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Is it good to be honest with children about death and dying?

Children and young people want and need adults to be honest, particularly when talking about death and grief. If we do not tell them the truth, their active imaginations can fill in the gaps often with more frightening misconceptions.
More on telling a child that someone has died
How can I explain to a child what happens when someone dies?

A simple biological explanation of death is helpful: the heart stops beating, the lungs do not work so the person cannot breathe, and their brain stops working. Referring to the body left as an empty shell can help them to understand that the person is no longer alive as they knew them. If the family holds any beliefs, these can then be introduced.

It can be helpful to explain that when someone dies, they cannot feel hot or cold, hungry or thirsty, and they are not in pain. It is also important for them to understand that the person will stay dead, however much we may wish them to come back to life as they were.
More guidance on children's understanding of death at different ages
What sort of language should I use to explain death and dying to a child?

Phrases such as 'gone to sleep' or 'passed away' or words such as 'gone' or 'lost' may feel kinder but are misleading and can lead to confusion; for instance, we encourage children to 'find' things that they have 'lost' so they may continue to look for the person who has died. Similarly, using the term 'gone to sleep' may lead them to associate going to sleep with dying which can result in anxieties at bedtime.

What if a child feels upset when we talk about death or dying?

Talking about death can elicit emotional reactions. This can feel difficult, but by acknowledging this and talking openly about death and grief, it can help children and young people to trust in the adults around them. It will also encourage them to ask questions, share any worries and express their feelings.

What should I say to a child if I feel upset when I talk about death or dying?

Children learn from the adults around them, so if you experience an emotional reaction, it is best to acknowledge your feelings while reassuring them that you will be OK in a moment. This will help them to know that it is OK to express their own feelings.

How can I answer questions children often ask about death or dying?

Although it can feel quite daunting, it is important to answer any questions as honestly and fully as possible. Although it might seem tempting to try and distract children and young people, this may actually cause them to become more anxious than hearing the truth.

Will I die? Will you die? Why do people die? When will I die?

To answer these questions, it can help to explain that all living things die, that this is part of the cycle of life. As living things, people will also die. You can reassure them that most people are very old when they die. It may help to remind them of all the people they have in their lives and to think about all the things they wish to achieve in their lives, places they might like to visit, jobs they might want to do, their hopes and dreams.

What happens when you die? Where do you go to when you die?

It can help to start with a simple biological explanation of death; the heart stops beating, the person stops breathing and their brain stops working. Younger children might like to feel their breath going in and out and their heart beating to help with their understanding. It can also be helpful to refer to the body as being a bit like an empty shell. Some young people want to know what happens to the body, for example between death and a funeral. This might naturally lead to a discussion about beliefs, ceremonies or rituals.

You might say, "Some people believe... and others think ...", or that you are not sure what happens when someone dies. It can be a good opportunity to ask them what they think and have a discussion with them.

"Can we stop people from dying?"

It is important to remind them that people die because we are living things, just like plants and animals. For younger children, it might help to talk about most people being old and their bodies being worn out, but younger people may die if they have an illness or serious injuries which cannot be cured.

For older children, it can be helpful to discuss how we cannot change the fact that someone has died but we might consider what we can learn about improving treatments or safety guidance to help others in the future.

Encourage young people to consider what sort of things help them to live healthy lives - such as eating well, keeping safe and looking after themselves and others. Explain that medicines and treatments for illnesses and accidents are always being improved and people today live longer and healthier lives than they did in the past.

"Why are you crying?"

If you experience an emotional reaction when talking about death with a child or young person, it is best to acknowledge your feelings while reassuring them that you will be OK in a moment. You might tell them that you also find talking about it difficult, or that you also feel sad. This will help them to know that it is OK to express their own feelings.
Please see our range of short guidance films on related topics: See also a film of a discussion from The Good Grief Festival on grief education in schools

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Short films delivered by our support practitioners giving guidance on a range of bereavement topics. Read more

A list of books and resources relating to grief and bereavement and what may help. Read more

Watch short films and read experiences of bereaved families and how support has helped them. Read more

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charity bereavement child death grief loss baby stillbirth miscarriage suicide young people

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Guidance for teachers and parents on talking to children about death and dying,

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10 Dyslexia Myths | Understanding Dyslexia

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Understanding Dyslexia | 5 Facts About Dyslexia

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improving access

improving outcomes

sleep

A clear, self-explanatory workbook covering the principles of sleep hygiene

panic

A workbook for treating panic attacks using graded exposure.

Designed to be used with a therapist.

progressive muscle relaxation

A simple worksheet for progressive muscle relaxation

other resources

Other non-text resources. Videos, podcasts audio files etc.

Also, other comics about mental health.

about therapy comics

Many of the interventions used to treat mental health problems can be illustrated. This allows a universal resource to be available for therapists to use with anyone who struggles with typical text-based materials.

​

Therapy Comics is developing high-quality, materials for evidence-based interventions that are in common use by therapists.

​

The materials on this site have been designed for Psychological Wellbeing Practitioners, High Intensity Therapists and CBT therapists working in IAPT services in England.

about me

I have worked as a Psychological Wellbeing Practitioner in the NHS since 2012.

A few years ago I carried out a triage assessment with someone with chronic insomnia and Generalised Anxiety Disorder.

I was surprised to hear that he had previously had unsuccessful CBT. He said:

​

"The CBT was all "read this... write that...." and I couldn't do it. I've got really bad dyslexia"

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And this got me thinking.

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We don't need all these words.

​

​

Bad design is committing the same moral sin as a lack of access. In fact, really, at the end of the day, we all have disabilities. We all have cognitive limits, we all have limits of our senses, and a failure to recognise the multiplicity of barriers that stand between us and what sometimes is life saving information is an urgent public work that needs to take place.

​

Scott McCloud interviewed on 99% Invisible

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Therapy Comics. Mental health resources for therapists, using comics instead of text.

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We help children, young people, parents, and families to rebuild their lives when a child grieves or when a child dies.

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British Heart Foundation - The Small Creature, an animated story to help bereaved children

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Fight Flight Freeze – A Guide to Anxiety for Kids

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All the staff, children, parents and carers are really proud of Sparsholt Church of England Primary School. It is a privilege to be part of this exciting, inclusive and forward-looking school community. We aim to create and maintain an effective partnership between home and school and develop a shared responsibility for your child's education.

Our Core Christian values of Courage, Compassion and Creativity are at the centre of our school community. These values capture the true heart of everything we do and we strive to live by them by our words and our actions; they underpin our school vision and enrich every child as they develop their identity and shape their future lives.

Our belief is that by focussing on our core values, children will develop the knowledge, skills and attitudes to grow and flourish as independent and reflective learners who blossom into respectful and caring citizens.

High standards are achieved through a dynamic curriculum. Working closely together as a school community, we are able to enhance learning with an exciting range of enrichment opportunities in sport, music and technology. It is our aim to impart a love of learning in all our pupils.

Thank you for taking the time to visit our website. Please do not hesitate to contact us if you have any questions; please feel free to make an appointment to come and visit our school.
Mrs Elizabeth Hanratty - Headteacher

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All the staff, children, parents and carers are really proud of Sparsholt Church of England Primary School. It is a privilege to be part of this exciting, inclusive and forward-looking school community. We aim to create and maintain an effective partnership between home and school and develop a shared responsibility for your child's education.

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Browse Educational Resources | Education.com

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Browse Educational Resources. Award winning educational materials designed to help kids succeed. Start for free now!

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Site about touch typing technics, here you can download typing tutor, get online typing test and to play in online typing games.

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Looking to boost your typing speed? Kidztype.com has got you covered with our exciting collection of free typing games. Unleash the power of your fingers as you enjoy thrilling activities like whacking moles, racing through the jungle, bursting rockets, and competing in races with cars, bikes, and boats. Our captivating keyboard games provide the perfect blend of fun and skill-building, allowing you to enhance your typing skills while having a great time. With Kidztype's tailored-made games, you'll be typing faster and more efficiently in no time!

Fun and Engaging Free Typing Games for Kids: Boost Typing

Advancing Skills through Games:

Coordination and Accuracy: Typing game improve hand-eye coordination as kids learn to synchronize their hand movements with what they see on the screen. This helps them become more accurate and proficient in navigating the keyboard.

Vocabulary and Spelling: Many keyboard games incorporate word and sentence challenges, expanding children's speech and enhancing their spelling skills. Kids reinforce their language skills while improving their typing speed by repeating words and sentences in a fun context..

Speed and Motivation: By offering challenges and achievements,kidztype games motivate kids to improve their speed and accuracy. Setting high scores and beating previous records provides a sense of accomplishment and encourages them to continue practising and advancing their skills.

Engaging Kids through Interactive Games:

Easy-to-Learn Methods: The games use simple and memorable techniques to teach keyboarding skills. Kids can quickly grasp concepts like letter placement, home rows, upper rows, and numbers, making learning more accessible and enjoyable.

Exciting Themes: With captivating themes like fantasy worlds, car races, and space adventures, these games capture children's imagination and keep them engaged. The immersive experience ensures that learning to type feels like an exciting adventure rather than a chore.

Customizable Difficulty: The games offer scalable complexity and difficulty settings, allowing children to progress independently. Whether they're beginners or more advanced typists.

Suitability for Kids of All Ages:

These Keyboard games and dance mat typing activities are suitable for kids of any age. Starting early with keyboarding skills sets a strong foundation for the future. Whether your child is just beginning or wants to refine their typing abilities, these games provide a platform for growth and improvement.

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Typing Games - Learn Typing with Free Keyboard Games - KidzType.com

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Kidztype Typing Games: Kidztype's keyboard games are the best way to master typing speed and accuracy. Choose a suitable typing game to sharpen your fingers! Check us out and start playing now!

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Learn how to touch type with the BBC Dance Mat Typing game. It’s a fun introduction to touch typing game for kids and covers levels 1, 2, 3, 4.

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Getting your little ones to sleep can be tricky. Here are 10 tips that may help your kids settle into bed.

Sleep is an important part of maintaining good health, but issues with falling asleep aren't just problems that come with adulthood. Kids can have trouble getting enough rest, and when they can't sleep... you can't sleep.

Bedtime can become a battle zone when little ones won't settle in and fall asleep. But there are ways to even the odds of victory. Try using these 10 tips to learn how to fight the battle... and win!

School-age children need between 9 and 11 hours of sleep each night, according to the National Sleep Foundation. But there's a lot of variability in sleep needs and patterns. Most kids have patterns that don't change much, no matter what you do.

Early risers will still rise early even if you put them to bed later, and night owls won't fall asleep until their bodies are ready.

That's why it's important for parents to work with their children in setting a responsible bedtime that allows them to get plenty of sleep and awake on time, says Ashanti Woods, MD, a pediatrician in Baltimore, Maryland.

Set a wake-up time based on how much sleep your child needs and what time they go to bed. Woods recommends creating a wake-up routine as early as the preschool years to help prevent stress for parents down the road.

And remember to be consistent with the schedule. Allowing your child to sleep later on weekends is generous, but could backfire in the long run.

Those extra hours of sleep will make it hard for their body to feel tired at bedtime. But if you can try to make bedtime and wake-up time the same, within an hour or so every day, you'll be making everyone's lives sooooo much easier.

Routines are especially important for infants, toddlers, and preschoolers. Woods recommends that after dinner the remainder of the evening should include light playtime, bath, brushing teeth, a bedtime story, and then bed.

Aim for a routine that is comforting and relaxing, setting the ideal bedtime atmosphere. Before long, your child's body may automatically start to become sleepy at the beginning of the routine.

Melatonin is an important piece of sleep-wake cycles. When melatonin levels are at their highest, most people are sleepy and ready for bed.

Research from 2011 found that blue light from a television screen, phone, or computer monitor can interfere with the production of the hormone melatonin.

Watching TV, playing video games, or scrolling web pages on a phone or computer right before bed keep your child up an extra 30 to 60 minutes, according to this 2017 study.

