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Kyle is a 17-year-old young woman who has a passion for becoming a medical doctor in the future. Currently, I am motivated to move towards her goal of being successful because of her two moms. I would like to give them the treatment that they need for free so that they would not have to worry about spending loads of money on their health. To do so, I am fulfilled to graduate and exceed my expectations of 'just' passing my subjects this school year.

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When I used to only be a newbord kid, my guardian would always say that I used to be quiet and I do not cry all the time. I only cry whenever I get hungry and I would always want the comfort of my mom and guardian beside me. Even when I know I can’t remember those times clearly, I know that I saw the world bright like rainbows and butterflies. What I saw was like a living fairytale—living in a cozy home. However, the quirky side of me as an was I always play with my own saliva. Thinking of it now may sound digusting, but I don’t know that term whan I was an infant because things didn’t matter that much.

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Exploring with a touch of happiness despite not smiling

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When I was a 2-3 years of age, I would always do things unfamiliar for my family. I have experienced eating cigarette butts by accident, choking on a chickenjoy, making ceelin vitamins as a normal drink, and eating inside the fridge when my guardian was cooking and I was unattended. This may look like a silly phase of my life, but looking back, I realized how my guardian guided me to a path that shaped me into a person who learns how to apologize and learn how to respect people whenever they couldn’t follow what I want when I was a kid. She was the one who made it look like my family was perfect. I didn’t realize that my family was slowly breaking down because of my dad, she knew all along yet she kept it inside of her in order to protect my relationship with my dad. This developed autonomy within the love of my guardian by being able to explore eating by myself even when it makes a mess. She would always understand, especially when I cry out of hurt and agony whenever I get an asthma attack and other kinds of illnesses since my immunity is weak, she doesn’t get mad. Instead, she hugs me to calm myself down.

That’s why in the picture above, I may not always smile on pictures but whenever someone goes near my guardian, I would always become protective of her because I did not want anyone to get her away from me, because during those times, I was thinking that she was the only one by my side while my parents are busy working endlessly.

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When I’m already in pre-school, I would always sing alone or sing-along with the people in the house whenever I finish my assignments. I also love playing dress-ups with my barbie dolls and even with my self. I pretend that I am a model because I feel so confident in myself because they would always hype me up. I remember that I dreamed of being a singer first than becoming a doctor. I always love smelling new socks with my pacifier and hide it whenever visitors come because I would get embarassed. This stage of me makes me feel happy when looking back. I see how my talents started when I was still young and it grew, making me the person of who I am today. Though, I was always grumpy with other people, I remain soft and calm when I’m with my guardian that introduced me to making friends with other people. To add, I started learning bisaya. I remember my first word was “taligsik” since I would always hear my the adults say that whenever it rains lightly. This is the stage where I remember most of the enjoyable memories in my life.

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When I was already in Elementary, those were the times I started to realize I had siblings because I used to beg for my parents to male another baby so that I can have someone to take care of. Years after that, my dad introduced me to my other siblings and surprisingly, they are older than me! I was really happy since those were the times I recognized my Lola more and also made me grateful of how big of a family I have. Despite already being stressed with knowing the truth about my family being broken, these people made my life feel better at some point temporary. Even though I was devastated to the point I developed an autoimmune disease that I am still suffering ‘til this day, I am grateful for God because I believe it was the right timing when things got genuinely heavy for me as a kid. Facing those kinds of challenges as young as I was, I am happy that I getting through it and slowly, even now, I am accepting the fate of my family, yet it made me a stronger person.

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I have realized that in each stage, this is the stage where I found and lost so many people in my life. It honestly is never easy to trust new people and bond with certain people that I believe will last forever, but did not. It hurt me to an extent that I became scared of every new people that come in to my life—it feels like I have not given them such permission to know me as how I give others the permission before, just because I am scared that they will all leave in the end.

