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PURITY CULTURE: How are attitudes towards male and female sexuality differ within media

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PURITY CULTURE: How are attitudes towards male and female sexuality differ within media

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Today I rewatched the film "American Pie" to more vividly recall the events within the film that reinforce my points.

The film follows the male characters, Jim and his friends, pursue losing their virginity with eagerness and humor, showcasing a sense of camaraderie. Notably, the awkward yet comedic situations they find themselves in reinforce the societal acceptance of male conquest.

Conversely, the female characters, particularly Nadia and Jessica, face judgment and double standards. Nadia's privacy invasion and Jessica's experiences with slut-shaming highlight the societal notion that a woman's virginity is a precious commodity, subject to shame and social backlash.

For instance, Jim's webcam incident with Nadia serves as a stark contrast to the lightheartedness surrounding the male characters' pursuits. The aftermath of Jessica's intimate encounter further underscores the film's portrayal of the gendered consequences of sexual experiences.

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"Easy A" cleverly deconstructs traditional narratives around female sexuality, exposing the hypocrisy and double standards inherent in purity culture. Olive's adoption of a Scarlet Letter persona highlights the absurdity of society's obsession with female purity and the lasting impact of gossip on an individual's reputation.

The film serves as a reflection of societal expectations, using humor to critique the damaging effects of gossip and the commodification of virginity. Olive's journey prompts reflection on the consequences of deviating from perceived norms and challenges the societal judgments placed on young women.

As I reflect on "Easy A," I appreciate its satirical approach to purity culture, reputation, and societal attitudes towards female sexuality. This cinematic experience provides valuable insights that will shape my research on the portrayal of virginity in contemporary media.

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In my focus group the expectation and pressures surrounding virginity were discussed. The males in the group agreed there is a pressure around losing their virginity amongst their peers whilst the woman in the group stated there is certain shame surrounding losing theirs.

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https://digitalcommons.butler.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1021&context=bjur

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Shows a significant difference between how much more often women feel guilty after losing their virginity.

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Nectar Sleep surveyed Americans to discover how many sexual partners they had before settling down.

The average number for people who identify as men was 26, the average number for people who identify as women was 19.

But other studies have shown that people often lie about their number.

Comparing yourself to others is all too easy, especially when it comes to sex.

While sharing your number may be uncomfortable, it's easy to wonder about other people's.

There's an episode of "Friends" in which Monica's boyfriend Richard asks her how many people she's slept with . After telling her his number is two, she's embarrassed to share her higher number, clearly fearing judgment. This exchange leads Ross and Rachel to have a similar, equally awkward conversation, comparing their past.

While stigmas around sex are slowly dissolving, for many, these conversations can still feel incredibly uncomfortable and will be avoided at all costs. At the end of the day, however, it's natural to be curious about how many people others have slept with .

Nectar Sleep has released a study perfect for anyone wondering what their fellow Americans numbers are. Broken down by the gender binary, the survey asked participants who identify as men and women aged 30 and below how many sexual partners they had before "settling down." It wasn't clear the respondents' sexuality, or what they defined as "sex," and the only people surveyed appeared to be on the gender binary.

For those who identify as men, the average number of sexual partners was 26. The average number of sexual partners for those who identify as women was a bit lower, coming in at 19.

It's worth noting that these numbers are much higher than many previous studies, including one Superdrug, previously reported on by INSIDER, that put women at an average of seven and men at an average of six.

Data is usually hard to pin down because people also admit they aren't truthful about their "number."

Studies have shown that men often increase their "number" while women decrease theirs when asked, which can say a lot about our attitudes towards sex and gender. Also, "sexual partners" and "sex" can often mean different things to different people, especially depending on their sexuality.

So although we can only go off of what people respond to in surveys like this, it's definitely worth noting that these numbers can often be inflated based on who you ask.

No matter what, you shouldn't stress about your number

After reading all that data did you immediately compare it to your number? I know I did. While it's all too easy to compare yourself to others in every aspect of life, it's incredibly important to note that there is no "normal" when it comes to the amount of sexual partners you "should" have and sharing your "number" is up to you.

