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By Linda Rodgers
Panic attacks can be really scary. They can come on suddenly and flood your body with fear or a sense of doom. If you've never had a panic attack, this is what they can feel like:

Feeling as if you can't breathe.

A fear that you may be dying.

A tightness in-or heavy weight on-your chest, kind of like how people describe heart attacks.

A racing, fluttering, or pounding heart.

Sweating.

Trembling or shaking.

Tingling hands or feet.

Feeling as if you're having an out-of-body experience. You're somewhere far away so it's hard to hear or even understand anything being said to you.

Panic attacks can be frightening and overwhelming, but they don't last long-even though they're intense and in the moment you think they'll go on forever.

You may not be able to stop a panic attack, but you can use strategies that make it shorter and less overwhelming. The best way is to get your mind off what you're feeling and thinking and onto something that distracts and grounds you in the present moment.

Here's how:

Say What's Happening

Tell yourself, "I'm having a panic attack." Just naming it can help you calm down.

Work to Slow Your Breathing

Lie down if you want, then try some triangle breaths. (Breathe in for three counts, hold for three counts, breathe out for three counts.) Or put your hands on your belly and breathe deeply, watching your hands rise and fall.
Find more breathing and grounding exercises .

Grab Something Cold

Try one of these:

Drink a glass of very cold water.

Drape a wet washcloth on your neck.

Splash your face with cold water.

Run your hands under cold water.

You only need to do one of these things, but any of them will pull you out of your head and into the part of your body experiencing the taste or feel of something cold. It is both distracting and grounding.

Change Your Scene

If you can, go outside and look at the grass, a tree, or the cars driving by. Listen to the birds, the sound of the wind, or someone's conversation. If you can't leave where you are, look around and notice elements of the room. There's a desk. Over there is a curtain. Here's my backpack next to me. It will shift your awareness away from the panic symptoms and onto your physical surroundings.

Smell or Taste Something Strong

If you experience panic attacks, it's a great idea to keep something with a strong or calming odor in your backpack or bag, such as an essential oil, car freshener, or Chapstick, says Jennifer Teplin, LCSW, a licensed therapist and founder of Manhattan Wellness in New York City. Pull it out and take a whiff. Or pop a sour candy or strong mint in your mouth and suck on it. The trick is to stimulate your sense of smell or taste so it overrides the part of the brain that's panicking.
Learn how to build your anxiety toolkit so you have the things you need on hand.

Talk to Yourself

Telling yourself, "This will pass," "I can get through this," "I'm not dying," or "I'm not having a heart attack" can help you get through these uncomfortable moments. Another way to be prepared for a possible panic attack is to write down helpful statements, such as, "You're OK. Just breathe and this will pass." Keep them in your bag or backpack for next time.

If you're prone to panic attacks-read more about -you may find it helpful to speak to a panic disorder here therapist or counselor. There is affordable mental health care out there. There are also ways to get help from a therapist who shares your cultural background and understands your particular needs. Go to our How to Get Help page to check out the resources you need to help you along your journey.

Watch: Why You Feel Like You're Dying (But You're Not)

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Quick, effective ways you can manage a panic attack right now.

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Any educator can become an ally, but the journey might look different depending on one’s identity, experience and familiarity with issues of power and privilege.

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One Love Foundation is a national non-profit organization with the goal of ending relationship abuse. We empower young people with the tools and resources they need to see the signs of healthy and unhealthy relationships and bring life-saving prevention education to their communities.

More than 1 in 3 women will be in an abusive relationship in their lifetimes

1 in 3 men will be in an abusive relationship in their lifetime

1 in 2 trans or nonbinary people will be in an abusive relationship in their lifetime

Need to talk to someone? Get advice and information 24/7. Our trusted partners can help if you are experiencing or exhibiting unhealthy or abusive behavior, or need advice for someone in your life.

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Learn about Relationships - One Love Foundation

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Join One Love's mission to educate young people about healthy and unhealthy relationships and empower them to avoid abuse

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Healthy relationships for young adults can be confusing. Love is more than just the way you feel, and we’re here to help.

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As the new school year begins, PAVE's Survivors.org is experiencing an increase in demand for services. During this time, college students enter a period called the "Red Zone" from the beginning of the school year through Thanksgiving break, during which the majority of campus sexual assaults take place. High school students are also at increased risk due to factors such as social events, homecoming, and other student gatherings.

We are passionate about providing education to students, parents, and school staff about healthy relationships, bystander intervention, suicide prevention, and supporting survivors.

When making a donation to PAVE's Survivors.org Back to School campaign, you will receive a digital Self-Care Essentials Backpack that is our gift for your support. This is perfect for you or to send to a friend or student!

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As the new school year begins, PAVE's Survivors.org is experiencing an increase in demand for services. During this time, college students enter a period called the "Red Zone" from the beginning of the school year through Thanksgiving break, during which the majority of campus sexual assaults take place.

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Active Minds Blog - Mental Health Messages of Hope

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The Active Minds' blog is a collection of mental health experiences shared by real young adults across the country that give messages of hope.

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From MHA's President & CEO, Schroeder Stribling

June is Pride month - a time to honor the LGBTQ+ community, to lift their voices, celebrate their cultures, and recognize the progress and remaining work in the fight for LGBTQ+ rights. Inspired by the 1969 Stonewall Uprising, a tipping point in the LGBTQ+ rights movement in the United States, Pride is part celebration and part political activism. While a lot has changed in the 53 years since the Stonewall Uprising, the LGBTQ+ community still faces discrimination interpersonally and systemically.

Inequity harms mental health. While being LGBTQ+ is NOT a mental health condition or concern, LGBTQ+ individuals experience mental health struggles at higher rates than their straight and cisgender peers. Mental health challenges among the LGBTQ+ community are primarily due to individuals facing stigma, discrimination, and bias in many forms.

LGBTQ+ individuals can be incredibly resilient and thrive in the face of adversity with the help of supportive families, peers, and communities. But the ultimate protective factor in LGBTQ+ mental health is removing these adversities altogether, which we can work to achieve through creating informed and affirming environments. MHA thanks Janssen: Pharmaceutical Companies of Johnson & Johnson and Otsuka America Pharmaceutical, Inc. for supporting our public education efforts.

How is Pride Relevant to Mental Health in 2022?

With an increasing amount of anti-LGBTQ+ legislation being proposed and enacted across the United States, 2022 has been a particularly difficult year for many LGBTQ+ people whose identities are being politicized. Not only does each discriminatory bill harm the LGBTQ+ individuals that it directly impacts, it also sends a broader message that LGBTQ+ people don't have the right to exist or thrive in the ways that non-LGBTQ+ folks do.

Fast Facts

LGBTQ+ people are twice as likely as non-LGBTQ+ people to have a mental health condition and continue to show disparities in mental health, even though they are more likely to use mental health services.

People who identify as LGBTQ+ have more frequent suicidal thoughts, and rates are continuing to rise. Fifty-six percent of LGBTQ+ individuals who took an MHA depression screen in 2021 reported having suicidal thoughts more than half or nearly every day of the previous two weeks - nearly 7% higher than the reported rate in 2019. (MHA Screening)

The Trevor Project reports that 73% percent of LGBTQ+ youth report experiencing symptoms of anxiety, 58% report symptoms of depression, and 45% report having seriously considered attempting suicide in the past year.

According to the U.S. Transgender Survey, 40% of transgender adults have attempted suicide during their lifetime, compared to less than 5% of the general U.S. population.

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June is Pride month - a time to honor the LGBTQ+ community, to lift their voices, celebrate their cultures, and recognize the progress and remaining work in the fight for LGBTQ+ rights. Inspired by the 1969 Stonewall Uprising, a tipping point in the LGBTQ+ rights movement in the United States, Pride is part celebration and part political activism.

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https://self-compassion.org/category/exercises/#guided-meditations

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How do you think things might change if you responded to yourself in the same way you typically respond to a close friend when he or she is suffering? This exercise walks you through it.

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PAVE - Shattering the Silence of Sexual Violence

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PAVE - Shattering the Silence of Sexual Violence

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By, Jessica Pettitt After Kobe Bryant's passing (as well as his daughter and other passengers), I was having a conversation with one of the best parents I happen to know and something odd happened that I want to share. I had posted first a joke that called out Kobe's...

Learn how to support survivors, and prevent sexual violence!

Click here to purchase through July 31, 2019. Click here to donate to support PAVE's sexual assault prevention and survivor support programs!

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By, Jessica Pettitt After Kobe Bryant's passing (as well as his daughter and other passengers), I was having a conversation with one of the best parents I happen to know and something odd happened that I want to share. I had posted first a joke that called out Kobe's...

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I Have the Right To

"I Have the Right To" is the battle cry for all of us to protect our rights as human beings, and to be heard, be believed, and seek justice for wrongs against us and loved ones. It is all of us uniting as one to seek a life free from aggression and sexual violence. Here you will find a forum to share and be supported: support for those who want to speak out - where to get legal services from professionals who care and understand what you are feeling - and a multitude of ways to share, be heard, and feel the strength of all of us. You are not alone!

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I Have the Right to is the official page of the "IHaveTheRightTo" nonprofit. Please join us in the fight against sexual assault and unwanted aggression and reclaim your name and your rights as a human being. Here you will find a community that will believe you, support you, and you will be heard.

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How to be an ally: What you can do as a bystander to race- based harassment or violence 

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How to be an ally: What you can do as a bystander to race- based harassment or violence 

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As coronavirus cases began to climb in the spring of 2020, so did incidents of anti-Asian harassment and violence.

Anti-Asian hate speech and a permissive attitude toward prejudice came from the top, with the then-president of the United States talking about the "China virus" and the "kung flu."

On Tuesday, a white man killed eight people, including six Asian women, at three different spas in Atlanta. The victim's names are Xiaojie Tan, Delaina Ashley Yaun, Paul Andre Michels, Soon Chung Park, Hyun Jung Grant, Suncha Kim, Yong Ae Yue and Daoyou Feng.

The killings rocked the Asian American community, already on edge after the wave of race-based violence during the pandemic. Just this week in San Francisco, a 70-year-old Asian woman fought off an attacker by herself.

Issues with data collection and poor rates of reporting make it impossible to accurately capture the number of anti-Asian hate crimes in this country. But some groups are working to shed light on how that hatred manifests.

In a new report, the group Stop Asian-American and Pacific Islander (AAPI) Hate detailed 3,795 incidents of anti-Asian harassment and violence. Of the incidences, reported from March 19, 2020, to Feb. 28, 2021, 68.1% were verbal harassment; 20.1% were avoidance or shunning; 11.1% were physical assaults; and 6.8% were online harassment. Women reported incidents 2.3 times as often as men. In addition, 7.2% of victims said they were coughed or spat on. Stop AAPI Hate has a list of safety tips available in multiple languages for people who may be the victims of harassment.

If you witness someone saying or doing something racist, what can you do to safely intervene and help the victim? Several organizations offer guides and workshops for bystander intervention.

Here's how to be an effective bystander and a good ally.
Practice the 5 Ds
The most important thing to know about intervening as a bystander is that your job is to create a safe atmosphere for the targeted person, not to confront the attacker. You aren't Batman stepping in to fight the bad guys. You're a human, being a friend to someone who needs it.

"You don't have to be a superhero or make some huge superhero gesture to intervene," said Jorge Arteaga, the deputy director of Hollaback, an organization that provides workshops, training and education materials to help end harassment. (Hollaback just added additional free virtual workshops on bystander training.)

In fact, confronting the perpetrator is likely to backfire, said Courtney Mangus, a programs manager for CAIR California, a civil rights advocacy group that offers workshops on bystander intervention. A person who's already coming from a place of aggression will likely continue to escalate the situation if you get involved. So ignore them. She said you want to create a safe space for the target and give them an option to leave the situation. You aren't their savior swooping in to rescue them. You're a fellow human being acting from a place of kindness and support.

So what does that look like? Let's say you're on a public hiking trail and you hear someone shout a slur, or you're on a train and you see someone loudly saying racist things in the earshot of a person of that race. Hollaback has a list of what it calls that constitute your options.

Distract. This is often the most helpful and effective thing you can do. The goal here is to interrupt the incident and indirectly derail the attacker. One method is by making conversation. Approach the targeted person and start talking about something unrelated. "Do you know if this trail goes up past the Hollywood sign?" "Does this train stop at Union Station?"

Keep the perpetrator in your peripheral vision, but focus on being physically present with the affected person. Help them find an exit: "Do you want to get off at the next stop with me?" "Want to walk over there with me and check out the view?"

"Be with them just like a friend would be," Mangus said.

You can also create a small distraction: Spill your water bottle, or drop something on the ground. Disrupt what's happening and draw focus away from the targeted person. Even just physically placing yourself between the perpetrator and the victim can serve as enough of a buffer to throw them off.

If you see someone being mistreated by a store employee, such as by refusing them service or making racist comments, ask the targeted person how you can help, said Manjusha Kulkarni, the executive director of the Asian Pacific Policy and Planning Council and the co-founder of Stop AAPI Hate. Introduce yourself and ask what you can do or what they need (find the manager? Walk them out of the store and to their car?) and take it from there.

"It is really about centering that person," Kulkarni said.

Delegate. Find a person in a position of authority - the store manager, a transit employee - to let them know what's going on and ask them to intervene. Or find someone in the immediate vicinity who may be better able to intervene than you.

Document. If you don't feel safe intervening, you can help by documenting the incident. In California, you have the legal right to take photos and video when you are in public. The attacker might escalate the situation if they realize they're being photographed, so try to do this in an unobtrusive way.

Delay. You might not feel safe intervening until after the attacker has moved on. Once that happens, you can still help by checking in with the victim.

It might not seem like an "intervention" at all since you aren't acting in the moment, Arteaga said, but he said his group's research indicates that even a knowing glance from another person after an incident can reduce the trauma for the victim. Express solidarity and let them know that what happened wasn't OK, and that you want to check in.

"I'm so sorry that happened to you."

"Can I call someone for you?"

"Can I walk with you somewhere?"

Direct. Only do this if you feel safe and comfortable speaking up. This is the riskiest response, because you can't know how the perpetrator will react.

Avoid direct confrontation if the attacker has already been violent, Mangus said: "If someone has made physical contact, they're already showing that they're escalated enough, that they don't see that there's a boundary between your body."

If you do feel safe, say something like, "Leave them alone," or "That's inappropriate/racist/disrespectful/not OK." Keep it short and don't engage in a discussion or argument. Then pivot back to helping the victim.
What about calling the police?
Everyone interviewed for this article cautioned against defaulting to calling the police as your first response to witnessing harassment.

In most cases, Mangus said, the police officer who shows up will be the only person with a firearm. That instantly escalates the situation. And in the United States, there is a documented history of police harming the person they were called to help, particularly if that person is Black.

If the attacker has a firearm, Mangus said, that's a good indication that you should call the police. But otherwise, try to resolve the situation without getting police involved.

There are other ways to seek government-based accountability and redress without calling the police, Kulkarni said. is a community-based campaign that lets people report hateful incidents to 211, which is not affiliated with law enforcement. It does not have to rise to the level of a hate crime to merit reporting, Kulkarni said.

"Hate crimes are a very small minority of what Asians are experiencing right now," she said. "We can't police our way out of this problem; we can't prosecute our way out of this problem."
How to be a good ally right now
There are ways to be a good ally proactively. Posting a "Stop Asian Hate" graphic to Instagram is nice, but only if it's the start of your activism. Kulkarni compared it to putting up a "Love Not Hate" sign in your yard. It's a good way to indicate that you're an ally, but you have to back it up with action.

Stop AAPI Hate has a list of ways to get involved and act right now. Here are a few ideas to get you started.

Hold your people accountable. If someone on your Facebook feed posts something about the "China virus," call them out on it, either publicly or in a private message. Let them know that if they say something like that, they're going to get pushback. It's probably not going to be productive to engage with anonymous trolls online, Kulkarni said, but if it's someone you know personally, there's a chance of getting through to them. Or, at the very least, letting them know that people aren't OK with what they're saying.

Educate yourself. America has an ugly history of anti-Asian racism and violence. Read books and articles to become more knowledgeable about our country's history. Lean more on what legal protections people have to be treated fairly in businesses. And educate yourself on ways to help, like signing up for one of Hollaback's virtual bystander intervention trainings.

Get civically engaged. Kulkarni mentioned the number of people who publicly spoke at City Council and Police Commission meetings last summer during the Black Lives Matter movement. All those meetings are still taking place over Zoom, which means it's easier than ever to weigh in and demand accountability and action.

Support local businesses owned by Asian people. Since the start of the pandemic, many Asian-owned businesses have suffered from racist backlash. Show them your support by being a customer.