Make the bedroom a screen-free zone or at least make sure all screens are dark at bedtime. And keep your phone on silent when you're in your child's room - or don't carry it in there at all.

Instead of screen time, Abhinav Singh, MD, director of the Indiana Sleep Center, recommends reading to your child in the evening to allow their brain to rest.

Another hormone that plays a role in sleep is cortisol, also known as the "stress hormone." When cortisol levels are high, your child's body won't be able to shut down and go to sleep.

Keep pre-bedtime activities calm. This can help avoid excess amounts of cortisol in your child's system. "You need to reduce stress to make it easier to fall asleep," says Dr. Sarah Mitchell, chiropractor and sleep consultant.

Soft sheets, room darkening shades, and relative quiet can help your child differentiate between day and night, making it easier to fall asleep.

"Creating a sleep-inducing environment is important because it sets the stage for sleep by reducing distractions," says Mitchell. "When you're calm you are not distracted, and can fall asleep more quickly and with less help."

Your child's sleep cycle isn't just dependent on light (or the lack thereof). It's also sensitive to temperature. Melatonin levels help to regulate the drop of internal body temperature needed to sleep.

However, you can help regulate the external temperature. Don't bundle your child up too much or set the heat too high.

Whitney Roban, PhD, clinical psychologist and sleep specialist, recommends dressing your child in breathable cotton pajamas and keeping the bedroom temperature around 65 to 70°F (18.3 to 21.1°C) at night.

Ghosts and other scary creatures may not actually roam around at night, but instead of dismissing bedtime fears, address them with your child.

If simple reassurance doesn't work, try using a special toy to stand guard at night or spray the room with "monster spray" before bed.

Roban recommends scheduling time during the day to address any fears and avoiding using bedtime for these type of conversations.

"Children are very smart and will quickly learn that they can stall bedtime if they use the time to express their bedtime fears," she says.

Kids can have trouble shutting their brains off for the night. So, instead of increasing that anxiety by insisting that it's time to go to bed ("now!"), consider focusing more on relaxation and keeping your child calm.

Tryteaching your child a deep breathing technique to calm their body. "Breathe in through your nose for 4 seconds, hold for 5 seconds, exhale through your mouth for 6 seconds," says Roban.

Younger children can just practice taking long, deep breaths in and out, she says.

Sometimes, your best-laid plans just don't yield the results that you want. (Hello, welcome to parenthood!)

If your child has trouble falling asleep, has persistent nightmares, snores, or breathes through their mouth, they might have a sleep disorder, says Mitchell.

Always talk to your pediatrician if you have any concerns about your child's sleeping habits. They may recommend a sleep consultant or have other suggestions for you to try so the entire family can get a good night's sleep!

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Bedtime can become a battle when little bodies don't abide by the clock. Here are 10 tips to learn how to win the fight.

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Fortunately, specific behavioral changes and adjustments to the sleep environment will help most children with insomnia. We've compiled the top tips that are proven to help kids sleep. The recommendations outlined here are best suited for toddlers through early adolescence. Both babies and teens will have specific considerations of their own.

These lists may seem long, but you don't need to implement them all at once. It's better to focus on trying a few small changes, giving them time to work, and then adjusting your approach based on how your child responds.

Keep in mind that every child's sleep needs will vary based on their age, genetics, and cultural differences. Therefore, not all approaches will work equally well for all children, and there can be an element of trial and error. However, your patience will be rewarded in time as your little one learns to fall asleep quickly on their own and keep sleeping soundly through the night.

Sleep hygiene - a collection of habits and behaviors that promote good sleep - is vital for children. Many sleep struggles are caused or made worse by poor sleep hygiene. When practicing sleep hygiene, remember that consistency is key. Sleep strategies take time and repetition to be effective.

Create a Routine: Humans are creatures of habit. A lets your child's body and mind know that it's time to settle down and prepare for sleep. The actual routine can be specific to your child, but it should last around 20 minutes and consist of three to four quiet, soothing activities such as putting on PJs, brushing teeth, a warm bath, and reading. Bedtime routines provide children with a sense of familiarity and comfort, which acts in direct opposition to the uncertainty of insomnia.

Set a Bedtime: A sleep schedule works with your child's natural biological clock to promote dozing off with regularity. Bedtimes are most useful when they're consistent, so try to keep the same bedtime on weekends as on school nights. Altering bedtimes during the weekend will make it more difficult for kids to maintain their normal weekday schedules.

Implement a Screen Curfew: The ubiquity of screens makes this rule hard to implement, but it's well worth it. Mobile devices, TVs, and tablets emit a type of blue light that suppresses melatonin, a hormone that promotes sleep. Children may be to the effects of light from screens. Screen time also stimulates the brain, making it harder to wind down for sleep. Electronic devices should be kept out of the bedroom and ideally not used within one hour of bedtime. Consider using the created by the American Academy of Pediatrics.

Get Exercise: Physical activity is proven to help people of all ages . Most children need at least of exercise per day. Just make sure to avoid vigorous activity within two hours of bedtime. Otherwise, your child may feel wound-up and find it harder to fall asleep.

Avoid Scary or Violent Content: Feeling scared or worried is a common reason kids can't sleep. So it's no wonder that scary or violent movies, TV, video games, and even books in the evening are in children. If your kiddo likes the gory or spooky stuff, save it for the daytime.

Nix Caffeine: This is a no brainer. Caffeine is a stimulant that can both make it harder to fall asleep and reduce the quality of sleep. In addition to the usual suspects like soda, coffee, and energy drinks, watch out for more discreet sources like tea, decaf coffee (which still has trace amounts of caffeine) and chocolate. Even small amounts of caffeine can have a in a little body. Don't let your child consume caffeine , or preferably, avoid it all together.

Don't Sleep With a Pet: While it's tempting for tots to snuggle Fido in bed, a pet's movements and noises during the night can awaken them from a peaceful slumber. Try having your furry family member sleep outside of your child's bedroom for a few nights to see if that helps. To make the transition easier, include saying goodnight to pets in the bedtime routine.

Optimizing your child's bedroom is an integral part of inducing quick and seamless shuteye. People with insomnia are more likely to be distracted by an uncomfortable bedroom National Library of Medicine, Biotech Information The National Center for Biotechnology Information advances science and health by providing access to biomedical and genomic information. View Source , which makes sleep even harder. These tips can help you create the perfect sleep setup for your little one:

Room Temperature: The body and brain both in preparation for sleep, and this can be disrupted by a stuffy bedroom. To avoid this, try to keep the thermostat around 65 degrees.

Noise: Research suggests that even mild sound disturbances can , even if the sleeper never awakens. Consider noise-blocking curtains to cut down on street noise. You can also use a fan or white noise machine to drown out unpredictable or distracting sounds.

Light Level: Start dimming indoor lights as bedtime approaches, and keep your child's bedroom as dark as possible. This and . If your child is afraid of the dark, a small nightlight is okay.

Soothing smells: Calming scents like can have mild sedative effects. You might try using essential oils, a room diffuser, or dried potpourri sachet to provide a soothing, sleep-inducing smell.

Unfortunately, childhood anxiety is steadily rising Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) As the nation's health protection agency, CDC saves lives and protects people from health threats. known to disrupt sleep Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) ADAA's mission focuses on improving quality of life for those with anxiety, depression, OCD, PTSD, and co-occurring disorders through education, practice, and research. View Source . Stress is View Source in all ages, so anything that can reduce worrying before bed is helpful. Help your child learn to manage their concerns with these tactics:

Write In a Journal: Encourage your child to get their anxious thoughts out of their head and onto paper. It can also help for them to write about the good things that happened in the day. Focusing on the positive will help children feel more secure.

Mindfulness Exercises: Mindfulness exercises like meditation are proven to . There are many kid-friendly meditations that parents and children can do together. These often consist of simple breathing techniques, body awareness, or guided imagery. Look to books, tapes, and even smartphone apps for ideas.

Create a Worry Time: It's okay to discuss worries, just not at bedtime. Set aside a specific time during the day for your children to discuss their concerns and how to cope with them. This can free children of the need to dwell on worries before bed.

It's normal for even the best little sleepers to awaken from slumber and ask for a parent. When your child cries out for you, it's okay to tend to them. However, you should do so with intention. This is not the time to give in to demands, as doing so can increase stimulation and make it harder to fall asleep. Fulfilling your child's every request can also reinforce an unhelpful pattern of relying on parental assistance for sleep.

Instead, keep the checks short and simple. The point is to provide your child with reassurance that they're safe and cared for, while still fostering their ability to self-soothe and sleep on their own. Some parents may even wait a few seconds before answering a call so that their child has the opportunity to fall back asleep on their own.

If you have any doubt over whether your child's nighttime checks are appropriate, consult your child's doctor for guidance.

If your child continues to have trouble sleeping despite your best efforts, it may be time to check in with their pediatrician. Although uncommon, there can be more serious causes of childhood insomnia, such as childhood sleep apnea or restless leg syndrome.

Any of these reasons are cause to involve a doctor:

Significant daytime sleepiness

Frequent or severe snoring or other abnormal breathing during sleep

Suspected psychological or developmental condition

Considering medications or supplements to aid in sleep

For a couple of weeks before the doctor appointment, it can help to keep a sleep diary. This is a nightly recording of your child's bed time, nap times, sleep length, and activities. A sleep diary helps to identify patterns and possible problems to address.

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References

Esparham, A. (2020, January 2). Melatonin and Children's Sleep. HealthyChildren.Org.
https://www.healthychildren.org/English/healthy-living/sleep/Pages/Melatonin-and-Childrens-Sleep.aspx

Mindell, J. A., Li, A. M., Sadeh, A., Kwon, R., & Goh, D. Y. (2015). Bedtime routines for young children: a dose-dependent association with sleep outcomes. Sleep, 38(5), 717-722.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25325483/

LeBourgeois, M. K., Hale, L., Chang, A. M., Akacem, L. D., Montgomery-Downs, H. E., & Buxton, O. M. (2017). Digital media and sleep in childhood and adolescence. Pediatrics, 140(Suppl 2), S92-S96.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29093040/

Family Media Use Plan. (n.d.)., Retrieved September 23, 2020, from
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A.D.A.M. Medical Encyclopedia. (2017, August 30). Benefits of Exercise., Retrieved August 30, 2020, from
https://medlineplus.gov/benefitsofexercise.html

A.D.A.M. Medical Encyclopedia. (2017, August 30). How Much Exercise Do I Need?., Retrieved August 30, 2020, from
https://medlineplus.gov/howmuchexercisedoineed.html

Garrison, M. M., Liekweg, K., & Christakis, D. A. (2011). Media use and child sleep: the impact of content, timing, and environment. Pediatrics, 128(1), 29-35.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21708803/

Temple J. L. (2019). Review: Trends, Safety, and Recommendations for Caffeine Use in Children and Adolescents. Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, 58(1), 36-45.
https://linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S0890856718318847

Drake, C., Roehrs, T., Shambroom, J., & Roth, T. (2013). Caffeine effects on sleep taken 0, 3, or 6 hours before going to bed. Journal of clinical sleep medicine : JCSM : official publication of the American Academy of Sleep Medicine, 9(11), 1195-1200.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24235903/

Narisawa H. (2013). Anxiety and its related factors at bedtime are associated with difficulty in falling asleep. The Tohoku journal of experimental medicine, 231(1), 37-43.
https://www.jstage.jst.go.jp/article/tjem/231/1/231_37/_article

Harding, E. C., Franks, N. P., & Wisden, W. (2019). The temperature dependence of sleep. Frontiers in Neuroscience, 13, 336.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31105512/

Van Der Werf, Y. D., Altena, E., Schoonheim, M. M., Sanz-Arigita, E. J., Vis, J. C., De Rijke, W., & Van Someren, E. J. (2009). Sleep benefits subsequent hippocampal functioning. Nature neuroscience, 12(2), 122-123.
http://www.nature.com/articles/nn.2253

Burgess, H. J., & Molina, T. A. (2014). Home lighting before usual bedtime impacts circadian timing: a field study. Photochemistry and photobiology, 90(3), 723-726.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24918238/

Gooley, J. J., Chamberlain, K., Smith, K. A., Khalsa, S. B., Rajaratnam, S. M., Van Reen, E., Zeitzer, J. M., Czeisler, C. A., & Lockley, S. W. (2011). Exposure to room light before bedtime suppresses melatonin onset and shortens melatonin duration in humans. The Journal of Clinical Endocrinology and Metabolism, 96(3), E463-E472.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21193540/

Koulivand, P. H., Khaleghi Ghadiri, M., & Gorji, A. (2013). Lavender and the nervous system. Evidence-based complementary and alternative medicine : eCAM, 2013, 681304.
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National Center on Birth Defects and Developmental Disabilities. (2020, June 15). Data and Statistics on Children's Mental Health. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
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Anxiety and Depression Association of America. (n.d.). Sleep Disorders., Retrieved August 31, 2020, from
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Ong, J. C., Manber, R., Segal, Z., Xia, Y., Shapiro, S., & Wyatt, J. K. (2014). A randomized controlled trial of mindfulness meditation for chronic insomnia. Sleep, 37(9), 1553-1563.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25142566/

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Sleep Strategies for Children | Sleep Foundation

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Wondering about sleep aids for kids? These proven sleep tips will help children learn to fall asleep quickly and stay asleep.

