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I believe that my work has room for improvement.  However I do agree with the statement. I think that in my writing i need to improve on my S.P.A.G. As well as this i need to use different synonyms in my text. The quote "Elizabeth and Matilda (both aged 6)" is good because,first i introduce the two characters then instead of musing a comma to extend my sentence i use brackets around it. This lets the reader know that I have something to say in addition to what has already been said.This has improved the flow of the text and how the reader takes it in.

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George bates how does the author use descriptive language in the extract

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George bates how does the author use descriptive language in the extract

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In this extract the author uses personification to bring the trees to life. In the extract you can tell this by "dancing skinny trees waltzing in the wind ". This gives connotations of a windy day, but "waltzing" is a very slow dance this confuses the reader so it makes them picture a very calm winters day this then builds the scene. personification is giving a inanimate object human characteristics, a author would use this technique to work his way into the readers head and lead them down the path he wants them to go basically to get the reader to think like the author. The word "skinny" is a adjective and has negative connotations of weakness and a sinister, so if the tree is skinny it will put a negative image in the readers head of a unhealthy tree making the reader achieve his goal.

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I agree with the comment that I need to improve the flow of my text as I changed the setting simultaneously and this makes it slightly more difficult to follow what is going on. I started the text describing the day and the weather. "Walking through the woods on a cold snowy day" shows that in the introduction the main character (Nicholas) was already walking through the woods and then I back tracked to when Nicholas was still at home in the second paragraph. "When he looked outside on this wintry day" shows that Nicholas was still at home. To correct this I could've wrote "earlier that same day."

For this specific part of the text (paragraph 1 and 2) I wanted the reader to feel the same excitement a photographer would feel by describing the wintry day

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I believe that my writing has room for improvement. I should check over mein spag and develop the language features and add more structure to the writing for example "As i slowly walked along them i saw something in the destinace a man not a tall man at this distance he had looked like a midget ass he grew closer..." i  have realised that i

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This story can been better by going in to depth with the story and talk more about the laughing at the end of the story. I should have put more tension into the whole  dramatic seen with in the story. The story was good overall with the hole dark scary vibe and the the boy from the story reaction from the bridge and the loud noise coming from the bridge. I wanted to put an effect of how the

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I agree with the statement "My GCSE Students have learnt a lot about imagery and emotive writing to create mood, tone and symbolism" because in my text I have used features such as: Imagery, anecdotes, verbs, adjectives etc.

I have used imagery when I described the dale with the use of words like 'Darkness' 'snow' 'Ice' 'Paths' 'Trees' just basically setting the scene and this creates tone and mood, you get this feel of dull, dark and crappy weather when reading through the text, it also benefits this imagery when I say 'evening' so that tells the reader that it is naturally dark.

I also lead an acedote during the text (short story) when it says the following line "One path leads you along the moor line and back down a track into the village but nobody knows where the other path goes" this also has a build up of suspense behind it as it gives it a sense of real mystery.

There could possibley be some symbolism in my text because 'Rusty' my dog could be that side of all our minds that want to go places we've never been when the text says 'Rusty had other ideas and darted off down the path on the left' which could have been the path which was feared and arose curriosity, the contrast that gets created from when he darts off down there to when i threw his stick into the light, creates potential terror

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After reading the statement given from Crystalle, I have decided to agree, as it has caught my attention and has made me refer back to my text which had solidified my decision.

Upon further inspection of my own text I realise the use of complex language such as the adjectives and nouns I had used showed a theme or re-occuring sense of insecurity at common language such as 'inhospitable' & 'cold' these words I have used to lay a baseline as to what the reader can use to understand my feelings without fully expressing these thoughts I conceal within the text, I have tried to make the reader feel as if it was them going through this situation by attempting to implicate/relate them to the common feelings felt as you would starting college in an 'inhospitable' mind-set scared and nervous but becoming more confident as their path roles out as they want it too.

I have started this text with a simile to make a mold of the story to come as I have related it to 'chaos' and 'distruption' i have done so because when the reader begins to read this text he/she will understand the relation of the panic I have developed and link it to the emotive language i included such as making my feelings clear but no expressing them fully,

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I agree with the statement Crystalle has made because I have learnt a huge amount of different language features and structural features, this is evident in my creative writing which I produced.

