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I thought you'd like this song.

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Josh, thank you for your silly and caring attitude!!😘 You always managed to swing by our house in Moreno Valley to spend little time with Nick and Brandon. I loved cooking for you each time you came by and with your sweet, politeness..always told me it was the best dinner. I miss and love you my nephew in Christ  ❤️

Always in my Heart,
Ming Laurie

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There are those I know I will have for the rest of my life, you were definitely one of them. We were suppose to grow into old friends, even though I knew what to expect because you dressed like a old man, but I didn't expect this, losing you so early and so sudden. Throughout the years of our friendship you have always inspired me to live a life with compassion for the broken hearted and conviction for a broken world because that's how you lived always, without hesitation and with complete ease. I envied that, until I now and always I strive for that. Joshua, when I start to lose hope in humanity, which is often, I think of you, your heart, love, kindness, resourcefulness, and determination to be different, to have a sense of self like no other. For the rest of my life, you will continue to give me this and I am eternally grateful to have called you my friend.
Love,
Nay

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mama's sweet boy

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Jan 11 201

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Worth far more than silver and gold. I think you'd appreciate this post. I love you brothaman. You called me that because some cool older person you worked with at the UCSD library said it and you liked it haha. And I thought it was fitting, since you really were a brother to me. We had so many amazing times. I feel like our story wasn't highlighted by grand times and huge gestures---it was highlighted by just hanging out and being present in the moment, doing literally anything Andy just being with each other in each other's presence. Late night beach trips, the Ouija board in your room, staying up til 3am beating a tower defense flash game, me waking your butt up every day (no, I didn't actually kick you in the stomach that one time), California burritooooos, "Josh Chan does tricks" skateboard sessions, fairly one-sided music sessions, boombox handcuffs, Tycho show, random snowy hiking trip, driving to SoCal listening to the Tarzan soundtrack, digging up a raft and setting it free down the river, watching Hoosiers on VHS, listening to indie music, you just wandering off, Souplantation, you coming all the way up to Seattle for Matiayahu, New Year's Eve games with your family, you passing out in your van and making me have to break into your phone to get your address and then the phone dying and me driving around lost until I randomly happened to find your house, rooting around Burger records and picnicking on the grassy hill outside, selling loosies at the donut shop.... just living life. You challenged my perceptions and preconceived notions of the world. You taught me valuable lessons. You showed me that life is the small things much more than the big. And you espoused that amazingly. I'll do my best to carry that forward in my life from here on out. It's my way of keeping you with me. You rock, man. Thanks for everything. That's weird, right? Thanking you? I don't know. I just miss you. Don't be weird. I love you.

Your brother,
Austin

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What I'm Fighting For - Matisyahu (Cover)

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Joshua and Austin, we're playing the song that's on both of our ringtones. Hope y'all like it! Boomshakalaka

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Dear Josh,

I am so thankful that I got the chance to know you! You always brought sunshine and so much laughter to the CSA family. Your silliness, kindness, humbleness, sweetness, and thoughtfulness are some of the things that made you such an amazing person. Thank you for being such an awesome coconut dance partner, for your creativity in film crew, and for always being you. Thank you for gifting us all with such wonderful memories, for those memories will never fade. You will always forever be in our hearts .  -Leann

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From Leann

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From Leann

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Dear Bong Josh, I’m really going to miss you when you’re gone.  I’m really going to miss your great big smile.  I’m also really sad you didn’t get to my new little brother Dominik. But every time I see him smile I think of you because he smiles as big as you do. Bong Josh you’ve been an    awesome cousin to me, you’re very funny, friendly, kind, and smart.  I also don’t remember this but I was wondering if you remember the talk we had at Monique’s birthday party.  It’s okay if you don’t remember because I don’t fully remember either.  Also I don’t know if you remember this but one time you came over to have dinner with my family and you told a really funny joke.  But I can’t quite remember what the joke was.  And I was wondering if you remember Tai.  If you remember him he wanted me to tell you he’ll miss you and he loves you.  We love you Bong Josh you’re the best.

Love, your cousins

Alonna And Tai Sayh

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Thank you so much for being an awesome friend and for the great memories that I will forever have of you. You have shown me the perfect example of a generous friend. I remember those days when you would randomly cook huge feasts for the whole house and fill our bellies with happiness. But most importantly, I will always remember how generous you were with your time. You were always down to hangout whenever and wherever. Even after working long hours, you always showed up with a smile and laughter. I am so blessed to have met a friend like you, and I will always miss you.
-Paul

I still can't believe it. It doesn't seem real. Feels like just yesterday... we were chilling at Jesse's, laughing and talking about weird things. You were always so true to yourself and expressed every thought and feeling you had. You let us explore your mind and always had us thinking new things. You were truly special. While editing and watching our wedding clips, it was so obvious the person you were...just smiling your big smile and dancing so freely. Even when things were tough, you were always so positive. Thank you for sharing your happiness with us. Thank you for staying up with Austin to make us all those delicious heart-shaped donuts for our wedding. Thank you for those random snaps. Thanks for just being a part of my life. Reunions really won't be the same without you. Your sd crew misses you. SO. MUCH. You'll always be a part of us. And we'll always be thinking of you.
-Eunice

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A few clips of Josh from our wedding. We will forever miss you.

