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Baruch Atah Adonai, eloheinu Melekh ha-olam, asher kid’shanu b’mitzvotav v’tsivanu lirdof tzedek

Brucha Yah Shechinah, eloheinu Malkat ha-olam, asher kid’shatnu b’mitzvotayha vitzivatnu lirdof tzedek

Blessed is the Source, who shows us paths to holiness, and commands us to pursue justice.

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Once, a man said: "A woman belongs on the bimah like an orange belongs on the seder plate." And so began a tradition  of representing women on the seder plate by including an orange.

Except that's not actually what happened.

In the early 1980s, Susannah Heschel, a pioneering Jewish feminist scholar, spoke at Oberlin College's Hillel. Some students introduced their guest speaker to an early feminist haggadah they had created together. This haggadah suggested placing a crust of bread on the seder plate, as a sign of solidarity with Jewish lesbians. The crust of bread was meant to symbolize the historical exclusion of lesbians from Judaism, as bread is excluded from the seder plate.

Heschel, however, had reservations about this tradition. She felt uncomfortable with putting bread on the seder plate, thereby breaking the laws against eating leavened grains during Passover. She felt that to do so would be to suggest that lesbians and gay men are comparable to a violation of Halakhic law. Instead, Heschel chose an orange to represent the inclusion of gay and lesbian Jews. She offered the orange as a symbol of the fruitfulness of Judaism as a whole when lesbians and gay men are actively included and contributing to Jewish life.

Heschel emphasized the seeds of the orange as another crucial aspect of the tradition. According to her, the seeds represent homophobia; each orange segment had a few seeds that must be spat out as a symbolic repudiation of homophobia.

But over time, this story changed. Somehow, through oral transmission, Heschel's intent was erased. The story came to center an apocryphal man, and the orange became about the vital but less transgressive cause of female rabbis.

Heschel writes: "Somehow, though, the typical patriarchal maneuver occurred: My idea of an orange and my intention of affirming lesbians and gay men were transformed. Now the story circulates that a man said to me that a woman belongs on the bimah as an orange on the seder plate. A woman’s words are attributed to a man, and the affirmation of lesbians and gay men is erased. Isn’t that precisely what’s happened over the centuries to women’s ideas?"

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Reciting the Kiddush

(Ashkenazi pronunciation, masc.)
Baruch atah Adonai, eloheinu Melech ha’olam boreh p’ri ha-gafen.

(Ashkenazi pronunciation, fem.)
Brucha Yah Shechinah, eloheinu Malkat ha’olam, borayt p’ri hagafen.

Blessed is the Source that fills all creation and brings forth the
fruit of the vine.

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Washing the hands

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Blessing for the green vegetable

Take some greens and dip them in salt water, then say:

(Ashkenazi pronunciation, fem.)
Brucha Yah Shechina, Eloheinu Malkat ha’olam, borayt p’ri
ha’adamah.

(Ashkenazi pronunciation, masc.)
Baruch atah Adonai, Eloheinu Melekh ha’olam borei p’ri ha’adamah.

Blessed is the One, who sustains all life, and brings forth fruits
from the earth.

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Breaking of the middle matzah

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Telling the story

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For each plague, dip your finger into the wine and put a drop onto the plate.

Dam.............Blood
Tzfardeyah.............Frogs
Kinim.............Lice
Arov.............Wild Beasts
Dever.............Blight
Shichin.............Boils
Barad.............Hail
Arbeh.............Locusts
Choshech.............Endless Night
Makat B’chorot.............Slaying of the First-Born

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All sing! A prayer of gratitude (that also slaps).

Ilu hotzi hotzianu hotzianu mi’mitzrayim
Hotzianu mi’mitzrayim dayenu
(If you had only brought us out of Mitzrayim – Dayenu!)
Dai-dai-yenu, Dai-dai-yenu, Dai-dai-yenu
Dai-yenu, Dai-yenu!

Ilu natan natan lanu natan lanu et ha'shabbat
Natan lanu et ha'shabbat dayenu
(If you had only given us Shabbat – Dayenu!)
Dai-dai-yenu, Dai-dai-yenu, Dai-dai-yenu
Dai-yenu, Dai-yenu!

