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So, cards on the table, I wrote a similar movie a few years ago. Now I know this is in no way copied or stolen, just a case of different writers with similar ideas. I prefer mine, but hey, I would, right? Having said that, I enjoyed this film, the hippo looks great. 3/5

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I'm often asked what the worst film I've ever seen is, well, now I have a definitive answer. This . 1/5

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It drags a little at the beginning but this is a capable and atmospheric creature feature. The practical monster veers a little into obvious puppet territory at times, but it's great to see a monster that's actually THERE. 3/5

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Another great installment to the reinvigorated franchise, this is quite possibly the meanest, nastiest Evil Dead yet. The only downside is that none of the characters were particularly likeable, so I wasn't overly fussed as to who, if anyone, would survive. Some brutal kills and jaw-dropping shots almost make up for this, though. 4/5

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There are some very interesting concepts floating about in this slick-looking, if tonally jumbled outing from Netflix. A family and everyone else on the planet find themselves mysteriously trapped in their house after an unearthly and unabating rain. It goes to places you wouldn't expect but doesn't really linger on any of these aspects long enough to make them truly interesting. 3/5

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I may have been lured in with the promise of Barbara Crampton, but I stayed for the gloriously cheesy murder puppets. 3/5

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There's a definite lesson to be learnt here, as in when to leave well enough alone. The original writer/director of The Last Shift remakes his own movie in a bigger-budget affair that somehow manages to be inferior to the original in every single way. 3/5

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Take out the decent-looking shark and Kathryn Newton, and this would sit firmly in the MEH... category. It's okay but instantly forgettable, and you'll never think about it again. 2/5

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Following on from the groundbreaking original, this utterly dire remake is so bad that it's almost good in places. Throwing most of the lore of the original out the window, we are left with this confused, jumbled mess. 2/5

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This glossy, slick remake looks great, mostly, but it lacks the magic that made the original so great. Darker themes and a more aggressive Freddy make for a mediocre remake. 3/5

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A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 2010 movie poster

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It's iconic for a reason. Easily one of the most important horror movies of all time and arguably Craven's greatest work. 5/5

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A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 1984 movie poster

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If you like a little sunshine with your zombies, then you'll love angelic kindergarten teacher Miss Caroline as she tries to protect her little charges through a zombie outbreak at a farm. 3/5

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More EVil Dead than Mummy, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Some great gross-out scenes and a genuinely disturbing story lie buried beneath some middling SFX and really stupid parenting choices. 3/5

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A decent enough flick with a pretty cool gimmick and some gnarly kills. Everything is competent and well executed but lacks any real bite. 3/5

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I enjoyed this one thoroughly!! Owen and Watts are great as always. The film is tense and builds to a fabulous ending. Well directed by Twyker who wrings every ounce of tension from the well constructed plot!! 4/5

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I enjoyed this one. Anything from Spielberg is worth watching for me and although this doesn't reach the heights it's still pretty damn good. Great performances and cast, fantastic photography and direction. Have a watch!! 3/5

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On of the best from one of the greats. This thriller from Hitchcock follows two men who meet randomly on a train and swap murders. The final scenes at the fairground are just amazing!! 4/5

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One of the most surprising films I've seen in years. This is unexpected fun and brimming with character, charm and the two leads are just magnificent. Go in cold with this one and let it wash over you. Such fun!! 5/5

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This one took me by surprise. Gary Cooper in his last great role is great, but this film belongs to Lee J Cobb. One of the most impactful fist fights I've ever seen and Anthony Mann's typical darker edge make this one a banger!! 4/5

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his is a fantastic thriller from Alan Clarke documenting the investigation into the nurder of civil rights activists in the Deep South. Great performances from Defoe and Hackman and Clarke's direction is stellar!! 5/5

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Fantastic submarine thriller with an amazing cast. Watching Rock Hudson and Patrick McGoohan spar is an absolute joy and some excellent miniature work which still stands up. Great stuff!! 4/5

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Beautifully realised in terms of design but something tonally off for me. Some of the humour feels poorly placed and Adam feels a little too goofy. Props to Guy Hendrix Dyas for the production design though!! 2/5

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Superior intelligence thriller made by one of my personal favs Steven Soderburgh. A stellar cast, twist and turns, this is everything you want from a spy thriller. 4/5

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This is wonderfully crafted tale of two brothers running a small Italian restaurant. Directorial debut of Stanley Tucci, the cast is wonderful, the story is gentle and heartfelt and personally I think it's one of the best films made about the love of food. 4/5

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This is an incredibly bleak tale about a French apartment building that is one night surrounded by a black, deadly void. Rather than dwell on the whys and hows, the film knuckles down on the residents and how they survive cut off from the world. There are some distracting time jumps, but seeing the years take their toll on these people and the things they do to survive is fascinating. A fantastic concept, executed in a mediocre fashion. 3/5