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This song reminds me of Josh, a humble and easy going guy. He is the kind of guy that will always be remembered.  I’ve got a few memories of Josh that I’d like to share.

I worked with him on a couple of construction projects.  Josh always seems easy going and relaxed, but I’ve seen him work hard.  When we were demolishing a room floor in L.A., he was pretty crazy.  It was supposed to be an hour long job to demolish a room floor but he wanted to rip out the whole floor in 10 minutes.  He went all out; poured out all his energy into scrapping the floor. Dust was flying all over the room and sweat dripping from his chin.  I left the dusty room, but he just kept going at it.  A few minutes later, he came out and said, “I got all the big pieces out.”  I smiled and replied, “Cool, I’ll take care of the small pieces.”  Josh would do the strenuous part of the job and I’d do the light part.  We were a great team.

Another memory of Josh that I won’t forget is Josh thinking hard.  I believe it was December 24th, 2016. Christmas Eve. We were still working at the LA house.  He was working that day but he was thinking hard about something.  He kept looking up and curling his mustache.  During lunch, he ate without talking but continuously looked up as he stroked his mustache.  After a while, he finally said, “I’m really bummed out.  I got to make a present for my family, something that’s hand made.  I don’t have any idea what to do.  Our family is meeting at 6PM today and I really want to have something special….”  By 5:30PM, we came up with the idea of a picture frame using the oak floor.  All he had to do was cut four pieces of the oak floor and nail it together.  With a little help from me, he was able to make the frame in 30 minutes.  After the frame was done, he was really happy. He truly touches everyone with his endless love. He gave me a big hug, said “Merry Christmas Gu Al!  I got to go…”, then jumped on his bike and rode away.

I’m gonna miss him.  It’s really sad that he’s gone, but his memory will live on. Keep it wild. God bless you, Josh.

Love,
Gu Al

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Josh was a kind person. He was humble, loyal, and always, always, always marched to the beat of his own drum. He could add depth to any conversation by posing some remarkably deep point of view, and then blindside you the very next minute with some levity. He was a beautiful person -- both inside and out. He had the brightest smile to top off his handsome face. I also don't think I've known a single person who has gone through quite as many hairstyles as Josh has. That on its own is a testament to Josh's unique sense of living. He lived fearlessly and gracefully. Josh was always there to lend an ear to me when I was feeling blue or out of sorts. He would remember little things I told him or did -- things I barely remembered myself -- and mention them out of the blue at a later time. He was thoughtful.

In the days since his passing, I've found my mind replaying all the memories I shared with him. Moments that seemed insignificant at the time of their occurrence are now ones that I know I will treasure for the rest of my life. Thoughts of him hacking away at a coconut right before we were set to graduate from college, or him playfully mocking the way I would say "sweeeeet", or him belting out songs randomly at the top of his lungs, or the multiple times I've seen him climb things -- any thing and every thing, honestly -- are on a constant loop in my mind. In the act of retracing my memories with Josh I've realized that he was consistently a force of positivity, joy, and love.

There was a point in time when Josh would respond to any and every text I sent with an audio message. I recently located those audio texts and gathered up the courage to listen to them. While hearing his voice did stir up feelings of pain, it more than anything made me happy.

I am eternally grateful for my friendship with Josh and the forces that brought us together. While it is difficult to accept that Josh is no longer physically with us, I know that all those who were lucky enough to know him and to love him will carry a piece of him in their hearts and their actions.

I love you, Josh. I am hopeful that we will one day meet again.

Stephanie Deveza

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Only video i have of josh.

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Josh, my memories with you are not many. But those I do have, those are so heavily painted by the guy, you, that was always shining, always so humbly shining. Josh, you radiated kindness, you induced so much laughter, you were always so raw. You were shamelessly random, carrying antique items or playing Cambodian music in the middle of the desert, you shamelessly arrived to parties in your Castle Park uniform to support two of my dearest friends, one of them your sister. Josh you were unequivocally raw, it was so beautiful and it never ceased to surprise me. What reason did you have to sit with my siblings and I, who you hardly knew, when in a room full of people you knew so well? What obligation did you have to go camping with your sister's friends, none of whom you knew very well? What reason did you have to share a bit of life and laughter with us? None, but you did, you always did. I am both so sad and so grateful to have had the opportunity to know you Josh and although so much pain has been left in the space you once filled, you also left so much awe inspiring beauty. Josh and all of the Chan's, thank you for being a family that inspires, that emanates so much beauty, and loves so deeply--thank you for humbly shining.

-With so much love,
Ruth Quintanilla

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I am so saddened that I didn't get much of a chance to get to know you well, but from the small chances I did have, I was blessed by your humor and smile. I appreciate the fact that you were fearless to be your unique self. And it truly grieves me that you are gone, especially at so young of age. I love you brother, and I pray I may meet you again pausingthe Almighty Restoring Father. 

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I am so saddened that I didn't get much of a chance to get to know you well, but from the small chances I did have, I was blessed by your humor and smile. I appreciate the fact that you were fearless to be your unique self. And it truly grieves me that you are gone, especially at so young of age. I love you brother, and I pray I may meet you again pausingthe Almighty Restoring Father. 