Donate to anti-hate and civil rights organizations. Contribute to groups pushing back against hate. In other words: Put your money where your posts are.

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How to be an ally: What you can do as a bystander to race-based harassment or violence

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As coronavirus cases began to climb in the spring of 2020, so did incidents of anti-Asian harassment and violence. Anti-Asian hate speech and a permissive attitude toward prejudice came from the top, with the then-president of the United States talking about the "China virus" and the "kung flu."

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How to manage your mental health | Leon Taylor | TEDxClapham

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A mental illness is a condition that affects a person's thinking, feeling or mood. Such conditions may affect someone's ability to relate to others and function each day. Each person will have different experiences, e ven people with the same diagnosis.

Recovery, including meaningful roles in social life, school and work, is possible, especially when you start treatment early and play a strong role in your own recovery process.

A mental health condition isn't the result of one event. Research suggests multiple overlapping causes. Genetics, environment and lifestyle influence whether someone develops a mental health condition. A stressful job or home life makes some people more susceptible, as do traumatic life events like being the victim of a crime. Biochemical processes and circuits and basic brain structure may play a role, too.

"This speed, savvy, and importance placed on unconditional support regardless of my circumstances was the rallying cry of my parents throughout my recovery, even when I fought them on it."
Read More of My Parents' Support Shaped My Recovery

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A mental illness is a condition that affects a person's thinking, feeling or mood. Such conditions may affect someone's ability to relate to others and function each day. Each person will have different experiences, e ven people with the same diagnosis.

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Help your friends when you notice something is wrong.​ Learn how to recognize the signs and help a friend get support.

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While you might hang out with your friends a lot, the reality is that you're not always physically with them. While texting, group chats, and DMs can be common forms of keeping in touch, they can cloud any evidence of concerning body language or tone you would typically see hanging out in person. So how do you know if something is off?

Keep an eye out for these signs that could indicate your friend is struggling with their mental health:

Posting captions, hashtags, or emojis that are overtly sad or negative- they go beyond sarcastic jokes.

Liking posts or following accounts that promote negative behaviors- even if they aren't sharing it to their feeds.

Writing posts or comments that show impulsive behavior, irritability, hostility, or indicate insomnia.

Whether it's on social media, in group chats, or during a hangout - if you suspect your friend is struggling, trust your gut.

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Learn the Signs - Subpage Having a Conversation

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You might not be certain your friend is displaying worrisome signs regarding their mental health. Here are a few signs to look for as a guide.

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10 Ways to Be an Ally & a Friend

10 Ways to Be an Ally & a Friend

1. Be a listener.

2. Be open-minded.

3. Be willing to talk.

4. Be inclusive and invite LGBT friends to hang out with your friends and family.

5. Don't assume that all your friends and co-workers are straight. Someone close to you could be looking for support in their coming-out process. Not making assumptions will give them the space they need.

6. Anti-LGBT comments and jokes are harmful. Let your friends, family and co-workers know that you find them offensive.

7. Confront your own prejudices and bias, even if it is uncomfortable to do so.

8. Defend your LGBT friends against discrimination.

9. Believe that all people, regardless of gender identity and sexual orientation, should be treated with dignity and respect.

10. If you see LGBT people being misrepresented in the media, contact us at glaad.org.

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10 Ways to Be an Ally & a FriendBe a listener.Be open-minded.Be willing to talk.Be inclusive and invite LGBT friends to hang out with your friends and family.Don't assume that all your friends and co-workers are straight. Someone close to you could be looking for support in their coming-out process.

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T oo often, friends are the forgotten support mechanisms for those with a mental illness. Your support is crucial and necessary, so it's important for you to have access to the right information. The resources and the information provided on our website are designed to help you support the ones you love, while making sure you take care of yourself at the same time. Don't forget to take a look at the Tool Box as well - it's full of tools and resources designed to help you be the best support you can be for your friend. Educate yourself with these resources and help change the conversation.

The resources and the information provided on our website are designed to help you support the ones you love, while ensuring you take care of yourself while doing so. Make sure you educate yourself with these sources and help change the conversation.

Additional resources for friends

Worldwide progress is being made to help enrich our understanding of mental health, mental illness and how our brains function. We wanted to highlight some other places where you might find information that suits your needs.

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T oo often, friends are the forgotten support mechanisms for those with a mental illness. Your support is crucial and necessary, so it's important for you to have access to the right information. The resources and the information provided on our website are designed to help you support the ones you love, while making sure you take care of yourself at the same time.

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K-12 Director of Counseling and US Counselor

jwoods@potomacschool.org

703-873-5573

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https://potomacschool.padlet.org/rvonglahn/1ng94tjlcvv7

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Caron has designed this resource to educate people about the disease of addiction. By providing a high-level understanding of the physical and psychological symptoms, we can help individuals and/or their families identify if they need help and access critical information about treatment and tools to maintain recovery.

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Welcome to Addiction 101. Caron has designed this resource to educate people about the disease of addiction. By providing a high-level understanding of the physical and psychological symptoms, we can help individuals and/or their families identify if they need help and access critical information...

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7-12 grade Counselor and K-12 LEAP Program Leadership

psingleton@potomacschool.org

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Some days it's easy to motivate yourself to do the right things.

You hop out of bed and take the day by storm.

Other days...

You'd do anything to crawl back into your covers, roll up into a ball, and try again tomorrow.

And with the craziness of our world lately, the second scenario is likely playing out more often.
This post contains affiliate links, at no cost to you. See my disclaimer for more info.
For me, I recently noticed a lack of motivation in these scenarios especially...

I need to get up early - Eh, what's the point.

I should eat a healthy lunch - Why bother?

I want to work on a new helpful blog post - I just don't feel like it

But then I realized I was letting external forces dictate how I lived my life. My excuses had gained way too much power. As they occasionally do.

So, I took a deep breath, and got back into my routines. Renewed the commitment. And refueled my inspiration.

Certainly, motivation is an up and down journey, for all of us. But there are proven tricks to motivate yourself and keep the spark burning when a blazing fire is hard to come by.

Let's check it out!

How to Get & Stay Motivated

1. START

Just do it.

It's Nike's slogan for a reason. If you give yourself a few extra seconds, you come up with dozens of seemingly logical excuses. So, move towards action BEFORE your brain has time to conspire against you.

And start small. Even if it's the tiniest thing you can think of. Tie your shoes. Write a sentence. Read one paragraph. Simply TAKE ACTION.

Then, repeat. These small wins will build the momentum you need to make monumental strides in the long run.

2. Get plenty of Inspiring Input

Don't let a day go by without inspiring yourself in some fashion. Often, when we feel low it's because we're receiving too much of the WRONG input. Instead, find motivation material to hit the ground running and gain perspective on the big picture.

Are you motivating yourself with any of these?

3. Set Small Goals

Dave Ramsey's debt payment model is massively successful because he uses a very simple principle. Momentum building.

In his debt snowball strategy, he advises you to pay the smallest debts first regardless of the interest rate, therefore building a "snowball" towards your bigger ones.

The thing is, we can all utilize this principle!, Set small goals that lead to your bigger, more audacious goals. Want to run a 10K? Start with one mile, then two, and before you know it, six will be easy!

As you hit those smaller targets you'll motivate yourself to keep going.

4. Measure your Progress

The feeling of progress brings us incredible drive.

So, be sure to take measurements, write down Xs in a calendar, or do something else that marks the hard work you're putting in and the results you're slowly seeing.

5. Start a Gratitude Journal

It's hard to motivate yourself if you're in a negative place. So, practice finding the good on a regular basis, both with your surroundings and the progress you've made.

A gratitude journal like the five-minute journal is a great way to record the blessings in your day.

6. Try positive Affirmations
I am strong. I am productive. I am prosperous.
Need a little initiative? Remind yourself of how awesome you are. Check out some great affirmations here.

7. Play Energy Inducing Music

According to the research in Temptation, we procrastinate the most when we're in a bad mood. While gratitude (#5) helps tremendously, a little dancing music does the trick to get out of that funk as well!

8. Don't Break the Chain

Motivation is not constant. It ebbs and flows and most often HABIT is what we truly fall back. Our daily systems MATTER enormously.

So, set a rule that you never miss more than a day at a time. Be kind to yourself and take a day off if you need to. But then jump right back on to continue building your momentum.

9. Reduce Distractions

Often, we seek meaningless activities as an escape route when things get hard. Let's check Instagram instead of doing those push-ups. Or watch a show instead of working on that meaningful project.

So, how can we make distractions less harmful? Try one of these:

Periodically delete your most distracting apps.

Put the remote in a separate room.

Try a digital detox

Put a timer on your router to go off at a certain time of night.

There are countless, small, one time actions that add YEARS of motivation and productivity in the long run.

Check out: Easy Ways to Spend Less Time on Your Phone for more!

10. Utilize Your Routines

Think about what gets you fired up. How do you BEST motivate yourself now?

A picture of someone where you want to be? A few good jumping jacks? The Rock?

Whatever it is, can you incorporate it into your daily routines?

A motivating quote you see in the home office, or a fiery affirmation while you shower can make the difference in how you go about the rest of your day.

11. Compare Only Yourself

Our technological world makes it ridiculously easy to compare ourselves to others. And often, we don't realize we're doing it. Yet, comparing yourself to others is a fast track to sabotaging your motivation.

"That person looks amazing, so maybe I should just give up." you say to yourself unaware.

So, be very cautious about what you look at on social media, take a step back from anything that provokes comparison, and be sure that you're only around those that make you feel good.

12. Get Accountability

(How to Motivate Yourself on Steroids)

Truly, my habits and motivation have changed DRAMATICALLY since I unleashed the power of peer pressure. I began with a weekly accountability partner which led to a group and the SPAR! app.

And I've never before accomplished so much towards my health, happiness, and impact.

Here are just a few habits I do now that I didn't do before:

Daily smoothies

5 am wake up with exercise, meditation, and journaling

75 pushups, 75 squats, and 75 sit-ups a day

Exponentially better self-care and positive actions

Truthfully, I have other people to thank for most of these - accountability!

13. Remember Your WHY

When the excuses set in, it's hard to remember what the point actually is. But it's important to live life by design, not by default.

So, battle this fatigue by writing down your goals and creating a vision board to see daily. It's difficult for the excuses to win when you look at this kind of targeted motivation.

*If your goals and vision board don't completely fire you up, begin again and go deeper into what you want.

14. Reflect on the Outcomes

Additionally, to motivate yourself quickly, reflect on what you want your life to look like in 5 years.

Where will you be if you don't change?

Then, if you do change?

Really see and feel the different scenarios to make it real.

15. Organize

We have a clearer and more determined mind if we're not battling mountains of clutter. So, simplify your surroundings for an easier time reaching your goals.

Related posts:

16. Prioritize

Often we lose motivation because there's just too much. Too much going on. Too much to accomplish. Too much stimulation. It's overwhelming and we don't know where to start. So, we sit paralyzed instead.

Start with, what's the most impactful thing you can do to move forward? Then choose two more. Get those three things done and let go of the rest.

17. Rest When Needed

Lasting results can't take place without periods of relaxation.

Burnout runs rampant in our culture because we fail to see how CRITICAL rest and self-care are. Rest is not optional.

So, if you're feeling down and out about your goals. PLAN to rest for a short period and come back inspired. It will be worth it.

18. Celebrate your Wins

Every small win is a triumphant point in the journey. It deserves to be celebrated!

So, give yourself a mental pat on the back or use small rewards to stay motivated. Those who take a moment to notice their forward progress, tend to make it farther.

19. Change your Physiology

Stuck in a motivation rut? Can't seem to get it together?

Do something different! If only for a moment.

Stop what you're doing and exercise for ten minutes, meditate for two, or go outside and watch a bird. Get out of your head and change your state of being.

20. Journal For Better Awareness

Become more aware, then learn and adjust. It's the basis for a life well-lived.

Of course, journaling is an unmatchable tool for better awareness. Feeling low on a particular day? Write about it. How do you feel? What do you think is causing it? And can you add any of the tips from this post to remedy the procrastination?

Related Post: Start an Incredible Journal Habit

21. Mix It Up

How to best motivate yourself can change!

The other day, I got halfway through my workout and WAS NOT feeling it. I was lethargic and badly wanted to crawl back into my warm bed.

So, I decided to do some sprints in my backyard instead. I changed mid-workout and had no real structure. It turned out that it was BEAUTIFUL and peaceful outside. As a result, I was unusually fired up by the time I was done.

In short, consider a change of routine, scenery, or time when you need a boost.

22. Schedule It In

Good planning is essential for showing up even when motivation feels elusive.
So, map your weeks out ahead of time - Sundays are a great time for this. Decide what's important for you to get done, and when exactly you will do it.

Then, go a step further and set your clothes out, get your coffee ready to go, and do whatever else you need to in order to make forward progress easy.

Related post: Sunday Habits for an Amazing Week

23. Realize That You're Going to Fail

Even in the most successful environments, we fail. Which is a good thing!

If you're taking risks, failing is crucial to growth. Instead of getting discouraged, be ready for it. Anticipate that there will be trials and see it for what it is: part of the incredible journey. So, bring it on life.

"Failure is just growth in wolf's clothing."
Robin Sharma

In Conclusion

Finally, remember that we are all unique. Different things motivate different people. So, experiment with what works best for you.

Furthermore, we will never ALWAYS be motivated.

So, use these tips to keep stoking your fire, but also build the routines and habits you need when you encounter a pothole in the road. They are ALL essential for success.
How do you motivate yourself when it's hard? I'd love to know!
Other personal growth posts to enjoy...

How to Motivate Yourself

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How to Motivate Yourself When It's Hard, 23 Easy Tips

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You hop out of bed and take the day by storm. Other days... You'd do anything to crawl back into your covers, roll up into a ball, and try again tomorrow. And with the craziness of our world lately, the second scenario is likely playing out more often.

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5-8th Grade Counselor
wparry@potomacschool.org
703-873-6164

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All it takes is 10 mindful minutes | Andy Puddicombe

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Nexus Academy | Personalized Drug & Alcohol Rehab

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The Best Mindfulness Activities for Teens | Nexus Academy

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Learn the best mindfulness activities for teens to reduce stress, boost focus, and well-being. Fun, simple exercises to cultivate calm and self-awareness daily!

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By now there's a good chance you've heard the term "mindfulness." It seems to be everywhere-touted as the new yoga, the answer to stress, the alternative to Xanax. But beyond the buzz, what is it? Jon Kabat-Zinn, the scientist and widely recognized father of contemporary, medically based mindfulness-over 30 years ago he developed a therapeutic meditation practice known as Mindful Based Stress Reduction (MBSR)-defines mindfulness simply as "paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment and non-judgmentally."

That's the short version. To expand on that just a little, mindfulness is a meditation practice that begins with paying attention to breathing in order to focus on the here and now-not what might have been or what you're worried could be. The ultimate goal is to give you enough distance from disturbing thoughts and emotions to be able to observe them without immediately reacting to them.

In the last few years mindfulness has emerged as a way of treating children and adolescents with conditions ranging from ADHD to anxiety, autism spectrum disorders, depression and stress. And the benefits are proving to be tremendous.

But how do you explain mindfulness to a five year-old? When she's teaching mindfulness to children, Amy Saltzman, MD, a holistic physician and mindfulness coach in Menlo Park, California, prefers not to define the word but rather to invite the child to feel the experience first-to find their "still, quiet place."

"We begin by paying attention to breath," she says. "The feeling of the expansion of the in-breath, the stillness between the in-breath and the out-breath. I invite them to rest in the space between the breaths. Then I explain that this still quiet place is always with us-when we're sad, when we're angry, excited, happy, frustrated. They can feel it in their bodies. And it becomes a felt experience of awareness. They can learn to observe their thoughts and feelings, and the biggest thing for me is they can begin to choose their behaviors."

In her private practice, Saltzman, and her Still Quiet Place CDs for Young Children and Teens, teaches mindfulness to children and adolescents with a variety of challenges. "I work with kids individually with ADHD, with anxiety, depression, autism, anger management issues. The lovely thing about working one-on-one is you get to tailor what you offer to them."

Saltzman also conducted a study in conjunction with researchers at Stanford University showing that after 8 weeks of mindfulness training, the fourth through sixth graders in the study had documented decreases in anxiety, and improvements in attention. They were less emotionally reactive and more able to handle daily challenges and choose their behavior.

