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My full name is Chella Marie Yap. I'm 17 y/o and I completed my Junior High School at University of the Immaculate Conception.

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One fun fact about me is I am an introvert. I like to be alone most of the time because I feel like I am free of the burden of what other people might think of me.

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My favorite color is green, and my favorite fruit is strawberry. I love to cook, play sports, and watch movies and tv shows especially racing. I also like to read storybooks and novels mostly about dystopian and fantasy.

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My mother is pure Filipino and my father is half Chinese. I have 2 siblings, a sister and a brother.

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My father is currently in another country working as an OFW, while my mother is a house wife who takes care of us.

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My family and I may have a complicated relationship, but I love them more than anything. Everything that I'm doing is for them and I wish to succeed in my journey to make them happy.

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I never would have believed you if three years ago you told me I'd be here...

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Dear Future Me...

Life hasn't been very good to me lately. I hope that life's treating you well there in the future. I've always wondered what will become of me in the future. I like to think that I’m a simple person. I want to envision myself with a simple, happy life. A house with a farm. Many chickens and horses because I’ve always wanted to ride on a horse. I want to live a peaceful life away from everything. Just thinking about that makes me happy and at ease. But let’s be real. With the economy right now, I wouldn’t last a day in that kind of life, because everything has a price. I always wondered what will I become in the future. Specifically my job or my status in life. Ever since I was a kid, I like to think that my life has been laid out, and all I have to do is follow the path. But right now, it seems like I'm lost. I didn't really have a passion in Medicine. It’s just what I say becuase it's common. But in reality, I don't have a career that I really want to pursue. Because my Father wanted me to become a Doctor, I agreed. He didn't force me, but because I didn't have anything in mind, I went for a Stem Pre Science strand. Now, that I'm in my second year of Senior High, I think, I finally found what I want to pursue.

For years, I've always hated Mathematics. I always thought that it was useless studying different kinds of equations that I surely know that I won't be using everyday in my life. I didn't get a failing grade, but it was my lowest out of all subjects. I also thought that I never wanted a course with many Maths in it, because surely, I will fail. But things may not always go as planned. Right now I want to take Engineering as my course in college. My younger self would've never believed it, because why would I want to take a course that can I barely pass? I've read a book by Mark Manson that really hit me deeply. Its not about what you want to be in life, its about what you're willing to struggle. And I just realized that Engineering is what I am willing to struggle for. I may not be good at Math, but I'm willing to study everyday, learn, endure sleepless night, make mistakes and learn from them.

Right now, I may know what I want, but tomorrow is not clear and certain. There can be many things that can change. Whatever I’ll become in the future, I trust in God’s plan.

So, future me, I have quite high hopes that everything is great over there. I wish that all my hard-work will someday pay off. Goodluck to us!

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the end ;)

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My infancy years were blank. It is because I don't remember any given that I was only a baby. I was the last to come out of my mother's womb as I am the youngest out of all three of us. I didn't have much pictures when I was a baby, but seeing them makes my heart warm. I would wonder what kind of baby I was. I asked my mom, and she said that I wasn't too loud. She even told me that I was too eager to go outside of her womb even though the doctor wasn't present yet. I may not remember anything in this stage, but it will always be a part of me as it is the beginning of something special.

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If my infancy years were blank, my toddler years were a blur. I remeber some things, but just fragments of them. I guess this was the time were I first started talking and walking. I remember times where I would mumble different things and people wouldn't understand. This was also the stage where me and my siblings would play different kinds of games we made up. Like dressing up using blankets and malongs to have a fashion show. Recreating WWE stunts on the bed, and playing on the computer aleternatively because there was only one. I also remember the times where my uncle would buy me balloon and I let it slip in my hand and I would watch as it flies into the clouds. My first realizations. I think about that balloon alot and a song occured to me. I should have bought food instead of a useless balloon. It taught me that needs are more important than wants.

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This stage was the time I developed talking skills and other knowledge when I first went to school. Growing up, I always remember that I'm a shy kid. I never speak with anyone unless they speak to me. So in preschool or kindergarten, I spent most of my time just observing people. I still made friends but I was mostly alone. There was a playground in our school, and an inflatable pool. So whenever we went out to play, I was excited, and even when it was time to go, I didn't want to, but I had to. Going to playgrounds always gets me excited, especially when it's with my sister, bacause I could show her who I truly am without the burden of other kinds judging. This was the stage that I learned discipline.

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Life in elementary wasn't a walk in the park. I also wouldn't describe it as hard either. This stage was the "fitting in". Specifically in 6th grade. In early stage of my elementary years, I had the same attitude, same mindset and same personality when I was at preschool. I was a snob, a quiet, sometimes playful girl. In short, I didn't care about people that much, but I wouldn't show them the whole me. But when 6th grade came, I became a whole new person. It was because I met new people. I changed because of the people around me. I was fitting in with them, this was the time where I was very social, I had a lot of friends. But it took me a year to realize that they weren't good for me. I had to learn things the hard way, that having many friends isn't all that, and I was able to overcome their influence.

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                                           The Uphill Climb of my Journey

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                                           The Uphill Climb of my Journey

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This is the last stage of my life, as of the moment.

Although this stage is not completed yet, it has been a blast. My JHS years were kind of blipped, because 2 years is online learning. Much has changed during those 2 years, and when I was back to face-to-face classes, it was sort of scary. I became more conscious to people. I was scared to go out of the room and greet my old friends. I had a small group of friends which I can be myself. Some people said that I've changed and became more nicer than before. I guess that's true. I've evolved and made changes for the better. I understand people, not judging based on what I see. I didn't use to curse more often and would chastise people who would always curse to other people. I guess part of my change is because of my best friend. We would always see each other therefore I was influenced my her kindness. Also made me realize that she's the only friend I need in this cruel world. A lot has happened in 9 and 10th grade. I laughed, cried, been disappointed, angry and happy. It was one of the best years in my life because I was at my prime.

SHS was different. It was a bigger environment than before, but I learned to adapt and manage the hell I've been through. To classmates, teachers, and hectic schedules, I've learned to manage my emotions and my time management. People that made SHS bearable was my friends. They assured me that they'd accept me wholly. I became different compared to my JHS years, but I became a little more confident and independent. With my friends around me, I feel like I can show everything. SHS might not be what I expected, but I hope to explore more and have fun during the last year of being a high school student.

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1. Was the subject Personal Development helpful for you? How did this subject help you know yourself more?

Personal Development subject has been helpful for me. It made me reflect about my personality, behavior, and attitude towards others. It made me more aware about myself, and help me understand about what I am feeling. Lastly, this subject helped me in my problems and my mental health. It made me feel that what I am going through is part of my journey in becoming a better person.

2. What were your key takeaways from the subject?

My key takeaway is that I realized it’s okay if I don’t want to talk about things that are sensitive or painful for me, like topics about mental health or family. In our subject, I learned that it’s normal to feel that way, and that I can still process things in my own time without forcing myself to open up right away. Personal Development really opened my eyes about the things that are often overlooked in my life and it made me stronger in mind and body to face everyday struggles as a teenager.

3. What two topics were your favorites and why?

My two favorite topics was Knowing Oneself and Career Pathways. These topics helped me in really getting to know my true self. Knowing Oneself made me more natural about how I behave, knowing that being myself is enough and that I don't have to pretend for people to like me. Career Pathways showed me the reality and the struggles for career I want for the future. It made me want to work harder everyday to give myself the life that I deserve.