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Recognizing Perfectionism and Patterns

Perfectionism is a trait that has followed humans throughout history. Since it has followed us for so long we have tried to make sense of it in a modern world. Thinking of ways to define it, how to combat it, how to live with it, how to get rid of it. We have this trait and it is part of the reason why we are able to achieve so much. Without it we might not be where we are today. Since it is still playing such a heavy role it has started to impact us in negative ways.

The basis of perfectionism is referred to as the act of engaging in motivation that lacks fun or play but gains reward from small incremental improvements and maintains perseverance during frustration. Perfectionism looks different for everyone and overwhelmingly it has negative effects.

Perfectionism is a topic that I felt was fitting during this point in my life. Being a student athlete at the University of California Berkeley has allowed me to have a mixed experience of both athletic and academic balance. Being surrounded by people that are going through a similar experience of working to balance the demands of academics and athletics at a high level. Perfectionism plays an even more noticeable role when it comes to college. Having experienced freshman year at UC Berkeley and expecting myself to perform at a high level. I will say perfectionism only got in the way.

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ChatGPT: Image description- Caveman carving a rock into a shape, he wants it to be perfect

Attention to detail can be traced back to over two million years ago. At a time we showed our attention to detail by carving stones and presenting them to our prospective partners. Perfectionism is rooted in many areas of humanity and it allows us to develop skills that could potentially be of use in many areas.

Looking at perfectionism from an evolutionary psychology perspective can help us see why this trait would be a benefit to humanity. We can not deny that it is something that makes us strive for greatness and excellence, in doing so humanity has been able to produce many things that we would have not if we did not want to perfect ourselves. In the idea of perfecting ourselves we have continued to advance. Having a trait like this during human evolution allowed for the development of survival skills. Perfection continued to evolve with us because it provided adaptational advantages.

When we look at the advantages that perfectionism brings we see why it can be good. If we look at it from the very beginnings of human civilization it provided us with the want to create very fine objects. Perfectionism is also rooted in the want to create objects that resonate with other people. Making an object with our hands that show our ability to focus on detail and see a project through. Perfectionism can be looked at as creating beauty within everything that you do.

A need for perfection allowed humans to master the skills that were most needed during a time where survival was crucial. Perfectionism following us in to the modern world has started to look different and it no longer serves the same purpose that it used to. Looking at the timeline of perfectionism allows us to see its wide range of affects.

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Perfectionist Trap

The idea of perfectionism has shifted in a modern world. We are no longer at a point where we are working to survive every single day. Humanity has evolved to the point where our creativity has been developed and we have many outlets to apply ourselves to. Our advancement has given us more comfort and more flexibility. Traits like perfectionism have not left us and we work with them everyday. On some occasions our perfectionist ideals can get in the way. Instead of being something that helps us advance and evolve it starts to be like a trap. We start to be held back by the very thing that is supposed to foster development and the want to achieve excellence. It is easy to have perfectionism limit you because the structure turns into judgement of oneself. Self criticism becomes what is battled and it is related to perfectionism. Perfectionism does not stand alone it also comes with overthinking and judgement of yourself. Perfectionism starts to become part of our everyday lives and the way that we operate.

Since there is a growing emphasis on perfectionism the world has become more challenging. People are being more harsh on themselves and it is affecting more parts of their life. No matter how much a person achieves they will still not be satisfied. In the past 50 years there has been an increase of focus on competition and individualism. There can be too much of a good thing. The want to achieve excellence is great but when it is compromising the way that you approach every life situation it is not good.

We are living in a world where perfectionism is on the rise because society is changing and the pressures are different. I took sometime to listen to a podcast on YouTube that is done by Emma Chamberlain, she is an American influencer but she takes time to develop a podcast where people send in topics that they would like to see discussed and this one was about failure, work ethic, and perfectionism. She discusses how she feels perfectionism holds her back. An area that I thought was interesting was how she discusses how she envisions herself in an alternate universe without perfectionism and she wonders how she would function. I think we all try and think about how our lives would be if we were less self critical.