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This one is worth sticking with; it's not great by any means, but nothing will prepare you for the Koala King! 2/5

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Well, this was something. A super no-budget Japanese homage to the Evil Dead Franchise. What it lacks in budget, acting, and cinematography, it more than makes up for with spirit and enthusiasm. 3/5

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This one has an interesting, documentary style which makes for an intriguing watch. It does sometimes veer into literal slapstick comedy at moments that feel somewhat jarring. 2/5

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Well, to be honest, I didn't go into this expecting much, and you shouldn't either. 1/5

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Classic B-Movie brilliance here as horny sea monsters besiege a coastal town in search of breeding stock. It's all played straight as an arrow, which just makes it even more camp. 3/5

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Ah man, this one was a lot of fun. Feels more like a Nightmare on Elm Street than the original Prom Night. A horny teen returns from the dead to get revenge in this wonderfully batshit sequel. 3/5

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A laughable, inept killer stalks a group of largely unlikeable teens at their Prom as vengeance for past injustices. Jamie Lee Curtis elevates this just above the rest but this is more comical than scary. 2/5

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Probably best remembered (by me at least), for The Raft, in which a bunch of the most unlikeable teenagers ever are trapped on a wooden float by a waterborne version of The Blob. 3/5

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Nothing spectacular here, low budget, small scale, but the acting is okay, especially amongst the younger cast. The concept is good, but never really given time to be fleshed out. 2/5

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Ah man, this one was so much fun. A struggling streamer tries to spend the night in a haunted house to boost his views, and pretty much everything goes wrong. Think Blair Witch with a healthy dose of Evil Dead 2. 4/5

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There's no real story here; bad things happen to people, there are some cool shots, but otherwise nothing here that's worth your time. 1/5

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How exciting can it be watching a bunch of assholes stuck in an elevator? Surprisingly so as it turns out. There are enough twists and turns to keep you watching, even if the final revelation is oh so predictable. 3.5

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Visually stunning with a wonderful cast, but I couldn't help finding this a little hollow. The spectacle was undeniable, but scratch the surface, and there isn't much underneath. Still it's an enjoyable film and worth a watch. 3/5

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It took me a while to gel with this one, some of the acting is so bad it actually grates on you, however, there is a really cool plot twist that lifts this just above mediocrity. 3/5

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After rewatching and enjoying the original, I learned there was a sequel and thought I'd check it out. I regret that decision. Like its antagonist, this should remain unseen. 1/5

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Equally humorous and terrifying, this multi-layered masterwork will disturb you on so many levels. Thankfully, this is one of those rare gems that actually lives up to the hype. 4/5

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Masterfully written and directed, and driven by a powerhouse performance by Elisabeth Moss this one should not be missed. 4/5

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A proper millennial banger, with some groundbreaking sfx that, while it looks very CGI today, still holds up remarkably well. Poses the question of what a person could become if you removed accountability for their actions. It seems that if you were Kevin Bacon's character, you would become a creepy sex predator with a god complex. 4/5

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So much better than the remake, this bleak thriller just goes to show the oppressive nature of good manners and the danger of timidity. It works so well because it's so damn frustrating, and that's the whole point the remake missed. "Why are you doing this to us"? - "Because you let me". 4/5

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There's a lot to like about this cross between THE RAID and 28 DAYS LATER as a struggling Muay Thai fighter tries to ascend the zombie-infested hospital to rescue his beloved. The action is pretty good but the editing leaves a lot to be desired, cutting the fights poorly and making you wish the movie had just pushed the action a little harder over the horror. 3/5

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I struggled with this one for the first half, there's a slow start plus a lot of 'in the dark' action, which I found hard to make out or really connect with, but it did pick up in the second half, so it's worth sticking with. 3/5

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Surprisingly enjoyable, largely contained action/thriller. A good example of how to keep the action localised and Fox does a great job here. 3/5

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Interesting movie from Paul Thomas Anderson following Pheonix's dazed PI though post 60s LA. It's a convoluted plot as you'd expect, with plenty of drug induced bizarreness and amusing performances. Lacks something for me but charming none the less and definitely worth a watch for Anderson fans. 3/5

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Robert Wise directs this banger of a submarine thriller, with amazing performances from the two leads Gable and Lancaster. A precursor to Das Boot, with all the tension and claustrophobia you'd expect. This is a great film well worth your time!! 5/5

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A fantastic take on the found footage genre. Besides the concept, there's not much originality here, but it does what it does really, really well. 4/5

