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My oponion is Tika.

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Tika

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The last part, when Tika said, "I'm glad I spoke to you again."

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The last part, when Tika said, "I'm glad I spoke to you again."

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Tika

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Tika

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My friend was a little bit like Kiandra. I made sure I talked to her to make her feel better.

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My friend was a little bit like Kiandra. I made sure I talked to her to make her feel better.

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Tika

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Most likely i have non favorite part at the storry.

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My favorite part was when Tika comforted Kiandra and saying everything was gonna be ok.

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I was always a care free person, not many could get me troubled, so no. Although I often help with people who do have those problem, it was truly great to help others at my time as a PIK (Pusat Informasi Konseling) agent of my school.

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Thankful, the world is more beautiful then most would notice it.

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Thankful, the world is more beautiful then most would notice it.

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It brings me great joy to find people who care just like me to the stress of school and life in general.

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My favorite part was when the ending

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The Plot, the character development, and to show, not tell.

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The Plot, the character development, and to show, not tell.

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It was a great educational tool to help bring your presentation together, not the best story. The plot, although not bad is not great. I recommend adding a few more times where the main cast interact with each others, and maybe add more dialog before sharing her mental illness, as most would not give out that information freely as it is an extremally uncommon and private topic to most.

The character development feels extremely rushed. Although is not easily fixed would greatly increase the satisfaction and quality of your short story. I would recommend giving your story a few more paragraphs to flush out the characters.

Last but not least, I recommend you to read/watch videos about 'Show, don't tell.' as it would greatly increase the ambience of your novel and would make it seams that we are there, in person talking to a sad girl on the verge of tears do to the stress of school. Add the rustlings of the wind, how it gently lift the Kasandra's hair, how she hug her legs, or how she seams to be unfocused. Add additional details, slow down and try to 'live trough the memory' of the story.

That is all from me, I hope this helps.
-Eldest Frog.

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Tika

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Tika

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tika

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tika

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I really loved the ending especially when kiandra said "im glad I talked to you again."

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My favorite part was when they sit together in the garden and talk properly for the first time.

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Mixed feeling of emotions, I felt sad, happy, and relief.

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I do relate to Kiandra alot since im always the perfect student and all but im still struggling to get through it :). especcially like when something big like exebhition is happening.

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mixed abit of happy, sad.