I have been working on a piece of creative writing and while I was editing it I realized I know a great deal of different structural features; a few of them being tone and build up and including suspense and tension by leaving a paragraph on a rhetorical question or ellipses.

An example to show I have used build up and a rhetorical question and then ended in my work would be in the piece of creative writing I produced "Where have they gone? No one knows..." this is important as it justifies  my huge improvement towards knowing more language features and structural improvements.

The rhetorical question followed by the ellipses this creates

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I agree with Crystalle that i have learnt a lot about tone, mood and symbolisms because I now know how to corectly make a symbolism in my writing and can explain what it is symbolising.

I now know how to create a mood with in my storys and can now iditify what effect it has on the reader and how it makes them feel towards a character such as when we looked at Frankenstein how the mood and tone changed from one to another crating an effect on the reader.

I have also learned that the tone of the writing is important as it is important on how the story is being told wether it is moveing too fast or too slow the tone needs to be correct to effect the reader correctly.

I have crated an effect on the reader in my writing by makeing them feel as if they are in my shoes and just first starting college makeing them feel lost and confused I have also made the reader sympathise with me as they read how I felt.

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I agree with the statement because in the text when I used the sentance "Or would I of been left in the classroon alone while the students had fun exploring and learning new things?" to make the reader think im asking them a question, when in fact its a rhetorical question. I used rhetorical question to ask the audience a question about the charicters life choses. Also within this section of the text ive used the word "alone" to make the reader feel sad for the charicter

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I agree with Crystalle's statement to the extent. I've learned a lot more about imagery and emotive writing to create mood, tone and symbolism.

To back up with what I said, I have selected a quote from my descriptive writing piece."Should I run and try to get across quicker with the likely chance of falling or walk slowly and reduce the chance of falling"

The reader has an image of the main character looking scared and can feel the emotion of fear going through the character as he has to make a decision on how to get across.

It is a good effect because if the reader also felt scared then it means that the reader has put himself/herself in the character's shoes.

It's a good thing because the reader is interested in the story and hopes that the character can get across the bridge safely. The character would be relieved and so would the reader because it makes them feel glad that main character has made it across safely.

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Evaluation of 'Walker Brothers Cowboy' (No homework..)

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Evaluation of 'Walker Brothers Cowboy' (No homework..)

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I agree with what Crystalle has said. As within our lesson time, she has helped and pushed us to develop our skills to understand imagery, emotive writing, tone and symbolism.

The use of shorter sentences help to symbolize the point and emotion the character is portraying; 'But I call back, "You will be asleep," and do not even turn my head." This shows his impatience, and unwillingness to get his brother an ice-cream cone. The text is simple and straight to the point. It reflects the character, with it written in first-person and in present tense.

The author used emotive writing to convey how a character is feeling, and this is evident within the first paragraph. "Make me stand and turn for endless fittings, sweaty, itching from the hot wool, ungrateful," indicating the situation the character is in, and how he is feeling, the author gives us insight into his emotions. Feelings itchy and impatient, the character is ungrateful; becoming restless, his mother slaved to present him clothes to wear for school, and he feels as though he doesn't deserve them.

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I agree to the extent with Crystalle's statement.
Firstly, in my opinion from start of the year till present I have learnt a lot about imagery.

Secondly, in relation to Crystalle's statement, I have also learnt how create an emotive writing to create mood.

In the first paragraph, the adjective "snowball fighting" symbolises of conflict and argument and makes the children to fight with each other. As they make the snowball they throw at each other, even that is a dangerous game it makes the children to end up with fight. The use of "snowball fighting" effects on the reader to think of what happens when the children had their game and think of one will get hurt.

In addition in the second paragraph, "their mother warned to stop running" evokes the tone of the mother's voice that she kind of shouted at her children to stop running over the bridge, because the bridge had cracks on it and it is delicate to run over as there is ahigh chance that bridge to collapse.

In addition in the paragraph 3, "screaming for help" also shows the tone of their voice that they are shouting with aa loud voice and scared and soon they wab=nted to get out from the river.

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I agree that we have been taught a fair deal about Imagery and emotive language as I do often use these themes through my work when I can.