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Love, in the Name of Christ,
Serei Sieng

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We love you josh. Josh whenever we see each other you always put a smile on my face. I remember the time you came to vages with us and you had no more clean pants you had to walk outside in your underwear it was so funny. Maxwinn wants to say thank you for the stuffed bunny he loves it....thank you.
We Love You.

Love,
Maddison Pech And
Maxwinn Chan

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Hey Josh, I figured it might be better to write to you rather than about you. I'm pretty sure heaven has social media so hopefully you'll get around to reading all these. You might not have noticed but I really did look up to you. You were smart, athletic, and popular, plus all the lady's liked you haha. Who didn't want to be you. I remember when we used to hang out at your house with Tim and I tried to jam out with you guys on the guitar. I learned a couple notes here and there, but I could never really play or sing like you. Remember the last time I saw you? It was at the park in chino hills, we boarded around and I showed my car to you. Must of been a good 3 years since then. I kinda wish I hung out with your family more, or at least try some of the donuts you make. I also regret not asking about your mustache, what's the maintenance on it? And how long did it take to grow out? Life goes by too fast, people get old, they come and go. I regret quite a bit in my lifetime, but the moments I shared with you and your family will never be forgotten. I don't know if you remember my uncle Andy, but if you see him up there tell him I said hi. Tell me about your mustache when I see you again. Rest In Peace. Heaven has gained a gloriously mustached Asian man.

-Anthony Nguyen aka Tap Some Bong

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Josh was in our group of friends at UCSD. The whole crew wasn't complete without each unique individual: Jesse, Anna, Eunice, Paul, Stephanie, Christian, Franklin, Chantelle, Austin, many more, and Josh...It was the weekend crew. I would drift in and out on the weekends but whenever I came back, I was always greeted by Josh and his goofy smile.

He was never negative and I have never seen him in a bad mood. Every one of us went through the awkward stages of growing up but Josh always had it together. Always calm and smiling. I still remember his smile as I chomped on the delicious donuts he made at Eunice & Paul's wedding.

A couple days ago, I messaged Austin after hearing the news and he told me that although we are all in mourning, Josh would want us to be happy and continue to find the joys in life. This really stuck to me because I know this is what Josh would want.

To Josh: we lost another very rare, good soul, but I hope you are in an even better place now. We miss you, love you, and we will continue to try to find the joy and smile through life. We will all see you again 💛

Smile on,

Grace

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Mr. Cool & Positivity!

Just heard of your passing and a part of me doesn't want to believe this. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that this happened to you and your family. I can't even imagine what they must be going through, to lose a beloved son, brother, cousin, a heart of gold.

You always carried yourself with a sense of style and energy that always made me glad I was hanging out or working with you. You always brought out that smile, that sense of community and brotherly love when you were around. We met in college in CSA and I remember going to the meetings, socials and just talking to you. For culture show, we would make the props for the stage and I remember us spending hours and days just making sure things were going right and according to plan. During one of our breaks, I remembered a snack you made to share which was basically Tostinos pizza rolls with whipped cream on top. It was an odd combo but good. It was creative.

You were such a hard worker. The night before the show, you stayed up with me until morning just trying to finish. Your commitment to your club and work ethic just showed me that you were a person who cared and someone we could depend on. That was Josh.

You also had that long, luscious hair I liked. I thought that was so cool. You didn't know but you gave me some strength and inspiration to grow out my hair, something I evidently now know is a difficult process. You rode that cool bike around campus and never failed to stop and have a chat with me. It was always brotherly love.

Well, Mr. Cool & Positivity, I'm glad that I've met you and you were a part of my life. Though it has been years since, I have always remembered you that way and will continue to. I'll try not to get sad when I think of you but instead, celebrate your life and the love you showed me and everyone around you.

Rest in peace brother.

Pete

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Josh,

I can honestly say I don’t ever recall seeing you without a smile on your face. At this very moment, I’m imagining you with your ever so cool mustache and your awesome sense of style. I have always admired your willingness to be different and unique. I like how you and I had the on going joke with one another when I would call you “Robert” and you would call me “John” LOL. It makes me laugh every time I think about it. Even now that you’re gone, I smile thinking about how blessed we all are to have had you in our lives.  The Bible tells us the God is the one who determines where we would live and move and have our being. I am so blessed that God allowed me to have known you for the relatively short time that I did. My family and I are keeping your family in our thought and prayers through this very difficult time. Although we all know in our hearts that death is a part of life, nothing can ever prepare us for the actual moment when someone close is taken. This is evidence to me that death was not supposed to be normal. It was not God’s original design for us. The reality is that we all live in a sinful world. Romans 6:23 tells us “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Your passing is bitter sweet because you are no longer with us, but you are now in the presence of the Almighty God. The King of Kings and Lord of Lords. This, however, is the reason I rejoice in my heart. You found the one and only way through whom eternal life is given, the real "Fountain of Youth". You, Josh, knew Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, and because of that, I know you are probably participating in a worship service in Heaven right now. Singing your heart out as I’ve seen you do many times. As believers in Jesus Christ we know that when a life is taken, only Jesus Christ is able to restore that life. You are restored and renewed now in your heavenly dwelling. How extremely lucky you are to see the King of Glory face to face. I look forward to the day when we meet again because I know we will. When it’s my turn, meet me at the gates of heaven with your huge smile and your awesome mustache. On that day you can call me “John” again and I will call you “Robert.” Say Hi to Jesus for us all. You will be dearly missed.

