YOU. I need you to confront you. Because you the one holding you up. I need you to confront you. I need you to look in the mirror and tell you "You are not going to do me like this no more. You are not going to continue to sabotage me. You're NOT. You're not going to keep procrastinating. I need you." 

# data[].attributes.subject
Your biggest enemy is you. People don't understand it's you against you. The only person that gets in your way is YOU. Nobody else. It's YOU. I need you to confront you. Because you the one holding you up. I need you to confront you. I need you to look in the mirror and tell you "You are not going to do me like this no more. You are not going to continue to sabotage me. You're NOT. You're not going to keep procrastinating. I need you." 

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Infinity turned out to be a set number of days. And when you said forever did you mean till seasons change? You really had me fooled I truly thought that you would stay. But I just wasn't "It" for you. A new girl in my place. Beautifully done, I thought I found the one. Damn, you did that. you sure had me at "Infinity." You really got me to believe you would love me for infinity. 

# data[].attributes.subject
Infinity turned out to be a set number of days. And when you said forever did you mean till seasons change? You really had me fooled I truly thought that you would stay. But I just wasn't "It" for you. A new girl in my place. Beautifully done, I thought I found the one. Damn, you did that. you sure had me at "Infinity." You really got me to believe you would love me for infinity. 

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My therapist said to pretend she was my mom and this is what I said. "I guess I should have been more conscious how you talked to me. And when we fight you give me space and don't communicate. And for a while I thought that's what I should appreciate. Maybe I was holding on to what I thought you were. But when I think to hard eventually it starts to hurt. The version of you in my head I realize now wasn't true. Young people fall for the wrong people guess my one was you."

# data[].attributes.subject
My therapist said to pretend she was my mom and this is what I said. "I guess I should have been more conscious how you talked to me. And when we fight you give me space and don't communicate. And for a while I thought that's what I should appreciate. Maybe I was holding on to what I thought you were. But when I think to hard eventually it starts to hurt. The version of you in my head I realize now wasn't true. Young people fall for the wrong people guess my one was you."

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You do not have to attend every argument you are invited to. If you are arguing with someone that you love. The goal should never be to win. The goal should be to find peace, and to solve a problem. And if you are arguing to win against someone that you love, I can bet you that you are going to lose a piece of that relationship with that person. And if you were bad at that before or nobody told you that you didn't have to participate in every argument you are invited to. I forgive you. You are allowed to make mistakes and learn and grow from them. SO as you move forward remember unless you are finding a solution... The one who shouts the loudest is usually the bigger fool. And to one of my friends.... Remember it is okay to start over.... 

# data[].attributes.subject
You do not have to attend every argument you are invited to. If you are arguing with someone that you love. The goal should never be to win. The goal should be to find peace, and to solve a problem. And if you are arguing to win against someone that you love, I can bet you that you are going to lose a piece of that relationship with that person. And if you were bad at that before or nobody told you that you didn't have to participate in every argument you are invited to. I forgive you. You are allowed to make mistakes and learn and grow from them. SO as you move forward remember unless you are finding a solution... The one who shouts the loudest is usually the bigger fool. And to one of my friends.... Remember it is okay to start over.... 

# data[].attributes.headline
Hey, it's me. I really hope you get this. 'Cause lately I've been doing all I can to send this message. Reaching for a hand from anyone who might present it. Asking if they can advise me on how I can find an exit. 'Cause it's been getting dark in here. And I don't want to live in fear... So hey, It's me. I really hope you get this. And call me back as soon as you can because my mind is restless. And it takes everything I have just to pick up the phone. I guess there is no upper hand between burden and alone. See I never really wanna be a buzz kill. But please someone pick up still. Is anyone out there??? 

# data[].attributes.subject
Hey, it's me. I really hope you get this. 'Cause lately I've been doing all I can to send this message. Reaching for a hand from anyone who might present it. Asking if they can advise me on how I can find an exit. 'Cause it's been getting dark in here. And I don't want to live in fear... So hey, It's me. I really hope you get this. And call me back as soon as you can because my mind is restless. And it takes everything I have just to pick up the phone. I guess there is no upper hand between burden and alone. See I never really wanna be a buzz kill. But please someone pick up still. Is anyone out there??? 

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I tell you that I'm whole but I'm still healing. I tell you that I'm happy but I'm grieving. Thought I was a fighter, But I'm still in the fire. But if I'm being honest... I'm not being honest. I'll give you roses just hoping you don't see the weeds in my garden. If I'm being honest... I'm at my darkest... I'm sitting here waiting and praying for someone to show me what love is.... 

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I tell you that I'm whole but I'm still healing. I tell you that I'm happy but I'm grieving. Thought I was a fighter, But I'm still in the fire. But if I'm being honest... I'm not being honest. I'll give you roses just hoping you don't see the weeds in my garden. If I'm being honest... I'm at my darkest... I'm sitting here waiting and praying for someone to show me what love is.... 

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This the last time I let somebody steal my peace. If you ain't adding to my plate then baby you can't eat. Don't be acting like you know me when we hardly speak. A lot of people come and go but it wont be me. You can't break me. I just take control of my emotions and my actions. I won't lose sleep if you don't have my back. But don't you try to fake with me because you can't take that back. Cutting people out the picture yeah you might get cropped. And I don't carry dead weight so you gonna get dropped. Had to learn myself now I'm so protective. I don't waste my time trynna prove myself.  I can't please you so much that I lose myself. I have tried everything it's time to choose myself. 

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This the last time I let somebody steal my peace. If you ain't adding to my plate then baby you can't eat. Don't be acting like you know me when we hardly speak. A lot of people come and go but it wont be me. You can't break me. I just take control of my emotions and my actions. I won't lose sleep if you don't have my back. But don't you try to fake with me because you can't take that back. Cutting people out the picture yeah you might get cropped. And I don't carry dead weight so you gonna get dropped. Had to learn myself now I'm so protective. I don't waste my time trynna prove myself.  I can't please you so much that I lose myself. I have tried everything it's time to choose myself. 

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The reason I got attached so fast is because you made me feel something after being numb for so long.... I don't wanna talk about it.

# data[].attributes.subject
The reason I got attached so fast is because you made me feel something after being numb for so long.... I don't wanna talk about it.

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I'm sorry that you couldn't see that I as good enough. I'm sorry that you didn't think that I was worth your love. Some day you are gonna realize just how much you screwed up. But I'll be gone. The day you finally realize you were wrong. 

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I'm sorry that you couldn't see that I as good enough. I'm sorry that you didn't think that I was worth your love. Some day you are gonna realize just how much you screwed up. But I'll be gone. The day you finally realize you were wrong. 

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Imagine being with someone were you could be your fucking ugliest...  And all they did was look at you and go "I still love you" I want to experience the real depth of love. A place of a space of safety. Where I can just be dark, be messy, be ugly, bring all my neurotic and chaotic shit to the surface. Which is apart of me. And they just sit there and go "Baby, there ain't nothing that you can do that will rock me. I love you. Let it out. I'm holding you. Let it out. You are safe. You are safe. Express. Get it out." Because here's what happens sooner or later my ugliness starts to die. Because that ugliness gets excepted. And then it gets transcended into what it is which is just unresolved light. If I scream and yell and carry on. And you just go "I'm here, I'm here, I'm here, I'm here, I'm here." My little girl inside will go "Omg, He's not going." 

