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I took this photo back last Fall when a freak wind storm blew this campus tree down. I thought it ironic that such a strong and stable structure like a massive clay vase and tree trunk could be so easily pushed down by an invisible thing like the wind. Now when I look at this photo I think about interviewing my Mother, my own sentinel of strength and stability. She has had phases in her life of intense sorrow, and it recalled to me that even the strongest individuals can face overwhelming grief, and have moments of "weakness". But I think my Mother grieving is anything but weakness--it is just another inch grown and another leaf sprouted from her tree of life.

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This is one of my family's cats, Remus. He is both the antagonist and the angel of the household--a pain to deal with sometimes, but also a source of great happiness. In a way, pets, family, friends, and other aspects of life we hold sacred, are our little oases that ground us. They are home. When I am interviewing my participants, I want to recall my own oases to keep me both present and open to the possible pain of the interview. I want to be the Dispassionate Witness, but to do so I must realize my own reactions to others' grief, and call upon these oases so that I may keep myself grounded and strong in the face of it.