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Sorry, not one of the writers, but I have something for you regardless

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Sorry, not one of the writers, but I have something for you regardless

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Tripe and Drivel, please appear!

I bring the first post of this year.

We miss the whimsy of your word.

To leave off here would be absurd.

School is busy, this I know.

Homework is a worthy foe;

An entity I'd gladly fight

To lift you from your website plight.

My weapon is a simple poem

Reminding of this dusty tome.

Let my lines work to inspire;

To fuel your lost creative fire.

If this fails, I'll understand.

Your return, I won't demand.

My gifts to you are these here rhymes

As memories of simpler times.

I ask for one thing in return:

'Never lose the wonder earned

Upon these pages bound in chrome,

Ever-providing mental roams.'

As for you, my friend, the bird

I'm sure you've read my every word.

This message, also, you'll receive,

'Imagination never leaves.'

Even now as we grow old

Cogitations don't get cold

So whatever path you choose,

The days of yore, you'll never lose.

Gods, I miss this site. Just a friendly reminder that, Hey! Even if you choose to leave this site still dusty, I wish you all the best in your writing journeys. If you decide to come back, your readers will be waiting. I just miss this place... Happy New Year!

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Happy 1st bday, waste Fire. 🫶🏽

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I’m so, so tired. I just wish I had my people back to turn to, ya know? This depression  is crushing me, and it’s like I can’t breathe. I just need to cut away from everyone. I miss this page. Easier times. And I like the silence of it now. (Well, almost silence, I know there’s the two of you floating around on here. I appreciate that. It’s relative silence. Even Drivel isn't on here anymore.)

Anyways, this whole post is mostly to myself and the universe, but I really, really need things to get easier. It’s so hard to hide all of this - all of everything from my friends. And yet I do a really, really good job. Even my closest friends don’t need to know. And plus, they don’t read this anymore anyways. I just need to be able to function enough to fix things.

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A photo of my dog because it was truly the first thing in my recents folder 

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I really don't have the ability to write incredible things anymore, much to padlet's dismay. But hey, ever wonder what's underneath you if you fall?

I don't actually have a point here. I just miss... me, and there are some traces of that here. Makes things feel normal again, ya know?

No one's noises are here.

It's sort of nice, knowing this'll go forgotten.

🎷🦐‼

That's an excited shrimp playing the saxophone. How else was I supposed to end something no one will read?

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I lied. There's no context. I just miss this thing.

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Guess who’s in a spammy mood and doesn’t wanna/can’t text 

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Guess who’s in a spammy mood and doesn’t wanna/can’t text 

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*waves hand*

BUT ALSO I JUST NOTICED THE NEW PADLET SCREEN AND IT JUST COMPLETELY ELEVATED THIS ENTIRELY SUCKY DAY

FOLKS

THERE IS, IN FACT, AN ELEPHANT ON IT

I REPEAT

AN ELEPHANT

🐘🐘🐘

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There’s literally nothing as sad as having a black background as your phone, staring at, making eye contact with yourself, and realizing that absolutely all the emotion you try to convey to another person doesn’t go through it

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Waste Fire Part 15 (II), Part 16, and a mound of procrastination

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Waste Fire Part 15 (II), Part 16, and a mound of procrastination

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*Casually isn't here*

Just kidding, just kidding. Sadly, (Or perhaps thankfully) I don't have the time for a full Padlet post, but there's nothing like being randomly struck by the desire to get this fricking website up and running again!

Also, I realized just how much I love Waste Fire. Again. It's so unedited and so stringy, but I love it so, so much. (Because... Matilda. Petrichor. SANDWICH.)

