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Mindfulness Based Interventions in Schools

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Self-Regulation, Self-Care, Self-Awareness

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College & Career Competencies FrameworkResources

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Over the past several months, I've been doing a deep dive into the world of self regulation in order to plan a Tier 1 classroom guidance curriculum. I gathered a big list of books for counselors to either use in their lessons to support the skills taught in the curriculum or for counselors to suggest to teachers in order to create a classroom-counseling connection. The books focus on integral skills such as recognizing emotions, understanding that emotions change, behaviors that are and are not appropriate to the situation, calming strategies, and perspective taking. What self regulation books do you use with your students? Check out the list to see if you find any to add to your shelf!

Pressed for time? See them all here on this Amazon list.

This post contains affiliate links.

Books about Basic Emotions

Before students can begin to understand how to regulate their emotions, they have to first understand what emotions are and how they feel! These books will help students to develop an emotional vocabulary and gain a better understanding of the emotions they experience.
The Way I Feel, Janan Cain In My Heart, Jo Witek The Feelings Book, Todd Parr Glad Monster, Sad Monster, Ed Emberly My Many Colored Days, Dr. Suess Today I Feel Silly, Jamie Lee Curtis When I Feel Angry, Cornelia Maude Listening to My Body, Gabi Garcia The Great Big Book of Feelings, Mary Hoffman
Books About Changing Emotions

When students understand the basic emotions they experience and what they feel like in their bodies, they can then begin to recognize changes in these emotions. They can also detect different levels of emotions. These books will help students recognize changes in the characters emotion and see how the characters manage these changes.
Lizzy's Ups and Downs, Jessica Harper Sometimes I Feel Like a Storm Cloud Double Dip Feelings, Barbara Cain I Hate Everything, Sue Graves When Miles Got Mad, Sam Kurtzman-Counter When Sophie Gets Angry - Really, Really, Angry, Molly Bang Even Superheroes Have Bad Days, Shelly Becker
If you're looking for an activity for this book, check out this post with a sorting activity for your students.

Books about Behaviors

Understanding what behaviors fit in certain situations is an important self regulation skill!When students understand how their behaviors affect others and how others will respond to their choices, they understand how their choices will affect other people's emotion levels. These books look at behaviors that are inappropriate to the situation and positive alternatives.
David Gets in Trouble, David Shannon David Goes to School, David Shannon No, David!, David Shannon What Were You Thinking? Lisa Griffen It's Hard to be a Verb, Julia Cook Soda Pop Head, Julia Cook My Mouth is a Volcano, Julie Cook What Should Danny Do?, Adir Levy What if Everybody Did That?, Ellen Javernick Do Unto Otters, Laurie Keller I Can Do That! Kayla Marnach I'm in Charge of Me, David Parker The Way I Act, Steve Metzger
Books about Problem Size

Understanding how big problem really is helps students to gauge their responses! These books will helps students understand when they can solve problems on their own and when they should ask for help.
Tattle Tongue, Julia Cook Don't Squeal Unless It's a Big Deal, Jeanie Franz Ransom Bumps, Hills, and Mountains, Julie Balderston
Books about Calming Strategies

Once students understand their own emotional responses and the context of their behavior, they can choose calming strategies that will help them to regulate and make positive choices. These books provide ample strategies for calming the body and mind.
My Incredible Talking Body, Rebecca Bowen
Check out this post for activity ideas and a free printable!
I am Peace, Susan Verde I am Yoga, Susan Verde
For a craft idea for this book and free yoga printable cards, check out this post!
Breathe Like a Bear, Kira Willey The Lemonade Hurricane, Licia Morelli Charlotte and the Quiet Place, Deborah Sosin Anh's Anger, Gail Silver Moody Cow Meditates, Kerry Lee MacLean
Books about Thinking Strategies

