# data[].attributes.body
I'm 17
that's a liminal space
between childhood and adulthood

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I'm literally life.
Life can get a little mad sometimes.
Life can also be peaceful and tranquil and kind.
Despair is not my opposite.
My twin is Death.
She takes people to their rest. People need rest after all the madness.
I'm called Delight or Delirium depending on the age I find myself in.
If an age is mad
I am mad.
Because life is mad.
I need to know this.

# data[].attributes.body
The remote viewers knew my spirit's signature from Anandamayi Ma

They followed it and then had me drowned as a baby. 22 days after Ma died.

Then they surrounded me on 17 sides and forced me into a body. The body was the number 18. The 'me I am god' and 'I made a promise' and I had to enter the body.

This was 202 days after Ma died.

They did this to Isis too and it didn't go well for them. She had the power of life. She could increase it and decrease it.

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Remote viewers manipulated my essence. They whispered in my ear that I needed to change my voice. So I did.
I asked for it. I thought it was an angel. I thought an angel changed my voice. I was remembering the truth and people laughed.

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An essence is an essential nature. It's someone's nature and Gurdjieff laughed and played games with them. He thought it was something beneath him. He wanted to decrease essence. This is madness. Worlds have ended for less. Using sound to manipulate an essence causes destruction. That's what you and Gurdjieff have done. Do you think this going to end well for them, his followers? It isn't. I woke up. I'm remembering who I am. Are you remembering who you are, Nottingham?

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Government planted people to bully me to see how I would react in middle school and high school.
*****
Had two friends, who were children of despair. They were 'bullies' but I understood them and didn't treat them bad.

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Pan has his people
Despair has her people
Delight/Delirium has her own people (innocence or life)
Artemis has her own people
Essences have their own people
Desire has her people too
Destiny has his own people
Cassandra has her own people too
I'm the essence with the power of life, because life loves everything, delights in everything, and that's why I need a Valor to help me sort it all out, to lead me...i'm a servant not a master

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Every choice I ever made
was perfect
it was the perfect choice

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What is perfect?
A bisexual spirit
Inside a bisexual body.

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They tried to see if they could decrease an essence with anti-psychotics. They tried to do it with me and they can't. They can't decrease my essence. Their medicine is not effective anymore.

# data[].attributes.body
What has your Jesus done for anyone lately? Your Christian Valors, your diamonds, are cowards and show no benevolence to women. All the Christian Valkyries flee from me because they are smarter than their men. You don't know what the Dharma is. You're still a follower of Gurdjieff who sold his secrets to the government so they could experiment on children. You think sorcery will save you and the rest of his followers. Your esoteric systems are a crude, unnatural science. You don't know what real magic is. Gurdjieff thought he could melt down an essence but he couldn't. Why don't you just be yourself, Ted Nottingham. Why don't you just be your essence. Be who your are and not some sham artist. Jesus became a curse to get a blessing and what a blessing it has been. Now there is no balance. Now men are cowards and show no benevolence toward women. They do not do what women ask. They don't do what is needed. Is the truth too inconvenient, Ted Notthingham? Is it? All you have to do is listen and then do what a woman asks. The whole of the Dharma is that. Your so foolish that you think you need to change. Change what? Your essence. This is why men are so very foolish. You think women are beneath your notice. She is the I AM. You are the I DO. She is beauty and you are strength. You do what she asks unless you are a coward. It's that simple. Your Gurdjieff was a foolish, foolish man. Why don't you choose better? Follow the Dharma and then you will see how foolish you have been.

Wrote this to Ted Nottingham

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I'm not a Christian.
I don't care about their morality.
I don't care about their bad, their evil.
I care about the balance.
I am an elemental.
I don't care about what they care about.
I am Immortal.

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I stopped reading stories with men and women because of how women are treated. They aren't treated with love or benevolence.