Aaaaanyways. The chapters. They exist on more than just the google doc now *waves magically*

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Listen, I know I'm not either one of the creators, so you're probably disappointed that this isn't the announcement you've been waiting for that signifies the return of Tripe and Drivel for good. I know, I'm sad too. But I figured, hey, why not keep the Padlet alive since T&D are probably swamped or just don't have motivation: I will accept either as a fair reason not to keep the website active XD
But anyways, I figured I'd ask a few questions:
Doritos or Cheetos?
Do you like the feeling of soft carpets?
In a fight, who would win?
A group of old men who have the technology to wipe people's minds and created an empire based off that tech
OR
a 13 year old and their friends who recently discovered they've all been mind wiped and brainwashed and are really feelin' that rage.

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Question; does this technically count? XDDDDDD

Like so many other things, Waste Fire has sort of been pushed to a back burner - APUSH and other homework practically DEMANDS attention.

HOWEVER!

Part 15 is out now (per the title) and I've made a few quick site edits. (Without permission, yes, I'm so sorry Drivellll - I swear it really is just images and I deleted the obnoxious qr code.)

And I know that I promise this every week, buuuut.. I'mma get back into a routine with this poor website. Back to the weekly updates - at least - and we'll drag more people back to the website. (Craig needs more attention!)

As always, thank you so much!
--
Tripe

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Hello, poor, sad, forgotten padlet. I promise I'll remember to feed and water you soon.

XDDDDDDDD
--
Tripe

(The photo was the first in my favorites folder. Yes, it's random. No, I'm not taking it down.)

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In all honesty, the title's a misnomer. Guess who hasn't checked with her co-author as to whether or not we're TRULY back... *hides*

But.

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!! Woot woot! *not, hahaha*

I swear. I KNOW I should most certanly be enjoying today. In all honesty, I sort of am - who doesn't love a school-wide rickroll at nine am, followed by a bunch of inspirational speeches that are intensely metaphorical! (Speaking of which, Drivel is TOTALLY my white line, everyone. She does a truly horrid job keeping me straight, but absolutely nails everything else! *completely aware that there's an inside joke there, laughing too hard to explain, will probably be a post eventually.*) (Seriously tho, child, I mean it.) Now that I've confused you enough...

THERE ARE CHANGES COMING! Not huge ones - as IF - but I'm actually cobbling together some more polished site graphics as we speak. Also, Waste Fire passed 100 docs pages - can I get a 'woot woot'? We'll probably get some of that up and running on the doc eventually. (We promise!)

Aaaaaaaaand... that's what I've got! I have a test that I need to study for - one... in an hour, LOL - and I'm sliiiightly panicking at the moment. Once I get a chance to stop and breathe, expect more updates via padlet.

To finish off my post, a quote from my new math teacher: "Behave... like you think is socially acceptable." (I disagree.)

And a quote from Drivel: "Condolences on your lost time."

yeaaaaaaaah... sorry XD

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So, all plans this summer went to the underworld. Have a photo.

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Yes, it’s three days late.

Yes, I understand that I’ve done basically nothing the past three days.

No, I’ve done absolutely nothing productive those three days.

But you know what? I’m changing that today. First things first, imma publish this Padlet post. In the next few hours (I know, I know, procrastination…) I’ll have some ✨things✨ Live though.

Thanks, all!

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The Padlet is telling me to write something fantastic. I'm not sure if I can do that, but I'm aiming for a solidly decent level. This screenshot is one that Tripe took of our conversation. I feel it needs no explanation :D
Anywho, there's a new post. It has more on Craig. If you haven't read Tripe's post, you should check it out! (Also, if you can't find this new post, here's a hint: It's on Tripe's page.)

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Okay - who else is reeling from the fact that it's the last full Monday of the school year? (at least for the HS - no clue on the middle school.)

Anyways, I'll keep the padlet short and sweet, but I have treasure for everyone; not only do I have a new Tripe post up, but chapter 14 of Waste Fire is now live!! Woot woot! D and I have made it a goal (sort of) to finish at a novelish length by the end of the summer - we have our work cut out for us! (Meanwhile, take the new post with a grain of metaphorical salt. I've been running on too much insecurity and not enough creativity recently, but I'm preeeetty sure I'm out of that right now.)

Annnnd... that's about it! Thanks, everyone!!