As a teacher at The Nantucket New School where every student gets instruction in mindfulness, Allison Johnson has learned first hand what a difference it can make for kids. So she tried it at home. "I have a six-year-old son with ADHD," she says. "I brought a chime home. We use it most nights before bed. 'Cause he doesn't love going to sleep. We sit on the floor facing each other, we close our eyes and we ring the chime. Sometimes we incorporate a visualization-like he's floating on a cloud. We go on this little journey. And we ring the chime again and we say 'when you can no longer hear the chime it's time to open your eyes and come back to focus.' And now if he gets in trouble and gets sent to his room, I can hear him upstairs doing it himself. Or when he's getting unusually rowdy he'll say 'okay lets do our mindful breathing now.'" Johnson says since Curren started practicing mindfulness she's seen subtle but noticeable differences in his behavior. "He's more able to bring his focus and attention back to where they were-remembering to raise his hand and not move around so much."

While the research on children and adolescents is really just beginning to gain real traction, there are several small studies showing that for kids who suffer from anxiety and ADHD, mindfulness can be especially helpful. Diana Winston, author of Wide Awake and the Director of Mindfulness Education at UCLA's Mindful Awareness Research Center, started taking teens with ADHD on retreats for what she calls "mindfulness intensive camp" back in 1993. Twenty years later the program is still going strong.

" Teens benefit tremendously," she says. "Kids talk about their lives being transformed. I remember one girl with ADD who'd been very depressed and I didn't think we were reaching her. On the last day of class she came in and said, 'everything is different. I was really depressed. My boyfriend broke up with me and it's been so hard but I'm finally understanding that I'm not my thoughts.' That concept is huge-the non-identifying with the negative thoughts and having a little more space and freedom in the midst of it."

Stress reduction and self-acceptance are two of the major perks of mindfulness, benefits Winston says are particularly important during the drama and turmoil-filled teen years. "Emotional regulation, learning how to quiet one's mind-those are invaluable skills."

Randye Semple, PhD, an assistant professor at the University of Southern California's Keck School of Medicine, has spent her career developing programs to teach anxious kids how to quiet their minds. "When I look at childhood anxiety I see an enormous problem and a precursor to other problems in adolescents and adults," she says. "So I figured if we could manage the anxiety we could head off a lot of the other problems." Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy for Anxious Children, the book she co-authored, is based on the program she developed. A study she and her co-author, clinical psychologist Jennifer Lee, conducted from 2000-2003 showed significant reductions in both anxiety and behavior problems in 8- to 12-year-olds in Harlem and Spanish Harlem who participated in the program.

Teaching mindfulness to children and adolescents is a growing trend-in private practices as part of therapy and increasingly as part of the curriculum in both Special Ed and General Ed classes throughout the country. "We're at the beginning of a movement," says Megan Cowan, co-founder and executive director of programs at Mindful Schools in Oakland, California. "Jon Kabat-Zinn's work really set the stage for mindfulness to be visible on a mainstream landscape. I think we all have the sense that society's a little out of control. Education is a little out of control. We're all looking for a way to change that. This is meaningful to almost everybody."

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The Power of Mindfulness - Child Mind Institute

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Learn how mindfulness techniques can help combat stress and alleviate mental health and learning disorders. Child Mind Institute explains the benefits of mindfulness for children.

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Thought Bubbles! Mindfulness for Children. (thought awareness)

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How to Practice Self-Care During the Coronavirus Pandemic

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STRESSED? Learn to reframe stressful situations with this short meditation

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STRESSED? Learn to reframe stressful situations with this short meditation

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STRESSED? Learn to reframe stressful situations with this short meditation.

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4-7-8 Breathing exercise  for sleeping  - Sky Like Mind ~ Louise Shanagher

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A How-to Meditation Guide for Beginners

I don't often bring up meditation in a conversation for fear of sounding like a seventies hippie. But truly, I credit meditation for saving my health, sanity, and making every day that much better.
Follow my blog with Bloglovin
When I had my second child, I was an overwhelmed, chronically stressed mom.

As a result, I began having lots of stomach pain. I originally thought it was what I ate. But changing my diet didn't work. Medication didn't either.

And eventually, I realized it was a result of how emotionally taxed I felt. I was in pain often and realized I HAD to take better care of myself, or I was going to wind up in the hospital. So, as I ran through my options. I researched how to meditate for beginners. Then, I committed.

And years later, I've never looked back. It centers me in a way nothing else can. I couldn't live without it.

Why Meditation Can Change Your Life

The Science of meditation is mounting, and it's no longer a hippie thing. Just ask Oprah Winfrey and Ellen Degeneres. In a world of chronic stress and anxiety, this can be your anchor.

First, meditation lowers your cortisol levels, therefore lowering your stress and blood pressure. A recent study also found that it can increase the size of your hippocampus, which regulates learning and memory.

Thereby making you more productive with less stress. And who doesn't want that?

Now, let's check out how to meditate for beginners...

Basic Meditation

First, basic meditation is very simple. The steps are outlined below, but read on for more resources and tips for success!

Simply find a soft spot to sit.

Set a timer. 5-10-15-20 minutes

Sit up straight, and start with a few deep breaths.

Then count your breathing. In and out.

Scan down your body if you'd like, but the main objective is to focus on your breaths whether in your nose or abdomen. When you notice your breathing stray (it will MANY times) gently bring yourself back to the breath. Continue until the timer goes off.

Or check out this basic 5-minute meditation for a more guided (free) example!

Essential Apps To Try

Now, as a beginner, I highly recommend trying a guided meditation app. I'm not sure I would have stuck with it for the long term without a gentle voice helping me find my way.

Headspace

The Headspace App is my first love, and the savior of my sanity. Plus, the British voice is to die for! I spent a full year doing just the stress meditation. Over. And over.

In this app, there are meditations for anything you can think of. Sleeping, eating, happiness, anxiety, etc. This one remains my favorite, but mostly because I associate it with lifting me out of a tough mental time.

Calm

The Calm app is a new find for me, based on TONS of raving reviews. It has a multitude of options just like headspace, and I've enjoyed the 7 days of Gratitude series as well as the deep sleep meditation. The kids and I even do the soundscapes before bed. It's been helping them wind down before their bedtime.

*The one downside to this app is that the narrator talks a lot. I would have appreciated that when learning how to meditate as a beginner, but as an intermediate, it's less likable.

Insight Timer (Free)

If you're looking for a hands-off (free) alternative this is a great option. When I meditate on my own, I use the timer on the Insight Timer app. There are meditation videos to explore there as well. At last glance, it boasted 32,000 free meditations to try meditating without paying a dime.

This video has a bit more of my story! Then check out the tips to get the most out of your new practice!

10 Tips to Make Meditation Successful

These tips have all been crucial for developing a practice that has now lasted years. Without them, I'd be lost.

1. Remind Yourself Why You're Doing it

Who does meditation benefit?

Of course, it benefits you, but who else? Your kids benefit from a calmer mom. Your spouse benefits from a less stressed partner. And your employees benefit from a focused boss.

The first thing I do is remind myself of the people I love that benefit from my daily sits.

2. Find a Great Time

I've found that morning meditations work well as long as I'm not doing it after I work. Similarly, night meditation works really well just before bed.

Experiment, and choose a time that works well for you. If you can't devote consistent time, you won't be able to stick to the practice.

3. Start Small

If you're having a hard time committing, start small and work your way up. Start with just 3 minutes and add a minute daily.

Related Post: How to Build Better Habits, From the Expert

4. Begin With a Guided Version

A 7 day (free) trial is how I began, and I believe it's the BEST way to start. It helps tremendously to have a voice telling you what to do when you've never meditated before.

5. Experiment

There are many different types of meditation out there.

Maybe breathing isn't for you, but a body scan works wonders. Or perhaps you benefit from visualizing a healing place or doing a gratitude meditation. Try different things to find what works for you. I like to bounce around to keep it fresh.

6. Don't Be Hard on Yourself

After a few times, you will realize that your mind is like an overactive toddler. And it is very easy to get mad at yourself when your thoughts bounce around.

However, it's crucial to come back without judgment when you wander. It's part of the process.

7. Commit to at Least 10 Days

If you're going to go for it. Commit. You can't expect to get all of the feel-good results if you don't stick to it. Like everything, good things take time.

Do it regularly for a period of time, then decide how you feel about it.

8. Do it Anywhere

Aim for a spot that's quiet, but don't freak out when it's not.

If you're a parent, it's hard to be completely alone. Do what you can with what you have, and get used to meditating in different situations.

9. Find Accountability

New habits are formed more easily when you find a community, do a challenge, or get a buddy to do it with you. Use the power of accountability to get you started on this journey.

10. Notice How you Feel

This is my favorite part! When you're finished, take note of how your body and mind feel. It's almost always much calmer and more relaxed than when you started. Celebrate and enjoy your calm state!

Um, What if I'm Horrible at it?

Spoiler alert. You will stink at first. Meditation can be hard. Or at the very least awkward. ( We do hard things though!)

The good news? There is no doing it wrong. Your mind wanders and you bring it back. The more you practice, the better you get. And even then, you'll have days that your mind will jump. It happens.

Something to Consider With Meditation

One of my biggest lessons from motherhood is that adding self-care is a must for a happy life. And meditation is a biggie.

I can feel the difference in my day without it. Do I want to be a sick, stressed-out mama? Or a calm one? The decision is easy, and it's possible with a little practice.

Give yourself the gift of meditation and you'll never look back.

What are your tips for how to meditate for beginners? Please share if you've tried meditation!

Other self-care articles you may enjoy...

How to Meditate for Beginners (apps + tips)

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How to Meditate for Beginners (Essential Apps + Tips)

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I don't often bring up meditation in a conversation for fear of sounding like a seventies hippie. But truly, I credit meditation for saving my health, sanity, and making every day that much better. Follow my blog with Bloglovin When I had my second child, I was an overwhelmed, chronically stressed mom.

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Being a teen is stressful! Whether it's school, friends, or dating, the teen years are full of difficult changes-both mentally and physically. If you're like many teens, you may have difficulty dealing with stress in effective ways. You aren't alone, and there are things you can do to stay calm, no matter how stressful life becomes. All you need to do is stop, breathe, and be mindful and aware in the present moment.

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Being a teen is stressful! Whether it's school, friends, or dating, the teen years are full of difficult changes-both mentally and physically. If you're like many teens, you may have difficulty dealing with stress in effective ways. You aren't alone, and there are things you can do to stay calm, no matter how stressful life becomes.

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How to be Mindful During a 'Thought Parade'

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How to be Mindful During a 'Thought Parade'

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How to be Mindful During a 'Thought Parade'

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Kelly McGonigal: How to make stress your friend

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Stress. It makes your heart pound, your breathing quicken and your forehead sweat. But while stress has been made into a public health enemy, new research suggests that stress may only be bad for you if you believe that to be the case.

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There's no shortage of mindfulness and meditation apps these days, promising to help you combat anxiety, sleep better, hone your focus, and more. In fact, the Wall Street Journal reports that more than 2,000 new meditation apps launched between 2015 and 2018, and offerings have only increased as a result of higher demand during the pandemic-according to the New York Times, mindfulness apps surged in 2020. We took the overwhelm out of finding the most valuable and easy-to-use meditation apps that are available free and narrowed it down to these four apps.

4 Free Meditation Apps We're Happy We Downloaded

Available for iOS, Android, and web

Entry price: Free

Insight Timer has a huge library of content: over 80,000 free guided meditations from over 10,000 teachers on topics like stress, relationships, healing, sleep, creativity, and more.

Right from the beginning, the app feels like a global community-the world map on the home screen shows a collective of 18 million meditators, and announces, "741k today, 7k now." After you finish a meditation, you'll learn exactly how many people were meditating "with you" during that time-and by setting your location, you can even see meditators nearby and what tracks they're listening to.

Once you find a teacher you enjoy-like Jack Kornfield, Tara Brach, Sharon Salzberg, or Rhonda Magee -you can follow them to make sure you don't miss any new content. You can also tune in to free talks for life advice and inspiration. For those craving real-time interactions, Insight Timer offers live events every hour of the day to join on a whim or plan into your schedule.

You can even sign up to Circle for Teams, one of their newer offerings, which allows you to create circles (read: groups) to meditate in real-time with friends or colleagues.

If you prefer a quieter meditation, however, you can simply set a timer and meditate to intermittent bells, calming ambient noise, or soothing music.

Depending on your preferences, Insight Timer's extensive collection can be either a blessing or a curse-an endless list of choices that leave you overwhelmed or a buffet of tempting options to sink your teeth into.

Paid option: For $60 per year (with a 30-day free trial), you get access to courses with well-known teachers, the ability to download meditations and listen offline, and advanced player functions like repeat mode and fast forward and rewind.

Available for iOS, Android, and web

Entry price: Free

Smiling Mind hits the sweet spot for a free mindfulness app in so many ways.

The not-for-profit app features hundreds of meditations, enough to keep you engaged without overwhelming you with choice. They are organized into structured programs like Mindful Foundations (35 sessions), Sleep (6 sessions), Digital Detox (8 sessions), and Stress Management (10 sessions), but you have the flexibility to choose where to start and to easily jump between programs. Most meditations are in the five- to fifteen-minute range, with a few practices up to 45 minutes for advanced meditators. Smiling Mind also offers bite-sized meditations between 2 to 5 minutes for moments when you're in need of a quick, mindful pause in the day.

Downloaded by over 5.5 million people, the app also has a variety of specialized programs for families, children and teens of various ages, healthcare workers, and educators (including curricula they can use in the classroom); all developed with the help of psychologists and health professionals.

While you could use a meditation app as a temporary break from your hectic life, Smiling Mind wants you to take your mindfulness practice off the cushion and into the rest of your day. Interspersed with some of the meditation programs are instructions for "activities" like Journaling Exercise, Go Offline, Where Did My Food Come From, and Count Your Senses. In the Count Your Senses activity, for example, the audio prompts you to bring your attention to your senses by counting things that can be seen, felt, heard, smelled and tasted.

Smiling Mind was originally created for kids, so they offer a robust selection of kid- and youth-appropriate mindfulness sessions.

Created by a nonprofit by the same name, Smiling Mind is entirely free-so you don't have the distraction of paid content that's inaccessible to you as a free user. The app wants to put a "smile on your mind"-and it might just succeed.

Paid option: None

Available for iOS and Android

Entry price: Free

If all the research on mindfulness has persuaded you that you need to meditate, the UCLA Mindful app could be a good place to start.

Developed by the Mindful Awareness Research Center at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA), the app features about a dozen meditations of different types in English and Spanish. You can learn to focus on your breath, your body, or sounds; work with difficult emotions; and cultivate loving-kindness in sessions ranging from 3 to 19 minutes long.

If you're new to mindfulness, you might choose to take advantage of their Getting Started section, which offers information on what mindfulness is, how to choose a meditation, which posture is best for your practice, and what research-backed benefits you might expect from it.

As a bonus, the app also offers longer meditations that it calls "podcasts." These are half-hour audio recordings of meditations that include talks, typically by UCLA Director of Mindfulness Education Diana Winston, before and after the meditation, as well as plenty of silent practice time.

If you're looking for an app that is heavily grounded in the science of mindfulness, you can put your trust in UCLA Mindful.

Paid option: None

Available for iOS and Android

Entry price: Free

The Healthy Minds Program app wants to help you develop the skills for a healthy mind-by strengthening mental focus, decreasing stress, and growing resilience, compassion, and better immune health.

Founded by neuroscientist Dr. Richard Davidson (who also founded the research institute Center for Healthy Minds at the University of Wisconsin-Madison), the app integrates neuroscience and research-based techniques with meditation training to increase overall well-being.

The framework of the app's mindfulness and well-being training is organized into four pillars: Awareness, Connection, Insight, and Purpose. Each pillar consists of three to five parts, and each part contains three series and multiple sessions within. For the Connection pillar, for example, the Innate Self-Worth series includes five sessions packaged to foster self-worth (think sessions like Practice Seeing the Good In Ourselves, and Learn Negativity Bias). You have a choice of either a Sitting or Active type of practice-"active" practices include guidance for being mindful while you exercise, or during your commute-and you can customize the length of time (five minutes to 30 minutes).

The app offers a collection of 27 meditations outside their four-pillar wellness framework, including one-minute Micro Practices for when you're in need of a brief respite.

At times the podcast-style app may encourage more thinking compared to typical guided meditations, but for the listener who is seeking guided meditations with the greater goal to increase awareness, cognition, and well-being, Healthy Minds Program app may be just the ticket.

Paid option: None

When we meditate, we inject far-reaching and long-lasting benefits into our lives: We lower our stress levels, we get to know our pain, we connect better, we improve our focus, and we're kinder to ourselves. Let us walk you through the basics in our new mindful guide on how to meditate. Read More

Practicing gratitude has incredible effects, from improving our mental health to boosting our relationships with others. Explore ways you can be more appreciative in our mindful guide to gratitude. Read More

Mindful writing can lead you on the path of inner discovery. It can be the place where your experience meets your mindfulness practice, a place to encounter the twists and turns of your emotional life-and a bit of solid ground to stand on. Read More

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Free Meditation Apps Worthy of Your Attention

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We scoured the app stores to find the most popular, educational, and easy-to-use free meditation apps available.

