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FAMILY MATTERS: DO OBLIGATIONS ENCOURAGE TEENS TO PLAY IT SAFE? -Advik 

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FAMILY MATTERS: DO OBLIGATIONS ENCOURAGE TEENS TO PLAY IT SAFE? -Advik 

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This article demonstrates the importance of having meaningful family obligations that may be helpful to teens. In One of us is lying Bronwyn has the family obligations of going to Yale as her whole family went. Causing her to feel stressed and unbenficial  to her mental health

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Gender-based Social Expectations for Women

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Be Bold, But Not Too Bold By Katrina Johnson León, Ed.D. One summer, after playing all day with Dal, my favorite male cousin, Dad picked me up and started asking the general questions. I shared that we had decided on our future careers. I would be a nurse and Dal would be the doctor.

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This provides information and statistics on family fracture states separated by age . This can be related to the Novell as addys mom is reliant on men she meets however due to her family structure she wan to be more independent.

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Relationships with parents and families: how they change in adolescence

Teenagers' relationships with their parents and families change during adolescence, but teenagers need parent and family support as much as they did when they were younger.

When your child was young, your role was to nurture and guide them. Now you might be finding that your relationship with your child is becoming more equal.

You're a source of care, emotional support, security and safety for your child, as well as practical and financial help. Your child still loves you and wants you to be involved in their life - even though their attitude or behaviour might sometimes send a different message.

Most young people and their families have some ups and downs during these years, but things usually improve by late adolescence as children become more mature. And family relationships tend to stay strong right through.

Why pre-teens and teenagers need parents and families

Adolescence can be a difficult time - your child is going through rapid physical changes as well as emotional ups and downs. Young people aren't always sure where they fit, and they're still trying to work it out. Adolescence can also be a time when peer influences cause some stress.

During this time your family is a secure emotional base where your child feels loved and accepted, no matter what's going on in the rest of their life. Your family can build and support your child's confidence, resilience, optimism and identity.

When your family sets rules, boundaries and standards of behaviour, you give your child a sense of consistency, predictability, safety and belonging.

And believe it or not, your life experiences and knowledge can be really useful to your child - they just might not always want you to know it!

Supportive and close family relationships protect your child from risky behaviour like alcohol and other drug use and problems like depression. Your support and interest in what your child is doing at school can boost their desire to do well academically too.

Strong family relationships can go a long way towards helping your child grow into a well-adjusted, considerate and caring adult.

Building positive family relationships with teenagers: tips

The ordinary, everyday things that families do together can build and strengthen relationships with teenagers. These tips might help you and your family.

Love and appreciation
Show your child how much you love and appreciate them. This can be as simple as saying 'I love you' each night when they go to bed or giving them a high-five.

Celebrate your child's accomplishments
Celebrating your child's accomplishments, sharing their disappointments, and supporting their hobbies sends the message that your child's interests are important to you. You don't have to make a big deal of this - sometimes it's just a matter of showing up to watch your child play sport or music, or giving them a lift to extracurricular activities.

Family traditions
Family traditions, routines and rituals can help you and your child set aside regular dates and special times. For example, you might have a movie night together, a favourite meal or cooking session on a particular night, a family games afternoon or an evening walk together.

Family rules
Agreed-on rules, limits and consequences give teenagers a sense of security, structure and predictability. They help your child know what standards apply in your family, and what will happen if they push the boundaries. When your child is involved in making your family rules, they're more likely to see them as fair and stick to them. Negotiating rules with your child can also help you to reduce and manage conflict with your child.

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Relationships with parents and families: pre-teens and teenagers

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Teenagers need parents and families for love and support. Strengthen family relationships for teens with family meals, activities, rules and responsibilities.

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This source talks about family structure and how it affects a child’s development. In One of Us is Lying, the book introduces many of the characters, explaining how their family structure is. Characters like Nate and Addy have divorced family structure making it hard for them to grow up in a brighter family. This causes Nate in particular to sell drugs for the sake of their family.

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Family Structure Experiences and Child Socioemotional Development During the First Nine Years of Life: Examining Heterogeneity by Family Structure at Birth

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A vast amount of literature has documented negative associations between family instability and child development, with the largest associations being in the socioemotional (behavioral) domain. Yet, prior work has paid limited attention to differentiating…

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This article talks about societal expectations on boys and men. Because men have a stronger physique than women, many times they are expected to do much more. In the book One of Us is Lying it showcases many of the characters to take on a certain role, guys especially from the way they act. Like Cooper is considered the Jock.

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Key points

Many countries around the world are experiencing shifts in gender stereotypes.

Research reveals the detrimental impact of rigid gender constraints on boys and young men.

Boys and young men often grow up with traditional male expectations restricting emotions.