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Welcome to Tripe & Drivel! You will find your head filled with all kinds of nonsense, from essays on our opinions of the low-quality writing of authors such as William Shakeyfruit to the global implecations of the word "cattywampus". You may ask, "Why? Please, why? Just stop- PLEASE! WHY?"

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Hello, oh dearest padlet, that I feel terrible for abandoning. Expect a mini-post soon.

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I know, I know, I SHOULD do a weekly update, but alas, (Drivel, LOOK. A COMMA after ALAS. Take notes.) I have basically no time right now... because finals.

However, I have some plans to revamp the website soonish... look out for updates!!!

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How DARE you do this to such a beautiful Oreo. The shame.

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That's right - I didn't update on Monday this week. Nor did I update within a respectable timeframe today. Due to the approaching end of the year, *and finals* Drivel and I have hit a wall of academic duress - posts, sadly, are not a priority right now.

However, we both have creativity that must go SOMEWHERE before it self-destructs us (or in my case, manifests itself in MORE stress-eating) so Waste Fire will still be running, just at a slower pace.

Sorry for the short post, have to go watch a documentary on corn right now. Thanks, everyone, for your patience!!

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Part Eleven - I Went To Linn And All I Got Was A Headache And A History Lesson

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That's right - I haven't finished Nine, but Drivel and I have **OFFICIALLY** written the longest chapter YET of Waste Fire!!! Woot Woot!!!

And, because we're super generous, we'll warn you that Petrichor actually gains depth - AND a face. I'll see if I can coax Drivel into letting me post all the sketches for the characters, because they are ALL beautiful, and her art is amazing, and SANDWICH XDDD

Yeah. Anyways. BOATS!!

--
Tripe

(Oh, fun fact; the google doc is a few sentences away from the 60-page mark, and it's only been a month and a half. XDD)

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Me: "I'll post Nine part two tonight!!"

Two days later:

Me: *not even remotely done* I'll... post... it... at some point? Right? I'll work on it soon. Now. I'm going to go work on it now. Drivel is holding me accountable. *Read; hostage*. (Just kidding. I'm the one doing the kidnapping.)

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HAPPY MONDAY!!! Only a few more weeks until the end of the year!! (Which means finals, but whatever.)

As for site updates, I can't say we have much to add - Chapter Ten (Woot Woot!) of Waste Fire will go live in just a moment, and Nine II goes live later tonight!! Meanwhile, I then had interesting conversations with some juniors, and certainly some post-worthy opinions on Spring Carnival... you've all been warned :3

Outside of post news, there isn't a ton else going on... Oh, I may be consigning handmade earrings at the bookstore I work at this summer, under the name Tripe... and slowly but surely I'm coming up with website decorations. (Though, let's be honest, I'll probably make D do most of the artistry :D)

Anyways, thanks everyone!!

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Waste Fire, Part Nine - Exploding Chickens and Terrible Decisions

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Waste Fire, Part Nine - Exploding Chickens and Terrible Decisions

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Well, a couple things happened;

- I didn't make any posts this week.

- WF got revamped, double spaced, and updated in the website - now you can actually read it XDD

- The WF doc itself went past the 50-page mark, and it's only been *just* over a month

- I learned about carbon monoxide poisioning, which is DEFINITELY relevant to the story.

-D and I have officially been discussing making our own graphics for the site... and possibly DeCoRaTiNg it... There may or may not be an upgrade soon.....

- I'm planning not to end this post formally. :D

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Welcome to Tripe & Drivel! You will find your head filled with all kinds of nonsense, from essays on our opinions of the low-quality writing of authors such as William Shakeyfruit to the global implecations of the word "cattywampus". You may ask, "Why? Please, why? Just stop- PLEASE! WHY?"

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Waste Fire now has chapter titles! That's all I have to say.

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No explanation necessary. Enjoy!

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Drivel and I communicate extensively and often, mostly through text, because neither of us can teleport. (Yes, it's gotten me in trouble before - texting, not teleporting.) As recognition of our accomplishment of writing an ENTIRE chapter yesterday, I am posting the internal behind the scenes, very super secret texts that get sent while we're writing Waste Fire.

