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In my experience of growing older and becoming an adult, there are no other aspects of my identity that have inspired me to ponder and question the essence of human identity itself. From the moment we are born, our psyches are being molded by external cultural forces fabricated by the hands and minds of humanity. We construct meaning for ourselves, making the rather incomprehensible nature of reality comprehensible. It gives us structure, yet, there are those of us who have felt that we don’t belong within this structure.

Throughout my life I recall the many instances in which society and pop culture was conversing with me, taking my hand to show me the way of manhood. By the time I was in middle school, I began recognizing that these examples and expectations of masculinity forged a societal caste I could not fit in. Especially in the west, our identity is projected through our appearance. At this stage of my life, I began gravitating towards what was deemed as traditionally feminine. Articles of clothing meant for women, nail polish, and eyeliner; all aesthetic qualities I had developed an affinity towards that I was culturally barred access from..

For 10 years I grappled with my sense of identity, hiding it, suppressing it, only to have it resurface again and again. After experiencing many hardships during the pandemic, I decided to finally embrace what I had been hiding for so long. It was as if I had been living in an artificial world my entire life, a carefully curated set of experiences designed to maintain order within a sterile dome placed over us all. My entire life, I thought there was nothing outside of the dome. When I stepped out of it, I discovered a vast wilderness that is equal parts psychological, sociological and philosophical.

Since then, I’ve discovered a subset of the LGBT community through my love of rock climbing. Salt Lake Area Queer Climbers is an organization designed to unite queer people through the sport of rock climbing. SLAQC has provided me with a sense of community and belonging that no other organization has, something many of us are lacking in this post-modern era.

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Prior to the pandemic, I worked out religiously and enjoyed going to the gym almost every day. After the pandemic I found myself processing and recovering from hardships I had faced during what was one of the most difficult times in my life. I was out of shape, desiring to take control of my health again but the conventional gym didn’t have the same appeal that it used to. I asked myself what would reignite my passion for physical fitness. That question would lead me to rock climbing.

The sport of rock climbing saved my life. Aside from introducing me to SLAQC, climbing provided a unique experience that no other sport or gym could offer. In the climbing gym, specifically with bouldering, you’re provided an experience that engages movement of the body, problem solving skills and socializing with others. Everyone is working on the same boulder problems, which leads to interaction and the formation of friendships. I often think of climbing as physical algebra occurring in a social setting dictated by the exchange of knowledge and information.

This unique experience offered me a path to taking control of my health again, leading me back to other forms of physical activity and providing me with a space where I can separate myself from my other responsibilities.

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Since my youngest days I found myself entranced with the art of storytelling. Whether it was larger than life narratives playing out on the silver screen or more meticulously crafted tales that came to life on the pages of a book or more immersive adventures on other worlds that required one to have a controller in their hands, I was hooked.

I had always been an artistic kid but I didn’t understand that I had an affinity for writing until later on in life. During my 2016 senior year of high school, I recall my art teacher asking me if I had any interest in pursuing journalism because of my writing style. I said no, only to begin working on a writing project a year later.

In 2020 and further into the pandemic, the many struggles I was subjected to sparked something within me. I began treating writing like a career, committing to practice every day. Ironically, I now find myself gravitating towards journalism, creative writing and directional positions. A great deal of my work is predicated on the values of innovation and societal change. It’s a dream of mine to be remembered as a someone who created works of art that challenged the notion of what storytelling mediums are capable of doing as well as influencing tangible positive change in the world.

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As an extension of my passion for storytelling, I now find myself pursuing other types of creative endeavors such as content creation on YouTube. With my YouTube channel, my goal is to create video essays and other styles of videos that focus on social issues and how they’re presented in mass media.

By focusing on the presence of social issues in pop culture, I hope to give potential audiences an alternate perspective, that is at least in my mind, influenced by nuance. Alternative perspectives that embrace nuance are in desperate need due the antagonistic nature of public discourse and mass communication surrounding social issues. Much like my artistic endeavors, I’m hoping that my YouTube content inspires people to look at themselves, others, and society differently.

I’m in the editing stage while working on my first YouTube video and I’m already noticing certain quirks and flaws pertaining to my public speaking that can be addressed. Making content like this allows one to understand themselves better from a communications standpoint.

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Much of my values of innovation, social change and alternative perspectives shape my political affiliation or the lack thereof. A great deal of the discourse we have relating to politics is shaped by outrage, malformed presentations of truth and convenient narratives that all serve as cogs in a mechanized, looming reaper that only exists to insight societal regression.

We all, myself included, find ourselves navigating the all encompassing, inescapable nature of tribalism in the digital landscape, often falling prey to it even with the best of intentions. I find that perceiving social issues through viewpoints that are “appropriate” or “correct” for a Democratic or Republican lens is now antithetical to critical thinking and nuance.

Though I consider myself more liberal, I find that some aspects of modern liberalism have left me feeling alienated. While I understand a great deal of the conservative perspective, I don’t align with conservatism, especially with how it's developed in recent years. I think both parties have strayed from their fundamentals, leading to radicalism and the very fabric of our country being torn apart until only tatters remain.

I view independence as a rejection of the binary thinking, misinformation and antagonism that divides us all. Being independent isn’t a declaration of superiority, it represents a desire for a better tomorrow.