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3 Minutes Body Scan Meditation - Mindfulness For Kids And Adults

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The Power of Mindfulness: What You Practice Grows Stronger | Shauna Shapiro | TEDxWashingtonSquare

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For those students wanting additional support, there are some therapists who are offering teletherapy/online therapy for individual counseling sessions as well as group sessions. It is difficult to post a list as many factors come into play when choosing a provider. Please contact me for more information.

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K-4th Grade Counselor
aklothe@potomacschool.org
703-749-6303

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Good sleep is incredibly important.

It helps you feel good and makes your body and brain function properly.

Some people have no problem falling asleep. However, many others have severe difficulty falling and staying asleep through the night.

Poor sleep can have negative effects on many parts of your body and brain, including learning, memory, mood, emotions and various biological functions ().

Here are 20 simple ways to fall asleep as fast as possible.

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If your room is too warm, you might have a hard time falling asleep. Setting your thermostat to a cool temperature between 60-75°F (15-23°C) could help ().

Individual preferences will vary, so find the temperature that works best for you.

The "4-7-8" method is a simple but powerful breathing method that promotes calmness and relaxation. It might also help you unwind before bed.

It consists of a breathing pattern that relaxes the nervous system. It can be practiced anytime you feel anxious or stressed.

Here are the steps:

1. First, place the tip of your tongue behind your upper front teeth.

2. Exhale completely through your mouth and make a whoosh sound.

3. Close your mouth and inhale through your nose while mentally counting to four.

4. Hold your breath and mentally count to seven.

5. Open your mouth and exhale completely, making a whoosh sound and mentally counting to eight.

6. Repeat this cycle at least three more times.

This technique can relax you and help you fall asleep quickly.

Many people find that setting a sleep schedule helps them fall asleep easier.

Your body has its own regulatory system called the circadian rhythm. This internal clock cues your body to feel alert during the day but sleepy at night ().

Waking up and going to bed at the same times each day can help your internal clock keep a regular schedule. Once your body adjusts to this schedule, it will be easier to fall asleep and wake up around the same time every day ().

It is also important to get seven to nine hours of sleep each night. This has been shown to be the optimal sleep duration for adults ().

Lastly, give yourself 30 minutes to an hour to wind down in the evening before getting in bed. This allows your body and mind to relax and prepare for sleep ().

Light can influence your body's internal clock, which regulates sleep and wakefulness.

Irregular light exposure can lead to disruption of circadian rhythms, making it harder to fall asleep and stay awake ().

Get out and expose your body to sunlight or artificial bright light throughout the day. If possible, use blackout curtains to make your room dark at night.

Shop for blackout curtains online.

When people are stressed, they tend to have difficulty falling asleep ().

Yoga, meditation and mindfulness are tools to calm the mind and relax the body. Moreover, they have been shown to improve sleep (, , ).

Yoga encourages the practice of breathing patterns and body movements that release stress and tension accumulated in your body ().

Meditation can enhance melatonin levels and assist the brain in achieving a specific state where sleep is easily achieved ().

Lastly, mindfulness may help you maintain focus on the present and worry less while falling asleep ().

Practicing one or all of these techniques can help you get a good night's rest and wake up reenergized.

It is normal to wake up in the middle of the night. However, the inability to fall back asleep can ruin a good night's rest ().

People who wake up in the middle of the night often tend to watch the clock and obsess about the fact that they cannot fall back asleep.

"Clock-watching" is common among people suffering from insomnia. This behavior may cause anxiety about sleeplessness ().

To make matters worse, waking on a regular basis without falling back asleep may cause your body to develop a routine. As a result, you might find yourself waking up in the middle of the night every night.

If possible, it is best to remove the clock from your room. If you need an alarm in the room, you can turn your clock and avoid watching it when you wake up in the middle of the night.

Due to poor sleep at night, people with insomnia tend to be sleepy during the day. This often leads to daytime napping.

While naps of short duration have been linked to improvements in alertness and wellbeing, there are mixed opinions about the effects of napping on nighttime sleep.

One study showed that among 440 college students, those who reported taking three or more naps per week, those who napped more than two hours and those who napped late (between 6 and 9 p.m.) had the poorest nighttime sleep quality ().

Another study found that older adults who napped frequently had lower quality nighttime sleep, more depressive symptoms, more limited physical activity and were more likely to be overweight than those who rarely took a nap ().

Other studies have revealed that naps do not affect nighttime sleep ().

To find out if naps are affecting your sleep, try either eliminating naps altogether or limiting yourself to a short nap (30 minutes or less) early in the day.

It seems that the food you eat before bed may affect your sleep. For example, research has shown that high-carb meals may be detrimental to a good night's rest.

If you still want to eat a high-carb meal for dinner, you should eat it at least four hours before bed, so you have enough time to digest it.

For more details on foods to eat, here are the 9 best foods to help you sleep.

A study of 24 young adults demonstrated that sedative music promoted deeper sleep ().

Buddhist music is a kind of music created from different Buddhist chants and used for meditation. Listening to it may be a great tool for better sleep ().

Another study revealed that 25 participants had a more restful and deeper sleep when they were exposed to soothing music for 45 minutes at bedtime, compared to those not listening to music ().

Physical activity is often considered beneficial to healthy sleep.

Exercise can increase the duration and quality of sleep by boosting the production of serotonin in the brain and decreasing levels of cortisol, the stress hormone ().

However, it is important to maintain a moderate-intensity exercise routine and not overdo it. Excessive training has been linked to poor sleep ().

Therefore, moderate-to-vigorous exercise in the morning could significantly improve the quality and quantity of your sleep.

It has been shown that having a comfortable mattress and bedding can have a remarkable effect on the depth and quality of sleep.

The quality of your pillow is also crucial. It can affect your neck curve, temperature and comfort. A study determined that orthopedic pillows may be better than feather or memory foam pillows ().

Additionally, the use of a weighted blanket could reduce body stress and help improve your sleep ().

Lastly, the fabric of the clothes you wear to bed can affect how well you sleep. It is crucial you choose comfortable clothing made of fabric that help you keep a pleasant temperature throughout the night ().

Browse a selection of weighted blankets online.

Using electronic devices late at night is terrible for sleep.

It is recommended that you disconnect all electronics and put away computers and mobile phones so you can ensure a quiet place, free of distractions. You will be able to fall asleep much faster.

Aromatherapy involves the use of essential oils.

Aromatherapy is commonly used by those who have trouble falling asleep, as it may help with relaxation.

A systematic review of 12 studies revealed that the use of aromatherapy was effective in improving sleep quality ().

An essential oil diffuser could be helpful in infusing your room with relaxing scents that encourage sleep.

Purchase essential oils online.

Some people have difficulty falling asleep because their thoughts keep running in circles. Research has shown that this can produce anxiety and stress, which can generate negative emotions and disturb sleep ( 48).

Research has shown that journaling and focusing on positive thoughts can calm the mind and help you sleep better.

Writing down the positive events that happened during the day can create a state of gratitude and happiness, downgrade stressful events and promote more relaxation at bedtime.

In fact, a study of 41 college students found that journaling resulted in reduced bedtime worry and stress, increased sleep time and improved sleep quality ( 48).

Try practicing this technique by setting aside 15 minutes every night to write about your day. It is important to focus not only on the positive events of the day but also on how you feel at the time.

Caffeine is widely used among people to fight fatigue and stimulate alertness. It can be found in foods and beverages like chocolate, coffee, sodas and energy drinks.

Although the effects of caffeine vary from person to person, it is recommended that you refrain from consuming caffeine at least six hours before bedtime.

Instead, you could drink a soothing tea like chamomile tea, which has been shown to promote sleep and relaxation ().

You can find a list of bedtime teas that help sleep in this article.

Good quality sleep may depend on your body position during the night.

There are three main sleeping positions: back, stomach or side. Traditionally, it was believed that back sleepers had a better quality of sleep.

However, research has shown that this might not be the best position to sleep in, as it could lead to blocked airways, sleep apnea and snoring ().

In fact, a study done on 16 people determined that the participants who reported consistent poor sleep spent more time on their back ().

Although individual preferences play an important role in choosing sleep position, the side position seems to be linked to high-quality sleep ( 54).

Reading could be a good activity to help you wind down before bed. At least for kids, it seems that bedtime reading may promote longer sleep ().

However, it is important to understand the difference between reading from an electronic book and a traditional paper book.

Electronic books emit a kind of light that can reduce melatonin secretion, making it harder for you to fall asleep and causing you to feel tired the next day (, ).

Therefore, it is recommended to read from a physical book in order to relax and improve your sleep.

It is believed that if you go to bed and try to force yourself to fall asleep, your chances of succeeding drop dramatically.

Instead, you can try "paradoxical intention." This technique recommends trying to stay awake instead of forcing yourself to sleep ().

This technique is based on the idea that the stress and anxiety produced by forcing yourself to fall asleep can prevent you from relaxing and snoozing off.

A study showed that people who try this technique paradoxically tend to fall asleep faster ( 59).

Instead of lying in bed worrying and thinking about stressful things, visualize a place that makes you feel happy and calm.

41 participants suffering from insomnia were able to fall asleep faster after they were instructed to use an "imaginary distraction" ().

This technique helped them occupy their mind with good thoughts instead of engaging with worries and concerns during the pre-sleep time.

Picturing and concentrating on an environment that makes you feel peaceful and relaxed can take your mind away from the thoughts that keep you up at night.

Certain supplements can help you fall asleep faster.

They have been shown to encourage sleep either by boosting the production of sleep-promoting hormones or by calming brain activity.

Supplements that can help you fall asleep include:

Magnesium. Magnesium helps activate the neurotransmitters responsible for sleep. Doses of 200-400 mg per day, taken with food, have been shown to improve sleep (, ).

5 HTP (5-hydroxytryptophan). 5-HTP boosts the production of serotonin, which has been linked to the regulation of sleep. Doses of 300-500 mg per day, taken either once daily or in divided doses, seem to be effective in treating insomnia (, ).

Melatonin. Melatonin is a hormone naturally produced by the body, but it can also be taken as a supplement to help regulate your sleep. Doses of 0.5-5 mg taken 30 minutes before bed seem to improve sleep quality ().

Theanine. Theanine is an amino acid with sedative properties. Although it has not been shown to induce sleep, it could help with relaxation. Doses of 200 mg per day seem to be useful ().

GABA (gamma-aminobutyric acid). GABA is a compound produced in the brain that inhibits certain transmitters and may help the central nervous system relax. Doses of 250-500 mg and no more than 1,000 mg are recommended ().

Shop for magnesium, melatonin, and GABA online.

For more information about effective supplements, here are 9 natural sleep aids that are backed by science.

Having trouble falling and staying asleep is not only frustrating, but it can also affect your mental and physical health.

Using the techniques above can help you fall asleep quickly, while sleeping much better and having more energy the next day.

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20 Simple Ways to Fall Asleep as Fast as Possible

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Good sleep is incredibly important. It helps you feel good and makes your body and brain function properly. Some people have no problem falling asleep. However, many others have severe difficulty falling and staying asleep through the night. Poor sleep can have negative effects on many parts of your body and brain, including learning, memory, mood, emotions and various biological functions ().

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Mental health is an important issue that can go unnoticed in tweens and teens. If your child is in crisis, it's important to seek professional help. In this digital age, phones also provide a supplemental resource for teens to get help. Besides general health apps, there are several apps that focus on mental health. Here are five apps that help teens with mental health (along with professional help) by helping them cope with anxiety, depression, and other mental illnesses.

Calm

Named Apple's 2017 App of the Year, Calm helps users with mindfulness and meditation. The app aims to bring more clarity, joy and peace to your daily life. The app includes guided meditations, Sleep Stories, breathing programs and relaxing music. Calm also has a "Calm Kids" section in the app where younger kids can learn calming techniques.

Pacifica

Pacifica helps teens break the cycle of ongoing negative thoughts. It does this by using tools that target stress, anxiety, and depression. The app consists of psychologist-designed tools based on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, mindfulness meditation, relaxation and mood/health tracking. Pacifica also has a paid option that allows users to work with a mental health professional through the app.

Calm Harm

provides tasks to help users resist or manage the urge to self-harm. The app contains five categories to help you fight the urge to self-harm. Each category includes five to 15 minute activities. These activities turn users' attention to healthier ways to handle emotions and impulses.

My3 - Support Network

My3 is a crisis support app for people who have suicidal thoughts. The app features a contact list to call in case of emergencies. The list includes three of the user's trusted contacts, 911 and the National Suicide Hotline. My3 also includes a safety plan which lists coping strategies and distractions. It's one of the best apps that help teens with mental health struggles that include suicidal ideation.

MoodPath: Depression & Anxiety

helps teens to detect symptoms of depression. Three times a day, users receive a question about their emotional well-being. After two weeks, users will receive a professional assessment. They can then share that assessment with their healthcare professional.

If you believe your child is suffering from a mental illness, please seek out professional help for them immediately. These apps are meant to be used as a supplement with professional help and not as a substitute.

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5 Apps That Help Teens With Mental Health | LearnSafe

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Mental health is an important issue that can go unnoticed in tweens and teens. If your child is in crisis, it's important to seek professional help. In this digital age, phones also provide a supplemental resource for teens to get help. Besides general health apps, there are several apps that focus on mental health.

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A Guide to Self Care while Social Distancing

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What to Say to Someone Struggling With Anxiety

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Depression affects everyone differently. Whether you're dealing with deep depression, loneliness, grief, or extreme stress that's affecting your health, it's important to have easy access to help when you need it.

For some people, that means therapy, medication, or a combination of both. For others, a mobile app may provide a valuable separate or complementary option for tackling depressive symptoms.

The perks? No insurance, traveling, or appointments necessary. Discretion and convenience are key. If you're interested in exploring new ways to manage your mental health, check out our picks for the best depression apps of 2019.

Android: 4.2 stars

Price: Free

This self-help app is based on the tenets of cognitive behavioral therapy. Through informational articles, diarylike mood tracking, and built-in motivational features, the app will help you modify your thought patterns for a better mood. A depression severity test allows you to evaluate your progress. Audio content is a game changer for stressful morning commutes.

Android: 4.4 stars

Price: Free with in-app purchases

What's Up? is more than just a diary and habit tracker. Drawing from CBT and acceptance commitment therapy, it helps teach you dozens of coping mechanisms, from grounding exercises and breathing techniques to ways of recognizing distorted thought patterns, such as catastrophizing and black-and-white thinking. The app's forum also gives you a place to connect when you're needing some extra support.

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Depression affects everyone differently. Whether you're dealing with deep depression, loneliness, grief, or extreme stress that's affecting your health, it's important to have easy access to help when you need it. For some people, that means therapy, medication, or a combination of both.

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Guide to what I can and cannot control during these times

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Guide to what I can and cannot control during these times

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Routine. Ugh, right? Nobody ever said: "So excited to be shocked awake by a relentless shrill signal, force down some oat sludge, and stare at a screen every day for the rest of my life."

But not so fast. In recent years, there's been a quiet swelling of interest in what Sir Arthur Conan Doyle once called "the dull routine of existence." Researchers have found that routine can have far-reaching psychological benefits, including alleviating bipolar disorder , , and . Here's the lowdown on some other ways a routine might benefit you.

Routine to alleviate anxiety and stress
Dr. Steve Orma , a CBT clinical psychologist who specializes in treating insomnia, anxiety, and stress, tells me that routine is a big part of the work he does in all these areas.

" To manage anxiety," he says, "you need to consistently check in with yourself about what you're worrying about, then address it. Just as we create routines with exercise for our physical bodies, we should do the same for our mental health. One way to do this is scheduling 'thinking time' to think through any problems or worries weighing on you instead of letting them build up." This is one reason that daily journaling can be helpful for those who struggle with anxiety.

Orma adds: "Routine also helps with stress ... Create a set schedule for doing chores, work tasks, meetings, exercise, paying bills, and all the usual things you need to do. Put these into your schedule. Once this becomes your normal routine, it's easier to accomplish everything, because it becomes habit. " As a paperwork-phobe, I identify strongly with this: since I started setting aside 20 minutes a day to keep on top of life admin, instead of letting it grow into a mountain I die on every few months, I sleep better and enjoy each day more.

Having a routine helps ensure you do things well.