# data[].attributes.subject
Imagine being with someone were you could be your fucking ugliest...  And all they did was look at you and go "I still love you" I want to experience the real depth of love. A place of a space of safety. Where I can just be dark, be messy, be ugly, bring all my neurotic and chaotic shit to the surface. Which is apart of me. And they just sit there and go "Baby, there ain't nothing that you can do that will rock me. I love you. Let it out. I'm holding you. Let it out. You are safe. You are safe. Express. Get it out." Because here's what happens sooner or later my ugliness starts to die. Because that ugliness gets excepted. And then it gets transcended into what it is which is just unresolved light. If I scream and yell and carry on. And you just go "I'm here, I'm here, I'm here, I'm here, I'm here." My little girl inside will go "Omg, He's not going." 

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This is for all my friends... You can tell me all your problems. I can't promise that I'll solve them. But I promise that you're still worth my time. And you trust me so you know I wont brush it off like nothing. Please don't walk away, and say that you're fine. Tell me whats on your mind. 

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This is for all my friends... You can tell me all your problems. I can't promise that I'll solve them. But I promise that you're still worth my time. And you trust me so you know I wont brush it off like nothing. Please don't walk away, and say that you're fine. Tell me whats on your mind. 

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If you never get married. YOU ENOUGH. If you never pass that law degree. YOU ENOUGH. If you never become a doctor. YOU ENOUGH. If you never have a child. YOU ARE ENOUGH LIKE YOU ARE. 

# data[].attributes.subject
If you never get married. YOU ENOUGH. If you never pass that law degree. YOU ENOUGH. If you never become a doctor. YOU ENOUGH. If you never have a child. YOU ARE ENOUGH LIKE YOU ARE. 

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Don't start things and not finish them. You don't quit. There is nothing that comes out of quiting besides knowing that you didn't finish. We finish everything. You start it, Finish it. If you gonna do it, Do it to try and be the best. Not be better than other people. Be the best for you. 

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Don't start things and not finish them. You don't quit. There is nothing that comes out of quiting besides knowing that you didn't finish. We finish everything. You start it, Finish it. If you gonna do it, Do it to try and be the best. Not be better than other people. Be the best for you. 

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Dear parents, I am a teenager. I don't get the grades you want me to. I don't act like you want me to, I get attitude at unexpected times. I don't talk like you want me to. I don't listen to the music you want me to. I don't dress like you want me to. You always think I'm ungrateful. You make me feel as if I'm not worth it. The things you say hurt me. The things you say are not always accurate. I am only a teenager for a little. Let me go have fun. Let me have sleepovers. Let me go with friends to Starbucks. Let me use my phone when I'm bored. Let me go to the mall with friends. Don't yell at me for every little thing I do. I am a teenager.

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Dear parents, I am a teenager. I don't get the grades you want me to. I don't act like you want me to, I get attitude at unexpected times. I don't talk like you want me to. I don't listen to the music you want me to. I don't dress like you want me to. You always think I'm ungrateful. You make me feel as if I'm not worth it. The things you say hurt me. The things you say are not always accurate. I am only a teenager for a little. Let me go have fun. Let me have sleepovers. Let me go with friends to Starbucks. Let me use my phone when I'm bored. Let me go to the mall with friends. Don't yell at me for every little thing I do. I am a teenager.

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Here are some codes y'all can use with me

# data[].attributes.subject
Here are some codes y'all can use with me

# data[].attributes.body
618: You wanna die
119: You are great
075: You hate life
365: Lost a loved one
000: Suicidal thoughts
057: You are being bullied or harassed
745: Self confidence issue

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I need a second to breath. I need a second for me. They say it gets easy that's something I do not believe. You're hurting me now while my hearts on my sleeve. We need some space cause I know it won't work... You said you loved me but you left me hurt. Saying one thing and then do the whole opposite soon as it all because work.

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I need a second to breath. I need a second for me. They say it gets easy that's something I do not believe. You're hurting me now while my hearts on my sleeve. We need some space cause I know it won't work... You said you loved me but you left me hurt. Saying one thing and then do the whole opposite soon as it all because work.

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If happy ever after did exist... Nobody would need a therapist. All these fucking hate crimes make me sick. I think it's time we just let people live. 

# data[].attributes.subject
If happy ever after did exist... Nobody would need a therapist. All these fucking hate crimes make me sick. I think it's time we just let people live. 

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I wish I could look at myself in the mirror without being disgusted at what I see. I can tell my friends to be strong and to love themselves... but I can't do it for myself. I feel worthless like I don't deserve to be loved.

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I wish I could look at myself in the mirror without being disgusted at what I see. I can tell my friends to be strong and to love themselves... but I can't do it for myself. I feel worthless like I don't deserve to be loved.

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Yeah, you're cute. But can you handle my over thinking? Can you handle my constant need for reassurance? Can you handle me thinking you don't like me 24/7? Can you handle my CONSTANT NEED for attention? 

# data[].attributes.subject
Yeah, you're cute. But can you handle my over thinking? Can you handle my constant need for reassurance? Can you handle me thinking you don't like me 24/7? Can you handle my CONSTANT NEED for attention? 

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To lazy to commit suicide. So I just watch the day pass hoping TO DIE.

# data[].attributes.subject
To lazy to commit suicide. So I just watch the day pass hoping TO DIE.

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I'm alright, I'm okay. Lying to myself just to make it through the day. Sun still shines on my face. But what's inside my head would scare the devil away. Fell like a burden asking you to stay.... but I've been living in the darkest place.... But will you stay? Don't leave me alone. Don't leave me alone here with myself. Cause this ain't a home. This cage made of bones. And my head's a prison cell. Everyday a living hell. That no one sees. I would rather be with anyone but me. Don't leave me here alone with myself. 

# data[].attributes.subject
I'm alright, I'm okay. Lying to myself just to make it through the day. Sun still shines on my face. But what's inside my head would scare the devil away. Fell like a burden asking you to stay.... but I've been living in the darkest place.... But will you stay? Don't leave me alone. Don't leave me alone here with myself. Cause this ain't a home. This cage made of bones. And my head's a prison cell. Everyday a living hell. That no one sees. I would rather be with anyone but me. Don't leave me here alone with myself. 

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When they chose her over you... Welp now that was a lot of damage. WOOO

# data[].attributes.subject
When they chose her over you... Welp now that was a lot of damage. WOOO

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I think I feel more relieved when no one remembers I exist. Because the butterflies in my stomach has flown through my heart and are stuck in my throat. And I think for once I'm okay with being alone. No one cares when you cry... They are only there when you smile. Sometimes I wanna revers it all back to when I was a child. Dealing with scared knees instead of scared wrist. Not feeling the urge to crash my bike. Will you remember me when I'm gone? The city is so busy yet no one can see the tears on my cheeks. Because I painted them blue so they would blend in.

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I think I feel more relieved when no one remembers I exist. Because the butterflies in my stomach has flown through my heart and are stuck in my throat. And I think for once I'm okay with being alone. No one cares when you cry... They are only there when you smile. Sometimes I wanna revers it all back to when I was a child. Dealing with scared knees instead of scared wrist. Not feeling the urge to crash my bike. Will you remember me when I'm gone? The city is so busy yet no one can see the tears on my cheeks. Because I painted them blue so they would blend in.

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Why am I always listening to music? Because every time I think I take 10 damage. And every thought I have makes me wanna die :)

# data[].attributes.subject
Why am I always listening to music? Because every time I think I take 10 damage. And every thought I have makes me wanna die :)

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If I give you my heart you'll get it all. It's a long way down when I fall. If I'm gonna go down this road again... I don't know how to love like it's gonna end. I'm gonna love you to pieces. When you are up there in the stars. Gonna love you like there is nobody else but us 2. When you are down there in the dark. If you ever need someones open arms. If you ever wanna fall apart. I'm gonna love you to pieces. Even when you break my heart. 