---

Just kidding! (and just FYI we've abbreviated 'your turn' into YT, which generally means we've written our chunk of work.) Yeah, this is how little communication we put into this story while we're writing. However, we do have a plan... and a semi plot... and a new character to debut... *cough cough PeTrIcHoR cough* Oh, and all our island/person names mean something, and that's all I'm giving you on that. First to figure them out wins eternal respect and a two-dimensional cube. Who knows? Maybe next, I'll post some ACTUALLY constructive texts between the two of us...  you'd never guess how much you can learn about writing from some stranger's texts. Thanks, everyone!
---
Sarcastically,
Tripe

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FINALLY, an update to Waste Fire!! (As always, be lenient with our grammar. Drivel is frustrating - she does it on purpose - and her editor/co-author can only get so far.) We're back in it to win it again... D and I have been PLUGGING away at some more chapters (and we have some new characters to debut sooner or later...) so yeah! Enjoy!

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Hey all! Happy Monday!

First and foremost, Drivel's latest post can and WILL leave you glowing. It's just THAT good. (I can't with Drivel sometimes, I tell you - she makes all this noise about her work NOT being good, and then she comes out of nowhere with posts that manage to make you feel... well. Magical.)

Meanwhile, Nine part II is going up soon, and shortly thereafter, I sort of wrote a reply to a FutureMe email I got... It's sliiiiiightly terrible, but hey, no spoilers! :D

Also, can I get a 'woot woot'? There's only a month (give or take) left in school! I mean, come on! SUMMMERRRR! Drivel and I are actually going to be in the same vicinity often throughout the course of vacation, so T&D may slow down, but it won't stop! (Come on, though, D and I are the ultimate writing duo. What could stop us?) *Glares at the fact that I haven't posted anything in AGES... Quarantine, amirite?*

Anyways, back to my ELA. We're reading Lord of the Flies... You've been warned. A bunch of boys on a beach is NOT the greatest thing ever.

Thanks, everyone!!
--
Tripe

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(This was too big to be a comment, so it became a post. Deal with it.)
OH. MY. GLOB. My dude, THAT was the most amazing article I have ever read in my lifeeeeeee! Honestly, there's so many places in education where LGBTQ+ topics are considered "controversial" and therefore not taught, but last I checked, there are plenty of controversial topics taught in school, like lessons about wars and political leaders. But as LGBTQ+ person myself, I always feel avoided and excluded (I actually wrote a whole speech about it that I'm going to read at a pride parade that the KRMS Pride Club is hosting; I can share it with you if you're interested) when we're considered too "controversial" for school. Soooo, when I hit high school, I'm considering starting a petition and going to the school board with a few friends to hopefully integrate LGBTQ+ history and education into our district's curriculum. And if you want to be a part of that, well... shoot me an email and we can begin planning this evil scheme >:D But, point of this thing, your article was AMAZING! So, great job! (And it's nice to know there are queer people at the high school who I can trust :D)

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New Drivel post! ;D

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To Those Who Care, and More Importantly, To Those Who Don't, (5/11/22)

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Hello readers, I know I haven't written for a long time or gotten any new posts done. I've been busy with a lot of school so I just wanted to let all of you know that as soon as this weekend rolls around (hopefully bringing an ounce of freetime) I will sit down with my butterbeer mug full of coffee and write a post! I make no promises on the quality of said post - but it will arrive! In the mean time, I will amuse you with a vague description of how my English class reacted to me making a raccoon simile then proceeded to rush Tripe off camera after she acted out a brutal murder (don't worry folks, it was all for educational purposes and no one was harmed in the making of the film except for a large number of black flies). Suffice to say, my class was not amused although my teacher did in fact cackle behind his desk as I stabbed a wooden sword into the ground. There's something about an English class at 8 am that reminds me of the dead silence that occurs after you watch a zombie give a presentation about textile production statistics. Anyhow, a post will come... soon.