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A delightful homage to the old sword and sorcery 'epics'. Bernhardt carries the film with an easy charisma that makes it hard not to get swept up in the cheesy effects and corny dialogue. 3/5

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Elliott Gould crackles and dazzles as Philip Marlow in a case with as many twists as a Chubby Checker concert. No point trying to communicate the plot. Robert Altman directs with utter bravura and Elliott Gould is sensational. Classic 70s LA noir right here. An absolute must!! 4/5

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This is a classic 70's New York movie, with all the grit and hard nosed subway hijinks you need. Star turns from Walter Mathau and Robert Shaw make this an unmissable banger. A subway train is hijacked by armed men and a ransom is demanded for the passengers. Come on!! 5/5

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This is a fun instalment to the Ghostbuster franchise. Great to see some of the old faces show up too. This film is an entertaining and heartfelt love letter to the original film. All of the heart but lacking some of the spark. 3/5

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Woody Allen can be a bit like Marmite. You love him or hate him. Difficult to separate the art from the man but he does make a good movie. This one his not a great but it is interesting to see Allen play with cinematic form. Has something of Fellini's 8 1/2 about it. One for the completists. 3/5

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A star making turn from Peter Boyle makes this worth a watch alone. Susan Sarandon's first role too. This film is divisive, intense, shocking and hilarious. Classic 70s cinema that deserves to be seen. 4/5

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This is a wonderful light comedy drama from the ever watchable Stanley Tucci. Supported by an amazing cast it tells the story of two brothers struggling to keep their small Italian restaurant open. Just delightful. 4/5

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One of the greatest scripts ever written from one of the greatest screenwriters, whose words are spoken by one of the greatest actors and directed by one of the greatest directors. Nuff said!! 5/5

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A beautifully shot folk horror with some great visuals. Dan Stevens and Michael Sheen are fantastic as always. 4/5

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A speedy, no-nonsense, grindhouse-style flick. Dolly herself is a pretty damn creepy as well as surprisingly sympathetic antagonist. 3/5

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A great little thriller, part buddy-movie and part Se7en. Don Lee is always a great watch, and he manages to rise above the other great performances here as a gangster, forced to team with a rogue cop in order to catch a psychotic serial killer. 3/5

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A great sequel which, while not on par with the original, still manages to be a tense and comedic romp. Well worth your time, and the two leads have fantastic chemistry. 4/5

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Cliches aplenty and paper-thin characters compete with gorgeous backdrops and luscious scenery. You could do worse than this middle-of-the-road thriller, but you could also do a lot better. 3/5

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Fantastic blend of Saw and The Strangers. Some great kills, an awesome game of spider and fly between a capable protagonist and his sadistic adversary. 4/5

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An enjoyable low-budget creature feature with some genuinely laugh-out-loud moments and some interesting creature effects. The performances are better than the special effects deserve. 3/5

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A fast paced, mean spirited meta slasher, seeped in lore and with a fantastic looking killer. 3/5

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BEHIND THE MASK: THE RISE OF LESLIE VERNON

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BEHIND THE MASK: THE RISE OF LESLIE VERNON

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Brilliantly written mockumentary about a young man who is determined to be the next big slasher and invites a documentary crew to accompany him on his maiden killing spree. This film is wonderful and slasher fans will get a real kick out of the many easter eggs. 4/5

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BEHIND THE MASK: THE RISE OF LESLIE VERNON

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This is how you do a remake, folks. By honouring the source material and not being afraid to make a few changes to keep things fresh. 4/5

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The newest trilogy starts with such a bang, great film, and it's just a shame the two sequels couldn't maintain the quality of this one. 4/5

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Vaughn and Newton give it their all in this excellent slasher comedy. If you enjoyed Happy Death Day, you'll love this. 4/5

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A great sequel that expands and complements the original. It's more sci-fi than horror this time around, but fans of the original will still find plenty to love. 3/5

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A brilliantly clever slasher/Groundhog Day blend, that is just a wonderfully executed exercise in character development. 4/5

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An absolute stold cold masterpiece. Watch it, enjoy it, then watch it again. 5/5

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Not as good as the original, but still a pretty decent watch. If you're running out of killer crocodile films to watch, you could do a lot worse than this one. 3/5

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If you only watch one movie about an ass-kicking Santa this year... make it Violent Night. But if you watch two... the second should definitely be Fatman. 3/5

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Elliot Gould and Robert Blake crackle in this absolute classic from Peter Hyams. A great script and fantastic performances from two acting titans make this an absolute must. Gould and Blake are vice cops ordered to lay off an investigation in to a local mobster... but of course they don't!! Classic stuff!! 5/5

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The second part of Ethan Coen and Tricia Cooke's lesbian B-movie trilogy is a Neo-noir following Margaret Qualley as she tries to locate her missing niece. Bat-shit turn from Chris Evans. A tone that is a dry as hell. Sprinkled with some Coen magic. I enjoyed this one!! 3/5

