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A Guide to Flexible Service

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Support for families with children aged 0 - 7.

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Home-Start South Wiltshire is a voluntary organisation committed to promoting the welfare of families with at least one child under five years of age.

Volunteers offer befriending support, practical and emotional advice in the homes of families who are having difficulties managing parenting for a variety of different reasons.

We're there for parents when they need us the most, because childhood can't wait.

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Home-Start South Wiltshire | Because childhood can't wait

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Home-Start South Wiltshire is a voluntary organisation committed to promoting the welfare of families with at least one child under five years of age. Volunteers offer befriending support, practical and emotional advice in the homes of families who are having difficulties managing parenting for a variety of different reasons.

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Support and education for young families, available in Tidworth and Bulford Childrens Centres.

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Our Wiltshire Children's Centre services have a dedicated website providing information for parents and carers of 0-5's in Wiltshire on the range of support available in your area. You can also download local time-tables, activity packs and the latest newsletters from our services.

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Our Wiltshire Children's Centre services have a dedicated website providing information for parents and carers of 0-5's in Wiltshire on the range of support available in your area. You can also download local time-tables, activity packs and the latest newsletters from our services.

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2023DIN01-047

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Confidential Emotional Support

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Problems

Many children and young people contact us who are going through a really difficult time but feel unable to talk to their parents about how they are feeling and what is happening for them. They may be, for example, being bullied, struggling with an eating disorder, self harming, and/or generally feeling depressed.

The reasons they give for not talking to their parents include:

They won't understand

They will think its my fault

They will be angry

They're too busy

They will be upset

I don't want to worry them

If you are a child or young person who is going through a bad time at the moment it is sad that you are going through it on your own. Try for a moment and put yourself in your parents shoes - try to imagine yourself in the future as a parent - if you had a child who was unhappy would you not want them to tell you so you can give them some support, help, extra care, hugs, affection etc?

Don't automatically think that your parents are going to blame you or be angry with you. They may be angry at the situation but that is different to being angry with you. They may be shocked at what you tell them but once they have got over the shock they will probably want to help and give you some support.

If your parents know you are very unhappy or there is something troubling you or you have got yourself into some kind of trouble - yes they may be upset and worried initially but I think they would be more upset and worried if they knew that you are keeping your unhappiness from them.

If you want to talk to your parents about something worrying you or how you are feeling try and choose a quiet time - not when they are in the middle of making the tea or getting ready for work - but a time when you know they are going to be around to talk to - or even suggest going for a walk together and talk to them then. If you find it difficult explaining what is happening or how you feel try writing a letter to leave for them so they can take in what you are saying and then sit down together and talk.

Parents were young themselves and may be more understanding than you think about situations - it may well have been that your parents may have found themselves in similar situations when they were your age or may have had friends with similar problems. Sometimes dealing with stuff on your own can make you feel more alone and isolated which will just end up making you more depressed. Just to talk about worries and problems can be like a weight lifted from you. Your parents may not be able to solve your problems for you but they may have advice or suggest different ways of coping which you may not have thought of and it is another means of support. Some children and young people who feel down and very depressed try and act like everything is ok and put on a happy face - this in itself can be an enormous strain - constantly putting on an act. If you share your problems with others at least you don't have to pretend to be happy and/or coping.

Everyone finds it difficult to cope sometimes and most people feel down and depressed about things too at some time or other but if you allow yourself to get more and more depressed it will be harder for you to pull yourself out of it.

Remember that your parents are responsible for your protection and safety. If you feel you are being given a hard time, your parents are too strict, always on your back etc. try and show your parents you can be responsible and trustworthy and are willing to compromise and that you realise you cannot always have things your own way

If you feel they are being unfair about something then sit down and try and talk about it in a mature way - shouting, yelling, tantrums, slamming doors etc. isn't the way to get what you want. If you feel something is unfair then maybe come up with a few suggestions of how things could change and negotiate with your parents. They may have some rules which they won't compromise on but if they see you are acting in a responsible way they are more likely to trust you.

e.g. if you have to be in by 9.30pm then stick to that time and don't keep coming in later as that will only annoy your parents. If you stick to that time regularly then maybe after a period of time you can sit down with your parents and say that you have been sticking to the agreed time and wondered whether there was any possibility of negotiating a slightly later time with them. If you are reasonable you should find your parents will be reasonable too.

Remember also parents worry about your safety and if you are later than you said it may not be a big deal to you if you come back half an hour late but your parents may be beside themselves with worry so always ring or text if you are going to be late.

Many children and young people spend a lot of time emailing and surfing the web - that is fine but remember about your own safety. Never give your personal details out and never arrange to meet anyone without talking to your parents about it first. You may think you are meeting another young person who could in fact be an older person who is a paedophile and would harm you. Keep yourself safe at all times.