Career coach and writer Marty Nemko points out another soothing effect: a routine is " something you know you can do well ," he tells me, which can be comforting during tough times: " Modern life, increasingly defined by unpredictability, can be anxiety-provoking, and routines provide an anchor of predictability. "

Routine for creativity and productivity

Look at the lives of famously gifted and creative people-including Freud, Beethoven, and Georgia O'Keeffe, to name but a few -and you'll see that many of them optimized their daily lives to get on top of their games. Routine was their secret weapon. Here's internationally bestselling author Haruki Murakami talking to The Paris Review :

"When I'm in writing mode for a novel, I get up at 4 a.m. and work for five to six hours. In the afternoon, I run for 10 kilometers or swim for 1,500 meters (or do both), then I read a bit and listen to some music. I go to bed at 9 p.m. I keep to this routine every day without variation. The repetition itself becomes the important thing; it's a form of mesmerism. I mesmerize myself to reach a deeper state of mind."

This is an intense example-maybe even a bit frightening, depending on how you feel about swimming. But you don't have to wake up at 4 a.m. to reap these rewards. The key benefit of routine for creative people is its regularity: if you find what works for you and then turn it into a process that requires zero thought, you free your mind for more important things.

Making time for what matters to you

Here's another crucial bonus: routines allow you to carve out time to pursue your passion every single day. Once it's a routine, there's no more wriggling out of painting or writing or working on your business plan because you're too tired or the muse eludes you.

Daily practice is a game-changer for creativity. Among other things, it keeps projects constantly percolating in the unconscious mind-and research shows just how powerful the unconscious mind is, helping us to reach better decisions than active thought.

As Marty Nemko told me: " Having a routine helps ensure you do things well. For example, if your routine includes a daily shower, you'll continually get better at it ." Sure, it's harder to perfect your prose style than the way you wash your hair, but the same logic applies: daily practice is where the magic happens.

And if one of the things you happen to incorporate into your daily routine is a meditation practice, you'll amplify all of the benefits mentioned here, since meditation boosts creativity and productivity while alleviating and .

How to create a great routine

Dr. Orma has some advice: " Sit down with a pad of paper and write out everything you do each day over the course of a week. See what you can cut or reduce. Then see what you can set as a normal routine, something you do at a set time each day or week. It has to work with your lifestyle. If you like to stay up late, getting up early as part of your routine may not work."

Once you have your routine, give it a little time and it'll start to feel like second nature-but if you realize something isn't working, don't be afraid to change it. Sports psychologist Dr. Jim Taylor , an expert on the power of routine for athletes in training, tells me: " It can be worthwhile to alter routines periodically to keep things fresh and stimulating. " This is another secret bonus of routines: once you've established one, the merest of tweaks can totally revitalize your day.

The author of this post is an editorial contributor to Headspace. These are their views, experiences and results and theirs alone. This contributor was paid for their writing.

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The secret benefit of routines. It won't surprise you.

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Routine. Ugh, right? Nobody ever said: "So excited to be shocked awake by a relentless shrill signal, force down some oat sludge, and stare at a screen every day for the rest of my life." But not so fast.

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Anyone can experience mental health problems. Friends and family can make all the difference in a person's recovery process.

Supporting a Friend or Family Member with Mental Health Problems

You can help your friend or family member by recognizing the signs of mental health problems and connecting them to professional help.

Talking to friends and family about mental health problems can be an opportunity to provide information, support, and guidance. Learning about mental health issues can lead to:

Improved recognition of early signs of mental health problems

Earlier treatment

Greater understanding and compassion

If a friend or family member is showing signs of a mental health problem or reaching out to you for help, offer support by:

Finding out if the person is getting the care that he or she needs and wants-if not, connect him or her to help

Expressing your concern and support

Reminding your friend or family member that help is available and that mental health problems can be treated

Asking questions, listening to ideas, and being responsive when the topic of mental health problems come up

Reassuring your friend or family member that you care about him or her

Offering to help your friend or family member with everyday tasks

Including your friend or family member in your plans-continue to invite him or her without being overbearing, even if your friend or family member resists your invitations

Educating other people so they understand the facts about mental health problems and do not discriminate

Treating people with mental health problems with respect, compassion, and empathy

How to Talk About Mental Health

Do you need help starting a conversation about mental health? Try leading with these questions and make sure to actively listen to your friend or family member's response.

I've been worried about you. Can we talk about what you are experiencing? If not, who are you comfortable talking to?

What can I do to help you to talk about issues with your parents or someone else who is responsible and cares about you?

What else can I help you with?

I am someone who cares and wants to listen. What do you want me to know about how you are feeling?

Who or what has helped you deal with similar issues in the past?

Sometimes talking to someone who has dealt with a similar experience helps. Do you know of others who have experienced these types of problems who you can talk with?

It seems like you are going through a difficult time. How can I help you to find help?

How can I help you find more information about mental health problems?

I'm concerned about your safety. Have you thought about harming yourself or others?

When talking about mental health problems:

Know how to connect people to help

Communicate in a straightforward manner

Speak at a level appropriate to a person's age and development level (preschool children need fewer details as compared to teenagers)

Discuss the topic when and where the person feels safe and comfortable

Watch for reactions during the discussion and slow down or back up if the person becomes confused or looks upset

Sometimes it is helpful to make a comparison to a physical illness. For example, many people get sick with a cold or the flu, but only a few get really sick with something serious like pneumonia. People who have a cold are usually able to do their normal activities. However, if they get pneumonia, they will have to take medicine and may have to go to the hospital.

Similarly, feelings of sadness, anxiety, worry, irritability, or sleep problems are common for most people. However, when these feelings get very intense, last for a long period of time, and begin to interfere with school, work, and relationships, it may be a sign of a mental health problem. And just like people need to take medicine and get professional help for physical conditions, someone with a mental health problem may need to take medicine and/or participate in therapy in order to get better.

Get Help for Your Friend or Family Member

Seek immediate assistance if you think your friend or family member is in danger of harming themselves. You can call a crisis line or the National Suicide Prevention Line at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

If you think your friend or family member is in need of community mental health services you can find help in your area.

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Anyone can experience mental health problems. Friends and family can make all the difference in a person's recovery process. You can help your friend or family member by recognizing the signs of mental health problems and connecting them to professional help.

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Nine Simple Interventions for Depression

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Nine Simple Interventions for Depression

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Given the way our lives have been turned upside down by the pandemic-causing isolation, joblessness, fear, anxiety-a lot of our clients will exhibit signs of depression, especially those with a history of depressive disorders. Even we therapists may feel the weight of our own challenges as well as the pain of our clients. Here are some simple Sensorimotor Psychotherapy interventions that can help those who are feeling depressed and alone-and that are easily worked into a video session.

Lengthen the Spine
One of my very favorite interventions for depression is deceptively simple-lengthening the spine. With depression, with that heaviness, even with just the words, I'm depressed, the spine tends to collapse. Try it yourself even before you try it with your clients and notice that when you say those words-"I'm depressed"-your body reacts, even if don't currently feel that way. Because depression is such a physical experience and is often accompanied by more effortful speech, somatic techniques can be very helpful.

So if you hear clients say the word hopeless or you see the collapse in their chests on screen, you can invite them to "Notice what happens if you just lengthen your spine a little bit from the lower back up." I always add, "Don't sit up straight the way your mother might have told you-just lengthen your spine from the lower back up."

Usually, this is not difficult for people to do, and it's interesting how effective something so small can be in the moment. We need interventions for depression that don't require much effort, because the depressed client won't have the energy.

Orienting
Another thing that can help depressed and anxious clients is orienting. Dogs do it all the time: when they start sniffing around a new space or person, they're orienting to the environment through the sense of smell. Humans orient visually. Or those who are visually impaired often orient auditorily. But when we look around and notice where we are, it usually regulates autonomic arousal and brings our nervous systems up into window of tolerance.

A very important tip from Sensorimotor Psychotherapy: demonstrate to the client how to orient, making sure to turn your head and neck 180 degrees to model taking in the whole space. Words alone are harder to process, especially for depressed clients whose nervous systems keep them slow and shut down.

I frame this intervention by asking clients to "Just look very, very carefully around the whole room and tell me the one thing you like the least in this room." And that invitation wakes them up. They brighten up and ask, "Is it really okay to tell you what I don't like?" Then, after they've found one thing they don't like in the room, I might say, "Good. Now could you look around again very carefully and find the two things that you dislike the most?" Because I'd created novelty, suddenly their nervous system begin to have more energy, counteracting some of the heaviness and slowness.

Verbal Experiments
Orienting and lengthening the spine represent somatic experiments. I also love to use the Sensorimotor Psychotherapy technique of verbal experiments. Experimenting with words is important because they have such a strong impact on body experience.

If, as you're reading this blog, you say to yourself, "This is interesting," you'll notice a slight lift in energy, a smile might come up, your eyes might light up a little bit. If you say to yourself, "This is stupid," you might notice a drop in energy or a slight collapse in your shoulders.

To help clients appreciate the impact of their own words, we can ask them to notice what happens to the depression when they repeat words like, "I'm a hopeless case." Then we can ask, "When you say those words, do you feel better? Or do you feel worse?" Most people say, "I feel worse." That's when we can ask them to notice what happens when they repeat the words, "I'm doing the best I can." It's important to add, "It doesn't matter whether you believe them or not-see what happens when you just say those words." Most clients report, "I feel a little bit better."

Encourage Movement
If you have a very depressed client who is numb and passive and has no energy or interest, don't be afraid to use movement. I say to the client, "You know, I've been sitting all day. Would you mind terribly if we stood up?" Most hypoaroused, depressed clients are automatically compliant, so they'll usually do it, and when they do, they feel slightly better. Movement might seem harder in these days of video conferencing, but we can do it. We can simply stand up in front of our computers.

Talking about COVID-19 generally increases anxiety. For clients who are very anxious right now, standing up and rocking from foot to foot while you mirror their movements can be very soothing and regulating.

Dropping the Content
This is another very simple Sensorimotor Psychotherapy technique for depressed or anxious clients who tend to ruminate on the same negative thoughts day after day, session after session, exacerbating their self-loathing and sense of unworthiness or their fears. After noticing out loud, "There is that thought again that __________," I ask them, "When you have that thought, do you feel better or do you feel worse?" If they reply that they feel worse, then I can suggest, "Could we try something that might help?"

Once they've agreed to try it, I hold out my hand, palm up, and I ask the client, "Imagine someone putting a burning hot potato onto the palm of my hand. . . . What is my hand going to do?" I never ask them to put out their hands, by the way. I put out my hand so they can see and imagine the hot potato dropping into it. Then I make the dropping motion as if I'm trying to get rid of the potato as quickly as possible, and they often do it spontaneously even if their hands are at their sides. Then I instruct them: "Every time you have one of those toxic thoughts, drop it immediately-just like a hot potato."

It's important to then practice this technique in therapy. Whenever I hear clients utter a thought we've framed as toxic, I make the dropping motion to stimulate their making it, and slowly they begin to develop more awareness and control over their negative thoughts.

NOTE: During this time of isolation and crisis, our clients (and we ourselves) will have frequent negative thoughts and predictions. Those are normal to have in this situation but can also add to the stress involved in dealing with the crisis. However, we have to frame COVID-related thoughts differently so we're not suggesting that it's abnormal to feel anxiety and depression in a state of emergency. I might say, "As normal as it is to have those thoughts, they are toxic for you. Let's work on putting them aside because that will support your immune system."

Parts Work
Another option with depression and hopelessness is to frame them as communications from a "depressed part." I ask the client, "Notice what happens if you assume that the depression belongs to just one part of you. . . Does that feel better or worse?" Most people report it feels better.

In the Fragmented Selves model (which integrates Sensorimotor Psychotherapy ideas with Internal Family Systems techniques), depression and anxiety are always reframed as expressions of parts, and we help the client become more curious about these parts. "How old might that depressed part be? Can you ask that part to show you a picture that might explain why she's so depressed? . . ."

When we frame depression or anxiety as a communication from a young wounded child self or from a part trying to warn us of dangers ahead, most clients instinctively have more compassion for themselves and can begin to relate to the depression as a feeling memory.

Remember Change Stimulates "Turbulence"
If the depressive state was once a survival response, if a child's safety was dependent being seen and not heard, it can be very triggering to begin to have that depressive state lift now. So, remember that as the depression remediates, there may be increased anxiety about visibility, and more access to emotions may trigger feelings of overwhelm.

My colleague Deirdre Fay talks about this phenomenon as "turbulence," which normalizes the fear of feeling better. I quote Deirdre to my clients: "Don't worry. When something changes, we experience turbulence. This is just turbulence. This is a lot to get used to. And you will."

Use Your Social Engagement System
When clients are in a parasympathetic depressed state, we therapists have yet another avenue for intervention: our social engagement systems. The social engagement system as described by Stephen Porges is a neural system that controls the facial muscles, the movements of the eyes and eyelids, the larynx for voice, the middle ear for listening, and the tilting and turning movements of the head and neck. Even over video, you can make use of your eyes, facial expressions, voice, and movements. You can soften your gaze and put a little sparkle in your eyes. You can also play with your vocal tone and pace of speech.

The more energy you can bring to the screen, the more the client is going to feel it. Play with what seems to get the client more engaged, more present, more relaxed, or elicits a little lift in mood.

Playfulness
I'm going to end with therapist Dan Hughes' words, which are even more important in these days: "The primary therapeutic attitude that we need to bring is that of playfulness, acceptance, curiosity, and empathy."

Therapists are really good at empathy and acceptance. But we forget to be playful. Playfulness is something people need now. And people with depressive disorders need it even more.

Hughes says, "Playful interactions focused on positive affective experiences are never forgotten, and all communication is embodied within the nonverbal," meaning you don't say something if your body and your facial expression do not back it up.

It might seem counterintuitive, but think about what could happen if you imagine helping clients have fun with their depression.

***
Janina Fisher, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychologist and instructor at the Trauma Center in Boston, a senior faculty member of the Sensorimotor Psychotherapy Institute, and a former instructor at Harvard Medical School.
Illustration © iStock/Nuthawut Somsuk

Topic: Anxiety/Depression

Tags: body | clinical depression | coping with depression | Cultural, Social & Racial Issues | cures for depression | curing depression | dealing with depression | Depression & Grief | depression and anxiety | disease | Illness | Illnesses | inner parts | Janina Fisher | movement | sensorimotor psychotherapy | sensorimotor therapy | Trauma | trauma and recovery

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Nine Simple Interventions for Depression

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By Janina Fisher - Given the way our lives have been turned upside down by the pandemic, a lot of our clients will exhibit signs of depression. Here are some simple Sensorimotor Psychotherapy interventions that can help those who are feeling depressed and alone-and that are easily worked into a video session.

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Executive Summary

During the global pandemic, a palpable sense of collective grief has emerged. Grief expert David Kessler says that grief is actually multiple feelings that we must manage. In an interview with HBR, he explains how the classic five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, acceptance) apply today, and the practical steps we can take to manage the anxiety. Those include balancing bad thoughts with good; focusing on the present; letting go of things you can't control; and stocking up on compassion. Kessler also talks about a sixth stage of grief: meaning. After acceptance, he says, we will find meaning in the hard-to-fathom events and we will be stronger for it.

HBR Staff/d3sign/Getty Images

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Some of the HBR edit staff met virtually the other day - a screen full of faces in a scene becoming more common everywhere. We talked about the content we're commissioning in this harrowing time of a pandemic and how we can help people. But we also talked about how we were feeling. One colleague mentioned that what she felt was grief. Heads nodded in all the panes.

If we can name it, perhaps we can manage it. We turned to David Kessler for ideas on how to do that. Kessler is the world's foremost expert on grief. He co-wrote with Elisabeth Kübler-Ross On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief through the Five Stages of Loss. His new book adds another stage to the process, Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. Kessler also has worked for a decade in a three-hospital system in Los Angeles. He served on their biohazards team. His volunteer work includes being an LAPD Specialist Reserve for traumatic events as well as having served on the Red Cross's disaster services team. He is the founder of www.grief.com, which has over 5 million visits yearly from 167 countries.