Another important aspect of self regulation is understanding how thoughts affect feelings and behaviors. Use these books to help students develop positive self talk, encouraging mantras, and flexible thinking skills.
I Will be Okay, Laurie Wright I Matter, Laurie Wright My Day is Ruined, Bryan Smith Of Course It's a Big Deal, Bryan Smith Your Fantastic Elastic Brain, JoAnn Deak I Think, I Am!, Louise Hay Ish, Peter Reynolds The Dot, Peter Reynolds My New Best Friend, Sara Marlowe Listening with My Heart, Gabi Garcia There's a Bully in My Brain, Kristin O'Rourke
Books about Empathy & Perspective Taking

The ability to see a problem from multiple perspectives helps students to better regulate and choose a response that honors everyone involved. These books will help students recognize that there are always unseen facts and different perspectives!
Stand in my Shoes, Bob Sornson You, Me, and Empathy, Jayneen Sanders Just Because, Amber Housey Hey Little Ant, Phillip and Hannah Hoose They All Saw a Cat, Brendan Wenzel I am the Dog, I am the Cat, Donald Hall The Other Side of the Story, Nancy Loewen
What books do you use to teach self regulation skills? I'm looking for more to support my self regulation curriculum! Let me Let me know in the comments, and be sure to check out these other books that I love!

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Self Regulation Books: 60 Great Titles for School Counseling Activities

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Over the past several months, I've been doing a deep dive into the world of self regulation in order to plan a Tier 1 classroom guidance curriculum. I gathered a big list of books for counselors to either use in their lessons to support the skills taught in the curriculum or for counselors to suggest to teachers in order to create a classroom-counseling connection.

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How can you support the development of self-regulation in your child? Check out some of our best activities and ideas here!
*This post contains affiliate links. Read more.
What is Self-Regulation?

When we talk about self-regulation in kids, we're referring to the ability to maintain an arousal level that is appropriate for any given situation. Self-regulation also involves having the ability to generate appropriate behavioral and sensory responses to the input in different situations and daily routines and the ability to demonstrate self control: to monitor and control behavior, attention, motor output, emotions, and social interactions.

Self-regulation skills might include a child maintaining his composure and problem-solving or asking a caregiver for help or guidance when another child takes his toy or being able to self-monitor, control their impulses, and keep their voice quiet in the library. Self regulation in the classroom or school might include a child being able to attend and stay at his desk while the classroom teacher is talking or being able to stay with his class and walk in line in the hallway.

It sounds like a lot, doesn't it? That's because self-regulation is extremely complex. It involves cognition, the sensory systems, behavior...and so much more! Many children struggle with one or more of these areas, making self-regulation challenging. Children who are autistic, who have ADHD, or who need more sensory processing supports may struggle with self-regulation skills more than other kids. Toddlers and kids in the preschool years are still actively developing the ability to regulate themselves and may demonstrate outbursts and tantrums as part of typical development. But all of us - adults and children alike - can have difficulty with managing our own emotions and behaviors when faced with basic daily stressors like tiredness or hunger.

The Self-Regulation Handbook

Here at The Inspired Treehouse, we're so passionate about the topic of Self-Regulation that we finally decided to write a book about it! The Self-Regulation Handbook is an ebook that's packed with tools, activities, strategies, and information that are perfect for supporting self-regulation in kids at home, in the classroom, or during therapy sessions. Click here to learn more!

How Can You Tell if Your Child is Struggling With Self-Regulation?

Recognizing when kids have self-regulation concerns involves recognizing different patterns of behavior. Kids who are having difficulty with self-regulation may:

-Act overly silly or "out of control"

-Have tantrums or meltdowns

-Struggle with transitions between activities

-Have difficulty waiting or taking turns

-Struggle with being in close proximity to others (e.g. circle time)

-Demonstrate problems and frustration during social interactions (e.g. talking too loud, standing too close, touching others)

-Have difficulty walking or waiting in line

-Move too quickly or with too much force

-Grab or touch objects impulsively

How to Help Kids Develop Self-Regulation

Even though self-regulation can be a challenging skill for many children, research has shown that games and fun activities can be effective in promoting better self-regulation and for children who are struggling.

It is also so important for kids to have caregivers who are able to maintain perspective, coach them through difficult situations, demonstrate empathy when kids are struggling with self-regulation, and form responsive relationships that foster kids' self-regulation capacities and self-esteem.