If you are going through a difficult time now please think about sharing it with your parents - they may be able to help you to get some support which may make you think differently about things. If you really can't talk to your parents then there are also young peoples counselling services and helplines where someone can talk to you and that may help too or talk to a teacher/college lecturer, youth leader, school/college counsellor etc. (see section on Children's & Young People's Helplines).

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Great listen for new dads on basic training from birth to 3 years, You can download and listen on Audible.

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Attention!

An indispensable training manual for new recruits to fatherhood. Written by ex-Commando and dad of three Neil Sinclair, this manual will teach you, in no-nonsense terms, how to:

Survive the first 24 hours.

Prepare and plan to prevent poor parental performance.

Maintain morale in the ranks.

Feed, clothe, transport and entertain your troops.

Transport the troops successfully on manoeuvres.

Increase your 'flash to bang' time and 'square away' tasks along the way.

And much, much more. Let training commence.

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Check out this great listen on Audible.com. Attention! An indispensable training manual for new recruits to fatherhood. Written by ex-Commando and dad of three Neil Sinclair, this manual will teach you, in no-nonsense terms, how to: Survive the first 24 hours. Prepare and plan to prevent poor par...

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You can get up to £500 every 3 months (up to £2,000 a year) for each of your children to help with the costs of childcare. This goes up to £1,000 every 3 months if a child is disabled (up to £4,000 a year).

If you get Tax-Free Childcare, you'll set up an online childcare account for your child. For every £8 you pay into this account, the government will pay in £2 to use to pay your provider.

You can get Tax-Free Childcare at the same time as 15 or 30 hours free childcare if you're eligible for both.

What you can use Tax-Free Childcare for

You can use it to pay for approved childcare, for example:

childminders, nurseries and nannies

after school clubs and play schemes

Your childcare provider must be signed up to the scheme before you can pay them and benefit from Tax-Free Childcare.

Check with your provider to see if they're signed up.

If your child is disabled

You can use the extra Tax-Free Childcare money you get to help pay for extra hours of childcare. You can also use it to help pay your childcare provider so they can get specialist equipment for your child such as mobility aids. Talk to them about what equipment your child can get.

If your childcare provider is in an EEA country

You may be able to use Tax-Free Childcare to pay a provider based in a European Economic Area (EEA) country. Contact HM Revenue and Customs (HMRC) to check.

Eligibility

Your eligibility depends on:

whether you're working (employed, self-employed, or a director)

your income (and your partner's income, if you have one)

your child's age and circumstances

your immigration status

If you're working

You can usually get Tax-Free Childcare if you (and your partner, if you have one) are:

in work

on sick leave or annual leave

on shared parental, maternity, paternity or adoption leave and you're going back to work within 31 days of the date you first applied

If you're not currently working

You may still be eligible if your partner is working and you get any of the following:

Incapacity Benefit

Severe Disablement Allowance

Carer's Allowance or (in Scotland only) Carer Support Payment

contribution-based Employment and Support Allowance

You can apply if you're starting or re-starting work within the next 31 days.

Your income

Over the next 3 months you and your partner (if you have one) must each expect to earn at least:

£2,379 if you're aged 21 or over

£1,788 if you're aged 18 to 20

£1,331 if you're under 18 or an apprentice

This is the National Minimum Wage or Living Wage for 16 hours a week on average.

You can use an average of how much you expect to earn over the current tax year if:

you work throughout the year but do not get paid regularly

you're self-employed and do not expect to earn enough in the next 3 months

Example

You're eligible if you're 21 or over and do not have a regular income but earn £9,518 a year. This is the same as earning £2,379 every 3 months on average.

If you're self-employed and started your business less than 12 months ago, you can earn less and still be eligible for Tax-Free Childcare.

If you have more than one job, you can use your total earnings to work out if you meet the threshold. This includes:

earnings from any employment

earnings from any self-employment

If you're both employed and self-employed, you can use just your self-employment income if this would make you eligible. For example, if you expect your average self-employed earnings over the tax year to be more than you'll get over the next 3 months as an employee.

Certain types of income will not count towards the minimum amount you must earn to be eligible.

These include:

dividends

interest

income from investing in property

pension payments

If you or your partner have an expected ' adjusted net income ' over £100,000 in the current tax year, you will not be eligible.

Your child

Your child must be 11 or under and usually live with you. They stop being eligible on 1 September after their 11th birthday.

Adopted children are eligible, but foster children are not.