Kessler shared his thoughts on why it's important to acknowledge the grief you may be feeling, how to manage it, and how he believes we will find meaning in it. The conversation is lightly edited for clarity.
HBR: People are feeling any number of things right now. Is it right to call some of what they're feeling grief?
Kessler: Yes, and we're feeling a number of different griefs. We feel the world has changed, and it has. We know this is temporary, but it doesn't feel that way, and we realize things will be different. Just as going to the airport is forever different from how it was before 9/11, things will change and this is the point at which they changed. The loss of normalcy; the fear of economic toll; the loss of connection. This is hitting us and we're grieving. Collectively. We are not used to this kind of collective grief in the air.
You said we're feeling more than one kind of grief?
Yes, we're also feeling anticipatory grief. Anticipatory grief is that feeling we get about what the future holds when we're uncertain. Usually it centers on death. We feel it when someone gets a dire diagnosis or when we have the normal thought that we'll lose a parent someday. Anticipatory grief is also more broadly imagined futures. There is a storm coming. There's something bad out there. With a virus, this kind of grief is so confusing for people. Our primitive mind knows something bad is happening, but you can't see it. This breaks our sense of safety. We're feeling that loss of safety. I don't think we've collectively lost our sense of general safety like this. Individually or as smaller groups, people have felt this. But all together, this is new. We are grieving on a micro and a macro level.
What can individuals do to manage all this grief?
Understanding the stages of grief is a start. But whenever I talk about the stages of grief, I have to remind people that the stages aren't linear and may not happen in this order. It's not a map but it provides some scaffolding for this unknown world. There's denial, which we say a lot of early on: This virus won't affect us. There's anger: You're making me stay home and taking away my activities. There's bargaining: Okay, if I social distance for two weeks everything will be better, right? There's sadness: I don't know when this will end. And finally there's acceptance. This is happening; I have to figure out how to proceed.

Acceptance, as you might imagine, is where the power lies. We find control in acceptance. I can wash my hands. I can keep a safe distance. I can learn how to work virtually.
When we're feeling grief there's that physical pain. And the racing mind. Are there techniques to deal with that to make it less intense?
Let's go back to anticipatory grief. Unhealthy anticipatory grief is really anxiety, and that's the feeling you're talking about. Our mind begins to show us images. My parents getting sick. We see the worst scenarios. That's our minds being protective. Our goal is not to ignore those images or to try to make them go away - your mind won't let you do that and it can be painful to try and force it. The goal is to find balance in the things you're thinking. If you feel the worst image taking shape, make yourself think of the best image. We all get a little sick and the world continues. Not everyone I love dies. Maybe no one does because we're all taking the right steps. Neither scenario should be ignored but neither should dominate either.

Anticipatory grief is the mind going to the future and imagining the worst. To calm yourself, you want to come into the present. This will be familiar advice to anyone who has meditated or practiced mindfulness but people are always surprised at how prosaic this can be. You can name five things in the room. There's a computer, a chair, a picture of the dog, an old rug, and a coffee mug. It's that simple. Breathe. Realize that in the present moment, nothing you've anticipated has happened. In this moment, you're okay. You have food. You are not sick. Use your senses and think about what they feel. The desk is hard. The blanket is soft. I can feel the breath coming into my nose. This really will work to dampen some of that pain.

You can also think about how to let go of what you can't control. What your neighbor is doing is out of your control. What is in your control is staying six feet away from them and washing your hands. Focus on that.

Finally, it's a good time to stock up on compassion. Everyone will have different levels of fear and grief and it manifests in different ways. A coworker got very snippy with me the other day and I thought, That's not like this person; that's how they're dealing with this. I'm seeing their fear and anxiety. So be patient. Think about who someone usually is and not who they seem to be in this moment.
One particularly troubling aspect of this pandemic is the open-endedness of it.
This is a temporary state. It helps to say it. I worked for 10 years in the hospital system. I've been trained for situations like this. I've also studied the 1918 flu pandemic. The precautions we're taking are the right ones. History tells us that. This is survivable. We will survive. This is a time to overprotect but not overreact.

And, I believe we will find meaning in it. I've been honored that Elisabeth Kübler-Ross's family has given me permission to add a sixth stage to grief: Meaning. I had talked to Elisabeth quite a bit about what came after acceptance. I did not want to stop at acceptance when I experienced some personal grief. I wanted meaning in those darkest hours. And I do believe we find light in those times. Even now people are realizing they can connect through technology. They are not as remote as they thought. They are realizing they can use their phones for long conversations. They're appreciating walks. I believe we will continue to find meaning now and when this is over.
What do you say to someone who's read all this and is still feeling overwhelmed with grief?
Keep trying. There is something powerful about naming this as grief. It helps us feel what's inside of us. So many have told me in the past week, "I'm telling my coworkers I'm having a hard time," or "I cried last night." When you name it, you feel it and it moves through you. Emotions need motion. It's important we acknowledge what we go through. One unfortunate byproduct of the self-help movement is we're the first generation to have feelings about our feelings. We tell ourselves things like, I feel sad, but I shouldn't feel that; other people have it worse. We can - we should - stop at the first feeling. I feel sad. Let me go for five minutes to feel sad. Your work is to feel your sadness and fear and anger whether or not someone else is feeling something. Fighting it doesn't help because your body is producing the feeling. If we allow the feelings to happen, they'll happen in an orderly way, and it empowers us. Then we're not victims.
In an orderly way?
Yes. Sometimes we try not to feel what we're feeling because we have this image of a "gang of feelings." If I feel sad and let that in, it'll never go away. The gang of bad feelings will overrun me. The truth is a feeling that moves through us. We feel it and it goes and then we go to the next feeling. There's no gang out to get us. It's absurd to think we shouldn't feel grief right now. Let yourself feel the grief and keep going.

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Executive Summary During the global pandemic, a palpable sense of collective grief has emerged. Grief expert David Kessler says that grief is actually multiple feelings that we must manage. In an interview with HBR, he explains how the classic five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, acceptance) apply today, and the practical steps we can take to manage the anxiety.

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https://www.mentalhealth.gov/

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Meet Toni, a volunteer at Camp Forget-Me-Not
Help children heal from the worst moments of their lives
Toni's young cousin experienced the loss of her grandfather, grandmother, and mother. Her school counselor recommended Camp Forget-Me-Not.

" As parents, we always want to jump in and save the day, but we're not always equipped. Here at Camp Forget-Me-Not, she was able to expore her emotions and really realize that she was grieving. It was such a great experience for her that I wanted to give back myself."

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Wendt Center for Loss & Healing | Grief & Trauma Therapy

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We restore hope and healing to children and adults coping with grief, loss, violence and trauma, helping rebuild their emotional strength.

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The Trevor Project | For Young LGBTQ Lives

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The Trevor Project provides 24/7 crisis support services to LGBTQ young people. Text, chat, or call anytime to reach a trained counselor. Free and confidential.

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Born This Way Foundation is committed to supporting the wellness of young people, and empowering them to create a kinder and braver world.

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“I have ADHD…..so what?” In many ways, so what is right. Mostly, you are just a regular teen, with all the ups and downs that come with being a teenager. In other ways, growing up and heading towards adulthood with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder may present some unique challenges. People…

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SMYAL meets the needs of LGBTQ youth in the Washington D.C. metropolitan area, building advocacy skills and access to crucial resources.

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NIMH offers brochures and fact sheets on mental health disorders and related topics for patients and their families, health professionals, and the public. Printed materials can be ordered free of charge. Brochures and fact sheets are also offered in digital formats and are available in English and Spanish.

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NIMH offers brochures and fact sheets on mental health disorders and related topics for patients and their families, health professionals, and the public. Printed materials can be ordered free of charge. Brochures and fact sheets are also offered in digital formats and are available in English and Spanish.

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Being healthy means dealing with the changes in your body - and your mind. Relationships, body image, families, emotions ... sort it all out in this section.

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Hi. Glad you made it here. Chances are, you know someone who died. It might have been your mother or father. Your sister or brother. Your friend. It may have happened a long time ago or just recently. What has it been like for you?

Randy, a sophomore in high school, was 14 when his dad died of colon cancer. This is how he describes the experience of grieving the death of his dad:

"It's been six months since my dad died. I haven't told my friends how I feel. I just smile and make everybody laugh so they don't know how much it hurts. I don't talk to my mom because I don't want her to feel worse. Once I did, but she got all teary. I felt like crying too. No way am I going to cry."

Maybe you can relate to Randy. Or maybe you've felt some of these things:

I'm the only one.
No one understands what I'm going through, but they think they do.
I can't talk to my friends about this.
I can't talk to my parent(s) because they get too upset.
Everyone wants me to talk about my feelings and I don't want to talk.
I just want to be alone.
I wish I didn't feel so different.
When is this "grief" going to go away?
I am mad. I am sad. I hurt.
I don't know what I feel.
I hate it when people tell me, "Move on."

Sometimes it helps to talk to other people your own age who've had a death. Or to read about their experiences. There are no right or wrong ways to grieve a death. But there are some helpful and not-so-helpful ways that people grieve. You can learn about these things here.

Everyone grieves differently:
* One teen may want to talk about death
* Another may choose to cry
* One might write about their experiences in a journal or chat room
* Some choose to express their grief in creative/artistic ways
* Others are physical in their grief - participating in sports or other big energy activities
* No one way is the right way to grieve - your way of grieving is right for you

For more thoughts on grieving for teens, by teens, click here.

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Hi. Glad you made it here. Chances are, you know someone who died. It might have been your mother or father. Your sister or brother. Your friend. It may have happened a long time ago or just recently. What has it been like for you?

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Warning Signs of Suicide

Everyone feels sad, depressed, stressed, or angry sometimes - especially when dealing with the pressures of school, friends, and family. But some people may feel sadness or hopelessness that won't go away, along with thoughts of suicide.

You may have heard that people who talk about suicide won't actually go through with it. That's not true. People who talk about suicide may be likely to try it.

Immediate warning signs that someone may be thinking of suicide include:

talking about suicide or death in general

looking online for ways to kill oneself or buying items to use in a suicide attempt

talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live

engaging in self-destructive behavior (drinking a lot of alcohol, takingdrugs, driving too fast, or cutting, for example)

visiting or calling people to say goodbye

giving away possessions

What Can I Do?

Ask

If you have a friend who's talking about suicide or showing other warning signs, don't wait to see if they start to feel better. Talk about it. Ask them directly if they're having thoughts of suicide. Having someone care enough to ask these questions can help save your friend's life.

Some people (both teens and adults) are reluctant to ask teens if they've been thinking about suicide or hurting themselves. They might worry that, by asking, they're planting the idea of suicide. Research has proven this to be 100% untrue. If you're worried - ask.

Asking someone if they're having thoughts about suicide can be hard. It can help to let your friend know why you're asking. For instance, you might say, "I've noticed that you've been talking a lot about wanting to be dead. Have you been having thoughts about trying to kill yourself?" Be prepared for their answer and be ready to talk to a trusted adult at home or at school to get the help needed.

Tell

If your friend asks you to keep these thoughts a secret, let them know you care about them and need to share this with a trusted adult. It may feel like you're betraying your friend, but you should always tell a trusted adult.

Share your concerns with an adult as soon as possible. You also can turn to these resources for 24/7 help:

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or text CONNECT to 741741

Trevor Lifeline for LGBTQ community: 1-866-488-7386 or text START to 678678

The important thing is to notify a responsible adult. It may be tempting to try to help your friend on your own, but it's always safest to get help.

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My Friend Is Talking About Suicide. What Should I Do?

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Everyone feels sad, depressed, stressed, or angry sometimes - especially when dealing with the pressures of school, friends, and family. But some people may feel sadness or hopelessness that won't go away, along with thoughts of suicide. You may have heard that people who talk about suicide won't actually go through with it.

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Resilience Expert Offers Three Ways to Tap into the Wisdom of the Body

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Resilience Expert Offers Three Ways to Tap into the Wisdom of the Body

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We lose our car keys and our wallet, we discover mold in the bathroom, our dearest friend moves across the country, a family member is diagnosed with COVID-19. How can we practice holding life as it is with conscious awareness, full-hearted acceptance, and grounded equanimity?

Even if I am having a meltdown, am falling apart, am going ballistic or retreating into a collapsed isolation, I can remember that I am a human being, and that all human beings have similar reactions to life's disappointments, difficulties, and even disasters. I can hold myself with compassion and care, finding the courageous action I need to meet the current challenges or crises.

Returning to the wisdom of our bodies can become the foundation for the practice of resilience, a practice to help us deal with all of the issues in our lives.

Many mindfulness practices use the wisdom of our bodies to return us to a state of ease and calm, no matter the cause of disruption to our well-being-allowing us to hold, to accept, and to work with anything at all. Returning to the wisdom of our bodies can become the foundation for the practice of resilience, a practice to help us deal with all of the issues in our lives, including the coronavirus pandemic that is triggering so much anxiety, confusion, and uncertainty.

Connect with Your Body's Wisdom in Moments of Stress

Our first response to any stressor begins in our bodies. Mindfulness helps us become aware of signals of stress or distress, and we can practice tools that will return our nervous systems back to baseline physiological equilibrium. This is how we "train" resilience.

The three types of research-backed practices-breath practices, healing touch practices, and movement practices-help you bring your attention gently into your body, in order to rediscover your equilibrium. Here's a guide to connecting with your body's wisdom throughout these stressful times.

3 Breath Practices to Regulate Your Nervous System

We learn tools of breath first, because we breathe all the time. The breath is always available, as long as we are alive. Breathing IS what regulates the autonomic nervous system. We can learn to very intentionally use this rhythm of breathing in and breathing out (as is done in yoga breathwork, elongating the exhales) to cultivate more calm in the body and access a deeper well-being.

1. Breathe naturally, gently, for five to ten breaths. Mindfully pay attention to the sensations of breathing in (cool air through the nostrils or throat, the gentle expansion of the belly and chest) and breathing out (warmer air flowing out, the relaxation of the belly and chest). Especially as you begin this practice, pause and repeat this practice many times a day. When you are doing "nothing" but breathing and paying attention to your breathing, you are doing "something" helpful in calming your nervous system and training your nervous system to come to calm. You are making a conscious choice: "I GET to regulate my nervous system."

2. The Box Breath Practice. This is a resilience practice taught to firefighters and police officers to use when they experience a moment of "startle." The startle response is hardwired into our nervous system by evolution, so that when our nervous system perceives danger, we automatically blink to protect our eyes; we crouch to protect our innards; we put both hands up to defend or fight. And that startle response is so hardwired in that we can't retrain the brain to not have that happen. Like a sneeze, it's going to happen.

When you are doing "nothing" but breathing and paying attention to your breathing, you are doing "something" helpful in calming your nervous system and training your nervous system to come to calm.

The box breath can help you train your brain for resilience in moments of high alert. You inhale to a count of four, you hold the breath for a count of four, you exhale to a count of four, you hold out the breath for a count of four. The breathing regulates your nervous system, as we just practiced. The counting requires your higher brain to stay on line. The focused attention on the counting, the use of symbols, the use of words, all require your higher brain to stay online, and keeping your higher brain online when you're startled is key to being able to discern and choose what action to take.

So when you notice your nervous system is so revved up-you're frightened or panicked or angry or enraged, you're not thinking straight, use that as your cue to practice box breathing to come back to your safety zone, your range of resilience, so that you can think clearly again. Likewise, if your nervous system is too shut down, numbed out, collapsed, immobilized, not taking any action at all, that's also not resilient. Box breathing activates your brain again. You can begin to re-engage with what's happening and decide what to do about what's happening.

3. A simple, audible sigh. You can extend the practice of using the breath to regulate your nervous system by giving yourself permission to sigh. Breathe in fully, then exhale fully, sometimes accompanied by a sound, ahhh, releasing tension from your body. A deep sigh (or several sighs) is the body's natural re-setter of the nervous system, even in a tense moment; especially in a tense moment. You can practice pairing any moment of tension with a deliberate sigh. In the midst of a tense or frightening moment, a deliberate sigh can shift the physiology of the body-brain into a more relieved and relaxed state.

The Healing Power of Touch

Touch is one of the fastest ways we have to both calm down the re-energize the nervous system and restore a sense of safety, according to Dacher Keltner, founder of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley. Warm, safe touch releases oxytocin, the hormone of safety and trust, of calm and connect. As Keltner notes in his book Born to Be Good, oxytocin is the brain's direct and immediate antidote to the stress hormone cortisol-and oxytocin repairs any damage to the physical heart caused by cortisol.

Even in this time of practicing social isolation as a way to contain the spread of coronavirus, we can add focusing our attention on warm, safe touch to help manage any anxiety or distress we are experiencing.

Even in this time of practicing social isolation as a way to contain the spread of coronavirus, we can add focusing our attention on warm, safe touch to help manage any anxiety or distress we are experiencing, and evoke a memory of feeling safe and cared about to deepen that sense of ease and calm.

Practice: The Hand on the Heart Exercise

This is one of the most powerful tools we have to restore a sense of calm and equilibrium in the body-brain. Anchored in both mindfulness and self-compassion, it is powerful enough to calm down a panic attack in less than a minute. It's powerful enough to prevent the stress response from even happening in the first place.

