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Hi, Lex! First off, your usage of elevated sophisticated vocabulary really made your paragraph strong. For example, the transition  words you used like “Namely” “However” and more transition words that make your paragraph be stronger. In addition, you used strong and powerful words throughout your paragraph.  A suggestion that I can offer for improvement is to add a space after a comma so it makes it look better, also, remember that there is always a space after a comma or a point.

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Hi Lex! First off, your figurative language is on point  and you used great word choice while completing the theme analysis. To add, you also wrote things in clear sentences that helped me understand what you were saying and trying to tell the reader. But one wish that I do have for you is to expand your writing a bit more and try to write all evidence and explanations with a complete CEEEES paragraph. You did great!!

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Hi Lex! First off, your figurative language is on point  and you used great word choice while completing the theme analysis. To add, you also wrote things in clear sentences that helped me understand what you were saying and trying to tell the reader. But one wish that I do have for you is to expand your writing a bit more and try to write all evidence and explanations with a complete CEEEES paragraph. You did great!!

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Hi Alexa! First off, your usage of elevated word choice really made the paragraph strong. Words like “loyalty”, “expectations”, and “negative attitude” really enhanced your theme analysis paragraph. Also, in my opinion, you explained the evidence really well, and it explained the theme, that there should be kindness and one’s actions will affect them in the future. A suggestion that I can offer for improvement is to add quotation marks around your evidence, and check the spelling of some individual words. This way, the readers don’t get confused while reading your paragraph.

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Hey lex its lex!! A star for your paragraph was your claim “ones actions will later affect one’s future” i thought that this was a really good claim that fit well with the Pixar short the birds. It was also really true in the Pixar short that actions did affect there future. Another star for you was the word choice you chose. For example “namely” or “to clarify” i thought were really good word choices that you chose. One wish could be your explanation because i feel like you could do more show not tell in it. For example you said everything good but you could of said it in different words to make it a bit better. Overall lex you did really good job!! -lex

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Hey Lex! I loved your timed piece! A strength of your paragraph was  your very elaborate and creative explanation. I loved all the details you added. For example, I loved it when you said “Their kindness and loyalty to the tall bird was very low after all the times they viewed him differently.” Another strength was your very detailed claim. You had a strong vocabulary that you added that makes perfect sense to what you were explaining to your reader. One wish would be if you expanded your word choice. You could have added more strong and bigger words to your paragraph.

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Hi lex! A strength of your theme analysis paragraph, “Bound to fall in love with yourself” is all of the unique and creative transitions you used. In particular, I enjoyed reading your analysis paragraph on how you wrote how important it is for people to know that you should be upset or judge other people because of their looks. In addition, I like how you were descriptive in some parts. For instance you said, “He learns to live with it and not let his image take advantage of how he should view himself. Indeed, this moment establishes the theme deeply as it shows that the way one views their outward appearance should not negatively impact their attitude toward themselves.” Here, you really tried to tell the reader how important it is to ignore things even though they could be difficult. However, a suggetion that I can offer for improvement is to make it more into “Show Not Tell” so your analysis paragraph can be stronger.

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Hi,Alexa! A strength of your theme analysis paragraph “Bound to fall in love with yourself” is your word choice. For example when you say “In the end, the evolution that is throughout the story Boundin goes to show every individual is different but one must make the absolute best out of it!” I feel that the way you word this is very efficient and silkey not hard to read like others. I also think that some of the words you choose stood out like evolution because it sums up a couple words into one word.In addition, I like the way you put life lessons into your story because when someone reads it they will learn something they didn’t know before reading it. For example when you say “One must be what they like and not what others want.” I feel that this is a very good life lesson and it can teach someone to be themselves and not to change just to fit in. I also think that when you add life lessons in it it will make anyone who is reading it think about it and what the benefit is . However, I feel that if you added better words instead of bland words it could’ve been better. I feel that there were some parts that had some good choice of words but most of it was just plain old words. For example “Not everybody is born to be the same, at least one must be unique!” I feel that you could’ve added a couple words here like you could’ve changed uniquely ,everybody.

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Hey lex, it's Eva L. You did amazing on your theme analysis. You expanded on your explanation and wrote lots of good meaningful themes to support your claim and evidence. To add you also made sense when writing your explanation. It was clear and easy for me to understand. One wish I have for you is to add just a little more figurative language but overall great job! 

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Hey lex, it's Eva L. You did amazing on your theme analysis. You expanded on your explanation and wrote lots of good meaningful themes to support your claim and evidence. To add you also made sense when writing your explanation. It was clear and easy for me to understand. One wish I have for you is to add just a little more figurative language but overall great job! 

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Hey Alexa!  You did really well in your piece. Something that stood out to me the most was how you used repeated language. I thought this made your piece show the theme really well. Here is an example of your repeated language, One should not be insecure about one's appearance, just make the best out of it. I liked how you said this a lot but not to much to overwhelm the reader. Another thing that stood out to me was your transition words. You used unique transitions. Here’s an example of a transition I liked, to further elaborate. This stood out to me the most because it was a great transition! Something I think you could have changed would be looking at your spelling and grammar again. You had a couple missed spelled words. Overall your piece wa great!