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Wanting to achieve perfection and trying to decide what that looks like for each individual can be a challenging task. It limits us because we believe that it will never be achieved and that is the truth. A trait like this is good in theory but it quickly renders itself to a negative side because of the added pressure that comes with it. Having this internalized pressure makes it hard to complete tasks, mive past your mistakes, learn from your failures. Instead of using the trait in a way that will be productive it is associated with less productive and stagnant situations. Many negative emotions and actions are associated with perfectionism including aggression. A group of 1,815 Spanish students between the ages 8 and 11 were categorized into four groups that ranged from low to high aggression. The students that had the highest level of perfectionistic traits also had the highest aggression rates. Aggressive behavior changes with age but when a student is at such a critical time for developing personality. Students that had the highest perfectionism tendency also showed the most anger. Negative behaviors are associated with perfectionism and can affect people very early on.

The sooner that people know how to alleviate the pressure that they have from their internalized perfectionism the better off that person will be. If perfectionism comes on as an early trait for someone it would be a benefit to address this and get them the help that they need. Instead of living a large portion of their life struggling and overthinking. Many people with perfectionism have a hard time recognizing it and they let it continue. The earlier that it can be addressed the better because then people that are struggling will know how to manage it.

If people do not know how to manage the mindset it will continue to be a limiter. If you are constantly angered you will never know how you could operate without all the negative emotions and actions that are attached.

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Reframing Perfectionism: Knowing the Difference Between Absolute and Relative Perfection Can Alleviate Your Inner Struggles

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One of the questions I get asked most frequently is: what can I do about my perfectionism? People understand where it came from, but that doesn’t seem to be enough in order to challenge it. M…

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Cal Track & Field

The biggest reason that I decided to do my topic on perfectionism is because I feel that it is very fitting for the time that I am in right now and what the people around me are also going through. I am finishing my freshman year as a student athlete at the University of California, Berkeley. Having the chance to be connected with both academics and athletics has given me a different point of view of what it is like for people to operate and perform at this level. Being surrounded by high level athletes, being in classrooms where everyone wants to excel, and staying in the dorms with other freshmen. All of these experiences made me more aware of how much mindset plays into the way a person operates on a day to day basis. The way that a person approaches a situation like college with so much going on around you can be intimidating. It is hard to perform and always feel at your best when you put so much pressure on yourself. Most of the pressure is unnecessary too. You want to have the pressure and you want to achieve excellence but you have to have a balance. When there is not a balance and you focus too much on perfection you are your own barrier.

I am a member of the Universities Track and Field team. When I arrived I knew that there were a lot of high expectations and that I was expected to perform. Of course I wanted to show my abilities and I was going to follow the programs that were given to me and listen to all of the coaching that I received. I knew that I completely had it physically and the physical ability portion was not going to be a problem. After a while I started to accept that I needed to better myself mentally this is when I started to discuss my relationship with perfectionism and the amount of internal pressure I was putting on myself. I wanted to be open about how I was feeling and I found other athletes that have expressed the same struggles with their mindsets and how it has been hard to function in an even higher level environment compared to that of club or high school sports.

A lot of the perfectionism that I have is because of my love for throwing the hammer and I felt like I could do the sport justice. I liked to compete and I knew that I had the potential to do well. Coming to college was great at the start and I was making progress and then it quickly turned into questioning myself and if I was good enough. I noticed this from the other athletes that I knew as well. Living in the dorms meant that I was around other students and freshman athletes. Having my living situation be this way allowed me to meet and be around other student athletes.

The research that I conducted for this project involved me interviewing and conversing with other students and student athletes. I learned a lot about myself and about other people during my freshman year and more than I expected to learn too. I met people that I can say I do not want to lose contact with and I want to be in the know of what their life will be like and what updates they have.