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Fine Motor Skills Activities for Older Kids

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These fine motor skills activities could work with older kids who find other tasks too childish.

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Letter Reversals...they are a major cause for handwriting concern by most parent's standards. Here we are covering information about writing letters backwards and what is normal for letter reversals in development. We also have some great tips for addressing common letter reversal struggles and even reversal activities that can help with visual perception handwriting struggles. Read on!

Letter b and d reversals: These specific strategies cover letter b and d reversals.

Letter p and q reversals: You'll find more specific letter reversal information in this post on reversing letter p and q.

Also check out these activities to work on backwards letters.

Writing Letters in Reverse

Do letter reversals mean dyslexia? Not exactly! Dyslexia means problems learning to read, spell, and write. However, there is much more to reversals than what meets the eye, and should be assessed before jumping straight to the conclusion of dyslexia. Be sure to read our resource on Dyslexia and occupational therapy for more information.

One creative tool to support the skills needed for this area of development is our new color by letter worksheet. Just print and go and work on letter identification and matching skills.

Check out all of our letter formation worksheets for more free printables to target letter forming.

Letter Reversals Normal Development

Reversals are age appropriate up until 7-8 years of age!

That's right! Letter reversals are normal up to a certain age range. And when kids write letters backwards it is actually typical development in handwriting skills. Working on letter reversals in occupational therapy (and other visual perceptual areas) can be a common occurrence for school-based OTs...but just because kids are writing letters backwards, it doesn't mean there is a true problem indicating a need for intervention.

It takes our brains that long to integrate all the skills needed to form a letter correctly and automatically during written expression. Skills needed range from phonetic awareness, ability to imitate pre-writing strokes, automation of letter formation, and higher level cognitive skills for multi-tasking.

Some kiddo's develop these skills faster than others. Some kiddo's struggle with these skills and may receive support services such as occupational therapy or pull out services with their school's reading specialist before age 7.

Services provided before age 7 are typically preventative and because the child has shown struggles in the foundation skills needed for reading and writing, such as phonemic awareness, challenges with pre-writing strokes and shape formation (visual motor integration), poor fine motor skills, dominance concerns or underlying vision concerns.

What is a letter reversal

The term Letter reversals refers to several things related to reversing letters in reading or writing:

Writing a specific letter backwards, when they replace a letter with another such as forming a letter b as a d or a letter p as a letter q

Writing a letter upside down or flipped, such as forming a u as an n

Reading a letter backwards, as when kids replace a d with a b

Writing letters backwards as when kids write letters h, n, s, z, etc. in a mirror image

Transposing letters or switching the order of letters when writing

Reversing or writing numbers backwards

Common Letter and Number Reversals

So, knowing that it is quite common developmentally, to reverse letters and numbers up until age 7 or 8, it can also help to know which letters are commonly reversed in writing.

Letter Reversals List

These letters and numbers are often times transposed for one another:

It's easy to see why the letters and numbers listed above are often reversed. They all contain similar pencil strokes. For children that are just learning to write, spatial integration can be still developing. Kids are getting the muscle memory in place can replace one letter or number for another.

These letters are often written backwards:

Each of these letters has a starting point at the top and pencil strokes that then go into a different direction. Children that are still developing handwriting skills are establishing the motor plan for direction changes with the pencil. The can sometimes "guess" the correct direction which results in letters being written backwards.

Numbers that are commonly written backwards include:

Each of these numbers also have a direction change which could easily be confused.

In many cases, working on letter and number formation so the muscle memory is established with fix reversal issues. Using multisensory formation activities helps to establish that motor plan.

Phonetic Awareness and Letter Reversals

The current theory among the educational community is that reversals start with phonemic awareness. If a child is lacking phonemic awareness, they may struggle with letter identification and spelling needed for fluent written expression. Similar struggles may also be seen with numbers, resulting in a negative impact on math skills.

In my clinical experience, I have found that children with high rates of ear infections and PE tubes (ear tubes) struggle with sound awareness. If the kiddo is unable to hear the sound of the letter clearly and consistently, it leads to poor sound awareness.

I have also found that children with difficulties with attention and auditory filtering often pair the wrong letter sound with wrong letter. This is important to note in sessions as it may require remediation by a speech therapist or reading specialist if available. Here is more information and activities for auditory processing.

While phonetics play a large role in reversals, many other foundational skills may influence whether a child will struggle with reversals or not.

Hand Dominance and Letter Reversals

Hand dominance is typically fully developed by five years of age. Right at the same time most children are learning and mastering the formation of letters and numbers. It also coincides with the start of kindergarten, or formal education where children who are struggling may be noticed for the first time. Writing with both hands can be a common struggle and an indicator of hand dominance challenges.

Children with handedness issues, whether it's mixed dominance or delayed development of dominance, are more likely to struggle with left versus right tasks.

This plays into reversal concerns as many of these children cannot consistently discriminate left from right, leading to b's and d's, p's and q's being flipped. Often times, they are unable to recognize that they have made the mistake as their brain is registering the letter as they meant it to be.

Letter Reversals and Visual Processing

Vision is can be one of the biggest challenges facing children who struggle with reversals. Chances are, they have had an underlying vision concern that goes unaddressed or unrecognized during the critical learning period of letters and their sounds.

You will find much more information on visual perception in our free visual perception lab series.

(Children in the U.S. typically begin to learn letters and sounds between 3 and 4 years of age when they enter preschool programs. Curriculums now expect children to know their letters, sounds and how to write them upon entering kindergarten.)

Due to their vision deficit, the child may not consistently see the same image of the letter each time, or may not see the letter that is being taught due to "wandering" eyes or poor abilities to focus on the letter. The kiddo now has a poor foundation from which to build on, due to difficulties with recalling from their visual memory what the letter looks like, and pairing it with the correct sound.

To add to vision deficits, vision is not just what we see, or how the eye's work together. It is also a motor task of taking information in with the eyes and reproducing an image, or in this case, letters on paper. This skill is known as visual motor integration and also plays a role in reversals.

Here are free visual perception worksheets that can address a variety of visual skills.

Visual Motor Integration and Letter Reversals

Visual motor integration allows us to write, draw and paint freely. To do all of these things, we go through a set development of producing pre-writing strokes and basic shapes in imitation to freely producing them from our memories and eventually becoming automatic. Here is more information and activities related to visual motor skills.

Most children learn to imitate these strokes and shapes at a young age from top to bottom and left to right. However, some children do not learn it this way or their brains are not "wired" to follow this pattern of development.

Children who deviate from this pattern may have difficulties with reversals as they struggle to learn and integrate letter stroke combinations in the correct order. When this happens, they struggle to write fluently and reversals may begin to appear.

Signs of poor visual motor integration skills that could lead to reversals include:

Segmental Drawing-drawing a shape one stroke at a time instead of integrated

Bottom to top orientation when drawing

Right to left orientation when drawing

Difficulties crossing the midline during drawing tasks

Rotation of the paper to adjust for angle execution

Failed attempts to imitate basic shapes after the child has stated what the shape is

Executive Functioning and Letter Reversals

Executive functioning skills refer to our higher level thinking that includes attention, multi-tasking and memory, among many other skills. Writing requires all of these skills to be working at their best. If a child is struggling with any of these skills, they may demonstrate reversals and poor overall handwriting.

Reversals and poor handwriting may be the result of the child being unable to recall the strokes of the letter, the sequence of the strokes, what the letter looks like, where to start the letter, how big to make the letter, what each letter sound is, how to spell a word and complete their thought.

Oh, and lets add in that they have to remember how to hold their pencil correctly. For a kiddo who is struggling, this is a CHALLENGE.

There are so many more things that go into writing that may lead to reversals then what I have listed, but are too many to list out.

The main concept of executive functioning is that if the child cannot make it all work together, from fine motor to phonemic awareness to visual motor, they are more likely to struggle with reversals in their work.

Letter Reversal INterventions

It is important to recognize that reversals may be the sign of underlying deficits with foundational skills and should be addressed when they are noticed. The sooner that these underlying deficits are addressed the better off the kiddo will be. Once a child has had a long enough time period to practice incorrectly, it will be that much harder to break the "bad habits" and correct the reversals.

You will find many letter reversal interventions in this blog post.

This resource on letter b and d reversals is a helpful read on how specifically to work on these commonly reversed letters. You'll find multi-sensory writing strategies to address b-d letter reversals.

2. Try "building" letters to establish the motor plan needed to create muscle memory. Use different colors to help children see the ways that the pencil moves when writing letters and numbers. This letter construction activity explains more about this process. This letter building strategy, paired with other forms of multi-sensory handwriting and teaching letters in groups based on the ways the pencil moves can make a big impact.

Addressing some of the other co-existing issues discussed in this article can be a start.

3. Address the motor planning in handwriting necessary for letter and number formation. Strategies that develop motor planning skills utilizing multi-sensory approaches can help with letter reversal.

With handwriting practice of letters with visual, auditory, and kinesthetic sensory channels at the same time, the weaker channel may be reinforced (Berninger, 2000).

Multi-sensory letter reversal strategies include:

4. Work on visual perception with toys and games, and activities to address specific visual perceptual skills or visual motor skills.

5. Use cursive writing in some cases. Here are creative ways to teach cursive and our entire cursive writing series.

6. Gain a better understanding of visual processing and all of the "pieces" of the vision puzzle that play into letter reversal and other concerns by joining thousands of other therapists, teachers, and professionals in the Visual Processing Lab.

7. Use this Vision Screening Tool to identify and address specific vision concerns such as letter reversals.

8. Try some of these activities to address visual motor integration and eye-hand coordination.

9. Try rainbow writing.

Have concerns? Talk to your child's teacher or occupational therapist to address your concerns.

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Letter Reversals and How to Fix Them - The OT Toolbox

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Try these letter reversal strategies to help kids who write letters backwards. Understand what's really going on behind letter reversals in writing.

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What is dyslexia?

Dyslexic brains process information differently. This results in a pattern of strengths, like problem solving, creative thinking and seeing the big picture. Plus, challenges like spelling, reading, writing and rote learning.

Knowing how to spot, support and empower dyslexic thinking can transform the life of any dyslexic child.

How to spot it

How to support it

How to empower it

Get the facts
Download our simple factsheets.

Watch

Watch our simple videos and learn how to support your child's xtraordinary dyslexic mind.
WATCH HERE

Email

Email your school, education authority, or politician to ask for all teachers to be trained.