Ilu natan natan lanu natan lanu et ha'torah
Natan lanu et ha'torah dayenu
(If you had only given us the Torah – Dayenu!)
Dai-dai-yenu, Dai-dai-yenu, Dai-dai-yenu
Dai-yenu, Dai-yenu!

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Sung by the youngest child in Hebrew.

Mah nishtanah ha-lai-lah ha-zeh mi-kol ha-layloht, mi-kol ha-layloht?
Why is this night different from all other nights?

Sheh-b'khol ha-layloht anu okhlin chameytz u-matzah, chameytz u-matzah.
Ha-lahylah ha-zeh, ha-lahylah ha-zeh, kooloh matzah?
Why is it that on all other nights during the year we eat
either bread or matzoh, but on this night we eat only
matzoh?

Sheh-b'khol ha-layloht anu okhlin sh'ar y'rakot, sh'ar y'rakot.
Ha-lahylah ha-zeh, ha-lahylah ha-zeh, maror?
Why is it that on all other nights we eat all kinds of herbs,
but on this night we eat only bitter herbs?

Sheh-b'khol ha-layloht ayn anu mat'bilin afilu pa'am echat, afilu pa'am echat.
Ha-lahylah ha-zeh, ha-lahylah ha-zeh, sh'tay p'amim?
Why is it that on all other nights we do not dip our herbs
even once, but on this night we dip them twice?

Sheh-b'khol ha-layloht anu okhlin bayn yosh'bin u'vayn m'soobin, bayn yosh'bin u'vayn m'soobin.
Halahylah hazeh, halahylah ha-zeh, koolanu m'soobin?
Why is it that on all other nights we eat either sitting or reclining,
but on this night we eat in a reclining position?

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Reform Rabbi Dara Lithwick offers this model for the Passover seder’s four children based on LGBTQ Inclusion:

THE WISE CHILD

The wise child is thirsty for guidance. They might ask: “What has God commanded of us?” “How can I be a better ally and friend?” “How can I celebrate you and help ensure that our laws and policies and spaces are LGBTQ inclusive?”

We can encourage them to lead in synagogues and communities to ensure that forms, policies, language, and ritual are inclusive of sexuality and gender diversity.

THE CONTRARY CHILD

The contrary child does not see any need to ensure that LGBTQ people belong in our communities. They might ask: “Why should I do this for you?”

Those of us who value inclusion may initially feel inclined to exclude the contrary child. Including them as one of the Four Children, though, suggests that they are not fundamentally bad – simply ignorant.

We can remind them of a fundamental teaching in Torah:

“You shall not wrong nor oppress a stranger, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt (Exodus 22:20).”

THE SIMPLE CHILD

The simple child wants to know where to begin. This individual might ask: “What is this about?” To them, we can quote the following:

“V’ahavta l’rei-acha kamocha.”
“Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Leviticus 19:18)

These words of Torah are a reminder that all of us deserve to be loved – after all, there is no caveat in this law that says your neighbor is deserving of love only if they are a certain type of person.

THE CHILD WHO DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO ASK

There are those who don’t even know how to ask.

We can tell them that we are all created b’tzelem Elohim (in God’s image), that we are all deserving of respect and kindness and this diversity is part of God’s gift to us as humans.

THE FIFTH CHILD

Finally, we can imagine a fifth child – one who isn’t even at the seder table because they don’t think that they belong.

This fifth child may feel lost; they may not be able to see how to reconcile their LGBTQ identity with their Jewish upbringing. We must make every effort to reach the fifth child, to live the words in the Haggadah, “Let all who are hungry come and eat.” We must keep our hearts and our homes open so they can feel welcome and included at our Seder tables.

In the words of Rabbi Rick Jacobs, president of the Union for Reform Judaism:

"Audacious hospitality isn’t just a temporary act of kindness so people don’t feel excluded. It’s an ongoing invitation to be part of community – and a way to transform ourselves spiritually in the process.”

And let us say: Amen.