1. Place your hand on your heart. Breathe gently, softly, and deeply into the area of your heart. If you wish, breathe in a sense of ease or safety or goodness into this heart center.

2. Remember one moment, just one moment when you felt safe, loved, and cherished by another human being. Don't try to recall the entire relationship, just one moment. This could be a partner, a child, a friend, a therapist, or a teacher; it could be a spiritual figure, or a loving moment with a pet.

3. As you remember this moment of feeling safe, loved, and cherished, let yourself experience the feelings of that moment. Let the sensations wash through your body. Let yourself stay with these feelings for twenty to thirty seconds. Notice any deepening in a visceral sense of ease and safety.

4. Repeat this practice many times a day at first to strengthen the neural circuitry that remembers this pattern. If you practice five times a day for a full week, you will train your brain in this new response to any difficult moment. Then you can repeat it any time you need to, any time at all. It's portable equilibrium.

Why Hand on the Heart works: When you breathe deeply into the heart center, you're activating the calming parasympathetic branch of the nervous system. When you breathe in a sense of ease or safety or goodness, you're restoring a coherent heart rate variability which allows your heart to respond more flexibly to stress. When you remember a moment of feeling safe and loved and cherished with someone, you're activating the release of oxytocin, the brain's direct antidote to the stress hormone cortisol. You may actually feel the warm glow of the oxytocin as it washes through your body, coming to a sense of safety, trust, and calm.

Any time you move your body and thus shift your posture, you shift your physiology-the basic functioning of your body's systems. That includes shifting the activity of your autonomic nervous system and its state of stress and excitement. You may even experience shifts if you meditate sitting down, then lying down, then standing up. If you get sleepy meditating sitting down, stand up. If you feel restless and agitated, try meditating lying down. Moving the body is excellent rewiring for resilience. Here are a few other movement practices you may explore:

1. Grip and release: Bring your awareness to your hands, and slowly tense your hands into fists, and then release the tension into your open palms. Do that tensing-releasing a couple of times. Notice any shifting of your inner state.

2. Progressive muscle relaxation: This juxtaposition of tension-relaxation is the basis of progressive muscle relaxation, in which we are tensing a muscle group, counting for 7 seconds, relaxing that muscle group, counting to 15. Relaxing twice as long as tensing helps the body relax, a wonderful tool to use when going to sleep at night. Try this tension-to-relaxation shift in each part of your body, starting from your head, all the way down to your toes. And the counting, as in the box breathing, makes sure the higher brain is online but this time for the purpose of keeping attention focused on the task so the brain doesn't go into rumination or obsessive looping over the worries of the day.

3. Smile or frown: You can experience a shift when you place a pencil between your nose and upper lip; that makes you frown somewhat. Then place the pencil between your teeth; that makes you smile a bit. When you practice that sequence slowly enough, you can experience and notice shifting the state of your body and your emotions. Neuroscientists can see in their scanners: Smiling for even 20 seconds shifts the functioning of the brain.

4. Power Posing: You may already be familiar with the technique of Power Posing, used to shift the state of the body-brain from one of anxiety or tension to strength and calm. (It became famous thanks to Amy Cuddy's TED talk, the second-most-watched talk in the history of TED.)

To begin: Stand tall and erect with feet planted firmly on the ground, hip width apart. Lift up your spine, lift up your chest, lift your head, and stretch your arms high over your head, like tadasana, the mountain pose of yoga. Stay grounded in your feet and hips and torso, but feel the energy move up your spine, through your arms and the crown of your head toward the sky. It's getting the energy moving up the spine that is the most important part of the pose.

1. Before going into any situation that might evoke feelings of anxiety or shame-a job interview, a business meeting, a court hearing, a tax audit, a confrontation over serious misbehavior by a family member-find a quiet, private place where you can let yourself feel the anxiety or worry in your body that you want to shift. Gently not to overwhelm, and then move into the power pose. Stand tall and erect, feet about hip width apart, chest lifted and head held high, your arms held high over your head,, the mountain pose of yoga.

2. Let yourself feel strength and energy in your body. Experiment with different poses to learn what allows you to experience these feelings most reliably.

3. Then you can move back and forth between the posture of anxiety or worry and the posture of the power pose for about 5 minutes. Gradually letting go of the posture of worry and remaining in the posture of power, strength and courage.

4. Practice your power pose in the moments before you enter your challenging situation, and then walk mindfully into that situation with more inner strength and energy. With frequent practice, your power pose becomes a natural way to develop and tap into your inner strength, courage, and resilience.

As the poet James Russel Lowell wrote,"Mishaps are like knives, that either cut us or serve us, as we grasp them by the blade or the handle." In this sense, mindfulness practice is about creating choices for ourselves-about how we perceive a stressor or a challenge, how we react, how we react to our reactions, how we perceive ourselves coping or not coping, how we choose to respond to the issues. And we learn that we can.

Getting back up when you stumble may seem easier for some than it does for others. The good news is, resilience is a like a muscle-here's how you can strengthen yours over time. Read More

Whether you're looking for live guided meditations connecting you to others, a quick practice to help you find your ground, or a free course on how to meditate, here's how the Mindful community is coming together to serve in the days and weeks ahead. Read More

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Resilience Expert Offers Three Ways to Tap into the Wisdom of the Body - Mindful

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We lose our car keys and our wallet, we discover mold in the bathroom, our dearest friend moves across the country, a family member is diagnosed with COVID-19. How can we practice holding life as it is with conscious awareness, full-hearted acceptance, and grounded equanimity?

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Allies can be a force for amplifying LGBTQ+ voices, and a support system for individuals in the community. Choose from one of our featured topics to…

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Healthy relationships bring out the best in you and make you feel good about yourself. A healthy relationship does not mean a "perfect" relationship, and no one is healthy 100% of the time, but the signs below are behaviors you should strive for in all of your relationships.

Healthy relationships manifest themselves as healthy communication; another important part of a healthy relationship is loving yourself. Here are some characteristics and behaviors of a healthy relationship.

See all 10 signs

See 10 signs of an unhealthy relationship

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10 Signs of a Healthy Relationship - One Love Foundation

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Everyone deserves to be in a healthy relationship. Here are 10 signs of a healthy relationship, to help you improve your own relationships and learn to Love Better.

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While everyone does unhealthy things sometimes, we can all learn to love better by recognizing unhealthy signs and shifting to healthy behaviors. If you are seeing unhealthy signs in your relationship, it's important to not ignore them and understand they can escalate to abuse.

If you think you are in a dangerous situation, trust your gut and get help.

See all 10 signs

See 10 signs of a healthy relationship

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10 Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship - One Love Foundation

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Understanding these behaviors can help you figure out if you're in an unhealthy or dangerous relationship. These behaviors can be used to gain control and can have a negative impact on your well being and day to day life.

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In 2017, many teens with a progressive mindset consider themselves to be allies in some way, shape, or form. But with privilege comes power, and it's important to understand how to effectively use that space to lift others up. Wearing a feminist T-shirt doesn't make you an ally - your actions do.

So what exactly makes someone a "good ally," and how can an ally show solidarity with a group without overstepping? Sixteen-year-old Native activist Hallie Sebastian is here to share tips with Teen Vogue readers about how to be the best possible ally in your community, school, or friend group.
A good ally amplifies the voices of the marginalized.
Using one's privilege to amplify the voices of a marginalized group is what being an ally is all about. From a position of privilege, straight, cisgender, white allies automatically have an advantage over LGBTQ people and people of color they wish to advocate for. Having privilege isn't something to be ashamed or guilty of, it's something to be aware of. Instead of taking advantage of that privilege, a good ally uses it to the benefit of a marginalized group.

Poor allyship is speaking over marginalized people by taking credit and receiving recognition for arguments that the unprivileged have been making for their entire lives. A simple way to self-check your allyship is to make sure you're "staying in your lane," meaning when you discuss social injustices that you don't experience, you remain objective. For example, a white person shouldn't be subjectively advocating for grievances against PoC, as they don't experience that injustice firsthand. Instead, they should listen to what PoC have to say and promote that firsthand knowledge. This counts online, too: Tweeting #BlackLivesMatter for retweets isn't the same as actively supporting the movement and its champions.

Minority groups already feel as if their experiences are trivialized enough, and with allies constantly overstepping, advocation gets frustrating. A white person can make the same argument as a PoC and receive more recognition for it, all because they're making it from a position of privilege. Too often it feels as if no one hears what marginalized groups are saying unless it comes from the mouth of an ally - people hear our grievances but they don't hear us. The unprivileged want to be heard - and not only when an ally speaks for us.
A good ally recognizes constructive criticism - and doesn't get defensive.
When discussing allyship - especially when explaining the best methods for showing solidarity with marginalized groups - many privileged people tend to become defensive. But if someone from a group you're aligned with tries to help you better your activism, it isn't an attack - they are simply telling you how you could better help raise awareness. Accept this advice as constructive criticism and apply it to become a better ally. Listen to the voices you're advocating for and don't get offended. If your intentions as an ally are sincere, you should always be open to ways to better yourself and your activism. People never like to be proved wrong, but before becoming defensive, ask yourself, "Am I upset because this person is suggesting I am wrong? Or am I just nervous that I am being confronted?" Allow yourself to be educated.
A good ally reaches out to those affected to see what help they may need.
If an ally hears of an injustice that affects a community [they are not a part of] (http://www.teenvogue.com/story/how-to-support-protests-when-youre-not-affected-by-the-issue), their first action should be reaching out to those who are experiencing it. Allies should learn how they should go about raising awareness directly from marginalized groups; that way they are assisting and supporting rather than overstepping. Nonmarginalized people do not experience social injustices like those they advocate for do, so they can't vocalize grievances in the way marginalized people can. Ask how you could help, offer your support, and give them the opportunity to speak and act for themselves. If they don't need any support, stand back and allow these groups to take action.

To the nonmarginalized: Use your privilege to lift up those without the same advantages you have. Listen, [be open to constructive criticism] (http://www.teenvogue.com/story/how-to-be-a-good-ally-during-pride-month), and always accept education from the groups you stand in solidarity with. Amplify the voices of those who are typically silenced by society and promote their cause.

Related: How I Feel As a Native Woman When Trump Idolizes Andrew Jackson
Check this out:

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3 Ways to Tell If You're REALLY Being a Good Ally

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In 2017, many teens with a progressive mindset consider themselves to be allies in some way, shape, or form. But with privilege comes power, and it's important to understand how to effectively use that space to lift others up. Wearing a feminist T-shirt doesn't make you an ally - your actions do.

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A Guide to Being an Ally to Transgender  and Nonbinary Youth

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A Guide to Being an Ally to Transgender  and Nonbinary Youth

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Guide to Being an Ally to Transgender and Nonbinary Young People | The Trevor Project

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An introductory educational resource that covers topics and best practices on how to support transgender and nonbinary young people.

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10 Ways to Be an Ally & a Friend

10 Ways to Be an Ally & a Friend

1. Be a listener.

2. Be open-minded.

3. Be willing to talk.

4. Be inclusive and invite LGBT friends to hang out with your friends and family.

5. Don't assume that all your friends and co-workers are straight. Someone close to you could be looking for support in their coming-out process. Not making assumptions will give them the space they need.

6. Anti-LGBT comments and jokes are harmful. Let your friends, family and co-workers know that you find them offensive.

7. Confront your own prejudices and bias, even if it is uncomfortable to do so.

8. Defend your LGBT friends against discrimination.

9. Believe that all people, regardless of gender identity and sexual orientation, should be treated with dignity and respect.

10. If you see LGBT people being misrepresented in the media, contact us at glaad.org.

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10 Ways to Be an Ally & a FriendBe a listener.Be open-minded.Be willing to talk.Be inclusive and invite LGBT friends to hang out with your friends and family.Don't assume that all your friends and co-workers are straight. Someone close to you could be looking for support in their coming-out process.

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Don't Suffer From Your Depression in Silence

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Don't Suffer From Your Depression in Silence

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Get a daily email featuring the latest talk, plus a quick mix of trending content.

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Nikki Webber Allen: Don't suffer from your depression in silence

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Having feelings isn't a sign of weakness -- they mean we're human, says producer and activist Nikki Webber Allen. Even after being diagnosed with anxiety and depression, Webber Allen felt too ashamed to tell anybody, keeping her condition a secret until a family tragedy revealed how others close to her were also suffering.

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Skip to content

Online screening is one of the quickest and easiest ways to determine whether you are experiencing symptoms of a mental health condition.
Mental health conditions, such as depression or anxiety, are real, common and treatable. And recovery is possible.

How does it work?

After your mental health test, you will see information, resources, and tools to help you understand and improve your mental health.
How can online mental health testing help me? What do my mental health test results mean?
Please note: Online screening tools are meant to be a quick snapshot of your mental health. If your results indicate you may be experiencing symptoms of a mental illness, consider sharing your results with someone. A mental health provider (such as a doctor or a therapist) can give you a full assessment and talk to you about options for how to feel better.

This website is an informational resource. We are not a crisis support line. If you need immediate help, you can reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 or using the chat box at 988lifeline.org/chat. You can also text "MHA" to 741-741 to reach the Crisis Text Line. Warmlines are an excellent place for non-crisis support.

For all other screening-related questions and non-emergency support, please use MHA's Contact Us form.

Mental Health America Inc., sponsors, partners, and advertisers disclaim any liability, loss, or risk incurred as a consequence, directly or indirectly, of the use and application of these screens.

MHA Screening is made possible through the generous contributions of individuals and organizations that share our vision of mental health for all. This program is supported, in part, through philanthropic contributions from Abbvie, Alkermes, The Anthem Foundation, Janssen, Neurocrine Biosciences, The NFL Foundation, Sage Therapeutics, Takeda Lundbeck Alliance, and Teva.

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Skip to content Online screening is one of the quickest and easiest ways to determine whether you are experiencing symptoms of a mental health condition. Mental health conditions, such as depression or anxiety, are real, common and treatable. And recovery is possible.

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American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

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American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

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Talk Away the Dark from the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

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Suicide is a topic that hides in the shadows. All too often it goes unaddressed, even when we may sense someone is struggling.

You can make a difference by learning the warning signs, knowing the risk factors, and bravely having a REAL open and honest conversation with someone you care about. Learn more with AFSP's tools, resources and creative ways to help #TalkAwayTheDark.

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Suicide is a topic that hides in the shadows. All too often it goes unaddressed, even when we may sense someone is struggling. You can make a difference by learning the warning signs, knowing the risk factors, and bravely having a REAL open and honest conversation with someone you care about.

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It's easy to fall into negative thinking patterns and spend time bullying yourself, dwelling on the past, or worrying about the future. It's part of how we're wired - the human brain reacts more intensely to negative events than to positive ones and is more likely to remember insults than praise. During tough times, negative thoughts are especially likely to spiral out of control. When these thoughts make something out to be worse in your head than it is in reality, they are called cognitive distortions.

Fast Facts

Of people who took an anxiety screen at mhascreening.org in 2020, 64% felt afraid, as if something awful might happen at least half of the time or nearly every day. [1]

Half of the people who took a depression screen at mhascreening.org in 2020 felt that they were a failure or had let themselves or their families down nearly every day. [2]

One study found that 85% of what we worry about never happens at all, and in the 15% of times where worries came true, 79% of people handled the difficulty better than expected or learned a valuable lesson. [3]

Common Cognitive Distortions

Overgeneralization: Making a broad statement based on one situation or piece of evidence.

Personalization: Blaming yourself for events beyond your control; taking things personally when they aren't actually connected to you.

Filtering: Focusing on the negative details of a situation while ignoring the positive.

All-or-Nothing Thinking: Only seeing the extremes of a situation.

Catastrophizing: Blowing things out of proportion; dwelling on the worst possible outcomes.

Jumping to Conclusions: Judging or deciding something without all the facts.

Emotional Reasoning: Thinking that however you feel is fully and unarguably true.

Discounting the Positive: Explaining all positives away as luck or coincidence.

"Should" Statements: Making yourself feel guilty by pointing out what you should or shouldn't be doing, feeling, or thinking.

Tips for Challenging Negative Thoughts

Get Screened Now

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It's easy to fall into negative thinking patterns and spend time bullying yourself, dwelling on the past, or worrying about the future. It's part of how we're wired - the human brain reacts more intensely to negative events than to positive ones and is more likely to remember insults than praise.

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5 Tips to Protect Your Mental Health During Coronavirus Crisis | UC San Diego Health

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American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

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Human beings like certainty. We are hard-wired to want to know what is happening when and to notice things that feel threatening to us. When things feel uncertain or when we don't generally feel safe, it's normal to feel stressed. This very reaction, while there to protect us, can cause all sorts of havoc when there is a sense of uncertainty and conflicting information around us.