Do the impossible. Expect the impossible. Be impossible.
-Drivel

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New post 'Nine' is up and running!! Not even remotely my best work (or even good) but I needed to do something to prove I'm still writing. Enjoy!

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Hey all!!

Well, for the first time in a long time, there's no new posts this Monday.

However, as soon as I get all my freaking homework done, I actually have ideas again!! (I know, I know, it's SHOCKING. XD)

As for any website news, expect this week's barrage of Tripe posts to be more or less at their usual volume and definitely less emotional than the ones I drafted over the weekend. I haven't gotten word back from Drivel on her planned posts, but she's most likely currently asleep, so I'll edit this if she has anything to add.

Aaaand I honestly think that's about it! We've bounced around the idea of having guest authors come write for us - Drivel, get back to me on this - so that may or may not show up soon. You've been warned. (Actually, that could be really fun to set up, D...)

Yeah! That's it! Thanks, everyone!!

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Welcome to Tripe & Drivel! You will find your head filled with all kinds of nonsense, from essays on our opinions of the low-quality writing of authors such as William Shakeyfruit to the global implecations of the word "cattywampus". You may ask, "Why? Please, why? Just stop- PLEASE! WHY?"

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I should write a post. I have tried to convince myself with varying arguments:

If it makes you cry, write it!

I’ll actually maybe start appreciating myself if I write a post

I betcha more than three people will see this post

I DARE you to write a post, self.

I bet you next week’s paycheck that you can’t write a post

You have time to make financial eBay decisions but not write a post?

Just. Write. The. Freaking. Post.

All that homework you have to do is going to just go down the drain if you do the post

How do you plan on expressing that feeling, huh? You know no one who can relate, so why not write it and feel proud of yourself, eh?

And I shall end this post with one of my better quotes;

“I’m not telling you, Drivel. It will just make both of us feel awkward and weird that we exist differently because that is one thing we can’t both relate to.”

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Hello all, as you can see, I haven't made a post in... uh, a very long time! Everytime I attempt to write something my brain decides to stop working. So, if any of you have ideas please - PLEASE - tell me. I swear I'm not desperate.
Anyway, now it's time to face the school day.

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I have this issue where I start things and don't finish them. I get distracted, and then I'm avoiding the work, and then it gets thrown in a google doc aptly named 'AAA'. (like a scream, not like a triple-A battery)

Not today, though! Today, I got distracted, but just decided to make a mini post. It's admittedly not my best work... whatever. Back to discussing philosophical problems while staring at Math. (Yes, that is a capital 'M'. All good foes deserve a proper name.)

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Matilda, amazingly given a face by Drivel (just LOOK at her 😍) 

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I'm fully aware that our website looks like we dropped off the face of the Earth. I REALLY haven't had any interesting post topics in the past week... which, I mean, is the ENTIRE point of my writing notebook, but whatever.

That said, Drivel and I are finally making forward progress on WF again, and at the pace we tend to write, hopefully we can squeeze a chapter out tomorrow. (big 'hopefully'.

And then there's the post on sports I'm grinding through... *sigh*. We'll make it work. (That'll come out today or tomorrow, hopefully!)

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You know, I feel like a pretty successful person sometimes. Someone mysterious. Someone interesting. Someone unexplainable.

Then I do things like throw the contents of a backpack on a table and realize just how much they reveal about me.

🤣🤣🤣

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The Beans, the Blog, and the Waste Fire 

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The Beans, the Blog, and the Waste Fire 

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*Hitting the weekly check in again!*

Well, it's Monday. Ew.

Waste Fire part seven is live, mostly to keep Drivel and I accountable, and to keep D from writing sentences like 'Never.' (Still frustrating, Drivel!)

I also admit, I haven't been able to make my brain do a post over vacation. I'll try to make something work during flex. (Yes, I have homework to do. Yes, I'm an amazing procrastinator.)