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Explain dyslexia to your child

Being dyslexic is a brilliant thing. After all, the inventor of the aeroplane was dyslexic. And the lightbulb! So are many xtraordinary writers, like Roald Dahl and Dav Pilkey, the creator of Captain Underpants. It's important to know that you're dyslexic - it helps you to understand why some things come naturally and others are much harder.

5 FACTS TO EXPLAIN:
Visit our kids page to find out more!

Grab a copy of 'Xtraordinary People' to read together!

This brilliant book will help you understand the 7 'Xtraordinary' strengths that come with dyslexia. It's a brilliant way to explain dyslexia to all kids.

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What is dyslexia? Dyslexic brains process information differently. This results in a pattern of strengths, like problem solving, creative thinking and seeing the big picture. Plus, challenges like spelling, reading, writing and rote learning. Knowing how to spot, support and empower dyslexic thinking can transform the life of any dyslexic child.

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Based on the 5 point scale - Download click the link below

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The positives of ADHD are numerous and mighty - creativity, empathy, and tenacity, just to name a few. Here, readers share their amazing superpowers.

Thinking positive to find the plus sides of adhd.

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Problem solving skills are a positive about ADHD.

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Children use their creativity to build a fort.

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A teenager consoles a friend, using her gift of compassion.

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Girl with snorkel by family unpacking van shows her sense of humor.

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The word impossible is written on a chalkboard, with the "im" crossed out, because those with ADHD have perseverance.

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A woman is very observant and employs her keen sense of observation.

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A mom holds her child while also ironing - multitasking is a strength for those with ADHD.

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A man is very focused on writing in his notebook. Hyperfocus is a positive trait of ADHD.

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A group of young children are running with endless energy, another positive trait of ADHD.

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A father and son play airplane together. Their seal for life is an ADHD superpower.

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A green apple in a group of oranges illustrates differences. Kids and adults with ADHD are very accepting.

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A road sign has an arrow pointing to Right and another toward wrong. Those with ADHD have a strong moral compass.

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More Articles Recommended For You

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Faster than a speeding bike! Able to leap stereotypes in a single bound! We asked readers what made them a notch above the rest. These are their answers.

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This social story explains the social expectations involved in using a public restroom, including use of a stall and use of a urinal.

This single page is designed to be enlarged on a copier and made into a booklet.

These skills take practice and time to master, and patient instruction, so keep a change of clothes handy.

Please use this tool with sensitivity and privacy.

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﻿These social stories are designed to be enlarged on a copier and made into booklets, with one image per page. Feel free to customize them for your own child's needs. ﻿

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What is ADHD?

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects behaviour and concentration.

Children and young people with ADHD often seem unusually restless, impulsive or distracted. They may speak or act without thinking, struggle with organisation, find it hard to focus or appear to be always on the go. Some people with ADHD do not experience hyperactivity; this used to be called attention deficit disorder (ADD), though the term in no longer used officially.

ADHD is not a mental illness or a learning disability, though children and young people with ADHD may also have other conditions or experience mental health problems.

Living with ADHD can be very challenging, for children and young people as well as for their parents and carers. But the right diagnosis, treatment and support can make a big difference to a child's learning, life skills and relationships, as well as making family life easier. There is also lots you can do as a parent/carer to help your child manage the things they find difficult.

What are the most common symptoms of ADHD?

A child with ADHD may be:

easily distracted, finding it difficult to start or finish tasks

often unable to concentrate

often restless or fidgety

very talkative, often interrupting or blurting things out

impulsive, acting before considering consequences, prone to taking risks

easily angry or frustrated, struggling to deal with emotions

finding making or maintaining friendships difficult

disorganised, for instance often losing things or being late

lacking awareness of time

Every child or young person with ADHD is individual and they may not display all of these behaviours. And many of these traits and behaviours are typical in younger children, or can follow a traumatic experience - they don't necessarily mean your child has ADHD.

Age and gender can also affect how someone with ADHD behaves. This can make it harder to spot signs of ADHD, particularly in girls, who are more likely to be undiagnosed or wrongly diagnosed with other conditions.

Typically the symptoms of ADHD develop in early childhood and they may become particularly noticeable at times of significant change, such as starting or changing school.

What to do if you think your child might have ADHD

If your child frequently experiences some of these symptoms and it's affecting their day-to-day life, discuss your concerns with your child's GP. Before doing this, talk to your child's teacher and the school special educational needs co-ordinator (SENCO) about what they have noticed.

The GP may want to refer your child for assessment, as ADHD can only be diagnosed by a specialist such as a child and adolescent psychiatrist or paediatrician.

Sometimes parents are reluctant to pursue assessment. They may be worried about 'labelling' their child or about stigma, or they may prefer to watch and wait. These feelings are normal. But parents and young people who do seek diagnosis can find it helps them access the right support; understand and manage challenges; and identify individual strengths.

We have more information about getting support from the GP, CAMHS or school in our guide.

ADHD diagnosis, support and treatment

ADHD assessment is usually done through the specialist Children and Young People's Mental Health Services, commonly referred to as CAMHS.

Diagnosis is most commonly made in childhood, and in the majority of cases, symptoms affecting daily life continue into adulthood.

There is no single, definitive test for ADHD. Specialists will base clinical diagnosis on a combination of observations of your child; discussions and questionnaires (with you and your child); and information from your child's school.

They will consider how long the symptoms have been present; their impact on your child's daily life; and whether they might be due to another condition. The NHS states that approximately 60-80% of children with ADHD have at least one other condition (such as autism, dyslexia, dyspraxia, anxiety or behaviour problems), and your child may be given more than one diagnosis.

Support and treatment options

You and your child should be offered support and advice to help manage ADHD in their day-to-day life.

ADHD can also be treated with medication and/or therapies. These should be discussed with you when your child is diagnosed, and are set out in the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) guidelines on ADHD.

ADHD can be treated with therapies such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT). For more information about therapy, see our parent guide to counselling and therapy.

There are a number of types of medication. These are not a cure for ADHD, and many children do not take them, but they can help manage some of the symptoms. Medication must be prescribed and overseen by a specialist.

You may also be offered ADHD -focussed parent training. This does not mean your parenting is somehow wrong. It is designed to provide support and specific strategies and skills to help you and your child thrive.

Jack is still perennially late, disorganised and impulsive; but he's also energetic, original and creative. The medication is helping him make the most of all of that.

What you can do to support your child with ADHD

Be explicit and consistent about unacceptable behaviour, such as violence. Set appropriate consequences and follow them through, but try to stay calm in the moment to avoid escalation. Dealing with challenging behaviour can be very hard, and our parent guide has helpful advice.

Plan the day so your child knows what to expect. Maintaining regular sleep patterns, physical activity and mealtimes can help your child. Some people find dietary change and/or certain supplements helpful. But the NHS states that there is no clinical evidence for this, and medical advice should be sought first. Our young person's guide has helpful advice on sleep problems.

The impact of ADHD on your child's mental health

Any child or young person can struggle with their mental health and wellbeing, whether or not they have ADHD. This might be caused by things like family change, bullying, exam stress or a traumatic event.

But having ADHD may also mean your child has extra challenges - such as social difficulties, struggling to manage their emotions or getting into trouble at school - that leave them more vulnerable to low self-esteem, anxiety or depression.

Children and young people with ADHD frequently have other developmental or mental health conditions and it is important to ensure they have the appropriate support for these.

As a parent there is a lot you can do to support your child with their wellbeing and mental health:

encourage your child to talk about how they are feeling with you. Our starting a conversation guide has ideas for keeping communication open

if you feel your child may have a mental health problem or another condition alongside ADHD, discuss your concerns with their GP or ADHD specialist.

Working with school if your child has ADHD

ADHD is a special education need (SEN), and it may be referred to as a specific learning difference (SpLD). Your child is entitled to appropriate support to help them thrive socially and educationally. This could include potential adjustments in certain situations, such as extra time or rest breaks for exams, movement breaks in lessons, written instructions for tasks and a seating plan that minimises distractions.

Discuss the diagnosis and needs with the school's SENCO, taking a list of your concerns and background information to the meeting.

Your child may be entitled to an education, health and care plan (EHC plan) which details the support they need and how it will be provided. (The National Autistic Society has helpful information about EHC plans.)

Good communication between you and school can be really helpful in ensuring your child thrives in education and meets their potential. Our parent guide to support has more advice on talking to school or college.

ADHD in teenagers and beyond

If your child is a teenager or young person, their needs and the support you give may well be different from when they were younger. They may like to read our young person's guide to ADHD and mental health. But there are still many ways you can help.

Looking after your own wellbeing

Parenting a child with ADHD can sometimes be isolating, upsetting or exhausting. Sometimes parents feel judged or blamed by others (unjustifiably as parenting does not cause ADHD). It is entirely understandable if you are finding things difficult.

It's important to recognise the impact the situation is having on you, and think about ways you can take care of yourself - including getting support from other people so that you can take some time off. It's okay to ask for help when you need it, and to share your worries with someone you trust. We have advice on looking after yourself as well as your child.

Our son's challenging behaviour with ADHD had an enormous impact on the whole family, as we and his brothers bore the brunt of his anger.

Where to get further support

If you would to speak to a professional adviser or find out more about how you can support your child, these organisations can help.
While we take care to ensure that the organisations we signpost to provide high quality information and advice, we cannot take responsibility for any specific pieces of advice they may offer. We encourage parents and carers to always explore the website of a linked service or organisation to understand who they are and what support they offer before engaging with them.

This page was reviewed in March 2022. It was created with parents and carers with lived experience of supporting their child or young person with ADHD. We will next review the page in 2025. YoungMinds is a proud member of PIF TICK - the UK's quality mark for trusted health information.
Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.

Please be aware that this form isn't a mental health support service. If your child is in crisis right now and you want to talk to someone urgently, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.

At YoungMinds we take your privacy seriously. If you'd like to read more about how we keep the information we collect safe, take a look at our privacy policy.

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ADHD Support For Your Child | Parents Advice Guide

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If your child is struggling to manage their ADHD, read our tips on what you can do to support them, how to get a diagnosis and where to find help.

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The ADHD Foundation Neurodiversity Charity - an integrated health and education service.

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Herefordshire and Worcestershire Health and Care NHS Trust

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Herefordshire and Worcestershire Health and Care NHS Trust

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Resources for Children's Speech and Language

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Children's Speech and Language resources to download

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Welcome to ictgames. Here you'll find free to play educational games aimed at children between 5 and 8 years old; written by a UK teacher with 20 years experience. The games are linked to the UK KS 1 and 2 curricula. Here are some help videos to get you started.

&nbsp Number - number and place value

&nbsp Number - addition & subtraction

&nbsp Number - multiplication & division

&nbsp Geometry - properties of shapes

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Free educational games aimed at children between 5 and 8 years old. Made by a UK teacher with 20 years of experience in education.

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Many children struggle with learning disabilities that can hinder their ability to process and understand information. Dyscalculia is a developmental disorder that involves difficulty conceptualizing and performing mathematics. The following are several practical ways that parents can help a child who struggles with dyscalculia.

Play With Dominoes
Playing games that use dominoes can help a child more easily understand simple math concepts. Specialist Ronit Bird states that a child should learn to recognize the number patterns on the dominoes and dice instead of counting the individual dots each time. Start by using dominoes and dice by themselves so your child feels comfortable with these objects. Next, find a game your child enjoys that uses these items.

Resist Using Worksheets
Whenever possible, parents should play games with their children to reinforce math facts instead of relying on worksheets. Games are almost always more interesting for kids. They present math as fun challenges to solve instead of boring concepts to memorize. If worksheets are used, it may be necessary to highlight important numbers in the instructions and throughout various problems. Allow your child to use a variety of colored pencils when completing worksheets, as it may help them more easily organize their work.