TK

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Josh, one of my favorite memories of you was when I first went to Youth Camp & you came up to me while I was alone during free time and started making bracelets with me. We got into some awesome conversations and you started calling me Liz's twin. I'll also never forget those time you came over to hang out with Nate and how much fun we all used to have. Thank you so much for being so kind & genuine. I'll definitely be praying for your family.

Em

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I didn't know Josh very long. I met him at the 32nd annual district conference. He was an awesome guy to get to know while I was there. I dont really have many photos of him but here is what I have from the conference.
I'm glad I was able to meet you Josh!
My name is James Rin from Columbus Ohio

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My favorite Nephew! It started 2 years ago. This weird good looking kid working for me. Always optimistic, willing to learn, utmost respectful, always goes out of his way to help his uncle out. He always says his uncle pay him more than he deserve. I always says he doesn't understand how lucky his uncle is to have him around. Josh has shown me what good people really are. When i give him a bonus, he use that money to take homeless people out to dinner. He makes me realize that it doesn't matter how little you have, but there are people that have less. You can't help everyone, but you have to help as much as possible. I can go on and on how great Josh is. Me and my family will miss this great nephew of our forever. Attached is a picture of him always sending me his clown face. Love You Alway, Uncle Sam and Auntie Serena.

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Josh was there

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Josh was there...with a bubble gum bubble

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I didn't know you too well. But the energy you gave off was undeniably magnetic! I remember when you all were going to the art walk but I didn't get invited... you knocked on my door, making an effort to bring me along! So blessed to have met you. You taught me to get out of my head, and live free! I will always follow your lesson! You were always so helpful, ready for the world with your tool belt. I remember telling you my taboo ideas, and you making me feel just as cool and comfortable. Or how we both were stoked when we discovered that we we're both saving up for a camper! You showed me the ones you were looking at and I knew at that moment this had to be the best idea! When it comes, my camper will be dedicated to you Josh. I'll take you out on the open road ! Hope I'm just as brave
-Gina

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You were the kid I knew that grew up searching and discovering not how to fit in but how to express yourself. I'll have to admit, I was the guy that often looked at you and said, "What happenned to the kid that lived in Riverside and when did he grow a mustache?" I didnt always understand you, but I always loved you as my little brother in Christ. If there's one word that can describe Josh, it would be joy. It made no difference what happened around you, you would still be smiling from ear to ear.

Its not that you're gone... your just not here, but there... is where we'll meet agian.
-Cham

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Josh,

Thank you for being a light and joy to so many around you. You never entered a room without making someone laugh or smile. It was a pleasure being led in worship by you and always being reminded that God is our truest homie. I find peace and comfort knowing that one day we'll all meet again and you can tell us about all the cool rocks up there.

- Julie

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8 years ago I met you at C-FWD. From a distance you looked like the life of the party and my first thought was, "this guy is way too cool to even acknowledge me." But you shut that down real quick. I have never met someone who made inclusivity a priority. Never once did I feel excluded at my first year at camp. From small talk to your random questions about "farmland Ohio." I am thankful for your heart, your sense of humor, your shoulder that you let me drool on during our forever long car ride home. And thank you for always making me feel included. Your legacy goes on even without you here.

Dom

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I remember Josh as a toddler walking around in his diaper full of snot on his face.  However, I will cherish the evergrowing young man of God he became.
These past few years we have only seen Josh at family gatherings.  The one thing I appreciate most is knowing I can reconnect with Josh in an instant and catch up where we left off.
I have always appreciated Josh's individuality, uniqueness and keen sense of style.
Everytime I see Josh, i am refreshed with his free-spirit.
Josh is definitely one of a kind, leaving his impression in all our hearts.
Til we meet again in heaven Josh, we love you.  -peou's

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Josh,

I am going to miss having you as our roomie. I am going to miss going out to the living room and finding an empty bag of chips followed by crumbs on the couch. I am going to miss throwing your clothes in the dryer for you. I am going to miss how you always greeted me hello when you came home. And how you always snapped your fingers all the way to your room. I am truly going to miss your presence. I am sad that you are no longer here with us. But I am happy that one day in heaven we will be roomies again.

Being able to live with you this past year has truly been a blessing. Because through all your trials and tribulations this year, like you said yourself, you found JOY in the JOurneY. And I hope to find that same joy when life gets tough just as you have. Thank you for reminding Tim and I that the joy we find in God is so much greater than the happiness that we can find on our own.

I am glad to know that you now have the best roomie in whole wide world and that is our heavenly Dad. Love you so much, Josh.

SquirrelMonkie

P.S. Thanks for choosing Korean BBQ as our last meal. You da best.