Anyways, there's nothing all that new on the website - just the WF update. (BUT, there was this plot that popped into existence, and heeyyyyy, I've got new character plaaans....)

Yeah. Anyways. Thanks, everyone!

**Edit: It's been brought to my attention that Split Organism disappeared. Yes, I did that. There are no weird post-ghosts on the website.**

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Miraculous art by Drivel

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Waste Fire, installment six (Among other major news!)

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Waste Fire, installment six (Among other major news!)

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Today's post REALLY didn't want to come together, but I wanted to feel productive. So instead, while Drivel sits next to me and loots a village, I'm posting part six of WF.
-------------
Hello, It's Drivel. I would like to report that the townsfolk are all safe and they may have suddenly lost their money and farmlands, but hey, at least the guard didn't push me into a hole. The trader I met with was being unreasonable so I also made a hole in his roof. Let him pay for the damages. Tripe and I are planning to go into hell soon. We are gathering the necessary supplies. Tripe says that the pigs there are meaner than they used to be which is sad, but the floating clouds that shoot fire are just the same.
-----------
Tripe again. (Drivel's not wrong, though.) Also, momentous occasion - despite the fact that her writing very consistently gravitates towards chickens, she was able to interact with many on a personal level today, for the first time. (Including one who's convinced she's a golden retreiver, one who's hormonal and failing at parenting, one who's genderfluid - no, like actually, not joking here - and one who decides at rather inopportune times that she's a hawk.  I very much think that they all deserve a blog post, but alas, no one's really all that interested in chickens. Except Drivel.)

Anyways. I really guess I should write a post now... *sigh*.

*Devises governmental system for WF instead*

*Sends Drivel a 413 word text solely about fictional governments*

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Title says it all. I could link it, but I'm sorta really lazy right now... you'll have to take my word for it :D

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Hey all! Just hitting the weekly check in today, though I'm fully aware that no one's actually going to see this for a while.

First and foremost, Waste Fire V just went live a few minutes ago. It's the last one that we've actually got completed, so don't expect anything too giant until after break.

Second, as I said last week, we're gonna be a bit quieter over vacation. (Funny story - I've FIGURATIVELY (Eh? Eh? Drivel?) been trying for three days now to formulate a post. It's not for lack of ideas... I've started like six at this point.)

Third, for the handful of people who consistently read this website, you guys ROCK. For the people who find this in the future, and wish you could be mentioned too, you ALSO ROCK. (In all seriousness, though, you guys make my day EVERY SINGLE TIME my phone gets a padlet notification. Thank you. <3)

Yeah... that just about sums it up! Thanks, everyone!

***Edit: Trying not to sound like an ad, but the Padlet app with notifications really is a game changer, for those of you who care that much XDDDDD***

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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I was bored, and that is my excuse. Consider this .5 of a post. 

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I was bored, and that is my excuse. Consider this .5 of a post. 

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:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

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Guess what! Did you guess? Did you guess that Drivel has a new post? Wow! Spot on! I wonder how you figured it out...

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Guys - this one's much less cloaked with humor. I need people to read it, though, and if I could come around to everyone with a clipboard and make them sign off that they'd understood it, I would. (Even though it would negate the entire point of this post.) If you're out there, unnamed person who crossed a line today, I do want to be a role model, and an inspiration. Just not as me - as Tripe.

I'll get my attitude back tomorrow. Just not sure where it went tonight.

--
Tripe

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I love reading this! Please add more! I love Twinkies so so so so much and Drivel's short story and poems are incredibleeeeeeeeeeee
I need to read Waste Fire still but I bet its incredible!!

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I could make this a long post, or I could just tell you to enjoy. :D

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Twinkies part II, Katniss Everdeen, seventeen dollars, and the general state of things. 

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Twinkies part II, Katniss Everdeen, seventeen dollars, and the general state of things. 

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**Edit: this is easily the longest padlet thingamijig on here, it should really count as a post this week.**

Okay, this time I ACTUALLY managed to get the second part of Twinkies out into the world. It's a pretty long read - you've been warned.