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Two people that I talk to almost everyday are Leah Murphy and Emily Ramirez, they are student athletes and do women's water polo. When you connect with people that are going through the same situations that you are, it gives you a chance to connect and relate to experiences that are different from a lot of people on campus. The pressure that is involved can be a lot and you just need people to talk about it with sometimes. A lot of the conversations that we had would have happened at meal times or after everybody was done with their day. We would all finish training, weight lifting sessions, classes, team meetings, and then at the end of the day we would eat dinner. When talking with Leah she would express concern about the level that she is performing at.“ Playing water polo in college is a lot different than playing in highschool, you could be the best on your highschool team but then come to college and feel like you aren’t good enough”. Hearing someone say this is hard because you want everyone to have confidence in themselves and know they are talented. Being in a high pressure environment can make a person question their talent and it can be taxing mentally. Emily Ramirez has expressed her feelings about how the culture of college athletics has made her feel. “It is hard to stay in a positive mood when you feel nothing is working and it is easy to become stressed”. When people around you are being faced with challenges and they are trying to do their very best but they still are not seeing the results that they want athletically it is hard. Trying so hard and wanting something so bad can be counterproductive because you can never get in a proper flow because you are always pushing. I myself have had a hard time and questioned myself when stuff was not working and I believe now that a lot of it can be attributed to just how bad I wanted it and how  I was trying to accomplish it. It left me questioning and feeling dissatisfied with the work that I had put in.

Carolina Visca is a member of the Cal Track and Field team. She is a person that I have spent a lot of time with and have had many conversations about athletics with. One of the biggest things talked about involving athletics is what type of mental state and attitude you want to bring to the track. It is expressed that you should work to come to the track with the clearest head possible and the only thing that matters is the training that you are doing right then and there. Carolina has talked about how that task is difficult to do. “We are not robots and it is expected that we just leave everything that is going on outside of the track and not think about anything else”. In reality we are humans and the more we try to force ourselves to get into this mental state the less likely it will happen. At the basics the more you tell yourself to not think about something the more you will.

I can say that I have had similar experiences with being talked about how I should approach practice and how to be productive. In order to be productive at a practice you should be able to focus without any other thoughts. One of the biggest things I remember being told from this year from my coach Mohamad Saatara is "Whatever is going on mentally throw it in the trash so we can work". It was not new for me to hear something like this from a coach and I was not opposed to hearing it either because I really would like to focus and make the progress I believe I can. I spent a lot of time thinking about just not messing up the throw that I never just let go and feel what a throw would feel like without trying to control every part. For me perfectionism comes with a lot of control tendencies and if I feel like I can't do it properly I will be critical of myself.

I have questioned myself many times and wondered why I couldn't just do what was being asked of me and could not overcome the barrier. I had initially had a meeting with my coaches on February 5th 2025 about what my training was looking like and they all agreed that I had it physically, the weight lifting was going good, I was getting stronger. During the meeting Kayla Ferron, one of the cross country coaches who was sitting in, suggested that I address my thinking around the sport. “I feel like this is not a physical issue but it is mental, we know you completely have it physically”. I quickly realized that the thing that was holding me back was not physical, it was purely mental. I ended up telling myself that something was wrong with me. I fully thought that if I cared about the sport I would overcome this barrier. "If you cared about the sport you wouldn't be doing this to yourself". After that I took a lot of time to address my thinking around the sport. Taking time to meet with sport psychologists, therapists, I kept a journal. I really wanted to figure out how to create the best version of myself. This version of myself would get results, he wouldn't be self critical, he would enjoy the sport. After this time it was followed by. “I don’t deserve to say that this sport is my life because I am no good at it”. I spent time grappling with my spot in the sport and part of me was throwing every resource I had at it but it made me overthink everything even more. I devoted myself to figuring out my mentality around the sport and myself outside of the sport and I have made progress but I feel like it will always be an ongoing journey.

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Majoring in Perfectionism

Being in a high pressure environment like college lends itself to higher stress and anxiety. When you add perfectionism into the mix these become even more apparent. I feel that college life is a good way to see how a person is affected by perfectionism because college involves so many new experiences. You are not only here because you want to be educated, you are also balancing a social life, making sure you are giving yourself as many opportunities as possible, and also taking care of yourself alone for the first time potentially. When there is a lot of pressure and expectations happening to you and so many people around you it is hard for it to not become the normality and instill itself as almost a culture. Perfectionism can be categorized in many different ways. Between 1989 and 2016 socially prescribed perfectionism has seen an increase of 33 percent. This type of perfectionism is associated with the belief that people will judge you if you do not meet standards.During this time other-perfectionism which is categorized as putting unrealistic expectations on others increased by 16 percent. Categorizing perfectionism can help us realize the major differences and also the subtleties. Allowing us to become more aware of how they affect you and the people around you.