Use Manipulatives
Seeing and handling a tangible object will help a child better understand the abstract principles of mathematics. Legos and simple blocks can be used to teach addition and subtraction. TheSchoolRun.com suggests using a counter when working with children. Actually covering a certain number of counters with your hands will enable your child to more easily visualize different groups of numbers.

Learn the Language of Math
Parents should encourage their child to talk out loud as they work through a problem or new math concept. Children who struggle with math may have good language skills that could help make the mathematical process easier. It's a good idea for children to learn several synonyms for a variety of math terms. For example, when discussing addition problems they could use terms such as "plus," "increase" and "more than." Explain basic terms to your child and allow them to talk about each definition, describing what it means in their own words.

Create Visual Models
While this is similar to using manipulatives, creating visual models can expand beyond working with basic handheld objects. Understood.org advises moving around large objects in a room or drawing pictures to vividly explain aspects of math problems. Even simple household objects such as different colored socks or pairs of shoes can be used to teach addition and subtraction.

Use Accommodations
Accommodations can include everything from circling keywords in math sentences to giving your child extra paper to work out math problems. You should also discuss with your child's teacher accommodations that can be implemented at school. A few include extra time given for tests and access to a math resource room if one is available. The school may also allow a child with dyscalculia to use a calculator when working on daily math problems as well as tests.

Teach Toward Understanding
While learning math can be broken into sections, it's always a good idea to have the end goal in mind. Memorizing facts -- such as multiplication tables -- is a good idea, but simply memorizing facts won't always lead to real understanding of a math concept or process. Start by instructing your child to reason through a problem using logic instead of rote memorization. It's also a good idea to memorize a few basic strategies that have wide application.

While each one of these strategies may not work with every child, finding even a few that do will likely go a long way in helping a child build their math skills. It's important for parents to acknowledge the struggles and praise the progress that's achieved with each new skill that their child masters.

Contact us today to schedule an assessment. You can also view the research and results of the program on the website.

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7 Practical Ways Parents Can Help a Child with Dyscalculia

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Many children struggle to process and understand information. Dyscalculia is the difficulty of conceptualizing & performing math. Here are 7 ways to help!

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Help yourself to help others

If a fear of maths has you hiding from homework, we can help!

With a little help from us you can build your number confidence and skills, and begin to feel more prepared for when children come to you for help, and help pass your confidence onto them.

The free National Numeracy Challenge is designed to help you! It's a free, quick and easy way to check your skills and confidence with numbers, where you can go at your own pace, with learning resources tailored to you and your level. It helps with the maths we come across at work and in daily life - not algebra, or trigonometry. You can get started in just 10 minutes, and join the 390,000 others that have already started their journey to number confidence. Give it a go!

Family Maths Toolkit

All of our 230+ Family Maths Toolkit resources are now available for free!

To help us understand who is using them and how many children we're helping all you have to do is provide a few details, then you can access all the activities at your leisure.

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Supporting Children with Maths | Maths for Children

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Children need to feel confident with numbers, and you can help even if you don't feel confident either. Get our activities and start improving together or individually.

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Phonics Bloom create interactive online phonics games to help teach children the relationship between letters and sounds and develop the skills needed to read and write. All our resources are designed by an experienced team of teachers and parents.

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Phonics Games for the Classroom and Home - Phonics Bloom

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Play a range of online phonics games, helping teach children the relationship between letters and sounds and develop the skills needed to read and write.

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Improve Your Spelling, the latest book written by Nessy founder Mike Jones, explains the rules of reading and spelling. It will help teachers teach, and parents to understand how to help their children.

By the end, you'll be a master speller!

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You've found Nessy; World leader in helping children who learn differently. Founded and run by educators and dyslexia specialists, our award-winning programs are guided by the Science of Reading.

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Free eBook library | Oxford Owl from Oxford University Press

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Browse our library of free children’s eBooks to read with your child including Oxford Reading Tree adventures with Biff, Chip and Kipper.

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Parents and families | National Literacy Trust

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Our parent-facing site Words for Life provides milestones, tips, fun resources and advice to help parents support their children’s literacy development.

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Once Upon a Picture - Images to Inspire - Teaching Resources

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All of our children are expected to make predictions while reading. Here's a look at the curriculum objectives:

KS1: Predict what might happen on the basis of what has happened so far
KS2: Predict what might happen from details stated and implied

So, this can be as simple as asking the question, 'What do you think is going to happen next?', quickly followed with, 'Why?'.

However, we need to make explicit the additional skills needed to be able to do this. To be able to predict, you need to be able to read and understand what has happened, and is currently happening. You need to be able to retrieve and infer ('details stated and implied'), combine this with your knowledge of the world, weigh up probability, and make a sensible prediction of the next outcome. It might come naturally to many, but it's worth breaking it down to look at what's involved.

I've selected these images because they are 'in the heart of the action'. They allow for discussion around what has just happened, to use inference to work out additional information, and then a discussion of what might happen next. Here's a useful resource (aimed at Upper Key Stage 2, but could be used with children of all ages to introduce the language) for thinking about possibilities: Making predictions - modal verbs and adverbs. After teaching children how to predict, and how to answer questions, move them on to doing this with text.

When teaching prediction, it really does come back to the simple question:
What do you think is going to happen next, and why?
Just remember what else is needed to answer that question.
Note: In SATs papers, this question will come in several forms, such as, 'Will Taylor change his behaviour on future visits to the field?' or, 'Based on what you have read, what does the last paragraph suggest might happen to the explorers next? Use evidence from this paragraph to support your prediction.'

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The Prediction Collection - Once Upon a Picture

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All of our children are expected to make predictions while reading. Here's a look at the curriculum objectives: KS1: Predict what might happen on the basis of what has happened so far KS2: Predict what might happen from details stated and implied So, this can be as simple as asking the question, 'What do you think is going to happen next?', quickly followed with, 'Why?'.

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Free Text to Speech Online with Realistic AI Voices

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This page contains affiliate links, read the disclosure statement Inside: Kid tested strategies used by child therapists for calming anxiety, including ideas to calm down, books to read and videos that can help
It's happening again. Your daughter is frustrated and stomping away down to her room, slamming the door and in general "has her cranky pants on". You say calm down, but she yells back "I don't know how to do that!!!"

We tend to tell our kids to "calm down" without ever giving them explicit directions on how to deal with stress and anxiety. Here's a collection of the best tools and tips I've found to teach children how to calm down and relax.

Sometimes you'll need a quick way to help your child calm down and you don't have much with you. Maybe it's when you're out at Target or stuck in traffic. These tips will come in handy at those times:

Imagine your favorite place - it's like taking a mini vacation wherever you are

Think of your favorite things

Name animals alphabetically (alligator, bear, cow, dog, etc...)

Squeeze Something (play dough, clay, silly putty, your fists, a stress ball)

Get a Cold Drink of Water

54321 Grounding - go through each of your 5 senses

Put your arms straight out in front of you, palms facing out.

Put one hand over the other at the wrists and interlace your fingers.

Swoop your hands and arms toward your body and then place your interlaced hands on your chest.

Cross your feet at the ankles and put your tongue on the roof of your mouth.

Stay still for one minute.

It's great to have a big list of coping skills to try when your child needs to calm down. Here are two more short lists of ideas for calming down at home or at school.

From Imperfect Families - Strategies to use at home

From Encourage Play - 10 Strategies to Help Kids Calm Down at school or home

People usually roll their eyes initially when they hear "breathing is important". But I will continue to say it and explain why. It's so simple, yet has such a big impact on your body's physiology.

When you and calm and relaxed, your body is in "rest and digest" mode. You breathe normally, your heart rate is lower and your muscles are relaxed. However, when stress or anxiety or anger occurs, your body automatically switches into "flight, fight or freeze" mode. Your muscles tense up, your heart rate increases and your breathing becomes more shallow.

Taking deep breaths, instead of shallow breaths, is one way to tell your body to get back to resting and digesting. That's why deep breathing is important!

Luckily, there are some fun ways to teach kids deep breathing techniques

Things to use

Things to say

Breathe in like you are smelling a flower, breathe out like you are blowing out birthday candles

Arms up and breathe in, arms down and breathe out

Pretend your belly is a balloon. Breathe in and make the balloon bigger, then breathe out and make the balloon shrink.

Videos to watch
4 - 7 - 8 Breathing by GoZen
Breathing at Sea Otter Cove from Stress Free Kids

A Coping Skills Toolbox is a kit that you create to help your child calm down when they are upset, anxious or worried. In order to get the most benefit from this, you should create this kit before an issue occurs. When your child experiences anxiety, then they can pick out an item from their Coping Skills Toolbox. This is one of my favorite ways to help kids learn to calm their anxiety.

Here are some other fantastic ideas for what to put in a coping skills toolbox/calm down kit from And Next Comes L

You can create a place specially designed to allow to calm down in a few steps

Find a spot and make it cozy (ask your child for help with that - maybe they can place a favorite blanket or stuffed animal inside)

Add calming tools

Explain how to use it and practice before

When they are starting to escalate, catch it early and give them a calm reminder about their calm down spot

Use the following phrases as a way to support your child, let them know that you're going to support them and help them in any way that you can.

"I'm here for you"

"Talk to me and tell me what's going on"

"How can I help?"

"Together, we can work on this. We're a great team"

"I love you"

"Do you want a hug?"

Here are some more ideas of what to say to calm an anxious child.

From Go Zen - 49 Phrases to Calm an Anxious Child

From Lemon Lime Adventures - What to Say to Calm an Anxious Child

Did you know there are podcasts with stories for children? Usually the hosts have a soothing voice and the stories tend to be pretty short. Your child can listen to these podcasts as a way to have some down time.

There are scripts you can read to your child to help them relax and calm down. Slowly and carefully read the words as your child listens and follows the instructions. Check out Inner Health Studios list of scripts you can use with your child. If you prefer not to read a script, there are ones that are pre-recorded.

There are also scripts to practice mindfulness with children. Eline Snel has written a great book on Mindfulness with Kids, Sitting Still Like a Frog. Here are the several scripts that can be used from that book!

Annaka Harris also has several pre-recorded scripts to help kids practice mindfulness

Confused about how to introduce mindfulness to kids? Check out these resources:
Simple Ways to Introduce Mindfulness and Meditation to Children 11 Simple But Effective Ways to Teach Mindfulness to Kids
What you need:

I've used empty soda bottles, empty water bottles, glass jars and plastic containers. Use whatever makes sense for you and your family. For instance, for the calming jars the kids have in their room, I used a heavy duty plastic bottle. I didn't want them to accidentally knock over a glass jar in the dark - that would be a huge mess!

I've had the best results when I've used warm water - it makes it easier for the water and paint to combine.
Glitter Paint
I prefer using glitter paint (or glitter glue) instead of glitter because then I'm not cleaning up glitter for weeks at my house after we make them :-)

To make your jar, add glitter paint to the bottom of the jar until it just covers the bottom of it. Add warm water. Put the cover on and shake to help the ingredients combine. Once you are satisfied with the look of your jar, then you can super glue the lid shut so it doesn't spill. In a pinch, I've also used duct tape to secure the lid.
Watch Make a Simple Calming Jar from Coping Skills for Kids on YouTube Wet Ingredients
Sometimes you want the glitter/other items to stay afloat longer or for a shorter amount of time. Here are some different ingredients you can use as the wet ingredients.
Dry Ingredients
To see several other ways to make calming jars, take a look at what Preschool Inspirations did.

One of the first things I always like to do with kids if they are struggling is to start using visuals. When you're stressed and anxious, it's harder to read and take in information. Visuals are easier.

I like to keep calming cue cards in my children's coping skills toolboxes so that they can make a decision about what coping skill they can use. Sometimes pulling out a list is too much in the moment. You can make your own cue cards.

