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I could never find a happy place, that happy medium. I was basing every action and thought off the validation of others and never seeking my own. I was trying to be more than I could handle, just so I could be accepted and loved. I grew up to be a very alpha type woman but I was also a huge giver and lover- this put me in relationships that degraded my strength because they were intimidated by it yet they knew I would give everything I had. Mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, I was drained. I was lost and felt unloved, and unnecessary- a lost cause. I wanted to be a voice for other women however, and this was one of my saving graces and callings. Now I can attest because of my stories, whether that be abuse, sexual assault/harassment, or the parts where I felt I could never please anyone, not even myself. I wanted to have daughter one day so I could teach her about the reasons we continue our fights.

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I have learned about so many new coping mechanisms, resources, and points of views from others. It's a class I believe every should take. I didn't realize I was going through a rough patch with myself until this class pushed me to really think about my own health and mental state. The students have been positive, and this had pushed me to see a brighter future for myself and even my relationships, body, and overall health!

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I am in a much more stable place now, slowly but surely growing into the women I hope to be someday. I have my fair share of obstacles with acceptance of my body, trusting the process and embracing the "flaws" I have. I have recognized what the standard of beauty is in society and although it preaches to love our natural bodies as they are, it seems they only uplift those with the most opposite of natural. I am closer to peace with myself and understanding that the standard can be whatever I deem for myself. Nobody else is me! My anxiety and overthinking has costed me happiness in the past but today I am grateful for recognizing the help I needed. I am proud I never spiraled down next to others who didn't want to move or change for the better.

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I look forward to my future now, I can see myself thriving and truly living out my potential. I will have accepted my body and learned that the bad days are temporary. I am in control of my thoughts and have the ability to take hold of the reins. I have worked hard to get here but everyday I understand that there is always more to learn and more challenges ahead. I face adversity with poise. I look forward to being a mother and a wife one day, where my husband and children look up to me and see how strong I am as a human and as a woman. I want to be an example that where I started didn't have to follow, I was able to create a new life for myself.