Games and therapy tools that support planning and problem solving, patience, memory, attention, motor control, and sequencing can help kids develop the ability to self-regulate despite challenging situations and circumstances. Calming techniques, self-awareness exercises, and mindfulness activities can also be effective in supporting the development of self-regulation.

The following 30 games and activities can be great ways to introduce self regulation strategies with kids!

Games and Activities for Self-Regulation

The following 30 games and activities can be great ways to introduce and practice self-regulation skills with kids and can even be used as self-regulation interventions during therapy sessions. Click on the linked titles for more information!

1 || Red Light, Green Light

Spice it up with these fun light buzzers! And be sure to check out our post about variations on this classic game to promote self control in kids!

2 || Simon Says

Try this Simon Says parachute game for a different twist on this old classic.

This fun obstacle course for kids is a great way to encourage teamwork and social skills while also working on gross motor skills like balance and coordination!

4 || Duck Duck Goose

A great old classic for working on social interactions, waiting, and more!

5 || Freeze tag

This is an awesome one for working on self-regulation because kids have to wait perfectly still until their friends come to "unfreeze" them.

Cooperative art activities for kids like Partner Painting are perfect for getting little ones to work together while also targeting visual motor and fine motor skills.

7 || Hide and seek

Can kids wait quietly in their hiding spots while their friends try to find them?

Group games for kids like Wacky Relay are a great way to focus on social skills, teamwork, and gross motor skills!

Freeze Dance is so perfect to use in the classroom or at home to practice regulating movements and behavior.

10 || Musical Chairs

We love this idea for working with kids on coping when it's their turn to be "out". It can be a big challenge, but a good way to practice.

The Mirror Mirror game can be as simple, or as challenging as you make it and is a super fun way to address controlled movements and attention.

Working together on controlling the parachute to play different games is awesome for working on self-regulation. Grab our favorite parachute here!

13 || "Counting Down" or Anticipation Activities

Try setting out a beanbag chair and helping the child wait by counting down - "3...2...1...JUMP!" and then jumping onto the bean bag chair. And then repeating the activity so the child knows to wait before jumping)

Bilateral coordination, memory and cognitive skills, and cooperative play are all packed into these fun hand clapping songs and games - and they'll also take you for a little stroll down memory lane!

Hedbanz is another fun game for working on self-regulation because kids have to resist the urge to yell out the picture on their friends' headbands!

16 || Dancing

Kids love practicing their favorite fast and slow dance moves to different types of music - great for regulating speed of movements.

Suspend game is a great fine motor challenge and also challenges kids to regulate the force of their movements.

18 || Balloon volleyball

When kids play balloon volleyball, they have to learn how to slow their movements down in order to control the balloon and not let it go flying!

Slow, careful movements are the name of the game in Jenga and you can modify the blocks to include fun questions and other prompts to boost social interaction.

We like the simple game of Operation for working with kids on coping with turn taking when they hit the buzzer on the pretend patient.

Simon is great way to work on visual attention and memory, this old game is a great one for your classroom or therapy bag.

22 || Sequencing Motor Tasks

For example - do 3 jumps, then 2 hops, then stand on one foot for 3 seconds)

Like Simon, Bop It is great for working on memory, but also includes an auditory processing challenge and an opportunity to learn how to remain calm when kids make a mistake.

Spot It is a perfect game for addressing visual processing skills and also offers kids a chance to cope with "losing" because the rounds go fairly quickly so they can get back "in the game".

These calming deep breathing techniques for kids are great strategies for supporting self-regulation and calm behavior at home, in the classroom, and beyond! Grab the free printable breathing cards too!

These 10 meditation resources are the perfect place to start if you want to try mindfulness activities and guided meditation for kids!

Mindful movement and mindful breathing are a great combination for supporting self-regulation. Try some yoga for kids in your classroom or during your next therapy session!

One of the most popular curriculums on the market for working on self-regulation, Zones of Regulation offers visual supports and practical activities for working on the skills kids need most to regulate themselves.