Also, just a little update on things:

First and foremost, Tuesday is officially the second week anniversary of T&D being public, and the third week of Drivel and I creating it. (WOOT WOOT! Feels like a LIFETIME!!)

Second, things may quiet down slightly on the Tripe front. Not necessarily by much; I'm just splitting time between actual posts and Waste Fire.

Third, we're looking to be seen more! I've already sent a plea to Jeff to give the website some presentation time this week during Writing Club. (Trust me, we'll be there...) We're also thinking of anonymously contributing to the KRHS newspaper, but that hasn't really gotten past the "Wouldn't it be cool if..." stage. (There are a LOT of things in that stage. Including making a plot for Waste Fire.) Point is, SHARE WITH FRIENDS!! We want ALL THE ATTENTION MWAHAHAHAH

Last but not least, T&D's probably going to go quiet for a bit over break. Expect lots of tiny anecdotes and sarcastic/entertained discoveries, but nothing too lengthy and dramatic.

Okay, I think I hit all the bases. Twinkies is going up, the whole Katniss thing is part of Twinkies, you've all been primed on the coming weeks.

Thanks for all your support, everyone!

Wait. What do you mean, I left something out?

That's not true- Oh. The dollars part. Are you sure you want seventeen dollars?

Yes? Really?? Okay, but it's going to make this post longer than necessary. Don't say I didn't warn you.

dollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollarsdollars

Satisfied now? Awesome. Go be cool people, my friends.

--
Tripe

(Next WF installment comes soon!!)

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I don't really need to put much else, do I?(Twinkies part II comes Monday!!)

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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***update: it’s live!!***

Okay. Something… happened. A good something, but still 😂

I’m not super sure how it started. Drivel and I have a shared google doc, and she wrote a sentence, and then I wrote a sentence… and then it devolved into fiction. Really, really, weird fiction. (Because we’ve been trading sentences, neither of us have any clue where the story’s going. It’s SO MUCH FUN.)

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple. (Come on, it wasn't like she was going to commit her first murder without a scapegoat, flimsy as the alibi may have been.) It had been a long and dangerous journey to find the temple where the cat resided and received offerings. Like, why was it even PHYSICALLY possible that the cat found her EVERY FREAKING NIGHT, and yet three moons had passed trying to find its den.

Six years ago, the cat, Goddess, had made its first appearance, standing on the doorstep with its silver fur shining in the moonlight. It wasn't all that big, honestly. Certainly not something that could have killed her. So. Many. FREAKING. TIMES.

Bahia had been "blessed" with immortality when she was 17. The best part? She still aged. Or... she'd been trying too. Every time the cat killed her, it set her back to the age she'd been on her blessing day, minus two minutes.

But this time - ooooooh THIS time - Goddess was sent back. And, as far as Bahia was concerned, she only had to do it another seven times.

Tonight, the moon was brighter than that first night. The star-soaked puddles at her feet sang crimson with the cat's blood, the canopy above ricocheting with the feathered witnesses above. Ah yes, the Council voiced their approval in silent hums of sorrow. Bahia DESERVED that approval, after what they'd done. But alas, after several... unfortunate situations, Bahia had learned that the Council was merely a figurehead for the true ruler of the Realm - Goddess herself.

But Bahia fixed that. I mean, for the next month or so - long enough that she might actually be able to prepare for Goddess's return this time.

Bang. There was a loud popping sound - not the popping like that of popcorn, more of the sound like when someone accidentally sets a pale blue balloon on a porcupine. (not... you know... like she'd ever done that before. And as a note: a red balloon sounds VERY different.) Startled, Bahia whipped around, the knives in her hand dropping into a puddle beneath her.

There sat Goddess, an evil grin on her feline lips and a cruel glint in her beady eye. Uttering several expletives, Bahia bent down and retrieved the knives, pointing them at the wanna-be cougar. But when Bahia raised her head again, Goddess had vanished.