A large part of anxiety comes from a sense of what we think we should be able to control, but can't. Right now, many of us are worried about COVID-19, known as the "Coronavirus". We may feel helpless about what will happen or what we can do to prevent further stress. The uncertainty might also connect to our uncertainty about other aspects of our lives, or remind us of past times when we didn't feel safe and the immediate future was uncertain.

In times like these, our mental health can suffer. We don't always know it's happening. You might feel more on edge than usual, angry, helpless or sad. You might notice that you are more frustrated with others or want to completely avoid any reminders of what is happening. For those of us who already struggle with our mental wellness, we might feel more depressed or less motivated to carry out our daily activities.

It's important to note that we are not helpless in light of current news events. We can always choose our response. If you are struggling, here are some things you can do to take care of your mental health in the face of uncertainty:

1. Separate what is in your control from what is not. There are things you can do, and it's helpful to focus on those. Wash your hands. Remind others to wash theirs. Take your vitamins. Limit your consumption of news (Do you really need to know what is happening on a cruise ship you aren't on?).

2. Do what helps you feel a sense of safety. This will be different for everyone, and it's important not to compare yourself to others. It's ok if you've decided what makes you feel safe is to limit attendance of large social events, but make sure you separate when you are isolating based on potential for sickness versus isolating because it's part of depression.

3. Get outside in nature--even if you are avoiding crowds. I took a walk yesterday afternoon in my neighborhood with my daughter. The sun was shining, we got our dose of vitamin D, and it felt good to both get some fresh air and quality time together. Exercise also helps both your physical and mental health.

4. Challenge yourself to stay in the present. Perhaps your worry is compounding-you are not only thinking about what is currently happening, but also projecting into the future. When you find yourself worrying about something that hasn't happened, gently bring yourself back to the present moment. Notice the sights, sounds, tastes and other sensory experiences in your immediate moment and name them. Engaging in mindfulness activities is one way to help stay grounded when things feel beyond your control.

5. Stay connected and reach out if you need more support. Talk to trusted friends about what you are feeling. If you are feeling particularly anxious or if you are struggling with your mental health, it's ok to reach out to a mental health professional for support. You don't have to be alone with your worry and it can be comforting to share what you are experiencing with those trained to help.

We are in this together, and help is always available. If you're feeling alone and struggling, you can also reach out to The Crisis Text Line by texting TALK to 741741 or National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK.

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Taking Care of Your Mental Health in the Face of Uncertainty

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Human beings like certainty. We are hard-wired to want to know what is happening when and to notice things that feel threatening to us. When things feel uncertain or when we don't generally feel safe, it's normal to feel stressed.

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National Suicide Hotline
Dial 988 and you will be directed to the hotline.
Available 24/7
Helps individuals in suicidal crisis with support
(1-800-273-8255
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org

Fairfax-Falls Church Crisis Link
Available 24/7
Support to anyone in Fairfax
703-324-7000
Text "CONNECT" to 855-11
wcsb@fairfaxcounty.gov

Crisis Textline
Available 24/7
Support to all individuals in crisis

Text “HOME” to 741741
www.crisistextline.org

Trevor Project Lifeline
Available 24/7
Confidential suicide hotline for LGBT youth

866-488-7386
http://www.thetrevorproject.org

Substance Abuse Mental Health Awareness National Helpline
24/7, English and Spanish
Support and referral for drug and alcohol services

1-800-662-HELP (4357)
https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline

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Intimate partner violence is characterized by coercive behavior, which is an act or pattern of acts such as assaults, threats, humiliation, intimidation or other forms of abuse used to harm, punish or frighten victims. This pattern of abuse often causes victims to fear what their abuser will do if they seek help.

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202-333-7273

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The DC Rape Crisis Center is deeply committed to the health, wellness and saftey of our clients, as well as the broader community. Out of abundance of caution, and in accordance with the COVID-19 pandemic, the DC Rape Crisis Center is suspending in person services, and will be delivering services remotely until further notice.

Our therapists will be providing virtual counseling services to youth & young adults, as well as adults who need our support during this challenging time.You can still call or email to schedule an intake appointment for services. For adults you may reach out to Rubi Mancilla at 202-470-1188 or rmancilla@dcrcc.org.

For Youth and Young Adults you may call Alyza Weinberg at 202-470-1530 or aweinberg@dcrcc.org

Our advocates are available via our 24/7 hotline please reach out if you need support 202-333-RAPE.

If you are any agency and would like to request training and technical assistance virtually please reach out to Chandra Dawson at 202-618-5088 or cdawson@dcrcc.org.

We know that these are challenging, and unprecedented times right now. The staff at the DC Rape Crisis Center will continue to create pathways for your healing journey. If you have any further questions please reach out to dcrcc@dcrcc.org

We are wishing you, and your loved ones good health. Take care and be well.

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The DC Rape Crisis Center is deeply committed to the health, wellness and saftey of our clients, as well as the broader community. Out of abundance of caution, and in accordance with the COVID-19 pandemic, the DC Rape Crisis Center is suspending in person services, and will be delivering services remotely until further notice.

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Psychology Today: Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist

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View the latest from the world of psychology: from behavioral research to practical guidance on relationships, mental health and addiction. Find help from our directory of therapists, psychologists and counselors.

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"When I learned of Melanin & Mental Health's existence through the happy hours and Instagram posts, I was immediately impressed that Eliza and Eboni had assembled such a platform for local therapists of colour to congregate, advertise, and have a little fun in the process. So when I decided to re-open my private practice, the directory was a non-brainer. I have been listed at this point for over a year and love the fact that this site and its directory exist for clients to be able to find therapists who look like them and 'speak their language.' "

Vaughn P. O'Neal, LCSW-S

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"When I learned of Melanin & Mental Health's existence through the happy hours and Instagram posts, I was immediately impressed that Eliza and Eboni had assembled such a platform for local therapists of colour to congregate, advertise, and have a little fun in the process.

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https://nqttcn.com/en/

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National Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network - NQTTCN is a healing justice organization that works to transform mental health for queer and trans people of color.

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The National Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network (NQTTCN) is a healing justice organization committed to transforming mental health for queer and trans people of color (QTPoC). We work at the intersection of movements for social justice and the field of mental health to integrate healing justice into both of these spaces.

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Therapy for Black Girls is an online space dedicated to encouraging the mental wellness of Black women and girls.

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NOTICE: We apologize for the delay in updates recently, we're in the process of transitioning to a more permanent solution.
We will be keeping everyone updated and are committed to providing high quality resources.
We appreciate your patience.

Welcome to the Asian, Pacific Islander, and South Asian American (APISAA) Therapist Directory. It is our hope that this resource would help to facilitate your search for a therapist.
If you are a provider and would like to be added to this directory please fill out this form.

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APISAA Therapist Directory - Asian Mental Health Collective

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NOTICE: We apologize for the delay in updates recently, we're in the process of transitioning to a more permanent solution.We will be keeping everyone updated and are committed to providing high quality resources. We appreciate your patience. Welcome to the Asian, Pacific Islander, and South Asian American (APISAA) Therapist Directory.

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Virginia Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence Action Alliance hotlines

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Virginia Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence Action Alliance hotlines

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leer en español

Have you been hurt, abused, or felt controlled? Are you a friend, family member, or professional wondering how to help someone who has been hurt? Do you want to know more about sexual assault, stalking, controlling behavior, or making a report? Contact us.

I want to chat with an advocate. (Chat feature works best on a computer or tablet.)

I want to text with an advocate: Text us at 804.793.9999

I want to call and speak with an advocate: Toll-free hotline 1.800.838.8238 (Note: We have access to interpreters for more than 200 languages via the Language Line.)

You deserve safety and support. Whether someone has hurt you in the past or is hurting you now, we're here to listen, and connect you to resources closest to you. Free. Confidential. 24 hours a day. 7 days a week. 365 days a year.

Our Crisis Response Team, which includes multi-lingual and multi-cultural staff and volunteers, is standing by to help you. We believe in you. We respect your choices. We are here for you.
I am a friend, family member, or professional looking for resources.

Trained advocates are available to talk confidentially with anyone who wants support, no matter where you are in the process.

What can I expect?
Every situation is unique, and it can be difficult to talk about. Once you let us know it's safe to talk, we'll ask if you can tell us a little more about what's going on. The choice of what and how much to share is up to you. People reach out at different times in their relationships, so advocates might ask questions about what options feel best for you. Together we can think through what's most important and get you connected to resources that are the best fit.

Confidentiality is important. We do not record hotline calls and are not mandated reporters in Virginia. We do not share any information with others (like 911 or outside service providers) without your consent. Because we are a confidential hotline (with the ability for people to be anonymous) and want to uphold safety and security standards, advocates cannot confirm contacts, reach out to anyone without their consent, or be requested in court.

Click here for our Chat.*
Text: 804.793.9999
Toll-free hotline: 1.800.838.8238

*Chat feature works best on a computer or tablet.

The Virginia Statewide Hotline is a space where survivors and people impacted by violence, like friends, family, professionals, and the general public, can connect with trained advocates.

We will listen, offer support, and connect you to resources in your area.

Free. Confidential. 24 hours a day. 7 days a week. 365 days a year.

Click here for our confidential chat*
Text: 804.793.9999
Helpline: 1.800.838.8238

*Chat feature works best on a computer or tablet.

The LGBTQ+ Partner Abuse and Sexual Assault Helpline focuses on anti-violence in the queer community. This is a space for survivors and people impacted by violence, like friends, family, professionals, and the general public, to connect about LGBTQ+ centered resources.

We also work closely with Virginia Anti-Violence Project, whose mission is to address and prevent violence within and against diverse LGBTQ+ communities across Virginia.

Free. Confidential. 24 hours a day. 7 days a week. 365 days a year.

Click here for our confidential chat*
Text: 804.793.9999
LGBTQ Helpline: 1.866.356.6998

*Chat feature works best on a computer or tablet.

The Prison Rape Elimination Act (PREA) hotline is staffed by the statewide hotline. We provide emotional support, reporting services, and connections to advocates for hospital accompaniment. This is an option for adults in state facilities* who have or are experiencing sexual assault or sexual harassment while in the care of the Virginia Department of Corrections.

Are you a family member, friend, or loved one of someone who needs PREA help? Contact us.

Free. Confidential. 24 hours a day. 7 days a week. 365 days a year.

Click here for our confidential chat (Chat feature works best on a computer or tablet.)
Text: 804.793.9999
Confidential PREA Reporting Hotline: 1.855.602.7001 (Follow the prompts to speak with us.)
Write: Action Alliance P.O. Box 17115, Richmond, VA 23226
Email: PREAGrievance@vadoc.virginia.gov

*Please note that local/regional jails and youth/young adult facilities often have direct relationships with their local sexual violence agency. We can help connect you to the appropriate resource.

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leer en español Have you been hurt, abused, or felt controlled? Are you a friend, family member, or professional wondering how to help someone who has been hurt? Do you want to know more about sexual assault, stalking, controlling behavior, or making a report? Contact us. I want to chat with an advocate.

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Fun, interactive & educational 4-hour event that brings awareness to mental health and suicide prevention. Reserve your IMALIVE Mental Health Fair date today!

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When athletes are called upon to perform in high-pressure situations many of them describe having peaked senses that they use to their advantage. They're able to quiet their minds, zone out the audience, and make the catch. Kids with test anxiety have the opposite reaction.

"Anxiety also has the potential to shut you down," explains neuropsychologist Ken Schuster, PsyD. "When kids are having test anxiety they can't think clearly, they can't judge things the way they could if they weren't anxious. All of your other abilities get clouded up by anxiety."

There are a number of different reasons why some kids might be more susceptible to anxiety. Test anxiety often goes hand-in-hand with learning issues. Children who have ADHD or a learning disability are often already feeling anxious about schoo l, and when it's time to take a test that sense can be heightened. "If I have ADHD and I am prone to inattention, if I start feeling anxious on top of that I'm going to have a lot more difficulty," notes Dr. Schuster.

Likewise, when a student has a limited amount of time to take a test and knows that he processes things slowly, he's probably going to start feeling anxious.

Kids worried that they won't do well, for whatever reason, are prone to more anxiety. Kids with an anxious temperament who worry about making mistakes or performing in general-from singing in music class to going up to bat at baseball-tend to feel more test anxiety. Kids who believe that they won't do as well in a particular subject-like girls influenced by the stereotype that boys are better at math -may also be more prone to test anxiety in that subject.

The common denominator is that if you think you aren't going to do well, you're going to feel more anxious going in. "What I have seen when I work with kids who have test anxiety is they tend to say, 'I'm so stupid,' " says Matt Cruger, PhD, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. "That can't be a helpful mindset to have when taking tests. In a more general way I'm really trying to rehabilitate kids' sense of themselves as competent learners."

Learning strategies to bolster your confidence going into the test is a good approach. Often that starts with changing how you study. Dr. Cruger says that 90% of the students he works with don't have an effective model of studying. "What they end up doing most often is rely on their memory of what they heard in class, or review their notes by reading them over," he says. He helps them try other more active methods that give them more mastery over the material.

- Know the test format. "Imagine if you took the SAT but you never did any SAT prep. That could happen to a kid all the time," says Dr. Cruger. "They studied the content but they didn't know what the format was going to be, so they don't feel like they are prepared." So kids should try to find out what format the test will be. Multiple choice? True or false? Essay? A combination? Just knowing the format will help them feel more prepared and take away the shock they might feel when they are handed the test. And if it is possible to take some practice tests, do it.

- Reorganize the material. Try to think about what the main ideas are in what the class has been studying. Outline the big events and issues, and think about the themes that unite them. This is a more active style of studying that helps kids think about what they have been learning in a different way from how it was presented, which will give them a richer understanding of it. And the better you understand something, the harder it will be to stump you.

- Think about possible questions. Predicting and answering questions ahead of time helps kids gain more mastery over the material and feel more confident. But try to think flexibly. "We like our tests to require people to solve the problem, but often not in the way we taught them the problem," warns Dr. Cruger. So if you know you will have some essay questions to answer, try to predict what the topics might be and practice writing your answer ahead of time. If you know there will be some word problems, think about how the things you've learned in class might be turned into a word problem. Look at the word problems that already came up on homework assignments.

Even after having done all you can to prepare, it's still good to be armed with some strategies for getting through the test and putting the brakes on any anxiety you might start feeling in the moment.

- Have a plan: Dr. Schuster says that kids who learn and use basic test-taking strategies tend to feel more confident. For example he recommends:

Don't spend too much time on any one question.

If it's a multiple choice test, read each answer and then cross out the ones you know aren't right to help yourself narrow it down.

Pick an answer and stick with it-we all have the tendency to second-guess ourselves and it can lead to wasted time and wrong answers.

- Break things up: When you start to feel panicked, look for a way to change the focus. For example, Dr. Cruger says that if he sees a question that really throws him off during a test-the kind of question that makes him think, "Is this written in English?!"-he will sometimes turn to the last page and answer the last question first. "Somehow breaking up the routine seems to be helpful for getting things done," he says. "Other people have told me they do this, too."

- Practice calming techniques: Sometimes kids like to bring things like worry stones into tests that they can use almost like a stress ball. Practicing deep breathing and using mindfulness techniques can also be effective.

- Accept when you don't know something. Sometimes the best way to manage your anxiety is to accept that you don't know the answer to a question and move on. If you feel like the test was unfair and didn't give you a chance to show your knowledge, you can advocate with the teacher later.

- Accommodations Some kids who really struggle with test anxiety may also be eligible for accommodations during test time. For example, some kids might need to get up and take a break during a test if they are really starting to panic and need to calm themselves down. Sometimes kids get more time because they aren't working at an optimal speed because they're experiencing low grade panic throughout the test. Kids may even be eligible for a modified version of the test.

Sometimes it can be hard to convince kids to start using new study or test-taking strategies. "You always need to sort of sell kids on the idea of trying something different," warns Dr. Cruger. This can be frustrating for parents and teachers, who only want to help, but Dr. Cruger points out that "Kids are being asked to learn lots and lots of stuff from very well intentioned adults all the time."

If they don't understand the rationale behind a new study method, they probably aren't going to adopt it, so parents and professionals working with kids should be explicit about how a new technique might be helpful.

But when kids start feeling like they've studied well and they know the material and they have strategies to fall back on if they need them, their attitudes going into a test will transform. And having the right attitude is important. "I think the best test-taking mindset is something along the lines of 'I'm a monster, I'm going to kill this test. There's no way I can be fooled or do badly,' " says Dr. Cruger.

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Tips for Beating Test Anxiety - Child Mind Institute

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Learn test anxiety tips for children. Child Mind Institute teaches study strategies and coping skills that reduce anxiety and improve performance.