A common expectation is not what boys and young men should be, but what they should not be - feminine.

Gender expectations have a profound impact on the development and lives of boys and young men. From an early age, they are often subjected to traditional notions of masculinity, which are reinforced by various social institutions such as family, education, religion, and mass media. These expectations not only shape their understanding of what it means to be a man, but also impose unhealthy restrictions on their emotional expressions (psychological well-being) and limit their range of experiences.

Recent research has illuminated the detrimental outcomes of traditional gender expectations. In a study published by Di Bianca and Mahalik in American Psychologist, the authors address theharmful socialization of boys and men and argue that societal expectations of traditional masculinity contribute to health issues, relational oppression, and social injustices. They assert that these issues stem from disconnections between individuals and society, which reinforce rigid notions of manhood[1].

Traditional Masculinity: Defying Femininity

One of the most prevalent gender expectations imposed on boys and young men is the notion of avoiding anything deemed feminine. They are bombarded with messages that associate femininity with weakness, vulnerability, inferiority, and contempt. Through casual teasing and derogatory expressions such as "you fight like a girl," "you cry like a girl," "you're such a sissy," and the many "your mother" jokes, young boys are taught to distance themselves from anything associated with femininity. This social conditioning often sews the seeds of anti-feminine prejudice and misogyny. Consequently, they are conditioned to suppress their emotions, particularly those that are considered feminine, such as empathy, sensitivity, and the ability to establish meaningful connections with others.

On the other hand, boys and young men are often encouraged, both by adults and their peers, to embrace traditionally masculine qualities. Prodded by male social expressions such as "be a man," "boys don't cry," "don't be a wimp," "tough it out," "suck it up," and "shake it off," They are expected to be strong, tough, self-reliant, and dominant in various aspects of life. As they become adults, the pursuit of physical and sexual prowess, financial success, and the acquisition of power and status become benchmarks of male achievement, and the measure of male self-worth based on their ability to conform to these ideals.

However, rigid over-adherence to traditional masculinity can have significant detrimental consequences. The unbridled pursuit of power, control, and dominance often leads to a sense of separateness, hostility, aggression, and violence (psychological and emotional, if not physical). Toxic masculinity, a term that has gained prominence in recent years, refers to the harmful aspects of unchecked masculine behavior. It is characterized by traits such as antagonism, encroachment, emotional suppression, and a disregard for the well-being of others.

Well-Rounded Masculinity: Holistic Success

Fortunately, not all men subscribe to these social norms. Many well-rounded men defy the confines of traditional masculinity and embrace a more expansive understanding of what it means to be a man. They recognize the value of feminine qualities and do not see them as threats to their masculinity. These men exhibit traits such as empathy, compassion, and the ability to foster meaningful connections. (Significantly, some of the most admired and beloved men in human history possess such qualities, including Christ, Buddha, Gandhi, and Martin Luther King, Jr., among others.) By embracing both masculine and feminine qualities, where one can be strong and assertive when necessary, and sensitive and empathetic when important, men can attain personal and professional success with a holistic and inclusive approach.

"Both men and women should feel free to be sensitive. Both men and women should feel free to be strong. It is time that we all perceive gender on a spectrum instead of two sets of opposing ideals." -Emma Watson, United Nations Speech

Dismantling Narrow Gender Expectations

The impact of gender expectations on boys and young men cannot be underestimated. The pressure to conform to traditional notions of masculinity restricts their emotional expression and limits their potential for personal growth, which may lead to physical and mental health issues and many relational difficulties. However, there is hope in the growing recognition of the need for more inclusive and holistic definitions of masculinity.

Research by Priyashantha, De Alwis, and Welmilla published in the Journal of Humanities and Applied Social Sciences indicates that in the last five decades, many regions around the world have experienced shifts in gender norms (including countries in Europe, North America, East Asia, Africa, and the Arab World), resulting in a decline in traditional gender role stereotypes[2]. By challenging rigid gender expectations and embracing a broader range of qualities and experiences, we can foster a healthier and more equitable society for boys and young men to thrive. For tips on how to be well-rounded in communication and relationships, see references below.
© 2023 by Preston C. Ni.

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The Impact of Gender Expectations on Boys and Young Men

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Norms have shifted, but expectations for boys remain.

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Talks about gender norms and the negative impacts they hold such as causing a lack of outside opportunities for people stuck in these roles. With addy being an example as she doesn’t leave her abusive relationship due to her mother saying that’s normal as a women and she needs to deal with it causing negative impacts on her

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How Harmful Gender Norms Create an Unequal World for Children

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Gender norms can cause harm and impact millions of girls and boys around the world, denying them basic human rights like health, education, income equality and a life free of violence.