"Great," Bahia yelled at the sky, exasperated. Then she felt claws sink into her back. Moments later? Dead.

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For the first time in Bahia's life, the cat didn't kill her. It had only taken... what, six years? Seven? But at last, that damned cat keeled over instead. Well, okay, maayyybbe not naturally... there had been some poison involved. And a pineapple. It was not Bahia's fault. It was the pineapple.

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Not suprisingly, I got distracted. This is not the second part of Twinkies, like it was supposed to be. Instead, it was me expressing my suffering at bad literature. Enjoy?

***UPDATE*** I forgot about the fact that Drivel FINALLY added a bio. It's literally the greatest thing on the website.

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Hi. Just read your newest post, and I'm close to tears. I don't pretend to know what your struggles and hardships, but from what I read, your experience sounds similar to mine. I also find comfort in my writing, where I can fully express myself, but at school, I'm quieter. Sure, I talk to people, but when I'm sad, I don't. When life gets scary, I make myself small. I hide when threatened, like an animal being pursued. And as for Jeff blowing your cover (so to speak), I think he has a brand of confidence and leisure that is unparalleled, and forgets sometimes that not everyone has that. I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it, but I totally get how it feels to be outed when you're not ready. I'm not having the best week, either, considering that my ex just decided that he's going to despise me now, so I feel for you. But I wasn't at WC yesterday, so rest assured, at least you have one more person to talk to that only knows you as Tripe :)
P.S. If you ever trust me with your other self and want to talk, you can email me at aubrey.brown@kearsarge.org - I'm always here if you need to talk :)

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Hello! New reader here! I love all the things on this website! Drivel's short story is amazing in every way. Tripe's posts are amazing and it's nice to learn about her, even though I don't know who she is!

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I totally wrote an essay about racisim for ELA... but it turned into this. This is part one. You've been warned.

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Hey there! I'm a friend of Sage's, just saying hi and thank you for making  admittedly the most odd website I've ever had the honor to experience! I was wicked bored this week, but then yesterday our lord and savior Jeff Maguire (who I think you know) gave the KRMS Writing Club the link to this miraculous hub of chaos. I've read everything you've posted as of 4/6/22 and I am in hysterics at how awesome this website is! If/when I decide to make a website for the KRMS Writing Club (which is a big shush-shush operation I've been planning) I'm planning on putting the link in this padlet so we can collectively share our created chaos! (also, I apologize for the long post; "writing the minimum" will never be something I can achieve)

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I was having a pretty bad day yesterday when Jeff showed writing club this website. It was the highlight of my day, and that was just reading the author bios. Now that I have 'time' (among wayyy too much homework) I read the entire website as of 4/6/22. Thank you for making my day brighter. Now I feel awkward for being the first non-author to comment... I'll deal with that later. I can't wait for this to be updated again!

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Hi I posted like 2 seconds ago but now I have an account

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I feel like I'm slacking off, so I'll put my recent conversation with Google Docs in Padlet.

Me: *typing aggressively* I... have... Very... few...

Docs: Friends! You have very few friends, right? Let me write that for you here.

Me: No, actually. I have friends (like, two of them), Docs, and that's not even what I was trying to put to begin with. I'm trying to write about my hobbies. *Deletes 'friends'*

Docs: Fine. Whatever. But here, let me assign a numerical value to your hobbies.

Me: No-

Docs: You have three hobbies now! And your cursor won't let you delete it for no reason, so now you have to make do.

Me: Fine. Next line. "I also have very few..."

Docs: OH, I KNOW THIS ONE! It's FRIENDS, right?

Me: NO. I have very few WORRIES.

Docs: That's a lie, but okay...

Me: Last line... "Finally, I have a lot of..."

Docs: PROBLEMS!! You don't know it, but you want to put PROBLEMS there. I'll do it for you again, even though you've gotten mad at me before.

Me: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Me: Submits doc without deleting it

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Quote of the century:

"I may be quiet. But that doesn't mean I'm shy. It just means I'm judging you. "
-Drivel