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Thank you for all the small little moments that you shared with us. No matter how big or small, you impacted the lives of many. What made it so unique was the way you treated everyone around you. How simple, sweet, genuine, and charismatic you were. You brought light where there was darkness. Oh how I will miss calling out to you Chan. We will all miss you. I am grateful to have met someone like you. You will forever stay in my heart
-V 💛

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When i found out what happened, i thought it was a cruel joke. I'm still in shock and disbelief, but sending daily prayers of comfort over your friends, family, and everyone that was blessed to have you in their life. You are definitely one of a kind, in the best way. Thank you for always having random conversations with me to make me feel included. I'll always remember you calling me "baby Didi" even though we were pretty much the same age. I love your humor and your giant heart. You always had such random words of wisdom for me, and though we didnt see each other that often, somehow it always related to my life at that time. Thank you for encouraging me to push myself to sing and telling me not to think about the audience or focus on how I sounded, but to remember that I was singing for God and to praise Him. You will be missed greatly but I know you're smiling and watching over all of us ❤

- Di

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From Leann

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Lo-fi glitch art by josh p. 2

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some lo-fi glitch art that josh made p.1

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Like a perfect flower
That is just beyond your reach
Gone too soon
Born to amuse
To inspire, to delight
Here one day
Gone one night
Like a sunset
Dying with the rising of the moon
Gone too soon

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Bro. The first thing I ever said to u was kom Touw. You told me that it was an actual word in Chinese and that you would gind out what it meant. A few days later you told me that it meant Dont Go. And thats all i want to say to you right now is not to go. We had so many silly conversations about what your next steps in life would be and you said "I work at an amusement park Brashawn, I am living the life".

I used to watch you go live on instagram every day and see you riding your bike through town. Then when I saw you at work we would talk about it. I used to yell at you about buckling belts on the empty seats on dragons tower and you always tried your best to give the guest an awesome experience.

My last two memories with you are the most important ones. First, the night of the potluck when we were all playing a game at the park til 12 am and we just enjoyed eachothers company singing  songs  and I asked you and Ren to name the artist. My last memory  of you is the actal last time I saw you.  We were siting in the back of your truck talking about video games. You told me that  we were good friends and you looked forward to seeing me the next day.

When I found out that you were  gone I was in complete disbelief. How? Why? Are the first things I thought. I felt like it was a cruel joke. Im still waiting on ur instagram for you to go live and say it is all a joke. This does not feel real to me...

I have to tell me self that you moved away and you lost my number in order to kind of ease the pain that you are actually gone. You   were a good guy, funny, never  complained, and  when I think of u all i see is your hair swooped over and your smile.

Rest easy brother. You'll always be in my heart and my prayers.

P.S. those stupid skinny cigarettes  will forever be your thing.

Respectfully yours,
Brashawn Washington

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Anyone who had the luxury to have known you is fortunate and will never forget you. We were only coworkers for a few months but that was more than enough time for anyone to realize what an amazing and truly unique person you were. Your authenticity and humor came through in every interaction I had with you; whether it was you making a nonsensical joke or talking about your experiences protesting in college or how you would do anything really. I feel robbed of getting to know you better and of hearing all of the other stories and jokes you had to offer, but I will always remember the ones you provided. I'm honored to have shared the same space with such a kind and genuine person like yourself and anyone that got to know you feels the same way. The workplace will be a lot less happy without you around but the memory of you will keep us smiling forever. Thank you for making all of our lives happier and thank you for sharing some moments of your life with me.

-Jonathan Moreno

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I know we talked about how blue surrounds us, but I don’t think there is any amount or intensity of blue that could bring solace to my heart right now. After Ma passed away, I remember how hard it was for me to come out of my room. I don’t know how you slept in her room every night. I guess that speaks to how strong you were. I put up walls to cope with the loss. Your response was to remove the door, LITERALLY. You took your bedroom door off the hinges! You let me keep my walls up, but you proclaimed, “Mary, I’m here. I’m here for you.” I’m so grateful for the memories in the Crestmore home. Instead of thinking of blue, I will think of the home we made for ourselves on that small dirt lot. Our little home that smelled of old couches and was draped in peeling floral wallpaper. I love you so much, Josh. I miss you every moment. The loss of you comes in waves. Waves of laughter and waves of sorrow that knock the breath right out of me. But I promise you I’ll dig my feet deeper into the sand and stay grounded. Or maybe I’ll take out my snorkel gear and swim above and beyond the waves. I’ll write, paint, draw and sing until the day I see you again and my heart becomes whole. Josh Chan. No style like your style.

Love you,

Murielll

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Josh was a unique guy. He always made me feel important and valued. He always used weird metaphors and carried around mustache wax.

He was a extremely caring individual who deserved everything life had to offer.

I'm so thankful that I was blessed to have him gracefully come into my life.

I remember he was so concerned about me hurting my wrist on my ride that he brought me 'Tiger Jaw Pain Relieving Ointment' it was the sweetest gesture I swear to you.

Josh was a beautiful person. I will never forget about him. I feel like he's watching down on me like how the Sun Baby watches over the Teletubies, just gotta add a mustache to the Sun Baby. Man I love you Josh and you'll be missed by everyone. You've impacted my life in ways I didn't know were possible.

Land of My Dreams by Anna Domino will ALWAYS be our song. Thank you for sharing your diverse music taste with me and allowing me to create bittersweet memories with you.

This heartache will remain but that's alright because I have all the good times to remember and be thankful for. You're a legendary man Josh Chan.