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Washing the hands before the meal

(Ashkenazi pronunciation, masc.)
Baruch atah Adonai, eloheinu Melech ha-olam, asher kid’shanu
b’mitzvotav v’tsivanu al n’tilat yadayim.

(Ashkenazi pronunciation,fem.)
Brucha Yah Shechinah, eloheinu Malkat ha-olam, asher kid’shatnu
b’mitzvotayha v’tzivatnu al n’tilat yadayim.

(Iraqi pronunciation,masc.)
Barouch ata Adonai eloheinu Melech ha-olam asher kid-sha-nu bemis-wo-thaw we-see-wanu al ni-tee-lath ya-da-yeem.

Adored to us are you Hashem, for reminding us again and
again, of the holiness that is our fluid essence, and of our
ability to be reminded of that essence and that holiness merely by touching our hands to each other and to water.

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Prayer for the beginning of the meal and blessing for the matzah

(Ashkenazi pronunciation, masc.)
Baruch atah Adonai, eloheinu Melech ha-olam ha-motzi lechem min ha-aretz.

(Ashkenazi pronunciation,fem.)
Brucha Yah Shechinah, eloheinu Malkat ha-olam ha-motzi lechem min ha-aretz.

(Iraqi pronunciation,masc.)
Barouch ata Adonai, eloheinu Melech ha-olam ha-mosee le-hem min haares.

Blessed are You, Compassionte One, who has given us the blessing of eating this matzah.

(Ashkenazi pronunciation, masc.)
Baruch atah Adonai, eloheinu Melech ha-olam asher kid-shanu bmitzvotav vitzivanu al akhilat matzah.

(Ashkenazi pronunciation,fem.)
Brucha Yah Shechinah, eloheinu Malkat ha-olam asher kid-shatnu
b’mitzvotayha vitzivatnu al akhilat matzah.

(Iraqi pronunciation,masc.)
Barouch ata Adonai eloheinu melech ha-olam asher kid-sha-nu bemis-wo-thaw we-see-wanu al achee-lath massa.
Blessed are You, Sustainer of all Life, who brings forth bread from the earth.

Feed some matzah to the person to your right. All eat while reclining.

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Blessing for the bitter herbs

We dip the bitter herbs in the charoset and say:

(Ashkenazi pronunciation, masc.)
Baruch atah Adanai eloheinu melech ha-olam, asher kid-shanub’mitzvotav v’tsivanu al achilat maror.

(Ashkenazi pronunciation,fem.)
Brucha Yah Shechinah, eloheinu Malkat ha-olam, asher kid’shatnu b’mitzvotayha vitzivatnu al achilat maror.

(Iraqi pronunciation,masc.)
Barouch ata adonai eloheinu melech ha-olam asher kid-sha-nu bemis-wo-thaw we-see-wanu al achee-lath maror.

Blessed are You, Shaddai, who has shown us paths to holiness, and invites us to eat the bitter herb.

The maror is a call to action; the bitterness reminds us remind us that struggle is better than complicit acceptance of injustice. We taste the bitter herbs and recognize the bitter consequences of exploitation.

We eat the bitter herb without reclining.

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Sandwich of maror, charoset, and matzah

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The meal

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The afikomen

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Saying grace

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Praise (Songs!)

OSEH SHALOM
Oseh shalom bimromav
hu ya’aseh shalom aleinu
v’al kol ha’olam,
v’imru, v’imru, Amein.
ya’aseh shalom
ya’aseh shalom
shalom aleinu v’al kol ha’olam (2x)
May the One who makes peace in the supernal,
grant peace to us, and to all the world. Amen

LO YISA GOY
Lo yisa goy el goy kherev
Lo yilmedu od milkhama.

Nation shall not lift up sword against nation.
Neither shall they learn war any more.
And each ‘neath their vine and fig tree,
Shall live in peace and unafraid.

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Conclusion

The traditional aspiration upon parting is "Next year in Jerusalem!"

Here, instead, we say, "Next year in a just world."

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Tzedek tzedek tirdoff!
Justice, Justice We Shall Pursue!