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If I give you my heart you'll get it all. It's a long way down when I fall. If I'm gonna go down this road again... I don't know how to love like it's gonna end. I'm gonna love you to pieces. When you are up there in the stars. Gonna love you like there is nobody else but us 2. When you are down there in the dark. If you ever need someones open arms. If you ever wanna fall apart. I'm gonna love you to pieces. Even when you break my heart. 

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I have an anxious attachment style and it's like this... I convince myself you no longer want me if it takes a couple hours for you to text back. Even though you said you loved me when you left this morning. And I know that you could never change your mind that fast. I start to panic and miss you already the moment that you walk out the door. Then I hate myself cause I know I'm being needy so not only am I sad but I'm also insecure. I'm scared of falling in love again cause when I'm attached I hate who I am. Obsessive codependent suffocating and I get exhausted just existing in my brain. Maybe I'm the issue maybe I'm the one to blame. The reason my relationships  went up in fucking flames. I was overbearing all along that was the problem they all started to hate me because of how much I loved them.

# data[].attributes.subject
I have an anxious attachment style and it's like this... I convince myself you no longer want me if it takes a couple hours for you to text back. Even though you said you loved me when you left this morning. And I know that you could never change your mind that fast. I start to panic and miss you already the moment that you walk out the door. Then I hate myself cause I know I'm being needy so not only am I sad but I'm also insecure. I'm scared of falling in love again cause when I'm attached I hate who I am. Obsessive codependent suffocating and I get exhausted just existing in my brain. Maybe I'm the issue maybe I'm the one to blame. The reason my relationships  went up in fucking flames. I was overbearing all along that was the problem they all started to hate me because of how much I loved them.

# data[].attributes.headline
So tell me I'm a waste of love. Tell me that I'm not enough. Say you hope I see the truth that I won't find no one like you. Tell me you don't care no more. When you know I can't let go. Beat my heart all black and blue. Because it ain't half as bad as what I put you through.

# data[].attributes.subject
So tell me I'm a waste of love. Tell me that I'm not enough. Say you hope I see the truth that I won't find no one like you. Tell me you don't care no more. When you know I can't let go. Beat my heart all black and blue. Because it ain't half as bad as what I put you through.

# data[].attributes.headline
When I woke up this morning I kissed you. Then I thought why on earth am I with you. Then you left for an hour and I missed you. Then you said something that made me kinda wanna kill you. I'm a little mad, but I'm not crazy. It's just a mood swing. Honey don't freak out if I go up, well I'll come back down.  One minute I'll be happy then I'm crying. But isn't flying through the air kind of exiting? Oh boring well at least I'm not that. Gonna get a little good, gonna get a little bad. Just a normal roller coaster of emotions, baby won't you buckle up, strap in. All it is is a mood swing. 

# data[].attributes.subject
When I woke up this morning I kissed you. Then I thought why on earth am I with you. Then you left for an hour and I missed you. Then you said something that made me kinda wanna kill you. I'm a little mad, but I'm not crazy. It's just a mood swing. Honey don't freak out if I go up, well I'll come back down.  One minute I'll be happy then I'm crying. But isn't flying through the air kind of exiting? Oh boring well at least I'm not that. Gonna get a little good, gonna get a little bad. Just a normal roller coaster of emotions, baby won't you buckle up, strap in. All it is is a mood swing. 

# data[].attributes.headline
Machine gun Kelly once said "Sometimes you can love somebody or something so much that people will think you're crazy. The thing is most people love the wrong things. In the world where everyone wants millions of dollars and likes on the internet. There was a boy who gave up everything because all he wanted was her." I felt that way to hard bro.

# data[].attributes.subject
Machine gun Kelly once said "Sometimes you can love somebody or something so much that people will think you're crazy. The thing is most people love the wrong things. In the world where everyone wants millions of dollars and likes on the internet. There was a boy who gave up everything because all he wanted was her." I felt that way to hard bro.

# data[].attributes.headline
It was you when we first met eyes. It was you in the city lights. It was you when I almost lost control. It was you through the darkest times. It was you that would make me shine. It was you that I hold on tight. It's always been you. So let the doors just open wide. Cause standing there is my whole life. I've waited long enough. To finally say I do. 

# data[].attributes.subject
It was you when we first met eyes. It was you in the city lights. It was you when I almost lost control. It was you through the darkest times. It was you that would make me shine. It was you that I hold on tight. It's always been you. So let the doors just open wide. Cause standing there is my whole life. I've waited long enough. To finally say I do. 

# data[].attributes.headline
I think that I'm loveless. I'm scared that I've got no heart. No one's showed me what love is. So I picture the end when I start. I don't know why I'm bad at love. I'm so good at it when I'm alone. I just find a way to mess it up. Another heart break to walk me home. I've learned to build up trust issues. I get self-conscious about my looks. I run away the minute I'm in love. I still don't know how to love myself. So how can I love someone else. I'm terrified I'll always be alone. 

# data[].attributes.subject
I think that I'm loveless. I'm scared that I've got no heart. No one's showed me what love is. So I picture the end when I start. I don't know why I'm bad at love. I'm so good at it when I'm alone. I just find a way to mess it up. Another heart break to walk me home. I've learned to build up trust issues. I get self-conscious about my looks. I run away the minute I'm in love. I still don't know how to love myself. So how can I love someone else. I'm terrified I'll always be alone. 

# data[].attributes.headline
Why do I feel like the "enough" girl. Like I'm good enough to hook up with, but not good enough to be in a relationship with. I'm good enough for short term, But not good enough for long term. I'm good enough to be a bridesmaid, but not good enough to be a wife. I'm good enough to make him better for the next one, but not enough for him. Like I'm good... but I'm just not enough. You feel me? 

# data[].attributes.subject
Why do I feel like the "enough" girl. Like I'm good enough to hook up with, but not good enough to be in a relationship with. I'm good enough for short term, But not good enough for long term. I'm good enough to be a bridesmaid, but not good enough to be a wife. I'm good enough to make him better for the next one, but not enough for him. Like I'm good... but I'm just not enough. You feel me? 

# data[].attributes.headline
She takes a lot of selfies but she doesn't know herself. Shes very down at worth but she wants to leave the world. She feels that life is over cause she's always overwhelmed. She reminds me of myself, I just hope that she gets help. Because people see her scars the don't understand her battles. Just like people see the stars they don't know how far they traveled. From a kid she was an adult. She had to learn her battles. She been hiding in the shadows of the trauma she can't handle. smiles in all her socials cries behind her photos. If only you could see things that she doesn't post. But look a little closer you can see that she is broken. Always posting that she is coping but is actually dying slowly. Cause she hates the way she feels over thinking makes her ill. Now she's drinking every weekend and she's trynna numb the feels. But nothing seems to work, nothing numbs the hurt. Because when she wakes up in the morning everything still seems to hurt. She the type of girl that will give you the whole world. But her mental health makes her wanna die sometimes. She the type of girl that forgets about herself. And she always trys to smile even when she wants to cry. She the type of girl that will never ask for help.