I remember when there was a time in grade school, I found so many friends, yet during my high school life, it seems like they vanished. We parted ways where we tend to grow out of each other. However, the person on the lowest right is the only friend that stayed with me through thick and thin. I realized that having a safe space doesn’t require a lot of people, it only requires one with so much love and unconditional support. Thankfully, God did not bless me with just one, he gave me multiple people to stand by me—stay with me like the pillars of my life. This is the stage where I have united more with my siblings, have the chance to meet new people and open my mind in having fun, yet setting my limitations, and fixing my relationship with my mom after the years of chaos into our lives despite the miles away from each other.

I believe life gives you the choice in finding people you get along with, however it does not let you go beyond to the point of stopping them from leaving. I have realized that I cannot please everyone. There are people who will also choose me—the same way I would choose them. So, I believe that even when my adolescents stage is already ending, I will surely carry these lessons until my last stage in life.

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Colourful Minimal Brainstorm Roadmap Mind Map (1)

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Was the subject Personal Development helpful for you? How did this subject help you know yourself more?

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Was the subject Personal Development helpful for you? How did this subject help you know yourself more?

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Words may not be enough to describe how this subject made me realize that I am valid and seen despite my differences, but it wouldn't be only the subject that helped me, but also how my teacher delivered everything with open discussions. Before this subject and I crossed paths, I thought I was too sensitive for this world, where I was just out of place, and I would mostly feel pressured to adjust so that people would not see me differently; I would feel anxious every time I express myself through my humor, my words of advice, and how I interact with others -- I will always feel that I still can't fit in. However, this subject changed my perspective. On the topic of social relationships, I have realized how mature I am, how deep I am in understanding things, and not all people can be the same as anyone right now. Further thinking, it made me accept that most of the people I meet now may think I am not their cup of tea, but it does not matter anymore as long as I openly communicate things, I am aware that I pose no danger, and most of all, if I don't have a seat on their circle, I can make my own table with chairs to those I know that deserve it.

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What were your key takeaways from the subject?

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What were your key takeaways from the subject?

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My key takeaways from Personal Development are the importance of loving oneself before giving love to others. Emphasizing one's mental health is crucial for understanding that there are different levels of sensitivity each person has, and the way your problem may personally seem bigger, it does not give you the right to invalidate them because you don't know what they are going through every single day. Because of this, personal problems may arise, and at the end of the day, it's just you. Thus, I realized that it is important to practice healthy coping mechanisms to help yourself grow, rather than being stuck in one place. Practicing self-care, such as exercising, socializing with friends, detoxifying from social media standards and expectations, journaling, and seeking help from a health professional. This is important to avoid dysfunction in social, personal, and school life.

Secondly, maintaining self-care through putting boundaries. I have realized that I don't have to please anyone, because at the end of the day, I won't benefit from any of it, I will just get drained and question my self-worth. Because of this, I learned the importance of reserving my own peace by staying away from drama and handling conflicts by openly communicating directly. Not only that, learning to say no can result in a lot of better things, such as conserving your energy for things you really want to do rather than forcing yourself to be in a space you're not supposed to be in. Thus, learning this helped me to take care of myself without feeling selfish, since this helped me know myself and give myself a break from everything that's draining me.

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What two topics were your favorites and why?

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What two topics were your favorites and why?

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The 2 most important topics I have learned during the 2nd grading period of Personal development the mental health and well-being (1)and family structures(2). Topic 1 helped me learned that taking care of myself is essential because if not, it would make a domino effect. For example, I tend to sleep well, learn how to say no during situations that do not fit my values, and prevent myself from dipping into social media drama makes me reserve my energy, leading me to focus on my own priorities: studying, journaling my thoughts, and conserving my energy on the right circle of friends can result me to being more productive and motivated. Secondly, learning about family structures has made me feel included, especially since I have been facing the fact of a broken family, and adjusting to a blended family on both sides used to be hard. However, this lesson taught me that I can still receive that kind of love I need in ways like this. I have learned that being in different kinds of families does not make me less of a normal person because unexpected things happen that we don't want, but that does not mean we can't gain the things we need anymore.