In the first paragraph, I have used the sentence "The cold chilly wind bit and tore at my fingers." This is personally a good use of emotive language because it creates a mood of harshness and unfamiliarity in this area that was once known as a welcoming and warm place. This harshness is also reflected in winter in most cultures, as snow often doesn't bring good times for most people. It has given most people worry and dread for most of modern civilization. Thus this harshness of winter is reflected in this emotive sentence.

I believe I have also used a good simile in the sentence "It was much like Styrofoam rubbing against a cardboard box." I believe that this was a fitting comparison, as it mainly relates to a strange and unknown that people can relate to but not many people will be able to listen to that sound very often. Furthermore, I believe that the simile can relate to the unknowing feeling that opening a package can give to some people as there is a constant unknown feeling about what is going to be in a package; much like how there is is a strange unknown feeling to someones first experience to winter.

I do however feel that some lines are lacking in structure or an ongoing theme. Sentences like "Soon I decided to look further up on this white and brown structure, which then leads me to find some strange glass structure that seemed to be of alien origin once again" make it seem less fluent and whole. This could however be fixed with a topic sentence used at the start of every sentence to give it more structure. I could also possibly improve it with sentences that link back to the starting sentence. Although I don't think they should be used every time, I do believe that they could help tie up all of my paragraphs in a coherent way.

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I agree to the extent we have been taught a good deal of amount about imagery and emotive writing in the past three months. As at the start of the academic year, we went outside of College to create emotive writing which were linked to the five senses of what we were greeted by outside. From doing this it enhanced my ability to write with more imagery and emotion. It also enhanced my ability in using tone and symbolism.

I think this statement is good because in my work I have used the phrase " The trees looked dead without the leaf's". This phrase sets the tone of death and creates the mood of sadness. This statement is also good because I have included symbolism in my writing, an example of this is the phrase " Winter wonderland". This phrase is symbolizing the season of Winter.

I also agree to the extent  about learning more about using emotive language in my writing as I included the words "nervous" and " fearful", these are used to describe my feelings while surrounding the forest. my This can be used as evidence towards developing my writing skill in using emotive language.  I do however think I require more work in using imagery, as I think that something that I'm lacking.

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I agree with the statement as the line "common pathways had been lost" this gives personification to the pathway; symbolizing how blizzards can make people lose their sense of direction. This makes the reader feel nervous as they don't know where they are heading to. The word common shows how even people who use the pathway everyday are likely to be lost due to the blizzards effects. this was good as it shows the effect of a changed environment would have on people that live nearby.

I agree with the statement as the line "dead faceless trees" this gives personification to the trees. This symbolizes how baron the land is. This makes the reader feel uneasy to how the land used to be full of plants which have now withered away. The adjective faceless is good as it shows how the tree used to show emotion of life in the summer however has died in the winter. This symbolizes sadness to how the trees lived happily this can be linked with "whistling trees retell their sorrowful songs" as this symbolizes how the trees only know about sadness in their life. This makes me feel blue to how the life has been drained from the trees.

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I agree with what Crystalle has said as we have been taught the different ways that we can use emotive and imaginative language. While also telling us the ways that it can be interpreted with the different ways it can affect someone.

One of the ways we have been told to do this is by using repetition. ''It was a sound I could listen to over and over again'' This allows the reader to imagine the sound of the snow which it is describing and give them the feeling that they're in the story with them

For example,  one of the ways that we have be taught is in creative language, this is mainly imaginative language. This is where we have been taught to think about the many ways that the story could progress.

Another is where we were taught to use our emotive language skills to evoke emotions on the reader. This can be with the way that we use our descriptive language with the way we describe the settings of the area or describing the actions that are going on in the story to one of the characters and how they're feeling.

We have also been taught the ways that we can use symbolism in our writing to show the reader an indirect idea or suggestion that could be a part of the story, yet without having to actually make a statement about the thing they're trying to say to the reader.

Similar with tone, we have been taught how to use tone in a way that allows us to give the reader a way of understanding what the situation is or how the mood is at that moment in time giving the reader the right information to understand how to read the text and give them a insight into the story situation

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I strongly agree.
I have consistently used imagery in my text to describe the environment and have senses to create emotion and tone.

"...in Stewarts park, clenched to my mothers hand, shaking in my boots as if they were stone" I use the senses to described how I felt whilst in the park and throughout the text, this originally sounded good in my head but I now realized that "shaking in my boots as if they were stone" doesn't make much sense and "shaking in my boots, freezing as if they were stone" would be better.