You'll want these calming techniques in your toolbox for addressing behaviors in the classroom setting.

And these awesome ideas are perfect for taking out into the community to practice self-regulation on the go!

Other Resources About Self-Regulation

1 || Developing Young Children's Self-Regulation Through Everyday Experiences, National Association for the Education of Young Children. Ida Rose Florez

2 || Self-Regulation: A Cornerstone of Early Childhood Development. Linda Groves Gillespie and Nancy L. Seibel. National Association for the Education of Young Children.

3 || Executive Function & Self-Regulation. Center on the Developing Child, Harvard University.

4 || How Can We Help Kids With Self-Regulation? Child Mind Institute.

5 || Strategies for Teaching Kids Self-Regulation. PBS.
6 || Self-Regulation Research: A Simple Overview
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How to Help Kids With Self-Regulation: 30 Games and Activities - The Inspired Treehouse

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How can you support the development of self-regulation in kids? This huge resource is full of self-regulation games, information, books, and more!

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Inside: Learn the most common mistake parents make when helping to build their child's emotional regulation skills and what approach is proven to work.

When it comes to teaching our child how to handle big emotions and challenging situations, the majority of parents fall victim to the same oversight- and it's a biggie.

On any given day, we watch our child's stress rise while they sit in the waiting room for a delayed appointment, get their toy snatched away by their brother, or get turned down on the third request for another popsicle.

We can see their tension building as their voices get stronger, and bodies get faster. The situation is quickly escalating, then as naturally as we'd pour our morning cup of coffee we firmly command our child to "CALM DOWN".

The thing is, this approach is missing the mark.

We all want to give our children the skills to manage the intense emotions and situations that are an inevitable part of daily life, but in doing so we've been missing a key point in regards to how kids learn self-regulation.

What is Self-Regulation?

Self-regulation is the ability to manage your emotions and behavior in accordance with the demands of a situation.

It's a set of skills that enables your child to inhibit their emotional or behavioral responses and direct their behavior towards a goal, such as making it till the end of the birthday party for the cake to be served or not hitting their friend so as to have an enjoyable playdate.
Essentially though, emotional regulation boils down to how your child manages incoming and outgoing stress.
Research consistently shows that self-regulation is necessary for social-emotional and academic success and well-being and is one of the most important skills for our child to develop.

Here's where we've gone wrong

You know these little beings we've been commanding to "get control of yourself!"?

Most of them are not even close to being developmentally capable of regulating their emotions and behaviors independently.

The part of the brain responsible for impulse control and a multitude of self-regulation tasks is underdeveloped in children, in addition to all their sensory systems being immature (which are responsible for taking in and processing information from the environment all day long).
A young child is oftentimes rendered physiologically unable to calm down by themselves.
An exponentially more effective way to approach expanding your child's emotional regulation skills is to envision an active partnership (known as co-regulation) for building self-regulation.

While this concept is seemingly basic, it's more challenging than it sounds. Take a second to call to mind how you feel and react when your child is in the throes of an emotional meltdown.

Many of our instincts echo something reminiscent of "get. me. outta. here!" which is why we are quick to order our child away to their room or to the corner.

Our own stress response urges us to move away from our child when they're floundering, when in fact what most children desperately need from us when in emotional upheaval is for us to move toward them.

It is, in fact, a caregivers calm and steady physical presence (due to a child's hard-wired need for connection) that fills the gap of developmental immaturity during the time's a child feels and acts out of control.
If you can adopt this research-grounded mindset and step up in a spirit of collaboration with your child, these 5 steps are guaranteed to improve your child's emotional regulation skills with time.
6 Steps to improved emotional regulation skills
Step 1: Model positive emotional regulation skills for your child.
It should go without being said, but a child is watching more than listening most days. How you identify and respond to the stressors in your daily environment will be the best teacher and example for your child. (This one's pretty straightforward but likely requires some self-reflection homework on your part).

Step 2: Help your child be a stress detective.