If your child is disabled and usually lives with you, you may get up to £4,000 a year until 1 September after their 16th birthday. They're eligible for this if they:

get Disability Living Allowance, Personal Independence Payment, Armed Forces Independence Payment, Child Disability Payment (Scotland only) or Adult Disability Payment (Scotland only)

are certified as blind or severely sight-impaired

Your immigration status

To be eligible for Tax-Free Childcare, you must have a National Insurance number and at least one of the following:

British or Irish citizenship

settled or pre-settled status, or you have applied and you're waiting for a decision

permission to access public funds - your UK residence card will tell you if you cannot do this

If you have a partner, they must have a National Insurance number too.

If you're living in an EU country, Switzerland, Norway, Iceland or Liechtenstein, you (or your partner if you have one) might still be eligible for Tax-Free Childcare if:

your work is in the UK

the work started before 1 January 2021

you've worked in the UK at least once every 12 months since you started working here

This is known as being a 'frontier worker'. You must show your Frontier Worker permit to the Childcare Service when you apply for Tax-Free Childcare.

If you get tax credits, Universal Credit, a childcare bursary or grant, or childcare vouchers

You cannot get Tax-Free Childcare at the same time as claiming Working Tax Credit, Child Tax Credit, Universal Credit or childcare vouchers.

Which scheme you're better off with depends on your situation. Use the childcare calculator to work out which type of support is best for you.

Tax credits

If you successfully apply for Tax-Free Childcare, your Working Tax Credit or Child Tax Credit will stop straight away. You cannot apply for them again.

Childcare vouchers

You must tell your employer within 90 days of applying for Tax-Free Childcare to stop your childcare vouchers or directly contracted childcare.

They'll then stop the vouchers or directly contracted childcare.

You may have to give HMRC evidence of leaving the childcare voucher scheme. For example, a copy of the letter telling your employer you're leaving the childcare voucher scheme.

If you have a partner who gets vouchers or directly contracted childcare, they'll need to tell their employer to stop this within 90 days too.

Universal Credit

Wait until you get a decision on your Tax-Free Childcare application before cancelling your Universal Credit claim.

Bursaries

If you or your partner get a childcare bursary or grant or expect to do so within the next 3 months, you cannot get Tax-Free Childcare.

Apply
Apply online for Tax-Free Childcare
If you apply for Tax-Free Childcare and someone else already gets free childcare for that child, their 15 or 30 hours will stop at the end of the next term. You will be eligible for 15 or 30 hours free childcare instead.

If you have a partner

You must include your partner in your application if you are:

married or in a civil partnership and live together

not married or in a civil partnership, but living together as though you are

Their employment and income will not affect your eligibility if they:

are or will be absent from your household for more than 6 months

are a prisoner

You and your partner cannot both have accounts for the same child.

If you are separated

You and your ex-partner need to decide who should apply if you are jointly responsible for your child.

If you cannot decide, both of you must apply separately and HMRC will decide who gets a childcare account.

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What Tax-Free Childcare is, eligibility and how to apply

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Postnatal depression is a type of depression that many parents experience after having a baby.
It's a common problem, affecting more than 1 in every 10 women within a year of giving birth. It can also affect fathers and partners.

It's important to get help as soon as possible if you think you might be depressed, as your symptoms could last for months or get worse and have a significant impact on you, your baby and your family.

With the right support most people make a full recovery.

Depression during pregnancy

Depression in pregnancy (antenatal depression) is also common, affecting more than 1 in 10 women.

Other mental health symptoms that can occur during or after your pregnancy include anxiety, panic attacks and psychosis.
Read more about mental health in pregnancy

Symptoms of postnatal depression

Many women feel a bit down, tearful or anxious in the first week after giving birth.

This is often called the " baby blues" and is so common that it's considered normal.

The "baby blues" do not last for more than 2 weeks after giving birth.

If your symptoms last longer or start later, you could have postnatal depression.

Postnatal depression can start any time in the first year after giving birth.

Signs that you or someone you know might be depressed include:

a persistent feeling of sadness and low mood

lack of enjoyment and loss of interest in the wider world

lack of energy and feeling tired all the time

trouble sleeping at night and feeling sleepy during the day

finding it difficult to look after yourself and your baby

withdrawing from contact with other people

problems concentrating and making decisions

frightening thoughts - for example, about hurting your baby

Many women do not realise they have postnatal depression because it can develop gradually.

Speak to a GP, midwife or health visitor as soon as possible if:

you think you may be depressed

Many midwives and health visitors have been trained to recognise postnatal depression and have techniques that can help.