# data[].attributes.subject
She takes a lot of selfies but she doesn't know herself. Shes very down at worth but she wants to leave the world. She feels that life is over cause she's always overwhelmed. She reminds me of myself, I just hope that she gets help. Because people see her scars the don't understand her battles. Just like people see the stars they don't know how far they traveled. From a kid she was an adult. She had to learn her battles. She been hiding in the shadows of the trauma she can't handle. smiles in all her socials cries behind her photos. If only you could see things that she doesn't post. But look a little closer you can see that she is broken. Always posting that she is coping but is actually dying slowly. Cause she hates the way she feels over thinking makes her ill. Now she's drinking every weekend and she's trynna numb the feels. But nothing seems to work, nothing numbs the hurt. Because when she wakes up in the morning everything still seems to hurt. She the type of girl that will give you the whole world. But her mental health makes her wanna die sometimes. She the type of girl that forgets about herself. And she always trys to smile even when she wants to cry. She the type of girl that will never ask for help.

# data[].attributes.headline
To my best friend, This one's for you. If one day I lose my battle with depression, I want you to know I made it this far because of you. Some of the most amazing memories I have I shared with you. Some of the most amazing laughs I had, I shared with you. Some of the stupidest adventures I had I shared with you. And some of my darkest moments I shared with you. But you were always there for me. Never judged me. And always a shoulder for me to cry on. I apologize in advance. For the pain I might cause you. When and IF that day comes that, I do lose my battle with depression. But I love your stupid ass so much. 

# data[].attributes.subject
To my best friend, This one's for you. If one day I lose my battle with depression, I want you to know I made it this far because of you. Some of the most amazing memories I have I shared with you. Some of the most amazing laughs I had, I shared with you. Some of the stupidest adventures I had I shared with you. And some of my darkest moments I shared with you. But you were always there for me. Never judged me. And always a shoulder for me to cry on. I apologize in advance. For the pain I might cause you. When and IF that day comes that, I do lose my battle with depression. But I love your stupid ass so much. 

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I don't know how I'm still alive. I'm killing myself inside. I guess that God decides. Someone give me a light! Tar on my tongue, smoke in my lungs, That's not what's killing me. Damned by the damage caused my panic that won't let me breath. I GOT NOTHING LEFT ANYMORE!! But my cigarettes in the morning.

# data[].attributes.subject
I don't know how I'm still alive. I'm killing myself inside. I guess that God decides. Someone give me a light! Tar on my tongue, smoke in my lungs, That's not what's killing me. Damned by the damage caused my panic that won't let me breath. I GOT NOTHING LEFT ANYMORE!! But my cigarettes in the morning.

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Wanna know my biggest fear? It's not dying. It's not heights. It's not planes, It's not spiders. It's the thought of losing you. Because you are really important to me. And quite frankly I can't imagine a life without you. So can you do me a promise. Stay in my life forever... Even though you already left.  

# data[].attributes.subject
Wanna know my biggest fear? It's not dying. It's not heights. It's not planes, It's not spiders. It's the thought of losing you. Because you are really important to me. And quite frankly I can't imagine a life without you. So can you do me a promise. Stay in my life forever... Even though you already left.  

# data[].attributes.headline
I want you but.... I'm choosing to stay quite, do my things and let you do yours. I'll let the universe decide because I'm tired of chasing. 

# data[].attributes.subject
I want you but.... I'm choosing to stay quite, do my things and let you do yours. I'll let the universe decide because I'm tired of chasing. 

# data[].attributes.headline
If you are dating someone with depression. She is going to be tired constantly. Don't let her stay in bed all day. She's not gonna wanna eat, make her food anyways. She's gonna wanna cancel plans just to go home and watch Netflix. Take her out dancing anyway. She will look like she ain't in the mood to be silly. Try to make her laugh anyways. She is going to want to cry over spilled coffee. Don't make it seem like it's not a big deal or that she's being dramatic. She is going to be happy and sad at the same time, and I know that sounds crazy but it's the truth. She is going to need constant reassurance that she is beautiful. Tell her. She is going to need constant reassurance that you're not leaving her. She isn't doubting your love, depression comes with anxiety. It comes with no appetite, sleeping 10 hours and waking up tired. It comes with the illusion of standing in a room with hundreds of people and being seen by none of them. It doesn't make sense it's impossible to understand. But imagine how they feel. Fighting a constant internal battle. So be that support system. Reassure and love hard. Never give up on her.

# data[].attributes.subject
If you are dating someone with depression. She is going to be tired constantly. Don't let her stay in bed all day. She's not gonna wanna eat, make her food anyways. She's gonna wanna cancel plans just to go home and watch Netflix. Take her out dancing anyway. She will look like she ain't in the mood to be silly. Try to make her laugh anyways. She is going to want to cry over spilled coffee. Don't make it seem like it's not a big deal or that she's being dramatic. She is going to be happy and sad at the same time, and I know that sounds crazy but it's the truth. She is going to need constant reassurance that she is beautiful. Tell her. She is going to need constant reassurance that you're not leaving her. She isn't doubting your love, depression comes with anxiety. It comes with no appetite, sleeping 10 hours and waking up tired. It comes with the illusion of standing in a room with hundreds of people and being seen by none of them. It doesn't make sense it's impossible to understand. But imagine how they feel. Fighting a constant internal battle. So be that support system. Reassure and love hard. Never give up on her.

# data[].attributes.headline
People keep telling me I should be more like my big sister so yeah.... Big sister did you mean to make it hard on me? You are the favorite that everyone wants me to be. Same hair, Same eyes, but I don't feel as bright. Walking in the shadows of your light. I wanna be like you... But in my own way. I wanna shine like you, but it's hard to say... I wanna scream out at the top of my lungs. And chase down who I can become not be some version of you. And if I fall flat right on my face at least I'll know that it's my own mistake. So when they look at the family picture I won't just be the little sister. 

# data[].attributes.subject
People keep telling me I should be more like my big sister so yeah.... Big sister did you mean to make it hard on me? You are the favorite that everyone wants me to be. Same hair, Same eyes, but I don't feel as bright. Walking in the shadows of your light. I wanna be like you... But in my own way. I wanna shine like you, but it's hard to say... I wanna scream out at the top of my lungs. And chase down who I can become not be some version of you. And if I fall flat right on my face at least I'll know that it's my own mistake. So when they look at the family picture I won't just be the little sister. 

# data[].attributes.headline
("Yu-Yi") "The longing to feel things intensely again; as if somewhere along the way, you simply forgot what it's like to be passionate."

# data[].attributes.subject
("Yu-Yi") "The longing to feel things intensely again; as if somewhere along the way, you simply forgot what it's like to be passionate."

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What the fuck, we really suck. At basic human rights. A women should choose what goes on between her fucking thighs. It's funny how the men in power want to legislate against the bodily autonomy of the women they impregnate. Here'a my take, let's fucking make it legal for women to make the choice and have a voice. It's not a fucking sin. I can't believe we're still fighting this fucking bigotry. I thought we left this bs back in 1973. 

# data[].attributes.subject
What the fuck, we really suck. At basic human rights. A women should choose what goes on between her fucking thighs. It's funny how the men in power want to legislate against the bodily autonomy of the women they impregnate. Here'a my take, let's fucking make it legal for women to make the choice and have a voice. It's not a fucking sin. I can't believe we're still fighting this fucking bigotry. I thought we left this bs back in 1973. 

# data[].attributes.headline
I did it, I did. I jumped. I stepped right off that cliff, without a parachute. I looked over the edge and saw the view of something I could never do. And no part of me knew how but the moment came and it had to be now so.... I did it, I did. I jumped. I stepped right off that cliff, without a parachute. 

