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To grow, you must step outside out of your comfort zone.

I have been on a lot of flights during the past eight years, but there is one that sticks out in my mind.

After reading the previous sentence, it would be normal to assume there was an incident of some sort. Maybe there was severe turbulence, the landing was bumpy, or...

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If You Want To Grow As A Person, Live Abroad

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To grow, you must step outside out of your comfort zone. I have been on a lot of flights during the past eight years, but there is one that sticks out in my mind. After reading the previous sentence, it would be normal to assume there was an incident of some sort.

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There are a lot of lessons in store for those of us who pack our bags and move to live in a foreign country. In this post I'll be talking about what living abroad teaches us about friendships.

Because once we've moved away, it's not only about making new friends abroad. In the process we also learn to understand what kind of friendships fulfil us, alongside witnessing (sometimes painful) changes in the friendships that we already have in our lives.

Continue reading to find out about the things that life abroad has taught me about friendships.

1. LOSING FRIENDS AFTER MOVING ABROAD IS INEVITABLE

The hardest lesson that concerns friendships, and one that many of us are not prepared for, is that a number of people will simply drop out of our lives when we move abroad.

There you are in your new home and trying to get settled in a new country. You still reach out to your friends back home or in your previous expat destination - because who else are you going to talk to, right?

But more and more you come to realize that they're actually barely listening, barely interested, barely invested in seeing you do well.

Soon enough, the interactions become superficial, or the other person doesn't even make an effort to maintain the friendship at all. That person may even be you as you slowly give up on something that doesn't seem to work anymore.

There's a number of reasons why some friendships fade into oblivion.

It could be that your friendship was circumstantial (you went to the same school, worked at the same company etc.) and without that one thing in common, there isn't much to hold on to.

It could be that the person just can't understand your life choices, even if they'd like to be supportive. But because they can't relate, they also don't know how to continue to be your friend. Rather than address this with you, they choose to fade out of your life instead.

Or it could be that your choice to live in a foreign country triggered negative emotions in your friend. Your bravery to take off may have brought up feelings of jealousy or even a sense of betrayal. For many people, these are difficult feelings to work through, unless they have the tools to deal with them constructively. As a result, it's your friendship that ends up getting axed.

Living abroad teaches you that not everyone is meant to stay in your life when you choose to follow your own path.

Depending on the nature and length of your friendship, this realization can of course be incredibly painful. So make sure you take the time to be grateful and grieve for this friendship.
[RELATED POST] "Everyone keeps leaving": The truth about temporary expat friends
2. LIVING ABROAD TEACHES YOU TO RECOGNIZE 'YOUR PEOPLE'

Unless you intentionally move somewhere to be completely on your own, chances are that you're going to be putting a lot of energy into making friends and 'finding your people' in a new country.

Finding your people is not always going to be easy nor even straightforward.

You may be looking in all the places that you're used to - joining the same clubs, going to the same social events. But somehow you just don't click with others in the way that you thought you would.

You may actually push yourself out of your comfort zone and try out all sorts of new activities and ways of meeting people, but you just don't seem to make the kind of connection you're looking for.

Or your options in the area that you live in are so limited to begin with that you have to choose between spending time with people that you wouldn't normally want to hang out with or being on your own most of the time.

When your efforts don't lead to the kind of friendships that you're looking for, you start to realize what it is that you value in a friendship. As a result, you also learn to recognize those valuable connections faster.

Meanwhile, however, you also begin to value your long-distance friendships all the more. Which leads me to my next point.
[RELATED POST] Very common reasons why making local friends abroad is difficult
3. YOU LEARN HOW TO CHERISH AND KEEP A LONG-DISTANCE FRIENDSHIP

I'll be honest - I've resisted accepting the fact that after several years abroad, many of my most important friendships will always be long-distance.

For many years after moving abroad I had this idea that friendships, true friendships, only count when they are face-to-face. Everything else is destined to fail sooner or later.

Well, several years later, those same friendships that I thought would fall apart are still there.

You see, I've learned that it's not about how long you've been friends. It's also not just about shared experiences and whether you can spend time together in person.

It's all about whether the friendship is built on a true connection that makes it meaningful for both people to keep investing in the friendship, even if from a distance.

And so while I may not have the luxury of making plans to go out for brunch with my most favorite people in the world whenever I feel like it, I know that my long-distance friends have my back no matter what. I know that because they've proven it to me time and again.

When you realize that your long-distance friendships are just as, if not more, supportive than more circumstantial friendships, that's when you learn how to cherish and maintain those long-distance friendships in every way possible.

Although these friendships may not look like a "normal" friendship and give you any opportunities to go out and explore where you live, it's the quality of the long-distance friendships that really comes to count at the end of the day.
[RELATED POST] 'I feel so alone': How to get over expat loneliness What have you learned about friendships since moving abroad? Let me know in the comments below.

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3 things living abroad teaches you about friendships

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There are a lot of lessons in store for those of us who pack our bags and move to live in a foreign country. In this post I'll be talking about what living abroad teaches us about friendships. Because once we've moved away, it's not only about making new friends abroad.