Remember that:

a range of help and support is available, including talking therapy

depression is an illness like any other

it's not your fault you're depressed - it can happen to anyone

being depressed does not mean you're a bad parent

it does not mean you're going mad

your baby will not be taken away from you - babies are only taken into care in very exceptional circumstances

Treatments for postnatal depression

Postnatal depression can be lonely, distressing and frightening, but support and effective treatments are available.

These include:

self-help - things you can try yourself include talking to your family and friends about your feelings and what they can do to help, making time for yourself to do things you enjoy, resting whenever you get the chance, getting as much sleep as you can at night, exercising regularly, and eating a healthy diet

talking therapy - a GP may be able to recommend a self-help course or may refer you for a course of therapy, such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT)

antidepressants - these may be recommended if your depression is more severe or other treatments have not helped; your doctor can prescribe a medicine that's safe to take while breastfeeding

Local and national organisations, such as the Association for Post Natal Illness (APNI) and Pre and Postnatal Depression Advice and Support (PANDAS), can also be useful sources of help and advice.

Causes of postnatal depression

The cause of postnatal depression is not completely clear.

There are a number of things that may make you more likely to have postnatal depression. These include:

a history of mental health problems, particularly depression, earlier in life

a history of mental health problems during pregnancy

having no close family or friends to support you

a difficult relationship with your partner

recent stressful life events, such as a bereavement

physical or psychological trauma, such as domestic violence

Even if you do not have any of these, having a baby is a life-changing event that can sometimes trigger depression.

It often takes time to adapt to becoming a new parent. Looking after a baby can be stressful and exhausting.

Preventing postnatal depression

There are things you can do during pregnancy to help you keep well, such as maintaining a healthy lifestyle and having someone you can talk to and turn to for support.

Going to antenatal classes and making friends with other pregnant women or new parents can also be helpful.

If you are pregnant or thinking about getting pregnant, talk to a GP or your mental health team if:

you have a history of depression or mental health problems

someone in your family has had mental health problems after childbirth (for example, your mother or sister)

This is so they can offer you appropriate treatment.

You can also talk to a midwife, who can support you or refer you to specialist mental health services if needed. If you have had a mental health problem while pregnant, your doctor should arrange for you to be seen regularly in the first few weeks after birth.

The mental health team, maternity team and GP will work closely with you during your pregnancy and after you have given birth.

Myths about postnatal depression

Postnatal depression is often misunderstood and there are many myths surrounding it.

These include:

postnatal depression is less severe than other types of depression - in fact, it's as serious as other types of depression

postnatal depression is entirely caused by hormonal changes - it's actually caused by many different factors

postnatal depression will soon pass - unlike the "baby blues", postnatal depression can persist for months if left untreated and in a minority of cases it can become a long-term problem

postnatal depression only affects women - research has actually found that up to 1 in 10 new fathers become depressed after having a baby

These factors are equally true of antenatal depression.

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Postnatal depression is a type of depression that many parents experience after having a baby. It's a common problem. Depression in pregnancy (antenatal depression) is also common.

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Local childminders, Nurseries, Nannies and schools

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*I am offering a free 1 hour session at mine or your house so you can attend for a smear test* (Just a quick note as to why it says I haven't uploaded my DBS. This is because when...

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Originally a primary school teacher, I have been childminding now for 22 years and have received an Outstanding grade in my last three Ofsted inspections. I love my job and enjoy the...

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*Sorry. I don't have space for new children, currently. Please do ask any questions or ask to be put on my waiting list if you'd like to be informed of a space. I'm currently on maternity...

I am a childminder offering a warm, welcoming home from home environment. I started childminding in September 2020. I am an Ofsted registered, Enhanced CRB checked, a qualified Paediatric...

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My name is Leila Clark, I've been a childminder since 2010 when my youngest was small. We usually spend our mornings with another childminder allowing the children to make friends in...

Evening Babysitting still available. I am afraid all of my childminding spaces have now been filled for September 2022. Thank you to everyone who has shown interest. Kindest Regards,...

We are a Daughter & Mother team. We offer full day care (7am to 6pm) , before and after school and offer school drop off and pick up service from the Ludgershall schools care and holiday...

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Childminders near SP11 - Childcare.co.uk

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Usually responds within 2 hours *I am offering a free 1 hour session at mine or your house so you can attend for a smear test* (Just a quick note as to why it says I haven't uploaded my DBS. This is because when...

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Advise on co-parenting and separation

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A Guide To The Employment And Deployment Of Serving Parents And Cares

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A Guide To The Employment And Deployment Of Serving Parents And Cares

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20171113-A Guide to the Employment and Deployment of Serving Parents and Carers[2393]

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Maternity And Breastfeeding In The British Army Jun21

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Maternity And Breastfeeding In The British Army Jun21

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Wiltshire Portage is a home visiting educational service for children