Take several index cards or small pieces of cardstock

On each one, write or draw one coping skill

Hole punch the cards and place them on a keyring (to make them extra sturdy, you can laminate them)

Put them into the coping skills toolbox for easy access

Using visuals is a powerful way to help kids. When kids are overwhelmed, sometimes it's hard for them to figure out what to do. By having cue cards, your child can have a visual reminder of what calms and relaxes them.

To make things a little easier, I've created ready to use coping skills cue cardsfor you. There are four different sets: Calming, Physical, Distracting, and Processing. If you'd like all 4, I created a set where you can download them all together.

If your child is anxious, they may also be having a difficult time getting settled for bedtime. Here are some ideas to help your child get settled at bedtime.

PINPOINT WHAT THE FEAR IS

One of the most important things to do is to figure out exactly what is causing the anxiety. Is it fear of the dark? Is it a worry about something in the closet? Is it monsters? Is it spiders? Figuring out the cause of the fear will help you come up with ways you can help your child combat it.

REARRANGE THE ROOM

Are there particular spots of the room that seem to be darker or cause more fear at night than others? Go into the bedroom during the day with your child and talk about the spots that make your child nervous. Try moving night lights and furniture around for a more calming room arrangement.

TRANSITIONAL OBJECTS

If your child has a hard time separating from you, try a transitional object. This is a special item that helps your child feel comforted. It helps them feel like part of you is still present even when you're not there. It could be something like a stuffed animal or a special stone or necklace, or a sweatshirt of yours. The object isn't what matters, it's what the object represents. They can keep it and hold it all night long to help them relax and go to sleep.

Find more strategies here: 12 Kid Friendly Strategies to Calm Anxiety at Night

Looking for some calming guided meditation to help get to sleep at night? Try one of these: Best Guided Meditations for Sleep.

Whenever I sit down and talk with someone about their coping skills, one of the first
things I ask is if they have tried writing about it. Why do I always start with journaling as
a way of processing through difficult feelings?

It's easier to write about than talk about hard things

Journaling helps you process what's happening.

It's convenient.

It's not graded

It can help you solve a problem

It can help you re-frame your thinking

Looking for a journal for a child or teen? Check out Big Life Journals!

General Anxiety

The Coping Skills for Kids Workbook by Janine Halloran. This book has over 75 strategies for kids to try to help them manage their stress and worry. This book also includes colorful worksheets to help kids learn more about their anxiety and what they can do to manage their stress.

Wilma Jean the Worry Machine by Julia Cook I love that when Wilma Jean's physical reactions are described, they're also illustrated. When is says she has knots in her stomach and her knees lock, her stomach really looks like it's tied in a knot and there's a real lock around her knees. I love the activity she does with her teacher, going over worries she can control and worries she can't, it's a great way to help kids manage their anxiety.

David and the Worry Beast by Anne Marie Guanci David's anxiety is a beast, and the more anxious he gets, the bigger it grows. David learns to control his thoughts, and his beast shrinks. There's also a couple of pages for parents and kids in the back.

When My Worries Get Too Big by Kari Dunn Buron This book is wonderful! There are several pages where kids can add in their own thoughts, worries and what helps them relax. This book also uses the 5 point scale to talk about stress and different ways to manage it.

What To Do When You Worry Too Much by Dawn Huebner, PhD This book goes through several ways that can help kids manage anxiety, including setting a time for worries, thinking about things that make you happy and resetting your body with activity or relaxation. There are some interactive places in this book, where a child can write down their worries, draw some images of things that might help, etc.

What To Do When You're Scared and Worried by James J. Crist This is one of my favorite books for kids to help them deal with anxiety. Near the beginning of the book is a checklist that helps kids narrow down what they are anxious about. The beginning of the book covers the basics of what anxiety is and how to help manage with coping skills. The next section of the book goes into detail about different types of anxiety kids might experience, including Separation Anxiety, Phobias and Panic Attacks.

Separation Anxiety

The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn Classic about managing separation anxiety when kids start school. My daughter's kindergarten teacher read this on our visit to school the first day.

When I miss you by Cornelia Maude Spelman This is perfect for little ones who have a hard time dealing with the fact that they are away from their parents during the day. It suggests a couple of things they can do to help and reassurance that parents will come back at the end of the day.

Wemberley Worried by Kevin Henkes Poor Wemberley worries about everything, and then she gets really worried when she is about to start school.

This E-Course offers you instant support from a Child Therapist.
You will get:
12 Videos that are quick and bite size

14 Exercises that will expand on the skills taught

6 Cheat Sheets that will serve as a reference
Along with the course you get:
Access to the instructor for ongoing support

Downloadable PDF versions of all lessons

Lifetime access to the course

More from Coping Skills for Kids about Anxiety in Children...

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Calming Anxiety - Coping Skills for Kids

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Inside: Kid tested strategies used by child therapists for calming anxiety, including ideas to calm down, books to read and videos that can help

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Mental Health Resources For Children and Young People

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Free mental health resources, posters, lesson plans and activity sheets for primary and secondary school staff, and mental health professionals working with children and young people.

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Mental health support for parents and carers – Place2Be

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Advice and resources for parents and carers to help support their child or young person’s wellbeing.

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Parenting and mental health - Beyond Blue

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Find parenting information and resources to support mental health and wellbeing for children, young people and families.

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Hampshire Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service is an NHS specialist service, provided by Sussex Partnership NHS Foundation Trust for young people aged 5-18 years and their families who are experiencing difficulties with their mental and emotional health. Many young people experience difficulties with their mental health such as anxiety, low mood, trauma, eating difficulties plus many others which can impact on all aspects of life such as education, home life, hobbies and interests, socialising and having fun.

It is important to know that everyone has mental health and that we can all experience tough times and this can cause our mental health to suffer. CAMHS work with young people, their families and other important organisations (such as schools) to achieve the following:

* Assess and diagnose mental health and neurodevelopmental difficulties
* Identify realistic goals or changes
* Identify and build on strengths
* Improve self-esteem and confidence to cope with difficulties
* Learn emotional coping techniques to help manage difficult or upsetting thoughts, feelings, urges or experiences
* Empower the young person to identify, express and communicate their needs, take responsibility for their health and wellbeing and feel confident in knowing where and how to get additional support if necessary
Hampshire CAMHS Thresholds
We cannot "cure" mental health difficulties or prevent difficulties ever coming back. Lots of things can impact on our mental health, some of which are beyond anyone's control. Instead we work with you to help you learn how to manage your difficulties and in many cases overcoming them is absolutely possible. There may also be some difficulties or experiences which CAMHS are not able to provide support for. In these cases we will help you access appropriate help from other organisations and services such as drug and alcohol services and bereavement services plus many others.

You will need to be willing and committed to attending sessions that are offered as well as trying and practising techniques until you find what works well for you. You will need to be prepared to work with us in this way so that you have the best chance of achieving your goals/recovery.

Overcoming difficulties also depends on how much an individual would like to change. Often change can be scary and many young people feel they don't have the energy or the motivation to change or try different things. If you have made the step of asking for help and attending an assessment and are committed to making changes, we will work with you to help you achieve your goals/recovery.

Anyone can help you get an appointment at Hampshire Specialist CAMHS; you, your parents or carers, your teachers, a health professional (such as a school nurse or GP) or a social worker, using our online referral form which you can complete and submit online. You can also call Hampshire CAMHS on 0300 304 0050 (Monday - Friday, 9am-5pm).

If you are experiencing difficulties, it is really important to talk to those around you so that they can support you with these and with getting the right help and support.

We would recommend talking to CAMHS before making a referral so that we can offer advice and guidance and to decide whether CAMHS is the right service to meet your needs. CAMHS may also be able to offer recommendations about other services, organisations and things that may be helpful.

If after receiving a referral it is agreed that it would be helpful for CAMHS to offer an appointment, you will be given a date as soon as possible. Please be aware that there may be a wait for an appointment. If you feel that things are becoming more difficult or more urgent whilst you are waiting for appointment, please contact the Single Point of Access for CAMHS on 0300 304 0050 to let us know.

* At your first appointment we'll start with introductions and outline what will happen during the appointment. Your first appointment may be by telephone or face to face
* We'll ask you to fill in some questionnaires. These help us to understand your strengths and any difficulties you might be experiencing
* Your clinician will also talk to you about confidentiality and consent to share information
* The aim of your first appointment is to find out what your goals are and what you would like to be different
* By the end of the appointment we will decide together the best way forward in order to help you reach your goals/recovery
* If you have any questions, worries or concerns please speak to your clinician - we're all here to listen and to help, your initial appointment is a chance to discuss what is currently going on for you.

We have a leaflet entitled 'About your CAMHS appointment' which you can download here.

This leaflet clearly explains what to do if you have difficulties getting to appointments, it may address other questions you may have and also explains our appointment policy.

We understand that there are lots of reasons why you might not want information shared with your young person's school. We will want to understand those reasons so that we can make sure you still receive the help and support you might need.

There are some situations when we will need to share information with others. If your young person or someone they know are being harmed or are at risk of harm, we have a duty to protect anyone from harm so we will find a way together to share information in an appropriate way. We will include you in all discussions as much as possible when sharing information is involved.

If you are worried about information being shared please speak to your clinician about this so you can agree a way forward together.

* Following your first appointment, if it is agreed that CAMHS can help you a number of things may happen
* You may be offered a group to attend. We know that for some that groups with other people experiencing similar difficulties are the best support. These will be run by our experienced clinicians
* You may be offered a further period of assessment and intervention by one of our clinicians. They will contact you to arrange this.

This will depend on many factors including the type of difficulties you are experiencing and your goals. There will be regular reviews of how things are progressing and discussions with you and your family about the care we provide. At CAMHS we aim to empower young people to learn and develop skills to help themselves cope and work towards their goals.

Sessions usually last between 50 minutes and one hour. Some sessions are longer depending on the therapy approach being used. You can use as much or as little of your session time as you want.

No, not everyone that comes to CAMHS is prescribed medication. Medication can be helpful for some young people depending on what difficulties they are experiencing. If you have any questions or worries about medication, you can ask your clinician.

You might also find useful information and guidance about psychiatric medication on this website: www.headmeds.org.uk

If there is an emergency and you or someone else is at risk of serious harm, call 999 immediately and tell anyone else who may be near you so they can help.

If your young person is in crisis and you do not know what to do, click here.

If it is not an emergency, encourage your young person to find someone to talk to; a parent/ carer or family member, friend or partner, or call the helpline. If you already see someone at CAMHS, you can call after the weekend or the next day to speak with them or someone else in the team.

We know that when people finish their work with us and are discharged (closed) from our service, people can worry that they might not cope. It is important that if you are working with CAMHS that you complete a relapse prevention plan before you finish. It is important to keep this and follow the plan if you are struggling.

You can use the self-help pages of this website to remind yourself of the top tips to help you cope and access extra self-help information and advice. The most important thing to do is to let a parent/carer, teacher or trusted adult know that you are struggling so that they can support you.

Young people can sometimes be re-referred to CAMHS if this is agreed this would be the most helpful thing to do.

Yes!
* Specialist Eating Disorder Team
This team covers the whole of Hampshire and works with young people who have eating disorders and difficulties and their families. Our aim is to see young people as quickly as possible and provide specialist treatment. The team also provides information and guidance for anyone who might be concerned about an eating difficulty. The Specialist Eating Disorder Team can be contacted Monday-Friday 9-5pm on 0300 304 0062.
* i2i (Urgent Assessment and Home Treatment Team)
Our i2i team provide specialist intensive assessment and treatment to young people who are experiencing crisis or who require extra care to try to prevent crises from happening. This service can only be accessed by young people already coming to CAMHS and who have been referred by their CAMHS worker. The team provide urgent assessments and help develop care plans with you, your family, the CAMHS team, school and other agencies (where needed) that aim to keep young people as safe as possible.
* Learning Disability Care
Hampshire CAMHS also offer their services to children and young people with a learning disability, making sure that young people with a learning disability who also have a mental health difficulty can get the help and support they need. Every team in Hampshire CAMHS has a specialist learning disability CAMHS worker who can offer a range of approaches depending on each person's needs. One of the main approaches used is Positive Behaviour Support. This is an approach to support children and young people when they have behaviours that can be challenging.