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21 Living Abroad Quotes to Motivate Your Move - The Portable Wife

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35 Inspirational Quotes About Living Abroad for Expats - Migrating ...

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Title: 28 study abroad quotes from DreamStudies, students, and schools [Article]

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Found on Google from dreamstudiesabroad.com

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How Living Abroad Helps You Develop a Clearer Sense of Self

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In today’s increasingly globalized world, more and more people are choosing to live, work and study abroad — and this trend appears to be a good thing: Social science studies have shown that international experiences can enhance creativity, reduce intergroup bias, and promote career success. Researc…

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Here are some tips we've heard from expats about the best ways to make new friends in a foreign country:

1. Look for language exchanges - a great way to improve your language skills while meeting new people

2. Try a local dance class

3. Join a sports team, especially if it means trying a sport that's popular in your new home

4. Attend after-work socials with your colleagues

5. Join the parent-teacher association at your child's school and get to know the other parents

6. If you're single, don't be afraid to try dating - even if you don't meet a romantic partner, you may still end up making friends

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Disadvantages Of Living Abroad (And How To Overcome Them) | William Russell

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Here are some tips we've heard from expats about the best ways to make new friends in a foreign country: Look for language exchanges - a great way to improve your language skills while meeting new people Try a local dance class Join a sports team, especially if it means

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Living Abroad Teaches us the Power of Connections | Anna Noakes Schulze | TEDxIntlSchoolDüsseldorf

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Of the total, 168 were U.S. citizens, 326 were host-country nationals, and 346 were third-country nationals.

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The American School of Milan is an independent, coeducational day school, which offers an educational program from early childhood through grade 12 for students of all nationalities. The school was founded in 1962. The school year comprises two semesters extending from September to January and from January to June.

Organization: The school is governed by a 12-member board of trustees, elected for three-year terms by the Association of the American School of Milan. Membership in the association is automatically conferred on the parents or guardians of children enrolled in the school. The school is formally organized as a nonprofit association.

Curriculum: The curriculum is that of U.S. college-preparatory, independent schools and includes the International Baccalaureate Diploma Program. ASM is accredited by the Middle States Association of Colleges and Schools. Elementary students make continuous academic, social, and emotional progress in a collaborative environment and have specials that include Italian instruction, science lab, art, music, PE, and library visits. Elementary students utilize iPads, while laptop computers are used in grades 6-12. The school is the testing center in Northern Italy for the College Board. The testing program includes SAT Reasoning and Subject, SSAT, and PSAT. Instruction is in English. The academic program includes an extensive interscholastic program, film, music, digital photography, robotics, computer science, TED-ED public speaking, student government, Model United Nations, and lifetime sports instruction. Nearly 100% of the graduates go on to universities. The elementary and secondary schools were reaccredited in 2016 by the Middle States Association of Colleges and Schools.

Faculty: In the 2022-2023 school year, ASM has 160 total staff including 104 teachers, 76 of whom are U.S. citizens, 17 host-country nationals, and 11 third-country nationals from UK, Ireland, Scotland, Bulgaria, and Switzerland.

Enrollment: At the beginning of the 2022-2023 school year, enrollment was 840 (EC1-12). Of the total, 168 were U.S. citizens, 326 were host-country nationals, and 346 were third-country nationals.

Facilities: The nine-acre campus has three main, interconnected, two-story buildings. There are three learning divisions: early childhood (preschool-PK), elementary school (K-grade 5), and upper school (grades 6-12). The self-contained campus has a film studio, a well-equipped library/media center, 70+ classrooms, nine science laboratories, two science preparatory laboratories, four music rooms and four soundproofed practice rooms, two art suites and an IB art laboratory, a renovated cafeteria, a totally new 500-seat auditorium, two double gymnasiums, a dance studio, a climbing/bouldering wall, a weight room, a soccer field, an outdoor tennis court, basketball courts, and an elementary and early years playground.

Finances: In the 2022-2023 school year, about 95 percent of the school's income derives from regular day school tuition. Annual tuition rates are as follows: EC: 13,500 Euros; K-2: 16,500Euros; Gr3-5: 18,000Euros; Gr6-7: 20,200Euros; Gr9-10: 21,800 Euros; Gr11: 23,100Euros; Gr12: 23,400 Euros. These fees are payable in euros. (All fees quoted in euros.)

: Download the Special Needs Profile ( Special Needs 2023 Special Needs- Italy, Milan) for this school to learn more about their capability to support students with exceptionalities.
This Fact Sheet is intended to provide general information. Prospective users of the schools may wish to inquire further of A/OPR/OS or contact the school directly for more specific and up-to-the-minute information. Information and statistics are current as of September 2022 and provided by the school.

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Milan, Italy: American School of Milan: 2022-2023 Fact Sheet - United States Department of State

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The American School of Milan is an independent, coeducational day school, which offers an educational program from early childhood through grade 12 for students of all nationalities. The school was founded in 1962. The school year comprises two semesters extending from September to January and from January to June.

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Ethan Houston: The Power of Growing Up Abroad

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Ethan Houston will be talking about the effects of never living in one place for more than a handful of years and the advantages of traveling and being exposed to different cultures and languages from a young age.