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Love how you put this poem together. yes our journey is perfect on this earth. I would only add to that through Christ it is made perfect.

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Max,
You did an excellent job fitting together these lines. There are no lines that don't work together. I also really like the name and theme its pretty cool to think of a poem from a birds perspective.

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“Trees of ashes wave good-bye to good-bye, breathe the air but leave plenty after me” This is a juxtaposition used perfectly to describe the terrible consequences of industrialization of man which the writer laments.

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This was a really cool poem. I liked how the point of view was not directly stated but it is interpreted as coming from a bird's. It's really creative and the imagery in the poem is top notch. A really good job done.

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Hi Max,
I really enjoyed reading your spliced poem, the format was very interesting as well as seeing how you could turn these poems into being from the blackbird's perspective. Your poem is different from the other ones I've read because of this change in perspective. I especially liked how you separated each line and staggered them, but they still flowed together really lovely.

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Great poem Max! I love how you formatted it on the padlet to start off with. I think your title matches the meaning of how you put these poems together. I truly love the connection between all of these. Great job!

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I really like the spacing in this poem, I think it emphasizes a journey and the slight repetition and rhyming also keep my attention. I used the line "my own diversity" in my poem too, Walt Whitman's lines are very powerful. Your ending evokes pathos, and makes me feel like the journey has ended. You did a good job tying your poem to the world around us too, it holds similar themes as the originals poems did.

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I enjoy trying to compare my thoughts to yours while reading this. Breaking down each part of the poems you used makes sense to your title of the spliced version.

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I really like this poem. You went a different way and not only separated every line but also brought a unique viewpoint from a bird. I love the ending and it gave me a very peaceful vibe. It was very entertaining to read and I overall enjoyed this piece.

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I like how you structured your poem and definitely could see the bird's viewpoint of flying high and leaving the world behind in the lines you chose. I could see the bird taking off with the first line that ended "I rise" and then feel the bird's feeling that flying is awesome with the ending "perfect on this earth." I really like the effect.

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Hi Max,
As I read your poem, I made the connection that you personified the bird and relate the creature to your own self. Lines such as "trees of ashes wave good-bye to good-bye" and "yet the journey we make together is perfect on this earth" relates to both you and the bird perfectly. This is because as organisms, we experience a lot of the same environments and even experiences but all go through this journey called life.

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I liked how you put this poem together. How you put together "fresh courage glimmers from planets" with "and the map appears to disappear". It shows me that from other planets we are a mere speck in this universe. We may be small but we make due with what we have and enjoy life here.

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This poem seems to be told from the point of view of a bird, which draws my attention. This is because most poems that I read are told from a human point of view. This new point of view gives me a different insight into life. Your poem beautifies life in a way.

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Max, this is really cool. I really like the way the next to the last line works and how "flying in a green light" really puts us in a different space right from the beginning.

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Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear I rise

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Of one of many circles

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Leaving behind nights of terror and fear

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Trees of ashes wave good-bye to good-bye

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I resist any thing better than my own diversity

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And am not stuck up, and am in my place

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Breathe the air but leave plenty after me

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Yet the journey we make together is perfect on this earth