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Society has a tendency to place individuals in roles based on gender.  Sometimes this is done subconsciously without one even realizing it.  For example, girls and women are often expected to cook while boys and men are expected to do yard work etc.  However, we must realize that there are no specific roles that any gender should be assigned to.  I am very fortunate that I live in a home where no demands are placed on me solely based on my gender.  However, I have seen many examples of gender roles stereotypes in school and in media such as a school nurse being a female and caring  or the male doctor who is strong and intelligent.

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Men are expected to be tough and not exhibit certain emotions. Due to concepts of  hegemonic masculinity, men are expected to be in control and never cry or show weak emotions.  Much like a donut has the filling inside which cannot be seen, men also have emotions and pain that society does not let them exhibit.  I come from a Middle Eastern culture where men hold hands as signs of friendship or cry when faced with helplessness or loss.  However, in American culture, men do not hold hands with a male friend as their masculinity or sexuality would be threatened or questioned.  I find it perfectly acceptable for a man to hold hands with another as a form of bonding and connecting to make a friendship stronger.

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Being a cisgender female in a male dominated society, there are many inconsistencies in how to behave.  For example, I must dress in a feminine way to be accepted but at the same time not draw negative attention to myself.   In addition, the media gives conflicting messages.  A woman must be free to express herself and only then can she be happy. However, there are so many obstacles placed in front of women so that it becomes virtually impossible to attain happiness.

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Women are often victims of violence.  If a woman speaks out against patriarchal oppression, she is often personally attacked.  Many times, women use social media platforms to speak out against injustices.  However, they are threatened with rape or even death.  I have learned from an early age to be very watchful of what I say or do online.  Even thought the message I want to convey is within my rights, individuals will stop at nothing to degrade, insult and even physically harm me.  The rage directed towards women continues to rise.  Because of anonymity, online trolls have come more brazen and women continue to look for ways to express themselves without putting their lives at risk.

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Those who identify as transgender, nonbinary, homosexual, femme, butch, or  bisexual are often victims of violence.  Many are ostracized by society.  Only recently have their voices started to be heard.  Due to patriarchal concepts of what society should be, many times those who don’t “fit” are discriminated against, killed, hurt or even forced to hide their true identity.  I strongly believe and support the notion that every individual has a right to define their own happiness.  One day there will be a utopian society where there are no gender roles or gender norms.  Every person will have a right to choose how they want to live their best life.