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If you are playing the role of ‘Observer’: Observe what the mediators did that were helpful and what could be improved.

You may wish to record the conversation in writing in order to accurately locate the parts of the conversation that you wish to analyse.

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If you are playing the role of ‘Serene’: Share why you shared the post online and how you felt when you saw the hurtful responses and comments.

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If you are playing the role of ‘Sonya’: Share how you felt when you saw Serene’s post and what made you respond in the way that you did.

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If you are playing the role of ‘Mediator’: Practise ‘Hear’ by reflecting Serene and Sonya’s feelings and paraphrasing their stories to check your understanding. Recall the skills you listed at the start of the lesson.

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Using a neutral tone with a moderate speed and volume

Avoiding the use of words that imply an absolute such as “always” or “never”

Acknowledge emotions (“I see that you’re upset,” or “I understand that this is a powerful topic for you”).

Focus dialogue on facts rather than personal opinions.

Listen and restate perspectives, especially if one party is receiving all of the heat (“What I think ____ is trying to say is...”).

Identify a common goal: both parties agree on the desired outcome for the conflict

Brainstorm solutions or alternatives

Agree on an action plan