# data[].attributes.subject
I did it, I did. I jumped. I stepped right off that cliff, without a parachute. I looked over the edge and saw the view of something I could never do. And no part of me knew how but the moment came and it had to be now so.... I did it, I did. I jumped. I stepped right off that cliff, without a parachute. 

# data[].attributes.headline
Wooooo this about to be a rant and I don't even wanna waste your time go ahead and leave this pad and unlike it. Because I'm pro-choice. PRO-MY DAMN SELF. And ANTI ANYBODY that hates women. I say because they are trynna overturn abortions, men that don't want to be fathers should be ordered to stay in the house and maintain a healthy household. Men that don't wanna be in the house should give over their rights and be arrested. And people say women need to be held accountable. Let me make something clear. Women have been held accountable so much so we have accountability spilling over. That could be given to men. We live in a world were a man can say mmmm not really ready to be a father and dip out. Well y'all get child support. RIGHT 20% of their income.... so if they don't make an income or their income is under the table.... Well thats a conversation y'all ain't ready for. Some people say it's not fair to punish the men it's the government  thats trying to control womens bodies. Right but unfortionatly nobody ever gives a fuck unless it negitivly impacts men. Some people say women can use pertection too. But the question is who is responsible for when birth control and condoms DON'T WORK. Because they are not full proof. All I'm saying if you wanna control more womens bodies then more concequinces have to be given to men. Because child support and 2 weekends out of the month ain't nothing compared to raising a child! If raising a child was that easy more people would do it. Women have to be held accountable but it's wildly exceptable for men to get rid of their responcibilities and disapear. but if a women didn't feel like raising a child that she had brought onto this earth to sayyyyy peruse her dreams. She would be attacked, by everybody from every angle. Before you say well everyone should be having safe sex. I ALREADY SAID THAT. and most men say well it feels good. It doesn't matter if it feels good bc women should make that hard decision and say NO if we aren't doing safe sex we won't do it at all. RIGHT Women more accountability. In the even that she does make the hard decision and say no and the man doesn't wanna take no for an answer, then what well I guess she's a mother now. And have to deal with whatever concequinces come her way. Things shouldn't be done like we are in 1922 because we are in 2022 and things ain't the same. Men struggle with raising families because they aren't the soul bread winner anymore. A lot of them ain't even got a CRUMB. And I'm not bitter about shit and I've never had an abortion... But I know women and teens who have. And it's not a fun and easy decision. And a lot of the times they have to make that choice by themselves. Rather you are pro-choice or pro-life, that part really don't even matter. It's taking away our right to choose. And the more time goes on the more rights we will be stripped of. But hey I'm not an old white man if you wanna take away our rights, TAKE EM. But more than just women need to be held accountable. If women are forced to be mothers, men should be forced to be fathers. And it takes more to being a father than just finances. And if you are pro-life then thats amazing I would never condemn somebody for MAKING A CHOICE. But with that same breath open your wallets, homes, and heart to these children. You ever seen a mother or a father whos behaviour you really didn't quite agree with and though mmm this person should not be a parent. RIGHT.

# data[].attributes.subject
Wooooo this about to be a rant and I don't even wanna waste your time go ahead and leave this pad and unlike it. Because I'm pro-choice. PRO-MY DAMN SELF. And ANTI ANYBODY that hates women. I say because they are trynna overturn abortions, men that don't want to be fathers should be ordered to stay in the house and maintain a healthy household. Men that don't wanna be in the house should give over their rights and be arrested. And people say women need to be held accountable. Let me make something clear. Women have been held accountable so much so we have accountability spilling over. That could be given to men. We live in a world were a man can say mmmm not really ready to be a father and dip out. Well y'all get child support. RIGHT 20% of their income.... so if they don't make an income or their income is under the table.... Well thats a conversation y'all ain't ready for. Some people say it's not fair to punish the men it's the government  thats trying to control womens bodies. Right but unfortionatly nobody ever gives a fuck unless it negitivly impacts men. Some people say women can use pertection too. But the question is who is responsible for when birth control and condoms DON'T WORK. Because they are not full proof. All I'm saying if you wanna control more womens bodies then more concequinces have to be given to men. Because child support and 2 weekends out of the month ain't nothing compared to raising a child! If raising a child was that easy more people would do it. Women have to be held accountable but it's wildly exceptable for men to get rid of their responcibilities and disapear. but if a women didn't feel like raising a child that she had brought onto this earth to sayyyyy peruse her dreams. She would be attacked, by everybody from every angle. Before you say well everyone should be having safe sex. I ALREADY SAID THAT. and most men say well it feels good. It doesn't matter if it feels good bc women should make that hard decision and say NO if we aren't doing safe sex we won't do it at all. RIGHT Women more accountability. In the even that she does make the hard decision and say no and the man doesn't wanna take no for an answer, then what well I guess she's a mother now. And have to deal with whatever concequinces come her way. Things shouldn't be done like we are in 1922 because we are in 2022 and things ain't the same. Men struggle with raising families because they aren't the soul bread winner anymore. A lot of them ain't even got a CRUMB. And I'm not bitter about shit and I've never had an abortion... But I know women and teens who have. And it's not a fun and easy decision. And a lot of the times they have to make that choice by themselves. Rather you are pro-choice or pro-life, that part really don't even matter. It's taking away our right to choose. And the more time goes on the more rights we will be stripped of. But hey I'm not an old white man if you wanna take away our rights, TAKE EM. But more than just women need to be held accountable. If women are forced to be mothers, men should be forced to be fathers. And it takes more to being a father than just finances. And if you are pro-life then thats amazing I would never condemn somebody for MAKING A CHOICE. But with that same breath open your wallets, homes, and heart to these children. You ever seen a mother or a father whos behaviour you really didn't quite agree with and though mmm this person should not be a parent. RIGHT.

# data[].attributes.headline
Fuck it when I die I wanna go to hell, because I'm a piece of shit. 

# data[].attributes.subject
Fuck it when I die I wanna go to hell, because I'm a piece of shit. 

# data[].attributes.headline
My anger is big and complex. And it lives just below the serface. I find myself getting LIVID at inanimate objects. See the people closes to me see my anger. But when I get out into the world were it's not safe, I'm quite. I fantasize about getting pissed and standing up for myself. But that it, it's just a fantasy. I never actually do anything. Unless I'm standing up for somebody else. And then I just let out my anger. But it never feels good... See the thing with my anger is I use it for other people but I use it against myself. There is nobody I'm more angry at than myself. There's no one I hate more than myself. 

# data[].attributes.subject
My anger is big and complex. And it lives just below the serface. I find myself getting LIVID at inanimate objects. See the people closes to me see my anger. But when I get out into the world were it's not safe, I'm quite. I fantasize about getting pissed and standing up for myself. But that it, it's just a fantasy. I never actually do anything. Unless I'm standing up for somebody else. And then I just let out my anger. But it never feels good... See the thing with my anger is I use it for other people but I use it against myself. There is nobody I'm more angry at than myself. There's no one I hate more than myself. 