- April Martinez

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A playlist featuring Yuck, Duster, Anna Domino, and others

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I don't think you ever knew the impact you had on people's life's. I just want to thank you for giving me the opportunity to know such a special and unique person as yourself. I will forever think of you when someone attempts to open our office door and then I'll tell them to never do it again because that was your thing lol thank you for making me laugh and explains your reasoning behind every way you part your hair. Thank you thank you thank you for being just simply you. - Michelle 💙

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I remember, the minute before bonfire testimony night, Josh gave us one heck of a scare. Me, Luke, Vathana, Dennis, and Faustina were praying in a circle, when all of a sudden we heard a loud crouch in the bushes, so we all sped up the prayer in fear of what was approaching us in the bush. "Raaahhh"!, screamed Josh. We all jumped and screamed thinking it was a deer or a bear. Joshua Chan, you were the glue that kept the pieces together with your bright heart. May you Rejoice in Paradise Joshua Chan!

Big Rob S.

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I remember hiking with Josh in the middle of the night. He was carrying 30 pound army backpacking backpack with a sleeping bag around his neck. And under the moonlight he would say poems aloud.

There was that one time he climbed up a rock and did a karate kid pose.

There's also plenty of times where we'd walk and he just want to spill out the things he knows or even make up facts about what we're looking at. His narration is by far the most wittiest, funniest things to hear.

I remember we watched Break In. Lol. His suggestions = no regrets.

And then there was a time, he was playing just dance with Tim . Tim was racking up the points and As much as he tried he couldn't do it, so he just danced his own down to the music which looked so much better than the choreography for that song on the game.

There was also this moment when I was stuck on a rock from climbing it and he climbed up the rock to where I was after he had gotten down. and then showed me how to do it and then climbed back up to walk me through it.

There was a time we watched legally blonde one night and he watched part 1 and part 2 because it was real good. Even if we were asleep.

I saw a video of his live and he was with liz and she said there's noone  even on. But He kept talking. Haha I just think that's a perfect example of Josh. He didnt need to be saying all these great ideas to a mass of crowds...he just Simply said them.

His fascination with sound blows me away. He showed me how to play a drum machine. He gave me a cassette recorder for my music.  He talked about how much he's a guitar guy and was practicing his scales. Gosh, he was talented, so willing to learn, and so willing to make music and sing with anybody. Also side note when he hosted like art nights at an art gallery, he just met my friend Beth and they talked about art and music. He found out that Beth played music and the next day Josh put Beth's name to play a show that she didn't know about.

All to say, Josh is strong, he leads by serving, he's creative, out of this world, multifaceted but rather relates to people than gets ahead. He genuinely cares to care by supporting people in their gifts. He's a dreamer of sorts, sees still life as abstract, questioned norms but blessed them as well. To me Josh, getting to be around him was never a dull moment. I've always felt seen, heard, and encouraged by him.

Josh, truly you hold much integrity wherever you go whether rubidoux, Jtree, San Bernardino, church, Long Beach, instagram live, and now Heaven.

I love that I still have you on my team as part of clouds of witnesses to recall and be encourage when things get tough. I
am ... what you said to me "moving phnoms". Thanks for moving yours.

Romany

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Our hearts are so sad. We have only known Josh for a short time. But we admired how much he didn't try to just fit in. He stood out as an individual who wasn't afraid to be himself! One of the things that I always wanted my girls to learn was to not be afraid to be unique. He was a great example of that. He lived life freely and was so full of life! He was sweet and funny.  I loved the way he dressed and his awesome mustache! He always greeted everyone with a smile and was very hilarious! We will miss him very much! ❤️❤❤️❤ Trenton, Kathy, Alina

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Josh was a free spirit who new how to make u feel like u were actually worth say hi to and all ways managed to make u laugh. He was truly some to be reckoned with and now he's up shineing with all the stars in the night sky #blessed to have met such a beautiful soul ❤️

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People say that as you get older, your circle gets smaller as people become less important and everyone's lives start picking up. But no. Josh's life taught me that it is possible to cast your net BOTH deep and wide. His community is rich in knowledge and love of who he is. Is. Because he IS HOME. What it must be like to be reunited with our Creator. I'm feeling a million emotions regarding what God was/is planning? Why did it have to include this? Why? Why would this deep pain have to run through so many blood streams? Why do my people have to endure this? In what world is this fair?

Because Josh radiated joy. He exemplified life and lived his true and best self everyday. Josh taught me to live simply and wrestle with things that were difficult to comprehend. It would be refreshing telling him a story, because his perspective would be unlike any I'd heard. His mind uncanny. His out-of-the-box humor. His sacrificial mode of living. I had the opportunity of seeing him interact with the closest people to him- his family. I saw his deep love for each member. I saw the way he'd play with the kids, the way he stepped up to help, the way he brought a sense of the Lord's presence to every situation. He was grounded in faith. And now He is eternally in the Lord's presence.

So, Josh. Thank you for being my friend. For always making sure Liz and I were safe in our home. For bringing us donuts and tons of soda for our mini parties we'd love to host. Thanks for fixing my car when it broke down on me in Redlands. For staying up all night in the cold so I can drive it back the next day. Thanks for helping cook with me and Ruth when we went camping in Joshua Tree. Thanks for being a person I can trust. For the sheds book you got me for my 25th birthday. For accidentally adding me to the family email where I got to see how incredibly big your heart was.

-Mel

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This picture is from Paul's house. What I remember fondly from Josh is how smooth he was. He and I laughed over a drink about the situation. He was easy to talk to in every situation. He was always so loving. He was a great man.