We work together to find out why a behaviour may occur, including triggers and outcomes. This helps us to think of strategies to help a young person manage their feelings and helps parents or carers to respond in helpful ways.

Further information can be found at: www.challengingbehaviour.org.uk
* Youth Offending Team and Forensic CAMHS
The Youth Offending Team (YOT) is a service provided by Children's Services for young people who are involved in the Criminal Justice System. CAMHS provides specialist assessments and ways to help young people who have been involved in crime and are working with YOT. These CAMHS clinicians work within the YOT teams and alongside the YOT workers.

Forensic CAMHS is a specialist service for young people who experience a mental health difficulty and who may pose a risk to themselves or others. CAMHS workers in this team provide training, and advice and consultation to other professionals as well as specialist assessments and work with the young person and their family. The Clinicians in this team work closely with children's services, schools, the Police and other relevant organisations to ensure the health, wellbeing and safety of the young person and those around them

What do certain words mean? Read our Glossary.

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It's normal for children and young people to feel worried about something that's happening at school - for example, when starting a new school or during exams. Sometimes, however, school can become challenging, stressful or distressing over a much longer period of time.

If your child is feeling anxious about school, or not able to go, it can be exhausting for both of you. Mornings in particular can become really stressful for the whole family, as you try to juggle your child's feelings alongside the need to get them to school and get on with your other responsibilities such as work. Even if you manage to get your child to the school gate, you might know how difficult they're going to find the day - or know that you'll be facing the same problem tomorrow morning.

If you're in this situation, we've got advice to help you explore what's going on with your child, make changes at school that can help, and find the support you need if your child can't go to school.

About the term 'school refusal'

When anxiety builds up to the point that a young person cannot go to school, this is often called 'school refusal' - and you might hear the school or other professionals using this term. However, many young people and parents do not like this term because it implies that 'refusing' school is a choice, and you may prefer to use terms such as emotionally-based school avoidance (ESBA) or anxiety-related absence.

What makes young people feel anxious about school?

Young people can feel anxious about school for lots of different reasons. They might be worried about making friends or fitting in, find schoolwork or lessons confusing, feel pressured to learn in a certain way or find their relationships with teachers difficult.

Sometimes, going through difficult experiences outside of school - such as bereavement, an illness in the family or being a young carer - can also make it harder for a child to feel settled at school.

For some young people, the school environment isn't right for them, and trying to fit into it can create a huge amount of stress. This might be the case if they are struggling with their mental health, or have a neurodiverse condition or Special Educational Need (SEN) such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia or dyspraxia. This can make the school environment anxiety-provoking and exhausting, especially if their condition or need is undiagnosed or not being well supported.

Young people might show they're feeling anxious about school by:

not wanting to get up and get ready

saying they can't go

worrying a lot about small issues, such as having the right equipment for a lesson

feeling sick, or having stomach aches or headaches

not sleeping well

not doing schoolwork, or their grades dropping

being angry or upset, or acting out - at school or at home

withdrawing - seeming low, quiet or depressed

Finding out what's going on for your child

Sometimes it can be difficult to work out what's making your child feel anxious, and the first step is often helping them to identify exactly what's worrying them. Once you understand the problem, you'll be in a much better position to make changes that can help.

Young people can find it hard to explain what's causing their feelings, and might not be able to answer direct questions like 'what's going on?' Using an anxiety iceberg can help to open up the conversation - giving you a more relaxed way of exploring together what's causing their anxiety.

Watch our video to find out how to make an anxiety iceberg with your child.

If you're making an anxiety iceberg with younger children, you might want to draw images on the iceberg, or encourage them to write simple words. With older children and teenagers, you can ask them to write key words and phrases on the iceberg, or do this as a mind map, with 'school' in the middle and all the things they're finding difficult around the outside.

Through this exercise, you might identify worries such as arriving at school, finding the environment noisy or overwhelming, finding lessons confusing, feeling lonely through the day, or feeling uncomfortable during specific subjects.

Making changes at school

Once you understand what's going on for your child, you can use their anxiety iceberg or mind map to communicate with the school and ask for specific changes.

Follow these steps to start a conversation with the school:

Here are some examples of things you can ask the school for:

Remember that even though this situation can be really tough for you and your child, it's a good idea to maintain a positive relationship with the school. Recognise the support they're offering and any changes they're making. This will help you work together to make things better for your child.

Building a relationship with the attendance team at my son's school was hugely helpful, we were talking with them each day.

Strategies you can try at home

For more information and advice on managing anxiety, have a look at our guide for parents.

If your child isn't able to go to school at the moment

If your child isn't going to school at the moment, this can be incredibly stressful and exhausting for you - and really tough for your child. You might be worried about whether they will be able to get back to school or the impact on their education. Or, you might feel overwhelmed because you're juggling this alongside work and other family commitments.

If your child's anxiety about school has built up to the point where they can't go, it's a good idea to get them some professional mental health or SEN support - see our advice on this below.

Alongside requesting professional help, try to:

The school's SEN and attendance policies should be on their website. Knowing what these are can support you during meetings with the school.

This can help if your child is unable to go to school for a longer period of time and you need to ask for more support, including provision of alternative full-time education.

Encourage your child to get up, do some studying and stop for lunch at the same times they would if they were in school. This will make adapting back to school easier. Explain to your child that if they cannot go to school, they will need to study at home - at least until alternative arrangements are put in place. Ask the school to help you facilitate tasks and activities your child can do and use online resources such as BBC Bitesize.

Not going to school could leave your child feeling really isolated. Make sure they stay connected to the outside world by seeing friends and family, doing activities they enjoy and getting outside for walks and exercise.

Speaking to friends online can be really important if your child is feeling isolated at home. Sometimes, however, you might notice that your child is spending lots of time gaming or on their phone, and that this is getting in the way of important daily activities like spending quality time with family, learning, or sleeping and eating well. If this is becoming a problem, have a look at our guide to gaming or guide to social media for more information and advice.

Local authorities must provide alternative education if a child of compulsory school age is unable to attend school over a longer period of time. If your child cannot attend school because of a mental or physical health issue, the local authority should provide an alternative as soon as it is clear that they will be away from school for more than 15 days (either consecutively or over time). Find out how to request alternative education.

What will happen if my child doesn't go to school?

Parents often tell us they are worried about fines and prosecution, but schools generally consider this only if they feel there is no valid reason for the absence, or that parents aren't engaging with the problem.

If the absence is prolonged, the case may be referred to a local council Education Welfare Officer (EWO). They will arrange a home visit to find out more and discuss strategies. The school may also refer to other support, including from CAMHS.

Helping your child return to school after an absence

Getting back to school after weeks or months may feel extremely difficult for your child, but you and the school can help make it more manageable. Here are some things you can do to help:

Set small, achievable targets, such as visiting the building outside school hours or attending one lesson.

Request a home visit from a school staff member so your child can check in while feeling safe, see that the school cares and discuss any strategies that might help them.

Ask for a reduced timetable, with regular reviews to discuss building back up at a manageable rate.

Discuss changing classes or sets if your child thinks this would help.

Focus on qualifications needed for what your child wants to do next, perhaps dropping a less relevant GCSE to reduce stress.

My son wasn't questioned about his absence when he did feel able to pop in for favourite lessons, helping to ease him back into full days of education.

Getting mental health and SEN support

If your child is struggling with anxiety and it's affecting their day-to-day life, learning or relationships, it's a good idea to find some professional support. Speaking to the GP and finding them a counsellor or therapist are two good places to start. You can find more information about GPs, counsellors and other mental health services in our guide to getting help for your child.

If there is no other obvious reason for your child's inability to attend school, they may have an undiagnosed Special Educational Need (SEN) such as dyslexia, autism or ADHD.

If you think this is the case:

Speak to the school's SENCO or your GP to ask for a referral for an assessment.

While you are waiting for an assessment, you can also ask the SENCO to refer your child for support from other professionals, such as an Educational Psychologist or Speech and Language Therapist. These professionals can identify specific needs and make recommendations for additional support the school can put in place - even if your child hasn't had a formal diagnosis yet.

SEN support at school
If your child is diagnosed with SEN, extra support and adjustments should be put in place at school to help them attend and learn. This is called SEN support, and should be available within the school's existing resources. Speak to the school's SENCO in the first instance about how the school will support your child.
Education, Health and Care (EHC) plans
If you do not think your child's needs can be met by the school's existing resources, you can ask the local authority to carry out an Education, Health and Care needs assessment (EHC needs assessment). If the local authority decides your child needs additional support, they will then make an Education, Health and Care plan (EHC plan). This outlines how the extra support they need will be provided. Find out more about EHC plans.
Your Local Offer
Your Local Offer is the information, support and services available for young people with SEN, and for their parents and families. You can find out what support is available in your area by going to your local authority's website and searching for their Local Offer.

If you need more information and advice about getting the right education for your child when they have been diagnosed with a Special Educational Need (SEN), IPSEA can help.

If you need to talk through a problem, their Advice Line can provide support with any educational issue resulting from your child's SEN. You can also find lots of information, including information on assessments and diagnosis, as well as getting support from the school and local authority, on their website.

Finding more information and advice

Useful helplines and websites

While we take care to ensure that the organisations we signpost to provide high quality information and advice, we cannot take responsibility for any specific pieces of advice they may offer. We encourage parents and carers to always explore the website of a linked service or organisation to understand who they are and what support they offer before engaging with them.

You might also find this helpful

We have more tips and advice on supporting your child with school, and information about how you can get in touch with our Parents Helpline.

This page was reviewed in December 2022. It was created with parents and carers with lived experience of supporting their child or young person with school anxiety. We will next review the page in 2025. YoungMinds is a proud member of PIF TICK - the UK's quality mark for trusted health information.
Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.

Please be aware that this form isn't a mental health support service. If your child is in crisis right now and you want to talk to someone urgently, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.

At YoungMinds we take your privacy seriously. If you'd like to read more about how we keep the information we collect safe, take a look at our privacy policy.

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School Anxiety and Refusal | Parent Guide to Support

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If your child is anxious about school, or refusing to go to school at all, read our tips and advice on how you can support their mental health.

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Hampshire Parent Carer Network (HPCN) offers parents and carers of children and young people aged 0-25 with any additional needs, or disability including mental Health (diagnosed or undiagnosed) the opportunity to tell the Local Authority, Health and other services, what life is really like. email participation@hpcn.org.uk or visit our page.

We Are Hiring!

We are looking for passionate and dedicated individuals to fill two exciting roles for projects we are running:

Bridging the Gap(BTG) Coordinator - BTG Job des.docx

Future in Mind (FIM) Coordinator - FIM Job Des.docx

If you are passionate about making a difference and believe you have the qualifications and experience we are looking for, we encourage you to apply.

Deadline to submit Applications : 28th June 2024

Join us in making a positive impact at HPCN. We look forward to hearing from you!

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Hampshire Parent Carer Network (HPCN) offers parents and carers of children and young people aged 0-25 with any additional needs, or disability including mental Health (diagnosed or undiagnosed) the opportunity to tell the Local Authority, Health and other services, what life is really like. email participation@hpcn.org.uk or visit our page.

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Do you need some support responding to an EHCP or a Working Document? Join one of our online clinics where we'll guide you through the process.

Impartial Special Educational Needs and Disability Information, Advice and Support (SENDIASS) in Hampshire

Hampshire SENDIASS is an impartial Special Educational Needs and Disability Information, Advice and Support Service (SENDIASS) that aims to make a positive and lasting difference for children and young people with special educational needs and/or disability (SEND) and their parents and carers. We do this by providing timely confidential, impartial information, advice and support through our online resources, at events and workshops, via our helpline service and through individual casework.