# data[].attributes.headline
This is just a PSA if you're the type of guy that thinks you should be able to control what your girl wears. Hunny the only thing you should be keeping under control is the amount of times you tell women in bed oh this has never happened to me before. And youre the type of guy that will tell a women like me go put on some clothes and get a real job. Does that mean I can tell you to take off that bucket hat because that hair line HAS gone into early retiarment.  And tell me again why I should have to cover up my skin, in order to hide your insecurities. that would be like asking Labron not to wear his champion ring bc you never made varsity basketball (Too soon?).  You'll say it's embaressig to take a women out thats wearing something revealing. but it's not embaressing for you to reveal that you need a spoon to twarl your pasta. And you only took 5%. And when defending your little points you'll say things like well at least I don't see my body and then you join the military. And it's weaird because the way we look is the exact reason you do the song and dance to get our attention in the first place. Was my body ever a wonderland or just some territory for you to control and conquor? So listen, I know you like to act like you wrote the book on women but lets be honest any man that says he knows exactly how to read a women is always illiterate!

# data[].attributes.subject
This is just a PSA if you're the type of guy that thinks you should be able to control what your girl wears. Hunny the only thing you should be keeping under control is the amount of times you tell women in bed oh this has never happened to me before. And youre the type of guy that will tell a women like me go put on some clothes and get a real job. Does that mean I can tell you to take off that bucket hat because that hair line HAS gone into early retiarment.  And tell me again why I should have to cover up my skin, in order to hide your insecurities. that would be like asking Labron not to wear his champion ring bc you never made varsity basketball (Too soon?).  You'll say it's embaressig to take a women out thats wearing something revealing. but it's not embaressing for you to reveal that you need a spoon to twarl your pasta. And you only took 5%. And when defending your little points you'll say things like well at least I don't see my body and then you join the military. And it's weaird because the way we look is the exact reason you do the song and dance to get our attention in the first place. Was my body ever a wonderland or just some territory for you to control and conquor? So listen, I know you like to act like you wrote the book on women but lets be honest any man that says he knows exactly how to read a women is always illiterate!

# data[].attributes.body
Ash: 50/10

Yumi: 5/10

Ghost: -000/10

Minx: 3/10

Ed: -000/10

Niko: 7/10

Bowie: -000/10

Bunny: 7/10

Harley: 9999999999999999999999/10

Tre: -00000000/10

Sato: 5/10

CJ: 7/10

Oba: -0000000000000/10

Des: 5/10

Milo: 3/10

Nikki: 7/10

Karma: 5/10

Kyle: 3/10

Kana: -999999999/10

Gray: 4/10

Blue: 5/10

King: 3/10

# data[].attributes.headline
My anxiety it kills me, I feel this. My depression really something hard to deal with. Got this discomfort in my heart I don't know why. It will tear me apart but I don't cry. If you love me then why the fuck it don't show? Every star might shine but well I don't. And people keep telling me not to give in but they don't know I don't wanna live no more. I just wanna feel better but I can't relax. I'm still living in the past. All the times I was at my low points, I didn't know what to do. I really thought I had love but I'm really broken.

# data[].attributes.subject
My anxiety it kills me, I feel this. My depression really something hard to deal with. Got this discomfort in my heart I don't know why. It will tear me apart but I don't cry. If you love me then why the fuck it don't show? Every star might shine but well I don't. And people keep telling me not to give in but they don't know I don't wanna live no more. I just wanna feel better but I can't relax. I'm still living in the past. All the times I was at my low points, I didn't know what to do. I really thought I had love but I'm really broken.

# data[].attributes.headline
If a fetus was a baby people could write it off on their taxes. Meaning every pregnant person would have gotten an extra 3800 on their refund this year. If a fetus was a baby I could take a life insurance policy I don't want. meaning every pregnant person who has had a miscarriage would be entitled to that policies amount. If a fetus was a baby then every pregnant person would have gotten an extra stimulus check for them.But they didn't. If a fetus was a baby every single state would have a law about harming a pregnant person was child abuse and killing one would be double homicide. If a fetus was a baby that would mean that every pregnant person would be entitled to more food benefits. If a fetus was a baby every family with a pregnant person would have an extra member thus bumping them up in household size for tax purposes, Medicaid purposes, and for really any state or government assistance. If a fetus is a baby a pregnant person would qualify for more rooms with a substadized housing. But they don't. If a fetus was a baby a pregnant person working would be breaking some sorta child labor law. A fetus isn't a baby though. Not in our eyes, and certainly not in the governments. You just wanna control the reproductive rights of women and afab people

# data[].attributes.subject
If a fetus was a baby people could write it off on their taxes. Meaning every pregnant person would have gotten an extra 3800 on their refund this year. If a fetus was a baby I could take a life insurance policy I don't want. meaning every pregnant person who has had a miscarriage would be entitled to that policies amount. If a fetus was a baby then every pregnant person would have gotten an extra stimulus check for them.But they didn't. If a fetus was a baby every single state would have a law about harming a pregnant person was child abuse and killing one would be double homicide. If a fetus was a baby that would mean that every pregnant person would be entitled to more food benefits. If a fetus was a baby every family with a pregnant person would have an extra member thus bumping them up in household size for tax purposes, Medicaid purposes, and for really any state or government assistance. If a fetus is a baby a pregnant person would qualify for more rooms with a substadized housing. But they don't. If a fetus was a baby a pregnant person working would be breaking some sorta child labor law. A fetus isn't a baby though. Not in our eyes, and certainly not in the governments. You just wanna control the reproductive rights of women and afab people

# data[].attributes.headline
Kinda hurt, but it's okay :) no reason to be hurt. Just feeling this way. 

# data[].attributes.subject
Kinda hurt, but it's okay :) no reason to be hurt. Just feeling this way. 

# data[].attributes.headline
I know what you all are trying to say. "PINK WHY DON'T YOU JUST LEAVE?!" and my response would be "When your taste in men is as bad as mine, They don't just go away quietly... They'd slash your tires, and kill your dog, and tell you the music you like ain't real music.... They would abuse you repeatedly and they'd kill your spirit. And use the fact that you have a history of suicide attempts against you. And all the cruelty...  Tears you apart after a while. 

# data[].attributes.subject
I know what you all are trying to say. "PINK WHY DON'T YOU JUST LEAVE?!" and my response would be "When your taste in men is as bad as mine, They don't just go away quietly... They'd slash your tires, and kill your dog, and tell you the music you like ain't real music.... They would abuse you repeatedly and they'd kill your spirit. And use the fact that you have a history of suicide attempts against you. And all the cruelty...  Tears you apart after a while. 

# data[].attributes.headline
Quote of the day: It all comes down to the last person you think about at night. That is where your heart is. 

# data[].attributes.subject
Quote of the day: It all comes down to the last person you think about at night. That is where your heart is. 

# data[].attributes.headline
You don't feel at all, I feel everything. And you won't even talk, while I just wanna scream. Cause how the hell did I end up in love with a machine..

# data[].attributes.subject
You don't feel at all, I feel everything. And you won't even talk, while I just wanna scream. Cause how the hell did I end up in love with a machine..

# data[].attributes.headline
Why don't you break my heart again for the hell of it? Drawn to the pain that you cause I think I'm addicted. I think I might overdose, take the rope, pull the chair, let me go. 

# data[].attributes.subject
Why don't you break my heart again for the hell of it? Drawn to the pain that you cause I think I'm addicted. I think I might overdose, take the rope, pull the chair, let me go. 

# data[].attributes.headline
I wont lie to you.... I don't wish you well. I wish the taste of me on your tongue. I wish the sound of my laugh in your ears. I wish the scent of my skin in your nose. I wish the sight of me wanting you in your eyes, every time you close them. I wish the feel of me in your arms, on your fingertips, across your body. I don't wish you well, I wish you would come to your senses. 

