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Th day of my mothers funeral was the most impactful day of my life. My life was not the same. It was not raining but the umbrella that shielded me from the world was gone. People, or rather family kicked, stomped and threw me out like garbage. How long had they been feeling this way? Why didn't my mother warn me?

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The day I realized life was sad was when I thought the world was all laughs but these men turned out to be trash, this world is turning into ash, and I’m here just trying to get my bag but all these men just want some ass and it’s actually sad that you can be so bland

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A sacred decision, in whispered consent

An intimate dance with fate

I embraced courage, misunderstood

Eight weeks of a life, where decisions belong

A loss, a choice, a complex rite

An ultrasound's imprint, a tangible ghost,

A constant companion, a silent host

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The day we found termites in the apple tree and had to cut it down. The same apple tree I used to play under and swing on. The same apple tree that gifted us sweet fruit and shade from the summer sun. Memories and years carved down to single, hollowed stump. I genuinely think a part of me died that day.

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I look outside the window from my house waiting for my mom to pick me up. She was at the stop sign ready to turn into the gate, but when I blinked her car was no longer there. She was hit by a cement truck in front of me. Me and my brother ran into the streets only to hear her screams and cries. It took an hour for paramedics to get her out of the car and to the hospital. Every night I dreamt of that day, but every night for 3 months my mom wasn’t home. It took 3 months for her to be released. Three months of my siblings and I raising each other. Until this day getting behind a wheel terrifies me. Her broken back and broken knees scare me half to sleep. But she’s okay and I am okay, so everything is okay.

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I had just seen my dog the other day.

I had come back from a run yesterday morning, red in the face, laying down on the cool cement while I catch my breath.

My dog came running up to me, licking my face as I lay there under the trees. I laughed and hugged her while I did my stretches. I then laid down and looked at the sky and she laid down next to me, rolled over asking for her belly to be scratched.

I went inside.

The next day I went on a run and came back, again, laying down on the cement in the backyard.

My dog did not run up to me, but I figured she was chasing lizards in the bushes in the back.

Later, my cousin and I went out to the cement patch to play some badminton.

As we played I noticed the silence. I had heard no rustling in the bushes.

I went to find my dog only to see her bloated under the trees, her body covered in the ivy. She was gone- and with her a piece of me left too.

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The day my mom had a stroke has significantly changed my perspective on how I view life and how I try to live to the fullest and not take things for granted. Getting a call from my mom saying that she was on the way to the hospital has left me devastated because every time that I receive a call from a family member I think of the worst possible things…

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everything’s dope until it’s not,

We’re allowed time to grief but never to heal

Domino effect builds up resentment

And the power of acceptance chances everything.

Doesn’t help that the world loves the remind me but it’s a wonderful thing because it reminds me to be strong

The most impactful day of my life was when I got diagnosed with MS back in 2015 and it’s been an interesting journey thus far. Positive vibes y’all

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The first time I left home was the day that left this sense of hole within my heart. I left behind the people I knew, the atmosphere that felt so familiar to me, so comfortable. I left it all. I carried my suitcase to the car, and sat in the seat for 15 minutes.

What was I without a home?

Without my home? I was nothing. I was to be thrown into a reality that I feared. A setting so different, so far.

I was nobody without my home and it hurt to realize that I would now be alone.

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It was the first day of a new job. The first job right after finishing college and getting my degree. I was wearing a purple button up shirt and nice jeans. I sat in the corner of the PI's office as we were getting ready to interview the first applicant for the research lab. She came in right on time. The PI introduced herself and let me introduce myself. The applicant shared her name then gave 100% of her attention to the PI. I later found out she felt I was much less important than the PI. The date was September 25th, 2013. That was the day my now fiance walked into my life. She missed out on an opportunity to get a free shirt to be there that day and she never let's me forget it. She takes all my sweaters now so I think it was a wise investment on her part.

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The day we left. I remember putting my stuff into a trash bag. It’s weird to think all your stuff can go into one bag and that’s all your belongings. I was twelve so my belongings consisted of band t-shirts and ripped jeans. I remember following my mom into the car. I remember the moonlight hitting the backseat window as I stared into the street. Where would we go? Am I going to school tomorrow? That question feels so little in the grand scheme of things, but it felt important at the time. I wish I could go back and see it from a third person perspective. Maybe give myself a hug.

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My whole life I had been a feminist without knowing

But at age 12 I knew

I knew what a raging feminist looked like

Sparked by the patriarchy that consumed my life

Fueled by the hurt of the world

Engulfed by the belittlement of men

Enraged by my lack of power

But eventually I grew and knew

Knew that this rage could be turned into comfort

Comfort for others that had gone through the same

Soothing words and actions to help the world heal

Healing the world for women

Women who turned burning fires into flames

Flames that burn the patriarchy