"If it's relevant to understanding what you both do and don't like sexually then that's important for physically communicating between the sheets, but if it's about tallying up who is more 'sexually experienced' then this will achieve nothing for your relationship," dating expert Sarah Ryan told HuffPost UK.

All that matters is that you are having safe and consensual sex that makes you happy.

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Here's how many people the average person under 30 says they've slept with - and why they could be lying

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It's easy to compare the amount of sexual partners you've had with how many others have. According to a recent survey, here's how many people the average person under 30 has had sex with. That being said, here's why you shouldn't stress about your number or anyone else's.

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Shows the expectation for the man to have a higher "body count". Also Joey is never criticized despite his character centering around his promiscuity.

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Every example here is shaming women.

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The well-loved sitcom, may still be popular among viewers today, but is widely regarded as having aged rather poorly in some instances. While the show may have tackled many topics that established it as progressive for its time, it has still not entirely stood the test of time. As the show follows the iconic six best friends navigating their lives, it presents a host of questionable, and often offensive, jokes.

RELATED: Friends: 10 Things From season 1 That Wouldn't Happen Now

Not least of the show's questionable qualities was the standard approach to female sexuality among the characters. While there are certainly some exceptions - namely in Phoebe's laid-back feminist approach to life - for the most part, Joey's womanizing was accepted and often praised, while the female characters often had to justify any hint of promiscuity.

When Rachel Kissed Two Guys

Unlike some of her friends, Monica is not usually one for flippant slut-shaming. On this occasion, however, for whatever reason, she makes an exception. In "The One Where The Stripper Cries," Monica learns that when she and Rachel paid a visit to Ross and Chandler at college when they were teenagers, Rachel ended up kissing both Chandler and Ross.

In response, Monica judgmentally remarks, "Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed." With this, Monica takes for granted that Rachel is a slut, outwardly judging her best friend, while also commenting that Rachel's cosmetic surgery may have had an effect on her relationship with men.

When Chandler Spends Christmas In Tulsa

Monica instantly becomes jealous when she discovers that Chandler is spending Christmas working with a female colleague (Selma Blair). Chandler remarks that Monica's jealousy, in this case, is completely justified, as the runner-up Miss Oklahoma makes a pass at him. As Chandler turns her down he says to her, "You're a really nice person, ham stealing and adultery aside."

Chandler appears to be positioning himself on some kind of pedestal here, as the married person who turns down the opportunity to cheat. He has been confronted with a fellow married person who tries to initiate cheating, and decides that although this speaks to her character, and he judges her for it, he still thinks she's a nice person.

In the very first episode, Monica goes on a long-awaited date with Paul the Wine Guy and spends the night with him. The morning after, Monica walks out of her bedroom with Paul in tow, and the two are greeted by Chandler, Joey, and Rachel in the kitchen.

As Monica says goodbye to Paul at the door, Joey remarks on how Monica had claimed that this wasn't a real date, yet Paul has spent the night, saying to her: "That wasn't a real date. What the hell do you do on a real date?" This scene paves the way for continued judgment around the sex lives of the female characters throughout the series.

When Rachel's sister Jill (Reese Witherspoon) comes to visit, she quickly strikes up a connection with Ross, which leaves Rachel in a predicament. Rachel realizes as Jill goes on a date with Ross that it is just too weird for her and she cannot accept Ross dating her sister. Rachel then proceeds to project her own issue onto her sister.

RELATED: Friends: 10 Major Relationships, Ranked Most To Least Successful

Firstly, when Jill is ready for her date with Ross, Rachel tells her that her outfit is "a little slutty," although the clothes are, in fact, Rachel's. Secondly, as Rachel spies on the date from Monica's window, she exclaims, "Oh she is a slut." Although Ross is single and Jill is essentially doing nothing wrong in this situation, Rachel turns her own discomfort with the situation into a cause for slut-shaming her own sister.