# data[].attributes.subject
I wont lie to you.... I don't wish you well. I wish the taste of me on your tongue. I wish the sound of my laugh in your ears. I wish the scent of my skin in your nose. I wish the sight of me wanting you in your eyes, every time you close them. I wish the feel of me in your arms, on your fingertips, across your body. I don't wish you well, I wish you would come to your senses. 

# data[].attributes.headline
And I'm not saying we were perfect, I hope that one night with her is worth it. But telling me that it was a mistake don't make it hurt less. When did you fall out of love? When did we run out of time? You said you saw it coming but I never saw the signs. Because they all told me there would come a day when your heart runs away and I fall to the floor. Because I'm just not someone that you want anymore. Since you walked out the door. And it was never meant to end like this. 

# data[].attributes.subject
And I'm not saying we were perfect, I hope that one night with her is worth it. But telling me that it was a mistake don't make it hurt less. When did you fall out of love? When did we run out of time? You said you saw it coming but I never saw the signs. Because they all told me there would come a day when your heart runs away and I fall to the floor. Because I'm just not someone that you want anymore. Since you walked out the door. And it was never meant to end like this. 

# data[].attributes.headline
Mama when I die please hold in your cry... Just know that when I'm gone, I'll always be right by your side. And the person that I love, when I leave I know that we hardly speak. I'm sorry that I failed you. But you meant the world to me. 

# data[].attributes.subject
Mama when I die please hold in your cry... Just know that when I'm gone, I'll always be right by your side. And the person that I love, when I leave I know that we hardly speak. I'm sorry that I failed you. But you meant the world to me. 

# data[].attributes.headline
My mind is a prison, and I'm trapped in the routine that I live with. Because all that I've given has taken it's toll on my life. I've been there before and I'll be there again. I can't escape these thoughts that make the prison in my head. 

# data[].attributes.subject
My mind is a prison, and I'm trapped in the routine that I live with. Because all that I've given has taken it's toll on my life. I've been there before and I'll be there again. I can't escape these thoughts that make the prison in my head. 

# data[].attributes.headline
I wonder who I would have been if I hadn't been put through what I did when I was still riding with training wheels. I wonder what I would have looked like if I wasn't tought to hate the girl in the mirror when I should have only hated the vegetables on my plate. I wonder what I would have sounded like if I wasn't whispered hateful words when I was supposed to be sung lullabies. I wonder what I would have loved if I wasn't tought choas was comfort, when I was learning how to read off empty bottles instead of cereal boxes. And I wonder what I would be dreaming of if my real reality wasn't a nightmare. And the monsters where only supposed to be under my bed and in my closet. You tell me my childhood trauma made me stronger and that my pain makes me who I am... But the truth is that my trauma broke me and now I'm forced to pick up all the broken pieces and and rewire my brain. Because those around me couldn't keep the little girl who shouldn't have needed to be strong, safe. 

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I wonder who I would have been if I hadn't been put through what I did when I was still riding with training wheels. I wonder what I would have looked like if I wasn't tought to hate the girl in the mirror when I should have only hated the vegetables on my plate. I wonder what I would have sounded like if I wasn't whispered hateful words when I was supposed to be sung lullabies. I wonder what I would have loved if I wasn't tought choas was comfort, when I was learning how to read off empty bottles instead of cereal boxes. And I wonder what I would be dreaming of if my real reality wasn't a nightmare. And the monsters where only supposed to be under my bed and in my closet. You tell me my childhood trauma made me stronger and that my pain makes me who I am... But the truth is that my trauma broke me and now I'm forced to pick up all the broken pieces and and rewire my brain. Because those around me couldn't keep the little girl who shouldn't have needed to be strong, safe. 

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How it is to date a love deprived person.... 1 They need constant pure communication. 2 They start to overthink when you don't talk to them. 3 They get quiet when they get hurt because they don't want to upset anyone. 4 They tend to blame themselves when things go wrong.... 5 They are very sensitive about their weaknesses. 6 They go to great lengths to please others but not themselves. 7 They find it easy to forgive and accept, but not forget. 8. They tend to need more love than usual people

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How it is to date a love deprived person.... 1 They need constant pure communication. 2 They start to overthink when you don't talk to them. 3 They get quiet when they get hurt because they don't want to upset anyone. 4 They tend to blame themselves when things go wrong.... 5 They are very sensitive about their weaknesses. 6 They go to great lengths to please others but not themselves. 7 They find it easy to forgive and accept, but not forget. 8. They tend to need more love than usual people

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Sugar and spice and everything nice, that's what little girls are made of. But sugar's too sweet and sometimes and sometimes my feet look better when they aren't in high heels. But snips and snails and puppy dog tails are to harsh on my pale complexion. You asked what I am and I told you not ma'am but sir doesn't quite feel right either. And I like feeling pretty, though handsome makes me ditty. I think I would rather be both. But I was born as a lady and that's all they'll ever see me. besides I'm neither spice nor snails.

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Sugar and spice and everything nice, that's what little girls are made of. But sugar's too sweet and sometimes and sometimes my feet look better when they aren't in high heels. But snips and snails and puppy dog tails are to harsh on my pale complexion. You asked what I am and I told you not ma'am but sir doesn't quite feel right either. And I like feeling pretty, though handsome makes me ditty. I think I would rather be both. But I was born as a lady and that's all they'll ever see me. besides I'm neither spice nor snails.

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Would you be my life gaurd if I was drowing? Would you be my therapist if I just need to talk? Would you ride for me? Die for me? Show me you won't lie to me. Would you do all that for me? 

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Would you be my life gaurd if I was drowing? Would you be my therapist if I just need to talk? Would you ride for me? Die for me? Show me you won't lie to me. Would you do all that for me? 

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The prom queen looked so pretty the day I went to prom. But still inside she hates her life. And all the boys on varsity well their dads don't treat them right. The quiet girl in the corner has so much more to say. If only their minds weren't so damn broken. She's the life of every party but she sits alone at lunch... Her reflection shows her ribcage but she thinks she weighs to much. And they call eachother bestfriends, when it's a forbidden crush. One that their parents would never accept. Isn't it sad they way it works? That we think we're the only ones who hurt. So just breath for a second. I know you are feeling so damn helpless. But before you do something reckless remember magazines have editors and makeup can hide all the hurt. Don't cry because you aren't them. I'm staying up all night scars to cover her body. And everything seems fine when it's not yours. 

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The prom queen looked so pretty the day I went to prom. But still inside she hates her life. And all the boys on varsity well their dads don't treat them right. The quiet girl in the corner has so much more to say. If only their minds weren't so damn broken. She's the life of every party but she sits alone at lunch... Her reflection shows her ribcage but she thinks she weighs to much. And they call eachother bestfriends, when it's a forbidden crush. One that their parents would never accept. Isn't it sad they way it works? That we think we're the only ones who hurt. So just breath for a second. I know you are feeling so damn helpless. But before you do something reckless remember magazines have editors and makeup can hide all the hurt. Don't cry because you aren't them. I'm staying up all night scars to cover her body. And everything seems fine when it's not yours. 

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I've always wondered why I like the villians more... and I think it might be because when they get on the floor down on their knees for her... and only her...  something in me stirs. A hero would sacrifice her to save the world showing that they were indeed pure hearted. But a villain would tear apart the world if she was hurt. That is a promise. They are selfish and manipulative and rude to everyone around you. But he treats her like a queen. That is his and only his sitting at the thrown with her crown. I think villans are misjudged and most of the time you don't get to see their story. Because if we knew the hero may not seem as heroic. Monsters are made not born. The villain was torchered and used and abused and evedintly... didn't get time to morn. So next time I defend the villain of the tail remember that one time they too were broken and frail.

