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Ready,steady,slow!
And thanks about the snails higiene

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Flash (it's the snails name)

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Ready, steady, slow

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talikng about the snail like a human and calling it Flash

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Ready steady slow
Flash because the snails are slow

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Ready,steady,slow

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It is it is an excadulated title with it suggest that snail racing is similar too the ashes

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'Suddenly he loses interest and stops dead

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Feed me to the birds

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Ready, steady, slow

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The fact the snails name is 'Flash,
And 'he really needs to come out of his shell'

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Slid his way in the Guinness Book

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When he loses interest it shows that he is opposite to what his name says

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The name as it is making fun of snails and how fast they travel

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The snails name is Flash

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Ready, steady, slow

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Come out of his shell
13 inch course in far from sluggish

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Ready, steady, slow shows the speed of a snail

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The writer begins as if it is a 2 normal people and one is introducing the other

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Grand nationals
Ashes
Death

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Grand national , the ashes , death and snail racing

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The joke 'he really needs to come out of his shell'. This is funny because snails have shells.

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It's joke the entire article is one big satirical joke

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Grand national, snail racing

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His personal hygiene could do with some improvements.

And how he is described as a sluggish snail.

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The writer introduces a charecter and makes them seem like a person but it is a snail and at the end they describe the snail leaving them and going to somebody else and possible becoming a champion

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His name is called Flash which makes it amusing as he is a Snail. Also, in the title it says "ready, steady, slow".

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The ashes (something to do with cricket

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His name Flash is meant to be ironic because Flash means the thing is very fast and a snail is slow

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"Flash" because they are slow not quick
"Come out of his shell" because they are stuck in there shell and can't get out

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"He really needs to come out of his shell"

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The joke is when Archie the snail slide his way into the Gusiness book of records

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The writer starts the paragraph with an ironic name on the snail and ends with an ironic word slimelight nor limelight

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Grand National and Snail Racing

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"In fact he really needs to come out of his shell" snails can't come out of their shells

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The grand national and the snail racing and the ashes.

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Starts as in they have only just met in the first paragraph but by the end of the text he has given " flash" away

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The writer has chosen to start and end the article very light hearted .

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Limes

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Grand National

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Most thrilling of sports the world snail-racing championship

Far from sluggish

Talk about snails not as garden pests but as revered champions

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The writer start with an opening text which is Ready, steady, slow this shows that the writer is describing how slow a snail takes part in a race.

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The ashes (cricket)
Grandnational ( horse racing)

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Grand national, Guinness Book,

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The grand national
And the ashes