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Hampshire SENDIASS is provided by Polaris Children's Services, part of a leading Children's Services Group with over 24 years of experience in supporting children, young people and their families to build brighter futures.

Feedback

Tell us what you think by taking a quick questionnaire!

Get in Touch

If you can't find what you need, feel free to get in touch with us, our opening hours are Monday-Thursday, 9am-5pm, and on Fridays 9am-4pm . Outside of these hours please use the Contact Us Form. We aim to respond to all enquiries within 2 working days.

0808 164 5504

The Local Offer includes information about education, health, social care, preparation for adulthood, leisure services and impartial information advice and support. Hampshire's Local Offer (co produced with parents, carers and young people) aims to help you find your way through the maze of information to reach the best solutions for you/your child.

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Hampshire SENDIASS | Impartial SEND Advice & Support

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Hampshire SENDIASS provide information and support to Children & Young People with special education needs and/or a disabilities.

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Hampshire Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service is an NHS specialist service, provided by Sussex Partnership NHS Foundation Trust for young people aged 5-18 years and their families who are experiencing difficulties with their mental and emotional health. Many young people experience difficulties with their mental health such as anxiety, low mood, trauma, eating difficulties plus many others which can impact on all aspects of life such as education, home life, hobbies and interests, socialising and having fun.

It is important to know that everyone has mental health and that we can all experience tough times and this can cause our mental health to suffer. CAMHS work with young people, their families and other important organisations (such as schools) to achieve the following:

* Assess and diagnose mental health and neurodevelopmental difficulties
* Identify realistic goals or changes
* Identify and build on strengths
* Improve self-esteem and confidence to cope with difficulties
* Learn emotional coping techniques to help manage difficult or upsetting thoughts, feelings, urges or experiences
* Empower the young person to identify, express and communicate their needs, take responsibility for their health and wellbeing and feel confident in knowing where and how to get additional support if necessary
Hampshire CAMHS Thresholds
We cannot "cure" mental health difficulties or prevent difficulties ever coming back. Lots of things can impact on our mental health, some of which are beyond anyone's control. Instead we work with you to help you learn how to manage your difficulties and in many cases overcoming them is absolutely possible. There may also be some difficulties or experiences which CAMHS are not able to provide support for. In these cases we will help you access appropriate help from other organisations and services such as drug and alcohol services and bereavement services plus many others.

You will need to be willing and committed to attending sessions that are offered as well as trying and practising techniques until you find what works well for you. You will need to be prepared to work with us in this way so that you have the best chance of achieving your goals/recovery.

Overcoming difficulties also depends on how much an individual would like to change. Often change can be scary and many young people feel they don't have the energy or the motivation to change or try different things. If you have made the step of asking for help and attending an assessment and are committed to making changes, we will work with you to help you achieve your goals/recovery.

Anyone can help you get an appointment at Hampshire Specialist CAMHS; you, your parents or carers, your teachers, a health professional (such as a school nurse or GP) or a social worker, using our online referral form which you can complete and submit online. You can also call Hampshire CAMHS on 0300 304 0050 (Monday - Friday, 9am-5pm).

If you are experiencing difficulties, it is really important to talk to those around you so that they can support you with these and with getting the right help and support.

We would recommend talking to CAMHS before making a referral so that we can offer advice and guidance and to decide whether CAMHS is the right service to meet your needs. CAMHS may also be able to offer recommendations about other services, organisations and things that may be helpful.

If after receiving a referral it is agreed that it would be helpful for CAMHS to offer an appointment, you will be given a date as soon as possible. Please be aware that there may be a wait for an appointment. If you feel that things are becoming more difficult or more urgent whilst you are waiting for appointment, please contact the Single Point of Access for CAMHS on 0300 304 0050 to let us know.

* At your first appointment we'll start with introductions and outline what will happen during the appointment. Your first appointment may be by telephone or face to face
* We'll ask you to fill in some questionnaires. These help us to understand your strengths and any difficulties you might be experiencing
* Your clinician will also talk to you about confidentiality and consent to share information
* The aim of your first appointment is to find out what your goals are and what you would like to be different
* By the end of the appointment we will decide together the best way forward in order to help you reach your goals/recovery
* If you have any questions, worries or concerns please speak to your clinician - we're all here to listen and to help, your initial appointment is a chance to discuss what is currently going on for you.

We have a leaflet entitled 'About your CAMHS appointment' which you can download here.

This leaflet clearly explains what to do if you have difficulties getting to appointments, it may address other questions you may have and also explains our appointment policy.

We understand that there are lots of reasons why you might not want information shared with your young person's school. We will want to understand those reasons so that we can make sure you still receive the help and support you might need.

There are some situations when we will need to share information with others. If your young person or someone they know are being harmed or are at risk of harm, we have a duty to protect anyone from harm so we will find a way together to share information in an appropriate way. We will include you in all discussions as much as possible when sharing information is involved.

If you are worried about information being shared please speak to your clinician about this so you can agree a way forward together.

* Following your first appointment, if it is agreed that CAMHS can help you a number of things may happen
* You may be offered a group to attend. We know that for some that groups with other people experiencing similar difficulties are the best support. These will be run by our experienced clinicians
* You may be offered a further period of assessment and intervention by one of our clinicians. They will contact you to arrange this.

This will depend on many factors including the type of difficulties you are experiencing and your goals. There will be regular reviews of how things are progressing and discussions with you and your family about the care we provide. At CAMHS we aim to empower young people to learn and develop skills to help themselves cope and work towards their goals.

Sessions usually last between 50 minutes and one hour. Some sessions are longer depending on the therapy approach being used. You can use as much or as little of your session time as you want.

No, not everyone that comes to CAMHS is prescribed medication. Medication can be helpful for some young people depending on what difficulties they are experiencing. If you have any questions or worries about medication, you can ask your clinician.

You might also find useful information and guidance about psychiatric medication on this website: www.headmeds.org.uk

If there is an emergency and you or someone else is at risk of serious harm, call 999 immediately and tell anyone else who may be near you so they can help.

If your young person is in crisis and you do not know what to do, click here.

If it is not an emergency, encourage your young person to find someone to talk to; a parent/ carer or family member, friend or partner, or call the helpline. If you already see someone at CAMHS, you can call after the weekend or the next day to speak with them or someone else in the team.

We know that when people finish their work with us and are discharged (closed) from our service, people can worry that they might not cope. It is important that if you are working with CAMHS that you complete a relapse prevention plan before you finish. It is important to keep this and follow the plan if you are struggling.

You can use the self-help pages of this website to remind yourself of the top tips to help you cope and access extra self-help information and advice. The most important thing to do is to let a parent/carer, teacher or trusted adult know that you are struggling so that they can support you.

Young people can sometimes be re-referred to CAMHS if this is agreed this would be the most helpful thing to do.

Yes!
* Specialist Eating Disorder Team
This team covers the whole of Hampshire and works with young people who have eating disorders and difficulties and their families. Our aim is to see young people as quickly as possible and provide specialist treatment. The team also provides information and guidance for anyone who might be concerned about an eating difficulty. The Specialist Eating Disorder Team can be contacted Monday-Friday 9-5pm on 0300 304 0062.
* i2i (Urgent Assessment and Home Treatment Team)
Our i2i team provide specialist intensive assessment and treatment to young people who are experiencing crisis or who require extra care to try to prevent crises from happening. This service can only be accessed by young people already coming to CAMHS and who have been referred by their CAMHS worker. The team provide urgent assessments and help develop care plans with you, your family, the CAMHS team, school and other agencies (where needed) that aim to keep young people as safe as possible.
* Learning Disability Care
Hampshire CAMHS also offer their services to children and young people with a learning disability, making sure that young people with a learning disability who also have a mental health difficulty can get the help and support they need. Every team in Hampshire CAMHS has a specialist learning disability CAMHS worker who can offer a range of approaches depending on each person's needs. One of the main approaches used is Positive Behaviour Support. This is an approach to support children and young people when they have behaviours that can be challenging.

We work together to find out why a behaviour may occur, including triggers and outcomes. This helps us to think of strategies to help a young person manage their feelings and helps parents or carers to respond in helpful ways.

Further information can be found at: www.challengingbehaviour.org.uk
* Youth Offending Team and Forensic CAMHS
The Youth Offending Team (YOT) is a service provided by Children's Services for young people who are involved in the Criminal Justice System. CAMHS provides specialist assessments and ways to help young people who have been involved in crime and are working with YOT. These CAMHS clinicians work within the YOT teams and alongside the YOT workers.

Forensic CAMHS is a specialist service for young people who experience a mental health difficulty and who may pose a risk to themselves or others. CAMHS workers in this team provide training, and advice and consultation to other professionals as well as specialist assessments and work with the young person and their family. The Clinicians in this team work closely with children's services, schools, the Police and other relevant organisations to ensure the health, wellbeing and safety of the young person and those around them

What do certain words mean? Read our Glossary.

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Winston's Wish is the UK's childhood bereavement charity. We support children and their families after the death of someone important.

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Being a parent is rewarding, watching your children grow and helping them to find their independence. Parenting can also be really hard work!! In this section you will find a range of national and local services relating to family life including parenting and support services from pre-pregnancy to adulthood.

For a comprehensive list of local services click on the 'V iew all services and advice' link on the right hand side of the page.

The banner below provide links to national websites containing information, advice and resources on a number of topics.

From pregnancy to breastfeeding to learning how to potty train the NHS choices Pregnancy, Baby and Toddler site provides a guide to everything you need to know.

The What to Expect, When page featured on the Foundation Years website offers a range of information, advice and guidance to help you as a parent/carer find out more about how your child is learning and developing during their first five years

This Child Health 6-15 years contains advice on a range of subjects including healthy weights, sleep and bullying.

Getting teenagers to talk openly about what's bothering them can be hard. Follow these tips to help get them talking to you about their worries.

Family Lives is a charity specialising in families. You can call their confidential helpline on 0808 800 2222 (9am-9pm Monday to Friday, 10am-3pm Saturday to Sunday). You can also visit their forums.

Young Minds have produced a parent survival guide. They also offer a national helpline

Gingerbread provide advice, practical support and campaign for single parents

NHS Choices have produced a large number of short videos for their Youtube channel on a wide range of aspects of parenting, family relationships, child development and health and wellbeing.

This link takes you to the playlist section with answers to questions and scenarios that can help. This includes;

Parents, Pregnancy and Birth,

Breastfeeding Your Baby

Parents, Babies and Toddlers

Vaccinations

Teen Health

Mental Health

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Being a parent is rewarding, watching your children grow and helping them to find their independence. Parenting can also be really hard work!! In this section you will find a range of national and local services relating to family life including parenting and support services from pre-pregnancy to adulthood.

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At the moment parent workshops are held online via zoom. These informative and engaging workshops cover a wide range of topics and provide something for every age range. You can see the upcoming sessions by clicking

Parent workshops are a great way to add vital tools to your parenting toolkit, to have your questions answered and to remember all the good things you are already doing so well!

These are recorded workshops that you can listen to at your leisure. They can be purchased by clicking

Managing Anger and Strong Emotions
These are workshops for the parents of a specific school. They are funded by the school for their community. Often a school will host a programme of workshops for their parents. For more information click
Stop Shouting and Create Learning Instead
Don't forget to follow Lorraine Lee Training on Facebook and Instagram
Positive Discipline - Primary Age
Positive Discipline - Secondary Age
Helping Siblings To get Along

Once purchased, these pre-recorded workshops are like having a good book on the shelf that you can revisit time and time again, for understanding, strength and support.

PRE RECORDED WORKSHOPS SCHOOL WORKSHOPS SOCIAL MEDIA

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At the moment parent workshops are held online via zoom. These informative and engaging workshops cover a wide range of topics and provide something for every age range. You can see the upcoming sessions by clicking Parent workshops are a great way to add vital tools to your parenting toolkit, to have your questions answered and to remember all the good things you are already doing so well!