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I've always wondered why I like the villians more... and I think it might be because when they get on the floor down on their knees for her... and only her...  something in me stirs. A hero would sacrifice her to save the world showing that they were indeed pure hearted. But a villain would tear apart the world if she was hurt. That is a promise. They are selfish and manipulative and rude to everyone around you. But he treats her like a queen. That is his and only his sitting at the thrown with her crown. I think villans are misjudged and most of the time you don't get to see their story. Because if we knew the hero may not seem as heroic. Monsters are made not born. The villain was torchered and used and abused and evedintly... didn't get time to morn. So next time I defend the villain of the tail remember that one time they too were broken and frail.

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I can not erase your problems... But I'll be there when it's hard. I know you're scared of falling. But fall into my arms. I won't be too far.

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I can not erase your problems... But I'll be there when it's hard. I know you're scared of falling. But fall into my arms. I won't be too far.

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You don't know the hell I've been through. You don't know the price I've paid. You can't see the walls I'm building... Time I'm facing... all my insecurities. Every bit of little girl I once was and every bit of love that I could have... All the other fear I have. And nobody has helped me. I'm not cold I'm empty. Somebody heal me, hold me, make me feel whole. But no one can love me. 

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You don't know the hell I've been through. You don't know the price I've paid. You can't see the walls I'm building... Time I'm facing... all my insecurities. Every bit of little girl I once was and every bit of love that I could have... All the other fear I have. And nobody has helped me. I'm not cold I'm empty. Somebody heal me, hold me, make me feel whole. But no one can love me. 

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You twisted every word I ever said. Now the truth is tangled up inside my head. You fuck up again and then you blame me. You keep telling people that I'm crazy. Maybe I am.... I'm the one that's coming back for more. Your just breaking me not any laws. Look at me tell me that I'm pretty... Swear you'd never hit me... I wish you would. Because if there was blood upon the floor. And I could see your fit come for my face. Maybe then I wouldn't have to fight no more. In this phycological war. If there were bruises on my skin.... ANd they could see the pain you put me in again... Maybe then I wouldn't have to love no more...

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You twisted every word I ever said. Now the truth is tangled up inside my head. You fuck up again and then you blame me. You keep telling people that I'm crazy. Maybe I am.... I'm the one that's coming back for more. Your just breaking me not any laws. Look at me tell me that I'm pretty... Swear you'd never hit me... I wish you would. Because if there was blood upon the floor. And I could see your fit come for my face. Maybe then I wouldn't have to fight no more. In this phycological war. If there were bruises on my skin.... ANd they could see the pain you put me in again... Maybe then I wouldn't have to love no more...

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I am how I am from the damage and the hurt. You gotta understand that nobody put me first. Every flower need some dirt. I took a second and learned my worth... Except he don't love me and it still hurts. 

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I am how I am from the damage and the hurt. You gotta understand that nobody put me first. Every flower need some dirt. I took a second and learned my worth... Except he don't love me and it still hurts. 

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I no long entertain him, I don't know why I did at first. Why'd I give him my attention? How'd I overlook the signs? I realize that I still love him and he's the type of gentlemen that holds the door when I'm walking in. Makes me feel like I'm a queen. Not some fucking backup plan. Call me traitor call me phony, but he left me and I still want him. He's a real man a good person. 

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I no long entertain him, I don't know why I did at first. Why'd I give him my attention? How'd I overlook the signs? I realize that I still love him and he's the type of gentlemen that holds the door when I'm walking in. Makes me feel like I'm a queen. Not some fucking backup plan. Call me traitor call me phony, but he left me and I still want him. He's a real man a good person. 

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If she flinches when you go to put your arm around her someones elses hands weren't as sweet. If she questions you, someone else lied to her. If she doesn't tell you things, someone else once betrayed her secrets. 

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If she flinches when you go to put your arm around her someones elses hands weren't as sweet. If she questions you, someone else lied to her. If she doesn't tell you things, someone else once betrayed her secrets. 

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If I could unlove you I would have by now. If I could unkiss your lips, and never know how good it was... If I could unfeel your fingertips maybe then I'd feel okay. I've been up for day not able to drink a single thing. Trying to unremember every little thing. Trying to hit delete on you and me. But I don't know how to... So yeah if I could unlove you I would have done it by now. If I could unwant you I wouldn't be so sad. Calling you up every day. Hoping you're gonna pick up. Because the one thing I can't do is unlove you.

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If I could unlove you I would have by now. If I could unkiss your lips, and never know how good it was... If I could unfeel your fingertips maybe then I'd feel okay. I've been up for day not able to drink a single thing. Trying to unremember every little thing. Trying to hit delete on you and me. But I don't know how to... So yeah if I could unlove you I would have done it by now. If I could unwant you I wouldn't be so sad. Calling you up every day. Hoping you're gonna pick up. Because the one thing I can't do is unlove you.

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Well, the story unfolds with how I was raised. To do what I'm told by a man. Who wrinkled my clothes. And folded my arms back to beat out my soul. I had to love him because the family loved him. I never told them what he did I just let it go. I thought he deserved the love that he couldn't show... And I was born to wear the bruises on my throat... 

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Well, the story unfolds with how I was raised. To do what I'm told by a man. Who wrinkled my clothes. And folded my arms back to beat out my soul. I had to love him because the family loved him. I never told them what he did I just let it go. I thought he deserved the love that he couldn't show... And I was born to wear the bruises on my throat... 

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If you tell me you are leaving I'll make it easy. It will be alright... If we can't stop the bleeding, we don't have to fix it. You don't have to stay. I will love you either way. 

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If you tell me you are leaving I'll make it easy. It will be alright... If we can't stop the bleeding, we don't have to fix it. You don't have to stay. I will love you either way. 

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I will play the waiting game. I will live my life. Go on dates, develope a crush, kiss a boy. But I will always wait. We aren't oil and water. Nobody sees it from my perspective nobody sees the way i looked at you from the seat next to yours. The way I can still tell your emotions from the way you say my name and the way we laughed when I lost my common sense. Nobody saw the way you pushed my hand down when I started anxiously biting my nails... The way you used to hold me when I was angry... The way you know your voice calms me down. Nobody saw the way we complemented each other.... They only saw our messy portfolio. We looked like messy ruins, crumbled building that chip away when the wind blows, broken masterpieces that only hold out dated memories. If only people had seen our core then and only then would they have understand why I wait... so game on.

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I will play the waiting game. I will live my life. Go on dates, develope a crush, kiss a boy. But I will always wait. We aren't oil and water. Nobody sees it from my perspective nobody sees the way i looked at you from the seat next to yours. The way I can still tell your emotions from the way you say my name and the way we laughed when I lost my common sense. Nobody saw the way you pushed my hand down when I started anxiously biting my nails... The way you used to hold me when I was angry... The way you know your voice calms me down. Nobody saw the way we complemented each other.... They only saw our messy portfolio. We looked like messy ruins, crumbled building that chip away when the wind blows, broken masterpieces that only hold out dated memories. If only people had seen our core then and only then would they have understand why I wait... so game on.

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𝕀'𝕄 𝔹𝔸ℂ𝕂𝕂𝕂𝕂𝕂!! 

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𝕀'𝕄 𝔹𝔸ℂ𝕂𝕂𝕂𝕂𝕂!! 