Perfectionist tendencies are associated with a higher level of difficulty when trying to complete a task. It also makes it hard to stay on track to make it to a goal. 52% of college students that responded to a study about perfectionism said that it negatively impacted their work and how well they could complete their goals.

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Instead of perfectionism serving the purpose of propelling ourselves and making progress towards completing a goal it is something that holds us back. Mental health is something that takes a toll when a perfectionist mindset is present. The negative effects of this trait can look like stress, anxiety, depression, anger, aggression, guilt, and eating disorders. Psychological wellbeing is affected by the negative parts of perfectionism.

When we look at the type of relationship that we have with perfectionism it is important to see what types of thinking and mental state help combat the state of negative thinking we are in. When perfectionism is combated with compassion for oneself this is when some of the negative aspects start to improve. You will begin to see less rumination, depression, criticism, and shame.

Since a perfectionist mindset does have the potential to bring a person so much psychological distress I see it fit that recognizing the patterns and the signs of this mindset early would be beneficial. There is a chance that a person's perception of what perfectionism is might not ever get to a state where it's so negative and detrimental to their state of mind.

Having a perfectionist mindset is really damaging because it doesn't allow you to access the full effects of the type of mental health support that you are receiving. Perfectionism interferes with the treatment of depression. It makes it more difficult to treat and it also takes more time to treat properly. Self critical thinking leads a person to judge themselves while they are actively participating in therapy.

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Perfectionism Is a Trap. Here’s How to Escape.

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Perfectionism among young people has skyrocketed, but experts say there are ways to quiet your inner critic.

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Overcoming Perfectionism

Since we have seen perfectionism on the rise we have also seen more communities being made to discuss what perfectionism looks like and how to deal with it. Doctors as well as influencers are making videos and posting them to youtube about how to deal with perfectionism on a therapeutic level and people also talk about their personal struggles with perfectionism. Dr. Mayim Bialik talks about how many people think of themselves as the easiest target and we are our toughest critics.When we do this there is no reason for external planning and we don’t have to think about revenge. Everything is internalized and we almost want to be the ones to hurt ourselves, “It is so much more fun to hurt ourselves”.

Through the time spent talking about and acknowledging the type of impact that perfectionism has on mental health we have come to create communities. The communities can be found on social media platforms like Youtube, Reddit, and Quota. Some of the time it can just be people looking for other people to relate to and they want to ask questions or get advice. People are willing and want to discuss with other people how they are feeling and the experiences that they have. A lot of the posts do talk about how perfectionism impacts other diagnoses like depression, anxiety, and ADHD. One user describes how this “toxic mix” makes them a serial procrastinator. When someone talks about perfectionism in this manner it is easy to see how it could quickly and easily take over many areas of a person's life and make it even harder to function.

Another post that resonated with me was how the word perfectionism can be changed to optimization thinking. You can use this type of thinking but you do not need to be optimizing every single part of your life at all times. Instead of overwhelming yourself you can think about it differently and reduce the stress and anxiety. Instead of demonizing the behavior of perfectionism we can reformat it so it can be used in a more productive and conscious manner that does not put strain on our mentality.

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Mindful Perfectionist

Choosing the topic of perfectionism that was very fitting to the time that I am in right now allowed me to see how it has affected me on a deeper level but also how it has affected the people around me. I wanted to show how intricate perfectionism can become and how it manifests itself. Society is changing and perfectionistic mindsets are becoming more prevalent. I want to be aware of how it affects productivity and more than anything I want to have the means to combat it. If I have the knowledge and understanding of perfectionism I have the potential to talk and help anyone that talks about similar experiences they have been through. I will continue to be a person that wants to be knowledgeable about things that affect people's productivity and gets in the way of them reaching their goals. Seeing a timeline of what perfectionism has looked like through evolution was interesting to me and I was eager to write a paper where I could see such a clear progression. Perfectionism has followed us into a modern society and the better we become at managing it the more we can use it to our advantage.