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A lot of people seemed to find this unsatisfying. I enjoyed it. Plenty of action and entertainment. Glenn Powell holds the screen pretty well... He's ANGRY don't you know!! Fun to watch... 3/5

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What if General Pinochet was actually an ancient vampire bored of life? A question we've all asked ourselves... Well, El Conde treats us to a thoroughly satisfying answer. This film touches on love, marriage, loyalty, scheming families and the nature of good and evil. It's beautiful black and white photography, great performances, the wonderfully dry tone and a truly magical flying sequence make this macabre tale a total delight. 4/5

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Despite the festive joy, this one is surprisingly dark. Some great creature effects and a tight story make this a must-have festive treat. 4/5

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Big and beautiful, kinda like a Norwegian Godzilla. Though at one point our heroes torment the titular beast by strapping its dead baby's skull to a pickup and racing through town, so you can understand it being a bit pissed. 3/5

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Bigger and better than the last one, but it's also at least 40 minutes too long and pretty convoluted. Art the Clown continues to be the franchise's selling point, and Thornton is amazing again here as he flips effortlessly from hilarious to genuinely terrifying. 3/5

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If you thought Halloween Kills was bad, don't worry, because this is worse. It's not as bad as people say; the film tries to do something new and fails, but you've gotta give it some credit for the attempt. 2/5

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Utter shite. Like, it's almost amazing how awful this film is. It's not so bad its good either. Just plain terrible. 1/5

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Another enjoyable treat from genre legend Stuart Gordon. Features the greatest teddy bear scene ever filmed. 3/5

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More personal drama than horror, but this is still worth a watch, just don't go in expecting to be scared. 3/5

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A great sci-fi flick. A mediocre Alien movie. Still, it's better than Covenant. 3/5

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Have you read Sutter Cane? One of Carpenter's lesser-known works, but this baby is fantastic. Striking visuals and great mythology make this a must-see. Also features my all-time favourite bus scene. 4/5

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If you don't like heights, you are gonna have a really bad time with this one. It's snappy, tense, and pretty much gives you exactly what you'd expect from the poster. Two girls. One tower. Big drop. 4/5

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If you fancy a movie where the characters consistently do the stupidest things you can think of, then boy, do I have a treat for you. Common sense goes out the window as Idris Elba takes on hungry lions. 2/5

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What's worse than an inn run by Nazis? An inn run by Nazi Cannibals! It's less extreme than Martyrs or Inside, but is probably the most easily re-watchable of the three. 3/5

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While not on par with the original, this sequel is good enough to stand on its own merits. The original cast is back, and it's great to give these wonderful characters some closure. 3/5

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A baby alligator gets flushed down the toilet, only to survive and thrive on a diet of subway workers and laboratory dogs infused with growth hormones. It's not long before the giant gator goes on a bloody rampage while still managing to kill every asshole in the film. Karma-gator. 3/5

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Melville is probably the best director or crime movies ever. Alan Delon has never been cooler than in this slow burn crime thriller about a hitman fighting for his life after a job goes wrong. Hugely influential although its character study pacing might not be for everyone. I love it!!! 5/5

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The ultimate action blockbuster. The ultimate Christmas movie. Mctiernan's Die Hard is an absolute classic and a must for anyone who enjoys action cinema. What's not to like about this movie. Willis has never been better. Alan Rickman is iconic. But I'm sure you know all this... 5/5

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F1 is a film meant to be watched in a cinama. If that's not possible it's worth a watch at home. Fresh of his triumphant Top Gun: Maverick, Kosinski brings another entertaining spectacle to the screen in a film which seeps with a love of the movies. Nice reversal of the experienced old hand / fresh young buck trope, F1 is fun. And there's nothing wrong with that. 4/5

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Jaques Tourneur's wonderful British set 1957 horror is a joy to watch. Dana Andrews holds the screen as a rationalist doctor investigating the occult. The filmmaking here is top draw from one of horrors most iconic directors. Yes the Demon looks a little cocky now but don't let that stop you. This is British horror in the 50's at its best!! 4/5

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This film is charming, fun and heartfelt. In other hands this might run a touch long but Gosling is endlessly watchable and the supporting cast do a great job of adding depth. A wonderful feel good picture and the type of fare I like to engage with more and more these days. 4/5

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This is a broad, entertaining movie chock full of comic book violence and interpersonal banter. The film has its flaws but that doesn't stop the energy and enthusiasm of the cast and filmmakers shining through. Worth a watch. 3/5

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It's like Crawl but with sharks, and not as good. On the plus side, the sharks look great. 3/5