All children have particular situations, environments or sensations that create excessive stress for them, whether it be the common scenarios of lack of sleep and hunger or more particular things such as sensitivity to loud noises or transitioning away from electronic devices.

If you're not sure where to start when finding situations that are challenging for your child start by noticing when and where they present challenging behaviors such as whining, defiance or emotional meltdowns. Helping your child cultivate an awareness of what consistently causes stress for them build's important skills of self-awareness and empowers you both to prepare ahead of time for greater success.
Step 3: Empower your child with knowledge.
In my therapy practice, I teach my kiddos about their brain using the hand model from Dr. Dan Siegel which breaks down the neuroscience of their emotions in a simple way by looking at the upstairs brain (thinking) and the downstairs (emotional brain) and how our thinking brain goes offline when our emotions are running high.

This is the brains typical and healthy response to stress so it's important to normalize this for them, as the feeling of being 'out of control' can be disconcerting and anxiety provoking for many kids.

After we familiarize with brain basics we talk about the bodies 'anger warning signs'. How do your emotions manifest physically in your body? Do your palms get sweaty? Maybe you notice your heart pounding? Helping kids notice the physiological signs of anger is the first step in promoting concrete internal signals that promote self-awareness.
Step 4: Teach the basics of emotional intelligence.
Emotional Intelligence is defined as the ability to recognize, understand and manage our own emotions and the emotions of others.

Emotional intelligence concepts are a huge part of emotional regulation and square one is making sure your child has a wide emotion vocabulary. Identifying emotions is the first step to working through them, so teaching kids that there are MANY different emotions and labels for various emotions, allows them to take the first step of working through them.

Using visual tools is a great way to do this, check out my emotional intelligence bundle for toddlers through early elementary ages HERE.
Step 5: Explore coping strategies together.
The next step after identifying the emotion is helping them find healthy and productive outlets for their intense emotions.

Every child's nervous system and sensory system is unique, so it is realistic to expect a LOT of trial and error, and to also expect that what works will change over time!

A few questions to get you thinking about what soothes your child: Is there a particular space your child finds calming? Where do they run when upset or frustrated? Do they seem to calm with physical touch or appear to avoid it? Do they prefer to be around others or respond better to quiet solitude?
Step 6: Mindfulness and breathing practice.
First off, our bodies and minds are inextricably linked so some very simple things parents can do off the top to give their child's emotional regulation skills a boost are keeping consistent routines, meals and bedtimes which all help your child's brain to self-regulate.

There is a lot of research showing us the power of taking good quality breaths and how this soothes and calms our nervous system. It's the first thing I teach kids in my therapy practice. In order for our child to seek out a state of calm, they need to know how it feels to be calm.

There is so much research on mindfulness and its ability to regulate our emotions and behaviors by strengthening our prefrontal cortex (the part of our brain that shuts down when your child is upset). Incorporating simple mindfulness practices into the day goes a long way to keep your child's baseline emotional arousal level lower in addition to giving them an amazing calming strategy they can use anywhere at any time.

There is hope for improving your child's emotional regulation skills

While it may not seem like it mid-meltdown, when you move away from being an emotional referee and begin to view yourself as an emotional guide, with dedication and development, the fruits of your labor will be more and more evident in the way your child interacts with the world around him. With time, you will begin to see them putting the pieces of self-regulation into practice when things don't go their way.

There is hope for improved emotional regulation for all children, regardless of any challenges they may face emotionally, behaviorally or environmentally.

There isn't a single child who, with understanding and patience, can't be guided along a trajectory that leads to a rich and meaningful life. -Dr. Stuart Shanker

P.S. Get more research-backed parenting articles on improving your child's emotional health and well-being by signing up for the PWC newsletter (and get a free guide!)

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6 Guaranteed Ways To Boost Your Child's Emotional Regulation Skills

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Inside: Learn the most common mistake parents make when helping to build their child's emotional regulation skills and what approach is proven to work. When it comes to teaching our child how to handle big emotions and challenging situations, the majority of parents fall victim to the same oversight- and it's a biggie.

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"still face experiment"

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Still Face Experiment: Dr. Edward Tronick