Further in the text, I describe the environment, was it was "The land was blanketed with snow in all directions" I could improve this by describing the extent of how FAR the snow goes adding additional imagery. "The land was blanketed with snow all the way to the mountains." I describe the day as "The day was clear and not a cloud in sight". I could improve this by describing how the sun looks though the trees "The day was clear and not a cloud in sight, the sun peacered though the trees with beautiful rays"

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I disagree as in my work, I have not put any adverbs. I should do this to make my work more descriptive as this puts the reader into the charecters perspective. I have proved this when i used a adjective to explain how the wood on the bridge was broken. For this i wrote "partly snapped pattern of wood". This activates the readers imagination to be able to see from the perspective of my charecter. If i used a variation of sentaces structures i would be able to make my work more dramatic for example i could us a short sentences to create a cliff-hanger.
In my work i did not use any symobolism. This is important as it makes my work more intressting and makes the reader think about what it could mean. For example if i said "her eyes were blue" this could mean the litteral meaning or it could mean that she was upset.

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I agree that i have learnt how to use high standard features within my writing and can produce good imagery and tension. i achieve this by including adjectives along with personification such as 'unforgiving trees'. This makes the trees feel more life like and more than just environment. I also  included an adjective such as  'distorted' giving more imagery to the facial expressions

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I agree heavily with this statement as at the start of this year I struggled with answering exam questions with a great detail. However now I feel more confident as I have been given more knowledge and resources to help me answer all the questions.

Creative writing.
The forest is described as a "desolate, cold, foggy forest." The writer describes the forest this way to create tension and imagery. The reader creates the image of a cold empty forest where you can see little to non. The writer then creates more, different imagery as he say's "shimmering white layer." This then makes the place seem more happy or more welcoming as "shimmering white layer" refers to a layer of snow. Snow falls around Christmas time which is a very happy time for most people. The focus then shifts to the forest being lonely and unhappy "lonely forest."
The writer creates symbolism as he says "bright illumines pink coat." The color "pink" is described as a bright illumines this symbolizes how the children are full of life. This makes the reader care more about them as they are children. this is an example of emotive language which affects the reader in a more personal way so if anything happens to the children the reader is effected more than if the focus was about an adult.

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Use the picture below as inspiration for a descriptive piece of writing.

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I strongly disagree. I am unable to find any effective imagery in my writing at all. I am extremely pause heavy with my writing using short sentences, one line paragraphs and ellipsis in an attempt to make my writing tense when all I does is make the reader crawls along my writing and a stupidly slow pace with zero tension making the whole piece completely pointless. paragraph three end with the sentence "Anything but..." and then paragraph four is barely even a full sentence "Life's perfect curve ball" This was supposed to generate tension due to a supposedly "Dramatic pause" when in reality it was a stupid miss use of punctuation and waste of paper since without the pause the sentence would have had exactly the same effect on the reader. On the flip side I feel is have a good use of symbolism for example "Life perfect curve ball" symbolizes something that no one expects or could prepare for. I also feel like I have done a good job with describing certain things. For example, I have gone into great detail when describing the envelope as cheap and dry. This emphasizes how fragile and cheap a person's future can be.

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I feel I agree with the question since in my writing I attempted to use a high amount personification and metaphor, for example I used “The groan and moan of levers and bolts moving defiantly in the cold” since a lock can’t be defiant it is personification.
I feel personification is good in this text so that it conveys to the reader the thought of icy cold weather due to the lock creaking so loudly.

Furthermore, I also agree due to my use of words such as an archway of snow to describe the snow covered bridge, along with using "entangled" to make a comparison between the character's hair (who is also the first person narrator of my creative writing) and the twisted woods; this crafts imagery of the character having curled twisted hair along with the forest being a thick, vast, expanse of trees.
I used imagery in this text to convey pictures to the reader of the environment in this case the wood and thoughts of how the character looks.

Other uses of imagery reinforce my opinion that I agree with the question and that it is a good thing, which is backed up by my use of the words “moan” and “groan” to describe the creaking of the mechanism in the lock since when locks and metal get cold they scrape against each other also I thought this would be effective to describe that sound and include more senses in my creative writing.