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LA fair, from years ago. Hope to see you very soon my friend ✨

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I'll never forget when I met you for the first time. I saw you at the ride next to mine and thought your mustache looked cool, so I asked you to borrow your marker so I could write Martin Mystery on my hand and then later on you walked by me and showed me your hand and to my surprise you wrote Martin Mystery on your hand too. The next day you came to work and told me that you watched Martin Mystery and that it was cool and from that moment I just knew we were going to be good friends. I'll never forget all of the nights we spent in the parking lot just listening to music and telling each other silly stories or when I showed you ever single picture in my camera roll and then you showed me every single picture of yourself and we laughed about how different we looked now. You're really special to me you know? I told you that I didn't really have any friends and you told me you were my friend and that you would always be there for me and I knew you meant it. I think one of my favorite memories with you was being in the mall parking lot with April and Michael just trying to figure out what the heck we were gonna do with the rest of our night so you played some Beach House just like how you always did and you drove in circles. This picture is from that one night that I was blasting Drop it Like it's Hot and you got out of the car and started dancing and made all of us laugh because you had some pretty damn cool skills. I love you Chan, I know I will see you again. I'm gonna see Beach House next month and I know you will be there too. Till we meet again.

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On behalf of us all at castle park , I'd like to say we are so heartbroken without josh's presence at work . He was such a light and free soul he made us all happy. The memories we shared with him will last a lifetime. This video was from a few weeks ago-- it makes me laugh the most . don't ask where he got the lettuce head haha. You'll be missed Josh xx

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It is truly an honor to have been blessed by Josh's life, his laughter, love, and talents. I'm thankful to Leakana for introducing me to their family and allowing me to see Josh mature through the years. Josh can goof it up and do it 10x better than anybody. I will miss his laugh, his hugs, and that smile.

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Don't forget to write your name somewhere. We want to know who you are! Reading these sweet memories of Josh warms my heart. He was so so so loved. 

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Don't forget to write your name somewhere. We want to know who you are! Reading these sweet memories of Josh warms my heart. He was so so so loved. 

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It is beautiful to see how much the Chan's love one another through the hardships an beautiful times. It's a privilege to know each one of them, and to see the love they have for each other. I know there will be a big hole left with Josh's absence, but we will all try and fill it with stories of Josh, and live like he would have.

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The life of the party, the man with all the jokes whose authenticity could never be questioned. Josh was a light in this world that reflected God's love in such an amazing way. Through stories shared, laughter and the simplicity of his presence, Josh left an everlasting impact on life that has left me in awe of God's glory. I may never understand God's masterplan, but I do know that Josh is home with our Good Good Father. Goodbye Joshua Chan, I'll miss you dearly.

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The joy, love, and laughter you shared with everyone around you will never be forgotten. My fondest memory of you, which I’ve already shared, is randomly hearing you at the front door. All you said was “I just wanted to say hi to you and your mom.” Even if it was for 5 minutes, you used that time just to check up on my mom and I. Other times where I see you sitting on the couch just chilling, enjoying my mom’s cooking. Every little memory I can think of, is always full of joy and laughter. There has never been a bad moment with you, and that I am grateful for. Thank you for always showing your love and kindness. Thank you for all the laughter you’ve given me. Thank you for all the little hugs and chit chats we’ve had. I will cherish every single moment I’ve had with you. All the bonfires, church events, hearing you worship God. Seeing God’s love through you is something I will be cherishing forever. I will miss you dearly bong Joshua, and I will always love you.

-This photo is from the day after Christmas party in 2015. What better picture to have with him? It was always a warm feeling having him around.

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We we're shocked to hear about your passing...even though we only meet that one time at Soultruistic you have left a lasting impression with nothing but good vibes... Love you always festival brother..

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this is the only picture I've got with Josh in it. miss you mucho!!

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Hey Josh,

Remember that one time when we killed like 20,000 spiders as we were cleaning out the Riverside garage?  Man, that was such a freaky experience.

Or how about that time when you popped out your knee out while climbing a tree at church. I totally thought you were joking…. until it heard it pop back in…. ouch...

Or how about that time when grandma yelled at us for making a bonfire in the back yard. Man, I really miss those late night conversations with you. Thanks for always being an open ear and being so willing to listen to my heavy thoughts.

Btw, you never really did confirm what the heck are zeff kids… or if that was really you in that UCSD Khmer Romance video….

Josh, there are so many random, fun, strange, weird memories with you. I am so sad thinking about the realities of today. Your presence will be so dearly missed. I can’t believe that I won’t get to play Payphone by Maroon 5 in the car with you no matter what the year it is. Or hear you jamming out in your guitar shirtless in the living room. Or get those random 30 seconds  FaceTime calls out of the blue. Josh, I am really going to miss you. Damn, I am really going to miss you. You had such spirit of kindness and light. And your laughter, it was so genuine. Damn Josh, I can’t believe you’re gone. Josh, honestly, I am mad at God too. Did He really have to take you home so soon? There was so much more work to be done. Josh, you have a family who dearly loved you down here. You have nieces and nephews who adore you.  There was so much more for you to do here, so much more life that you needed to live. Dammit Josh, I question God’s will sometimes… but i know… i know that if you were here, you would tell me not to worry. Honestly, you probably say some weird joke, making light of your own death and laugh it off….