When Chandler's Parents Meet Again

The relationship between Chandler's parents is always acknowledged as a complicated one, and the first time the ex-spouses appear on screen together solidifies this. At Monica and Chandler's wedding, Chandler's father (Kathleen Turner) approaches Nora and openly shames her for her dress-choice, asking, "Aren't you a little old to be wearing a dress like that?"

Nora Bing (Morgan Fairchild) is often ridiculed for her casual approach to sexuality, and as such, this remark comes as no surprise. Her response, however, with which she openly disrespects her ex-husband's identity expression, asking, "Don't you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dress like that?" bringing to light yet another flaw in the sitcom's questionable relationship with diversity.

When Joey Meets His Match

In "The One With Ross' Library Book," Joey meets Erin (Kristin Davis), and much to Phoebe and Rachel's delight, he begins to develop feelings for her and considers pursuing a relationship. Unfortunately, however, Erin confides in Phoebe and Rachel that she does not feel the same way.

Erin approaches the subject word-for-word as Joey would, claiming that she doesn't really see a future, and essentially repeating Joey's earlier sentiments that he uses to get rid of girls the morning after their date. Rachel then judgmentally calls Erin a "tramp," disregarding the fact that Erin is simply treating Joey as he treats most women.

When Rachel Is Pregnant

In the early days of Rachel's pregnancy, she is feeling particularly maternal and volunteers to hand out the candy at Monica's Halloween party. Rachel is overly generous with the candy and Monica questions how quickly the bowl has been emptied, to which Rachel responds that one of the kids "said that she loved me so I just gave her everything."

RELATED: Friends: 10 Biggest Mistakes Ross Made In His Relationship With Rachel

Although Phoebe is often the least judgmental of the main characters, in this case, she retorts, "No wonder you're pregnant." In an attempt at humor, Phoebe has taken this opportunity to shame Rachel for her pregnancy in an entirely uncharacteristic way.

When The Saleswoman Flirts With Ross

When Rachel and Ross go shopping to prepare for the arrival of baby Emma, Ross gets hit on by the saleswoman who compares him to Indiana Jones. Rachel, in disbelief, recounts the story to Phoebe and calls the saleswoman a "whore." Rachel continues, "Here I am about to pop and he's out picking up some shop girl at Sluts 'R Us."

Rachel bitterly considers the idea of Ross dating other women while she is pregnant. Interestingly, Rachel takes the opportunity to refer to the potential girls that Ross would be dating as "sluts." Although Rachel's issue lies with Ross choosing to date while she is carrying their child, it is the girl that Rachel is condemning.

When Nora Bing Comes To Visit

In "The One With Mrs. Bing," Chandler's mother visits New York and Chandler's deep-rooted issues with her come rushing to the fore. Nora is the successful author of a collection of novels, but due to their raunchy nature, her character is ridiculed, most significantly by her son, who cannot accept his mother as she is.

Upon learning that Ross and Nora have kissed, Chandler expresses disgust at Ross while maintaining, "I expect this from her. She's always been a Freudian nightmare." While this particular incident may have indeed been unacceptable, Chandler expresses a blatant disrespect for his mother, shaming her openness and her success throughout the episode.

When Ross Doesn't Give Rachel The Message

While Rachel and Ross are living together during her pregnancy, Ross realizes that Rachel has started dating without telling him. Ross answers the phone and discovers that Rachel met a guy while out at a bar with Phoebe. He then takes it upon himself to withhold the message this guy left for Rachel, stepping in to prevent her from dating without telling her.

When Ross is confronted for having kept this from Rachel, instead of acknowledging any wrongdoing, he goes on to shame her for her actions. Ross says to Rachel, "I'm the guy who's taking care of our baby while you're out at bars meeting guys," and instead of admitting that he is jealous and acting in a petty manner, Ross maintains that Rachel is at fault, both slut-shaming her and attacking her role as a mother.

NEXT: Friends: 10 Jokes About Masculinity That Aged Really Poorly

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Friends: 10 Worst Times A Character Was Slut-Shamed (Ranked Least To Most Offensive)

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While Friends remains a popular series, there are aspects about it that haven't aged well, including instances of slut-shaming throughout the series.

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Highlights double standard directly.