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Hi lex! I think that one star in your writing was your claim because your claim matched your short clip good and made sense. Another thing you did good was your conclusion because your used different words from your claim from your conclusion. A wish could be your word choice your could of done some other words. But overall you did really good!-lex

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Hi Alexa! A strength in your paragraph, “Bound to Fall in Love with Yourself” was all the detail. In your explanation, you added tons of detail to help the reader understand what you are trying to say. When I read your explanation, it was very elaborate and clear to what you were saying. Another strength was your strong word choice. I saw in your claim you used the word “truly indicates”. I thought it was a great word to add. It makes the piece stronger. I couldn’t find anything in your piece that you can improve on. Great work!

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Hi lex! You essay was great givin the amount of time you had to complete it. It gave a good vision of what would happen in a real life situation. The next thing is you also add amazing reasons why pets should not be aloud into the classroom. One wish I have for you is that you try to dedicate a little more time for you CEES paragraphs and you conclusion paragraph! - Eva La Rosa

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Hi lex! You essay was great givin the amount of time you had to complete it. It gave a good vision of what would happen in a real life situation. The next thing is you also add amazing reasons why pets should not be aloud into the classroom. One wish I have for you is that you try to dedicate a little more time for you CEES paragraphs and you conclusion paragraph! - Eva La Rosa

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Hi lex! I really liked your essay and I thought that you described everything really good! Something else that you did good was your intro was really distributive! Overall good job! -lex

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Hi Alexa! A strength of your piece was how detailed it was. I thought you did so well on explaining all of your opinions. You did not use any personal pronouns and you made everything perfect. Another thing I liked about your piece was you made sure the reader was getting hooked to your piece. It worked!!! However, something I thought you could have done better was making sure everything wa spelled out correctly. Overall you did really good!

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Hi lex! The strength of your essay is in how you described your essay that I could understand everything without any questions. In addition, I like the way you described in your own words what you think about how homework is not our future and how you support kids that think that homework is not good or helpful for our future. However, a suggestion I can offer to your essay is to improve more in “Show not Tell” so your essay can become even better then how it is now. Overall, you essay was one of the best ones I read!

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Hi lex! Something that I really loved about your story is how descriptive you are on people's motions. I don’t have words to say how good this story is. I felt like if I was there. I loved how you used S.T.E.A.L in your story. For instance, when you wrote in your story about Meg rolling her eyes when she saw the truck outside I thought there was someone that Meg doesn’t like but that person came to see her because she didn’t go to school. However, I don’t have any wishes because for me your story lex was perfect. I love it!

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I enjoyed your piece and it was interesting to read and your descriptive and figurative language was great.

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The strength in your memoir is the word choices! This is the best word choice I have ever noticed. Your words that you used to show your emotions for the game are so nicely done. You really described the players and the things around you and how the sun was so bright it was a spotlight on the goal. Your next strength is the way that you described things for instance the way you described how nervous you were but ended up saving the goal. You also really showed that happiness is little but it's good to feel happy in all kinds of ways! I don’t think there are any other mistakes. I loved your peace lex!

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The strength in your memoir is the word choices! This is the best word choice I have ever noticed. Your words that you used to show your emotions for the game are so nicely done. You really described the players and the things around you and how the sun was so bright it was a spotlight on the goal. Your next strength is the way that you described things for instance the way you described how nervous you were but ended up saving the goal. You also really showed that happiness is little but it's good to feel happy in all kinds of ways! I don’t think there are any other mistakes. I loved your peace lex!

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A strength in your memoir “The Last Whistle Blow '' was your beginning. I loved your show, not telling moments, the description was on point. I also loved the figurative language. I also loved how you described the moments leading up to when that person was trying to make a goal, and the emotions you were feeling. My only smally critique would be as the girl was shooting, I wish you would have stretched that moment out a bit more. Overall, amazing job.

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My favorite line from your piece is when you explain what you felt at that moment. One of my favorite things is when you knew that you made your team proud of you and of how you worked on your practice days. In addition, I liked the way you described the moment it was happening and how it made you feel. Because of your figurative language it makes me feel that I’m in that moment, it also made me feel like your feelings were on me. However, a suggestion that I think would have been good is if you could write “show not tell” so your memoir becomes more interesting than how it is.

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I like how you did the detail that was describing how you felt when this happen to you it was a good idea when you put “lets go LEX!’’ My team shouted I’m not going to save it and all my team's hard work is going to go down the drain.I remembered like it was yesterday she would try to shoot low every time.Go for the low corner,fast fast fast. And how it was showing how you can really put a lot of hard work into it with the things you were thinking.a nother thing is how you put more about what you were feeling like when you put the opponent in the corner of my left eye. My fear of not saving it flew across my brain. “Let’s go LEX!” My team shouted. I'm not going to save it and all my team's hard work is going to go down the drain. I remembered like it was yesterday she would try to shoot low every time.Go for the low corner, fast fast fast! I hear again,“You got this Lex!'' As I am in stance I remember all the steps and start praying and hoping for me to save it.It had all of the different things you were feeling in that moment.i wish you would described more about when you saw the ball in the stick at the moment

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I like how you really wanted to save it from getting in the goal and how you said your full name to show how you needed to save it. I also like how you have a lot of inner thought in your head and say in your head you have to do it. I also really liked you ending and how you saved it from getting in the goal and everyone was shouting your name.

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I loved your story and i really liked how you explained all the thoughts in you head and all those feelings. I also loved how you explained how everything looked. I just think that you should explain your surroundings a little bit more because i really want to k now what everything looked like. But besides that i loved everything els. I all so loved your ending and I loved the lesson you learned