And I probably would’ve laughed. Josh, I am laughing and crying. Thinking about the man God created you to be. The joy that you brought to so many around. The laughter that you and I shared. Damn Josh, I am really going to miss you and your goofy, weird presence.

I know, I know you’re probably looking down now hurting that we are hurting. I know you would want us all to be happy, smiling, rejoicing that you are with our God. But you’re dearly missed down here you know that right Josh? You’re dearly missed down here...

Josh, may you dance so damn wildly in heaven with Jesus and the angels. May you jump up and down and shaking your booty like you have always down here. I know you’re in a better place, a place which we will dance together again. But right now, we miss you. And you being gone is such a shock. Hell, tears are blurring my vision as I write this. I am partly smiling and partly crying. Josh, may you find happiness. Your soul is where it should be and your memories are all we have left. thank you for your friendship and life. thank you for the kindness you've shown me through the years. thank you for making feel like family in times when I didn’t have any. Thank you for being a brother in more ways than you know. thank you giving me a place in your life. it was such a honor.

Let's do this one last time Josh:

“I'm at a payphone trying to call home All of my change I spent on you Where have the times gone? Baby it's all wrong Where are the plans we made for two? If happy ever after did exist I would still be holding you like this And all those fairytales are full of it One more stupid love song I'll be sick I'm at a payphone”

Farewell Joshua Rothanak Chan.

I love you.

Kenny Ung

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You were my best friend, as you were everyone's best friend <3

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You were my best friend, as you were everyone's best friend <3

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I thought we would grow old together. I remember when I first met you and Chris Fan at a UCSD mtg. about progressive politics on campus. I shared about my radio slot at KSDT, and you were inviting people to the "We'd Love Your Company" art program at the UAG. We started hanging out, and it was a dream. Reading everyone's post, it made me realize how special you made everyone feel. It's unbelievable how "present" you are for everyone. I remember when we took the bus from UCSD to downtown SD because I wanted to observe "the street life" -- and you went with, and were genuinely intrigued. I remember Kyong Park's art studio, and deconstructing wooden parts with you, and discovering that magical part of the exterior that made spaceship noises if you hit it. I remember staying up all night spraypainting the gallery walls, playing records, and watching weird surrealist foreign films with you and Tanner.. It was magic riding bikes with you and the crew. So much style!!

I went on a walk in Banker's Hill the other day, past the suspension bridge and remembered that day a group of us met up to eat tacos and pizza, ride bikes and skated around like street rats.

I thank God everyday I was able to see you for our last birthday together. Watching you jamm out at that Gnarburger Records show was great. You are such a light!

All the talks, dancing, partying at Hiroto's would not have been the same if it weren't for you. You were the reason I even stuck around for so long. You have an amazing quality of grounding me, but at the same time uplifting me. You are an angel, and I know you'll be riding alongside me in this mad beautiful world!

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UAG MANDEVILLE CENTER sungod UNIVERSITY CALIFORNIA WEST COAST UCSD LA JOLLA COVE KSDT INDEPENDENT RADIO STATION GROUNDWORKS CHE CAFE VEGAN CO-OP COLLABORATE GEISEL WARREN FIELD

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This aching in my heart is indescribable. I miss you. Sometimes I sit here and am flooded with all of our memories. Joshua, you were truly one of a kind. The way you saw the world was incredible. Even though you had horrible vision, you saw the little details in this world and reminded me of the beauty of life and the Lord. I remember the one time outside of Robert's first condo when you told me to pick up this shell in someone's lawn because it looked otherworldly. I didn't because I didn't want to trespass and I thought you were crazy. We got in a petty fight and we'd always recall that time and laugh about it. Josh, thank you. Thank you for always encouraging me to seek out the beauty in this world. Absurdity did not hinder you from pursuing what you found to be beautiful. We can all see this in your pursuit after Jesus Christ and also your insanely cool fashion sense. You taught me countless lessons that I will hold onto forever. Your dedication to and love for our family was unwavering. In the midst of this deep, deep pain, I find myself so very thankful for our time together. I honestly don't know how to express in words how grateful I am that God made you my big brother. You always tried your best to make me happy. Please remember the time you drove me and my friend to Hollywood to just get a glimpse of the Jonas Brothers. You would do whatever you could to make me happy. And then there's that time that you drove out to Azusa from San Diego just to have breakfast with me. And then that more recent time when you hand delivered donuts and milk to my classroom on my last day of my first year of teaching. I was sobbing as I dismissed my first set of students for the last time and you held me and told me how proud you were of me. You always made yourself available for me no matter what. I am recalling all of our memories and my heart aches for just one more moment with you. This is a picture of us on our Metro night. We just got off on a random stop and walked for hours. One of my fondest memories with you. We were both in challenging seasons in our lives and we made it a priority to sit with each other and remind each other of the reasons why we need to persevere through difficult seasons. We came to the conclusion that our lives are made to glorify the Lord's name, always. I don't know when life will begin to feel livable again. I don't know how to live in a world without you. I will call on the name of Jesus because that is what you modeled for me. I will use all of our moments and conversations to remind me to reach for the beauty that God shares with us each day. Your life, your creativity, your rhythm, your passion, your diligence, your kindness will be missed. I love you, Joshua.